Good dight team. It's harps hope, you bloody terrific. Ah. So I want to talk to you about the very common habit of getting stuck, that is spinning our wheels, that is living life or part of our life in a perpetual holding pattern, thinking about doing different while not doing different, talking about doing different and better while not doing it, talking about transformation and improvement and growth and learning and unlearning and becoming the best version of ourselves and exploring our talents and our potential and building our best whatever, while simultaneously not fucking doing it. Ah. And let's be honest. Let's be honest. That's a lot of people a lot of the time. And that's not me being critical. That's me being an observer of people. Also myself being one of those people. So there've been many times in my life when I have been I've been, I guess, trapped in a kind of a holding pattern, a holding pattern of mediocrity, like a groundhole day like same shits, same stuff, same doing the same things with my business or my brand, or my money, or my body, or my relationships or my spiritual life or my mental health or my emotional health or my academic pursuits, my learning, commitment, my training, my nutrition, doing stuff that didn't work, but nonetheless getting up each day and essentially doing a version of what didn't work the last day, month, year, decade sometimes. So I'm very interested in, as you are well know, I'm interested in human potential. I'm interested in possibilities. I'm interested in what we can do, what I can do, what you can do when you and me get out of it own way, when I can get out of my destructive habits, my self destructive self talk, thinking, my shitty lifestyle, not so much these days, but at times, my relationships, my operating system, not just relationships with people, but relationships with food, relationships with my body, relationships with all of the things that I do, habits and behaviors, and stepping into out of the self destruction and the overthinking and the self doubt and the imposter syndrome, and slowly stepping into self awareness and self genuine self improvement and self regulation and self optimization for that matter. So many years, for many years I worked with people who came to me to get in physically, and then more recently last decade or so, you know, mentally and emotionally, but who were stuck and stuck physically sometimes or stuck mentally or emotionally all three, or socially and or socially practically behaviorally, you know, just in this normal operating system that doesn't work. So there's there's a there's a degree of unconsciousness that all of us in habit, and as the name suggests, we're not aware of it. That is, we unconsciously do a lot of things, and we do a lot of things that really will require very very low level decision making in that you know, we've got to open the fridge to get the thing out to put it in our mouth, but it's almost like we do that without thinking, without choosing. It's just a habit, it's a pattern, that's a ritual, it's a behavior. I feel shit. I'm not hungry, I'm not actually hungry, I don't actually need food, but I'm having a bad day. So now I'm grabbing chocolate. Now I'm eating chocolate. I feel a bit flat, I feel a bit anxious. Now I'm grabbing booze. I fit whatever. And so we have a propensity and a tendency, many of us, to do things for an extended period of time, sometimes decades that clearly do not work for us. And when I say do not work, I'm saying do not work on the understanding or the premise that we want to be better. We don't want to be unhealthy. We don't want destructive habits. We don't want to overthink. We don't want to overdrink. We don't want to overeat. We don't want to be the procrastinator. We don't want to be the excuse maker. We don't want to be the avoid or the denier. We want to take ownership, we want to take charge. We want to optimize our genetics, optimize our potential, optimize our IQ, our intellectual capacity, optimize our creativity. We talk all the time, especially in the personal development, self help space, human performance, human behavior, we talk all the time about optimization, that is, getting the most out of ourselves. But truly, truly, as unpopular as this might be, or as uncomfortable as this might be for some to hear, and I don't know you, so clearly it's not personal, or clearly you're one of many listenings, so I'm not targeting you. So all I ask you to do is consider what I'm about to say, and that what I'm about to say is that some of you have probably been doing things that don't work for a very long time, and maybe lots of things that don't work. And if on some level you've kind of resigned yourself to that fact and you're kind of okay with it, then okay. However, if you're not okay with it, if you are sick of being the one day soon person, the almost person, and to so much self help and personal development, behavioral change in neuroscience and neuropsychology and nutrition, and I've read every fucking thing and listen to every fucking thing, But here I am, and I'm still in groundhole day. I'm still spinning my wheels, I'm still going nowhere fast. I'm still in a perpetual holding pattern of mediocrity and dissatisfaction and wasted time, talent, and energy. If that's you, then then one you need to figure out if you're really desperately, passionately committed to changing that, and then two, whether or not you are genuinely willing to pay the price of whatever is required to create that shift on planet you. And this is the big kind of gap. This is the chasm between the idea and the action and the idea. Everyone's in love with the idea. Everyone's in love with the idea of better. Everyone's in love with the idea of lean and and functional and successful and joyful and wealthy and focused and fulfilled. We love all that shit because who doesn't want that. We all want that or a version of that. I rarely speak to people who say I am totally content. I don't want anything else. This is a whole other conversation out by the way. But I'm there. I don't need any more. I'm happy. I'm content, you know, for the most part, not anxious. Life's great. That's generally not the case, and there's another conversation, as I said, to be had around that. But for the moment, I want to talk to you about whether or not you are genuinely ready. Firstly, I'm going to operate on the assumption that you are at the very least interested in getting unstuck, interested in getting out of your own way, interested in stepping out of the rules and habits and rituals and the perpetual holding pattern that you may be in in some areas of your life that doesn't work or don't work, to step out of that. So Firstly, let's talk about what are the drivers? What are the things which cause us to get stuck? And so this list is not in terms of significance or important. They are all equally important. And some of these may relate to you, some of them may not. It's seven or eight or nine maybe, And some of them seem like overly simple. Well, come on, Craig, I need more than that. I need some deeper science. I need something more profound than that. I need something more wise and insightful and deep than laziness. For example, this sounds funny, but I just meet people who are fucking lazy, and that's why they're stuck. It's not even that they're scared. They're just lazy. They just don't They just don't want to do the work. They like the idea of the outcome. They like the idea of the destination, but they are not ready to get up every day and walk the path, or drive the path, or take the path, or or take the journey. Like the destination, the idea of the outcome is brilliant, but the idea of doing what's required to create that outcome, they're like, ah soon. And so you know, if laziness is the overriding kind of factor, then we're stuck. And so that and I think sometimes that that kind of general apathy, laziness, apathy, lack of motivation, perhaps they're tied in together. And my my thoughts, this is not science, this is my thoughts. I think that, as I've said a lot on this show, there's almost like a psychological and or emotional tipping point for a lot of us, and that is we kind of just go. We just kind of trudge along in blah, you know, in Blasville, in mediocrity in three out of ten, and it's not fulfilling or rewarding or awesome or joyful, but it's also not complete shit. It's okay. There are moments of okayness, and you know, until we get to that point where we associate more pain, we're staying in it than getting out of it. Most of us will stay in it. And you can see as an observer of human behavior, you can see people staying in things, sometimes relationships or jobs or situations or circumstances, environments or patterns or habits, staying in things that really don't work, but on some level they're scared of the option. They're scared of the work, They're scared of the unknown, They're scared of the uncertainty. Should they shut the door on that thing and step away and head in a new direction with no safety in it? So fear comes into it, laziness, apathy, fear. Mindset. Now, when I talk about mindset, clearly we could and we have done many shows on this, but it's you know, being aware that my mind is not in charge of me. I am in charge of my mind. And yes I'm not talking about my brain here. My brain is different, is a different animal. But in terms of managing regulating my thoughts, what I pay attention to, what I focus on? Am I the problem person? Am I the solution person? Am I making good decisions? How do I process the world around me? What is the thing that happened? What is my story that I'm telling myself about the thing that happened? Why do I think the way that I think? Where does my thinking come from? What role does my programming play in my current internal paradigm, in my internal framework? What role does my programming play in terms of how I live and what I do and my values and so on. So, becoming aware of these internal kind of drivers that influence perhaps determine whether or not we stay stuck or we move self doubt. Self doubt is like almost a pandemic, you know, aversion to discomfort spoken about a lot of times. People want the work, they don't want the pain, self limiting thinking, crap, self esteem, and so on. And the truth is that at some stage, should we really want to move forward, we need to feel what we feel. Feel lazy, feel not good enough, feel like a fraud, feel like an impostor, but nonetheless start the ball rolling. I've spent most of my life still feeling like the insecure, fat kid that got picked last for every sporting team. At some stages, I feel like that. I don't feel like literally that, I just that those emotional and psychological remnants live on. You know. I could be in the middle of, like right now, sharing this with you, at the same time feeling like, oh, this is shit and no one's going to enjoy it. Like that. Self doubt never fully goes away from me, that imposter syndrome, not good enough, not smart enough, not academic enough, not lean enough, not likable enough, not fucking it what. That stuff never fully goes away. It doesn't dominate me, it doesn't render me paralyzed. But but do I ever feel supremely confident? Never? I never feel that I feel somewhat confident. I feel content and pretty calm and pretty satisfied most of the time. But what I know is that the psychological awareness that I can do things, I'm not useless. I can succeed, I can write well, I can speak well, I can talk to an audience. I can build a business and brand, while also knowing that I've fucked up a lot of things and all of that. But that knowledge that I can do well, oh, exists at the same time with those feelings, those emotions of inadequacy and self doubt and periodic self loathing. And that's not weird or broken or terrible. That's normal. Even the people that I've worked with that many of you would know that are high performers in the areas of sports or politics, or media or entertainment or the creative arts. Some of the people that I've worked with that are wildly successful are also insecure, also riddled with self doubt, also have self esteem issues, also could talk themselves into analysis paralysis in a second. So if any of that is you, that is not a reason to not succeed. You can be scared and successful. You can be inherently kind of naturally lazy while choosing to be active and proactive. You can do that. You can override things. My genetic default setting is endomorphic, which is I gain fat very easily. But my genetics don't need to be my destiny because what I'll look, feel, and function like is about twenty to thirty about my genetics. The rest is about what I do, and what I do is optional. What I eat is optional, how I live is optional. How I move my body, whether or not I drink booze or use drugs, or how I sleep or how much I sleep, or how I put all this shit together. My my overarching values, my overarching operating system for life. There are we can rationalize anything if we want, if we want to come up with a reason why we're not succeeding and life's not fair and my mum did this or my dad. And I'm not trying to be disrespectful to people who've been through legit trauma. Of course we recognize that and respect that. But at the same time, guess what a lot of people have been through trauma and a lot of people have been through some horrible shit. I interviewed Joelsarti the other day, who's speaking on our program, who went to Afghanistan, served for Australia in the military, spent eight months there on an active tour, came back, was having a quick break before he went back to Afghanistan, fell over railing railing on some stairs, broke his neck, broke his neck is a quadriplegic. Now, if anyone's got a reason to get stuck, it's that, dude. If you want to rationalize doing nothing, feeling sorry for yourself, being in a holding pattern, you know, getting stuck in all kinds of ways, you would look at, at least from the outside looking in, and look at that scenario and what happened to Jijol and go, man, I get it, I get it. But guess what, He's not stuck in the middle of the mess and the mayhem and the pain and the dysfunction and the physiological limitations and all of the challenges, massive challenges of adapting to a brand new life in a body that doesn't work as it once did. In the middle of all of that, he's growing and he's learning and he's developing skills and insight and awareness, and he's courageous and he's doing fucking amazing shit, and you can do too. We all can. It doesn't mean we can all do anything. We can't all run one hundred meters in ten seconds. We can't all win a Grammy. We can't all become president or prime minister. We can't just practically, we can't because we can't have a million prime ministers at once. But there's a lot of stuff that we can do. There's a lot of stuff that we can do. So let's have a look at some ideas on how to get unstuck. So I've got a list for you, because you know the occasional list doesn't hurt. Number one is, recognize your stuckness. Like that, recognize that you are stuck, that you are trapped, that you are in a holding pattern, that you are spinning your wheels, whatever metaphor you want to to use, but recognize that you are stuck and identify the cause. So for a very long time, for example, with my body, my stuckness, my holding pattern, my inability to look or feel, or perform or achieve the level of health and performance and body composition that I wanted for me. The cause was food, specifically, my relationship with food, specifically, how I thought about food, how I chose food, how I behaved with food and around food, how I socialized, how I bullshitted myself with food, how I lied to people. People would ask me about what I eat, and I would be too embarrassed at times to tell them really what I ate sometimes, so I would make up some bullshit to sound good, And so I was in a holding pattern. I was stuck. I had this toxic, destructive relationship with food. By the way, food wasn't problem. I was the problem. It's just that food was the epicenter of the problem. And so that was for me, you know, owning up and stepping up and being honest and raw and real. And the reason that I share that this was part of my journey is because I know other people do the same. I know that I don't live on an island in this respect. I'm not Robinson Cruzoe. I'm not the only person to have done this. I've spoken to maybe thousands of people who have very very complicated relationships with their body, very complicated relationships with food and with exercise and with self esteem and with body image and body dysmorphia. And I think the starting point for a lot of us, the unstuck, getting unstruck starting point is just being fucking honest. I eat shit. I don't need the end not ah yeah, but my genetics. But yeah, but you know, I didn't want to offend anyone, but oh it was all I could get my hands on. Ah, but it was my birthday. Oh but it was. It was you know, and you're fifty there, and now you're fifty and you're still telling yourself why you're not doing the things that you allegedly want to do. Like, you will not accidentally get in great shape. You will not accidentally have a fucking awesome body, awesome health, amazing immune system. You will not accidentally run a fucking marathon or whatever it is that or build a business or build a brand, or do an undergrad degree or overcoming it. You'll not accidentally do these things. We need to acknowledge the reality of us. This is why I'm doing a Part of why I'm doing a PhD in self awareness, literally is because self awareness with so much of this stuff is the starting point. Not self loathing, not self hate, self awareness. This is what I'm doing okay, my life's not working in this context. What part of the problem am I. It's not to say you're always the totality of the problem, but let's just be brave for a moment and courageous and grown up and mature and let's go, yeah, look, at least I'm part of the problem, all right. Number two is this, identify the thing that you're not doing that you should be doing. So what might that be for you? Maybe that is maybe that is you need to study thirty minutes every morning. Maybe that is you need to start having a cold shower every day. Maybe that is you need to commit to some I don't know what it is, doesn't matter. It could be something to do with your kids or your partner. Could be something to do with your career. Could be something to do with your physical, mental, or emotional health. It could be something to do with a toxic relationship that you need to deal with. It could be something to do with your lifestyle. It could be a million things. But what is the thing that you're not doing that you know you should be. Number three is kind of an expansion of that, and that is to do a stock take or audit on what's working and what's not working on planet you. And this is not something that you do in three minutes driving to work, listening to the radio, looking for a park. This is something that I think really we need to take seriously about when we talk about living consciously. We spoke before about unconscious stuff and how you know. In many ways, for a range of reasons, many of us are periodic passengers in our own life. Life. That is, life has its own energy, Life has its own life force, Life has its own momentum, and life happens despite us. Life keeps going on, and the things that we are in the middle of have their own momentum and energy as well. And sometimes we need to get out of that river, that ever flowing river that we are sitting in our canoe just being swept that we need to paddle to the side. We need to get to the metaphoric bank, pull up our canoe and our paddle, sit on the metaphoric rock and just take a minute. Take a minute, get out of the river, get out of the momentum, get out of the busyness, get out of the never endingness, even if it's for thirty minutes to sit no phone, no computer, no distractions, just you thinking about how's my life going? How is my life going, How's my body going? What about my rituals? What about my social life? What about? What about my sleep? What about my self talk? What about my mental health? How's that going on? What's that about? What about? What about the results that I'm producing? Are they the results I want to produce? If not, why not? What am I doing? What could I do better? One of the challenges for us is that, obviously my world view is subjective. All of my experiences are influenced by the goings on in my external world, but ultimately created by me. And when I say me, I say my brain, my mind, my data processing center. I am always doing a subjective assessment and interpretation of objective things. Something happens to me around me despite me a person, a situation and outcome, a result, the weather, some piece of news. Then what I do, automatically and almost unconsciously, is I break it down and I give it meaning. And one of the challenges for us, in the continuity and the never endingness of the human experience and the never ending stream of information and energy and people and events, is to be able to find some space, some metaphoric space, sometimes some literal space to say, well, here I am, I'm thirty, I'm forty, I'm fifty. How long have I been thinking about changing these things? How many times have I had the same story or told myself the same or others the same story about the same things that I'm going to change soon. I'm going to I'm doing it soon. But here I am, and now I'm fifty and I'm not doing it. What are the things that on planet me are not working? And what are the things that are working? What are my results telling me? What's my life telling me? What are my relationships telling me? Things won't accidentally get better? You and I will do the audit. We will observe the thing, recognize the thing, we'll take ownership of the thing, and then we'll work to change the thing that needs to be changed, or we won't. That's up to you, that's up to me. All right, team, I'm going to interrupt myself there. We're going to call this. This went longer than I anticipated, So we're going to call this bit where I'm at right now, the end of part one. I hope you're enjoying it. I think this is a really important conversation. We'll be back tomorrow with the end the Conclusion Part two. See then

Good dight team. It's harps hope, you bloody terrific. Ah. So I want to talk to you about the very common habit of getting stuck, that is spinning our wheels, that is living life or part of our life in a perpetual holding pattern, thinking about doing different while not doing different, talking about doing different and better while not doing it, talking about transformation and improvement and growth and learning and unlearning and becoming the best version of ourselves and exploring our talents and our potential and building our best whatever, while simultaneously not fucking doing it. Ah. And let's be honest. Let's be honest. That's a lot of people a lot of the time. And that's not me being critical. That's me being an observer of people. Also myself being one of those people. So there've been many times in my life when I have been I've been, I guess, trapped in a kind of a holding pattern, a holding pattern of mediocrity, like a groundhole day like same shits, same stuff, same doing the same things with my business or my brand, or my money, or my body, or my relationships or my spiritual life or my mental health or my emotional health or my academic pursuits, my learning, commitment, my training, my nutrition, doing stuff that didn't work, but nonetheless getting up each day and essentially doing a version of what didn't work the last day, month, year, decade sometimes. So I'm very interested in, as you are well know, I'm interested in human potential. I'm interested in possibilities. I'm interested in what we can do, what I can do, what you can do when you and me get out of it own way, when I can get out of my destructive habits, my self destructive self talk, thinking, my shitty lifestyle, not so much these days, but at times, my relationships, my operating system, not just relationships with people, but relationships with food, relationships with my body, relationships with all of the things that I do, habits and behaviors, and stepping into out of the self destruction and the overthinking and the self doubt and the imposter syndrome, and slowly stepping into self awareness and self genuine self improvement and self regulation and self optimization for that matter. So many years, for many years I worked with people who came to me to get in physically, and then more recently last decade or so, you know, mentally and emotionally, but who were stuck and stuck physically sometimes or stuck mentally or emotionally all three, or socially and or socially practically behaviorally, you know, just in this normal operating system that doesn't work. So there's there's a there's a degree of unconsciousness that all of us in habit, and as the name suggests, we're not aware of it. That is, we unconsciously do a lot of things, and we do a lot of things that really will require very very low level decision making in that you know, we've got to open the fridge to get the thing out to put it in our mouth, but it's almost like we do that without thinking, without choosing. It's just a habit, it's a pattern, that's a ritual, it's a behavior. I feel shit. I'm not hungry, I'm not actually hungry, I don't actually need food, but I'm having a bad day. So now I'm grabbing chocolate. Now I'm eating chocolate. I feel a bit flat, I feel a bit anxious. Now I'm grabbing booze. I fit whatever. And so we have a propensity and a tendency, many of us, to do things for an extended period of time, sometimes decades that clearly do not work for us. And when I say do not work, I'm saying do not work on the understanding or the premise that we want to be better. We don't want to be unhealthy. We don't want destructive habits. We don't want to overthink. We don't want to overdrink. We don't want to overeat. We don't want to be the procrastinator. We don't want to be the excuse maker. We don't want to be the avoid or the denier. We want to take ownership, we want to take charge. We want to optimize our genetics, optimize our potential, optimize our IQ, our intellectual capacity, optimize our creativity. We talk all the time, especially in the personal development, self help space, human performance, human behavior, we talk all the time about optimization, that is, getting the most out of ourselves. But truly, truly, as unpopular as this might be, or as uncomfortable as this might be for some to hear, and I don't know you, so clearly it's not personal, or clearly you're one of many listenings, so I'm not targeting you. So all I ask you to do is consider what I'm about to say, and that what I'm about to say is that some of you have probably been doing things that don't work for a very long time, and maybe lots of things that don't work. And if on some level you've kind of resigned yourself to that fact and you're kind of okay with it, then okay. However, if you're not okay with it, if you are sick of being the one day soon person, the almost person, and to so much self help and personal development, behavioral change in neuroscience and neuropsychology and nutrition, and I've read every fucking thing and listen to every fucking thing, But here I am, and I'm still in groundhole day. I'm still spinning my wheels, I'm still going nowhere fast. I'm still in a perpetual holding pattern of mediocrity and dissatisfaction and wasted time, talent, and energy. If that's you, then then one you need to figure out if you're really desperately, passionately committed to changing that, and then two, whether or not you are genuinely willing to pay the price of whatever is required to create that shift on planet you. And this is the big kind of gap. This is the chasm between the idea and the action and the idea. Everyone's in love with the idea. Everyone's in love with the idea of better. Everyone's in love with the idea of lean and and functional and successful and joyful and wealthy and focused and fulfilled. We love all that shit because who doesn't want that. We all want that or a version of that. I rarely speak to people who say I am totally content. I don't want anything else. This is a whole other conversation out by the way. But I'm there. I don't need any more. I'm happy. I'm content, you know, for the most part, not anxious. Life's great. That's generally not the case, and there's another conversation, as I said, to be had around that. But for the moment, I want to talk to you about whether or not you are genuinely ready. Firstly, I'm going to operate on the assumption that you are at the very least interested in getting unstuck, interested in getting out of your own way, interested in stepping out of the rules and habits and rituals and the perpetual holding pattern that you may be in in some areas of your life that doesn't work or don't work, to step out of that. So Firstly, let's talk about what are the drivers? What are the things which cause us to get stuck? And so this list is not in terms of significance or important. They are all equally important. And some of these may relate to you, some of them may not. It's seven or eight or nine maybe, And some of them seem like overly simple. Well, come on, Craig, I need more than that. I need some deeper science. I need something more profound than that. I need something more wise and insightful and deep than laziness. For example, this sounds funny, but I just meet people who are fucking lazy, and that's why they're stuck. It's not even that they're scared. They're just lazy. They just don't They just don't want to do the work. They like the idea of the outcome. They like the idea of the destination, but they are not ready to get up every day and walk the path, or drive the path, or take the path, or or take the journey. Like the destination, the idea of the outcome is brilliant, but the idea of doing what's required to create that outcome, they're like, ah soon. And so you know, if laziness is the overriding kind of factor, then we're stuck. And so that and I think sometimes that that kind of general apathy, laziness, apathy, lack of motivation, perhaps they're tied in together. And my my thoughts, this is not science, this is my thoughts. I think that, as I've said a lot on this show, there's almost like a psychological and or emotional tipping point for a lot of us, and that is we kind of just go. We just kind of trudge along in blah, you know, in Blasville, in mediocrity in three out of ten, and it's not fulfilling or rewarding or awesome or joyful, but it's also not complete shit. It's okay. There are moments of okayness, and you know, until we get to that point where we associate more pain, we're staying in it than getting out of it. Most of us will stay in it. And you can see as an observer of human behavior, you can see people staying in things, sometimes relationships or jobs or situations or circumstances, environments or patterns or habits, staying in things that really don't work, but on some level they're scared of the option. They're scared of the work, They're scared of the unknown, They're scared of the uncertainty. Should they shut the door on that thing and step away and head in a new direction with no safety in it? So fear comes into it, laziness, apathy, fear. Mindset. Now, when I talk about mindset, clearly we could and we have done many shows on this, but it's you know, being aware that my mind is not in charge of me. I am in charge of my mind. And yes I'm not talking about my brain here. My brain is different, is a different animal. But in terms of managing regulating my thoughts, what I pay attention to, what I focus on? Am I the problem person? Am I the solution person? Am I making good decisions? How do I process the world around me? What is the thing that happened? What is my story that I'm telling myself about the thing that happened? Why do I think the way that I think? Where does my thinking come from? What role does my programming play in my current internal paradigm, in my internal framework? What role does my programming play in terms of how I live and what I do and my values and so on. So, becoming aware of these internal kind of drivers that influence perhaps determine whether or not we stay stuck or we move self doubt. Self doubt is like almost a pandemic, you know, aversion to discomfort spoken about a lot of times. People want the work, they don't want the pain, self limiting thinking, crap, self esteem, and so on. And the truth is that at some stage, should we really want to move forward, we need to feel what we feel. Feel lazy, feel not good enough, feel like a fraud, feel like an impostor, but nonetheless start the ball rolling. I've spent most of my life still feeling like the insecure, fat kid that got picked last for every sporting team. At some stages, I feel like that. I don't feel like literally that, I just that those emotional and psychological remnants live on. You know. I could be in the middle of, like right now, sharing this with you, at the same time feeling like, oh, this is shit and no one's going to enjoy it. Like that. Self doubt never fully goes away from me, that imposter syndrome, not good enough, not smart enough, not academic enough, not lean enough, not likable enough, not fucking it what. That stuff never fully goes away. It doesn't dominate me, it doesn't render me paralyzed. But but do I ever feel supremely confident? Never? I never feel that I feel somewhat confident. I feel content and pretty calm and pretty satisfied most of the time. But what I know is that the psychological awareness that I can do things, I'm not useless. I can succeed, I can write well, I can speak well, I can talk to an audience. I can build a business and brand, while also knowing that I've fucked up a lot of things and all of that. But that knowledge that I can do well, oh, exists at the same time with those feelings, those emotions of inadequacy and self doubt and periodic self loathing. And that's not weird or broken or terrible. That's normal. Even the people that I've worked with that many of you would know that are high performers in the areas of sports or politics, or media or entertainment or the creative arts. Some of the people that I've worked with that are wildly successful are also insecure, also riddled with self doubt, also have self esteem issues, also could talk themselves into analysis paralysis in a second. So if any of that is you, that is not a reason to not succeed. You can be scared and successful. You can be inherently kind of naturally lazy while choosing to be active and proactive. You can do that. You can override things. My genetic default setting is endomorphic, which is I gain fat very easily. But my genetics don't need to be my destiny because what I'll look, feel, and function like is about twenty to thirty about my genetics. The rest is about what I do, and what I do is optional. What I eat is optional, how I live is optional. How I move my body, whether or not I drink booze or use drugs, or how I sleep or how much I sleep, or how I put all this shit together. My my overarching values, my overarching operating system for life. There are we can rationalize anything if we want, if we want to come up with a reason why we're not succeeding and life's not fair and my mum did this or my dad. And I'm not trying to be disrespectful to people who've been through legit trauma. Of course we recognize that and respect that. But at the same time, guess what a lot of people have been through trauma and a lot of people have been through some horrible shit. I interviewed Joelsarti the other day, who's speaking on our program, who went to Afghanistan, served for Australia in the military, spent eight months there on an active tour, came back, was having a quick break before he went back to Afghanistan, fell over railing railing on some stairs, broke his neck, broke his neck is a quadriplegic. Now, if anyone's got a reason to get stuck, it's that, dude. If you want to rationalize doing nothing, feeling sorry for yourself, being in a holding pattern, you know, getting stuck in all kinds of ways, you would look at, at least from the outside looking in, and look at that scenario and what happened to Jijol and go, man, I get it, I get it. But guess what, He's not stuck in the middle of the mess and the mayhem and the pain and the dysfunction and the physiological limitations and all of the challenges, massive challenges of adapting to a brand new life in a body that doesn't work as it once did. In the middle of all of that, he's growing and he's learning and he's developing skills and insight and awareness, and he's courageous and he's doing fucking amazing shit, and you can do too. We all can. It doesn't mean we can all do anything. We can't all run one hundred meters in ten seconds. We can't all win a Grammy. We can't all become president or prime minister. We can't just practically, we can't because we can't have a million prime ministers at once. But there's a lot of stuff that we can do. There's a lot of stuff that we can do. So let's have a look at some ideas on how to get unstuck. So I've got a list for you, because you know the occasional list doesn't hurt. Number one is, recognize your stuckness. Like that, recognize that you are stuck, that you are trapped, that you are in a holding pattern, that you are spinning your wheels, whatever metaphor you want to to use, but recognize that you are stuck and identify the cause. So for a very long time, for example, with my body, my stuckness, my holding pattern, my inability to look or feel, or perform or achieve the level of health and performance and body composition that I wanted for me. The cause was food, specifically, my relationship with food, specifically, how I thought about food, how I chose food, how I behaved with food and around food, how I socialized, how I bullshitted myself with food, how I lied to people. People would ask me about what I eat, and I would be too embarrassed at times to tell them really what I ate sometimes, so I would make up some bullshit to sound good, And so I was in a holding pattern. I was stuck. I had this toxic, destructive relationship with food. By the way, food wasn't problem. I was the problem. It's just that food was the epicenter of the problem. And so that was for me, you know, owning up and stepping up and being honest and raw and real. And the reason that I share that this was part of my journey is because I know other people do the same. I know that I don't live on an island in this respect. I'm not Robinson Cruzoe. I'm not the only person to have done this. I've spoken to maybe thousands of people who have very very complicated relationships with their body, very complicated relationships with food and with exercise and with self esteem and with body image and body dysmorphia. And I think the starting point for a lot of us, the unstuck, getting unstruck starting point is just being fucking honest. I eat shit. I don't need the end not ah yeah, but my genetics. But yeah, but you know, I didn't want to offend anyone, but oh it was all I could get my hands on. Ah, but it was my birthday. Oh but it was. It was you know, and you're fifty there, and now you're fifty and you're still telling yourself why you're not doing the things that you allegedly want to do. Like, you will not accidentally get in great shape. You will not accidentally have a fucking awesome body, awesome health, amazing immune system. You will not accidentally run a fucking marathon or whatever it is that or build a business or build a brand, or do an undergrad degree or overcoming it. You'll not accidentally do these things. We need to acknowledge the reality of us. This is why I'm doing a Part of why I'm doing a PhD in self awareness, literally is because self awareness with so much of this stuff is the starting point. Not self loathing, not self hate, self awareness. This is what I'm doing okay, my life's not working in this context. What part of the problem am I. It's not to say you're always the totality of the problem, but let's just be brave for a moment and courageous and grown up and mature and let's go, yeah, look, at least I'm part of the problem, all right. Number two is this, identify the thing that you're not doing that you should be doing. So what might that be for you? Maybe that is maybe that is you need to study thirty minutes every morning. Maybe that is you need to start having a cold shower every day. Maybe that is you need to commit to some I don't know what it is, doesn't matter. It could be something to do with your kids or your partner. Could be something to do with your career. Could be something to do with your physical, mental, or emotional health. It could be something to do with a toxic relationship that you need to deal with. It could be something to do with your lifestyle. It could be a million things. But what is the thing that you're not doing that you know you should be. Number three is kind of an expansion of that, and that is to do a stock take or audit on what's working and what's not working on planet you. And this is not something that you do in three minutes driving to work, listening to the radio, looking for a park. This is something that I think really we need to take seriously about when we talk about living consciously. We spoke before about unconscious stuff and how you know. In many ways, for a range of reasons, many of us are periodic passengers in our own life. Life. That is, life has its own energy, Life has its own life force, Life has its own momentum, and life happens despite us. Life keeps going on, and the things that we are in the middle of have their own momentum and energy as well. And sometimes we need to get out of that river, that ever flowing river that we are sitting in our canoe just being swept that we need to paddle to the side. We need to get to the metaphoric bank, pull up our canoe and our paddle, sit on the metaphoric rock and just take a minute. Take a minute, get out of the river, get out of the momentum, get out of the busyness, get out of the never endingness, even if it's for thirty minutes to sit no phone, no computer, no distractions, just you thinking about how's my life going? How is my life going, How's my body going? What about my rituals? What about my social life? What about? What about my sleep? What about my self talk? What about my mental health? How's that going on? What's that about? What about? What about the results that I'm producing? Are they the results I want to produce? If not, why not? What am I doing? What could I do better? One of the challenges for us is that, obviously my world view is subjective. All of my experiences are influenced by the goings on in my external world, but ultimately created by me. And when I say me, I say my brain, my mind, my data processing center. I am always doing a subjective assessment and interpretation of objective things. Something happens to me around me despite me a person, a situation and outcome, a result, the weather, some piece of news. Then what I do, automatically and almost unconsciously, is I break it down and I give it meaning. And one of the challenges for us, in the continuity and the never endingness of the human experience and the never ending stream of information and energy and people and events, is to be able to find some space, some metaphoric space, sometimes some literal space to say, well, here I am, I'm thirty, I'm forty, I'm fifty. How long have I been thinking about changing these things? How many times have I had the same story or told myself the same or others the same story about the same things that I'm going to change soon. I'm going to I'm doing it soon. But here I am, and now I'm fifty and I'm not doing it. What are the things that on planet me are not working? And what are the things that are working? What are my results telling me? What's my life telling me? What are my relationships telling me? Things won't accidentally get better? You and I will do the audit. We will observe the thing, recognize the thing, we'll take ownership of the thing, and then we'll work to change the thing that needs to be changed, or we won't. That's up to you, that's up to me. All right, team, I'm going to interrupt myself there. We're going to call this. This went longer than I anticipated, So we're going to call this bit where I'm at right now, the end of part one. I hope you're enjoying it. I think this is a really important conversation. We'll be back tomorrow with the end the Conclusion Part two. See then