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What Do You Want When Nobody Needs Anything From You?

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What happens when a woman becomes so good at responding to everyone else’s needs that she completely loses connection to her own?

In this deeply reflective episode of Leading You, Julie Hyde explores a question that stops even the most capable women in their tracks:

“What do you want when nobody needs anything from you?”

It sounds simple. But for many high-performing women, the answer is far more difficult than expected.

This episode dives into why so many successful women lose touch with their own desires, needs and sense of self after years of being rewarded for competence, responsibility and reliability. Julie unpacks the hidden cost of constantly being the “safe pair of hands” — the person everyone depends on — and why that identity can quietly crowd out personal fulfilment, joy and direction.

Through stories from coaching clients and insights from years working with leaders and ambitious women, Julie explores:

  • Why high-performing women struggle to answer what they truly want
  • The difference between knowing what to do and knowing what you desire
  • How responsibility, identity and fear bury personal fulfilment
  • Why many women feel foggy, flat or disconnected despite looking successful on the outside
  • The emotional cost of constantly living in response mode
  • The role of people pleasing, obligation and performance identity
  • How to reconnect with yourself without needing to blow up your life
  • Why silence and space are essential for clarity
  • The danger of building a life around “should”
  • Small but powerful ways to reconnect with your own voice again

Julie also shares the story of a highly accomplished client who realised she had spent years knowing exactly what everyone else needed from her — but no longer knew what she needed for herself.

This episode is an invitation to pause long enough to ask yourself an honest question many women have not considered in years.

What do you actually want?

 

Timestamps:

00:00 Welcome and Big Question
02:15 Why the Silence Happens
02:41 Client Story Feeling Stuck
04:21 Doing Next vs Wanting
06:42 Three Ways Desire Gets Buried
11:32 The Hidden Cost of Not Knowing
12:25 Penny and Reconnecting
14:39 Three Starting Points
15:11 Silence and Small Questions
18:12 Separate Wants from Shoulds
19:32 Closing Reflection and Choice
21:25 Clarity Compass Invitation
22:07 Thanks and Goodbye

 

Links:
Learn more about my group coaching program here
Get the Clarity Compass here

 

Connect with Julie:
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/julie-hyde/
Instagram: @juliehydeleads
Website: https://juliehyde.com.au

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