Josh has run the numbers on his 40th RSVPs and discovers what every host secretly suspects: a "maybe" is a "no", a non-reply is a "no", and even the yeses can't be trusted.

Then Dion gets pulled into the strange social grey zone between a Marketplace transaction and a friendship. The buyer wants to grab a coffee. Is it a networking move? A genuine friendship bid? And how long can you sit on a reply before silence becomes the answer?

Plus: the awkward etiquette of buying something expensive off a stranger, and where the most reasonable place is to meet.

We upload all our episodes to YouTube so check us out there if you haven't already:  linktr.ee/welcometopatchwork

For a couple of dollars a month you can sign up to our Patreon and get a bonus Patch every off week. Check out: www.patreon.com/welcometopatchwork

Josh has run the numbers on his 40th RSVPs and discovers what every host secretly suspects: a "maybe" is a "no", a non-reply is a "no", and even the yeses can't be trusted.
Then Dion gets pulled into the strange social grey zone between a Marketplace transaction and a friendship. The buyer wants to grab a coffee. Is it a networking move? A genuine friendship bid? And how long can you sit on a reply before silence becomes the answer?
Plus: the awkward etiquette of buying something expensive off a stranger, and where the most reasonable place is to meet.
We upload all our episodes to YouTube so check us out there if you haven't already:&nbsp; linktr.ee/welcometopatchwork
For a couple of dollars a month you can sign up to our Patreon and get a bonus Patch every off week. Check out: <a href="https://www.patreon.com/welcometopatchwork">www.patreon.com/welcometopatchwork</a>

**Nominated for 'Best Comedy' at the Australian Podcast Awards 2018 & 2019**

Have you ever wondered if it’s acceptable to bring food to someone's house and take it back home if no one has eaten it? Well if you have, then you’re in good company. Christian, Dion and Josh are Welcome to Patchwork: An Australian comedy podcast that thinks too hard about the monotony of life. By debating the obvious, challenging social conventions and improvising sketches, we're more concerned with the crumbs than the cookie.

Have you ever wondered if it’s acceptable to bring food to someones house and take it back home if no one has eaten it? Christian, Dion and Josh are Welcome To Patchwork: An Australian comedy podcast that stares far too hard at everyday life.

Welcome To Patchwork

Have you ever wondered if it’s acceptable to bring food to someone's house and take it back home if no one has eaten it? Well if you have, then you’re in good company. Christian, Dion and Josh are Welcome to Patchwork: An Australian comedy podcast that thinks too hard about the monotony of life. By debating the obvious, challenging social conventions and improvising sketches, we're more concerned with the crumbs than the cookie.

Patch #158 -  Is A 'Maybe' RSVP Actually A 'No'?

Dion has decided that clothes don't need to be folded. He thinks she should just be laid flat, one on top of the other, in shirt-shaped stacks. Josh and Christian try to walk the idiot through the obvious problems, and somehow end up designing a wardrobe with one mini drawer per t-shirt, like a tiered pizza oven.

Then the conversation drifts to hanging versus folding. Christian has run out of hanger real estate and now promotes and demotes shirts based on how sexy he felt the last time he wore them.

Plus: what do you do with a shirt that comes home from a smoky venue? Josh quarantines it on the floor. Christian gives it another wear because he secretly likes the smell. And Dion watches on in disbelief!

Dion has decided that clothes don't need to be folded. He thinks she should just be laid flat, one on top of the other, in shirt-shaped stacks. Josh and Christian try to walk the idiot through the obvious problems, and somehow end up designing a wardrobe with one mini drawer per t-shirt, like a tiered pizza oven.
Then the conversation drifts to hanging versus folding. Christian has run out of hanger real estate and now promotes and demotes shirts based on how sexy he felt the last time he wore them.
Plus: what do you do with a shirt that comes home from a smoky venue? Josh quarantines it on the floor. Christian gives it another wear because he secretly likes the smell. And Dion watches on in disbelief!

Do Clothes Actually Need To Be Folded?

Josh drops a chopstick at a restaurant and, without thinking, flags down the waiter for a new one. Dion and Christian are baffled. To them, you pick it up, you wipe it, and then you keep eating. To Josh, that's grub behaviour! We try to work out where the line is between sensible hygiene and prissy fussing, and whether wiping a fork on your t-shirt actually does anything. 

Then Christian gets pulled up over a request he made in a work meeting: He asked people to turn their cameras on. We try and establish when the camera-off culture took hold, and whether eating during a meeting is a fair play or rudeness of the highest order. 

Plus: would you rather eat a Dorito in its current form, or shaped like a Pringle and stacked in a tube? Christian thinks Pringles have figured something out the rest of the industry hasn't.

The episode closes with the three of us trying to recreate a Vangelis instrument with our noses. You'll know the bit.

Follow us on Instagram, YouTube and Facebook: linktr.ee/welcometopatchwork

For a couple of dollars a month you can sign up to our Patreon page and get a bonus Patch every off week! Check out: www.patreon.com/welcometopatchwork

Josh drops a chopstick at a restaurant and, without thinking, flags down the waiter for a new one. Dion and Christian are baffled. To them, you pick it up, you wipe it, and then you keep eating. To Josh, that's grub behaviour! We try to work out where the line is between sensible hygiene and prissy fussing, and whether wiping a fork on your t-shirt actually does anything. Then Christian gets pulled up over a request he made in a work meeting: He asked people to turn their cameras on. We try and establish when the camera-off culture took hold, and whether eating during a meeting is a fair play or rudeness of the highest order.&nbsp; Plus: would you rather eat a Dorito in its current form, or shaped like a Pringle and stacked in a tube? Christian thinks Pringles have figured something out the rest of the industry hasn't.
The episode closes with the three of us trying to recreate a Vangelis instrument with our noses. You'll know the bit. Follow us on Instagram, YouTube and Facebook: linktr.ee/welcometopatchwork For a couple of dollars a month you can sign up to our Patreon page and get a bonus Patch every off week! Check out: www.patreon.com/welcometopatchwork

Patch #157 - If You Drop A Chopstick, Should You Ask For A New One?

Why do pubs put foreign currency all over the wall? Christian noticed it for the first time and now he can't unsee it. Is it a love letter to international travellers, a quiet way for backpackers to offload useless złoty, or just lazy decor copied from every other pub in town?

Then somehow we end up stack-ranking who is the most miserable of the three. Christian wins on volume and consistency, but Josh wins on reaching the lowest depths, because he's Josh. 

Plus: the red cycle soft plastics betrayal, what landfill actually looks like (nobody knows), and the impossibility of living an ethical life when your iPhone, your AliExpress habit, and the billionaire's yacht are all part of the same problem.

Why do pubs put foreign currency all over the wall? Christian noticed it for the first time and now he can't unsee it. Is it a love letter to international travellers, a quiet way for backpackers to offload useless złoty, or just lazy decor copied from every other pub in town?
Then somehow we end up stack-ranking who is the most miserable of the three. Christian wins on volume and consistency, but Josh wins on reaching the lowest depths, because he's Josh.&nbsp;
Plus: the red cycle soft plastics betrayal, what landfill actually looks like (nobody knows), and the impossibility of living an ethical life when your iPhone, your AliExpress habit, and the billionaire's yacht are all part of the same problem.

Patch #158 - Is A 'Maybe' RSVP Actually A 'No'?

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