Welcome To Patchwork
Welcome To Patchwork
Have you ever wondered if it’s acceptable to bring food to someone's house and take it back home if no one has eaten it? Well if you have, then you’re in good company. Christian, Dion and Josh are Welcome to Patchwork: An Australian comedy podcast that thinks too hard about the monotony of life. By debating the obvious, challenging social conventions and improvising sketches, we're more concerned …Social links:
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Patch #150 Livestream - Is This How You Celebrate 150 Episodes?
After eight years, 150 episodes and approximately one and a half Bibles worth of words, Christian, Dion and Josh gather to celebrate the tangled quilt they’ve been slowly unravelling since 2017. This very special Patch, recorded live on YouTube on September 10, 2025, is best experienced by watching…
1:11:34
Should You Eat Leftovers That Make You Feel Sick?
In this Bonus Patch, Josh and Christian reflect on knowingly and repeatedly making themselves unwell by continuing to eat leftovers that have made them sick in the past. For Josh, chilli con carne. For Christian, Broccoli soup. Is it simply a question of sunk costs, stubbornness, or disbelief? We a…
18:07
Patch #149 – Do You Know How Loudly You Chew?
We begin with Josh’s so-called “worst idea ever”: a heated debate about monitor timeout settings that morphs into a discussion about energy saving, screen burn, and whether you can feel your password in your fingers. Then Dion unveils a mysterious crack on his phone’s screen protector—but can’t rec…
35:02
How Do You Safely Take Your Jacket Off While Driving?
What begins as a practical question from Josh spirals into a breakdown of techniques, hand placement, seatbelt etiquette, and the flirtatious potential of a mid-drive unzip. Is it safer to undo your seatbelt or ask your partner to grab the wheel? What’s your jumper removal strategy at a red light? …
13:15
Patch #148 - Do You Panic When A Ball Rolls Your Way?
With Dion back on the mic, we begin by questioning his curious choice to take place his call in another room but on speaker. This quickly turns into a debate about phone etiquette, hands-free habits, and whether Dion’s long-standing fear of mobile radiation is paranoia or just good prep. We also ex…
38:18
Bonus Patch Full O' Scraps
Our scraps runneth over. In this bonus follow-up to Patch 147, we continue sewing together all the little scraps of ideas that never made it into full episodes - but that doesn’t make them any less deserving. This week, we ask: When leaving an event, do you need to say a second goodbye if you've a…
14:36
Patch #147 - Patch Full O' Scraps
From coughing fits to crusty sourdoughs, this episode is made entirely of scraps - old notes, fleeting thoughts, and the kinds of ponderings that once felt too small, too odd, or too unworthy to make the cut. But today, they shine. In this rapid-fire, patchwork-style patch, we discuss: The weird i…
40:03
Are You More Than Just a Customer?
In this Bonus Patch, Josh reflects on a surprise 40th birthday party that involved sparklers, toilet-based serenading, and a photo album of friends’ feet. He also explores the strange urge to prove you “get it” — whether it’s bonding with bar staff over POS systems or reminding everyone he once wor…
18:35
Patch #146 - Do You Bring Your Bins In On Time?
Christian finally gets his ear pierced — but what does it mean to permanently alter your body? Is it self-expression, a longing for transformation, or simply an overdue homage to a bodybuilding uncle from childhood? Meanwhile, Josh is quietly seething at his neighbours who refuse to bring their bin…
32:30
Can You Exercise Away Your Wrinkles?
In this bonus Patch, Christian and Josh slow things down for a conversation about ageing, health, and the small changes that quietly sneak up on you. Josh shares the moment he noticed his first static forehead wrinkle - a line that wouldn’t budge, no matter what face he pulled. What followed was a…
21:07