Dion has finally succumbed to caffeine dependency, and Christian and Josh interrogate his new addiction. What makes a good coffee order? Why does Dion refuse to learn the difference between a flat white and a cappuccino?

Meanwhile, Christian grapples with existential dread every morning, and Josh suggests he simply “get in the shower.” We question whether professional athletes should thank water runners, why tennis demands silence while Formula 1 drivers scream for their lives, and whether football players ignore the national anthem to appear cool.

Plus, Dion reveals a deeply unsettling secret about his morning alarm.

--

Follow us on Instagram, YouTube, TikTok, Twitter and Facebook to see clips from the show: linktr.ee/welcometopatchwork

For a couple of dollars a month you can sign up to our Patreon page and get a bonus Patch every off week! Check out: www.patreon.com/welcometopatchwork

Dion has finally succumbed to caffeine dependency, and Christian and Josh interrogate his new addiction. What makes a good coffee order? Why does Dion refuse to learn the difference between a flat white and a cappuccino?
Meanwhile, Christian grapples with existential dread every morning, and Josh suggests he simply &ldquo;get in the shower.&rdquo; We question whether professional athletes should thank water runners, why tennis demands silence while Formula 1 drivers scream for their lives, and whether football players ignore the national anthem to appear cool.
Plus, Dion reveals a deeply unsettling secret about his morning alarm.
--
Follow us on&nbsp;Instagram,&nbsp;YouTube,&nbsp;TikTok,&nbsp;Twitter&nbsp;and&nbsp;Facebook&nbsp;to see clips from the show:&nbsp;<a href="https://linktr.ee/welcometopatchwork">linktr.ee/welcometopatchwork</a>
For a couple of dollars a month you can sign up to our&nbsp;Patreon&nbsp;page and get a bonus Patch every off week! Check out:&nbsp;<a href="http://www.patreon.com/welcometopatchwork">www.patreon.com/welcometopatchwork</a>

**Nominated for 'Best Comedy' at the Australian Podcast Awards 2018 & 2019**

Have you ever wondered if it’s acceptable to bring food to someone's house and take it back home if no one has eaten it? Well if you have, then you’re in good company. Christian, Dion and Josh are Welcome to Patchwork: An Australian comedy podcast that thinks too hard about the monotony of life. By debating the obvious, challenging social conventions and improvising sketches, we're more concerned with the crumbs than the cookie.

Have you ever wondered if it’s acceptable to bring food to someones house and take it back home if no one has eaten it? Christian, Dion and Josh are Welcome To Patchwork: An Australian comedy podcast that stares far too hard at everyday life.

Welcome To Patchwork

Have you ever wondered if it’s acceptable to bring food to someone's house and take it back home if no one has eaten it? Well if you have, then you’re in good company. Christian, Dion and Josh are Welcome to Patchwork: An Australian comedy podcast that thinks too hard about the monotony of life. By debating the obvious, challenging social conventions and improvising sketches, we're more concerned with the crumbs than the cookie.

Patch #141 - Do You Dread Waking Up In The Morning?

In this Patch, we crown pizza as the best party food for a large group of people before trying to define some rules around quantity, presentation and flavour. Christian feels that hosts must announce the arrival of the pizza to the party, Dion reflects on the pathetic image of guests hovering around unopened pizza boxes and we collectively ask if any other food could act in pizza's place. Josh then recounts a supermarket stakeout involving a would-be Heineken slab thief, and we ponder the ethics of 'dobbing' as an adult. Do you really care about someone stealing from a large supermarket chain? Dion targets Josh for wearing two novelty items to the recording before Josh ponders his responsibilities as a 'tall person' in a crowd. Is there tall privilege? Are taller people really more attractive?

Follow us on Instagram, YouTube, TikTok, Twitter and Facebook to see clips from the show: linktr.ee/welcometopatchwork

For a couple of dollars a month you can sign up to our Patreon page and get a bonus Patch every off week! Check out: www.patreon.com/welcometopatchwork

In this Patch, we crown pizza as the best party food for a large group of people before trying to define some rules around quantity, presentation and flavour. Christian feels that hosts must announce the arrival of the pizza to the party, Dion reflects on the pathetic image of guests hovering around unopened pizza boxes and we collectively ask if any other food could act in pizza's place. Josh then recounts a supermarket stakeout involving a would-be Heineken slab thief, and we ponder the ethics of 'dobbing' as an adult. Do you really care about someone stealing from a large supermarket chain? Dion targets Josh for wearing two novelty items to the recording before Josh ponders his responsibilities as a 'tall person' in a crowd. Is there tall privilege? Are taller people really more attractive?
Follow us on&nbsp;Instagram,&nbsp;YouTube,&nbsp;TikTok,&nbsp;Twitter&nbsp;and&nbsp;Facebook&nbsp;to see clips from the show:&nbsp;<a href="linktr.ee/welcometopatchwork">linktr.ee/welcometopatchwork</a>
For a couple of dollars a month you can sign up to our&nbsp;Patreon&nbsp;page and get a bonus Patch every off week! Check out:&nbsp;<a href="https://www.patreon.com/welcometopatchwork">www.patreon.com/welcometopatchwork</a>

Patch #140 - How Much Pizza Should You Order?

We kick things off with a tale of breakfast gone wrong - a simple potato rosti turns into a moral dilemma when a stray hair is found. Should you just eat around it, ask for a new dish, or push your luck and order something completely different?

As usual, we thank you for your support wonderful Patchreon and wish you all the best for your day. Regards!

We kick things off with a tale of breakfast gone wrong - a simple potato rosti turns into a moral dilemma when a stray hair is found. Should you just eat around it, ask for a new dish, or push your luck and order something completely different?
As usual, we thank you for your support wonderful Patchreon and wish you all the best for your day. Regards!

How Would You React To Finding A Hair In Your Food?

Dion and Christian argue over whether someone can feel proud of arriving to a location on time. Josh tries to share a frustrating experience of being stuck in a queue that wasn't moving at the Australian Open but neither Dion or Christian can understand what he's saying. After some translating, we discuss the circumstances that might make someone leave a queue early and whether those circumstances change when waiting in a phone queue. Finally, Dion asks Josh and Christian to really consider whether the Imperial system is superior to the Metric system and we decide on which unit of measurement we would take with us to a desert island.

Follow us on Instagram, YouTube, TikTok, Twitter and Facebook to see clips from the show: linktr.ee/welcometopatchwork

For a couple of dollars a month you can sign up to our Patreon page and get a bonus Patch every off week! Check out: www.patreon.com/welcometopatchwork

Dion and Christian argue over whether someone can feel proud of arriving to a location on time. Josh tries to share a frustrating experience of being stuck in a queue that wasn't moving at the Australian Open but neither Dion or Christian can understand what he's saying. After some translating, we discuss the circumstances that might make someone leave a queue early and whether those circumstances change when waiting in a phone queue. Finally, Dion asks Josh and Christian to really consider whether the Imperial system is superior to the Metric system and we decide on which unit of measurement we would take with us to a desert island.
Follow us on&nbsp;Instagram,&nbsp;YouTube,&nbsp;TikTok,&nbsp;Twitter&nbsp;and&nbsp;Facebook&nbsp;to see clips from the show:&nbsp;<a href="linktr.ee/welcometopatchwork">linktr.ee/welcometopatchwork</a>
For a couple of dollars a month you can sign up to our&nbsp;Patreon&nbsp;page and get a bonus Patch every off week! Check out:&nbsp;<a href="https://www.patreon.com/welcometopatchwork">www.patreon.com/welcometopatchwork</a>

Patch #141 - Do You Dread Waking Up In The Morning?

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