I think our relationship to lostness and making peace with the fact that it kind of comes up a lot. We tend to act like it's like the big bad Boogeyman and will it come?

I think our relationship to lostness and making peace with the fact that it kind of comes up a lot. We tend to act like it's like the big bad Boogeyman and will it come?

Will it not?

Will it not?

It will be here, you will be lost, it will happen. That is a part of the human experience.

It will be here, you will be lost, it will happen. That is a part of the human experience.

Clear Way is.

Clear Way is.

A New York Times bestselling author and poet. Her work explores hope, resilience, and the power of love. Her books include Heart Talk, Where to Begin, May You Love and Be Loved, and Remember Love.

A New York Times bestselling author and poet. Her work explores hope, resilience, and the power of love. Her books include Heart Talk, Where to Begin, May You Love and Be Loved, and Remember Love.

We don't have to listen to the shadows just because we can hear them. Every moment you feel that the decisions or the voice in your head is someone else's voice, you do have this ability to reclaim it and say, like, is this what I want? Your life is your greatest gift and responsibility. Yeah, And so in that there is this relationship, a constant reclamation is this what I want?

We don't have to listen to the shadows just because we can hear them. Every moment you feel that the decisions or the voice in your head is someone else's voice, you do have this ability to reclaim it and say, like, is this what I want? Your life is your greatest gift and responsibility. Yeah, And so in that there is this relationship, a constant reclamation is this what I want?

I think? Is this what I need?

I think? Is this what I need?

I'm Radi Wukiah and on my podcast A Really Good Cry, we embrace the messy and the beautiful, providing a space for raw and fielded conversations that celebrate vulnerability and allow you to tune in to learn, connect and find comfort together.

I'm Radi Wukiah and on my podcast A Really Good Cry, we embrace the messy and the beautiful, providing a space for raw and fielded conversations that celebrate vulnerability and allow you to tune in to learn, connect and find comfort together.

Thank you for.

Thank you for.

Being here, my gosh, thank you for having me so excited.

Being here, my gosh, thank you for having me so excited.

Honestly, I have to I'm such a huge fan of yours. You have changed so much of my life just by reading your one book, and I can't wait to read so many more of yours. But it has given me. I feel like your books give words to people when they feel like they can't express it themselves. I feel like I've understood myself so much more through reading it. I've noticed things about myself that I didn't even know existed within me, and I just think it's so beautiful how you share yourself with other people in order for them to also feel like they can accept and understand themselves better. So I just want to say thank you so much. I'm so honored to have you, thank you.

Honestly, I have to I'm such a huge fan of yours. You have changed so much of my life just by reading your one book, and I can't wait to read so many more of yours. But it has given me. I feel like your books give words to people when they feel like they can't express it themselves. I feel like I've understood myself so much more through reading it. I've noticed things about myself that I didn't even know existed within me, and I just think it's so beautiful how you share yourself with other people in order for them to also feel like they can accept and understand themselves better. So I just want to say thank you so much. I'm so honored to have you, thank you.

Thank you so much, and thank you for reading it. You were one of my early readers of the book, So thank you.

Thank you so much, and thank you for reading it. You were one of my early readers of the book, So thank you.

It's incredible, it really is.

It's incredible, it really is.

And I wanted to ask you because obviously, like you said, you've done so many things in your life, but you've got this beautiful way of expressing yourself, and I think this day and age, people find it quite difficult to express themselves through words, especially me. I can talk for only myself, but I express myself through crying or through emotion release in that way.

And I wanted to ask you because obviously, like you said, you've done so many things in your life, but you've got this beautiful way of expressing yourself, and I think this day and age, people find it quite difficult to express themselves through words, especially me. I can talk for only myself, but I express myself through crying or through emotion release in that way.

What do you think and how do.

What do you think and how do.

You think people find it difficult to actually use words to express themselves, Like how can people go about being better at that? And what do you think stops people from doing that? Well?

You think people find it difficult to actually use words to express themselves, Like how can people go about being better at that? And what do you think stops people from doing that? Well?

One thing I think is really important, and I say that whether you feel that you're a writer or you're not a writer, I think it's important to write down what is going on. Yeah, because when you start to write, you inherently have like an inventory of what's going on inside of your body, and you're really able to sit and see the stories you tell yourself and see where you're maybe disrupting the stories by trying to kind of bribe yourself out of a feeling or think that you don't deserve a thing, or think that you're not worthy of this or that or whatever, or diminishing something that is reoccurring in your psyche or in your heart, and you can see that you're trying not to think of it. And so I think what goes on in our bodies is often a swirling conversation around the stories we tell ourselves. And if you can put the story on a page, you can at least quiet the conversation, which is usually judgment, irrational ideas around the story and around the narrative and around what's happening. And so I think the more you anyone has a practice of writing it for no other reason but to release, but to identify, but to get to know themselves better and better, which is so important, I think that probably makes it easier to be expressive in conversation. Maybe they'll be there could be more flow. But I think also it's great that we're all different, and it's great that some of us are. You know, for every talker, they need a listener. And I think it's important to say to know if you're someone who can express themselves in a really big way, and that's that's great for you, or if you need a really cozy nest, or you need just two people, and I think it's okay too. It's more important to identify where and how you can express yourself than if you can. You always can, but you you just might need to stop or you know, we just need to stop judging ourselves for not being expressive in the ways other people are expressive. So you know, I feel like for every person I know who says like, I'm not great with expressing myself, I was like, well, probably to me then, or to a crowd or to a stranger, but you're probably very good at expressing yourself to your partner or your husband, or your best friend or the one or two people you'd get really connected to, and that's enough.

One thing I think is really important, and I say that whether you feel that you're a writer or you're not a writer, I think it's important to write down what is going on. Yeah, because when you start to write, you inherently have like an inventory of what's going on inside of your body, and you're really able to sit and see the stories you tell yourself and see where you're maybe disrupting the stories by trying to kind of bribe yourself out of a feeling or think that you don't deserve a thing, or think that you're not worthy of this or that or whatever, or diminishing something that is reoccurring in your psyche or in your heart, and you can see that you're trying not to think of it. And so I think what goes on in our bodies is often a swirling conversation around the stories we tell ourselves. And if you can put the story on a page, you can at least quiet the conversation, which is usually judgment, irrational ideas around the story and around the narrative and around what's happening. And so I think the more you anyone has a practice of writing it for no other reason but to release, but to identify, but to get to know themselves better and better, which is so important, I think that probably makes it easier to be expressive in conversation. Maybe they'll be there could be more flow. But I think also it's great that we're all different, and it's great that some of us are. You know, for every talker, they need a listener. And I think it's important to say to know if you're someone who can express themselves in a really big way, and that's that's great for you, or if you need a really cozy nest, or you need just two people, and I think it's okay too. It's more important to identify where and how you can express yourself than if you can. You always can, but you you just might need to stop or you know, we just need to stop judging ourselves for not being expressive in the ways other people are expressive. So you know, I feel like for every person I know who says like, I'm not great with expressing myself, I was like, well, probably to me then, or to a crowd or to a stranger, but you're probably very good at expressing yourself to your partner or your husband, or your best friend or the one or two people you'd get really connected to, and that's enough.

Yeah, And I feel like, I mean, I love what you said about journaling. I've had it on and off relationship with it. More so because I think when you do end up putting pen to paper, it becomes this one. I would have a filter up first, because you're so used to other people seeing everything that you do now right, And then to push through that filter one It obviously takes practice, but to push through that filter that other people the lens that other people are seeing you with, to then actually see you.

Yeah, And I feel like, I mean, I love what you said about journaling. I've had it on and off relationship with it. More so because I think when you do end up putting pen to paper, it becomes this one. I would have a filter up first, because you're so used to other people seeing everything that you do now right, And then to push through that filter one It obviously takes practice, but to push through that filter that other people the lens that other people are seeing you with, to then actually see you.

Sometimes it can be really scary.

Sometimes it can be really scary.

And so I notice myself where it gets to points in my life where I'm kind of trying to subdue something or not really want don't want to actually acknowledge it. I will avoid putting pen to paper because it's almost too scary to even put it into words. And I think sometimes that's why words can be harder than getting angry or crying, because you don't have to necessarily be as honest with yourself, but I do. I have started seeing the importance of using words, even with all the other tools of emotion release. But words I think are necessary for communication between people, for people to be able to understand you, because regardless of whether people will know you're upset if you're crying, but will they know how they can help you? Will they know exactly what's happening in your heart, And really it's the only way that we can help someone, help us, but also help to Really, I think there's a words of the way that we kind of hide from and everything else I think from I can talk for only myself, but has been a way to escape the words and be able to at least just release a little bit out.

And so I notice myself where it gets to points in my life where I'm kind of trying to subdue something or not really want don't want to actually acknowledge it. I will avoid putting pen to paper because it's almost too scary to even put it into words. And I think sometimes that's why words can be harder than getting angry or crying, because you don't have to necessarily be as honest with yourself, but I do. I have started seeing the importance of using words, even with all the other tools of emotion release. But words I think are necessary for communication between people, for people to be able to understand you, because regardless of whether people will know you're upset if you're crying, but will they know how they can help you? Will they know exactly what's happening in your heart, And really it's the only way that we can help someone, help us, but also help to Really, I think there's a words of the way that we kind of hide from and everything else I think from I can talk for only myself, but has been a way to escape the words and be able to at least just release a little bit out.

Yeah, and most of the time we're probably not of the anxiety we have around speaking up or saying something is not in the actual words, but what happens after Yeah. My brother always says the best and the worst thing about the truth is it gets instant results, and so a lot of times, you know, the conversations we're avoiding are really the results of the truth.

Yeah, and most of the time we're probably not of the anxiety we have around speaking up or saying something is not in the actual words, but what happens after Yeah. My brother always says the best and the worst thing about the truth is it gets instant results, and so a lot of times, you know, the conversations we're avoiding are really the results of the truth.

We have to share.

We have to share.

Yeah, it's not so much that you had to say those ten words and make a sentence. It's that those ten words to say the sentence are do you want to commit.

Yeah, it's not so much that you had to say those ten words and make a sentence. It's that those ten words to say the sentence are do you want to commit.

To me or not? Or do you know what I mean? And I think that's hard.

To me or not? Or do you know what I mean? And I think that's hard.

It's the vulnerability of it.

It's the vulnerability of it.

I think when you end up sharing words with someone, it's easy to kind of hide behind an external you know, you can be very poised and you can feel really confident. But as soon as and I noticed that with my friends in relationships or that are dating, it's like I don't want to tell him I like him, Like I don't want to use the words I've already shown him. I've showed up every single day, I've.

I think when you end up sharing words with someone, it's easy to kind of hide behind an external you know, you can be very poised and you can feel really confident. But as soon as and I noticed that with my friends in relationships or that are dating, it's like I don't want to tell him I like him, Like I don't want to use the words I've already shown him. I've showed up every single day, I've.

Sent him messages.

Sent him messages.

But actually saying those words it almost it's a full version of you letting your guard down, and that can often be really scary.

But actually saying those words it almost it's a full version of you letting your guard down, and that can often be really scary.

I mean, there's movies and TV shows and so much of our culture that is just around whether or not you can say the words I love you, or the struggle to say the words I'm sorry, but those words are shorthand for an entire experience of hope that you have for a relationship with somebody. Right, So if you say I'm sorry, you know, I'm sorry, it's really shorthand for I see you and I recognize my own imperfections in.

I mean, there's movies and TV shows and so much of our culture that is just around whether or not you can say the words I love you, or the struggle to say the words I'm sorry, but those words are shorthand for an entire experience of hope that you have for a relationship with somebody. Right, So if you say I'm sorry, you know, I'm sorry, it's really shorthand for I see you and I recognize my own imperfections in.

How we are in community.

How we are in community.

I love you is shorthand for I hope you'll hold my heart with respect and not break it.

I love you is shorthand for I hope you'll hold my heart with respect and not break it.

And that's scary.

And that's scary.

Yeah, you're so right.

Yeah, you're so right.

Within those small words or the two words that you say, there can either be no emphasis or no meaning behind it, or there can be so much emphasis and meaning behind it.

Within those small words or the two words that you say, there can either be no emphasis or no meaning behind it, or there can be so much emphasis and meaning behind it.

Well, that's why.

Well, that's why.

And when there is that, I think those are the ones that are hard to say. I don't think it's hard for anyone to say, you know, oh yes, can I have phrase with that? Yeah?

And when there is that, I think those are the ones that are hard to say. I don't think it's hard for anyone to say, you know, oh yes, can I have phrase with that? Yeah?

Exactly, exactly.

Exactly, exactly.

I love how you talk about the difference between fear based decisions or fear based living and then making grounding choices like you use that in your book that you've written. How would you say you can identify these fear based decisions, like how can you reflect on yourself and recognize that you are living from a place of fear? Because I always find for me often can end up being on autopilot, where if you've been living in that state for a long time, that can end up being your normality. It's like you don't know what can be without experiencing it, and so your normality could be living from a place of fear. You've just settled into it. So what would you say are good ways to recognize that you're living from a place of fear.

I love how you talk about the difference between fear based decisions or fear based living and then making grounding choices like you use that in your book that you've written. How would you say you can identify these fear based decisions, like how can you reflect on yourself and recognize that you are living from a place of fear? Because I always find for me often can end up being on autopilot, where if you've been living in that state for a long time, that can end up being your normality. It's like you don't know what can be without experiencing it, and so your normality could be living from a place of fear. You've just settled into it. So what would you say are good ways to recognize that you're living from a place of fear.

I think anything you can do that helps you to be more as embodied as possible. So when you pause, when you create space to breathe, when you create space to kind of notice your heart rate, or notice how your head is feeling, or notice where your shoulders are, you can really see how the body wants to let you know that there's anxiety or fear moving through it. And I think that if you feel those things, like if you feel you know, your stomach doesn't feel easy, or your heart is racing, or your shoulders are a peer, fear is not something that is comfortable in our bodies. So if you do you any type of exercise for embodiment to kind of sink in and like check in with yourself, you'll usually find fear because it's it's not really something I feel that is that feels at home in us and so it you can find that disruption.

I think anything you can do that helps you to be more as embodied as possible. So when you pause, when you create space to breathe, when you create space to kind of notice your heart rate, or notice how your head is feeling, or notice where your shoulders are, you can really see how the body wants to let you know that there's anxiety or fear moving through it. And I think that if you feel those things, like if you feel you know, your stomach doesn't feel easy, or your heart is racing, or your shoulders are a peer, fear is not something that is comfortable in our bodies. So if you do you any type of exercise for embodiment to kind of sink in and like check in with yourself, you'll usually find fear because it's it's not really something I feel that is that feels at home in us and so it you can find that disruption.

I think, yeah, I agree, I think with the especially, your physical body is just a manifestation of what's happening inside. And as soon as you notice, like for me, it's my breath when i'm when I'm a mode of fear and i'm and i'm you know, functioning from that point of view. I noticed my breath stays here like it's fully, it's shallow, it doesn't go beyond my chest.

I think, yeah, I agree, I think with the especially, your physical body is just a manifestation of what's happening inside. And as soon as you notice, like for me, it's my breath when i'm when I'm a mode of fear and i'm and i'm you know, functioning from that point of view. I noticed my breath stays here like it's fully, it's shallow, it doesn't go beyond my chest.

Or I'm just not breathing at all, Like you're just like and you're like, wow, I haven't taken a breath all day.

Or I'm just not breathing at all, Like you're just like and you're like, wow, I haven't taken a breath all day.

Yeah, And I mean for so many people, fear and whether it's fear or anxiety, both have similar symptoms of.

Yeah, And I mean for so many people, fear and whether it's fear or anxiety, both have similar symptoms of.

Your physical body. Either.

Your physical body. Either.

I know, I know friends who go into rashes. They'll lose their hair from it. You know, your physical body tells you a lot and it will keep screaming at you until you really listen.

I know, I know friends who go into rashes. They'll lose their hair from it. You know, your physical body tells you a lot and it will keep screaming at you until you really listen.

And anxiety is fear. Anxiety is a symptom of fear. Definitely.

And anxiety is fear. Anxiety is a symptom of fear. Definitely.

Anxiety is the kind of mind's way of saying, you know.

Anxiety is the kind of mind's way of saying, you know.

Be alert, be alert, be alert, be alert, be alert.

Be alert, be alert, be alert, be alert, be alert.

Something something is not something's going to happen, and that's an and in that there has there there is an underlying belief system that things don't end up okay. And when we live in a world where there's so much not okayness, it is very difficult to not succumb to that mindset.

Something something is not something's going to happen, and that's an and in that there has there there is an underlying belief system that things don't end up okay. And when we live in a world where there's so much not okayness, it is very difficult to not succumb to that mindset.

And is it is a fight for peace of mind. It really is.

And is it is a fight for peace of mind. It really is.

You have to have thirty different ways to have some type of defense against anxiety, in some type of way to grab on to peace and whatever that is, whether that's by having certain friends or that you just feel that helps soothe you, or noticing your own sensitivities. I mean, you might just be going through like you know, we were talking earlier about if you take a red act and then you have to come back and you're really exhausted and you're really overtired, there might be certain things you just have to cancel the next day because you're trying to hold onto peace. And so you might say, like, you know what, I was supposed to have this work dinner with somebody who requires a lot of my energy, and I don't have the energy for that, and so can I give myself care in this moment? Can I walk towards a sense of peace instead of a sense of anxiety and cancel that you know and have that kind of high integrity moment. Yes, And I think a lot of anxiety, yes, is so much of it as our genetic set.

You have to have thirty different ways to have some type of defense against anxiety, in some type of way to grab on to peace and whatever that is, whether that's by having certain friends or that you just feel that helps soothe you, or noticing your own sensitivities. I mean, you might just be going through like you know, we were talking earlier about if you take a red act and then you have to come back and you're really exhausted and you're really overtired, there might be certain things you just have to cancel the next day because you're trying to hold onto peace. And so you might say, like, you know what, I was supposed to have this work dinner with somebody who requires a lot of my energy, and I don't have the energy for that, and so can I give myself care in this moment? Can I walk towards a sense of peace instead of a sense of anxiety and cancel that you know and have that kind of high integrity moment. Yes, And I think a lot of anxiety, yes, is so much of it as our genetic set.

Points, depending on what you're you know kind of mental health world is like. And there's a lot that.

Points, depending on what you're you know kind of mental health world is like. And there's a lot that.

We do where we really feed anxiety. And I think if we consider the ways that we feed anxiety as a way that we are embracing fear, we'd want more to change those habits really allow anxiety to fish.

We do where we really feed anxiety. And I think if we consider the ways that we feed anxiety as a way that we are embracing fear, we'd want more to change those habits really allow anxiety to fish.

Yeah, because I think there's one part, which is our internal anxiety. But what we often forget is that a lot of our external world is, like you said, feeding into that. So, yes, you may have an element of it already in tending. There may be a lot of things too worry about. But then how are you sleeping? What are you feeding your mind? What are pouring through into your senses? And I've been thinking about that a lot, actually, because I go through bouts of watching reality TV, and I do notice so much. I stopped watching scary things or anything that makes me feel scared for the past eight or nine years, and it made a huge difference to my day to day anxiety. But randomly I'd get recommended a show and I'd start watching it, and the level of consciousness of what I'm watching feeds into my daily activities, and I will wake up with anxiety when I've been watching something that's been super high stress or where people in the show are really anxious. And so what you allow into your senses and every single sense, at every single moment. And in Sanskrit there's a word called some scars, and I love that word. It means footprints, but it says that everything that you allow into your ears, even the sense your eyes, you know, through every part of you, leaves little footprints, some bigger than others, and those footprints are then almost molding how you are then shifting through the day. And for a long time I stopped specific types of music, like I went through a phase where I was really trying to see what a difference it made, and so I stopped listening to any kind of aggressive music. I wouldn't watch any TV that was that stimulated me in that way. I would there was, I had curated it, and I honestly can say I felt so much peace during that time.

Yeah, because I think there's one part, which is our internal anxiety. But what we often forget is that a lot of our external world is, like you said, feeding into that. So, yes, you may have an element of it already in tending. There may be a lot of things too worry about. But then how are you sleeping? What are you feeding your mind? What are pouring through into your senses? And I've been thinking about that a lot, actually, because I go through bouts of watching reality TV, and I do notice so much. I stopped watching scary things or anything that makes me feel scared for the past eight or nine years, and it made a huge difference to my day to day anxiety. But randomly I'd get recommended a show and I'd start watching it, and the level of consciousness of what I'm watching feeds into my daily activities, and I will wake up with anxiety when I've been watching something that's been super high stress or where people in the show are really anxious. And so what you allow into your senses and every single sense, at every single moment. And in Sanskrit there's a word called some scars, and I love that word. It means footprints, but it says that everything that you allow into your ears, even the sense your eyes, you know, through every part of you, leaves little footprints, some bigger than others, and those footprints are then almost molding how you are then shifting through the day. And for a long time I stopped specific types of music, like I went through a phase where I was really trying to see what a difference it made, and so I stopped listening to any kind of aggressive music. I wouldn't watch any TV that was that stimulated me in that way. I would there was, I had curated it, and I honestly can say I felt so much peace during that time.

Slowly things started seeping back.

Slowly things started seeping back.

In yeah, but it really does make a difference, and so a lot of anxiety could actually be prevented, or our fear can be prevented just by changing so much externally.

In yeah, but it really does make a difference, and so a lot of anxiety could actually be prevented, or our fear can be prevented just by changing so much externally.

Yeah, And you know, I have this conversation in my household a lot, which is that you know, everything that's big is always ten or twenty different things, and so you don't have to think about the one big solution for the big thing. You can just kind of tackle it from the thirty different ways. So it just might be the movies. I'm the same. I don't watch anything that's stressful ever, like I just And it's really interesting because I remember a few years ago, I think I was having like eggshimmer or something, and so I had seen this doctor who was was like, I'd put me on some type of anti inflammatory thing. And I'm from Louisiana, so it was the first time in my life someone was.

Yeah, And you know, I have this conversation in my household a lot, which is that you know, everything that's big is always ten or twenty different things, and so you don't have to think about the one big solution for the big thing. You can just kind of tackle it from the thirty different ways. So it just might be the movies. I'm the same. I don't watch anything that's stressful ever, like I just And it's really interesting because I remember a few years ago, I think I was having like eggshimmer or something, and so I had seen this doctor who was was like, I'd put me on some type of anti inflammatory thing. And I'm from Louisiana, so it was the first time in my life someone was.

Like, you can't have hot sauce.

Like, you can't have hot sauce.

Oh yeah, And I was like, whoa what, because like I'd never like obviously, like a hot hot pepper is very inflammatory. And so I didn't have hot sauce for like a year or something like that. And what's really interesting is and when you have it again. It is like feels like the spiciest thing on earth because you actually have desensitized your palate if you have put hot sauce in every thing for so long.

Oh yeah, And I was like, whoa what, because like I'd never like obviously, like a hot hot pepper is very inflammatory. And so I didn't have hot sauce for like a year or something like that. And what's really interesting is and when you have it again. It is like feels like the spiciest thing on earth because you actually have desensitized your palate if you have put hot sauce in every thing for so long.

And so what's really interesting.

And so what's really interesting.

About a media diet if you will this idea that if you have removed certain things, they are almost twice as glaring or make you feel twice as much if you start to incorporate them again. So you feel real stress or anxiety by having the stressful kind of anxious character or thing on or you know. I remember during during COVID, I was like I couldn't watch anything where like the world was ending.

About a media diet if you will this idea that if you have removed certain things, they are almost twice as glaring or make you feel twice as much if you start to incorporate them again. So you feel real stress or anxiety by having the stressful kind of anxious character or thing on or you know. I remember during during COVID, I was like I couldn't watch anything where like the world was ending.

Yes, you know, I was like, ah, but those of the movies that were trending on Netflix at the time, I.

Yes, you know, I was like, ah, but those of the movies that were trending on Netflix at the time, I.

Was like, what is happening? What is like wrong with us?

Was like, what is happening? What is like wrong with us?

Can we not like all the movies that were recommended or that people were watching were all end of the world movies.

Can we not like all the movies that were recommended or that people were watching were all end of the world movies.

I was like, what is like what are we doing right now? This cannot be helpful? Like no, you know, I don't know what is or isn't healthy for someone else, but like I feel pretty sure I could identify something as helpful.

I was like, what is like what are we doing right now? This cannot be helpful? Like no, you know, I don't know what is or isn't healthy for someone else, but like I feel pretty sure I could identify something as helpful.

And I was like, there's just no.

And I was like, there's just no.

Way that like movies that are just seeped in doom can could possibly help us right now.

Way that like movies that are just seeped in doom can could possibly help us right now.

No, And I think we're kind of unaware and desensitized to it because it's become so normal to watch things like that. My friend was telling me they're part of Netflix and they're saying the stuff that's actually being bought is the dark, the gloomy, the scary, the intense, and it's almost feeding into people's fears. But for some reason, if you're and I think it is the concept of if you're living in fear, it feels comforting to watch fear too. But you're right, I think taking that time away from it will help to.

No, And I think we're kind of unaware and desensitized to it because it's become so normal to watch things like that. My friend was telling me they're part of Netflix and they're saying the stuff that's actually being bought is the dark, the gloomy, the scary, the intense, and it's almost feeding into people's fears. But for some reason, if you're and I think it is the concept of if you're living in fear, it feels comforting to watch fear too. But you're right, I think taking that time away from it will help to.

The opposite.

The opposite.

I think I'm like literally one step away from being one of those people who watches like the Christmas ham all around.

I think I'm like literally one step away from being one of those people who watches like the Christmas ham all around.

I'm like, I'm this Plus.

I'm like, I'm this Plus.

I was like, I'm getting to that time of year there. Yeah, what are your favorite things?

I was like, I'm getting to that time of year there. Yeah, what are your favorite things?

I mean, I would love to hear from you, Like, what do you do on a daily basis to help with those the fear levels, your mood, your energy levels, what are your kind of not non negotiables, but the things you found that have really helped you.

I mean, I would love to hear from you, Like, what do you do on a daily basis to help with those the fear levels, your mood, your energy levels, what are your kind of not non negotiables, but the things you found that have really helped you.

I think looking at any way of feeling good with as much flexibility as you can possibly have without it veering towards a space of non discipline is really helpful. So I think this idea that you know, I know so many people who are struggle to meditate until they loosen up their idea of what meditating is. Perhaps you can't sit on the pillow for the twenty two minutes, or you or the TM mantra doesn't work well for you, or the whatever.

I think looking at any way of feeling good with as much flexibility as you can possibly have without it veering towards a space of non discipline is really helpful. So I think this idea that you know, I know so many people who are struggle to meditate until they loosen up their idea of what meditating is. Perhaps you can't sit on the pillow for the twenty two minutes, or you or the TM mantra doesn't work well for you, or the whatever.

But have you.

But have you.

Tried a seven minute meditation in the bathtub and you keep your eyes open and you don't and you don't try to think you're meditating in a right or wrong way, or have you decided that, Okay, I'm going to go I do this every day, go on.

Tried a seven minute meditation in the bathtub and you keep your eyes open and you don't and you don't try to think you're meditating in a right or wrong way, or have you decided that, Okay, I'm going to go I do this every day, go on.

A walk in the canyon.

A walk in the canyon.

That I live in, and I am not on my phone, and I just and I make it a walk of noticing, and I just noticed things around me.

That I live in, and I am not on my phone, and I just and I make it a walk of noticing, and I just noticed things around me.

And so I just noticed, oh, that tree.

And so I just noticed, oh, that tree.

Looks different than it did the other day, or oh I never noticed that that that house has.

Looks different than it did the other day, or oh I never noticed that that that house has.

A flower hail in the front, or you know.

A flower hail in the front, or you know.

And I think this idea that we practice noticing, especially the natural world around us, because that is where we belong and there so this idea that we are almost giving this daily uh seeing and respect of you know, the space in which we belong is I think really helpful, and because it also helps us to feel big and small at the same time, which I think is always the most helpful kind of I think hadspace to be in where you're like, yes, it's all important, and you know, what I feel is big and I'm small and a part of something big, and in that I'm never alone, and in that I always have some place to call home. And so I think me, I definitely like my walks, and I like to just truly have that flexibility where sometimes the best thing you can do for yourself is call a friend that you just really want to catch up with, or you know that hearing their voice is going to make you feel better. And I think about following and moving towards what feels good and not being afraid to walk away from things that don't you know.

And I think this idea that we practice noticing, especially the natural world around us, because that is where we belong and there so this idea that we are almost giving this daily uh seeing and respect of you know, the space in which we belong is I think really helpful, and because it also helps us to feel big and small at the same time, which I think is always the most helpful kind of I think hadspace to be in where you're like, yes, it's all important, and you know, what I feel is big and I'm small and a part of something big, and in that I'm never alone, and in that I always have some place to call home. And so I think me, I definitely like my walks, and I like to just truly have that flexibility where sometimes the best thing you can do for yourself is call a friend that you just really want to catch up with, or you know that hearing their voice is going to make you feel better. And I think about following and moving towards what feels good and not being afraid to walk away from things that don't you know.

I think so much.

I think so much.

Of the suffering we have or because we have relationships we don't want to be in or they're not in the right they're not the right dynamic, but we feel we have to because of history or because of whatever, or you could have one day where you were feeling really high energy, so you commit to a lot of things.

Of the suffering we have or because we have relationships we don't want to be in or they're not in the right they're not the right dynamic, but we feel we have to because of history or because of whatever, or you could have one day where you were feeling really high energy, so you commit to a lot of things.

That you actually don't want to do.

That you actually don't want to do.

Yeah, And so I think actually having the like self integrity to I always say this that there's no such thing as a hell maybe.

Yeah, And so I think actually having the like self integrity to I always say this that there's no such thing as a hell maybe.

So it's like is it a no or is it a yes?

So it's like is it a no or is it a yes?

And if it's in the maybe, then it's then it's that's just not a real thing. Is just this kind of purgatory we're in all the time. If you are like, oh, should I go should I not go?

And if it's in the maybe, then it's then it's that's just not a real thing. Is just this kind of purgatory we're in all the time. If you are like, oh, should I go should I not go?

On?

On?

I'm like, if you're asking yourself that, then like you have just you have decided that the only way you're going to move through this is in a space of anxiety instead of just doing the thing where you're like, yes, I might let someone down, but if I need to do this for myself, I need to do this for myself, and.

I'm like, if you're asking yourself that, then like you have just you have decided that the only way you're going to move through this is in a space of anxiety instead of just doing the thing where you're like, yes, I might let someone down, but if I need to do this for myself, I need to do this for myself, and.

You hope the people who love you can respect that.

You hope the people who love you can respect that.

Yeah.

Yeah.

No, I mean I'm definitely a culprit of that. I'm in the maybe state way too much. But I also loved what you said about how you know, I think wellness and every part of our life, whether it's the way that you should look the way that you should act.

No, I mean I'm definitely a culprit of that. I'm in the maybe state way too much. But I also loved what you said about how you know, I think wellness and every part of our life, whether it's the way that you should look the way that you should act.

Everything ends up.

Everything ends up.

You think you have to be so uniform with everyone else because you jump on a trend or there's everyone ends up trying to do the same thing. But actually, when you think about your own practices, and which is why I love ioveada so much, because it's such an individual thing.

You think you have to be so uniform with everyone else because you jump on a trend or there's everyone ends up trying to do the same thing. But actually, when you think about your own practices, and which is why I love ioveada so much, because it's such an individual thing.

Everything from your.

Everything from your.

Health to what you have to do for your mind, to your body, to the food that you eat, it's so individual. And I think meditation practices, and even if you're living with someone like for me and Jay, our meditation practices also look different. I wake up a little bit earlier than he does naturally, and he will walk about sometimes and he'll meditate, and I like sitting in one place. You know, we have so many different ways of doing it, but we can end up judging ourselves based on what we see other people doing.

Health to what you have to do for your mind, to your body, to the food that you eat, it's so individual. And I think meditation practices, and even if you're living with someone like for me and Jay, our meditation practices also look different. I wake up a little bit earlier than he does naturally, and he will walk about sometimes and he'll meditate, and I like sitting in one place. You know, we have so many different ways of doing it, but we can end up judging ourselves based on what we see other people doing.

And then you have this deep.

And then you have this deep.

Expectation of oh, I didn't feel that when I was meditating, or I didn't feel that when I went on the walk, I didn't care about the flowers.

Expectation of oh, I didn't feel that when I was meditating, or I didn't feel that when I went on the walk, I didn't care about the flowers.

But that's also okay.

But that's also okay.

And I think there's also this element of consistency where I feel that there's this pressure of Oh, I've done this thing for thirty days, and you know that I can feel accomplished by But sometimes I'll show up to my practice and I will be there physically but not their mentally. And I've done that so many times. But what that has done for me is shown that I can commit to something and it keeps that ball rolling. Like I do believe in a sense of freedom. But then at the same time, I think there is a beauty in showing up for yourself every day, even when you don't want to.

And I think there's also this element of consistency where I feel that there's this pressure of Oh, I've done this thing for thirty days, and you know that I can feel accomplished by But sometimes I'll show up to my practice and I will be there physically but not their mentally. And I've done that so many times. But what that has done for me is shown that I can commit to something and it keeps that ball rolling. Like I do believe in a sense of freedom. But then at the same time, I think there is a beauty in showing up for yourself every day, even when you don't want to.

There's a lot to be gained in having discipline, and I think in that that's where I mean, there's this fine balance of flexibility and discipline where the flexibility might be yes, I'm going to do this thing for thirty days, but I keep trying to do it in the morning and it's not feeling growing in the morning, so I'm actually going to try it in the afternoon. Or you know, as long as I just got on the mat every day for thirty years, maybe I did yoga for an hour, or maybe I did it for ten minutes, or maybe I meditated for did a two minute meditation, or maybe I did a ten minute and I'm at and I'm continuing to say through my practice of being disciplined about something that I do believe this is important. Yeah, And I also am trying to understand how it can be create a high functioning something high functioning for me and so that I can truly reef the bend if it's because listen, I know a lot of people who meditate every day and are like nuts, you know, like and and but it's actually because maybe it's the wrong meditation for them, or maybe they actually really need a walk and need to go outside and have sunlight on their skin while they while they kind of leave their thoughts.

There's a lot to be gained in having discipline, and I think in that that's where I mean, there's this fine balance of flexibility and discipline where the flexibility might be yes, I'm going to do this thing for thirty days, but I keep trying to do it in the morning and it's not feeling growing in the morning, so I'm actually going to try it in the afternoon. Or you know, as long as I just got on the mat every day for thirty years, maybe I did yoga for an hour, or maybe I did it for ten minutes, or maybe I meditated for did a two minute meditation, or maybe I did a ten minute and I'm at and I'm continuing to say through my practice of being disciplined about something that I do believe this is important. Yeah, And I also am trying to understand how it can be create a high functioning something high functioning for me and so that I can truly reef the bend if it's because listen, I know a lot of people who meditate every day and are like nuts, you know, like and and but it's actually because maybe it's the wrong meditation for them, or maybe they actually really need a walk and need to go outside and have sunlight on their skin while they while they kind of leave their thoughts.

And some people, if they.

And some people, if they.

Sit, they stew, yeah, and some so that's why some people need to you know, I feel that way a lot where I'm like, I just have to move because my like I am like, you know, I sit and write all day, so I feel that I churn all day.

Sit, they stew, yeah, and some so that's why some people need to you know, I feel that way a lot where I'm like, I just have to move because my like I am like, you know, I sit and write all day, so I feel that I churn all day.

So I say that all the time.

So I say that all the time.

I'm like when I'm I I have to have a little like snacks all day when I eat, and because I feel like a little athlete that's like just churning, churning, churning, churning, like and so but that's just who I am so when I try to go from this churning, churning, churning sitting to the this sitting, it doesn't really translate.

I'm like when I'm I I have to have a little like snacks all day when I eat, and because I feel like a little athlete that's like just churning, churning, churning, churning, like and so but that's just who I am so when I try to go from this churning, churning, churning sitting to the this sitting, it doesn't really translate.

Yeah, I get that so much. I feel the same way. I have to have some sort of move in my day because even if I don't physically have movement, I feel stagnant internally. I found movements such a beautiful way to release. And whether that's in walking or whether that's a high intensity training class like whatever that movement is. I think movement of body really stimulates movement of mind and of I mean it stimulates so much well.

Yeah, I get that so much. I feel the same way. I have to have some sort of move in my day because even if I don't physically have movement, I feel stagnant internally. I found movements such a beautiful way to release. And whether that's in walking or whether that's a high intensity training class like whatever that movement is. I think movement of body really stimulates movement of mind and of I mean it stimulates so much well.

Andrey know that because if you want to kind of start to rewire your nervous system, it is going to be a physical thing. I mean not to sound dark, but that's why they did like electroshock therapy, which is like very sick in the head obviously, but there is this idea that you know, we do know from data and studies that the body traps trauma, that body traps, I mean, all of these things.

Andrey know that because if you want to kind of start to rewire your nervous system, it is going to be a physical thing. I mean not to sound dark, but that's why they did like electroshock therapy, which is like very sick in the head obviously, but there is this idea that you know, we do know from data and studies that the body traps trauma, that body traps, I mean, all of these things.

Live in the body.

Live in the body.

So you this idea that you are doing this movement out of you can start to repattern the piece at which your nervous system is moving and informing your mind and your kind of spiritual Yeah.

So you this idea that you are doing this movement out of you can start to repattern the piece at which your nervous system is moving and informing your mind and your kind of spiritual Yeah.

I always find when I go off track or I don't show up in those thirty days, it's like my mind starts tricking me to be Like, you feel this guilt first of all, and then that guilt translates to not showing up again. Yeah, And it's this tricky cycle that you go through where you're like, oh, well I didn't commit to your mindset.

I always find when I go off track or I don't show up in those thirty days, it's like my mind starts tricking me to be Like, you feel this guilt first of all, and then that guilt translates to not showing up again. Yeah, And it's this tricky cycle that you go through where you're like, oh, well I didn't commit to your mindset.

Well maybe you just shouldn't do it.

Well maybe you just shouldn't do it.

It's just not for you, you know, take a break from it. But actually that can end up being I noticed that's actually either my lazy self or this feeling of I didn't complete and now I have to start all over again. And that guilt really stops me from the practice I know is good for me.

It's just not for you, you know, take a break from it. But actually that can end up being I noticed that's actually either my lazy self or this feeling of I didn't complete and now I have to start all over again. And that guilt really stops me from the practice I know is good for me.

And so actually the.

And so actually the.

Guilt doesn't help in any way. It doesn't fuel me to keep going. It stops me from doing something I know I actually love doing. And I think that that so many people can get trapped in that feeling of guilt where you end up wanting to do something that's better for you. It's like when I'm like, Okay, I'm gonna not gonna have sugar today, like for a week. I need to detox from it. I need to get away from it for a little bit.

Guilt doesn't help in any way. It doesn't fuel me to keep going. It stops me from doing something I know I actually love doing. And I think that that so many people can get trapped in that feeling of guilt where you end up wanting to do something that's better for you. It's like when I'm like, Okay, I'm gonna not gonna have sugar today, like for a week. I need to detox from it. I need to get away from it for a little bit.

And then I have one piece. I'm like, oh, well, then I just ruined all events.

And then I have one piece. I'm like, oh, well, then I just ruined all events.

I know.

I know.

Give yourself a bit of grace. It's fine.

Give yourself a bit of grace. It's fine.

It's not going back to the beginning. It's just stepping back and stepping forward again.

It's not going back to the beginning. It's just stepping back and stepping forward again.

Like it's not. You don't have to feel like you've failed or.

Like it's not. You don't have to feel like you've failed or.

Ruined everything by taking a break from something.

Ruined everything by taking a break from something.

Yeah, And in that, there is something to be said about being able to cross a finish line and be imperfect at the same time. And I think a lot of the times we are just conditioned to believe that crossing the finish line having been perfect is the only way to get there, and that's just not real. And so I think we can say, like, no, I got there. I still like and I tried, and how what I did was better than last week or better than yesterday.

Yeah, And in that, there is something to be said about being able to cross a finish line and be imperfect at the same time. And I think a lot of the times we are just conditioned to believe that crossing the finish line having been perfect is the only way to get there, and that's just not real. And so I think we can say, like, no, I got there. I still like and I tried, and how what I did was better than last week or better than yesterday.

And that's okay. And that's also life.

And that's okay. And that's also life.

That is our human condition, is that there is a day where we can wake up and we feel completely different than we did three days before, or something goes on, or you know, I was with a friend of mine who'd, like, you know, her her dad passed a month ago, and I remember she was on this kind of journey of like she wasn't having wine and she wasn't doing something because she was getting she's her body, she was preparing her body for something, and you know her dad passed and she's like, oh, no, I need it. I want a glass of wine now, like you know these and obviously that's a very extreme example, but these things do happen, and we have to allow ourselves to be human or have or do so that we can also like you know, know, what is the life affirming decision for us? Like sometimes you just have to have eaten that junkie thing one too many times for it.

That is our human condition, is that there is a day where we can wake up and we feel completely different than we did three days before, or something goes on, or you know, I was with a friend of mine who'd, like, you know, her her dad passed a month ago, and I remember she was on this kind of journey of like she wasn't having wine and she wasn't doing something because she was getting she's her body, she was preparing her body for something, and you know her dad passed and she's like, oh, no, I need it. I want a glass of wine now, like you know these and obviously that's a very extreme example, but these things do happen, and we have to allow ourselves to be human or have or do so that we can also like you know, know, what is the life affirming decision for us? Like sometimes you just have to have eaten that junkie thing one too many times for it.

To be like, no, I don't even want it anymore.

To be like, no, I don't even want it anymore.

Like I let myself have it like ten times and then it's just like I actually was, like I needed to happen until I didn't want it anymore, and then you don't even think about it. And I think we tend to become so kind of mentally attached to decisions we make around being well or happy or eating or all these things, when this idea that we give freedom, like you say, to our experiences around them, also gives us the free will to have discipline, so it's not like, oh, something dragged us and made us feel disciplined. And that's why I like the word to be disciplined rather than like obligated to or whatever, because then we, you know, we chose, and I think when you feel that you're not choosing because you're like I should, I should I should. Yeah, And it's like sometimes I'm like, I don't know, like hit rock bottom with it, like like have ordered the like you know, pad tie or like and it just have that indigestion one more time, like and because like your body will also just be like you can we can't do that now.

Like I let myself have it like ten times and then it's just like I actually was, like I needed to happen until I didn't want it anymore, and then you don't even think about it. And I think we tend to become so kind of mentally attached to decisions we make around being well or happy or eating or all these things, when this idea that we give freedom, like you say, to our experiences around them, also gives us the free will to have discipline, so it's not like, oh, something dragged us and made us feel disciplined. And that's why I like the word to be disciplined rather than like obligated to or whatever, because then we, you know, we chose, and I think when you feel that you're not choosing because you're like I should, I should I should. Yeah, And it's like sometimes I'm like, I don't know, like hit rock bottom with it, like like have ordered the like you know, pad tie or like and it just have that indigestion one more time, like and because like your body will also just be like you can we can't do that now.

Yeah, it is like that, you know.

Yeah, it is like that, you know.

And so I feel like being like a kid growing up in New Orleans, I remember it's like like I have like like drinking.

And so I feel like being like a kid growing up in New Orleans, I remember it's like like I have like like drinking.

Like whiskey or something like that.

Like whiskey or something like that.

Now I'm just like if I smell it, I'm like whoa, Like I can't even Like I'm like.

Now I'm just like if I smell it, I'm like whoa, Like I can't even Like I'm like.

I can't even you know. But it was because I was like out in high we'll sneaking into a bar like and.

I can't even you know. But it was because I was like out in high we'll sneaking into a bar like and.

You know, didn't know what I was doing and we were just psychotic. Yeah, but you know, you just or you'll like have had that thing one too many times and your body's like, okay, can we like get on a roll. And even again, that embodiment, having that attunement to sell it does create a harmony between our wants for ourselves and our ability to be in and have that and become those things.

You know, didn't know what I was doing and we were just psychotic. Yeah, but you know, you just or you'll like have had that thing one too many times and your body's like, okay, can we like get on a roll. And even again, that embodiment, having that attunement to sell it does create a harmony between our wants for ourselves and our ability to be in and have that and become those things.

Definitely, it does take a while to like we were saying, your body just gets trained to something, but it takes a while. It's not an instant thing of oh I started meditating, or I started eating salads and iver was amazing. Now, like it takes a while for your mind and your body to notice that this actually feels good for me, because at the beginning, it's discomfort. At the beginning, it's uncomfortable that, oh, you're swapping out that pizza slice and you're eating vegetables instead, Like why am I doing this? But eventually, when you you're right you have to, it's almost like you stick at it for a small amount of time and you notice that shift and that change in yourself, which hopefully then creates a new pattern or a new way of existing.

Definitely, it does take a while to like we were saying, your body just gets trained to something, but it takes a while. It's not an instant thing of oh I started meditating, or I started eating salads and iver was amazing. Now, like it takes a while for your mind and your body to notice that this actually feels good for me, because at the beginning, it's discomfort. At the beginning, it's uncomfortable that, oh, you're swapping out that pizza slice and you're eating vegetables instead, Like why am I doing this? But eventually, when you you're right you have to, it's almost like you stick at it for a small amount of time and you notice that shift and that change in yourself, which hopefully then creates a new pattern or a new way of existing.

And it's like we were talking about earlier, when you're like, if you just have happen, have an energized day. So then you commit to all these things and you're like, wait, hold on, I was just having a really like I was on a high that day of being like I'm feeling good. I'm feeling like I have a lot of capacity. And I think a lot of the times, whether it's about how we want to eat or what we want to do for ourselves to feel well and good, we have one like kind of released day where we're just like, oh, I am just into fruits and vegetables today, and so then you're like, oh my god, I am now.

And it's like we were talking about earlier, when you're like, if you just have happen, have an energized day. So then you commit to all these things and you're like, wait, hold on, I was just having a really like I was on a high that day of being like I'm feeling good. I'm feeling like I have a lot of capacity. And I think a lot of the times, whether it's about how we want to eat or what we want to do for ourselves to feel well and good, we have one like kind of released day where we're just like, oh, I am just into fruits and vegetables today, and so then you're like, oh my god, I am now.

This forever and da da da dah.

This forever and da da da dah.

And then there comes the judgment and the shame and the whatever when something comes around.

And then there comes the judgment and the shame and the whatever when something comes around.

When really we.

When really we.

Can say like wow, on any given day, like I know, I'm free to make these amazing decisions for my body and my health, and what can I do to detach from reasons why I would want them to be one way.

Can say like wow, on any given day, like I know, I'm free to make these amazing decisions for my body and my health, and what can I do to detach from reasons why I would want them to be one way.

Rather than another? And I think that's really important.

Rather than another? And I think that's really important.

I'm so that friend who at the beginning of like a Friday, I have all this time, I'm like, yeah, let's do this at night, let's do this, let's all hang out. I get to Midia, I'm like, why.

I'm so that friend who at the beginning of like a Friday, I have all this time, I'm like, yeah, let's do this at night, let's do this, let's all hang out. I get to Midia, I'm like, why.

Did I do that. Why did I just commit to all of that?

Did I do that. Why did I just commit to all of that?

I have no idea that friend waiting for your other friend to cancel before you do.

I have no idea that friend waiting for your other friend to cancel before you do.

That's always me.

That's always me.

Yes, You're like, in the relief of them canceling, you're like, oh.

Yes, You're like, in the relief of them canceling, you're like, oh.

Yeahs I you mentioned rock Button and it reminded me of something from your book where you speak about lostness, and I feel like I can I mean, I just keep saying this, but your book just felt like it was talking to me. But I felt that a lot of my life and I still go through waves of it. I think depending on what part of your life journey you go on, it's never just a onwards and upwards. It's always this ebb and flow of I feel like I've discovered something, and then you feel lost again. And then you feel like you've discovered something and then you feel lost again. What did lostness look like in your life?

Yeahs I you mentioned rock Button and it reminded me of something from your book where you speak about lostness, and I feel like I can I mean, I just keep saying this, but your book just felt like it was talking to me. But I felt that a lot of my life and I still go through waves of it. I think depending on what part of your life journey you go on, it's never just a onwards and upwards. It's always this ebb and flow of I feel like I've discovered something, and then you feel lost again. And then you feel like you've discovered something and then you feel lost again. What did lostness look like in your life?

Like?

Like?

How did you recognize the lostness in your life?

How did you recognize the lostness in your life?

I mean, I think there's micro moments of lostness where you could just have a day where you're disappointed and you're like, what's the point of everything?

I mean, I think there's micro moments of lostness where you could just have a day where you're disappointed and you're like, what's the point of everything?

Yeah? And I think people go through that daily.

Yeah? And I think people go through that daily.

I think there's macro lostness where people you know, finish one big goal, and because they're on the other side of that goal, they are now not really understanding how to like orient themselves to.

I think there's macro lostness where people you know, finish one big goal, and because they're on the other side of that goal, they are now not really understanding how to like orient themselves to.

What they want to be doing next.

What they want to be doing next.

I think big changes change us, and if we don't get to know ourselves again when we've had a big change, we often feel lost. And so I know I've felt that. I felt that when I moved to LA. I felt lost after I had my first kid, because.

I think big changes change us, and if we don't get to know ourselves again when we've had a big change, we often feel lost. And so I know I've felt that. I felt that when I moved to LA. I felt lost after I had my first kid, because.

So yourself, right, Yeah, well, and so much.

So yourself, right, Yeah, well, and so much.

Changes, and we have to really live in true observation of self and life when when big changes are happening. But a lot of the times we're just so busy trying to get through the change and do the next thing, or we're just busy, or we're grieving, or we're this, or we're that in this other emotional place that we just stop noticing. Yes, in the noticing and the observing is actually I think what's critical to us being able to kind of come home.

Changes, and we have to really live in true observation of self and life when when big changes are happening. But a lot of the times we're just so busy trying to get through the change and do the next thing, or we're just busy, or we're grieving, or we're this, or we're that in this other emotional place that we just stop noticing. Yes, in the noticing and the observing is actually I think what's critical to us being able to kind of come home.

To ourselves or steady ourselves, or feel.

To ourselves or steady ourselves, or feel.

Like, yes, everything around me could look different, but I am familiar to me.

Like, yes, everything around me could look different, but I am familiar to me.

Yes, I think when I think about my lostness, it was probably me doing again all these things externally and then suddenly it's me running after myself, trying to catch up with who I am, because suddenly I get to a point in my life where I haven't been doing the observation. I haven't been noticing the small shifts and changes I've been making, where I suddenly look at myself and.

Yes, I think when I think about my lostness, it was probably me doing again all these things externally and then suddenly it's me running after myself, trying to catch up with who I am, because suddenly I get to a point in my life where I haven't been doing the observation. I haven't been noticing the small shifts and changes I've been making, where I suddenly look at myself and.

I'm like, how did I even get who? How did I even get here? And who am I?

I'm like, how did I even get who? How did I even get here? And who am I?

Whether it's in a good way or a bad way, it's me trying to catch up with the version of myself that I suddenly find I am, And so I always imagine it as you know, you're just constantly lost, like running through the forest of your own heart, and you're trying to chug along with this person.

Whether it's in a good way or a bad way, it's me trying to catch up with the version of myself that I suddenly find I am, And so I always imagine it as you know, you're just constantly lost, like running through the forest of your own heart, and you're trying to chug along with this person.

Who's going at the speed of lightning. But suddenly you're you know, it.

Who's going at the speed of lightning. But suddenly you're you know, it.

Takes so much time to catch up with yourself if you're almost absent, you've been in darkness for such a long period where you haven't been checking in with yourself, and so it's almost like meeting someone. You've dated someone and then you meet them again in ten years time, you're like, you're a completely different person. And that's how I end up feeling about myself, where I've checked out from checking in with myself, and suddenly a year down the line'm like, oh wow, I haven't met you. Yeah, I need to get to know you again. Yeah.