Oh, hello, and welcome to true Romance. This is Carolina Barlow. This is devn le Re. Okay, I know all of you have been at the edge of your friggin seats all week thinking Carolina went to coffee with a man with a man? Wait she freakin do? Did she faint? Did she pass out? Did she throw up all over the table?

Oh, hello, and welcome to true Romance. This is Carolina Barlow. This is devn le Re. Okay, I know all of you have been at the edge of your friggin seats all week thinking Carolina went to coffee with a man with a man? Wait she freakin do? Did she faint? Did she pass out? Did she throw up all over the table?

She actually just projectile vomited?

She actually just projectile vomited?

Did she stand up like the original Exorcist and pissed in the middle of the floor with her legs you know, which is something I've definitely thought about doing.

Did she stand up like the original Exorcist and pissed in the middle of the floor with her legs you know, which is something I've definitely thought about doing.

But it's really good attention getting behavior. Yes, it's like, hey, mom, I know you're partying with your priest and all your little friends, but guess.

But it's really good attention getting behavior. Yes, it's like, hey, mom, I know you're partying with your priest and all your little friends, but guess.

What, I'm the girl that's impossible to forget.

What, I'm the girl that's impossible to forget.

Love that, and so I'm sorry.

Love that, and so I'm sorry.

Just one quick thing, if you like the jokes about the Exorcist, I have a substack called for the drama dot substack dot com, and I wrote about the Exorcist.

Just one quick thing, if you like the jokes about the Exorcist, I have a substack called for the drama dot substack dot com, and I wrote about the Exorcist.

Okay, moving on, okay.

Okay, moving on, okay.

Plug, moving on. I had coffee with a man, like I said, like I teased in the last episode, and I was shaking. I was physically shaking. There was even a moment like when I arrived where we saw each other like a block away because he was sitting outside, so he stood up and we were just walking towards each other for like a block and I was like, this is hell. This is my idea of hell. This is so scary, this is so awkward. And then we had a totally normal coffee like what I was expecting was like sparks mystery, like okay, let's get out of here, like wait, and it was totally benign. It was like just fine, and I think I really needed it because, like I said, I was shaking almost the entire coffee. I like didn't know where to put my hands. I was just I was a wreck, and so clearly I needed to do this because I need practice. I need to just do this. And like obviously my hand was wrapped and I was like I did like therapy over like he's gonna notice my hand.

Plug, moving on. I had coffee with a man, like I said, like I teased in the last episode, and I was shaking. I was physically shaking. There was even a moment like when I arrived where we saw each other like a block away because he was sitting outside, so he stood up and we were just walking towards each other for like a block and I was like, this is hell. This is my idea of hell. This is so scary, this is so awkward. And then we had a totally normal coffee like what I was expecting was like sparks mystery, like okay, let's get out of here, like wait, and it was totally benign. It was like just fine, and I think I really needed it because, like I said, I was shaking almost the entire coffee. I like didn't know where to put my hands. I was just I was a wreck, and so clearly I needed to do this because I need practice. I need to just do this. And like obviously my hand was wrapped and I was like I did like therapy over like he's gonna notice my hand.

And like like I think it's weird that like I.

And like like I think it's weird that like I.

Cover my like scar on my hand. And he mentioned that he had had surgery recently, and I was like, oh, well, I had surgery this year and left it on my hand. He was like, oh, I didn't even notice that. And I needed that as well to just be like, people aren't always just staring at me, you know, or as my therapist said, like sometimes people notice things because that's what our brain is registered to do, is to notice differences. And she was like, do you think that people could notice it out of empathy? Which did not is not my first thought.

Cover my like scar on my hand. And he mentioned that he had had surgery recently, and I was like, oh, well, I had surgery this year and left it on my hand. He was like, oh, I didn't even notice that. And I needed that as well to just be like, people aren't always just staring at me, you know, or as my therapist said, like sometimes people notice things because that's what our brain is registered to do, is to notice differences. And she was like, do you think that people could notice it out of empathy? Which did not is not my first thought.

Because yeah, that's really interesting.

Because yeah, that's really interesting.

But again, just really for anyone who is struggling to go on a date or just terrified of it, I'm really glad I did it. I feel like it's going to be okay. The next one is going to feel easier. That's how I should say it. I feel like the next one's going to be easier. And the part of me that feels kind of sad from it is the part of me that was like I remember meeting like my ex and like people that I immediately felt like, whoa, this is something like that feeling of like this is something exciting, and you leave wherever you met this person being like wait, wait, I'm charged, like I have to find out more about them now. This is a situation like I've got to get info, I've got to like source my friends and talk about what next steps to do. And I didn't feel that way, and I just realized how rare it is to feel that way.

But again, just really for anyone who is struggling to go on a date or just terrified of it, I'm really glad I did it. I feel like it's going to be okay. The next one is going to feel easier. That's how I should say it. I feel like the next one's going to be easier. And the part of me that feels kind of sad from it is the part of me that was like I remember meeting like my ex and like people that I immediately felt like, whoa, this is something like that feeling of like this is something exciting, and you leave wherever you met this person being like wait, wait, I'm charged, like I have to find out more about them now. This is a situation like I've got to get info, I've got to like source my friends and talk about what next steps to do. And I didn't feel that way, and I just realized how rare it is to feel that way.

It's rare to feel that way, and it's rare for like to feel that way, and then.

It's rare to feel that way, and it's rare for like to feel that way, and then.

Like it actually lasts like that's something from my summer of dating, Summer of.

Like it actually lasts like that's something from my summer of dating, Summer of.

Hell, summer of pretty, the summer I thought I was pretty but turns out fringing not.

Hell, summer of pretty, the summer I thought I was pretty but turns out fringing not.

No, but I am really pretty.

No, but I am really pretty.

But no, actually, you guys, this is an auditory experience.

But no, actually, you guys, this is an auditory experience.

But you guys, you said, know, like I'm.

But you guys, you said, know, like I'm.

Pretty, Like I actually hung out with my friend's sister for the first time, and like sometimes I like.

Pretty, Like I actually hung out with my friend's sister for the first time, and like sometimes I like.

Do stuff and try to have sex with you.

Do stuff and try to have sex with you.

No, but I'm like sometimes I do stuff where I like am like, oh yeah, I have like serious mental illness and like that's not normal, Like because I was like, oh, did your sister have fun? Oh and by the way, did she say anything about how I looked? Yeah, and She's like, yeah, she thinks you're pretty. I was like, okay, got it, Okay, goe anyway, I'm like not well, but I was just going to say yeah. I In my summer of dating, I had like multiple like mini moments of like wait, this is something like wait, this date is going by really fast, like oh my god. We're like, oh my god, what like this is the amount of times I've been like this is like my person, and then like two later or like one date later, you're like, oh, that's actually nothing.

No, but I'm like sometimes I do stuff where I like am like, oh yeah, I have like serious mental illness and like that's not normal, Like because I was like, oh, did your sister have fun? Oh and by the way, did she say anything about how I looked? Yeah, and She's like, yeah, she thinks you're pretty. I was like, okay, got it, Okay, goe anyway, I'm like not well, but I was just going to say yeah. I In my summer of dating, I had like multiple like mini moments of like wait, this is something like wait, this date is going by really fast, like oh my god. We're like, oh my god, what like this is the amount of times I've been like this is like my person, and then like two later or like one date later, you're like, oh, that's actually nothing.

But I think it makes you more resilient the more you do it.

But I think it makes you more resilient the more you do it.

Yeah, Like I genuinely feel like that now where I'm like, Okay, I have no expectation.

Yeah, Like I genuinely feel like that now where I'm like, Okay, I have no expectation.

I'm like, I'll go if I don't like that.

I'm like, I'll go if I don't like that.

My biggest thing is like, now if I don't like the person, I'm getting up after like twenty to thirty minutes, because I'm just not going to waste my time totally. Yeah, it is like I definitely in the beginning, was I waste their time?

My biggest thing is like, now if I don't like the person, I'm getting up after like twenty to thirty minutes, because I'm just not going to waste my time totally. Yeah, it is like I definitely in the beginning, was I waste their time?

Yeah?

Yeah?

But yeah, exactly like I wouldn't want to be sitting across That's what I tell myself. I wouldn't want to be sitting across from someone who doesn't want to actually be here. That being said, if someone I want to date with ever after twenty minutes is like I'm actually gonna go, I'll probably like sob and have to do like trying yeah over it.

But yeah, exactly like I wouldn't want to be sitting across That's what I tell myself. I wouldn't want to be sitting across from someone who doesn't want to actually be here. That being said, if someone I want to date with ever after twenty minutes is like I'm actually gonna go, I'll probably like sob and have to do like trying yeah over it.

That's gonna be an amdr session for sure.

That's gonna be an amdr session for sure.

But I'm a sensitive ass bitch.

But I'm a sensitive ass bitch.

But anyway, the point is to just say, I think the more you date, the more it like it sucks, because it's like the more you date, the more it sucks, but it's also the more it's helpful. And then that's like the only way to actually find someone.

But anyway, the point is to just say, I think the more you date, the more it like it sucks, because it's like the more you date, the more it sucks, but it's also the more it's helpful. And then that's like the only way to actually find someone.

Yeah, dating does seem to be the way to find someone, Unfortunately, not the way that I think I'm going to find someone, which is someone realizes they are in love with me after meeting me for five seconds and then invites me into their home to live there, which has been my current plan. I'm like, you're gonna fall in love with me, ask me to move in, and we'll get married within three months, and I don't have to get to know you or do the any the beginning conversation.

Yeah, dating does seem to be the way to find someone, Unfortunately, not the way that I think I'm going to find someone, which is someone realizes they are in love with me after meeting me for five seconds and then invites me into their home to live there, which has been my current plan. I'm like, you're gonna fall in love with me, ask me to move in, and we'll get married within three months, and I don't have to get to know you or do the any the beginning conversation.

I know the conversation, and this is what kills me. That's a Chelsea pretty joke. By the way, I didn't want to say it was fine, Okay, thanks for clarifying. I actually wanted to say, what's up with that? And I'm just kidding. That's a Jerry Seinfel joke. The thing that is so annoying to me about dating, it's like, first of all this start, the starting out with once a week. And by the way, I know now from my two different therapies that I'm in like that I need to take things slow physically with people especially. But still it's like the one, all right, we we met for our first day on a Thursday. It's going, well, how's next Thursday. I'm like, next Thursday, Thursday, I won't even know who I am. Next Thursday, I'll remember your name, but I'll be I could be a Trump supporter next Thursday, like I don't know.

I know the conversation, and this is what kills me. That's a Chelsea pretty joke. By the way, I didn't want to say it was fine, Okay, thanks for clarifying. I actually wanted to say, what's up with that? And I'm just kidding. That's a Jerry Seinfel joke. The thing that is so annoying to me about dating, it's like, first of all this start, the starting out with once a week. And by the way, I know now from my two different therapies that I'm in like that I need to take things slow physically with people especially. But still it's like the one, all right, we we met for our first day on a Thursday. It's going, well, how's next Thursday. I'm like, next Thursday, Thursday, I won't even know who I am. Next Thursday, I'll remember your name, but I'll be I could be a Trump supporter next Thursday, like I don't know.

And then like the waiting, and then this is the other thing.

And then like the waiting, and then this is the other thing.

They'll like meeting in uncomfortable situations like, oh, let's go to a park this time, sit on a bench.

They'll like meeting in uncomfortable situations like, oh, let's go to a park this time, sit on a bench.

I'm like, can we go to your house and sit on the couch.

I'm like, can we go to your house and sit on the couch.

We don't have to touch, we don't have to kiss, but I just want to be on someone's sectional, you know, Like is that my to be on your sectional?

We don't have to touch, we don't have to kiss, but I just want to be on someone's sectional, you know, Like is that my to be on your sectional?

And then we talk about whatever we want.

And then we talk about whatever we want.

I'm cozy, I'm laying down, I got a blanket on, Like that's my ideal.

I'm cozy, I'm laying down, I got a blanket on, Like that's my ideal.

Date and we don't have to even kiss.

Date and we don't have to even kiss.

But it's so true.

But it's so true.

Yeah, it's like the oh, let's go on a food tour. I'm like, I am tired.

Yeah, it's like the oh, let's go on a food tour. I'm like, I am tired.

And I got in my life at a food festival and I was there for three hours and we just didn't know how to end the date clearly and it was awful.

And I got in my life at a food festival and I was there for three hours and we just didn't know how to end the date clearly and it was awful.

Well, okay, this.

Well, okay, this.

Is an interesting thing too, because people are anti dinner for a first date. But I say, dinner can actually go faster than drinks because if you just order one course, it's like, all right, that's one hour.

Is an interesting thing too, because people are anti dinner for a first date. But I say, dinner can actually go faster than drinks because if you just order one course, it's like, all right, that's one hour.

But with drinks, it's like, oh, do we get another one? Do we do this? I think I'm going to get another one? What do you?

But with drinks, it's like, oh, do we get another one? Do we do this? I think I'm going to get another one? What do you?

It's like, oh my god, like how long are we going to be here? But the other thing is like realizing my age. They're expecting us to sit on stools, They're expecting us to sit on benches. That hurts my necks, that hurts my back. I can't be doing that. Like that's another thing. I'm like, I'm not really built for this whole. Like, yeah, I'm gonna sit on a fucking grass patch with you anymore?

It's like, oh my god, like how long are we going to be here? But the other thing is like realizing my age. They're expecting us to sit on stools, They're expecting us to sit on benches. That hurts my necks, that hurts my back. I can't be doing that. Like that's another thing. I'm like, I'm not really built for this whole. Like, yeah, I'm gonna sit on a fucking grass patch with you anymore?

No, no, no, no no no. I would literally get up and say I would rather be at a bouncy house. I would rather be in a children's birthday party than here. In Central Park on a blanket with you, stranger, I will stranger.

No, no, no, no no no. I would literally get up and say I would rather be at a bouncy house. I would rather be in a children's birthday party than here. In Central Park on a blanket with you, stranger, I will stranger.

There is someone that I have a huge crush on that I've been on a few dates with. And the reason I knew I had a huge crush on them is because they're like, I'm actually going to this lecture if you wanted to come, and I.

There is someone that I have a huge crush on that I've been on a few dates with. And the reason I knew I had a huge crush on them is because they're like, I'm actually going to this lecture if you wanted to come, and I.

Was like, oh, totally for sure. But then the lecture was sold out.

Was like, oh, totally for sure. But then the lecture was sold out.

Ah, so sad, too bad, So sad?

Ah, so sad, too bad, So sad?

I speaking of a park bench date, Yeah, sad to say, but that is where Olivia and Rod had their date.

I speaking of a park bench date, Yeah, sad to say, but that is where Olivia and Rod had their date.

Yes, we've been watching Southern Charm. This season is actually very good.

Yes, we've been watching Southern Charm. This season is actually very good.

Fascinating dynamics, fascinating, great dynamics, great couple dynamics, or X's dynamics.

Fascinating dynamics, fascinating, great dynamics, great couple dynamics, or X's dynamics.

I don't even know where to start. Obviously, it's been a really sad uh. The last episode was incredibly sad, with Olivia's brother unexpectedly passing.

I don't even know where to start. Obviously, it's been a really sad uh. The last episode was incredibly sad, with Olivia's brother unexpectedly passing.

But let's start with Shep's dog in the hospital.

But let's start with Shep's dog in the hospital.

So Shep is the man who has broken so many hearts, has hurt so many people, and one of the times you see him most emotional is when his French bulldog has a fever. I was very attracted to this man exactly me too.

So Shep is the man who has broken so many hearts, has hurt so many people, and one of the times you see him most emotional is when his French bulldog has a fever. I was very attracted to this man exactly me too.

I was gonna say that the first time I've been attracted to him.

I was gonna say that the first time I've been attracted to him.

I just thought, we understand each other. You understand, you appreciate all things. You'd probably destroy my life by the same time we would bond over, you know, our love of you know, giving dogs a bath. He seems to be apathetic towards his ex tailor, except when she is seen playing with his dog and he breaks into tears. And I would probably get back together with a man have like if that had happened, I probably look at him and say, Okay, let's talk. Let's build our family back again. Because even if you cheat on me with every single girl in Texas, I am very and I've said this on this podcast before I tracked it to men crying. It's just something that really gets me excited. And seeing shep cry each time he gets emotional, I think I should have sex with this man. And by the way, I slid into his DMS. Okay, Like, it's not like I haven't tried.

I just thought, we understand each other. You understand, you appreciate all things. You'd probably destroy my life by the same time we would bond over, you know, our love of you know, giving dogs a bath. He seems to be apathetic towards his ex tailor, except when she is seen playing with his dog and he breaks into tears. And I would probably get back together with a man have like if that had happened, I probably look at him and say, Okay, let's talk. Let's build our family back again. Because even if you cheat on me with every single girl in Texas, I am very and I've said this on this podcast before I tracked it to men crying. It's just something that really gets me excited. And seeing shep cry each time he gets emotional, I think I should have sex with this man. And by the way, I slid into his DMS. Okay, Like, it's not like I haven't tried.

I've slid into Rod's DMS. Not a single response.

I've slid into Rod's DMS. Not a single response.

We're waiting, but Rod, like I.

We're waiting, but Rod, like I.

Feel like maybe he's trying to play it cool, like pretend he's still with Taylor, I mean, sorry, with Olivia during the season, I'm like, oh, it's not about me. He's actually doing something for his job, which is being on reality TV.

Feel like maybe he's trying to play it cool, like pretend he's still with Taylor, I mean, sorry, with Olivia during the season, I'm like, oh, it's not about me. He's actually doing something for his job, which is being on reality TV.

But I was.

But I was.

Gonna say that I wouldn't have had that control like Taylor played it so cool where Shep's crying over her petting the dog and she's just like you, Okay. I would have been like, do you want to go to my parents' house and ask them if you can have my hand in marriage? Surely no, But Shep crying about his dog like that really got me.

Gonna say that I wouldn't have had that control like Taylor played it so cool where Shep's crying over her petting the dog and she's just like you, Okay. I would have been like, do you want to go to my parents' house and ask them if you can have my hand in marriage? Surely no, But Shep crying about his dog like that really got me.

I think, like, it's interesting. Okay.

I think, like, it's interesting. Okay.

This is what's interesting about this season is like the dynamics of straightmen is coming out and being studied in an interesting way, which is all thanks to Olivia and Taylor starting the season by being like, what's wrong with these avoidant men? Like both Austin and Shep had seemingly won the lottery had beautiful interesting. I mean I would say, okay, well.

This is what's interesting about this season is like the dynamics of straightmen is coming out and being studied in an interesting way, which is all thanks to Olivia and Taylor starting the season by being like, what's wrong with these avoidant men? Like both Austin and Shep had seemingly won the lottery had beautiful interesting. I mean I would say, okay, well.

Specifically Austin does seem to be missing and I'm sorry to say half a brain, like she is slow as molasses. She looks just vacant as all.

Specifically Austin does seem to be missing and I'm sorry to say half a brain, like she is slow as molasses. She looks just vacant as all.

Hell.

Hell.

Well, I really think Olivia is like cool, smart, Olivia's really attractive, like she's every like emotionally dynamic. At least Taylor is, like clearly, I think I think Chip was just with her because she looks like she could be like a sixteen year old cheerleader totally.

Well, I really think Olivia is like cool, smart, Olivia's really attractive, like she's every like emotionally dynamic. At least Taylor is, like clearly, I think I think Chip was just with her because she looks like she could be like a sixteen year old cheerleader totally.

But at least they both had great partners for them handed to them, and Austin a great partner for anyone, and they couldn't They had feelings for them, but they couldn't commit to them. And it's like this question of like with Shep, it's like, is it true that he really just like wants to have freedom and be able to fuck whoever he wants or does he have an emotional wound of avoidance?

But at least they both had great partners for them handed to them, and Austin a great partner for anyone, and they couldn't They had feelings for them, but they couldn't commit to them. And it's like this question of like with Shep, it's like, is it true that he really just like wants to have freedom and be able to fuck whoever he wants or does he have an emotional wound of avoidance?

And same with Austin.

And same with Austin.

I think with Austin it's like much more clear that there's like a wound there. Obviously he lost his sister and now he like can't seem to let a woman fully in and then as a result, like is manipulative because he can't process any of his feelings. But it's just really interesting and I think it goes to this thing of dating too that in general, it's like, is anyone really happy just being alone? Because personally, I wow, as human beings. It's like we are meant to be in like we're actually meant to be in like groups of people and live in groups of people.

I think with Austin it's like much more clear that there's like a wound there. Obviously he lost his sister and now he like can't seem to let a woman fully in and then as a result, like is manipulative because he can't process any of his feelings. But it's just really interesting and I think it goes to this thing of dating too that in general, it's like, is anyone really happy just being alone? Because personally, I wow, as human beings. It's like we are meant to be in like we're actually meant to be in like groups of people and live in groups of people.

Not that I'm starting a cult or anything.

Not that I'm starting a cult or anything.

I'm like, we're actually meant to all live in my house and raise my goats with me and then drink the goats A yeah, no, but like we're meant to be in connection with others. So it's like I always have this question of like I know people who are like I'm just happy being single, Like I just want to be single. That's and I know people my ex boyfriend said that, like it's like I just want to be alone and like that's how I'm happy.

I'm like, we're actually meant to all live in my house and raise my goats with me and then drink the goats A yeah, no, but like we're meant to be in connection with others. So it's like I always have this question of like I know people who are like I'm just happy being single, Like I just want to be single. That's and I know people my ex boyfriend said that, like it's like I just want to be alone and like that's how I'm happy.

And it's like, is anyone happy that way?

And it's like, is anyone happy that way?

Or is that just like a coping mechanism of not wanting to let people in?

Or is that just like a coping mechanism of not wanting to let people in?

Right, It's such a good question. I'm not sure. I think it's clear with these men. And I really think that Shep is in love with her and just doesn't know how to not cheat.

Right, It's such a good question. I'm not sure. I think it's clear with these men. And I really think that Shep is in love with her and just doesn't know how to not cheat.

I think he's in love with her too, because Page said that, and I believe everything she says.

I think he's in love with her too, because Page said that, and I believe everything she says.

Yes, And the way he was looking at her like he's still really attached to her. He cried when Austin had kissed her, And obviously you can still have feelings for someone. I know you're not supposed to be together, but I really think he's a sex atict, Like he has literally said I wish that I want to have sex with everyone in the world, And I'm sorry that that implies an addiction.

Yes, And the way he was looking at her like he's still really attached to her. He cried when Austin had kissed her, And obviously you can still have feelings for someone. I know you're not supposed to be together, but I really think he's a sex atict, Like he has literally said I wish that I want to have sex with everyone in the world, And I'm sorry that that implies an addiction.

Problem that's so exhausting. Who could want that?

Problem that's so exhausting. Who could want that?

It's very, so tiring everyone, anyone, I know.

It's very, so tiring everyone, anyone, I know.

I'm like, Okay, this is what I don't get.

I'm like, Okay, this is what I don't get.

Like, I totally get poor an addiction like wanting to master me constantly, but like actually having to meet someone and then have sex with them, that's so tiring.

Like, I totally get poor an addiction like wanting to master me constantly, but like actually having to meet someone and then have sex with them, that's so tiring.

No, thank you. And I think Austin, like I completely agree, can't make up his mind, can't let someone in. Even Madison, like, who's kind of crazy, but I love her for it.

No, thank you. And I think Austin, like I completely agree, can't make up his mind, can't let someone in. Even Madison, like, who's kind of crazy, but I love her for it.

Obsessed us.

Obsessed us.

I mean, she's also just, i'm sorry, so hot that I could look at her forever. Every time she comes on screen, I'm like, you're the hottest person I've ever seen in my life.

I mean, she's also just, i'm sorry, so hot that I could look at her forever. Every time she comes on screen, I'm like, you're the hottest person I've ever seen in my life.

When she smiles, my brain chemistry shifts.

When she smiles, my brain chemistry shifts.

I just can't stop looking at her boobs. I'm like, suddenly like a teenage boy I'm just like, Okay, your body is absolutely ridiculous. Yes, but that is me and I'm perverted. Yes, sick fuck is You're a sick fuck And the words of Beth Going. I think that Austin's relationship with Olivia actually kind of broke my heart in the past few episodes me because I know the feeling of being an ex and knowing or even you know, there's a guy in high school I was absolutely in love with and he was a friend of mine, and I remember knowing that he was going through something and that he didn't want me to be there for him like that I was not to like you know, that he was not interested in like my company, and just thinking about how much pain he was in, and that killed me. And I completely understood when Austin was like crying, like I really didn't think he was making about himself, because I just kept thinking, you have you truly love this person, Like he keeps telling her I don't want you like I want you in my life, and you can tell that he means it, and knowing specifically him knowing how much pain she's in is like destroying him. Like he's like, I just don't want to make it worse. I just want to find a way to show up for her. And I thought it was really cute the way she described him showing up for her, like how he was like, Okay, I'm across the street, Okay, I'm at your doorstep, Okay, I'm here, like he was really trying to be sensitive, very sweet, and that he wrote her a note and just gave her food. I don't know. I just thought that this is someone who really does care about how he could have just sent her flowers, you know, but this is someone who really does care about how he's showing up for her.

I just can't stop looking at her boobs. I'm like, suddenly like a teenage boy I'm just like, Okay, your body is absolutely ridiculous. Yes, but that is me and I'm perverted. Yes, sick fuck is You're a sick fuck And the words of Beth Going. I think that Austin's relationship with Olivia actually kind of broke my heart in the past few episodes me because I know the feeling of being an ex and knowing or even you know, there's a guy in high school I was absolutely in love with and he was a friend of mine, and I remember knowing that he was going through something and that he didn't want me to be there for him like that I was not to like you know, that he was not interested in like my company, and just thinking about how much pain he was in, and that killed me. And I completely understood when Austin was like crying, like I really didn't think he was making about himself, because I just kept thinking, you have you truly love this person, Like he keeps telling her I don't want you like I want you in my life, and you can tell that he means it, and knowing specifically him knowing how much pain she's in is like destroying him. Like he's like, I just don't want to make it worse. I just want to find a way to show up for her. And I thought it was really cute the way she described him showing up for her, like how he was like, Okay, I'm across the street, Okay, I'm at your doorstep, Okay, I'm here, like he was really trying to be sensitive, very sweet, and that he wrote her a note and just gave her food. I don't know. I just thought that this is someone who really does care about how he could have just sent her flowers, you know, but this is someone who really does care about how he's showing up for her.

I totally agree, And I felt like at least, I mean, I kind of hate what Bravo people do, Like the therapist on the show Things with Me Tell, It's like, who is that person? Like, I know my girls, my two girls that do my therapy. They would never be caught down on a reality show. If I joined Real Housewives and asked them like, hey, so we're gonna do a session, they would probably say no.

I totally agree, And I felt like at least, I mean, I kind of hate what Bravo people do, Like the therapist on the show Things with Me Tell, It's like, who is that person? Like, I know my girls, my two girls that do my therapy. They would never be caught down on a reality show. If I joined Real Housewives and asked them like, hey, so we're gonna do a session, they would probably say no.

I did love Bethany and therapy. That's all I'll say. Bethany and therapy talking about her childhood. I could probably watch a show just based on that because she had such a dogshit childhood.

I did love Bethany and therapy. That's all I'll say. Bethany and therapy talking about her childhood. I could probably watch a show just based on that because she had such a dogshit childhood.

But and I know what, though, that's not an excuse for her past, that is not an excuse for having a huge dinner with Ninian Riquel and all these fucking random asses trying to take down Andy.

But and I know what, though, that's not an excuse for her past, that is not an excuse for having a huge dinner with Ninian Riquel and all these fucking random asses trying to take down Andy.

Well, I think we also have a vested interest in Bravo staying afloat. Like I literally I read that there's gonna be a Vanity Fair expose on Bravo and I was like.

Well, I think we also have a vested interest in Bravo staying afloat. Like I literally I read that there's gonna be a Vanity Fair expose on Bravo and I was like.

No, do not I know, say, I know that's what my cousin is. My cousin Colleen sent me that. I'm like, I don't want to know. We cannot lose this. And by the way, try to take it down, like, try.

No, do not I know, say, I know that's what my cousin is. My cousin Colleen sent me that. I'm like, I don't want to know. We cannot lose this. And by the way, try to take it down, like, try.

To show me what's wrong with that.

To show me what's wrong with that.

Because I'm watching The Real House Lives of New York season two or season two point zero whatever reunion and Andy is a therapist.

Because I'm watching The Real House Lives of New York season two or season two point zero whatever reunion and Andy is a therapist.

He's like, sigh, you're really tough. Do you think that's a coping mechanism? Girls?

He's like, sigh, you're really tough. Do you think that's a coping mechanism? Girls?

What was it like to lose your mother? And then be I'm like, okay, this is therapy, And yes he might at the next section say people think you're a selfish horror bitch, and that's what everyone's saying, what do you say?

What was it like to lose your mother? And then be I'm like, okay, this is therapy, And yes he might at the next section say people think you're a selfish horror bitch, and that's what everyone's saying, what do you say?

But I listen.

But I listen.

Just you can't do this to me. I've lost, I've lost so much in this life, like I've been through so much in this life, like this is one of the I literally, I'm sorry. I wish it wasn't as consoling as it was. I wish a nice book was more consoling. But I go to it like a bomb. It's a bomb to my wounds.

Just you can't do this to me. I've lost, I've lost so much in this life, like I've been through so much in this life, like this is one of the I literally, I'm sorry. I wish it wasn't as consoling as it was. I wish a nice book was more consoling. But I go to it like a bomb. It's a bomb to my wounds.

I mean, listen, if we lose Bravo, we have ninety Day Fiance the other Way, which currently is featuring a couple that facetimes twenty four to seven even when they're going to the bathroom and they bring the case time into the bathroom. So there's always something to be watching and to be taking in. Now, let me just say the thing I was gonna say about Austin is like, at least he's trying to understand why he has this pattern of like getting together with these women and then not letting them in or like doing something to sabotage it, whereas I don't think Shep is trying to. It's like Shep like has the self knowledge and nothing else. He's like, yeah, I know I'm this way, but that's a coping mechanism too. He's like, yeah, this is just how I am. Like I'm just a fucking fuck boy, party boy.

I mean, listen, if we lose Bravo, we have ninety Day Fiance the other Way, which currently is featuring a couple that facetimes twenty four to seven even when they're going to the bathroom and they bring the case time into the bathroom. So there's always something to be watching and to be taking in. Now, let me just say the thing I was gonna say about Austin is like, at least he's trying to understand why he has this pattern of like getting together with these women and then not letting them in or like doing something to sabotage it, whereas I don't think Shep is trying to. It's like Shep like has the self knowledge and nothing else. He's like, yeah, I know I'm this way, but that's a coping mechanism too. He's like, yeah, this is just how I am. Like I'm just a fucking fuck boy, party boy.

But it's like, honey, I think there's something deeper going on.

But it's like, honey, I think there's something deeper going on.

It's true, it's true. I really think that everything goes back to the relationship with the mom too.

It's true, it's true. I really think that everything goes back to the relationship with the mom too.

I've got to say, men and their moms. It's really interesting.

I've got to say, men and their moms. It's really interesting.

Yea, their dads. I'm sorry, it's the same complexity and it's just not painted like no one says mommy issues. They all say daddy issues, including myself.

Yea, their dads. I'm sorry, it's the same complexity and it's just not painted like no one says mommy issues. They all say daddy issues, including myself.

Well I know that's so true. Like that's so true. It is. Someone was talking about that to me recently.

Well I know that's so true. Like that's so true. It is. Someone was talking about that to me recently.

It's like, yeah, it's very and it's very confusing because all of the.

It's like, yeah, it's very and it's very confusing because all of the.

Guys, could you ever.

Guys, could you ever.

Imagine we talked about literature, Like I don't know who I am anymore, but I've needed I've needed this year. I've been so sick this year that I've actually needed to read. And that's really sad. But it's like this thing of the men. I hate freud, but like there is this thing of like a man child.

Imagine we talked about literature, Like I don't know who I am anymore, but I've needed I've needed this year. I've been so sick this year that I've actually needed to read. And that's really sad. But it's like this thing of the men. I hate freud, but like there is this thing of like a man child.

Baby is born.

Baby is born.

That's so true. A baby is born, a baby is born.

That's so true. A baby is born, a baby is born.

Then their closest first caretaker is their mom, and they get this fear of like their mom is like supposed to have a penis and be like them but doesn't. And then it's like this castration thing, and then there's possibility for like healing or.

Then their closest first caretaker is their mom, and they get this fear of like their mom is like supposed to have a penis and be like them but doesn't. And then it's like this castration thing, and then there's possibility for like healing or.

Wounding, and like when the mom wounds, the.

Wounding, and like when the mom wounds, the.

Girlfriends of the future will suffer or boyfriends.

Girlfriends of the future will suffer or boyfriends.

Well, I also think that like moms in a way have a higher bar because they just need you know, you, just parenting is gender, and that people, babies, children need their mom more than they need their dad. I'm sorry, it's just true. They need both parents, but like your mom is literally feeding you for the first if you you know, if it's me.

Well, I also think that like moms in a way have a higher bar because they just need you know, you, just parenting is gender, and that people, babies, children need their mom more than they need their dad. I'm sorry, it's just true. They need both parents, but like your mom is literally feeding you for the first if you you know, if it's me.

Your mom, hopefully not your dad.

Your mom, hopefully not your dad.

And I think that we overestimate like an ability, like moms have to fail sometimes that's and of course if you're male, that's going to affect your relationship with women, or if you're you know, like what's his name who's redoing airbnbs and gentrifying Charleston. You're a married, mom fucking guy.

And I think that we overestimate like an ability, like moms have to fail sometimes that's and of course if you're male, that's going to affect your relationship with women, or if you're you know, like what's his name who's redoing airbnbs and gentrifying Charleston. You're a married, mom fucking guy.

Oh my ja, oh my god. That airbnb was so awful looking like, oh my.

Oh my ja, oh my god. That airbnb was so awful looking like, oh my.

God, and he was like, I'm going to push my launch party in light of what's happening, and you're like, yeah, buddy, I don't think anyone gives a ship. And he tells Rock He's like, I think you're holding up well all things considered. It's like you're talking to someone who's been on one day with Olivia as if like, yeah, I just met.

God, and he was like, I'm going to push my launch party in light of what's happening, and you're like, yeah, buddy, I don't think anyone gives a ship. And he tells Rock He's like, I think you're holding up well all things considered. It's like you're talking to someone who's been on one day with Olivia as if like, yeah, I just met.

He was like, Rod's like yeah, I mean it's like a little weird because we just got started dating.

He was like, Rod's like yeah, I mean it's like a little weird because we just got started dating.

But okay. And she also, yeah, the mom and he's like, oh, Mom's gonna get her jabs in there a little bit. I'm like, ew, you guys are sick.

But okay. And she also, yeah, the mom and he's like, oh, Mom's gonna get her jabs in there a little bit. I'm like, ew, you guys are sick.

I also want to say that I've come watching Austin, watching Shep and and how difficult they find it to not cheat or you know, be there permanently for a woman. I really have come to love Craig. I'm sorry, but is Paige to move to Charleston? And I am like, I think I get secondhand frustration because of how much I want to like commit to a man. But I'm like, Page, just move to Charleston. You have someone who you can say, when you get into a house, bring my suitcase upstairs and get me a glass of water. And he does it happily.

I also want to say that I've come watching Austin, watching Shep and and how difficult they find it to not cheat or you know, be there permanently for a woman. I really have come to love Craig. I'm sorry, but is Paige to move to Charleston? And I am like, I think I get secondhand frustration because of how much I want to like commit to a man. But I'm like, Page, just move to Charleston. You have someone who you can say, when you get into a house, bring my suitcase upstairs and get me a glass of water. And he does it happily.

And she has her own bedroom.

And she has her own bedroom.

She has her own bedroom. And he's not like, you're crazy. He's like, oh yeah, this this is great. So your shit's sound everywhere.

She has her own bedroom. And he's not like, you're crazy. He's like, oh yeah, this this is great. So your shit's sound everywhere.

I just don't think I could live in Charleston. I think living in the South is like not something I could do. But no offense to all, no offense to all.

I just don't think I could live in Charleston. I think living in the South is like not something I could do. But no offense to all, no offense to all.

Listen, I want to live in Los Angeles. But if I fell in love, who knows what I would do.

Listen, I want to live in Los Angeles. But if I fell in love, who knows what I would do.

I know.

I know.

That's the thing. It's funny. What was I talking about recently?

That's the thing. It's funny. What was I talking about recently?

Oh?

Oh?

I was saying like how I need to be more like avoidant people like I'm like so insecure, attached, like desperate to find a partner.

I was saying like how I need to be more like avoidant people like I'm like so insecure, attached, like desperate to find a partner.

I need to be more like people who are afraid of that.

I need to be more like people who are afraid of that.

And I was saying, like some people will like they're like, okay, if someone's like ten minutes late to a date, like bye, I'm not I'm not giving them the time of day. Whereas I'm like, if someone was like, hey, there's a single person in uh, Oklahoma, I think I'd be like, great, I'm getting in the car now, and I'll say you guys, yeah, yeah, Like I'm like, I mean I have I have flown to a different country, to go on a date with someone.

And I was saying, like some people will like they're like, okay, if someone's like ten minutes late to a date, like bye, I'm not I'm not giving them the time of day. Whereas I'm like, if someone was like, hey, there's a single person in uh, Oklahoma, I think I'd be like, great, I'm getting in the car now, and I'll say you guys, yeah, yeah, Like I'm like, I mean I have I have flown to a different country, to go on a date with someone.

Well, you know, I have too, and you know, when I got there, I had to tell him that I was dating his roommate.

Well, you know, I have too, and you know, when I got there, I had to tell him that I was dating his roommate.

Time I got there, I had to.

Time I got there, I had to.

I mean, I don't even want to get into that, but it was just like I literally was like, if this person could be my boyfriend, then yeah, I'm gonna fly to a different country.

I mean, I don't even want to get into that, but it was just like I literally was like, if this person could be my boyfriend, then yeah, I'm gonna fly to a different country.

I don't know what to tell you.

I don't know what to tell you.

I don't know what to tell you. An imaginary person who's judging me.

I don't know what to tell you. An imaginary person who's judging me.

No, I think a lot of people judge me. And that's okay. My baby son Cookie is just smelling to her cat.

No, I think a lot of people judge me. And that's okay. My baby son Cookie is just smelling to her cat.

I'm not her baby son.

I'm not her baby son.

Wait can you hear him purring in the microphone? That's so cute.

Wait can you hear him purring in the microphone? That's so cute.

Okay, so let's just say, yeah, Craig is making the list the gluten free LASAGNYA.

Okay, so let's just say, yeah, Craig is making the list the gluten free LASAGNYA.

I are a little bit scared that he is going to end things with Pate. I think that they're headed for a breakup because I think it's it's gonna be like marry me or bust.

I are a little bit scared that he is going to end things with Pate. I think that they're headed for a breakup because I think it's it's gonna be like marry me or bust.

But I think they both like deserve better if there if neither of them as will because I'm also like, I don't know, I guess like Craig is like, I can't be away from the pillow business. I'm like, it's an e commerce business, Like, I mean, he has the storefront. I don't know, but I'm just like, if neither of them is really willing to make that transition, then they deserve someone who's more committed.

But I think they both like deserve better if there if neither of them as will because I'm also like, I don't know, I guess like Craig is like, I can't be away from the pillow business. I'm like, it's an e commerce business, Like, I mean, he has the storefront. I don't know, but I'm just like, if neither of them is really willing to make that transition, then they deserve someone who's more committed.

Yeah, that's true. But I do like them together. And he's so clearly in love with her. He laughed so hard at whatever she says. And I mean, beautiful last person. I'm I'm in love with him.

Yeah, that's true. But I do like them together. And he's so clearly in love with her. He laughed so hard at whatever she says. And I mean, beautiful last person. I'm I'm in love with him.

She's so stunning and so funny and interesting and a really good friend and a girl's girl and has great sense about people like like, this is the perfect example of a man recognizing what he's been blessed with, you know, Like he's like, yeah, she's incredible, of course, you know. Anyway, whereas some men, aka anyone we've ever been involved with, weren't so aware of their blessings.

She's so stunning and so funny and interesting and a really good friend and a girl's girl and has great sense about people like like, this is the perfect example of a man recognizing what he's been blessed with, you know, Like he's like, yeah, she's incredible, of course, you know. Anyway, whereas some men, aka anyone we've ever been involved with, weren't so aware of their blessings.

I'm aware of my blessing being friends with you, me.

I'm aware of my blessing being friends with you, me.

Too, And I'm aware of my blessing with my son. Anyway. Next thing, the girls hang, right, So Vanita and Leva.

Too, And I'm aware of my blessing with my son. Anyway. Next thing, the girls hang, right, So Vanita and Leva.

Vanita and Leva. I'm really I'm coming to love Leva.

Vanita and Leva. I'm really I'm coming to love Leva.

Actually, me too.

Actually, me too.

I have had some issues with her, especially when I watched Southern Hospitality.

I have had some issues with her, especially when I watched Southern Hospitality.

I was just like, Okay, you're not that cool, like get over yourself.

I was just like, Okay, you're not that cool, like get over yourself.

But I think she's like stunningly beautiful. I think Vanita is too, and I think that there I found it so offensive how it was clearly just Vanita was like, yeah, I've been calling Taylor all week. She hasn't called me back then obviously just because they know, like that she's on like she knows Vannita's on camera. Taylor calls her and is like, hey, sorry, like things have just been crazy, like making Olivia's brother's death about herself, and Vanita's like yeah, and Olivia's had like found a way to call me back. Yeah, And then Taylor has the gall to be like, Okay, well I really know Olivia. That's why I should come over and like and Leva like thank God, like grabs the phone and it's like, you know, I've known Olivia forever, right, It's just all very I'm shocked at Olivia's maturity in terms of this tailor thing. If I found out that, for instance, you had kissed an X of mine after lying to me about it, I would freak out and be like I like, after a traumatic incident, I would both need you there, which I can you know, I can see that, like that's a part of it, but I would also it would just be so emotionally charged.

But I think she's like stunningly beautiful. I think Vanita is too, and I think that there I found it so offensive how it was clearly just Vanita was like, yeah, I've been calling Taylor all week. She hasn't called me back then obviously just because they know, like that she's on like she knows Vannita's on camera. Taylor calls her and is like, hey, sorry, like things have just been crazy, like making Olivia's brother's death about herself, and Vanita's like yeah, and Olivia's had like found a way to call me back. Yeah, And then Taylor has the gall to be like, Okay, well I really know Olivia. That's why I should come over and like and Leva like thank God, like grabs the phone and it's like, you know, I've known Olivia forever, right, It's just all very I'm shocked at Olivia's maturity in terms of this tailor thing. If I found out that, for instance, you had kissed an X of mine after lying to me about it, I would freak out and be like I like, after a traumatic incident, I would both need you there, which I can you know, I can see that, like that's a part of it, but I would also it would just be so emotionally charged.

Yeah, I can't even imagine, like even even exs from like years ago, and this is like they they kissed like right when they were like mid it was like almost like they were still breaking up, you know what I mean. It's like if you or I found out that the other did that with ex'es from like three five years ago, I would still be.

Yeah, I can't even imagine, like even even exs from like years ago, and this is like they they kissed like right when they were like mid it was like almost like they were still breaking up, you know what I mean. It's like if you or I found out that the other did that with ex'es from like three five years ago, I would still be.

Like, wait, what the fuck, Like are you kidding?

Like, wait, what the fuck, Like are you kidding?

And they did this when when the breakup was like basically still happening, and they're like on the reunion, and then they showed that clip where Taylor's like Taylor said something in the reunion where she was like, I think you should just sweep Olivia off her feet, and it's like, but you kissed him. But what's interesting is someone was talking about like comparing Raquel to Taylor, and the difference is I think that Taylor's whole motivation is to get back at Chef, like when they were at that dinner party and shep is like, well, it's hard for me to imagine, like you kissing him.

And they did this when when the breakup was like basically still happening, and they're like on the reunion, and then they showed that clip where Taylor's like Taylor said something in the reunion where she was like, I think you should just sweep Olivia off her feet, and it's like, but you kissed him. But what's interesting is someone was talking about like comparing Raquel to Taylor, and the difference is I think that Taylor's whole motivation is to get back at Chef, like when they were at that dinner party and shep is like, well, it's hard for me to imagine, like you kissing him.

Taylor smiled like that's all she wants, and.

Taylor smiled like that's all she wants, and.

She even says that she said that in an interview. She was like, yeah, I sent Whitney a naked picture of myself by the way Whitney looks to camera, and she was like, and it was just to get back at chat.

She even says that she said that in an interview. She was like, yeah, I sent Whitney a naked picture of myself by the way Whitney looks to camera, and she was like, and it was just to get back at chat.

It was just to get like some.

It was just to get like some.

Like a rile out of chet and do I relate to that high third percent? And that's why it doesn't feel as evil as I'm sorry to say Raquel, I.

Like a rile out of chet and do I relate to that high third percent? And that's why it doesn't feel as evil as I'm sorry to say Raquel, I.

Mean, the Raquel things a whole different story.

Mean, the Raquel things a whole different story.

Okay, what else happened? I guess they ended on that note. The girls hang, the girls hang.

Okay, what else happened? I guess they ended on that note. The girls hang, the girls hang.

I'm really excited for when the Whitney picture gets exposed. I mean, sending nudes to your ex boyfriend's friend. I've done a lot of things, as Madison said, I've done a lot of shady things, but hooking up with a friends X is not one of them. I actually did do that in high school, and don't worry, that was a low point in my life. Well, high school, college, childhood, childhood, yeah, childhood doesn't count. Well. I would never do that to you.

I'm really excited for when the Whitney picture gets exposed. I mean, sending nudes to your ex boyfriend's friend. I've done a lot of things, as Madison said, I've done a lot of shady things, but hooking up with a friends X is not one of them. I actually did do that in high school, and don't worry, that was a low point in my life. Well, high school, college, childhood, childhood, yeah, childhood doesn't count. Well. I would never do that to you.

I would never do that to you either, and also like.

I would never do that to you either, and also like.

Mainly because we're not attracted to each other's exes. That yeah, like also a.

Mainly because we're not attracted to each other's exes. That yeah, like also a.

Big new thinkye. Well next week more on this.

Big new thinkye. Well next week more on this.

We'll keep you posted on Bachelor and Paradise and girl.

We'll keep you posted on Bachelor and Paradise and girl.

The Girl pooped by the way, the constipated girl she had.

The Girl pooped by the way, the constipated girl she had.

She did answered, Paradise has so little to do, Like this season is kind of a dud that they're really making a girl being constipated a huge plot point.

She did answered, Paradise has so little to do, Like this season is kind of a dud that they're really making a girl being constipated a huge plot point.

I'm sorry. I didn't mean she pooped.

I'm sorry. I didn't mean she pooped.

I meant she had to leave to get surgery in the US to have a removal of the.

I meant she had to leave to get surgery in the US to have a removal of the.

I'm sorry, I did not mean she pooped. I would like to correct my past. This is journalism, let's not forget it.

I'm sorry, I did not mean she pooped. I would like to correct my past. This is journalism, let's not forget it.

I don't want to get called out for like the ethics of that. And the truth is she had to leave and get surgery on her buttole anyway. I love you, Devin, love you Carol.

I don't want to get called out for like the ethics of that. And the truth is she had to leave and get surgery on her buttole anyway. I love you, Devin, love you Carol.

I want true.

I want true.

It's true, true, Sa, it's so romantic. Love me, baby, don't leave me, haggin, I won't true

It's true, true, Sa, it's so romantic. Love me, baby, don't leave me, haggin, I won't true