True Romance with Carolina Barlow and Devin LearyCarolina and Devin discuss asking for help in a relationship (they won’t) and why that hinders their current home and apartment moves. Then they give updates on Bravo’s Summer House, specifically the victimhood of Carl Radke at the hands of Lindsay Hubbard, currently the most diabolical woman on Bravo. Plus, the women share some of their current inspiration; Carolina is inspired by Lala Kent’s family planning whilst Devin is inspired by women who dare to get BBL’s.
Oh I won't true.
Hello, and welcome to true Romance.
We had to edit out Devin's introduction to this week's episode because it went hello and welcome to true romance.
Listen and shut the fuck up.
I thought that was charming, but I guess people don't like my personality.
Devin.
You came to me this morning and what I would describe as a mood.
Well, I would say, I sent you like six different text messages before that, and I'm like, all right, can we start at twelve? Okay, you know what, No, we can't. No, it's one to two is fine, No, okay, it's this is how I've been because you know what's so funny. You know, it's so funny when you make plans and God laughs, Like I went to Cirah.
Power has a sense of humor.
My higher power is a sense of humor.
Let me say one thing, which is that my cats in the new environment are so nervous and I can see them walking around like little aliens, boffing their heads like looking so confused, and it's breaking.
My little evil heart to pieces. But let me say this.
So I go to dinner last week with friends, I say I'm moving on Friday. They say, oh my god, you seem totally calm. I said, yeah, it's really weird. I'm actually like not even stressed for this.
Move.
Flash forward. I'm in fetal position. There's movers in my house taking my stuff out. I'm in fetal position with my cats, can't eat, like something occurred. So now that I've been in therapy for a while, I can understand that this is something from childhood is getting brought up because it's not normal that like movers arrive at my house.
Nothing actually like went wrong, but like the movers are.
Like in my space, like like taking apart the bed and like making a lot of noise, and I literally like was sick to my stomach, Like I became ill. And then I was like in fetal position in this room. I was staying in a room with my cats because they were scared, and I like took all this stuff out of the room. So I'm in this like empty room with my cats and I am in fetal position. My friend Hayley sends the song Moving Out by Casey musk Graves, and she's like, oh my god. Casey musk Graves came out with a song called Moving Out on your moving day. I start playing it. I text her, I go, I can't even hear the words. Nothing's going in, nothing's going out. It's like, you know, it used to happen with my dog Eddie, Like he gets so nervous and overstimulated sometimes that he can't even react to food, like you could put like a freshly roasted you could put like a fresh, freshly roasted chicken in front of his nose, and when he's that activated, he can't even smell it and he doesn't take a bite.
Like that was me.
I was like, I can't hear the words it's not sinking in, nothing's affecting.
I FaceTime my boyfriend.
Yeah yeah, Caroline, and I was like, oh, is everything okay with your boyfriend? I'm like, yeah, unfortunately he is a victim now, but I mean, is everything okay with him?
On my end?
But he has been victimized by this experience because he facetimed.
Me and he's like, how's it going.
I immediately collapsed into like ugly crying tears, and he starts trying to give advice, and I'm like, I can't hear anything you're saying.
It's not making any sense, Like I have to go.
So then I hang up and I actually at one point said to him then he was like helping me move boxes, and I hit my head. I hit my head on the door frame, and I was like, oh, I'm kind of scared. This is gonna be like Natasha Richardson, honestly, like that wouldn't even be that bad right now. We did say in both things, yeah, and then I was like, what am I saying? Like, am I okay? I think like, I think it's this something from childhood about being an inconvenience. So the two things that activated me the most were the loud noises and like the feeling that my neighbors are gonna be like upset, which they already have been had been difficult neighbors. They like left me all these notes about putting my recycling in the wrong way, and then turns out I'm the common denominator because then when I was like recycling my moving boxes, someone else who works in this new building came and like knocked my door and was like, you have to put the boxes in like plastic bags. And again that activated me where I was like ugly crying and I'm like, I think it's something from like I'm like inconvenience something from childhood about inconveniencing people, disappointing people.
I already know.
I have like this thing about like doing something wrong without realizing it, and like it just like a lot of core childhood stuff came up. I will say, this is something that was helpful. He had this show that he was supposed to go to. I was like, you know what, I can go to the show because I was actually remembering one time I was in a really bad state and my friend you Carolina, invited me to the movie Hustlers right, and that really helped get out of it. And then another time my friend invited me in the movie Saltburn and it really helped. So I went to the show and I felt a lot better. I slept well. But then today I'm back in the minutia of like having It's just like moving in New York, having to move, having to relocate from one apartment to the next. Like today I have to go back and clean out my old apartment. I also have to pick up a piece of furniture. I have to get rid of another piece of furniture. It's just like so complicated and it's just a lot.
Yeah, I I it's so interesting.
I think as women were conditioned to constantly make sure or I won't speak for all women, but I'll say a lot of women are conditioned to make sure that you're never asking too much of people, you know. It's like why Joey on The Bachelor are so celebrated is because he's asking like questions and following up, Like we don't even ask men to like keep track of our problem and follow up about them. Yeah, And it's so funny because I made when anyone asks me if they can help with me moving, I always say no.
I'm like say, I would never ask say anyone to me.
If I can give you my firstborn child in exchange, then yeah, but then I'm resentful, so crazy to me, But then I'm resentful because people don't help.
Well, I'm just more like, can I do everything in a vacuum and just bear the brunt of everything in different ways? And I don't think that's healthy. I don't think. I think true intimacy is like asking for help and I don't think I've ever done that in a relationship, like really be like I need you right now, which is kind of crazy when you think about it, like, I'm like a thirty almost thirty four year old that's right, teasing my birthday woman who's like never fully asked for help in situations because I both didn't believe that my partner would be willing to show and didn't think I deserved that right. So I think that makes situations like moving very overwhelming because you, like, without admitting it to yourself, believe that you can like only rely on a few people.
Yes, which is sad.
That's just like another sad fact by being a woman in America, America. I have this crazy realization the other day, which may seem very normal to other people, but it's given me a sense of peace that is so amazing. So it hit me and I can't say that Lala Kent, one of the stars of vander pump roles, wasn't a factor. Okay, So Laala Kent is having another baby with a sperm downer. So cool, so cool, and she I just like that, Like when vander Pump was questioning her, she wasn't like, she was like, you can't change my mind, and she was like, I'm gonna fall in love again. I'm gonna have a baby with him. I'll have a lot of babies and I'll be really happy.
Yeah.
I love being a mother.
Anyway, I just started thinking and I realized, but if I don't meet someone and I'm forty and I'm financially capable of doing this, I can adopt a baby, or I can I'm not saying that's easy to do.
I'm not saying that's easy to do.
I'm not saying you can just get a baby, but I can foster a child, I can adopt a baby, I can get a sperm donor like. There are solutions to building a family that do not involve men. And ever since I have really thought that and realized that, I've relaxed because I'm like, oh, I've always thought like I'll be alone forever, and it's like, no, I can build my own family. Yeah, it's much easier to do that with a partner. But also a lot of times people settle for partners that make it not easy, and you be better off on your own and you wouldn't be in like a you know, perhaps like a toxic co parenting situation totally. And so I just like have been so relaxed, and it's made me so open for love. In this really relaxed way where I'm just like, yeah, if love like comes into my life again, I will be so happy. But that's necessary for me to live a fulfilled life.
Yeah, which I.
Think is like radical in its own way, where I'm like, oh, I don't need a man like that. They can be a lovely addition to my life. And like if they did enter my life and we did have a kid together, yeah, I would need them in a different way.
But like, if I want to, some dads may as well just not even be there.
I mean, some dads are just there too. This is not true for my father. He's a great dad, but I have seen some dads.
Be more harm than they are like a good influence.
Yeah, totally man, So okay, that's cool.
I'm not sure how we got there from my move to talking about just want to hear your.
Family, But that's cool. Cool, all right? Well, should we talk about Summerhouse?
Yes? We should.
I was at a party last ning where my friend was shouting at me about Summerhouse, and then we started shouting at a person who did not watch Summerhouse about Summer House, and I could tell they were overwhelmed. But even they were like, who is this girl named Lindsay?
Oh my god, who is this girl named Lindsay?
Is?
How do you even answer that question?
Okay, we are now in a series of a toxic relationship that's making Amanda and Kyle look like the Obamas in terms of healthy relationships. Like Amanda and Kyle, this is the best thing that ever happened to them. They finally look like a stable like partnership on TV.
Lindsay is an alcoholic and there's just no way around it.
And she and the the cruel thing is that this is not this is consistently being left off camera, so she's it's so cruel and it's so like, how.
Hard is it? We've seen the cameras in the cars.
It's because like I'm like, can they not just hire like a driver so we can see that it's not that hard.
It's really harmful. It's a harmful actually, it's harmful, and it is hard. And what's hard about it is that I know I'm on Carl's side, but I have to piece together what happened. And Lindsay as she and I hate to use this word because of how trendy it is, but as she gaslights the hell out of Carl is like one of the craziest things I've ever seen happen. So lindsay, basically the gist of it is consistently asks Carl, a sober man whose brother died of an overdose, what are you on? We find out later that Carl smokes weed. As someone who has smoked a lot of weed in my life, I know that that's not.
Like hard drugs.
Yeah, and it doesn't like change, like, it doesn't change your behavior except you might be hungrier and you might be like having trouble paying attention.
I don't even know that.
I know, like there's nothing where you would be like, oh my god, what is this person on like think about I don't know. I feel like ninety percent of like bodega's in New York now are like smoke shops, and like a lot of the time the person working there is like obviously high, which grade, Like that's what I would do if I worked at a place called like vape galore. But I've never once had a problem with that person's behavior because they're basically just like slightly calmer than most people checking you out like I mean sorry, checking you out at the cashier, like they're usually just like a little bit calm and laugh at my jokes. How about like that, I've never been like whoa, whoa, whoa, brother, what are you on right now?
Like no, so that's Lindsay's excuse. Carl is like you are aggressive towards me. You've been drinking all day. Also, watching Lindsay drink, you think, like, do you hate Carl? She is downing Martini's in one golf.
In one goal, And can I also say, like Lindsay is someone who I relate to in the sense that she seems to care a lot about like looking super hot, and all previous seasons she always looks really hot, like she's always got like a crop top, like showing stuff and like there's nothing wrong with like not being that way. But I do notice that all of her clothes are not only like bad and loose fitting, they're also just like so wrinkled, Like I'm like, you just like pulled that out of the bottom of your bag, which which reminds me of like being in college. And literally I've never been lazier about my appearance than when I was binge drinking blacking out in college because I was like, well, I got to go out, so that's all I really care about. So I guess I'm gonna wear like these dirty jeans that are like soiled and like don't care because I literally didn't wash my face in college. I didn't care what I looked like. I was just like, I gotta get out, show my tits, and that's it. And she's wearing these wrinkled, crumpled up things from like the corner of her bag, being like Gabby, I'm gonna just get another rosette.
Oh yeah, like with every single sentence. Side note, I was at a party last night and told a story about pissing in a girl's bed when I was black out drunk and not how.
Dark that is.
I forgot that, like the room it was like silenced the room.
Everyone was like, oh, like that's horrible and disgusting, and I was like, yeah, so that's like another reason why I don't that's like another yeah anyway, so I don't drink anymore. It was so painful coming back to I know, and I'm just like, oh, I forgot, Like my audience isn't necessarily like the most fucked up people in America. It's like pretty normal people who like have paid their taxes on time and such. But yes, so constantly we're in the camera in Carl Lindsay's room. They haven't slept in the same bed for like three weekends in a row. They're getting married. And someone reminded me last night that at the last reunion, Kyle, out of all people, little Prophet Kyle was like, you guys are in the honeymoon phase right now because Lindsay's not drinking, and I'm really curious to see what happens when Lindsay starts drinking again. Yeah, and you can tell, like Lindsay I think like partially hates Carl, like I hate Car he really loves her, not even partial, Like he keeps barking like a dog, which I'll is annoying, and someone She's like, if Carl keeps barking, I'm gonna give the ring back, and Kyle goes what like it's like, why are you being so mean? And when they go outside, she's like closing her eyes and Carl's like, hang out with me, babe, and she's just in her confessional being like we're on top of each other, like you need space for each other. All this is true, but it's like you can be a nice partner, but they live.
In like a huge apartment. She's like, we both work from home.
I'm like, okay, you live in a giant penthouse and can afford to do like eighty like burious boot camps today. Like if you're hating each other when you have that much money, there's a problem, first of all. Second of all, what about when she's like confronting him about how his like sober sports bar business won't work and like, of course it won't. And I would be really really annoyed and struggle if I was dating someone and they were like, hey, so like I actually think my brilliant idea for how I'm gonna have money for our family is to have a sober sports bar.
Like that would be really tough for me.
That being said, her being like I have I've represented all of the top bars and restaurants in the game.
And it's like, no you haven't, No, you haven't.
It's like wait, it's you are make believe a publicist, Like you're a publicist like I was, you know, a fashion stylist when I was playing barbies as a kid.
Right, But also she's like I don't whatever, So that and It's also just like I don't know, like I have been with someone who I didn't respect their business and job at all, but I did my best to pretend, and when I couldn't pretend anymore, I broke up with him. I didn't let him break up with me and then act like a victim about it. And he was a cop, just kidding, and he yeah, I didn't.
Respect what he did because his name was don j. I know.
I was trying to think of someone funny within the Trump organization, but I'm like, I like, don't know who that would be.
It turned out it is important to like respect what your partner does. And by the way, that doesn't mean they have a fancy ass job. It's just like, are you a respectable person?
Yeah?
And are you doing your job like with dignity and whether that's like being high at a bodega, which I think is like a totally dignified position, or like, you know, being the son of the like the worst president in America, which is you know not what. Sorry, I don't I hate to get political, but yeah, I was like, Okay, that is like the stupidest idea, Like I'm a sober sports bar, like anyone who's like going to pay like six dollars to go drink a diet coke and watch a game.
But I will say some mocktails are really good though, and I will say, of course.
But no one's going to like collectively go and be like, let's go somewhere where there's no alcohol when let me say.
Let me say the the calling card that I want to say, which is if you have mocktails at a regular bar, that's the best thing because then it's like not like I'm just standing here doing nothing, bored, and everybody else gets to have something fun. I just think that it's important for mock to to be represented.
Oh yeah, isn't it interesting.
I feel like in the last I want to say, five years, mock tails have really hit the scene. I think sobriety has gotten very popular. I'm not going to say Kyle Richards was the turning point, but like when Housewives are on, like when the housewives have started getting sober, you know, like it's really hit the mainstream.
I mean, I think Doja Cat doesn't drink. I think Miley Cyrus doesn't drink. I know Jlo doesn't drink. I know Kim Kardashian is too boring to drink.
So yeah, yeah, there was a great old school episode of The Kardashians where Kim Kardashian decides to get drunk, and this is when it was like a good television show. It was so drunk and it's like screaming. It's it's incredible. Now it's like, might as well be a sponsored ad for like bbl's.
I know, but let me just say something. Also, when I see a BBL in real life, I love nothing more than seeing that. I'm just like, Wow, that's a beautiful thing that you did that.
One hundred percent. I also would like to it's so funny. Now I'm thinking back to a moment when I was thinking about like what it'd be crazy if I got a BBL.
And now I'm like, absolutely what.
Was I thinking?
But sometimes we take a full flight from reality with some things like that. So I was watching bbls on YouTube and it was really hard to watch.
It's also like when once you're doing like botox and then then the people are like, oh, what about filler, and then you're like all right, but then so maybe like filler in my ass and then you're like, hey, you know, it's just a slippery slope, as they say it, Liberry. That is what my mom said when I got my nose job. She was like, listen, this is a slippery slope. And I was like, listen, I'm done skiing. No, you listen, I've done skiing with this, and then now here I am I'm older. I'm like, I'm gonna need a boob augmentation at some point. They're sagging low. I'm gonna need a lot of other stuff.
I mine or sag.
Even my thirty four a's are sagging low, which you know, you don't expect anything worse to happen to you after having small bras, but it turns out they can.
They can also, you know, touch your stomach.
I would love to like feel fake boobs, and I really, uh wish that would happen, just because I felt silicone implants in like my doctor's office when he left. I was like immediately touching those and I'm just so curious how they feel because I've touched like big boobs before and I'm always like, wow, this is what I'm passing out on. Yeah, you know totally yeah, wow is eat Wow. But Lindsay and Carl come to head. This is when you're like, I truly feel bad for this man. Like he's like, she should be the one who asks me to talk, which is absolutely the case.
She does not.
She should be the one to apologize. Carl apologizes.
I cat tell he's just like wanting this to be over because she's this fiance and you can tell with her, I'm like, for someone who wants to get married, you are okay burning this all down? Yes, yes, which is fascinating, Like she's him a terrorist. He's like trying to defend her, but he has no leg to stand on because everyone's like this is crazy.
Well it's just so confusing too, like nothing's adding up. It's like she's like, no, I didn't think he was high, Okay, I actually thought he was like smoking weed. Well, if you're allowed to ask me like how drunk I am, then I'm allowed again. Like you said, it's like, all right, you are getting obliterated to the point where you can't have a conversation. And as someone who has ben sober and dated someone who gets obliterated to the point where they can't have a conversation, it's infuriating. You're like, great, so you and I are actually not spending time together right now because you're in a completely different place and you won't remember anything. You fucking say as someone who has been told I love you for the first time by someone who didn't remember it, like, it's fucking infuriating to.
Date someone like that.
And it's completely different than being like, oh, like, by the way, when people are like high or I've taken an edible, like usually I don't even know. I'm like, oh, And I actually had a friend who was like saying that their partner like never notices when they're like you just cannot notice that. So it's like completely different thing than asking like, oh, how much did you have to drink?
Also, he's a man, she's a woman.
Like, I think it's respectful to like pay attention to how drunk someone is when you're like ostensibly gonna like be sharing a bed with them. I don't know, I think that's like respectful and important kind of. I mean, I don't see the way he's doing it. Maybe he's doing it in a way that's not but to me, I'm like, yeah, I'm glad he's like trying to keep tabs on. Like the fact that you're black out versus her bring up that he's like smoking meats, like she's trying to get revenge on him.
It's so weird. She hates his guts.
She hates his guts, And.
Yeah, it's just very confusing because I'm like, this is someone who consistently sticks up for you at reunions when like you are so in the wrong and you are just like the crazy person. I just like, Yeah, for a long time, I was like, I don't know why Paige and Sierra have such a problem with her, Like, yeah, like the thing making out with Austin at her birthday party when she knew that Sierra really liked him was like a weird thing to do. But I just felt like their hate was so like outsized. And now I'm like, oh, you must be such a crazy person behind the scenes. When Paige was like you even any knows you're crazy. You threw a shoe at a producer, I was like, honestly, we have we're missing out on a you know better show, which is like Lindsay without the cameras on I know.
And also like she just doesn't she doesn't take accountability for a single thing, And it's interesting to see all the other people kind of having that reaction of like because on in the scandal all like thing, the only person who really had a leg to stand on was La La being like I kind of said from the beginning that Raquel sucked and I don't fuck with Sandoval at all. But in this case, they're all like, yeah, this is what we've been saying about Lindsay. Like Lindsay doesn't take accountability, she starts shit for no reason. She's like so over dramatic, she's like zero to one hundred, like like that's how they've described her, and it's true. It's like that argument was going nowhere, and then all she does is say like you're yelling, you're yelling, and it's like, but you're the one who's escalating this. It started as a calm conversation, It started with Carl's therapy language of like let's keep things whatever, and then you're the one who's like and you're allowed to talk about my drinking and it's like it turns into such a defensive, like childish.
Place and like literally talking shit about him behind his back, being like I know a darker side than nobody sees, and you're like, I can't imagine talking shit about like the person I was going to marry. Well, I think I definitely, like have had relationships where I've been very frustrated with like my partner, and have expressed frustration to like my closest friends. But I think like as I've gotten older, like I've really like loyal and like sticking by someone and like keeping our issues private has been really important to me because I want that vice versa, like if I'm not on my best behavior, which you like aren't all the time in like a long term relationship, I don't want my partner like talking shit about me. That's like the bare minimum.
I know.
And Kyle and Amanda they like I mean, I think again, it's a relationship where the woman Amanda hates Kyle, I know.
But it's interesting, like I do kind of feel like.
Kyle and Amanda talking shit about each other is slightly different. It doesn't seem to comfortable place of hatred in the same way like it does seem true.
It doesn't seem to comfortable place of contempt.
It's more just like her complaining about him in a kind of endearing way and him complaining about like trying to do his best and not being good enough and her not working hard.
I don't know.
It's just like kind of like a different story where I'm like, I do believe you guys will hug and kiss at the end of this day, And I don't believe that Carl and Lindsey will hoggen kiss ever again. I don't believe that will ever occur again.
Well, speaking of breakups, I am so fucking excited. I think this will be so fruitful for true romance, which is a show called The Valley which is premiering. Oh my god, I kind of doubtful, Like, I don't like this seems so contrived. They should just have Jackson Brittany back on vander Pump rules, Like they should just bring up first in doubt, Dodie, Like, I don't know why we have to have a new show. Even Laala was like we're friends in real life, Like I wish we could like film together. Yeah, we see that Jackson and Brittany are splitting up, and you're like, Brittany has finally had enough of this man, and like, I'm impressed that she's lasted this long. Then we see the trailer, and I have not been so enthralled with the trailer since the mid season trailer of Scandival, Like I watched the mid season trailer of.
Scandival where you know, Ariana.
Is like saying like I hope you die and like screaming at him so many times. And the Valley trailer I've already watched three times, and you know in the trailer, Brittany's like, we don't have sex. He's not attracted to me. There's couples that, like the guy admitted he wanted a divorce on camera, Like there's just there's all these marriages which are marriage is just more dramatic than relationships, Like there's more at stake. I'm so excited and I can't wait to recap it for the podcast. And I hope all of our listeners make time out of their precious lives and their you know, time on earth to watch this show.
I definitely will be as soon as I get my TV. That's the first thing I'm playing.
And I'm just like Jack's much like Stassy is a movie star. And when I say moone star, I mean people, he's a housewife level. It's like Craig Conover, like you belong on television.
I agree, And I like kind of I'm sorry to say this, but I kind of feel that way about I definitely feel that way about James Kennedy, and I kind of feel that way about Tom Sandoval, where I'm like, you know what you are.
Doing, He's just not as smooth.
I'm he's not as smooth as like a Spencer Pratt with his acting, but like he is giving us what we need.
I'm so excited. We deserve this, Like us, we need this.
I'm flucking through this season of vander Pump and it's really like harmful to my mental health to see like nothing and just to see people fighting over like what I don't understand, like Sheena Schey stopping she has to sit back to back with Sandibal, Like I'm just like this is a waste in my fucking head, and She's like.
What about my problem?
And then it's like then Ariana goes on watch What Happens Live and Andy's like, so, how do you feel about the fact that, like Sina said that she wishes the Scandival drama was about her, and arian is like, I love her very I'm like, all right, well then fuck off. Then I just think like arian is not really that much of a star at all. I'm just kind of like, I don't care, you seem tired, drink a coffee, Like I don't know what to tell you.
I would not pay anything to see.
Her on Broadway, sorry to say, and I'm sorry she got cheated on, but she just does her and Katie as a duo.
I'm sleeping.
I like Katie.
I have always been someone who sticks up for Katie, and I felt for her when she was like, I do not know why we're talking about Sandaval anymore.
I I wish I didn't come to this. When she tears up like she's like this man was just.
Marr's very true. I really appreciated this scene because I like, I know what it's like for friends to like a guy's friends, to interfere with a relationship and to realize that your relationship like like a man won't stick up to you to his friends, and like when she just immediately teared up and was like he convinced people I was a monster, even my ex husband.
I think. I was like, this is yes, like he's a demon. She's correct. I mean, Sandon is so funny because he's like too stupid to be evil.
He is when he hammers the wall and he's like scanned of all.
I was like, oh my god, like you so stupid.
Well, I can't wait to keep our listeners updated. And I hope for a better season. I hope like the mid season trailer for Sandival, I mean Sandival, that may as well be what the show is called at this point for vander pump Rolls did get me a little optimistic, So hopefully we'll have more on that. I will continue to talk about The Bachelor. Kelsey A is my guest right now, and I'm really you know, hoping and praying.
Because I do love her as a person. She's such a dork.
When Joey was like, you know, giving her the card to read for the fantasy Suite, she took the key and goes.
I accept.
Oh my god, that's so cute. Is she the one from New Orleans?
Yes?
Okay, cool, Yeah, she's special. All right, Well, I have to go because I hate my life. But I love you all for dealing with me at my worst and my best. I love you, Devin, love you, Carol Roll.
It's true. True, it's a romantic love me, baby. I don't leave me, haggen. I want true
