Whine Down with Jana KramerJana is sitting down with her fiancé Allan and NOTHING is off limits!
Find out the biggest challenge they faced in their relationship so far and how they overcame it.
Things get spicy when the sex questions come out! But Allan won’t call it “sex”… and Jana reveals why!
Wind Down with Janet Kramer and I'm Heeart Radio podcast. Hey what's up.
It's Janna Kramer and we are recording live from Macy's in New York City. I have a very special guest on this week's Macy's Special Edition episode of wind Down with my amazing fiance, Alan Russell.
Yay, Hi Annie, Hello, how are you especially?
You are very special, very very very special. I am excited to be doing this episode with you from Macy's. Macy's is one of my favorite shops that I just I feel like it's one of those iconic stores that you know you're just going to be able to get everything you need in one place, for kids, for yourself, for I mean for the whole family. It's one of my favorite places that I always go to, especially during the holidays. It's like my one stop shop is at Macy's. I thought it would be fun for this episode to just kind of do a Q and a kind of of just chat between us, because I feel like there's so many questions that come in about you, about our relationship, and I thought, you know, what better place to do it in a place where it's you know, the homie. Macy's Vibe Homely Macy's, Vibe Homie Macy's, because like Macy's like as a home you know. So it's like, let's just make this a comfy, little cozy episode.
Yeah, okay, let's do it.
Let's do it. You want to start first, or let.
Me just pick a subject.
Yeah, let's pick a subject. Let's do it.
Okay, because you guys the one everyone listening and on Instagram, you guys submitted some questions. So we have a few questions that we kind of thought of last night while we were in New York on our little date night, and then I thought it'd be fun to obviously answer some questions from you guys.
Well, Macy's have kindly addressed you today.
They have Yeah, and you'll look great, Thank you, beb.
So let's start on maybe fashion.
Yeah, so this is interesting, so last night, thanks vib Wait to start out with that one. Last night when Alan and I were kind of going through the questions and we were trying to come up with some topics that maybe we could talk about, and one of the things he mentioned was fashion, and I was like, oh, yeah, like you love fashion. But what I didn't know is that you weren't quite a fan of my fashion.
No, that's not true. There's there's certain times where like look at look at you right now, like beautiful, elegant, and then those times were and it's.
Easy, easy, it's cute.
But you look like a female version of Eminem going at their battle wrap they heard up and the long loss hoodie and the long trousers and your little javonchie trainers.
No, wait, what did you say last night? He's like, you're like, I'm wearing two.
You got like your eleven dollar Amazon hoo and your nine dollars Amazon sportless joggles and your three thousand dollars Javon trainers.
So they're not three thousand, they're like three hundred and I bought them what ten years ago?
No, No, I can see that with a scuff marks.
So it's it's interesting to me because I never knew, well, I never thought that you thought I dressed like Eminem.
So that was quite the topic last night.
It's not it's you don't dress like it's just I look at you at times and I just I just laugh. I just laugh. I think it's I think it's an American thing. Well, I think people in America are the more, the more prone to casual dressing than what we are in the UK. Really yeah, I think so when you look at the average American.
Guy in America or in Scotland or in.
The American guy, I'm sorry, wow, okay, yes, thank you.
Baggy Nike, who the pair of jeans that are don't even fat properly in a pair of who care Hoka trainers, sneakers, the hookerka. I don't know how you pronounce it, different subject, but yeah, and that seems to be the staple of American fashion and what not for for not for everyone. I think there's more of a thres more of a look like you don't gathersh yeah.
And what is it verse versus the British Man? How do they because I guess I don't. I mean, well, okay, I'll say this. When I first met you, obviously you were in your peacoat and your turtleneck. And is you guys just care more of about the image.
Or I think it's just a culture of high address standards. I don't want to be pretty much as wow.
I mean, my mind is a semi blown right now because I I now I'm visioning my closet and I have, I would say eighty percent in our sweatshirts.
Old sweatshirts too.
Yeah, few days ago you had a Gianet Jackson, who the own?
What is wrong with Janet Jackson. Here's the thing.
I'm a mom of three now and so it's no but what I'm cozy. I've got to spit up on me one hundred percent of the day. So like, what is the point of work?
What would you like me to wear?
A sweetheart, I'm not complaining about your fashion that you just amuse me sometimes your choice of dress. That's all I'm saying.
I just like to be cozy. And I think in the era that I'm the mom era that I'm in, we're used to yoga pants and just comfy clothes and I and honestly, I don't have and I think a lot of people would think otherwise. I don't own a lot of clothing. I don't have like a lot of stuff. I really don't. I know, I I to do like my you know, I like to shop at times, but I don't really have a lot of clothes.
I think, to be fair that I'm talking about the kind of eminem battle wrap, but that's mostly airport attire for you. And part of that is because if we leave, if we're leaving the house, if it's an early flight and we're leaving the house at five thirty am, you set your alarm for five twenty five.
Absolutely, I only need five minutes whereas you need.
So one day I'm going to put I'm going to test you because I don't even think you look at the clothes that you lay out in the morning.
I'm going to replace them with even wasp clothes.
And then we're in the open, we're in the over the airport. You're then going to be like, oh no, what am I wearing? That's if we stuck with it.
Thanks Ben, You're so sweet to me. I love it.
Okay, moving on from fashion, Well, the good news is is I can get all my fashion tips from Macy's stylus that they have online. So maybe I should start relying more on their stylus portions.
Just look at the airport. Well, do you know what?
Actually, thank you. I have a great idea.
I should start a leisure where where it's like airport leisurewear, yeah, but stylish to Alan's liking, and it has not like a clothing standards.
It's Alan standards. How's that?
Okay?
Okay, sounds great. Okay.
I think a lot of people to have asked more about your background. Obviously you're from Scotland. Can you give the elevator ish pitch of your background and kind of how you got to where you're at today, because a.
Lot of people don't even know that. I don't think know that you played. I think they just know you as a coach.
That says a lot about my Kidia.
No, but I mean like Americans don't know. I mean ninety percent of people don't really follow soccer football.
Yeah, okay, well, I think I grew up in Glasgow and like every young British kid, I'm being coached on the distance of my make again, every young kid from the UK, but ninety nine percent want to be footballers. Grew up in Glasgow, played for the local professional team when I was younger, through the younger age groups Glasgow Rangers, and then was lucky enough to turn professional when I was sixteen, which a lot of people do that leave high school to go to be footballers. That was sixteen. Fast forward to the age of thirty thirty three and I was lucky enough that I didn't have a I didn't have an amazing playing career, but I was lucky enough to sustain it for seventeen eighteen years.
How many professional games did you play?
Six hundred and twenty, I.
Would say you had a really successful playing It's.
A lot of I mean, it's a lot of games. But my I mean, my highlights came as a as a coach as well I was playing. I obviously had developed the superior striker program that took me to a different that took me to a different level that as a coach that I hadn't played that it took me to the highest level when I was the England coach for five years and then assistant head coach at Alberdeen to then Norwich too. So now having just signed the new deal with Chicago Fire and the MLS to be to be their attacking coach. So it's a pretty yeah, my coaching career is a lot more interesting than my football career, of my actual playing career.
See, I think you're downplaying it because there's not many people that can say they played professionally that many games for that long and sustained it that long. I mean, you're in that one percent less then.
Yeah, that's true, So but it was insignificant compared to the level of.
Coaching, right right, I mean, but again, when you look at it, you've had a very successful career.
I sustained that for many years, which was just not easy.
Did you always did you want to live in America like when you met me? Well, before you met me, was your dream to stay in the UK?
Or did you have desires to want to move to America?
Well? I knew that I wanted to finish my playing career in America, which is why I came out to the US in twenty ten, and I spent the last four or five years in my career finishing off my career here, and that was always something I wanted to do. Like in the US, it's less of a grind, there's less pressure, less stress. The fan the fans are completely different. So it was a nice way to cap off and finish my career in a good introduction into the detail of coaching because in the UK I wouldn't have been able to play and coach at the same time, whereas out here I was able to finish my career but also develop the coaching pro So I pretty much did what I wanted to do, which was finished my career in the US.
Well, we met when you were living in so when you were working in Norwich. What was your kind of thought then, Like did you always, like you said, want to come back to the to the to America and live.
Yeah, I like part of me feels at home in America and I left in two thousand. All the cheese, yeah, every really got cheese. I'm trying to think of something that I looked at a few days ago and it had cheese on it, and I'm thinking, only in America would they put cheese in this. It was like a chocolate bar or something. Anyway, Yeah, I feel at home in the US, which is why I moved twenty fifteen back to England. Spent eight years seven eight years back there. But I was having I've always had the ch to come back. When I was at phase in my video where it just kind of all fail into place and it was it looked like a different a different challenge, and then I met and I met you and the timement was the tamement was perfect.
I remember one of our text messages that we had together in the very beginning, I said, what's going to happen when you fall madly in love for an American girl? And your response was, what's going to happen when you fall for you know, a British or Scottish Scottish fan. I always feel like in that moment we were in trouble.
We were in trouble at the moment we met yourself.
Let's move to some of the questions from fans. What was this maybe you can go on? Is just something that you just talked about. What has been one of the biggest hurdles we've faced together and how did we overcome it?
One of the biggest held those.
Which I almost want to say too before we even get that question for this, and you know, hopefully, you know, one day we can do something together and you'll be able to come back and you know, and we'll be able to do podcasts together. What I never wanted to turn into is how the last podcast that I had was with the former guests, because I never wanted to be a I never want us to go well, first of all, I don't I don't think we would ever have those issues to ever talk about on air. But I don't think I think there's certain things where you just shouldn't talk about too on a public platform. You know, I learned my lesson deeply. But I also when I look at this question, I'm like, yeah, of course we faced hurdles, but it hasn't been the explosive of things that I've personally dealt with in my past, which also shows me how different this is.
Okay, does that make sense?
So I think it's like fine to answer these questions because it's not. This is just a normal thing that most people go through. What I would never have again is like oh us debating, how I debated, you know, and how oh I wouldn't either. I mean, lesson was the biggest lesson ever and have some regrets around all that, even though we did certain help certain people.
But well, well, these questions we're going to have to kind of shure a little bit of our private lives. But it's not it's not a discussion on conflict or arguments.
But I think back though, and it's like, yeah, we've had hurdles, but I don't we haven't had the what at least I've ever been used to fights. We get annoyed at times, and I think, you know, if you want to talk about one of the hurdles.
But one of the hot thoughs would probably be like maybe the Chicago discussion. What was that two months ago? Now? Yeah, yeah, that was that dragged on for a few days and it was pretty January. Yeah yeah, I mean, I don't know how how to start. Obviously, I got offered the contract and I would have been six days a week in Chicago, which I've got, I've got something inside me where my comfort zone is on this football field soccer field, and I could have been back in that six days a week. So I think it was. It was. It was a big huddle that we had to discuss for days and days and days because it was an opportunity that could have been good for me, but it wasn't. It wasn't quite a thing. In the cold light of day after the days of discussion, I think it's good that we got to a place where there was upset, that was anguish, there was what we came out of it, like, Okay, you've said what you need to say. I've said that I need to say. We both know each other better now when it comes to situations like this, and I think I knew that particular role at that particular time wasn't the right thing for everyone, for you, for the kids, for Troy, everyone. So there was and we'll have other hurdles, but this one was. Yeah, the days and days it took for us to get to that decision and that outcome will will always probably refer back to that because it was tough because we could have been separated for twenty five days of the month or twenty four.
Days of the month for ten to eleven, and I.
Could have resorted to type and put my career before others, but I just didn't feel it was right to do it this thing. So I think we got to know each other better on that, and I think we've both evolved as as people as well as a as a couple.
Yeah, I almost feel like I want to say something because I want how do I say this? Like I want to be like what I didn't say, he couldn't do it. I think so many times in the past where yes, I was controlling with my past relationship because I was so afraid of it falling apart that I controlled way more than obviously I should, because I thought controlling would be able to control the outcome of things, which I know now that's just not the case at all, having control only deteriorates yourself and then off obviously the relationship too. And so with the Chicago thing, I think it was more just putting it all on the table, Okay, what does this really look like, because it was something that we had not faced as a couple and with a two month old baby and and you know, having my children, and how I was like, for me, it's it was just like, how do we how do we make this work as a family while also making sure that you you have the career that you want, and is this the role that we sacrifice? And you know, we try to move the kids and I was looking at private schools in Chicago for the kids. So for me, it was always like, we have to keep the family intact to make this work.
Yeah, I think the big the biggest remainder for me of that time was you said to me, And it was really important because I knew you would, deep down you would support whatever I decided, and I know that you didn't want to control my decision, but at the time you said to me, a lesson. If that's is the one, if that is the role that we sacrificed for, then let's do it, let's go all and and let's do it. So I knew I had just support which helped me ultimately. It was it was a family. It was a discussion between us, but the decision was on me, my career and my like So there was there was a bit of pressure on there, but the pressure was taken away by you saying, Okay, if it's the right role, then we'd do it. But deep down that particular role, I knew it wasn't the right one.
Because he was assistant head coach.
Yeah, it was the it was the It was it was something that I've done already. It was a sideway step just to get back in and I knew it wasn't right and I knew it wasn't where I wanted to be, so therefore it was the right decision for So was.
It the fact, and I think this is important too, So was it the fact that I said, if this is the one, like you know, because I remember I'm like, okay, here's here's the one private school, Here's what I was going to present to Mike here, and in which we did talk to him like I'm like, here's all the things. And that's was it? Having the support that. Oh, I know, I said other things all the time. Was was it having the support? Is that what you ultimately helped you feel comfortable with the decision.
Yeah. Yeah. I think when you don't feel like someone has your back, or you don't feel like someone can see it from your viewpoint, then you tend to be more selfish real decision making because you feel you're not being heldy, you're not being seen, your side is not being considered than you that you had considered everything on my side, and I'd considered everything on your side, and it was just it was just the right things to do.
So and I look forward to you know, I've obviously after Art we had a private discussion with Mike and so I and I've now had since another one because I'm excited to support that opportunity when it's the right role, you know, and so I trying to make that work with a blended family, you know, with.
You know, making sure that.
Mike has seized the kids, you see your you know, so it's it's it's just important, Like I think the I think what was hard and what was the hurdle for me on that was the and we needed like three days to make the decision. So it was like, okay, how do we with a two month old? Like it was the it was the very fast, you know, and me calling my ex going, hey, I'm going to take the kids to Chicago for these many months and then this that, and I mean I think we all just kind of had our heads. It was like the whole kind of world like shifted upside down and we all needed a beat. So I feel like now we're more equipped for when that opportunity does come up, because you deserve that opportunity and we're all kind of, I think, on the same page now.
Yeah, and the current rule FETs because I'm there once twice a week and it works for everyone. Yeah, I get to be home, I get to go and see Troy, and yeah, I get to do other things. So it's perfect.
Yeah, let's move on to.
Alyssa.
How has sex changed for you both after having Romano Jucy. I will say, on the one side of things, obviously after having a baby or little I was.
At least a little self conscious.
But I have never felt more beautiful ever in those situations than I have with you, because you just make me feel beautiful, whether I'm just had a baby or or I look like I'm eminem in a battle wrap.
Like I.
Think, if anything, I'm I don't think anything's really changed. I think it's obviously I've gone through feelings of not feeling good about my body and like that transition. But you've always made me feel amazing.
Yeah, that's because you are amazing, like every part of you, I think, I mean, it was, it was incredible to begin with. I think it's it's better. It's even better now because we've become closer, because we've created a little human meat ball together a big meatball. So yeah, I think bond the love everything's hescned since since Roman has been born, and therefore that shows in the and the sexual and the sexual side of things.
And on that same topic from samar how many times a week do you guys have sex?
You know?
I love about you guys is how personal and how you just like there's certain questions where you are like why do people care or like or how personal people really do get?
Yeah, there's some questions that you should and I'm like, one, do they think you're actually going to answer that? And too, why do they want to know this? I mean, how old are they that they don't know stuff like this. Going back to the question, it's Samia, how many times a week do we have sex? The only things we don't have all the times were with traveling. I mean every every day we're together.
We it's a good sex life. I mean we'll just we'll just go with that. It's about every day.
And I don't really we don't really call it sex, do we?
No, we don't.
What do we call it?
It's the balance thing. He's like, Babe, we don't have sex. We make love. And I'm like, oh, it's so cute. Okay, it's for Alan. What is Jenna's favorite movie?
Oh?
When is this question?
This question from Jacqueline? Who's for Alan? What is Jenna's favorite movies?
Flipping back and forth, I can't follow you.
Oh, here we go? What is Rance fair movie show? She has? Start in?
Oh?
Shit? Started?
Okay, I didn't finished the question.
M I don't know. I'm probably gonna go. There's a click with Adam Sandler.
He's my favorite celebrity I've ever worked with. But my favorite show I've ever been in was Friday Night Lights. Do you know what that show is?
Yeah?
Yeah, what's it about.
The high school football's football players. Right, Yeah, yeah, I think I watched ten minutes of it.
Have you still never watched an episode of onunchre Hill?
No? Not one.
Yeah, this is interesting because how do you keep the spice alive in your relationship? Going through a dry spell with my significant other, I think he had a date the person, and I think that's.
One thing be there really well, as we at least at least once or twice a month, we we bring the babysitter around. Do you call the babysitters? Yeah, bring the babysitter and we again, but we go downtown, we have a meal, We have a proper date every couple of weeks. I mean, we do a lot together in all honesty, but we make a point of always making the effort to date each other, make each other feel feel special. I mean the question about a dry spell is why why is it a dry spell? What you both do and that makes it? Do you not feel like dry? I mean if it's a spell, then it's obviously gone up and down. And what makes it?
Sorry no, I just whenly said what makes it dry? As I just went a little sexual on.
It, as your mind normally does. Yeah, I think you make me feel loved, and I make you feel loved, and I make you feel attractive, and so therefore we don't. It's difficult because we've not had a dry spell.
Yeah, but again, I think it's one of those things where you just if you date each other, you make the effort, make the effort to. Sometimes I don't want to, but I I do. I'm tired anyways, Arlette. What annoying habits does the other person have that drive you crazy?
Probably, and that's a good thing. The two different people when it comes to schedule, and I'm more do it when it needs done, your more planet four years in advance, and put it on the calendar.
Four years in advance, I mean the week before, so I can just know what is going on that week so we can make sure we have help that week since we don't have an any and if we have conflicting schedules. And my most annoying habit with you is.
That you.
Are either a always late, and I do not being I like to be early. I think early is on time. And there was the scheduling. Ka, well no, not anymore because I give you a fake time. But it's it's they would say. The scheduling because you just you don't know, and so i'm I'm when I'm trying to jigsaw everything together. It can be frustrating at times.
I think it's I've not necessarily needed it so much in my life up until this point where I look at my eye calendar so much. I mean, I look at your eye calander and it's like, okay, it makes my eyes hot. So then, but because we've got I've got go back to see Troy, We've got we've got our own travel, We've got Rome and the kids to get to school. We've got Chicago consider that things a week, We've got your movie that's coming up. I think now it's so important that the schedules are in place.
Yeah, and I would like to plan our honeymoon. I know it's the end of March. We're maybe going in July. Like I think it's you know, time to maybe schedule it, you.
Know, yeah, yeah, but there's things like a bit of what you're doing on this day in May? And I'm like, actually serious, what am I doing on this day in May?
I asked me to begin the May and I'll tell.
You right, But it's like, hey, we've got to go to Paris for you know something, so I need to It's not just like little things.
Oh it's fine, okay.
From Lynn Alan, how would you describe your relationship with Julian jas Are you comfortable disciplining them?
My relationship with Julian Jays, I mean.
I think it's so special.
Yeah, they're there, so they're easy kids there, well mannered, the polite, the the soft. They don't throw tantrums. There's there's I mean, you've it's a credit to you and how you've brought them up really because they're respectful and kind and they're easy. And Mike also how he's brought them up. But they're just so easy to to be around. I mean those times where if they crossed the line a little bit with you then and naturally I have to step in and slightly raise my voice, but and not it's not even discipline them because they don't really need disciplined.
It's more just corrections, like what you had to correct Rol the other day, which I thought was because I kind of looked at you like, all right, here's your he's she's testing you to see what you're going to do because you asked her to do something. She didn't do it, and then I just kind of looked back. I'm like, this is on you, this is you know, she's and I think it's important how you it's it's great how you've stepped in to obviously that role and and you know, the kids listen to you and you help them, like, hey, this is not how you don't leave this stuff sitting in the sink or you don't even turn the light offer and you know, they they know now to you know, I mean they call you that.
And so I think we've got a house We've got a household where like respect for each other as the highest thing, and I think it's what we always say with our relationship. But I think the householders run easily because everybody respects the rules, the boundaries, and everyone's relationship.
Agreed.
The biggest parenting concept you disagree on.
Concept Molly Coddling.
Mm hmmm, yeah, okay, I'm not even a defend.
You're right, yeah, I don't. This is what happens when you grew up in Glasgow in the eighties. Empathy and softness. I'm not even in the dictionary, so I've had to learn a lot about that. But I think I think you Molly Coddle Jesse at times, and I don't agree with it, and I tell you that there's a lot of times he'll say, Alan, can you do this? So can you help me with that? And I'm like, no, do it yourself. Do it yourself because he needs to learn, and you're like, I'll do that. Come here, I'll do it. Like It's actually funny with the smoothie the other day because if I make something that doesn't eat it, I'm like, okay, well you're not getting in else you like that, you just choose not to eat it because you've eaten it before. And they're like with he smoothie, if he doesn't like it, I will not make him another smoothie because he drinks it most mornings where you're like, oh do you want banana in there? Do you want a bit of extra this? And I'm like, don't Molly Gordland let him drink it. So, yeah, I disagree with that. It's not a big thing, but yeah, I do disagree with one things.
From Phoebe One did Alan know Jane was the one? I like that question.
As soon as I met you, and I know it's cliche and it's it can be a little bit cheesy and over used at times, but I did. I did. I phoned my brother a few hours after and said that I'm in trouble. Yeah, bro, this one is. She's got me. So I think as soon as I met you, and we'd spoken a lot beforehand and FaceTime stop it, as soon as I met you, I knew it would be together from that point.
I mean, you called it all.
You said, we're going to get married, We're going to have a kid, We're gonna Yeah, all happened. Well, thank you for coming on being my guest. I appreciate you. I love you.
And how about we get married in a couple months.
What do you say, can't wait?
You're ready?
Yeah?
All right?
Thank you.
Big shout out to Macy's for having us. And if you need literally anything, go shop at Macy's because it is the best store, one stop shop to get everything you need. And definitely come visit their West thirty fourth Street store in New York because it is fantastic.
See you later, Hi,
