Daniela continues her chat with Dana Dúbravská, transformation and mental strength coach. Daniela and Dana discuss mental health and athletes, including the DNA of what it takes to be both mentally and physically fit.
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So again another beautiful comparison there is that the best players in the world, the difference is they played the big points better than the rest. That's that's the nice metaphor. And basically because I think the goal for most of us it's to be the best versions of ourselves. It is so like you said, to be that in the right moment of our life, just like in the right moments of the match. And you want your mind to be there with you if you don't want, because the unconscious mind, it's uh many times it behaves unexpectedly and you need to somehow engage with that part of yourself throughout the year. So you have that part of your mind on your side in the important points or in the important manage. Of course, sometimes it's other things, you know, if you're physically well and so on. But but a huge part with it also the mind. I mean, let's just not the overwhealue the mind here as well, to have a balanced polarities. But a lot of times I think it's important to to have have have your mind there with you not to do something unexpected, you know, not to not to overreact to something because a lot of times what I see in tennis, that players get carried away in a moment through something that happens, and then they stop being here now, and you can see, like several points later, they are still in that moment that was like five minutes ago. And and this is when the mind is betraying you because you you would ideally want your mind to be there with you and focusing on that moment and doing physically and and play playing wise and mentally wise. You want them to be one team. Uh, that the new point and not you know, five minutes later. But I agree that you didn't play the best shot. So talking about being in that point and here, now, how much meditation has the importance here? I personally I love meditation. I I mean I personally meditate for for more than a twelve years or so. But also meditation can be a one sided story. So I think a meditation is number one thing how to focus on here now if we do the meditation correctly, because sometimes a lot of people confuse meditation with relaxation, and they, you know, meditate, but they put music on and so on, and it's more of a relaxation. But but when you when you urologically do it right, then it's about focusing on here and now, on your briefing. And you know, if you get the thought, you you you acknowledge it, then you send it to and so on. So so if it's done how it should be, then it's it's a wonderful thing for for here now. But it's not no magic peel or it's not a substitute. For some people, it can serve as escape from reality or just something as a positive thinking. And that's that's again one sidedness. So I mean, we should not overvalue it. It's not a magic feel, but it's it's important. Scientifically, it's proven that it works. You know, there are there are many, many, many, many great pieces of research that they talk about it. So I mean meditation, uh, in the world of sport, in the world of business, it's a wonderful tool. But you know, it's like with some spiritual practices or yoga and so on, it can be an escape from here and now and escape from reality. Also in terms of positive thinking. It's it's a great tool, but it's just one part of the coin. And we should also be friends with that part, uh, with the negative part, and and and embrace that and and and find the gift in the in the aggression in the art or guns in the stupidity and everything. So I mean and the same goes with meditation. Too much of a good thing and can be can can serve as the avoidance of what we need to deal with. For example, uh dona. One of the other um emotions I need to discuss with you is UM. I think most of the players are like that, UM because on the court it's kind of you know, no one's gonna play the match for you. You have to be the leader. You have to have that kind of a strong you know, decision making. How do you balance that between having that strong mind? Okay, right, this is what I'm gonna do. This is my game plan, this is my tactic. At the same time, not having that stubbornness where you need to be all open to your team, to the people around you, UM to to be able to learn and willing to improve and let that let that goal oriented in mind to kind of relax and listen to what people are telling you around. I think it goes to the same point. And then I think emotions are one of the most important topics in terms of healthy mental health mindset, in terms of I mean in life in general, but in terms of professional sports and pennis. I think emotions are something that really it's like another energy or power that have within you that can be utilized. No, because you have the physical strengths, but emotions are are chemicals in a way. Emotions are something that's also physical because you know it's it's hormones and neurotransmitters and so on and and uh, you know, emotions are released or the sponse of the body. Uh, it's to something it's external. You have a specific trigger, and you know the emotion is our reaction and and you know it's actually you know, in in neuro science we divide emotions and then feelings and emotions is that body part or the physical part where it tastes like one quarter of a second for us to identify the trigger and then one quarter of a second to produce the chemicals and then the whole chemical reaction. Uh, it only lasts about six sex seconds actually, So I think this is this is a wonderful thing to keep in mind that emotions in terms of our body, how we'll build, you know, how we develops through evolution. The physical part when the hormones and and neuro transmitters. It's just six seconds. Science called feelings, and this is how our mind, how we integrate it, and how we think about it. No, so this this is maybe something that's interesting that emotions they have a feeling part. I mean, they have the part that's the physical when when the physical reaction comes, and then we have the emotions or I mean that second part that we call the feeling. And that's our interpretation. What do you say about it? Does that make sense or mean? So it is in terms of the us me as a person, where what I do at work, or in terms of business, or in terms of tennis. That it's good to know that. Okay, we have power over it because one once, it's the physical direction that's actually here to navigate us. No, because it's how we judge things, how we value things. You know, we need this is dangerous, you know, we feel fear that's helping us, you know, not to do something and so on. So that's like like a compass. And and then it's another part what we make out of it. No, So basically our feelings is the description of the emotions. Yeah, it's what we attribute to it. Yes, And and that's that's the problem in a way because we uh, and it's a problem when you're stopping it too early or too much, because the body needs that reaction. It's like a muscle. You know, you have sore muscles, doctor training, they need to recover. It's a chemical reaction and so on. So you know it's it's physical and and we need those six seconds so you know, the body reaction goes through. And then of course we are starting to think and and we attributed. And it's interesting because the word feel, we use it like I feel called in terms of physical when I feel cold because it's winter and my body is called. But I can say I feel cold because the other person is not the friendly to me. So no, we we we it's it's the it's the judgment and it's our thinking about things. And we talk about feeling in terms of mind, but in terms of body as well. And and this is something that can be work on in terms of my awareness that of course, okay, I need those emotions to go through. What's great tool for for anyone and and for tennis players as well, to to release a part of the brain that's always switch on when we feel emotions, to name it in a in a personal way in the first language, like I feel angry, I feel annoyed, I feel said, I feel irritated, I feel excited. It's good, uh, because then it comes from the part of the brain that is like so called simply emotional brain to the first the front part of the brain that's more about cognitive function, and then it loses the power, not that it loses the distractive power of the emotion. So when you name the emotion for yourself, you are somehow on the on the on the right track of of of you know, going through the right I mean simply with right chemical reaction and and after reaction of the of the judging mind. That does it make saying, because then I said like, oh, I'm not angry, I'm not angry, Then it never switches off that part of the brain responsible for the emotions. So so it's better to say, okay, I am angry, I am said I'm annoyed, and leave it at that and move on. It's easier said than done. But this is just the first step, because a lot of people want to switch to the positive, like I'm not angry, I'm calm, I'm calm. But before you switch to the uncount When you make a mistake on court and you play the worst point uh that you really don't like, you first need to say I'm so angry, and then you have to say I'm coming. If you skip that part, it carries on with you and and it makes you more more more problematic. And so you say I'm so angry and stick with it for those sides six seconds. If you don't, it's gonna stay in that back of your mind. Like if we could say it's still in the back of my mind, it's literally literally physically there. Yes, it will not be in front of your life, in the front of your mind where you can catch it or work with it now because because the conscious part of the brain very very simply put it now, uh, in terms of neuroscience, is the pre front, the cortex, the front of your mind where the thing it is and you want to uh have because because once it's in the unconscious very sly put the unconscious part of the brain is the emotional that you know inherited from him, that they are similar with with some kind of animals. That that that I don't want to go uh too much into science, but you need to have it in your hands. You don't want the animal instinct to, you know, deal with your life. You want that animal instinct for the strong shot. You don't want it for keeping you in anger. No, it's not that animal instinct is wrong. You just need to have it in the surf, not in your thinking. In terms of a tennis match, in a very basic, simple way to put it, you need to get it from here in front of so behind your head. It's like if you have to play a ball that's behind you, you're not gonna be able to make the shot run once you have it in front of you. Once you say I'm angry, you're basically moving that emotion in front of you so you can really name it and see it and then you can work with it. Just like if you're playing, imagine you want to see the ball in front of you. If it's behind you, the chances are that you're not gonna make a good shot. Very very simply. But I think it's a wonderful metaphor, and what's important we need to acknowledge it in the first person tense. I cannot say like, e uh, how to say like it made me angry? No? I am angry? Yeah, yeah, I mean, if you say it made me at least there's the me. But the best way it's uh, because we should not talk about it as a thing, you know, like so basically not to say, well, you know that ball did this to me now or we have this is an angry situation. That's not gonna help exactly. This is what I want to say. I cannot say like this is an angry situation. I have to say I am angry because this and this is going on. No. Now, what happens when we as tennis players, we do have the tendency, as you know, we take it to the next level and we call ourselves different names, and that is very much in first person. What happens then, and it's more than for six seconds. How do you get out of that during a match? Yeah, I mean this is uh, this is a great example and uh yeah, and it's something that that really needs to be work on before the match in a way, because I mean, it can help in the short term sometimes. You know, we all seen it. You know, even even like uh, you know, approach which is strict and which punishes and criticizes it can work. You know, you've seen it in the world of tennis, you know some some coaches or hopefully more in the past, and now we're really strict and we're really criticizing and in the negative motivation. And it works to a certain extent for a short period of time. But when you take all your life, which is afterwards won't be only tennis, it can you know, really uh cause some some difficulties in a way because because when you call yourself names you you you know yourselves even if you if it doesn't matter if you consciously know it or realize it or want it. It takes away your inner strength. It takes away your self confidence, it takes away your value and so on. So even if it's like a joke and it's funny and you know it helps us, uh, you know, fight harder, uh deep inside. In the long run, we are putting ourselves down, and you know, our self confidence and our inner strength, you know, it is diminishing. So so ideally, uh and this should be a part where where the either psychologist or a mental culture or anyone that's that's helping a play with the mind, UH, should should help them work on that. I mean it's better to to say, Okay, I'm angry, but then stop there and maybe have other possibilities how to in the first personal communication, how to get it out. But ideally we should not motivate ourselves through negative motivation, which is putting ourselves down. I mean it works to a certain extent, but you know, throughout your own life and then you want to do something else. You want to have relationships, you will have children, and you don't want to have some some wounds that that that that you you you you did to yourself. Well, but I mean, it happens. You don't punish yourself that you did it. You know, of course, it's it's okay when it happens. It happens, and it's okay. We're not robots. We're normal people. And I mean I even personally do it sometimes to myself. But I do do something I don't like, but but I tried to minimize it, or I try to use a better part or know the how how would we call that that quality or behavior? The strictness to myself. I'd rather put it uh to not eating in the evening or something like that, or to you know, I'd rather be strict to myself in the moments where it's beneficial for me and not strict that I criticize myself or I I do the criticism stores myself somewhere else, which is where it's constructive. But I don't want to know, criticize myself too much, for example, during a match where it's when, where it's controversial whether it helps or not. It might of course, and and and it's okay every once in a while, but it should not be the only way we motivate ourselves in the during the match of the court. Yeah, Danny, I feel like we could talk for hours like this, um, but I don't want to um get you going before just hearing quickly our opinion on the ladies and what we've been here discussing the last couple of days, and that is, how do you feel about this whole you know, doing press, not doing press, how to deal with the media and everything that Naomi kind of um, you know, set um two days, three days ago whenever that was what's your opinion and take on that? Like, I don't want to repeat myself. It seems to me I'm always talking about the balance in an every every other sentence, but in a way well, first of all to me, because I work in the field of mental health as a coach. I mean, I for me, it's a wonderful that the topic is on the table. So I mean I I fully respect her an acknowledge for bringing it out. But to me, uh and uh working with diverse people, not only sports, it's you know, each job and we call it professional tennis. Each job has uh, you know, things or activities we like and activities we don't like. You know, and uh and uh. And to me, as many other players said, I I see it as a part of the challenge of the job to deal with the media. We can discuss what form it should have, how it should look, but I mean, as as of today, it's something that's important, part that needs to be done because it helps the players in the whole system and so on. It's the same as in business. And of course you can open a discussion about moving things in another direction, but me personally, I prefer that it's done one on one and on a different level or another platform, just just as social media. But I mean, for me, of course we're learning. And you know I was once to any one years old and then I had my difficulties in terms of my job. But I was corporate manager back then only starting in the world I knew nothing about and there were all these people that were in there for many years, and I needed to learn how to communicate with them and how to deal with it. So I think it's it's a it's a process, and each of us as a different process, and we are trying and doing things, and uh, and it's okay, you know, we should not be harsh. We should. I think it's great it's open a discussion and uh and I think you know, there are we could talk about this for a long time, and I think all of it was almost said by now that it's great to have the debate. And I think for me personally, the mental health is important topic in general, not in sports, but we still have I mean, it's it's a free choice of each athlete. I'm choosing my job. I switched careers at some point. You choose your job, which is perhaps more difficult because it's about the talent and patient. But it's still called a should Dennis and its job and and each job has a challenges, and we can have different sort of mental health challenges that goes within it. And we should work our way and we should we should get help and we should talk about it, and I think that that part is wonderful than Thank you so so much for your time. You know how special this is for me to be able to listen to you like this on a I would say, the most professional level I could possibly ask. And uh, I just hope that this is not the last time we are talking like this, and that I know how super busy you are, that you will find the time to to join us another occasion of the Real DNA Podcast. Thank you so much for being here. Thank you so much. I hope it's helpful because to me it's so natural, so I talk about it the naturally. But I try to make it as simple as possible to to to be useful. To to first of all, to be useful because one thing is, you know, to to talk about science and theory in terms of psychology, but I think the practice in terms of our every everyday life, that's something that's that's important. So well, I'm you're all the listeners will find this very very useful. Okay, thank you so much, Danny. Hi there. I hope you have enjoyed today's episode of the Real DNA podcast. Don't forget to subscribe it on Spotify, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts from. H