Pick up the pieces of your life, pull them back together with the words you write, all the beauty and peace and the magic that you'll start too fun When you write your story, you get the words and said, don't you think it's time to let them out and write them down and cover what it's all about and write your story. Write you, write your story.

Pick up the pieces of your life, pull them back together with the words you write, all the beauty and peace and the magic that you'll start too fun When you write your story, you get the words and said, don't you think it's time to let them out and write them down and cover what it's all about and write your story. Write you, write your story.

Hi, and welcome back to the Write Your Story Podcast. This is Ali Fallon, I'm your host, and today is the last episode of this podcast for the year twenty twenty three. On today's episode, I wanted to talk about a topic that's really important to me, something that is a subject I've been teasing out over the course of the last ten plus years of my career. It's also a subject that's going to be really potent and powerful for you to take in and to understand, and absolutely vital for you to embody as you move through this process of writing your story and maybe even publishing that story and sharing with people beyond just you, so either family and friends or a wider network beyond that. This is a topic that's so important for you to understand. Otherwise, without really understanding what I'm going to talk about today, it's really easy to lose motivation in the creative process, it's very easy to forget your why, to lose track of why you're doing this in the first place. It's also possible to complete the objective at hand, meaning to write the story or to pitch to publishers, or to get the publishing contract, or to get the book out there, and to completely miss what was actually trying to happen inside of that process. That's about so much more than just the book itself, and so I want to make sure that I took a minute at the end of this year to talk about what's really happening when you sit down to the page to write a book. In my opinion and in my personal experience as a book coach, as a ghostwriter, as an author, myself watching this process take place over and over and over again in the past decade plus, I have witnessed this truth rise to the surface over and over again, and it's something that I really want people to understand who have this desire to sit down and write their story or write a book. I really think of this like an iceberg. I call this the iceberg effect, where you're invited into this process called writing your story, or maybe you're invited into this process called writing a book. Perhaps you feel like I have felt in the past, or like so many people I've worked with have felt, where you feel like this idea or this invitation showed up on your doorstep without you inviting it. You wasn't like you went out looking for this or seeking it. But it feels like this story idea or book idea or invitation to write just kind of appeared in front of you one day and started nagging at you, and almost isn't giving you a choice. It's almost just saying to you, Okay, we're going to go on this ride. You're going to write this thing. You're not going to totally understand what's going on, and you don't really get to say in the matter, this is happening whether you want it to happen or not. I don't know if you have felt like that, but I have most certainly felt like that, more so with certain writing projects than with other writing projects. But I've worked with a lot of clients who have also had this same kind of sensation. And if that's you, if you're feeling pulled or drawn or invited into this process kind of outside of your.

Hi, and welcome back to the Write Your Story Podcast. This is Ali Fallon, I'm your host, and today is the last episode of this podcast for the year twenty twenty three. On today's episode, I wanted to talk about a topic that's really important to me, something that is a subject I've been teasing out over the course of the last ten plus years of my career. It's also a subject that's going to be really potent and powerful for you to take in and to understand, and absolutely vital for you to embody as you move through this process of writing your story and maybe even publishing that story and sharing with people beyond just you, so either family and friends or a wider network beyond that. This is a topic that's so important for you to understand. Otherwise, without really understanding what I'm going to talk about today, it's really easy to lose motivation in the creative process, it's very easy to forget your why, to lose track of why you're doing this in the first place. It's also possible to complete the objective at hand, meaning to write the story or to pitch to publishers, or to get the publishing contract, or to get the book out there, and to completely miss what was actually trying to happen inside of that process. That's about so much more than just the book itself, and so I want to make sure that I took a minute at the end of this year to talk about what's really happening when you sit down to the page to write a book. In my opinion and in my personal experience as a book coach, as a ghostwriter, as an author, myself watching this process take place over and over and over again in the past decade plus, I have witnessed this truth rise to the surface over and over again, and it's something that I really want people to understand who have this desire to sit down and write their story or write a book. I really think of this like an iceberg. I call this the iceberg effect, where you're invited into this process called writing your story, or maybe you're invited into this process called writing a book. Perhaps you feel like I have felt in the past, or like so many people I've worked with have felt, where you feel like this idea or this invitation showed up on your doorstep without you inviting it. You wasn't like you went out looking for this or seeking it. But it feels like this story idea or book idea or invitation to write just kind of appeared in front of you one day and started nagging at you, and almost isn't giving you a choice. It's almost just saying to you, Okay, we're going to go on this ride. You're going to write this thing. You're not going to totally understand what's going on, and you don't really get to say in the matter, this is happening whether you want it to happen or not. I don't know if you have felt like that, but I have most certainly felt like that, more so with certain writing projects than with other writing projects. But I've worked with a lot of clients who have also had this same kind of sensation. And if that's you, if you're feeling pulled or drawn or invited into this process kind of outside of your.

Own will in a way.

Own will in a way.

Then it's really important to see that there's more happening for you in this process then you might realize. So the iceberg effect is just this idea that there's the part of this that you can see on the surface, and then there's ninety percent of the thing that exists under the surface of the water that you don't get to see with your physical senses. So you might be able to sense that it's there, but you don't get to physically see that it exists.

Then it's really important to see that there's more happening for you in this process then you might realize. So the iceberg effect is just this idea that there's the part of this that you can see on the surface, and then there's ninety percent of the thing that exists under the surface of the water that you don't get to see with your physical senses. So you might be able to sense that it's there, but you don't get to physically see that it exists.

So the ten.

So the ten.

Percent that exists above the water are things like I have a book idea that's part of the ten percent of the iceberg that exists above the water. Part of that ten percent might be I want to traditionally publish my book. I need to find a book agent. I signed a contract with XYZ Publisher. I finished my manuscript, I sold ten thousand copies. Those are things that exist above the surface of the water. They're things that you can witness with your eyes or with your senses, your physical senses. And then there's this whole host of things that are happening while you write a book that are not as easily observable. They are observable, but they are observable with a sixth sense, they're observable in a more spiritual sense. They're observable underneath the surface of the water. And you have to really tune in and pay attention if you want to be aware that these things exist. So just one really really simple example of that is, as you set off on this journey to write the story or write the book, you're going to uncover beliefs that you didn't know were there. You're going to write things on the page that when you see the words, you're going to go, oh, I didn't know I believed that. And maybe you've even had an experience like this. So when something like that happens, this is a great example of something that's taking place that's not easily quantifiable. It's not getting a publishing contract, writing a book proposal document, getting a six figure advance on your royalties, selling ten thousand copies, hitting the New York Times list, being on the Today Show, all these things that we talk about when we think about writing a book. It's something else, something sort of spiritual or something psychological, that's taking place, that's adding value to your life, and that's making a contribution to the world. But it might not be as outwardly obvious, like that ten percent of the iceberg is on the top of the water. So the idea of writing things down and uncovering beliefs that you didn't know you had before is just one of a hundred examples I could give you of things that are happening underneath the surface.

Percent that exists above the water are things like I have a book idea that's part of the ten percent of the iceberg that exists above the water. Part of that ten percent might be I want to traditionally publish my book. I need to find a book agent. I signed a contract with XYZ Publisher. I finished my manuscript, I sold ten thousand copies. Those are things that exist above the surface of the water. They're things that you can witness with your eyes or with your senses, your physical senses. And then there's this whole host of things that are happening while you write a book that are not as easily observable. They are observable, but they are observable with a sixth sense, they're observable in a more spiritual sense. They're observable underneath the surface of the water. And you have to really tune in and pay attention if you want to be aware that these things exist. So just one really really simple example of that is, as you set off on this journey to write the story or write the book, you're going to uncover beliefs that you didn't know were there. You're going to write things on the page that when you see the words, you're going to go, oh, I didn't know I believed that. And maybe you've even had an experience like this. So when something like that happens, this is a great example of something that's taking place that's not easily quantifiable. It's not getting a publishing contract, writing a book proposal document, getting a six figure advance on your royalties, selling ten thousand copies, hitting the New York Times list, being on the Today Show, all these things that we talk about when we think about writing a book. It's something else, something sort of spiritual or something psychological, that's taking place, that's adding value to your life, and that's making a contribution to the world. But it might not be as outwardly obvious, like that ten percent of the iceberg is on the top of the water. So the idea of writing things down and uncovering beliefs that you didn't know you had before is just one of a hundred examples I could give you of things that are happening underneath the surface.

Of the water.

Of the water.

I think, mostly what I want you to get, and I will list a couple of the things that are taking place below the surface while you're writing your story or working on a book. But I think mostly what I want you to get from this episode is just this that inside of this process, only a small percentage of it will be visible to other people, to your own physical senses, to your ego, self, your small self, whatever you want to call that, Only ten percent of it will be satisfying to that part of you, and the rest of what's taking place is actually the bulk of the matter. It's actually a greater part of the transformation. It's actually a greater part of the journey. It's actually a more significant contribution than that ten percent. It's the ninety percent. But if you aren't fully tuned into it, you may not totally recognize that this is happening. Let me give you another quick example of how this takes place for a lot of aspiring authors and storytellers.

I think, mostly what I want you to get, and I will list a couple of the things that are taking place below the surface while you're writing your story or working on a book. But I think mostly what I want you to get from this episode is just this that inside of this process, only a small percentage of it will be visible to other people, to your own physical senses, to your ego, self, your small self, whatever you want to call that, Only ten percent of it will be satisfying to that part of you, and the rest of what's taking place is actually the bulk of the matter. It's actually a greater part of the transformation. It's actually a greater part of the journey. It's actually a more significant contribution than that ten percent. It's the ninety percent. But if you aren't fully tuned into it, you may not totally recognize that this is happening. Let me give you another quick example of how this takes place for a lot of aspiring authors and storytellers.

Something I witness happen a.

Something I witness happen a.

Lot is people set off on a journey to let's say, complete a manuscript or complete a project, and they map out a timeline for themselves and they do what I recommend people do, which is to put the writing sessions on your calendar, to treat them like any other activity that you would on your calendar. You're not going to cancel those things unless there's an emergency, or you're sick, or someone that you are in charge of taking care of us sick. So just like a doctor's appointment or a dentist appointment, or a lunch with a friend, you're not going to cancel it unless there's a really good reason to cancel it. You treat your writing sessions just like that, and one of a couple of things can happen, one of which is you sit down to the page, you write five hundred or one thousand words, and when you go back and reread what you've written, you just think to yourself, like, oh, this sucks, this is not what I'm trying to write. The words that are coming out are not reflecting the message that I'm trying to share, and you start to get really down on yourself. Another way that this comes through is you sit down to the page to get some writing done and just no words come at all. You might sit there and stare at a blinking cursor and think, after three or four or five writing sessions, like, what's the wait, what am I even doing? Why am I sitting down here and working on this writing project when I'm clearly not making any progress. I could go make progress on something different.

Lot is people set off on a journey to let's say, complete a manuscript or complete a project, and they map out a timeline for themselves and they do what I recommend people do, which is to put the writing sessions on your calendar, to treat them like any other activity that you would on your calendar. You're not going to cancel those things unless there's an emergency, or you're sick, or someone that you are in charge of taking care of us sick. So just like a doctor's appointment or a dentist appointment, or a lunch with a friend, you're not going to cancel it unless there's a really good reason to cancel it. You treat your writing sessions just like that, and one of a couple of things can happen, one of which is you sit down to the page, you write five hundred or one thousand words, and when you go back and reread what you've written, you just think to yourself, like, oh, this sucks, this is not what I'm trying to write. The words that are coming out are not reflecting the message that I'm trying to share, and you start to get really down on yourself. Another way that this comes through is you sit down to the page to get some writing done and just no words come at all. You might sit there and stare at a blinking cursor and think, after three or four or five writing sessions, like, what's the wait, what am I even doing? Why am I sitting down here and working on this writing project when I'm clearly not making any progress. I could go make progress on something different.

And if you're not.

And if you're not.

Aware of the iceberg effect, if you're not aware of the fact that getting the quote unquote right words onto the page is only ten percent of the iceberg and that ninety percent of it is something other than that, then you're very likely to give up. You're very likely to get into a shame spiral. And even if you are able to sort of force yourself to stay in this process, the process is not fluid. It doesn't have any flow in it doesn't have any joy in it for you. And maybe you finish a book, maybe you publish a book, maybe you even get a book on the New York Times list. But you miss out on the bigger part of the process that's trying to take place for you when you write a book. This is why it's so important to me that you understand that there's more happening than what you can see when you're working on a writing project. There's what we already talked about, which is that there's a clarification of what you believe. You have beliefs, latent beliefs that are lurking under the surface of your conscious mind that are operating on autopilot all the time that you can't see or understand until you put them on the page. So the process of writing your story, or writing a book, or working on any kind of writing project is going to inevitably show those beliefs to you, allow you to examine them, and if need be, allow you to upgrade them or change them, or edit them or delete them, if that's what the situation calls for. And I want to emphasize that this is taking place whether or not you ever finish your writing assignment. It's taking place whether or not you ever publish it. It's taking place whether or not you ever get an agent or get a book deal, or get a advance on royalties or get on a best seller's list. So those things, those elements of the writing process are fine aspirations to have and wonderful even aspirations to have. I have many of those aspirations, but they're only ten percent of what's taking place. You know, something else that's going on while you're working on a writing project is that you're learning a process of what it looks like to be receptive to what's trying to be shared through you. Because it's one thing to say, like, here's what I want to share, here's the message that I want to communicate, here's the story that I want to come through, And it's something very different to receive the message that wants.

Aware of the iceberg effect, if you're not aware of the fact that getting the quote unquote right words onto the page is only ten percent of the iceberg and that ninety percent of it is something other than that, then you're very likely to give up. You're very likely to get into a shame spiral. And even if you are able to sort of force yourself to stay in this process, the process is not fluid. It doesn't have any flow in it doesn't have any joy in it for you. And maybe you finish a book, maybe you publish a book, maybe you even get a book on the New York Times list. But you miss out on the bigger part of the process that's trying to take place for you when you write a book. This is why it's so important to me that you understand that there's more happening than what you can see when you're working on a writing project. There's what we already talked about, which is that there's a clarification of what you believe. You have beliefs, latent beliefs that are lurking under the surface of your conscious mind that are operating on autopilot all the time that you can't see or understand until you put them on the page. So the process of writing your story, or writing a book, or working on any kind of writing project is going to inevitably show those beliefs to you, allow you to examine them, and if need be, allow you to upgrade them or change them, or edit them or delete them, if that's what the situation calls for. And I want to emphasize that this is taking place whether or not you ever finish your writing assignment. It's taking place whether or not you ever publish it. It's taking place whether or not you ever get an agent or get a book deal, or get a advance on royalties or get on a best seller's list. So those things, those elements of the writing process are fine aspirations to have and wonderful even aspirations to have. I have many of those aspirations, but they're only ten percent of what's taking place. You know, something else that's going on while you're working on a writing project is that you're learning a process of what it looks like to be receptive to what's trying to be shared through you. Because it's one thing to say, like, here's what I want to share, here's the message that I want to communicate, here's the story that I want to come through, And it's something very different to receive the message that wants.

To be shared through you.

To be shared through you.

This is a skill that we're not taught in school, that isn't really celebrated in the broader culture, that isn't celebrated in most workplaces, that isn't celebrated in many places in our lives. But that is an absolutely essential skill to creativity, and writing your story will teach you how to stand in that position of receptivity. It teaches you how to stand in a position of surrender, because of course, when you sit down to do a task like write your story. You have intentions and objectives and hopeful aspirations, but then you also have the reality of the fact that you can't muscle this thing into place like you could other things in your life. When you are involved in a creative project, you have the experience where you realize, I don't have total control over this. I have to try to dance with this thing. I have to try to listen as much as I'm talking and try to hear what this thing wants to say to me, so that I can be the transmitter of the message to the people who are here to receive what I have to say. A great example of this is when I was writing what would have been my second book, I was still married, I was in my first marriage spoiler alert that marriage ended, and I was writing a book that was meant to be about marriage. The book was supposed to be called Our First Years, and it was supposed to follow the story of our first couple of years of marriage and talk about how and why the first few years of marriage can be so tricky for people. I was really working hard on writing this book. I was contracted to have the manuscript finished, and no matter what, I did to try to get the words out on the page.

This is a skill that we're not taught in school, that isn't really celebrated in the broader culture, that isn't celebrated in most workplaces, that isn't celebrated in many places in our lives. But that is an absolutely essential skill to creativity, and writing your story will teach you how to stand in that position of receptivity. It teaches you how to stand in a position of surrender, because of course, when you sit down to do a task like write your story. You have intentions and objectives and hopeful aspirations, but then you also have the reality of the fact that you can't muscle this thing into place like you could other things in your life. When you are involved in a creative project, you have the experience where you realize, I don't have total control over this. I have to try to dance with this thing. I have to try to listen as much as I'm talking and try to hear what this thing wants to say to me, so that I can be the transmitter of the message to the people who are here to receive what I have to say. A great example of this is when I was writing what would have been my second book, I was still married, I was in my first marriage spoiler alert that marriage ended, and I was writing a book that was meant to be about marriage. The book was supposed to be called Our First Years, and it was supposed to follow the story of our first couple of years of marriage and talk about how and why the first few years of marriage can be so tricky for people. I was really working hard on writing this book. I was contracted to have the manuscript finished, and no matter what, I did to try to get the words out on the page.

I just simply could not do it.

I just simply could not do it.

I couldn't get the words to sound the way that I wanted them to sound, or to feel the way that I wanted them to feel. I was trying to connect with the reader in this certain kind of way and contribute something really helpful and supportive. And yet as I was telling the stories from my life that were supposed to be the vehicle for this message, it just wasn't computing. It wasn't fitting together, and for really good reason, because my marriage was about to fall apart. Within weeks after I started really seriously working on this manuscript, my marriage fell apart, and I realized that I was trying to say a message that I couldn't say inside of the current container I was living in. And so the writing project took me on a journey where it completely altered the life that I was living. It altered the container that I was living in, and all of that needed to take place so that I could deliver the message that I was trying to deliver, which is the message of indestructible, and Indestructible ended up being my second book. Another thing that's happening below the surface of the water when you're working on a writing project, and this is particularly true if you're working on a personal story from your life, but even if you're working on a nonfiction book, this would be true as well, which is that you are reliving some of the experiences from your past in order to see them through a new lens. When you have an experience in your life, you can only have the experience from the inside, especially the first time that you're living in it's really challenging to have an out cider's perspective when you're inside of the experience having it. So a lot of times we'll have experiences in our lives that feel quite traumatic, and part of what makes them feel traumatic is that we don't have a broader perspective on the experience. We only have the experience from inside of our own bodies. And so writing as a tool can feel incredibly healing because we get to go back and relive the experience and see it from the narrator's point of view. The narrator's point of view is a much higher point of view than the hero's point of view. The narrator's point of view is a thirty thousand foot view. We get to see the beginning and the end of the story. We get to see such a broader perspective of what's taken place, and that can be an amazingly healing experience. And this is one of the things that's happening under the surface of the water while you're working on a writing project. In other words, you do not have to publish a book for this to take place. You do not have to be on a best seller's list, I have to sell a single copy. All you have to do is show up to the process, and you get that benefit just because you did it. Another thing that's happening under the surface of the water when you're working on a writing project, and I know this might sound really lofty, but it's true. I've watched this play out over and over and over again in my own life and with my clients, is that you're dealing with shame. Because shame and creativity are incompatible. You cannot create from shame, or all you'll create is more shame and it just collapses in on itself. And so, you know, one really practical way that creativity allows you to deal with shame is it just teaches you to keep showing up to this thing over and over and over again, even when what you create isn't what you envisioned it would be. Ira Glass has this amazing video from maybe ten years ago where he talks about the gap between what you know good art is because you have amazing taste. You have incredible taste in art and in this case, probably incredible taste in books. You've been reading books since you were little.

I couldn't get the words to sound the way that I wanted them to sound, or to feel the way that I wanted them to feel. I was trying to connect with the reader in this certain kind of way and contribute something really helpful and supportive. And yet as I was telling the stories from my life that were supposed to be the vehicle for this message, it just wasn't computing. It wasn't fitting together, and for really good reason, because my marriage was about to fall apart. Within weeks after I started really seriously working on this manuscript, my marriage fell apart, and I realized that I was trying to say a message that I couldn't say inside of the current container I was living in. And so the writing project took me on a journey where it completely altered the life that I was living. It altered the container that I was living in, and all of that needed to take place so that I could deliver the message that I was trying to deliver, which is the message of indestructible, and Indestructible ended up being my second book. Another thing that's happening below the surface of the water when you're working on a writing project, and this is particularly true if you're working on a personal story from your life, but even if you're working on a nonfiction book, this would be true as well, which is that you are reliving some of the experiences from your past in order to see them through a new lens. When you have an experience in your life, you can only have the experience from the inside, especially the first time that you're living in it's really challenging to have an out cider's perspective when you're inside of the experience having it. So a lot of times we'll have experiences in our lives that feel quite traumatic, and part of what makes them feel traumatic is that we don't have a broader perspective on the experience. We only have the experience from inside of our own bodies. And so writing as a tool can feel incredibly healing because we get to go back and relive the experience and see it from the narrator's point of view. The narrator's point of view is a much higher point of view than the hero's point of view. The narrator's point of view is a thirty thousand foot view. We get to see the beginning and the end of the story. We get to see such a broader perspective of what's taken place, and that can be an amazingly healing experience. And this is one of the things that's happening under the surface of the water while you're working on a writing project. In other words, you do not have to publish a book for this to take place. You do not have to be on a best seller's list, I have to sell a single copy. All you have to do is show up to the process, and you get that benefit just because you did it. Another thing that's happening under the surface of the water when you're working on a writing project, and I know this might sound really lofty, but it's true. I've watched this play out over and over and over again in my own life and with my clients, is that you're dealing with shame. Because shame and creativity are incompatible. You cannot create from shame, or all you'll create is more shame and it just collapses in on itself. And so, you know, one really practical way that creativity allows you to deal with shame is it just teaches you to keep showing up to this thing over and over and over again, even when what you create isn't what you envisioned it would be. Ira Glass has this amazing video from maybe ten years ago where he talks about the gap between what you know good art is because you have amazing taste. You have incredible taste in art and in this case, probably incredible taste in books. You've been reading books since you were little.

You love books.

You love books.

You have these authors who you read and adore and admire and think they're incredible, and they are incredible, and you know what good writing looks like. And then you go to execute on your writing and you know that your writing doesn't meet the mark. So there's this gap between what you can create and what you know is good art. And your job is about closing that gap. But let me tell you one thing for certain, you will not be able to close that gap if you feel shame about that gap. So I know this sounds really simple, but this is what I'm getting at is that if you can continue to show up to this process even when you don't see quote unquote progress above the surface of the water, what you will begin to experience is all this movement and all this healing and all this wholeness and completion and everything that's happening underneath the surface of the water. That's really the bulk of what's trying to happen. Anyway, Then the ten percent becomes icing on the cake. The ten percent becomes like amazing. I sold ten thousand copies. I got to make this contribution. I got to connect to this community of people through my art. But I got to connect not from a place of shame. I got to connect from a place of wholeness. I got to connect from a place of joy. I got to connect from a place of fullness, from abundance, from peace, instead of connecting from shame, fear, regret, pain, All those things can play a role in our story. But the place that we want to connect from, the energy that we want to connect from, is much higher than shame and pain and fear, which brings me really nicely to this final thing that I want to say about what happens when you sit down to a writing project to write your story or to write a book, which is that this process will inevitably transform you into the kind of person who has the authority to deliver this message currently, right now, at the beginning of this process, you and I do not have the authority to deliver the message that we're trying to deliver. Let me give you a really simplified example of this, which is that I've been teaching these write your Story workshops in person for the past couple of years. I've taught six of them, and the first five that I taught were before I ever wrote the manuscript for the book, and the last one I taught was after I wrote the manuscript for the book. And I'll let you guess which of those five workshops I felt most prepared for. I felt most confident about which one had the greatest impact, which one made the greatest contribution, which one did I get the most feedback about how helpful my teaching was, about how thorough it was, about how fully embodied the message was. Of course, I would get that kind of feedback after I've written the manuscript, because after I've written the manuscript, I've fully clarified what I believe about this thing. I've fully fleshed out the answers to all of my own questions, which are also your questions. I've learned what it means to allow the message to come through me and to be delivered to you not as a thing that I created in my own brain, but as a thing that is bigger.

You have these authors who you read and adore and admire and think they're incredible, and they are incredible, and you know what good writing looks like. And then you go to execute on your writing and you know that your writing doesn't meet the mark. So there's this gap between what you can create and what you know is good art. And your job is about closing that gap. But let me tell you one thing for certain, you will not be able to close that gap if you feel shame about that gap. So I know this sounds really simple, but this is what I'm getting at is that if you can continue to show up to this process even when you don't see quote unquote progress above the surface of the water, what you will begin to experience is all this movement and all this healing and all this wholeness and completion and everything that's happening underneath the surface of the water. That's really the bulk of what's trying to happen. Anyway, Then the ten percent becomes icing on the cake. The ten percent becomes like amazing. I sold ten thousand copies. I got to make this contribution. I got to connect to this community of people through my art. But I got to connect not from a place of shame. I got to connect from a place of wholeness. I got to connect from a place of joy. I got to connect from a place of fullness, from abundance, from peace, instead of connecting from shame, fear, regret, pain, All those things can play a role in our story. But the place that we want to connect from, the energy that we want to connect from, is much higher than shame and pain and fear, which brings me really nicely to this final thing that I want to say about what happens when you sit down to a writing project to write your story or to write a book, which is that this process will inevitably transform you into the kind of person who has the authority to deliver this message currently, right now, at the beginning of this process, you and I do not have the authority to deliver the message that we're trying to deliver. Let me give you a really simplified example of this, which is that I've been teaching these write your Story workshops in person for the past couple of years. I've taught six of them, and the first five that I taught were before I ever wrote the manuscript for the book, and the last one I taught was after I wrote the manuscript for the book. And I'll let you guess which of those five workshops I felt most prepared for. I felt most confident about which one had the greatest impact, which one made the greatest contribution, which one did I get the most feedback about how helpful my teaching was, about how thorough it was, about how fully embodied the message was. Of course, I would get that kind of feedback after I've written the manuscript, because after I've written the manuscript, I've fully clarified what I believe about this thing. I've fully fleshed out the answers to all of my own questions, which are also your questions. I've learned what it means to allow the message to come through me and to be delivered to you not as a thing that I created in my own brain, but as a thing that is bigger.

And beyond me.

And beyond me.

I've relived and categorized my own experiences with this concept over and over again and really understood them on a deeper level, and I have become the kind of person who now has the authority to very confidently deliver this message to you and to anyone else who's ready to hear it. So this is the ninety percent. That's what's going on. When you sit down to work on a writing project, You're becoming the person who has the authority to deliver this message. Which is why when I hear people say, well, I could never write a book because I don't have an Instagram following, or I don't know the first thing about publishing, or I wouldn't know how to get a book contract, or I don't really want to share this story with hundreds of thousands of people, or you know, I could never be a New York Times wustlling author. I'm not good at grammar, I'm not a real writer. All of these things that I hear people say, I have to think, Okay, well, then you don't really understand what is being asked of you and what you're being invited into when you're invited into a writing project, because everything that you just listed is only ten percent of what's going on. The ninety percent is the part that carries much more weight, And the ninety percent is what's really trying to happen with you, and the ten percent is just like whatever, who cares. If I've got the ninety percent, the ten percent I'm totally unattached to. And if it happens, it's wonderful and it's great. But if it doesn't happen, it doesn't mean that I didn't accomplish my objective. That I came here to accomplish what you are coming here to accomplish, which when you write your story is to deal with your own shame, to clarify what you believe, to transform into the kind of person who has the authority to deliver this message. To relive those experiences so that you can heal them, To upgrade the moral that you made of that story so that it doesn't live in your body as a trauma. In the same kind of a way. You can release that, you can move on to the next phase. You can grow and evolve past it. And that's the ninety percent of what's trying to take place when you're invited into this process. So I don't know where this lands with you. I don't know where you are right now. I don't know if you have that same kind of sense that you're being invited into a writing project.

I've relived and categorized my own experiences with this concept over and over again and really understood them on a deeper level, and I have become the kind of person who now has the authority to very confidently deliver this message to you and to anyone else who's ready to hear it. So this is the ninety percent. That's what's going on. When you sit down to work on a writing project, You're becoming the person who has the authority to deliver this message. Which is why when I hear people say, well, I could never write a book because I don't have an Instagram following, or I don't know the first thing about publishing, or I wouldn't know how to get a book contract, or I don't really want to share this story with hundreds of thousands of people, or you know, I could never be a New York Times wustlling author. I'm not good at grammar, I'm not a real writer. All of these things that I hear people say, I have to think, Okay, well, then you don't really understand what is being asked of you and what you're being invited into when you're invited into a writing project, because everything that you just listed is only ten percent of what's going on. The ninety percent is the part that carries much more weight, And the ninety percent is what's really trying to happen with you, and the ten percent is just like whatever, who cares. If I've got the ninety percent, the ten percent I'm totally unattached to. And if it happens, it's wonderful and it's great. But if it doesn't happen, it doesn't mean that I didn't accomplish my objective. That I came here to accomplish what you are coming here to accomplish, which when you write your story is to deal with your own shame, to clarify what you believe, to transform into the kind of person who has the authority to deliver this message. To relive those experiences so that you can heal them, To upgrade the moral that you made of that story so that it doesn't live in your body as a trauma. In the same kind of a way. You can release that, you can move on to the next phase. You can grow and evolve past it. And that's the ninety percent of what's trying to take place when you're invited into this process. So I don't know where this lands with you. I don't know where you are right now. I don't know if you have that same kind of sense that you're being invited into a writing project.

Maybe you feel like it is a book.

Maybe you feel like it is a book.

I know I'm supposed to write a book, and I'm resisting because I'm scared. I'm resisting because I don't feel like a real writer. I'm resisting because I have imposter syndrome. I'm resisting because I have all of these excuses for why this could never work. I don't know if that's you, but if it is you, I just want to offer you this encouragement that, just like Paul Young talked about on the episode last week, if all you ever do is write the friggin thing and print it and hand it to twelve people, you've done your job. And that is so much of what this podcast is about. This is the message I want to deliver with my life. Is this invitation into the writing life has nothing to do with copies sold. Nothing. Zero copies sold are nice, they're icing on the cake. It is a reflection of the connection that you get to make with the audience that you're here to serve. So it is a wonderful, beautiful way to externally measure how big that connection has become. But a better question to me than how big is that connection is how deep does it run? How deep does it run in you? How much of an authority do you feel that you are to deliver this message that you came here to share. In Utimately, do you understand what the creative process is here to show you? How much are you receiving that? Are you taking it in? Are you surrendering to it? Are you dancing with it? Are you learning from it? And only when you do that will you be able to connect with a broader audience. Paul Jung is a fabulous example of this. He was living this. It was in his bones, deep down into every cell. He did this for the right reasons, and because he connected deeply with himself, he was able to connect deeply with others as well. I'm not saying that you can't hit the New York Times list while being completely unaware of the ninety percent under the surface of the water. You absolutely can, But you might miss out on the most important thing that this experience is trying to offer you. And that's what my hope is for you, is that you don't miss out on the most important thing that this experience is trying to offer you. I want to make sure that you're present for that. The offer to write a book with me next year still stands. I'm walking a small group of people through the process of writing their manuscripts in twenty twenty four, and there's still time to join us. We will begin coursework January third, twenty twenty four, and we will work together for six months to complete a manuscript. And what we're working on together is the one hundred percent. I'm going to teach a lot about the ten percent, because that matters, But what I am really inviting this group of writers into is the ninety percent. That's weightier and more important than any of the rest of it. So if that sounds supportive to you, if it sounds interesting to you, if you have a deep knowing that you're meant to write a book and that next year is a time to do it, I would love to have you be part of that with us. You can register for that program at a book in six months dot com. What it will include is videos and weekly assignments that you complete in your own time. Every other week, we will meet together as a group to do coaching where you'll get opportunities to have direct feedback on your work, and at the end of six months, you will have a completed manuscript. You'll get to walk away with a completed manuscript of your book.

I know I'm supposed to write a book, and I'm resisting because I'm scared. I'm resisting because I don't feel like a real writer. I'm resisting because I have imposter syndrome. I'm resisting because I have all of these excuses for why this could never work. I don't know if that's you, but if it is you, I just want to offer you this encouragement that, just like Paul Young talked about on the episode last week, if all you ever do is write the friggin thing and print it and hand it to twelve people, you've done your job. And that is so much of what this podcast is about. This is the message I want to deliver with my life. Is this invitation into the writing life has nothing to do with copies sold. Nothing. Zero copies sold are nice, they're icing on the cake. It is a reflection of the connection that you get to make with the audience that you're here to serve. So it is a wonderful, beautiful way to externally measure how big that connection has become. But a better question to me than how big is that connection is how deep does it run? How deep does it run in you? How much of an authority do you feel that you are to deliver this message that you came here to share. In Utimately, do you understand what the creative process is here to show you? How much are you receiving that? Are you taking it in? Are you surrendering to it? Are you dancing with it? Are you learning from it? And only when you do that will you be able to connect with a broader audience. Paul Jung is a fabulous example of this. He was living this. It was in his bones, deep down into every cell. He did this for the right reasons, and because he connected deeply with himself, he was able to connect deeply with others as well. I'm not saying that you can't hit the New York Times list while being completely unaware of the ninety percent under the surface of the water. You absolutely can, But you might miss out on the most important thing that this experience is trying to offer you. And that's what my hope is for you, is that you don't miss out on the most important thing that this experience is trying to offer you. I want to make sure that you're present for that. The offer to write a book with me next year still stands. I'm walking a small group of people through the process of writing their manuscripts in twenty twenty four, and there's still time to join us. We will begin coursework January third, twenty twenty four, and we will work together for six months to complete a manuscript. And what we're working on together is the one hundred percent. I'm going to teach a lot about the ten percent, because that matters, But what I am really inviting this group of writers into is the ninety percent. That's weightier and more important than any of the rest of it. So if that sounds supportive to you, if it sounds interesting to you, if you have a deep knowing that you're meant to write a book and that next year is a time to do it, I would love to have you be part of that with us. You can register for that program at a book in six months dot com. What it will include is videos and weekly assignments that you complete in your own time. Every other week, we will meet together as a group to do coaching where you'll get opportunities to have direct feedback on your work, and at the end of six months, you will have a completed manuscript. You'll get to walk away with a completed manuscript of your book.

So if that.

So if that.

Sounds interesting to you, I would love to have you join us a book in six months dot Com will begin coursework on January third. But whether you're going to join us for that experience or not, what I really want you to hear from this episode is that when that opportunity knocks on your door and you feel invited into a writing project, there's something that's trying to happen for you that has nothing to do with the book. It has nothing to do with who's going to read it, or who's going to publish it, or what kind of list it's going to be on or not going to be on. It has everything to do with who you're evolving into, with how your life is inviting you to transform and to evolve. And I get so excited about that. It makes me so filled with passion and with joy to be able to assist you in that kind of an evolution. And so I'm so grateful to have you here. This has been one of the highlights of my whole year, is hosting this show and getting to connect with each of you. So I wish you so much love and so much peace and so much joy over this holiday season. I wish you all the fullness of the ninety percent of the transformation that's trying to happen for you inside of this process.

Sounds interesting to you, I would love to have you join us a book in six months dot Com will begin coursework on January third. But whether you're going to join us for that experience or not, what I really want you to hear from this episode is that when that opportunity knocks on your door and you feel invited into a writing project, there's something that's trying to happen for you that has nothing to do with the book. It has nothing to do with who's going to read it, or who's going to publish it, or what kind of list it's going to be on or not going to be on. It has everything to do with who you're evolving into, with how your life is inviting you to transform and to evolve. And I get so excited about that. It makes me so filled with passion and with joy to be able to assist you in that kind of an evolution. And so I'm so grateful to have you here. This has been one of the highlights of my whole year, is hosting this show and getting to connect with each of you. So I wish you so much love and so much peace and so much joy over this holiday season. I wish you all the fullness of the ninety percent of the transformation that's trying to happen for you inside of this process.

And I'm sending you so much love and I can't wait to connect with you again in the new year. Maybe you go play with the kiddy while mommy finishes to record. Okay, I can't even nowhere. I can't see her.

And I'm sending you so much love and I can't wait to connect with you again in the new year. Maybe you go play with the kiddy while mommy finishes to record. Okay, I can't even nowhere. I can't see her.

Well, she's downstairs, Summer, got to go find her. Maybe she's playing hide seek, but I don't. Maybe so I think she is. I think she's like Nola, come find me.

Well, she's downstairs, Summer, got to go find her. Maybe she's playing hide seek, but I don't. Maybe so I think she is. I think she's like Nola, come find me.

Did you even talk? Well, she's like maral Ma, Maria Merrel. Yeah, she's wake down. Can you say hi? And welcome to the Write Your Story Podcast? Hi, and too the Welcome Story Podcast. Say welcome to uh Write Your Story Podcast? Right?

Did you even talk? Well, she's like maral Ma, Maria Merrel. Yeah, she's wake down. Can you say hi? And welcome to the Write Your Story Podcast? Hi, and too the Welcome Story Podcast. Say welcome to uh Write Your Story Podcast? Right?

You two to Write Your Story podcast

You two to Write Your Story podcast