Live from Oakland!
Today, this is what's important:
Ders missing, Bay Area slang, finger prints & buttholes, baydestrians, the 69th birthday, resin highs, hot topics, Q&A, & more.
Welcome to This is important a production of iHeartRadio, the show where we only talk about what's obviously most crucially integral to the fabric of our very nature.
Today we talk about.
I'm the Jeffrey Dahmer of jizin on every part of my room.
Sparts were so open in my household that it is now my love language.
I'm about to eat my weight in shrimpap.
Here we go, start your engines. M m m m m m m m m ming ming ming ming ming ming ming ming ming, and we're not invited back back. Hey, whoa eh whoa good death be here. It's really good to be here, Bay Area. About a hot energy come back by the ground or night here in the bad.
Harry, you should be up coming breakfast or somebody.
Let's get into this ship, Oakland. I love you baby. There he goes. You got him? Tell him if you got him. I want to kick it off stage.
Wick this off stage, really bad job kicking there you got there?
You go.
There, you a big bat dick. Come in front. My fucking microphone is all up in my ship.
Bro, you were a lot of people would say you're too you were too Hyphe.
Dude was way too, highee. That's what a lot of people here, I think, Hauld said. I don't know if you can't get too hyphe word in the dude, that is true, It's impossible.
Yeah, I mean I feel like I already saw a homeless guy ghosts writing his shopping cart.
Yeah, that's his whip.
That is whip that you can still call that really that counts?
Yeah, yeah, there it is.
And so as you could probably talk. I got a ton of room up here on this fucking couch.
Something is off.
What is it like?
What is going on? Well, you know what, Huh? We cut some dead weight. We cut Yeah, we did.
Now Jorge is uh uh being a total bitch and he is having a family emergency.
Bitch, shut up? Yes, yeah, but I guess it is serious, and YadA YadA.
He couldn't make it so that we fucking hate him for it and we're forever gonna shoot on him for this.
Yeah.
No, guys, we have a lot of power in this situation. I want everybody to go in his fucking d M.
Yeah, tonight, three thousand people in his DM saying shut up, bitch.
I don't even want it to be like aggressive. I want everybody to write really sad shit like rich.
Actually a good call because I would really affect him more because if everyone just goes you're a bitch, he'll be like, I know, yeah, but if you were to be like you were always my favorite one? Yeah right, And I didn't get actually you know where. Obviously we came for Blake and Kyler from the Bay and that means a lot to us. It's good to be fucking home baby, yes, and to be holed. And obviously they felt the love. But secretly, I don't like the little one love the big one, and that's you.
Yep. And we didn't get the chance to see you tonight.
But do you think Jurs is capable of feeling that guilt that we would be putting on him?
Absolutely not.
No.
That's why I wish I could take some ship back, Like I wish I could like undo going to the motherfucker's wedding.
Fuck that. Yeah, yeah, there's a lot of things we should take back. This is my hometown show, damn it.
Yeah.
And when you know how important this fucking shit is to be Yeah, that's right, that's right. I just lost the fucking age the Las Vegas this week, That's right.
Bro, we don't need to this is okay, just because someone in his family maybe maybe close to death. We're not exactly sure you should say that to him. You should say you know how important the a's are to me? And I think that would resonate.
Yeah, say Oakland is down bad right now, and we wouldn't need a healthy dose of durs dick.
Yeah, yeah, to stir the pot.
I wanted to see those because you know, he's got the longest hanging fruit of the bump.
He's got a big one. He's got a big yeah. No, I'll admit it, the biggest cock of the crew. Honestly, I wasn't ready to say in it.
I wasn't ready I need to say it until Halloween and he wore that chucky outfit.
Oh my god. Oh the boy had a package. The boy had a package. Dude. I thought he had a few buzzballs up in the mix. Yeah.
And part of him was like, ah, no, dude, so you're you're like a grow You're a show or not a grower, right, And he's like, no, it gross.
I'm like, I like to do that thing grows.
I really love that. That's how good of friends we are. We came out here to shit on durs and we're just giving him.
The most disciplement and he's not even here. We're like, bro, you got the biggest page and I'm looking rock bro.
You know, was it forty years old? We're all like, I just turned forty dress forty, I'm wrong. He might be fifty forty nine, I think, yeah, and then thank you, and then you guys are turning forty this next year. The fact that we still the best compliment to get would be you've got an awesome dick. Yeah, not like is that's for sure like a compliment you want to hear when you're like nineteen years old, because you're like, is it awesome?
I have no idea. I hope someone finds it awesome.
Yeah. Once you get our age and you're like, yo, dude, you got like a super sick dick, it's like.
We should be offended. Just be like, hey, don't talk about my dick. I have a family.
Yeah, you're legit not allowed to my son's second birthday anymore.
But we're so like Bayeria, yeah my dig Yeah.
I love repping Oakland, I do, but to be told, I am from conquered.
Yeah yeah, where's conquered at Oh, we got conquered in the building.
So they made they made the hike. I remember, dude, how far is conquered from Oakland? Conquered's like good thirty five minute drive.
So a lot of people are screaming.
That's when I know you're lying, because no, I'm not lying, you know, because that's what people always do when they live a little bit outside of the city. They go like, it's actually not even that, it's not that bar. It actually takes me like twenty minutes. I get I can get there quick. I mean, it's quicker on Bart. Keep it real, dude, Yes, sir, it's it's quicker if you take is Bart.
Bart is the cause of a diarrhea. There's just diarrhea everywhere on Bart. It's a real bam. I've never traveled. I don't think I've ever traveled. I'm sure. Yes, yes, there is diarrheon. Bart can get it. Yeah, there is a train that has diarrhea. And yeah it's got some spray on the walls.
All the barred trains, you're guaranteeing that at least one of them.
I would bet two hundred thousand dollars. There's hey, at least a speckle of diarrhea in one.
Of the costs, So you'd have to get CSI out there to find it.
Oh, we get MTV room raiders with the purple light like du oh ship dude, you just unlock something. I remember when I saw that for the first time, I was like, oh, I would be so fucked oh d That was one of our our first sketch I is.
That we ended up not doing was do an MTV Room raider of my room and then you go in and it looks like a fucking jizz death scene. Yes, yes, every Jeffrey Dahmer of jizzying on every part of my room.
It's marking territory, that's all that is. It's dropping your seed.
There's just come everywhere. Wait, you squeeze the toothpaste that even the toothpaste is come.
How did that happen? You're still beating off into the little toothpaste hole. I don't know why. I'm a freak like that. Wow.
Yeah, that minty freshness gets me going.
Baby, I'm sure there's health benefits to brushing your teeth with com Let's.
Keep it real, okay, and Kyle, all right, and and and our families are here. Yeah, why the fuck did you say something so brave, so brave, thank.
You, thank you, but do not controversial? Yeah, but we don't talk about it enough, but I would. And I also don't know if something we don't talk about that, and I don't know if scientifically there's anything to it. I'm just saying maybe there's something scientific well, because science.
Has ruined us as a society, and there's a sea of freaks out there, right, oh yes, like people fuck absolutely everything, including toothpaste. I'm sure there's a subreddit for that being like, have you guys actually tried it? And then there's forty little horny fucks from around the world being.
Like, yeah, fuck the tube. Uh so yeah, fuck the tube.
For sure, there's people saying that actually there's some hell benefits, right, Michael used to be shitty.
I feel like I saw this though.
I feel like this was like HBO real sex or something like that, Like there, what the fuck is that?
Do you see that? Bug? Are you good? Dude?
That's the most that has not happened in any other city. That's the most Bay Area shit I've ever since.
It's got a huge horse fly.
One house fly just bothering using just straight pestilence.
It's just from the Bible. I have something.
I think that the doors are gonna blow open a bunch of fucking locus.
Of course, that happens in the bay. Everything starts in the bay. Oh there we go.
Oh yeah, like other people claim Hella, Hella is not from anywhere but the bed. Hey hey, the one who's not here, who we shall not name wonders claims it fucking was started in Chicago, which is absolute trash.
It's fucking trash. Yeah, no, nope, nope nope. And is that real? Bam? What that is that Hella started here? Or the cum thing?
I thought we moved off with the com thing, but I know that you want to go back to No.
I just have a I have a memory of a woman like washing her hair with jiz and stuff, like we're off the come on, I don't know, we don't have to do it. I just had to close that gap in order to make room for new cool ship. Yeah okay, ye yep. But now you got me interested in this cum thing. I know, I know, but I think it's like because it's protein. Come is protein?
Are you asking or no? I'm telling you. I'm telling you come as a protein. Hey, Pamela, Yeah, Ma, how proud of your son? Are you right now? Everybody quiet. I don't hear this a lot. I'd like my mom to have the floor. Hey, shut up, Pamela. You can scream out and affrom I see her, I see her right there. Yeah. Mo.
Now her voice is a little bit lost, so hey, sh shut the fuck up real quick.
Shut the fuck. Adam has a question.
Hey, if you could scream out one affirmation for Kyle right now, because he's talking about a lot of jizz. Thank you for standing up. Grandma, you had the floor, you had you gotta say something nice about me.
Dude, your mom started to read your eulogitis hand right now. I don't think that my mom should be drinking that. That was such a sit back down. Yeah, your your your four love her pieces. But I mean she had to be like well to be fair. I think her voice smart. Yeah, No, she did the most love you, she did the most mom thing. She's like. Well, when he was three, I knew he was musical, like, ah, ship, here we go. Yeah that's my mom.
Everybody, My mom used to fart in Yeah, tell more stories about your mom my mom my mom is uh did not hold back in a in a in a house of voice.
She farted. She farted all the time. Yeah, like my friends would try it. They would. My mom and my dad would both fart in their sleep tremendously. Oh well, sleep parts are different.
But in the middle of the living room when you're watching Philadelphia, yeah, nineteen.
So there was no holding back.
I actually believe that because farts were so open in my household that it is now my love language.
Goodbye. I've noticed that on this tour.
It's been a while since we've been in very close contact with each other, and you just let them slot on out.
I'm telling you, dude, this happens in like jobs that I go out. If I fart in front of you, I truly respect him.
And I believe that because and you say you haven't worked with Spielberg or anyone. No, no, not yet. I'm still waiting.
Yeah, And I can tell it's your love language because it's impossible for you to fart and not stare at the person in your mouth you're farting it.
That is true. Kyle will just be like this like his His part is the home improvement noise, Tim Allen that I feel like I've had a fart like that.
Absolutely well, I will say that because I grew up with you, Kyle. I grew up in a New Czech household. We used to eat aggle waffles together.
Dude. It weirdly always smelled like eggs in that household. I know, yeah, but it did smell like rotten eggs.
It just was.
But I do recall both you and your mother parting. Hey, she's not dead, dude, I'm just I'm stay.
I'm gonna say my mom, and do you remember your guys? But farts sounding identical?
Yes? Yes?
Leads me to believe and maybe we could prove it tonight, Oh detective, that you have twin butthole?
And how and okay now, and how might we prove this? Is this another CSI Room Raiders type thing? Is it's two different snowflakes? Is looking the exact Hey, you know the odds of that lake nos like one in a billion.
Billion. I believe, I bet we do have a similar butthole.
Wait are you saying that snowflakes and buttholes are I'm not going to show they're like fingerprints.
It's like that's mine for me, for me, print my mom what what? But buttholes of the are the fingerprint of the backside. Buttholes are the fingerprint of the backside. Is one of the coolest things you've ever said, because this kind of always you want to get.
I'll give some points for that, yes, okay, so thank you, and you know what, so we've been uh Todd are are one of our producers and he mixes everything and edits everything for us on the podcast. Uh he yeah, he went back and tallied up all of the points, which is incredible and is winning by.
A lot we don't talk about. So I know, oh sorry, the one that shall not be made, the one that shall not be, one that shall not be that's why we each get for being here. Yea yeah, yea yeah, yea yea yea yeah, yea ye yes, yes, okay, but I.
Want to get back to the buttholes much like you want to get back to the coump Okay. So I was always tripping because I'm like, you know, eventually we run out of phone numbers, right, Like we're just going to run out of numbers. Somebody's gonna have the same phone number eventually, right.
What do you mean explain this is what I'm saying. No, I want to I want to all unpack this. This might be a really long walk. Okay, let's do it.
You know how you take your your fingerprint, like your thumb print is on your birth certificated or they take your foot, so eventually people are going to start to have the same fingerprints.
That's not how fingerprints work. But all you hit you are so dumb. You are so dumb. I'm a dumb ass. Yeah, all right, that works. Well.
What I was trying to get to, even though I don't know how fingerprints work, what if we start identifying ourselves at the d m BE I would go in in the bathroom and kind of you dab ink on your butthole.
Dude, so you're spreading it, you're spreading it, and then you're sitting down on something like such. Yeah, dude, imagine how you salty.
Imagine how salty the woman working at the DMV would be to then have to also deal with all these butthole photos.
Yeah.
Well, and I'm also going to say right now, I don't think my actual butthole is touching the ground at the moment, Like that's that's tough to do well.
There's only one way to find out.
Uhays, Isaac, come out here in paint Kyle's butthole painted.
Yellow, painted yellow.
I'll sit on the ground like baby nude. But Isaac is there like a towel. I'm sweating, I'm very hot, I'm kissed.
Now I'm running. I don't know. A lot hot hot, hot, hot hot hot. Yeah, maybe it's maybe it's hot in Oakland hot hot. Did your mom fart a lot? Blake? What's going on with your gay? My mom's here too. Bring the lights of mom standing there is worry.
Please Grandma, please scream something, one affirmation for Blake, one nice thing. Let's bring the houselights back up. Please go ahead and stand up. We'll scream one nice thing about him.
She said, you're my firstborn. That's not nice.
Mom.
Oh wait, she's holding her hair. The hair. It's the hair, the hair. I think you interrupted her. Wait, but she said, she said she likes your hair, but your hair is like her hair. So she kind of complimented herself. I think she said, out of all my children, I like you the best. No, don't.
My brother's here, ay j I know, but obviously obviously bring.
The lights up. Let me see, let's see where they are. He's in the aisle. Dude, that is the fucking young go hard. You're not coming up here. What do you say, dude.
All I'm saying is that's what I thought I heard a J. I'm not trying to fight, dude, I'm not trying to find you. Do not take your shirt off and flex for this audience right now?
Yeah, do not take your shirt off and flex for the audience.
Flex for this audience. AJ, take your shirt off and flex for the audience. Yeah, flex for the audience. Take it off AJA, Oh my god, off, take it off later later. Oh that's so fire.
Yeah.
I haven't seen fucking AJ in a long time. Man.
Ud as looking good, Isaac. This is a nice rowdy show. Tonight would be the night to show your nipple.
Let's see us. This is what it is. Tonight would be the Knights. Tonight is the night to show your nipples. It falls post, Isaac. I know how at home. We're at home.
It's the whole.
I think you can here. Don't toy with us.
Yes, yes, that tell people to the body water respec.
Yes, what it is? You have no idea? What a big deal. That was Guys.
This is our twentieth show of the podcast of the live show, and Isaac we've been asking him from day one. I'm like, let me see those translucent nips, because you can see if you look up close, if you hold.
Your eye to it, you can see his heart beat and ship he's a human you see the longshore.
Like, Yeah, Isaac's body is like the same color as when they find e t by the river dying.
Yep. Like it's just like it's like et if et was inside out.
Boy, It's like it's like one of that weird exhibit like the human body where you can just like see through it.
His head also a walking, a walking talking mri.
Isaacenty shows from the guts to do that.
And we so so proud, dude, Yeah, I so proud. I love that we immediately start to just ship on him. Dude.
Hey, but by the way I did, that's not shitting. I think that's fucking cool. I wish my body wasn't so thick and dense with muscles that you could.
See, right, you know what I mean, Isaac? It sucks out.
I had this addiction to being shredded and rich and fucking bulking huge.
But I do im the exact same as AJ And that's.
That's that conquered meat back there. Yeah, and conquered is known for their meat. Well actually he actually, actually we did have. I used to work any Fritz's Meets a butcher shop, but our competition was none other than Kinders Meets Ye heard it? And Who's who? People have heard of that one? And who won? Who is Fritz is still around?
It's out of businesses Kinders one, Kinders Kinders one, And I'm proud of kind rightfully, so Kinders fucking rock. Hey, you know what I'm from, Omaha. I feel like we're more known for our stakes than conquered. Hey, you know what, he is not here, kiss my fucking ass. I will fight each and every one of you almost so I fucking die.
That's actually tight. We here in the Bay. We respect that kind of hometown pride.
But yeah, you know what I'm gonna I'm gonna say something. First off, I want to give Isaac.
Yes, a lot of points, a lot of points. That's big, that's big time.
But I will say since Dursey's dumbassaying here, yep, the bitch, Oh, the bitch, and Adam is a motherfucking rock star coming out to Oakland.
Like an exeinster. Yeah.
Sure, I would love to make Adam an honorary bay Deestrian two nights.
Oh thank you? Oh okay, look we got him. You know what is there? A wait? Wait or what? I'm good? Whoa? Whoa? I was about to go into like a whole bit of like what's the ceremony? How can we do this? Oh?
Dude?
That I just I love doing ship like that. Adam is obsessed with being like the heel a w w E bad guy. Yeah, which is cool, that's fucking sick. Yeah, you would for sure be like if Adam was in the w w'd be Hollywood Hall Cocain.
Well, dude, Hollywood Haul Cocin is my favorite fucking wrestler.
Me too.
I think he would be more like when Mankind first came out and he's like super evil in the corner, Like.
A wait, that's that's what you think.
I'd be like, Yeah, dude, what about my personality makes you be like I'd be.
Like, yeah, I don't know that Adam would play the psycho in the corner. I feel like he's he's the American fucking heel.
That's why he has to go against type. Dude.
Oh okay, okay, he's gonna be like sort of like golf and you're actually you used to be kind of golf, right, That is not true at all.
I was never got Blake's Blake's on you good. I'm fizzing, bro.
That's not to ship on your opera. I would I would love to be an honorary member of the band.
Okay, okay, him back, all right? Will you allow me back in? I know I he's goofing mix mix mixed bag, but yeah, you gotta be careful with that, dude. I'm fine either way. No, I think you're in. I think you're in. All right, good, we respect that.
We I mean, I love coming. I used to come up with you guys, and I would spend Thanksgiving at.
Your house for like six years in a row. I came.
It was like a handful of years, and every year some shit would go down and we would fistfight one another.
Yea, and the ship that went down it all started at the fucking Clayton Club.
So I don't know if if we got Clayton Club people out here.
It's deep East, it's East Deep and I remember, I remember we got in a fistfight, and then me and Kyle as we used to do, and then and then I like wasn't allowed to sleep at your house or maybe I just didn't want to, and so I slept that Blake's house and Blake's like, you have to sleep in my brother A J's room. But AJ was like a middle school kid, so it's just like this like six or seventh grader being like.
Uh, I guess it's okay. Let you sleep in my room, dude.
We I don't think we've gotten into like why we fought that night, but the guy that caused into it is here tonight, my friend Justin. Yeah, we were so fucking wasted. And my friend, our friend Justin Krame is, who's in the building right now?
What's up, Jay? What's up?
Jay?
He's somewhere around here, somewhere, but he was puking or no, he was pissing, and you were puking next to him. And I was so mad that you were by the way next to him was fifteen feet away, but for.
Whatever reason, I had created this space in my brain that you were too close. And right before we went to blows it was like, you're fucking puking right next to her, my friend is pissing. You're too close and you're puking next to my friend who's pissing. It's not your fucking you.
And then we fought. I You're like, you're you're looking next for my friend, and then I'm like, i'm your friend, and I'm like, but so is he. And he's pissing and pissing, puke. That's too close together, pissing, Trump's puking. Give him space.
And I'm like, hey, pissing, Trump's puking. That's fighting words in my mouth first?
Did I swing first? Or I guess I can't remember. I'm sure I can't remember. Sorry about that. I love you, dude, Yeah, I love you too, man. I I mean that's just that's just like growing up, you know what I mean. He's a there's that good old fucking Bay Area meat right here. He found it.
Damn, that is a that is a lean shanky, some good good not a lot of meat there.
Damn, you got a kinders counter in your I just felt it, Blake. Hey, he no, he doesn't. He pickleball that thing right off. Yeah, Well there's still barbecue sauce that comes out. Hey, hey, okay, that was fucking bad. It's bad.
I'd like to just switch gears real quick. My dad turned sixty nine last week.
That's best birthday, the greatest birthday. He's over here, he's over here. Let's turn the house lights up and have Papa Noots stand out sixty nine.
The greatest bird he's wearing. He's all fitted out nine sixty nine. Man, Good job, Dad.
So that was such, that was like, that was such a six sixty nine year old dance.
I feel like that was like watching my grandpa. Dude.
That was the That was the like Dougie of his time. I don't what's so cool as I'm so old now, I don't know a newer dance. I'm like, what's a new current dance?
The dougie? What is no? He doing a fucking glow stick? Dan? I think your dad is out there raving secret. He could be he could be the guy. The guy said LSD is his favorite drug of all time.
My dad told me one time he goes, well, the only drug I haven't tried is heroin.
And I'm like.
The only drug because there's a lot of drugs out there and you've tried them all except for Heroin.
And he's like, yep, fucking double down on it.
I'm like, fuck's there, he is, there, he is, there's Dennis beautiful.
What do you guys think you'll do to celebrate your sixty nine? Well, I'll tell you one thing. I hope I'm doing fucking sixty nine, dude, I thought for sure.
No, dude, when you're sixty nine, if you try to sixty nine smothered, you're you're dying.
No.
No, that's like but kind of a cool way to go. That's like the most golden of birthdays.
Sure, sixty when you turn sixty nine, that is the that is that's I get the cool of achievement.
I agree, it would be magical and I don't know it. Hey, hold on, I don't want to know if you guys did it. We're not we're not asking keep that to yourself, your grandma. We are not asking. No, you know what I'm asking. Hope. Remember, don't ask my dad. Just do that dance again. You're gonna spend the whole entire day. Well, I said one thing that I would do is sixty nine.
Actually, yeah, I think that is what I'm saying I wasn't saying that at first, but now it's become like a challenge. Yeah, because you say I get smothered if I'm sixty nine, But I hope I'm in enough shape to where I can sixty nine all fucking day.
I think you could. Yeah, I like it if you make it like I'm just saying.
I wasn't saying like you had to be smothered and you you're definitely gonna die. I'm saying if you do die at sixty nine and your sixty ninth birthday being smothered in a sixty nine, that's a legendary funeral.
That is legendary. Very shaga, Dad is legendary.
Like your funeral is attended by the Pope, king's, Queen's everyone from all over the lands.
Maybe even Steven spielbergl Cup.
Yeah, he'll finally will come. Oh come, do not come.
He's definitely gonna be dead by then, though, right Oh yeah, oh yeah, yeah. It was like nine is thirty years from now.
Fucking shit, bro Wait no twenty wait wait thirty ninety nine, fifty nine six, it's thirty, it's thirty.
Hey, it shout out to Clayton Valley High School. Yeah, we do. There is Clayton Valley people in the house. Yeah, I don't know. Some ugly eagles in the building.
I feel like, if being sixty nine is that far away, I'll probably go somewhere tropical, like fucking Antarctica at that point.
Oh ship, why why is that global warming? Blake's BK's taking us down the path. We'll get PolyChar Wait, so the only place that was a little bit of a walk. I don't know if it's a direct points, but my stepdad called for it. So oh well, okay, good job Andy. Well should he stand up? What do you want to Andy? Where you at?
Dog?
I see him right there. Let's turn him up. Let's give him house light. Let's give him up. Let's see him. Let's let's get the house lights up. Where the house lights at there? Go? Come on, now, we're sleeping on the job.
You might it's Andy from my Instagram story Instagram post ago where he was smoking a lot of weed in Santos and.
He's puffing.
I bet the house lights guy who's back there? He's like, what the fuck is happening?
Yeah, he was just about to take a ship and He's like.
God, bitch, can't breaking buzzballs on everything?
Oh yeah, that one fucking popped up.
I know, dude, that was our first pop and it makes me go like, I'm a bitch. I can't throw a buzzball all the way up there?
Yeah?
How does that feel to not be able to? I mean I got it up there on my second one. I got it up there on the first one. I for sure I felt like a bitch. Yeah, yeah, bitch made like the one who shall not be named.
Yeah.
Yeah, you guys are certainly getting horny right now. You guys are talking a lot of horny.
Stoves sixty ninth birthdays. Well, you guys are sort of nasty dudes. If I nasty fucking dudes, Yeah, we kind of are. I guess a little nasty dude.
You know.
You guys. That reminds me of a little song. Yeah, were since we're you know, kind of in our hometown. We're from Conquered, Conquered forty minutes away. Well thirty five, I said, thirty five, it's okay to round up. There's quice a traffic. I'm buffering it. I know, the real time traffic barker.
It kind of feels like we should probably do a sort of a special performance.
Okay, like what should we do? You want to stand up or what do you want?
I don't know, Tod, I was wondering if maybe we could get a little nasty.
If you catch it. I'm kind of a nasty dude. I like it when a girl sucks all my tits.
I'm kind of a nasty dude. I like it when a girl sucks on my tits. I'm kind of a nasty dude. I like it when a girl sucks on my tits. I'm kind of a nasty dude. I like it when a girl sucks on my tipsy.
I'm kind of a nasty dude. I like it when a girl sucks some my tits. I'm kind of a nasty dude. I like it when a girl sucks some my tits. My tits, my my tits, tits.
Look.
I'm kind of a nasty dude. I like it when a girl sleeps on my tits. I'm kind of a nasty dude. I like it when i girl sucks on my tits.
Oh, oh titties, Oh titties, oh titties.
I'm kind of a nasty dude. I like it when a girl SUPs on my tips. I'm kind of a nasty dude. I like it when a girl SUPs on my tips. I'm kind of a nasty dude. I like you when a girl suck so my tits, I'd kind of a nasty is having.
Oh ohtaes, oh titties.
Here's the deal.
I'm kind of a nasty dude. Like I really liked it when that girl suck my tits. Hits, yo, Honestly, that was.
Fucking cool. Like from back there, she's like, yeah, I'll do it. In the closer she got, she's like, his nipples are so hairy.
Up he's actually sweating a lot, very harry nipples. Yeah, sorry about that.
Yeah, that's all right. It's just a little supper now that song. No, I do have a question, like, what's up? I did not know you had the song prepared. I feel I feel like I'm the a little bit the outsider. I'm not the berrier boy. You guys playing this whole fucking thing, don't even let me in on. I'd show my tits. I mean I showed my dick and asshole. I did it in a movie.
I would have all I'm saying is I would have loved to.
Be a part of that, but well we can. We can maybe come out with a with a new version of that track. Maybe we can bring you on that version. I mean now that song is incredibly complex.
Yeah, the lyricism, the lyricism is is I remember we incredible.
We just all lived together and every once in a while I would come home from work and these guys would be like, you have to listen to this track.
Oh yeah, oh yeah.
And I remember when you showed me that track and you had already cut the music video to it.
We did hell the quick. We were like all on photo booth on a mac.
That's true, yep, yeah yeah, and it's just you guys. It's exactly what you just saw, but with like funny backgrounds. You guys are like on roller coasters.
And ship Yeah, and we got we had tank tops on the tank tops, had funny things on the tank top.
I think it was one of those nights where we were just smoking a lot of resin which, by the way, we do not have to do that anymore, and I I kinda miss it's dude, we used to scrape resin balls so fucking hard man, dude, I'm telling you, Yeah, I think I'm the one that showed you how to do it.
You did, and then Blake like perfected it, and he would collect these balls that were like that big and he would just break it off and fucking throw it in the pipe and smoke it.
Yeah, because my whole thing would be like you guys would be like smoking weed and you'd be like you want to hit and I'd be like, nah, I'm cool. And then you guys would go to work. I'd still be at home and I'd be like, time to boil the pipes. They'll never know if their stash is missing if I'm literally drinking the butthole juice of their weed.
But that shit kind of fucks with a Resin high is way different. Oh yeah, oh yeah, uh, it infinitely works. Yeah, it's like.
It's the it's the like I mean, you're so unbelievably high.
It's like the crack rock. Yeah, it's like, is that is it Resin? I feel like this audience would understand it's I mean, we drove through the city a little bit.
Yeah, is it like early dab? Is that is that dab?
Oh?
Yeah, maybe that's the beginning of dabs. People were like, I like this high, but it could be much cleaner.
Yeah, right, I don't.
I feel like I don't need to get a headache five seconds after I smoke it.
Dude, I can't even do dabs.
I'm so immediately I'm already hanging on by a thread with my intelligence, right if I do dabs. I remember I was in like Wisconsin in a meat freezer with these college kids. It was like four am, and they're like we I it was like my dad runs a delicate tests and we can drink there. And so we're drinking in this delicate tests and they're like, let's smoke.
Dabs in the meat freezer.
And I'm like a famous comedian at this point, So like they're stoked to hang out with and I do uh with dabs, And I go, isn't it weird that marmalade and marinate are the same thing? And I remember my buddy Walsh and Adam Ray were there with me and they both go, no, it's not. And these college kids are like, I just want to know. Those college kids are like, you are so dumb. Adam always wants you were so dumb. Yeah, And I never felt dumber in my life, and I was like, I can't, I can't do it. I'll stick with my regular weed. I feel like I'm a grandpa with my weed smoking right now because I just smoke joints.
Yeah. Yeah, No, that's the way to go. Joint Yeah, joints me too. I'm there too, joint the rock, I think. By the way, Oakland, I love you guys, California in general.
I love because every California show that we've done so are We've just been given duffle bags of weed.
Dude, so much fucking weed tonight.
So much fucking weed we got and I'm not kidding. Three duffle bags full of weed. Yes, yes, yep.
The logistics of getting it all on a plane don't matter. It does not matter.
We're going to San Diego. I'll be like trying to stop me. Tsa fucking agent, bro. We should just and then I go, did you check my butthole photo?
I'm good to go. It's me Yeah.
Yeah, that's gonna be the new TSA Clear is your butthole photo?
Yo, that's so funny.
He's clear plus because they make you get say, when you put your eyes up there, they're like get a little bit closer, get a little bit farther away.
If you're spreading your cheeks and you're just like, am I is it? Uh? Is it good? Is it cool?
That's that's the exact post I do when I wipe my ass. You guys ask how I do it? Is that really how you do it?
Yes, you're going like this, Well no, not like that. I reach around a lot. Yeah, yeah, you go back, you go front to back. You don't go front, Well no, but I can barely reach that. What are you doing, Kyle? You're doing like fucking yoga over here. You don't got to go.
I'm doing what he's saying. Well, sure, I'm not saying you have to go like, well, you said the exact post, so I don't know when you're here's.
The post, here's the post, Okay, look it up, all right, and then you go because there's the cheeks are spread.
So it's like, yeah, yeah, that's chill. I have never tried it. I've never tried it, dude.
We were shooting Game Overman and uh yeah, it's a good movie shooting Game over Man, and we were doing a scene that ended up getting cut that was gonna be the end of the movie, and then we changed it because they're.
Like, wiping his ass is the end of the movie. Yeah, maybe not.
And then I uh, They're like, and then wipe your ass. I'm like okay, and then I wipe my ass. I wipe my ass and everyone, the whole crew goes, what the fuck are you doing? Why are you doing that? I'm like, well, i'mpe in my ass. And then I remember, like one crew guy was like, yeah, that's how you wipe an ass.
Yeah.
I remember after all that, it was cool because we were like, fine, okay, you wipe your ass standing up, and when you stood up, there was your dick again, right in the shot. And so the real ending of the movie was not just you wiping your ass, it was your dick standing right.
And then that was.
Liked, dick, thanks dude, good looking out, good looking out.
Yeah.
That was like the only note that fucking uh Netflix gave us was you gotta change that ending?
That was it.
The dick is too big? What the isaac? Can I get a fucking beer out here? God damn it, buddy, Yeah, that thing I lost. This little dickhead there he is, I seen your titty? Are your kidy? Dude? Isaac is a changed mail. Isaac comeing to everybody. Yeah, I get in here, so cool? We got the Isaac TI. No, we fucking love this man. We love him.
Isaac signed us when we were all like twenty two, twenty three years old.
You're really touching my thigh there, you guys. He signed I got in when we got Workaholics. He wanted nothing to do with me. Thank you for Workaholics.
It's true, and that's how we started. But it's okay, We're past that and I love you, Adam. Continue. We love this male.
So we love him so much.
And what the cool thing about doing the podcast is we've said so many stories about Isaac that now when he comes out, people lose their minds and it's so cool to see.
Yeah, because he does not yeah yep. And my favorite part about it is he does not like it.
No, absolutely hates the attention, could not dislike it more, hates being here and that brings me so much joy.
Dude, I don't like you guys. Tell me to show my texts. Go ahead, everybody horn everybody yo that is looking on Isaac, take a bow, take a bow. I think hey, I think was it wlate were you born here, bro, Isaac was born in San Francisco, so give it up. Yeah, that's fucking huge. I like him. That's fucking huge, Bro, that's cool. Tell the people that Isaac Horn is back. That's cool, dude. Oh yeah, wait? Does does the Paramount Theater have anything to do with Paramount Gluss? No?
No, no, you cannot get those wires crossed tonight. This is one of the coolest fucking theaters we've been in on this tour. It's gorgeous, a fucking gorgeous theater.
It has nothing to do with that dumb ass app Yeah, where's he going? What is Adam doing? I don't know, but now it's us. Should we do like nasty dude again or something?
I don't know, dude, something's come over me. I haven't been able to walk hardly for like a year and a half, and suddenly I come to the Bay and I can fucking runs that bay water.
Baby mud, that dirty baywater trash. Some got in me. So we were given this shirt by I believe his name is Sid or her name is Sid? Is this Sid right here? No? Are you just a guy?
So we were giving this shirt and I'm not gonna say what it says. But you want to chant a word, go ahead, and if you all want to do it at one to three.
Again, ye know what I mean? Yeah, unless and we have to quantify this, unless they want to hire us. Yeah, unless we're hired for everything, in which case we would love to go back. Yes, yeah, or if they actually we're kind of counting on that money this year.
So it's kind of really fucked up, but really fucked up. That is why we're on tour currently, why we are on tour. We thank you guys for coming out. We would have absolutely loved to give you the movie. We were so excited about it. The script was great. The one that shall not be named did a great job writing the script.
Yes he did most of it, but give it up for him because he did write a hell of a scripts and we are super.
Proud of it and him. Fuck it. What's up, Kyle? You fucking bored? What's going on? No?
No, Dur's just texted Actually he put it said honestly right when you said that, he's texted him broken heart.
Oh he's sad.
Why because someone for sure texted him going like, dude, you're a fucking bitch.
Why aren't you here? No, no, no, they probably said some really sad shit. Oh sure, I think we might be finally.
Guess this was my make a wish to see the four of you together.
Yeah, and uh, I'm dying in three two one. No, this is good. He's showing emotion. This is good.
That actually is crazy. Last night we put a spotlight on him since he's never said. We've all like, we've been best friends for twenty years, you know, and these guys even longer. Yeah, and so you know, when you grown up with each other, and then we've had like this crazy wild ride with each other with workholics in the movies, and you know, since we're now the podcast, it's it's been pretty crazy.
Yeah, yeah, very great. We mean, so we mean so.
Much to each other, and we love each other like brothers. And we've all said like at some point like I fucking love you due yeah.
Yeah times, I love you guys.
Sometimes I love you very I love you very much, and I also love you very much. I love you as well, maybe fifty times. And he's he's always like and also with you and I also, you guys are really cool dudes that I work.
With and we're like, all right, well, yeah, yeah, those are the sickest work friends ever ever did.
Couldn't imagine better work friends. And last time we put a spotlight on his ass and made him say really nice things.
Yeah, and he slipped at the very end, he was like, I love you, dude. Yeah he did. He did to each one of us. It was it was really quiet, but he did it on.
Now I'm starting to realize he's the type of guy who will say I love you and then he thinks he can do like fifty mean things in a row.
Now, now what I told you, I love you, big fucking deal. So I borrowed your car. Wait, that's a mean thing, borrowing a car. I thought you're gonna say I didn't show up.
Yeah, I thought, yeah, you're gonna go right, he faked a family emergency.
That's probably the logical thing I should have said.
But yeah, because dude, if you want to borrow my car, you're more than welcome to borrow it.
Yeah.
To me, that is the greatest slight.
Fuck you for asking me to borrow my car and me saying yes, yeah, you know what, Fuck you, And for an afternoon.
For a whole afternoon, my ass after I said yes and gave you the keys. I'm gonna be on you.
I'm gonna be honest, man, we're hitting that that minute where the buzzball finally goes to the next level.
Is that how buzzballs work? They start down here, they just go.
Well, because you know, you never see buzzball in like a nice part of town. No, No, You're never like in Beverly Hills and there's a buzz ball on the street. It's always like like, actually, my wife, we live in a you know, we live in a nice neighborhood, and she saw a buzzball on the sidewalk and it was not me, and she goes, we have to move.
Let's go.
There goes the neighborhood goes to neighborhood. Dude, do you want to do some hot hot stories or what are you thinking?
Yeah, let's do it. Let's do some hot hot topics. Guy, let's do it. Let's do it. Let's let's get into it. Let's get into the thank god hot topics. Yes.
So, Carnival Cruise Lines gives a woman a lifetime cruise band for packing CBD gummies.
Dude, Okay, a lifetime cruise band. Yeah, I know.
Also, by the way, I've been on a Carnival cruise line. I went I don't know if it was Carnival, but I went on a cruise line. I hosted the Weezer cruise one year, which was yeah, it was super fun, but it was like a really bad idea because they gave me a microphone and then they go, yeah, you could talk whenever you want, and I'm like all right, And then I go and I'm like having fun and I'm maybe drinking a little too much and I go to the casino and then immediately I lost like five hundred dollars. And so I went from like, come on down to the casino to like, don't come to the casino. Yeah, yeah, they take all your fucking money down here at the casino. And I'm talking like the four thousand people that are on the cruise ship, like you could hear it if you're in your room brushing your teeth ready to.
Go to bed.
Me going like, don't come to the casino, stupid asses, man, Now do you even play crabs? Fucking rigged? And they immediately came down They're like, can we see your microphone? I thought it was chunking, and they were like, and uh, you're good with the microphone. And also, by the way, so many people offered me cocaine on the cruise shop on the cruise ship, like there and they go they snuck it in their Altoid's pack. So the fact that they a lifetime band for sad gummies you wild incarnival.
Yeah, that's fucked up. Yeah, I consider that. I consider that to be fucked up.
Yeah, what the hell are you supposed to do on a cruise ship besides get like completely blitzed out of your mind?
Well, I think you can alay like CVD, you're not even getting blitzed dude.
Yeah, that's super like taking a nice bubble bath. Yeah, you're just trying to let your joints relax a little bit. Yeah. Yeah, I feel like CBD is the equivalent of like a scented candle. Dude.
You should see my CBD game at home. Really, I two like fifty gummies A nine. I got balmed a rub on my joints. Hell yeah, okay, hey doesn't work.
I don't like it. Snake oil Yeah, let me waiting. Yeah okay, yes, I promise I am doing that. Have you guys, by the way, have you guys. Ever been on a cruise?
Oh fuck yeah, I have fuckingness I have. I've been on a cruise and with the one that I went on had unlimited pizza. Whoa, oh, twenty four hours unlimited pizza.
Oh I think it was twenty four hours. It was fucking awesome.
And were you a child when this blew your fucking mind?
Or it was pizza? I was about fifteen years old.
Yeah, so fifteen at the age when you were just like fuck, I mean, I can't party, I'm with my parents. I'm on a cruise ship. Yes, yeah, so my whole deal is to see if I can make them run out of pizza.
Yeah, well, just go get another pizza.
Dude.
Here's a quick question. If we did a cruise, Hang on, if we did a cruise, would you guys show up to that ship? Yeah, that's good enough, dude. Call it the water trash Cruise. That'd be the best. Whoa, the water trash Cruise. That would be so fun, you know what, because you could do it.
There's like, I mean, I think they're between two thousand and four thousand cabins.
Sick.
Let's fucking bang that shit out for a week. I think the I think these fucking cruises got p go ball courts on him. Now.
Oh, I feel like if I get on, I just want somebody to fucking knock me down.
Try. I'm like goro, yeah, and that makes me rethink my pitch. Why you don't want me to? Okay, fucking dude, that's blowing my ear drums out. It blows you fucking back. Baby. This is durorspighting us for talking so much shit earlier. He unleashed the ghost in here. So Red Lobster just lost a lot of money. Oh this is great.
On They've lost so much fucking money, twenty million dollars on endless shrimp.
Kiss now, dude.
They said, hey, we're doing endless shrimp, and then so many fucking awesome dope dudes were like, oh endless you say that's I'd like to put that to the fucking test. And my local Red Lobster and then they just show up and house twenty million dollar loss. Dude, that's incredible, holy shit balls. Ye, admittedly, and I like Red Lobster and their shrimp is all right, you know, I fuck up their shrimp, but it's the cheesy bread you go for.
Yeah.
Oh, dude, cheesy bread.
Fucking yeah, now this was they just lost sixty million dollars because the TII Nation showed up and ate them out of cheesy bread. Yes, that's what I really want to hear in the in the news.
Yeah, what are you saying, Cheddar biscuits? Biscuits, That's what it is.
Chander biscuits, of course, Yeah, of cotuits or just jello at the at the at the salad bar. Imagine eating twenty million dollars worth of jello at the.
Salad Dude, that's a fucking of jello because jello is pretty cheap.
If I e jello as fuck, but I'm a like, it just turns into liquid in your mouth.
So wait, so you could basically drink jello? Well do they even serve jello at Red Lobster? Oh?
Maybe I'm thinking of Sizzler. Yeah, that is a superior establishment.
Sizzler.
They are the Hey, dude, I take back that I love you from earlier, because fuck you, dude, you.
Want if you're going to Red Lobster over Sizzler.
Wait, as far as a good meal goes, yeah, dude, Oh I guess, yeah, I guess.
I mean as far I mean Sisler holds a great place in my heart.
Like anytime you put the little like leaf on the steak, I'm like, it was fancy.
Yeah, that's that's called parsley. By the way, is it yeah? Is it okay to eat the garnish the parsley? Do you remember? I remember, yeah, asking if I could eat the garnish.
I remember being in like I was like six or seven, and my parents they would allow you, like, you know, we didn't have a ton of money when I was growing up, and they were like, we can go out to eat on your birthday and you get to pick the restaurant. But I don't know fucking restaurants. Dude, I'm seven, and they're not telling me restaurants. Yeah, don't take a list of nice restaurants.
Are just saying you get a pick.
And they're like, fucking don't picked Chuck e Cheeses.
God damn, that's the only one he knows.
Or McDonald's would be fine, but Chucky jeesus, fuck no. And then I saw a Sizzler commercial and it looked so goddamn fancy.
I was like, so I go upstairs and I remember like being a little nervous and being like mama. I was like Mama, and she's like, when did you become a British little boy? You? Because I was trying to be fancy.
I'm like, Mama that, yeah, can we please eat at this fine dining in an establishment I saw in the television set and she's like, what is it? And I go Sizzler and my mom the look of enjoyment. She was like oh, and she was like, yeah, I think we could swing that. And I remember thinking, I'm taking them.
For all their works. Oh yeah, got him with the broke cass. I'm about to eat my weight and shrink. Oh yeah, of course, and I will do that immediately.
Noise, dude, zombie deer disease confirmed?
What?
Yeah?
Yes, I like.
I like how one woman was like, no, get the fuck out of here with zombie dear disease.
Zombie means that you come to life after your dead. Yeah, so this is talking about reanimated deer.
Hey, shut up, you bitch, I'm about to read it. I just want to know read it. Hey, dude. By the way, it's kind of more fun with outdoors, right. Yeah, I've had a much better time. Sorry, dirty, You're rough the project. Goodbye.
Zombie deer disease confirmed at Yellowstone. Hey, I know officials worn to avoid wildlife. Yellowstone National Park officials are warning travelers to steer clear of wildlife after a zombie deer is found dead near Yellowstone Lake, a hotspot inside the heavily visited national park.
Huh okay.
The deceased adult mule deer suffered from chronic wasting disease or c w D, a contagious and fatal sickness that affects deer reindeer.
Are those even real? The cause of deer reindeer? Bigfoot squad, a cobra, dude, I did not know that.
And ghosts, Well, this makes me not believe there's a whole thing. They just snuck in reindeer, Like, I'm not going to catch that ship.
Santa Claus could not be reached for comments. By the way, it's for sure real, and we would all fucking eat ship on. Are you smarter than a fifth grader? A fifth grader'd be like, wait the real Adam, I was just don't fly, you fucking idiot. Yeah, I was playing along. But reindeer is a very real animal. Yeah you know that for a fact. Yes, I've eaten reindeer in Alaska.
Okay, yeah, well then great, yeah dude, and I also knew that.
Yeah, me too. Or I'm a dumb ass and I just had a hot dog in Alaska. It just said redeer till this California bitch's reindeer. You were eating a North restaurant. They don't know, they don't know. Yeah, they all fears on. They're like, yeah, it's reindeer.
I don't know, dude, fucking ballpark, frank dog, I don't know, man.
Uh, reindeer, elk and moose, causing zombie like symptoms including excessive drooling, okay, pile drooping, ears me, head trimmers, blake, teeth, grinding me, and reluctance to move. There is currently no vaccine or non treatment for the disease.
WHOA can't spread to humans? Can it spread the human? Wiser's cooking up some ship. Yeah, like the next grade pan. Baby here it comes there.
All of a sudden, we just hear like reindeer loose in major cities work. Did a reindeer get out here?
Dude, hurry, it's jumping out of a Pfizer pan.
They just spray paint fucking deer green and they're like, look out, it's zombie deer.
Get a poke, you gotta get.
I stand by the vaccine. I stand by the vaccine. I've got in on the boosters. Sorry, can I get some hot cues and hot Oh?
Hell yeah? Does it say it doesn't It doesn't say that if it can go to humans.
Right.
It can't transfer to humans, not yet. It does not say that thing. Okay, good, they appreciate that. Isaac Horn everybody, oh from San Francisco. Yeah it is. It does not say if it can transfer, but you know for sure in twenty twenty four, Oh shit, what was that? Okay, we're not gonna do it now. Yeah, there's no way. We'll look like that later.
Bro.
He just threw a brick at me and was like, make this movie. No, all right, we'll check it out later. All right, No, I will read it. I will read it. I will read it. What if that's uh huh, what if that's my next wife? What if that was Steven Spielberg and it just fucked it all up?
Could be that's how my mom thought how worked. When I first moved to Hollywood. She was just like, just introduce yourself. Just go to the studio, say, hi, I'm new.
Well that is how Spielberg got in. He like snuck onto the fucking lot and took took an office.
Hey, well, good work, homie. Yeah, by the way, onto the paramount lot. By the way, we couldn't even get our movie made.
So yeah, right, we're yeah, we're actually having a lot of cheuble.
We're not those guys, pal.
Yeah, the green lights, the green lights just aren't coming as quick as they.
So you guys had some hot cues and we got some sweet sweet as.
Bill Vee goes blank with an exclamation point, would you rather make the Workholics movie? Or oh shit, there's a heavy hitter, bring the A's and Raiders and Raiders.
Back to Oakland? Oh my god? Whoa the Workaholics movie? Or or the A's and the Raiders?
Well, well see, and I know Blake's a pandering n asshole, so I have a I have a feeling what he's gonna choose.
Well, it's it's all hypothetical, remember, bro, Yeah, you don't hold this power, Blake.
Yeah no, but your your family would have food to eat for another year if you chose the Workaholics movie, If you choose the Raiders or the A's.
You'll watch a team absolutely suck. Cop you don't fuck, you don't funk around like that. Bro, Dude, I watch the games. I like both those teams. But yeah, well, and I don't know. I don't know if people are gonna get mad.
But you know, I'm one of those people who's as Niners fan, so.
Whoad. So I'll just say it out.
I'll make the movie, Okay, I would love I'd love to make and bring the Warriors back to Oakland.
God damn oh so okay, let's reopen Oracle be Ah get it?
So Sean t gooes have Kyle and Blake collaborated on a buzzball pickleball collab. I brought a demo of a pickleball made out of an empty buzzballs.
We have not collabed on that just quite yet, but maybe we will. I hope you guys do.
And buzz and we hold no weight with buzzball, so you can barely get buzzballs to the venues. Sometimes they're like, do we have to send more and more? We've kind of made it a thing that we're throwing.
Them out, and they're like, all right, all right guy.
So Zach Thompson wants to know, can you guys energize us tonight and give us the energy friends till the end? Oh wow, no, but we're hoping a portal opens up to another realm.
Yeah, maybe we can. We hope you get some energy from that. I hope so.
So Leslie asked, can you ask the wizards if they will ever perform at the Gathering? The Dark Carnival of the Souls, as Adam likes to call it, is that now it's called the Dark Carnival.
I thought it was called the Dark Carnival. That is what it's called. That's the gathering. I guess that's the gathering. But yeah, we we can ask. Now, we don't have the power to open the portal. They come out when they want to.
But I bet, I bet Juggalos could summon the Wizzards for sure, could power if anybody could jug So Aaron.
Ann would like to know if you were a Thanksgiving song, which would you be? And why, dude, I'm that stuffing damn that's damn.
No boy, you.
Gravy, you smother over everything, the gloves of diarrhea.
I'm green bean casserole. An acquired taste but boy do I love it. But my cousin Devin fucking kills it and she's in the building. I'm gonna have that on Thursday. I want that Castle role girl.
So just justice nives names names, m m all right. Of the four of you, who has there's only three.
R I p.
Dursey's dead to us of the well, No, we could say this for durs Of the four of you, who has the best chance of winning Dancing with the.
Stars, who has the best moves? I don't know. I feel here's here's here's what I think. I think.
Speaking for myself, I think I would probably if I was at peak help, But I'm not.
So I'm gonna give this one to Blake. I think he would. I kind of think that blazing. He also has the hair.
Yeah, but isn't Dancing with the Stars like really technical dancing like you're doing like that you.
Gotta basically be like, please don't stop the mess.
Yeah, I'm going with I'm going with Adam, even if you're hurt. Here's the thing about Adam, he's fucked up. He doesn't even give a fuck once he gets on stage. He's just like.
You, bro, he saw how fucking crazy fast. I was running earlier. Please don't. It's in lane bottom of it's away a simplement a day. Yeah like that. I like that. I'm going to learn the base part of that. I'm sure the party Okay.
So Neville Maddenson wants to know what is the highest paying job outside of the entertainment industry. You think you'd be able to successfully fake it through a day, through at least a day, the highest paying job, at least a day President of the motherfucking United States of America, by Donkey Trump proved that anyone can fake it. That motherfucker does not know what's happening on right now. Joe Biden is fully just asleep. Other people are doing it.
It's incredible.
The last two presidents have been some of my favorite, the funniest, because I'm just the type of guy that you know I would.
I'm an anarchist at heart. I love to see it all burn to the ground, and we're heading that way. Adam would be a president who just makes hella holidays like this is an official holiday. Today is Sizzler Day. Yeah.
In the first party mean bit in the first thirty days of his presidency, Adam devined gave us one and twenty new Holidays his executive power, and he pardoned a lot of people, dude, and then weirdly he turned every water fountain into milk.
Shake water fountain. Yeah, no, htwoo for the kiddy, he's gotta plump him up.
I think I could fake my way through one day of being a crab fisherman, and then I would cry, you.
Think you could deadliest catch? I think I could fake my way through one day. I'm not saying that's why.
He's doing so much pickleball, that low stance to be on the rocking boat, just like.
Yeah, but they get paid a lot. That's why I'm like, that's a high paying job. I can't faking it. Do you mean you just like curl up in a ball and sleep in like the bunk. That's definitely what's happening day two.
Okay for a day, yeah, being like a high stakes like Wall Street trader and just being like, we gotta sell it because you know, you make it through it one day and you go, fuck, I was wrong.
I don't know.
You like let it burn right, You're like Frocter and gamble fucking continent toilet paper. We gotta sell off. And meanwhile they're like, no, everyone needs to wipe their ass running.
I don't know. I feel like I could fudge it through one day of being a lawyer. Oh really, you're constantly going like exactly or like would you be like caveman lawyer? Yeah, just a caveman. I don't understand these flying machines. Oh, you just have to stall. You just have to keep being like, can I approach the bench right? He's like a game. It's like, yeah, man, I would just there's some shit, I gotta go pool again.
So you're day of being a lawyer as you have your chronic diarrhea and the judge being like Jesus, okay another recess guys shitt his fucking pains.
Yeah, there's a certain amount of time you just have to kind of fake having diarrhea. And then they're like, all right, we're gonna continue tomorrow.
Cord A journed. Yeah, I'm done.
So the top guns they want to know, can we get a shout out?
Hey, by the way, love this? No question?
Can we get a shout out to the top I guess that had is question? Can we get a shout out to the three top guns in row three. Okay, Marita, Lindsey and Cheyenne, we want to.
Go to to mam camp baby. Happy early fortieth to shy Lane, I believe.
And then the most important thing, congrats on surviving cancer.
Big shout out there we go, yes, hey, hey, there's the top guns right there, you homies, and congrats on beating cancer.
Fuck cancer. Absolutely sure. But by the way, that is not the third row and it's not even close. Yeah.
Way to flex on the card and then get spotted in row thirteen.
They're like row three, and then they get here and they're like, and that one was in front of the three was to be fair though, they sat you in front of where my own mother is.
So no, those are good.
Those are good seats. These people in the front row were like, this is too close. Yeah, this is too close.
Bill really does smell like shit.
I do, I do.
It's true he kept farting.
Marita wants to know, please ask the crowd what's my favorite word?
Y'all nailed it, And with that, I think we go.
Any take backs, any apologies, any epic slams. Oh yes, I guess I would like to apologize for not making it on that the top balcony. That first buzzball toss when I'm trying to and I hit the side, it exploded, and I just imagined. This is like a fancy old timey theater, And a lot of times when people come to fancy old timey theaters, they wear their favorite minks, you know, minks.
They wear their favorite.
Minks, so they have their nice minks out, and then all of a sudden, a lima rita buzzball.
Rains down upon them, and I ruined their favorite mink. And you have to talk to Isaac and he will repay you for that mink.
Okay, I have a few epic giveaways from my personal collection. First off, I have a Ramon Loriano bobble head. This is uh before they found out he was doing steroids, so he could still throw people out.
That's for you. Then I have a.
Starting lineup Mark McGuire. Oh shit, dude, I'll take that. I'll take that, y'all help me.
I'll take this was also before they found out he did steroids. I'll take that. PREMI Hero pre Hero, after I found out he was on steroids. And then I just want to think, dude, it's dope. That Aliah's here. That's it, you're back. She's next.
I want to give something away from rapbay dot com. Who wants to thistle Washington mactra back the crowd.
The crowd wants that. Oh ship, that was like a mister ax. Yeah, that was like a boomerang. I thought that was going there over there. What about some of these? Oh yeah, what you want to throw some teacher and now we'll do that later. Whatever.
Happy birthday, Birthday, Happy birthday, Happy birthday.
And my dad.
You know, I would just I would like to do an epic slam.
Sure, sure, sure, sure, I would like to do house.
Light sound please for this because I don't want to see their faces when I fucking tear into Blake.
What what? Because I know it's your hometown crowd and.
You're no, hey, you know what, and you're like a super cool dude here okay, yeah, no, hey, I get it.
Boo Blake. I understand you're booing Blake?
What wa dude? You really hurt my feelings earlier? How because you said that I'm a fat fuck.
I did know when we were backstage, I had my shirt off, I'm looking at my body.
I am on currently on medicine that makes me hold on to wait. Okay, Gabba Pennton, look it up.
Your boobs are huge. He was choking. So I'm on this, I know, and I'm on this medicine.
And then Blake go, I'm like, dude, I'm getting some weight and you go, yeah, this is the fattest I've ever seen.
Hurt my feeling. No, I didn't say that, and that could have stayed that stage. The fact that you fucking said that, no, that is no. The fact that you said in front of the like you know, this meant a lot to me tonight. Thank you Oakland for coming out dude.
He was just handering that. He was just noting, no handering. Yes, also, Oakland, thank you for being here. I love the Oakland Okay whatever, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
I love this.
I love this because I actually have another take back, all right, I would love to take back the last twenty fucking years of our friendship because he's.
Fucking what I wish you. I wish it was durs instead of at him. Fucking oh fuck are you you know? Fuck you? I don't fuck you? No, no, I seriously fuck you. What are you gonna do about it. Fuck you don't fuck.
You just fucking or something?
No, what the is going on top stage? No, I'm out of here stage, I'm out of here. Where's the exiting stage? What I'm the one walking off stage? I'm walking off stage very slowly. Oh really, you're walking off there? Where is Where is the exit in this? You dumb ass? I don't even know how to get off the fucking stage, you dumb up. Stop guys, stop stop, just stop for Isaac's too dumb to know how to work.
Just stop, dumb ass, Just give me two seconds and stop for a minute.
Hey, Kyle, are you gonna try to reconcile us. I'm gonna have to hate my best.
Friend for I have a guitar in my hand and I'm not afraid to use it. Please start.
Looking at the window watching rain for dime fu waiting for my best friend, but he's nowhere around. I can't wait until I can see you. I picked up some steaks. We can't have a bambacue.
Me and you shall be friends until the end.
Because you're all my for the fucking best friend. You're my past friend, you're my best friend. You're my best friend until the tea that I die on my past friend. You are my best friend. You're my best friend.
There, tell the tea that I die looking at my window watching car strip by hour. Start fam Just thinking about you tend it makes me want to cry out. I miss you so much since you've been away.
Really, other people start to think that I might be gay like your family.
I just think you are really cool, dude. And sometimes that night I see you in the stars.
You're my best friend. You're my best friend. You're my best friend. And tell that day that I die. You're my best friend. You are my best friend. You are my best friend, and tell that day that I die. He's my best friend.
You are my math friend. You are my best friend.
And tell the data I'm dying and my math friend.
Now I'm my best friend. He is my best friend, and tell the day that die. Friendship fucking rules, dude, And I love Oakland. Yeah, I'm so glad Jersey isn't here. Yeah, fuck Durst, dude. We have to have some epic giveaways. You have to give away.
Get some skirts and shirts away, epic giveaways, ladies and Jerseys.
Fucking wrong, you guys, fucking wrong. Oh Glynn, thank you for coming out right in the center, right down pipe. You know that for dead. We fucking did this ship together again. That's fucking sick as fuck. That's where the coach. My god, so so much Oakland.
Yes, this was such a fun show.
This meant so much with these guys, and you get out up and showed out.
Look at that, look at that, and I woo and this was.
Another episode up this it's important.
Thank you much