G’day team, this one’s me, myself, and my end of year brain dump. A little Christmas wrap-up where I’m basically talking to the void and hoping it talks back in downloads.
I unpack what’s actually shifted this year, not just the highlight reel stuff. The Himalayas still has my heart in a chokehold, the Dandenongs became my weekly nervous system defrag, and jumping into Jacq’s speaking world cracked my routine wide open and handed me a whole new room of people, craft, and courage.
I also tell on myself, hard. How I can preach 'white belt energy' and 'you might have to get worse before you get better', then the second it’s go time I’m like... hell no, delete my calendar, fake my death. I went anyway... nearly pulled the pin, got terrified, did it scared, and reminded myself for the millionth time that the fear doesn’t go away because it matters.
Then it gets real real. I share the gut-punch of loss, and the strange, brutal beauty of letting grief exist without sprinting away from it. That reminder I keep coming back to in the philosophy that perhaps the good matches the bad in equal measure (and vice versa). We don’t get to numb one without numbing the other. So, I’m trying be conscious to stay present for the whole messy thing.
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