A bonus episode of our new segment, Girl Talk. We have three (!!) special guests on to talk life transitions, five year plans and all the goings on of life for us at the moment.
Hello, and welcome back to the Psychology of Your Twenties, the podcast where we talk through some of the big changes and transitions about twenties and what they mean for our psychology. Eggs, just fat and everyone. So we're going to take a quick five minute break. Hello, and welcome back to the podcast. Thanks for tuning in. We have a very special episode today. It's the first ever episode of girl Talk because we have three very special guests. Hello. Everyone, hiy goot and talk. Yeah. I brought on some three special guests, some close friends of mine. We'll be like to do a little mini introduction before we get into the Girl Talk. Aaron, I'm looking at you. I go first, of course you do. Hello. My name is Eric. I've been on the podcast before. What was the episode that you did? I did the nine to five episode a long time ago. Yeah, it was one of our first episode. A guy guys. Wow, you know it's almost a year of the podcast, coming up to a year. Really, what d on the fifth of June? So I do expect first birthday presents? I don't think about it. We have a combined birthday party for me and the podcast. That sounds so sad. No, I love it. I love it so sad. I don't want to have a birthday this year, so we'll make about the podcast instead. So I listened to it so much that I'm practically I'm an investor. Eric. Okay, wait for the frequent listeners of the podcast, Aaron does actually receive quite a few shout outs. I do I do so nationally. Here in the Flesh and Aaron aside, we have another friend of the podcast, another friend of the show. Here, Meg. My name's Meg, I have Meg. It's Meg. I have featured on the pod us. It was with Maddie about a Harvard Oxford Sorry, wrong answer. You were even on the episode? Yeah, it was a while though, it's probably nine months ago. I'd before lockdown in Cambra. Yeah anyway, Um, yeah, my name is Big and we all gathered at the coast today. Thank you Meg, Thank you, and our final guest of this very special episode of Girls Talk. Hi. I'm e J e J a podcast burgeon surgeon. Yeah, past time, very excited to break break the seals, sorry, break the seal. Pop the cherry, Pop the cherry. That's it, pop the cherry. EJ also hasn't quite realized that on the podcast. Do you actually have to sit kind of sorry, sorry, it's totally fine. Bring it closer to J Well, I was trying to do that. We have already dropped the mic in the bowl of the chips. I was thinking of a stick to ye oh yeah, take the phone. Yeah, we used to take the phone to a stick. Yes, okay, we'll get to that. Revolutionary like a selfie stick. But for the podcast, Yeah, did that come to mind? Because we have the fire going, I felt like a microphone just I also thought of a kindling steacaster. Yeah, we could actually probably do that. So welcome EJ. First time, let's talk of EJ. We'll welcome thanks everyone. Thanks, Are you excited? Yeah, I'm Kane. A little buzz but I'm Kane, Yeah, a little buzz. I think, why do you look at me? That that laughing audio right there? Give it away? We were our podcast today. I would like you to picture us sweating because we have a beautiful fire created by Gemma. Hey, I did a really good job. Because of that, we are sweating and we have windows open, we have doors open, bathes bathes on. Make went a little bit noody before I had to get changed into a really sexy underwear and it was really cute. I was, I was admiring it. We're not advertising any brands. It just has a unicorn in a chess plate, he does, and it was gorgeous. Um, so we got the fire going. EJ. Maybe you can tell the listeners why why are we all gathered here today? We all live in different cities, so what has made it that we're all here today. We really needed a break, We really needed a vacation, so we all came together and that's why we're at the coast. So we're at the coast. Yeah, which coast? Which near Drivers Bay? Yes? Yeah? Milton, Milton, yeah, yeah, yeah? And how did this? Someone didn't put their phone on side? Didn't someone on this side? Give me ship? Have my friend silent? And okay for context again, EJ lost her phone about five times today. What are these times? She left her phone on top of the car in aation and the car was moving. Yeah. So basically we all needed a break and we decided that we should go to the coast. Yeah. Yeah, So me and EJ drove down from Sydney. Heron drove from Canberra. We'll get to that. And Meg, where did you drive from from Swift's Creek, Swift's Creek in Victoria, Swift, Yes, exactly, thank you. Not Swiss as in the country cheese, Swiss army. No, yeah, no, Yes, drove from there yesterday and we all got here and we've had a really lovely day. Will we say, the most beautiful weather, most beautiful weather we hadn't We did have an incident with the car. Oh yes, would anyone like to explain what happened there? Aaron? Aaron, what happened with my car? And of course it was I was gonna wait just quickly, it was my It was my car because I did not take care of my Carum. Jemma had not pumped her ties up since December. We are now in my two months, six months, dear listener. Um and yes, so the ties were not doing well. Hopefully they're not punctured. I don't think they're punctured. Think you pumped them up with this random guy. We were trying to go to this op shop and it was closed fatally unfortunately, and we were in this what would you describe it as, EJ like the two dollars stop were like, oh my god, we had temporary tattoos. Podcast after podcast, I think maybe we should finished this guys. Aaron almost literally ran, I do I want to podcast? Okay, wait wait, so we basically wait wait wait, wait, so we let's just do a little bit of a refresh. Yet we went. We tried to go to this Viney's. We ended up going there it was closed. So we went to this two dollars shop and EJ has brought temporary tattoos. Aaron literally just leaped out of her seat then to go and do them so cute. They are really cute. But we're also literally recording right now. Can be a fun side activity, but the podcast. Listen to play along and let's just have to listen to us to go to a two dollars tattoo Touch your store, go to a two dollars shop, find some really cute temporary tattoos, and buy a sweater and made by the lady who runs the shop because she's a really good crochet artist. Yeah. Well so basically this lady was really nice and she was she like, can crochet all these sweaters? And this is a real sidebar. But we were in the store and then this random guy came up to me. It was like, how would he was just what did he say, do you remember, excuse me, your left hand tires? No, no, he said left hand and then he said, oh, I meant the right hand tires a bit flat. And then Jemma went out to inspect it. I did go out and I had like a weird like crochet but king top on. But the lady was like, you should try it on. And then this man came in was like your tires deflated and I was like, oh, oh god, but he was like, your tires, it looks like you should get that checked out. And we were like in the middle of nowhere, like this is like some tiny town wall Kalala Bay. Everyone, We're in Kalala Bay. And it was literally like Vinnie's Chicken shop. There was then yes, and then there was this weird what did you for tearing over? Anyway? Sorry sidetracked. Aaron is not being great. Karen. I want to hear about makes turn over experience. Yeah, I've told you about it. Didn't realize that was where it was. Well, I don't think we're going to This is an authentic episode, and we're being highly authentic here. It's called girl Talk Bad. What girls do we talk? Aaron we pike own the house and we get temporary tattoos a buff the fly. I mean, Aaron is like really on a scat moment right here. She's like, you cannot keep focusing. I've had the flu all weekend, by the way, sweating because I don't know what supply or don't know where it's It's really horrid. So maybe we should move on to this question that we had. How are we all doing? Aaron, I think I've just I've done a good job of explaining how I'm going. I've got the flu. I've got the terrible camera flu um and it wants to be Somebody said, oh, there's like this name for it. That's somebody used the other day, super super flu. It was the one's I'm not swine flu. It was like this horrible like it was a flu sentence that was like, it's like, um, anyway, I have the flu, and I'm being a little baby about it. I'm not coping very well, but I also haven't been feeling very well. It's worse than COVID. So yeah, wait, I thought I'm a joke. Yeah, swine flu, swine flu walk so coronavirus could run. God, it's so funny. I mean, I don't know well, covid humor is still unfortunately. Sorry, We've walked to basically each I had to put We're in this little cabin and I said, we put this fire on and it's so hot. It's right where we're sitting, like we're sitting very close burning, it's very warm. It really fucking hot. Note and pool. Oh no, no other way there you go. Megan's broken the fireplace and we're our airbnb host. Is this like old lady. She's my nose wide open. Oh hi um, but she's like this old grandma, and she's really really sweet. She's really really sweet. House is like three hundred meters from where we are sitting. Yeah, it's quite close. And their chicken. There's there's a brewster sexually something. Every single fucking hen out there. I actually was so high today. Don't even tell me how am I going not very well. Has been traumatized because we have these basically this airbnb, there are all these chickens. There are all these chickens. There are all these chickens that are running around, and there's one free range, very cute, but like try and eat our pancakes and then there's this one rooster and it's like fully going at it with all waking your heart, waking yoursel up. Firstly, it was just scutting crow. Yeah. Oh and yeah, what was that? Yeah? That was great? So ej is slightly trauma cz Meg, how are you going? Um, I'm actually doing great. I am a bit I think, not low, but a bit tired. I think maybe I did get the flu shot yesterday or I could you be just tired from the driving. But apart from that, I'm feeling there six hours to be here with us, but I'm here now for five days. Anyway, you wait for five days. Oh you're coming back to camera? Yeah? And how are you, Jenna? I'm doing great, guys, I'm fine. I've been better, I've been worse. I think I'm a bit. I've had a few glasses of wine. Do I really want to divulge my all my secrets? That's what not. But we did make Meg explain how dogs are set on the podcast. People need to know. Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. People buy puppies, so they've got to know how it's been conceived. I thought that was I think that's absolutely larous. But I think I'm doing I'm doing okay. I'm like a bit lonely, bit sad at the moment with us, So I'm feeling really if your head programs about any So, I'm doing well. Aaron's doing okay. She's sick. EJ has been traumatized by the chicken's humming sex. Meg is good factory factory, a bit tired because she got the flu shot. Um. Yeah, I feel like that's a great introduction. So the plan, the plan with these chit Chat episodes, this one being the first, is a much more unstructured kind of conversation amongst friends. What do we think about this? Aaron? Aaron, any ideas? Meg? How do you feel? I don't mind it, but I just think they do need a little bit of structure otherwise it's drags on. Yeah, yeah, we have a structure. Yeah, so small tangent um that they always not have already been recorded and lost to the bowels of time. I had to to take a quick break because each to go out, I'm fun is the fact that jack by partner doesn't like chit Chat podcast and you don't need the JEM. I know this is a fact because I've tried to get you to listen to them before now and you get so bored of the conversation he skipped. Um, so he doesn't like it because, um, he wants to be a part of the conversation. So he doesn't like the fact that he's listening to their conversation. He's not part of it, and he doesn't know the people who are talking. So I find the podcast really fun to listen to when I know the people that are chit chatting, because like, I know their story, I don't know their background. But um so if you don't know us, if you don't know us, there's probably another entertaining but to solve that pretty funny. Um, we're pretty funny. And also it's going to be structured, so we will be answering interesting questions about life. It will not just be us rambling. Because I listened to a terrible one the other days, just like no, no yours, Oh my god, I would never say such a thing about Psychology of your twenties. Oh that's my podcast. That was fault. Um No, because I as you know, a debout listener. Um, but I listened. Yeah, I listened to one the other day and people just talking about like their weekends and how they felt about like some girl that they knew, and I was like, can we not do this? Please? How do we feel about j? But I love it good? You love it interesting. I listened to a twenty minute podcast about why they didn't like Zara, and I that's interesting because that's like actually something of salt. Because no, because it was about like like midlife crisis. And then they spent twenty minutes talking about going into Zara and how they didn't like how it looked like, oh my god, I really enjoyed that. I thought you talk about um. The recent goes about saying podcasts, God, yeah, yeah. I literally shout out not to show. I don't excuse me anyway, promote other podcasts on my podcast? Do not go and watch listen to that podcast We're not was it again? The podcast name? It goes about so why would you? I thought it was a genuine question of the podcast failed and chanled, go fine outside and go sit outside and m something fut Then, guys, I feel like we got everyone's giving me ship. We just we just ate sausages. So no, it's not smelling very good. You know what, This episode is more for us, and it's more for us being able to look back in the future in five years time in this cabin and back into this cabin with the fucking hot fireplace when you have a million. And also there's so the fireplace, the the cock, the big old roost stubbs that abuses the hands and makes fats and eja. But we can think back on it. So I guess that's alright. So five years time. It's a bit of a chop. I just thought we could have a question before we got to the five years Okay, well, what are you what are you think going to be in two years time? That years we'll stick to the stick to the question. So five years time, what do you think we're going to be in five years time? We're having an amazing weekend. Do you think we're going to be doing this in five years? Where are we going to be individually or as a group? Individually? Oh okay, So I had like a whole ten year plan at UNI. I knew exactly where I was going to be at like thirty two, and then I had a five year plan. I think it's still in the goo. It's still like obviously it really changed because I graduated in twenty twenty and I wanted to like travel for a year after UNI, but like obviously I didn't because of COVID, so I've ended up jumping into my career. You know. So I've kind of got this idea of doing two and a half years of just like working, earning money, and then I'm going to drop everything and move to Ireland and then become a bartender. And like I was telling you guys today, and I just want to travel learn a language. And there's like this it's like Irish, yeah, and I just want to do that for like two and a half years. Gaelic Irish is a language, but they say Gaelic. I think the language is Gaelic. I want to learn Gaelic. I didn't anticipate and actually, but I was also thinking of maybe going into like Spain and teaching English like three months or something. That's a good idea. I just want to do something, you know. It's I thought that was Welsh. I think there's Scottish Gaelic an Irish girl, Okay, well maybe you just learned the language that is native to the Irish people. Yeah, and it could be Gaelic and it could be Welsh. We don't know Welsh it could be irish. Yeah, it just your plan sounds very beautiful. That's not on the mind of Wow. No, I'm like very like I've loved thinking about my job and getting money and thinking about where I want to go. But I'm also like, I feel like there's an element to me that hasn't been fulfilled because of COVID, and so I'm very content with just separating my professional career and my life, and especially when I'm younger in my twenties, I'm going to like create that future FOREI So like, I really I'm happy where I am, my job, I'm happy with all that, but like I'm ready to kind of just say goodbye and then go overseas meet more people. You know. Yeah, you know that's like when do you think that's going to happen in the next two years? Yeah, one hundred percent. I'm like aiming for like September next year to be like mood overseas. Yeah, I mean it might not happen, yeah, So like but like manifesting it, I hope I would. Like I had a lot of bills recently though, so my savings are going you can always say you can always save, yeah, exactly. It's a very romantic view. But I've always I'm very optimistical and very like, yeah, I'm ready to do it. You know they said twenty twenty three, didn't they Actually they said twenty twenty three was the time international that kind of travel would happen again. Normal. Yeah, in quote marks normalized, like we're still internactually traveling, but it's like still bad. Were you guys going to Bali? What Europe I'm going to? Yeah, I think I'm going to be Banks going thanks going to Bali with Usville, he's pretty much international. Yeah, honestly, Swift Creek, Yes, takes just as much time to drive to Innisvale. I was gonna say, it's probably similar. Probably I'm more expensive expensive, doesn't even know why you feel? How much much cheaper? Yeah, yeah, it's more. But this is like Gamma drove like twelve hours to Queensland and then the flights to Brisbane was like eighty dollars, but the flights to Prisban from Sydney, the flights Rismon really cheaper from Canada. It's the journey, it's not the destination. And well, okay, my journey involved me getting a hidden run. So remember when someone knocks my window, off my my mirror, off my car. I think that's an absolutely magical joy. Hope we can visit you to speak in my head. In my head, this is very like not to put dreams onto you guys, but in my head, Jab is gonna be in the UK doing her master's. Um, she's gonna be Mag's gonna be doing a tour around Europe, and then Aaron's gonna be living in life with you. Yeah, exactly, We're gonna bear it. We will be roommates above a bar in Ireland. Oh, your boyfriend Jack and Josh? Should they? I mean if they want to come? And I like Jack definitely would. I'm speaking well, I think justin Josh. I hope if you're listening to this, you're probably not. But you guys are going to become best friends. We're planning it. Yeah, it's part of the five year plans. This is this is public now, this is part of the five year plans. Best friends and we are going to go and live in a what do we want? Like a three bedroom house? Three bedroom and I can yeah, because we're going to get and can't visit us and then we can like go and do whatever. Jobbies we do in Ireland, exactly Island. I'd love to live in Ireland. Okay, So basically Aaron has jumped on the it's a great dream. We do great. J and I previously any very warm. EJ and I have previously lived together, just to the listener knows, so we know what each other's living style is. Like, we're very compatible housemates. I would say, EJ, how do you feel she doesn't like my smoothies in the morning? Oh God, actually, yeah, that's true, don't. I don't. I don't do smoothies in the morning because I'm worried I'm gonna wake up the boys. Because I go to my houseman's like, oh mag make just found a chip, let's smooth that away. But I go to bed at like eleven, and then my cup at like six or seven. That's what J used to do. And then she used to put the smoothie blender on it six am, and I would be very very upset. I knew, although I'm already not a morning person. Oh my god. This morning we all went to the beach and Aaron stayed in bed. Sorry, and then she was like, you guys were talking all more against one as well, and she had ear ear plugs in. I still hear you. It was ridiculous. That sounds like a new problem. It does, Actually it was will have a lovely chart. We were having cuddles. Oh and you never give us cuddles because I've got the flow. I don't care if luenza a babe. So Meg, what is your five year plan? Aaron has already jumped on the bands. You don't get any more. Say my dreams are reduced to Ja's dream is nothing else, So what's your FAMI plan? Look? To be honest, I don't really know what I'm doing at the moment. You know, I don't have a certain thing I want to do. But um, I'm saying that travel is definitely something I've missed out on too, like EJ said, so definitely going overseas, living over there or traveling both for a bit. Definitely Asia, like Central Asia stands to BALI yes, which is not what I'm saying just by Central Asia No no, but maybe yes. And then three month plan because you yes, I am finishing my job in two weeks in Swiss Cream and I'm going up to Queensland to do some other seasonal work which is yet to be decided TBA and what I'm doing, but it'll probably we outdoor work, so yeah, picking, yeah, something like that. Yes, that's exciting. It's you have a change from day. I will visit your Vegas. You will visit my hometown. Don't visit Brisbane. Brisbane's not worth going to. Don't see again, It's truly not really worth people like visiting Brisbane as tourists. I'm sorry, my hometown is beautiful. You've been Brisbane. Corumban is beautiful. Don't go to Brisbane, to crumb I will small town baby anyhow. But in five years time, where are you living? Meg? Probably overseas. I might be close to island now, but definitely overseas. Probably. I want to go to Canada next year maybe, yeah, says or doing something maybe a bit outdoorsy or with your hands one not sure. Yeah, you seasonal fire fighting in Canada potentially, but next year, oh not season five fighting. Well you can do season five fighting. You can do tree planting. But it's like it's a really interesting but Canada do they pay you? Does Canada pay you to plant trees? Yeah? But it's generation one of the most work. Like, it's it's a really interesting job because it pays really well and you like it's outdoors and you kind of go and living like a little like for like months at a time. But it's actually really really really hard because you get paid per tree. That's like Australia, So how much do you get per tree? Like twenty cents? Yeah, so you got to plant a lot. But once you get going, once you get going, in my head for some giant if I can plant a tree and like watch these Like I went through a phase when I was living in countera exchange where I was like, I'm gonna coome a tree plant because I met this person who was like, yeah, I was a tree plant. I'm going back. And but I watch these YouTube blogs and like people get like your body like does not recover, but the shorter you are the better because you're yeah, yeah, that's very true. But if you're a midge, it's perfect for you because it okay, think about this. You've got to carry like all the stuff you need for a tree planting so that you've got like and then like you need water and then they just dump you in the middle of a paddic all day and then you just got like dig holes and plant trees all day and you do nothing else, and do they go around and count trees that you point out, they count many trees are in your backpack? Yeah yeah, But then like I saw these things are people who like big ding trees and they hit like a horned stairs and then they get like bitten on their face. But like all these like bees, that's like a fucking hungry game. And then bears. Yeah this sounds terrible, Yeah, but they can pay really well because like you work for like three months in you and like quite a signficant amout of money, and you make friends and like quite a lot of young people do it get eaten by a bear? Well, I didn't think a blog of somebody getting in by bar, but it's suddenly a hazard aaron. So that's your five year ago absolutely to be eaten by a bear. And Canada planting pine trees, yes, well, and it's an interesting thing because I think, no, just quickly, I think they plant the trees for forest trees. So they plant them, so they grow and then they calm them down again. So it's not even like fun tree regeneration, like it's like native and stuff. Yeah, that's about in Australia too, So it's commercial. It's commercial. Yeah, it's commercial. That sounds and you think that a machine could do it in this day and age. They so to be rough and I think, I like helicopter drop. But think about this because the tree, it would plant it in the front and then it would probably run it over. Just think about so the tree. Think about a machine and think about like, no, how do you think they plant crops? I don't know with seeds, it's seeds with the back. Oh plant about the fun I was like, why would you do that because even gonna run over the trees. I actually not work with my hands. It's very obvious. So I do not have a working woman's job. I'm like that working woman's job. Yeah, I'm just a little office bitch, a little corporate. Yeah. So your five year plan is involving trouble well theoretically, but I like to pride myself and the fact that I don't have a five year plan. No. I was literally about to pay this like I was like, I was like, I talk a lot about having plans, but like, especially with what COVID's taught me, it's like good to not have a plan. It's good to have this like optimism, you know. Yeah, yeah, I think I'm the same, although I'm going to be honest, I have a pretty pretty intense five year plan. Yeah, I think five years. Like I'm somebody in general just quickly, Yeah, because I feel quite stronger about this topic. That's what we want on the podcast. I'm somebody who like I never made goals ever, Like even when I was at school and they're like, You've got to make a goal, I was like, I don't want to make a goal because it's just going to lead to disappointment and less so because of fear of failure. I never wanted to did you ever have like sorry to go off, but did you find academic validation? Like did you ever like in high school, like get an assignment and you're like, I want top grade? Yeah, of course, is that not similar? It's a goal a goal, but like I would never make a goal by myself, Like I would never do a goal myself. I'd just be like, oh, I'm gonna get the signment and I'm going to do well. This signment was already set. Yeah. Yeah, So it's like somebody said to me, if society told you life goals are more abstract life. There's multiple paths as well. Like a school signment you don't have multiple paths, but life you have many multiple paths and what you can pick and there's like an intense amount of beariables and it's very scary, and so I like beautiful. This is true. He does it beautiful gods. Um. But yeah, So I don't make goals because I don't like goals and they make me stressed. Fair enough, Yeah, I think there can be a healthy balance in it. This is very true. Anyway, what's your one you've got. I'm enjoying this. Um. Well, yeah, because you've got the opposite of what Aaron is. Oh yeah, I just think it's quite restrictive as well, because I think if you make it, it's restrictive. It's just like because I am goals are no no, but I mean that, like my goals are just goals and my life is created around them. Yeah, it's good to have a direction at us. Well, it's just like I want to be Okay, it's just like my goals are a lot more. I think my goals are a lot more. They're not like I need to be living in a house with my partner and three children. Yeah, I would like a dog. Yeah, It's it's more like I know that in two years I want to be doing my masters. Yeah, because I think a lot of people make those goals that you were talking about in the first instance, it's like I need a house and pets and a child and like. And I think that's why a lot of people or like, for example, when they can't have kids, I get really disappointed because their whole life has been about this one goal of filling this one role. Yeah, whereas mine is like also it's too actually could go out about Yeah, Whereas my goal is like I know that in two years I want to be in London studying masters. Yeah. That's not a constrictive goal, totally, totally. Yeah, that's like I want to be. I know, I want to be overseas next year, like I did say septembook, but like I know in the foreseeable future, I would love to be overseas. Whyever that is? You know, it's a very interesting thing. Yeah. See, I think because I've had so many things happen in life that have happened purely by chance, and I think as well propelled somewhat by COVID, where I made a big life plan. I was like, so ready to do all these things after exchange and go traveling, and then none of that could happen. And I was like, well, that's the last time I ever make a goal because that didn't happen, and it was so disappointing and very upsetting and like a huge waste of energy even getting myself to that point only to have the hold from underneath me. I think it's like, I think it's good to have that realistic perspective of it, but I also I cann't see where jama is coming from. I really can be such a happy balance between and I think that a lot of it has to do with like as well. My general life mindset is a very negative one. Yes, we've talked about this, but also I don't have a partner. I don't have anything tying me anywhere. Yeah, but like I have a partner and I and he is extremely aware of like my boundaries in the sense where I have gone into that and has been like, yeah, I want to be overseas, I want to be doing this, and these are things I want to achieve in my life. Do you think long distance helps with that? I think so I think he's really been open minded to my perspective because I also think I don't want him to be restricted in his goal setting. I don't want his life to just revolve around me. So in my head, I'm like, I want to be overseas with consideration that maybe he wants to join me, but if he doesn't want me, doesn't want to, we can work through that, you know what I mean. I honestly, it's been interesting because I've been having like a real like I love. The thing is, I haven't really met Meg's partner. Ah, but I've met but wait, wait wait, I've met Jack. Obviously, I've met Aaron's partner. I know I know Aaron and EJ's partner's quite well, I would say, And I feel like and all of my friends at the moment have boyfriends and partners. But that's one thing. And I've been feeling like kind of sad about it because obviously I went through a break up at the start of the year. It like completely destroyed me. We've talked about it a lot, but maybe moving onwards fuck him, but um, but the thing is, it's like I have been like kind of in a weird headspace about it recently, and then I'm like, actually, there are some pretty amazing upsides to it. For example, if tomorrow I decided, oh, like I want to move to London, Yeah, you can do that. I could literally do it. Yeah, And also my work is so great that I could do it as well, like I should beautifully they sing conversation with Jack. I could also move to Toronto. Sorry, choice of I'm not going to move to Toronto. Yeah, don't you know how my seasonal depression be. I had a really interesting conversation with Jack the other day about this as a concept, because like, when you're with somebody, I was like, at the end of the day, you've got to prioritize yourself number one baby. So whatever you want to do, like even if that involves not having me around at the end of the day, it's about you and about your life, and don't constrain your life to suit the relationship you're in, because at the end of the day, all you have is yourself. Meg and I were talking about this we were literally an hour ago. But like, I also makes a good example, and so she's still going to Queensland and it's a partner. People always ask me exactly going exactly. It's not coming on reality. Yeah, is it hot? You know. No, I've always planned to go by myself. Yeah my plan. Yeah, good A goal a goal, and it's a goal that is useful. But back to this, I think in five years time, I would like to a I'm gonna say this, I would like to have not been in a relationship in that period. Yeah, I am pretty set on staying single with the capitalist for the next five years. I would like to have a lot of new friends. Okay, no, no, I'll just be showing myself out. But I would like Yeah, but I would like to have a continue like obviously, you guys aren't people. I'm letting God. And I'd like to live somewhere other than Australia. Although I am a big Sydney fan at the moment you just moved there, I'm obsessed with Sydney. E J can't say the same. But Meg is from is living in a pretty small country town. Yes i am. And we went to this bar yesterday. Oh yeah, what was your? What? Bar in Milton, New South Wales. Not particularly most pumping place they were, to be fair, it was different. It was a Mexican bar. Well it was a bit of a weird Australasian Okay, Australa Mexican Mexican cuisine yahud. And there was just so many people there and they kept staring at me, but they weren't. It's just because I haven't been people people. Yeah, and then I was. Then we're talking about Sydney and Canberra. Even I get very overwhelmed because there's so many people. Imagine, Okay, imagine Megan Sydney with us. You'd be pretty sure godly though, I remember when we went to Melbourne. Yes, and weren't you still living You were living in Bombala at that stage, and you coped. I came. But that might be a familiar st obviously, But I think actually you might be right, because I was. I was not okay, Melbourne. I know Melbourne because that was like the Cydeo you knew. Yeah, you're pretty familiar with it. But yeah it's Sydney. You're less for me, Yes, sweet, yeah, very very true. I feel like you would really really struggled with this. Here's the thing about Sydney though, that I've been really interested. I don't know if you feel the same, EJ. I feel so ugly, Oh my god, this is a great Yeah. No, but I feel this is no, this is no no. I can I can I agree with her. I can agree with her. There is a different there's a subculture of beauty that has quickly. It's not a subculture of beauty. It's a subculture of people with a lot of disposable income and very rich people. What are what are I using for? So there's like I don't get basic basically, I want to get live fil I hedline, so I know I was talking to I was talking to my houseman the other day about this. I don't know what it is. I'm going to blame it all on the guy I was seeing at the start of the year, absolutely destroying my self confidence no matter what, what what what? Why? Yeah? Thank you? Silence from everybody else? No, I started and it was too late. But I don't know what it is. But when I moved to Sydney, I was like, wow, I'm so ugly, but also just like my personal circumstances where I was like I'm a lovable and I was like I should get lip fillers. And then I was drunk the other night and I was telling my housemates about it and I was like what and I was going to book in an appointment and it was like five and then I was like, have you seen Okay? I googled it. I was also I'm scared of injections. I was gonna say, I, if you ever want to scare yourself out of getting lip fillers, watch the Jeffrey Star video where he gets his lip fillers removed because they were like went bad and like collagulated in his lips and he films everything and they filmed okay, so he got these like really bad. This is when, okay, I gotta stop from the beginning, Jeffrey Star, oh um, as people know, it's very problematic. I want to assure you that I no longer watch jefferis are but if you did, who cares well. I don't want to get canceled. Cancel counsel, not canceled. That's our phrase on the show. Counsel not canceled U. But jeffreyest I was really problematic. But basically he filled his um lip filler like removal, so he had like plastic surgery, but he got it like done back in the day when they weren't really like a big mainstream thing and they just did them really really wrong, and they like put something in it that got like stuck in his lips. So he had like a he had like lumps in his lip. Was it plastic? It was like, yeah, some kind of plastic didn't like dissolve, and then he had to get them like professionally removed, and like he filmed the whole process of getting removed. And I was like, I just like I can't, I cannot think of anything worse. I'd still get it. You should watch it. I know. I watched it at like fourteen, and I got like mentally scarred by it. So yeah, recommendation if anybody's on the fence, go watch that video. I don't even know what it's called. What do you think about it? I've thought about it. We're in Bambaala, my old housemate. We were talking about it quite seriously, yeah, about getting it. But then I was pretty like for it. But then I didn't realize you have to get them every like two years, so that's last that's a lot of money every two years. Maybe by the time, you know, by the time I went twenty four, we won't kill Well that's no, no, that's the thing. Well saying, I was like I want to get them now because I want the I'm in my toyally twenties. That's when you look the best. Surely, I just want to look really hot. I think I get worried that you get used to the look of them and then you get like stuck in the addictive loop of spending money on them. Well that's been my eyebrows. Yeah, so it just quickly EJ. But I got my eyebrows because I've been on like this whole like weird self love, self confidence journey, and I started getting my eyebrows done and like what is it called tinged? Tint tint tinted and done, and now I'm addicted, addicted on getting my eyelashes and my I browsed into which I never thought I would be that person. Yeah, that that person is really a thing. Yeah, but J what do you think? So I have this like really back and forth relationship about like cosmetic surgery where it was like so similarly with like like Jama, I had this experience with an ax he he pointed out that I had really thin, a thin upper lips. Yeah, and I got really like insecure about it. I was quite young. I was just turned eighteen, sort of thing and what was his name just was no cool anyway, I was quiet um and I was quite like I became very like innately aware of it. And it was something like I would like take photos and I'm like, I'm up on the lip, and I would consider like getting like lip fillers, but I'd always see like people on television or people in real life and it just either they had overdone it all this kind of stuff that then I started thinking about it, like if you feel beautiful and you feel content with your decision and confident your decision, like go ahead, but as long as you're aware of like the health precautions. Yeah, But then you start to think, sorry to get really mad at here. But it's like you start thinking about like the cosmetic culture, and you start thinking a plastic like social culture. Is it done for men exactly? White security exactly? And it's like a white where does the money go? Exactly? And you think, like what is beauty? It's like, especially in Western culture, it is like post colonial beauty of like blue eyes, blonde hair. It's like, yeah, you know what I mean. It's people aren't going to remember you, like at your funeral, for yah, it feels you feel like, how can you were? Yeah, but I also for me, so I'm interested in getting so I think the lip feeler thing and the cheek feels because that's the thing I'm concerned. Yeah, for yourself. But you guys, I think you guys all know, like the last three months have been hard because I just felt so low because this person like completely just doing it for I'm not doing it to like impress them. I'm not doing it to feel more attracted. The only reason I'm doing it is because I'm like, if I had this done, yeah, I would actually feel confident enough to be myself. Yeah, because I feel like my external would match my internal. Yeah. But I don't know. I don't know what That's really interesting though, because sometimes I think that that's a bit like the whole concept of like if I buy this dress, I will finally be satisfied and never want a black dress that is short and I can wear out again. It's like this culture of wanting. There's a culture. There's a really Ruby Sparks has a really good book about this. Um, I can't remember what the book's called, yeah, but it's blue. It's got a blue cover, and it's about this concept where like when she was like in the Pits of Despair, basically, um, I said here Colin favorite the podcast, joking because this podcast is a favorite, The Pits of Despair. She went through a phase where she was like, if I get six cushions that are perfect for the couch, I will finally be good. I will finally be happy. And she spent months searching for these perfect cushions for a couch that fitted the esthetic of a whole whole house, and it was going to be perfect, and like she was like, yeah, that, like it was never gonna happen because as soon as you get those cushions, you want more. But it's this concept where she was like addicted to like finding this thing, and it's actually like it's like a psychological thing, obviously because my execs a little bit different, but it's a psychological thing. There's like hunter and gathering instinct, which is why like when we go shopping, we feel really good for like ten seconds, and then like two weeks later we're like, oh, I forgot to baul that. Yeah, it actually activates the like part of your brain that has the hunter gather a complex. It's like when I gather things for my tribe, my tribe will love me. But I think for me personally, it's like and I really do see that. I think that, like right, and I would say, you know pretty well, I have a very addictive personality. Goes without saying, but I know that's why I think that it's like for me right now, I'm like, okay, if I which it's literally plastic surgery, yeah, but it just shows how like deeply I think it's like much more psychological. Yeah, I'm so injured psychologically by this relationship. And I'm like, I if I just physically changed my appearance so this person couldn't recognize me anymore until I could feel like myself so I could feel physically attractive. If I fundamentally changed some aspect of how I looked, I finally feel like I am not like beholden to how this person saw me. Yeah, which is why um self acceptance this thing, like because like I feel like, you know, like obviously like we're not the same person, but like I feel like I could relate to a level with the experience about like lips and stuff with Jamma, Like I've had this whole thing. It's like I've thought about it. I haven't gone ahead with it because I know where I'm like, where I'm standing from is it a place to please them and to please this like male gaze. But then there is the other end of it. And sorry to bring this up again, but I really want to get my hair lined tattooed. But that is like for me, but I know that to me, you know, I'm not dating, Like there's no one one I'm trying to impress. I'm not trying to get laid. I'm not trying to date. I literally just feel like it would just like allow me to be more like myself. Isn't it so interesting though that women are at this stage where it's like to feel like myself I fundamentally have to spend a lot of money on changing. Yeah, and also but also nothing with my past. Just support me no matter what, totally. And I also think that at the end of the day, like no shame, like go get whatever you want done, go for it. Why did you want to get them make Well, I just didn't like my lips, so I was like, oh, I just you know, and probably because I've seen like big lips and like oh that you know that looks nice? Yeah? Yeah, but like you know, but yeah it is you know, you say, yeah, I'm like, oh that you know, this is that the ideal of beauty or about you know, not really the models that just like people, you know. Yeah, it's like the Kardashians plucked what they wanted from like different cultures, different cultures around the world, and then made that mainstream and made that consumable. And now that's like what we all all expected to look like because women obviously all have to look the same way, yes, according to whatever trends are currently happening, because God forbeard, we are a diverse, unique, different set of people with individual thoughts, opinions and feelings with your hairline, because that's obviously be different. I fea if we really want to go that Gabby Hannah do you remember her? Yeah, she got her hairlin done. Oh my god, like years ago and I didn't even know this was youtubeer Like yeah, she's also I don't support her either anyway, Like, um no, it was just one of the things. So it's like the whole strow I like bleached my hair like home bleached it in like twenty twenty, and like if you lift up my hair you can see just like patches of like where the bleach where the bleach was, and like bolding. And I'm just very aware of it because I never wear my hair up and like high ponies anymore because like I can see it, Like I just like would love to get little tattoos on it, just like make it look fuller, you know, because I love my hair. Yeah, And it's just like I just like, would you ever shave your head? One hundred percent would love to shave my head the head I do because I'm sick. I've bleached my hair a couple of times and just stick of it and then I shave it off. Yeah, I want to get rid of it. I was thinking of dying it pink, like bleaching, dying it pink because I love pink as most rank. Okay, sorry for the listeners. She's wearing full pink right now, pink socks, pink pants, pink top, pink candies, somewhat somewhat pink candies, and a beautiful okay, a beautiful pink blush. Oh you gotta pink. Oh, oh my gosh, you gotta pink scrunching in as well anyway, but yes, because I feel my hair feels just gross I'm not happy with it, just personally. Yeah, I saw this thing that was like, when you want to change a physical part of your body, it's not that you want to change that, it's that you you want to change something psychological about yourself. You want to change probably, And so it was like when you feel the inclination to, like you shave your head or change your shave your hair, I'm not your head, change your hair color, you know, get lip fillers again. There was piercing, get a tattoo. It's because you're going through a period of change and you want your outside to represent the internal identity. I got my selfdom done in the middle of January this year. I got the piercing, I pushed up, we went swimming. But sorry, if this is not I got it done. And I got it in a period where I felt really out of control of my life and I wanted to take control. And I just did it and it's like I can. I was like, yeah, it was such a it was such a big moment for me, you know, I feel like this way. I got my um first tattoo in January this year, and it's she's quite she's not huge, but she's like quite big for a first tattoo. Oh my god, it is big for a first tattoo. Yeah, it's not. It's not the biggest, but it's she's up there. Um. And then I like a couple months later before so interestingly this was in a period of change, but also I kind of ham planning this for a while. Um, so it's a bit different, but um. And then I got the ones in my arms when I was leaving Hobart, um, and they're kind of smaller ones. I got three kind of smallish ones, including some writing. Um. And I had such interesting conversations with people boat because they were like, oh, I'm bla bla blah blah blah, and I was like, thank you so much. Preferming this because for the first time ever, I felt like I was like old enough and mature enough, I'm responsible enough to make decisions about how I wanted my body to look. And it was like, and I had some conversations with people are like I would never get a tatto of my life, oh my god, And I was like yeah, but like, I actually like didn't really have any qualms about it, because at the end of the day, it made me feel so incredibly in control of my body. I'm more in touch with my body. I'm very very deeply connected to who I am as a person and like my values. This sounds really deep, It's not really that deep, but it kind of is like my values and like who I am as a person, and like the artwork that I like at this stage in life, and like everything kind of has a certain meaning because not everybody gets tattooed with meaning, but my ones to start with with meaning because that is what I want. And it like really really kind of made me feel in control of my body in a way which I do not always feel. And now when I look at my body, I'm like, oh, I got to do that, Like it's mine, this is mine, Like this is a decision I made because I can do things for myself. Yeah, and I trust myself as well. Like when you got your tattoo, did you feel that way? Um? I got on my eighteen? Was it that deep? Meg? Tell us? Now, I went with my friend. I just turned out in on the day and your your mountain tattoo? Yeah? Yeah, And I just went with my friend. She was going to get a be but it was too big and we just rang up the local tattoo Polor in Victoria, like we're living, and I was like, oh, I'll just get that little mountain and then it cost me bucks and bus Yeah, whoa do you know my twenty very well? So if there's anyone still listening, I have a tattoo dedicated to Taylor Swift and that costs me one hundred and six dollars my hundred and sixty. And you know how small it is, right? Yeah? Where was it? Oh? MoMA's is a local small town that is quiet. It was a really nice place though. And also, I will say this so I'm similar to Aaron and that all my tattoos have very deep and distinct meanings for the period of my life in which I got them. And it's interesting because right now I'm in this period. I'm like, there actually isn't anything that would fully represent this for me. That's a good point because that tattoo. So in all other periods of my life, I've been like, oh, yeah, if someone asked me to tattoo something in my body, I know what I would do because I know very very clearly what my values are at the moment, what my kind of guiding thought and principles of life feels like, like, you know, all my tattoos, like the ones I have on my hit, on my ribs, I have on my back, the want I have on my hip, all very like things that I really stand by. But right now I really couldn't tell you. I couldn't. I really couldn't decide how I feel about my life right now. But when I look back at the tattoos I have gotten, yeah, especially um, the one so I have on my on my right side, I have this beautiful tree and it has an eye in it. And I don't think I've told you this before, but it means independence because at the time I was really incredibly dependent on people validation. I got an out of a really quite like abusive, toxic relationship, and it was like I really needed a reminder myself as like, I'm an independent person. I can exist without the validation and the input of these people. And I look at it. I know exactly how that felt, and I know exactly why I got it, and the same with like some of my other ones as well, Like I know exactly why I got them, and they're really meaningful to me because of that. But now I'm like, I actually don't know what would really define this period of my life. I think I have a lot of art Instagrams and I follow them. That's so pretty. I want that's on me forever. Like I saw a really nice one today as well, and I was going through a page and I was like, oh my god, it's haw too. Takes fily sixty dollars. Will look at other pretty things like get but interestingly they are all at the moment, they are all women. They're all figures of women, and they all naked. Mostly the one of my backsnaked. I have a naked wood on my back with like clouds and stuff, and all the ones I see. I don't know whether it's that it makes farting, um. I don't know that it's the artists I follow, but all of over like naked women. But I think it's just like kind of obsession with like their female and the female figure. I'm like the relationship I have with that myself and how society expects women to look. And I think I love the subversion of a lot of artists I follow, where it's like, actually, we don't subscribe to the notion of like having to walk. I've only ever gotten tattooed by woman Dent and definitely definitely from my friend Sydney. Yeah, one hundred percent. I really want one, So shout out to Sydney. She's a friend of the podcast, a friend of the show, and she's a tattoo artist and she is incredibly incredibly talented and has given me a tattoo before. So she's in Melbourne. If anyone wants at Sydney Faerry an incredible incredible artists on Instagram Sydney sid Fairy. How do you spell that? S y d A R E White I R. I feel like they can listen about it, y but she's very, very talented. I really want her to give EJ one. I really want one. So we're forty four minutes in. Let's let's do one more question. Okay, what else we have? What's a question that we really want to ask? Oh goodness, this is okay. Let a question, find a reflex question. I'm going to ask us a question, question gem question, A gem question. Okay, let's do that. So if had some very deep conversations, but we're going to finish off with one final question kind of random, but what is the one song that defines your life? Right now? Oh? My God, what do you think it is? If you could pick one song that really encapsulates these guys have asked him sandwiches, now you hear that noise? What's one song that really defines your life? Right now? I've got to think, so I actually know what it is? Do you want to go to EJ? Well? No, the first song like him in my head was Hotel Room Service by people. But what we've been listening to all weekend, that's true. So I'm like very happy around my friends and feel a little love. So I'm going to say a hotel room service. Yeah, you know it really it really like capitulates or represents like this experience of having a really beautiful weekend. It is listening to really good music. Yeah, I think I have one. What is it? It's it's this song called by Disco Lines. It's just a song I'm really liking the Moment's called baby Girl. Yeah, and it's just a scattered song. It's it's just like chill techno music. It's not really much lyrics. It's just like really nice to listen to you and it's probably is that? What's what? Which? What's the vibe of the song? Is it a party? So upbeat, like yeah, yeah, pretty party song, like yeah, it's like have a good time that darrelling, Now what's going on? I would say my song is better Man by Taylor Swift because I've been just feeling really sad and really like heartbroken, and I think that song really kind of puts you in the place of experiencing that and this is someone's like you push my love away. Let it's some kind of loaded gun and that really it really makes me quite sad because I think I went through like quite a traumatic experience of like really putting myself out there and being you know, very much in love with this person and getting rejected and which is hard and it's really hard, and it's made me really sad and I've really been struggling with it recently. But when I listened to that song and like, wow, if Taylor Swift has experienced this and I'm experiencing this, everything about the world just feels a little bit better. And Aaron, what would you say? You're one song? Sorry we had a cat emergency? Oh what happens to Mary? The cat will look after is an outdoor cat? Boo outdoor cats, No outdoor cats, No outdoor cats. Bad for the environment. But we're looking after her, and she can tell when we're about to shut her in, and so we can't walk past her in the kitchen shut the back door. She's got like a little outdoor cat area that has the door that you have to shut. Um, and the cat flap doesn't shut, so you can't like shut the cart flap so anyway, so um, you have to go outside to shut the door. But if you walk past her in the kitchen, she'll run outside. So Jack and I figured out that we could walk around the back of the house to shut the door, and you can like walk this giant loop around the house in the dark. Um, this is quite a big house, and she's figured out what it sounds like when we're walking around the back to shut the door. So um, she runs away. So you can't like trap her in the house at night, which is like really really bad because cats comment flip when it gets dark. So Jack was like, um, yeah, I don't know what to do. So she escaped. So she escaped basically, but it's why she's an outdoor cat. She comes back. But it's just so annoying, like why can't you just but Aaron, what's your represents your life. So um makes was baby Girl by Disco Lines, and jas was Hotel Rooms of This by people go through Mimi. In the hotel room you can bring up friends. So I feel like it's really sad. Okay, it's like this upbeat turn. Oh, I actually have a really nice song that at the moment I'm really liking. Um. Actually, can I have two? Yes? Go for it? Okay. So my first one is something called the organ Boogom Song by Brendon Wood. That's so sad, so sad, so much joy jo me can I play? I can't play it? Um, it's joyful, It's pure joy in a song. It's fantastic and it makes me feel happy every time I hear it. So if you're if you're having a bad day, listen to the Organ Boogam Song by Brnton Wood and it is truly truly. What's the other one? Okay? The other song? The other song? Um is called to Be in Love with Yourself by be Bloyd. Okay, actually like that and it's beautiful. It's like, I don't know what ere it's from. Let's have a little on Spotify. We should listen to both of these songs. You should listen to both of these songs, because this one is really beautiful and it's just this guy singing about like and it literally just goes to be in love with yourself? Um, can I read up the lyrics for a little bit? So Aron's is a real Eron's on a real self love journey. It's really she's also on a real podcast tangent journey in which she needs to read up. No, I need to, okay, um, because I need you all to listen to the Sorry so you're gonna cut the service out. I'm not going to cut the serves out. It's gonna be fine. I'm literally googling things. It's all good. Oh, there's like not even that many lyrics out there because there's quite an old song. One of the lyrics. Okay, I'm trying to try, and we really want to know what's listen dot com load my lyrics. Um, these are absolutely not the right lyric. Okay, well happened. But it basically just goes to be in love with yourself and it's really beautiful. The lyrics made me want to cry every time because it's like sometimes it's like hard and sometimes it's easy, and he just like sings out all these things, and I think he's singing to a girl about how good it is to be lovely because he like sings girl in the song. But yeah, okay, actually that was a really that was a lot of people more beautiful than if we'd heard the lyrics. Okay, in a really really sweet way. I'm glad that you explained it that way. Yeah, well, I'd like to thank my beautiful guests. Was our last question. It would wonder Meg was trying to hurry me. Well, I would like to think of guys that's coming on. And yeah, welcome to the first episode of Girl Talks. And if you like it, subscribe, give us a rating. You know the deal, follow us on Instagram. Yeah, I hope you enjoyed it. Did you guys enjoy it? Later? You five stars? Please? I hope that you guys will have nothing left. I will I make you realized that you could write things on Spotify you can make better get on it because it was only a recent thing that you could rate stuff. So you guys got to get on it. And thank you for listening, and thank you guys for hopefully the vonn has been a slightly useful conversation because it isn't we're going to be able to listen back to this. We'll listen to it, but hopefully you the listener. I have made it to the end and have enjoyed it. I love every time you say thank you for listening to the end, because I always listen to the end. So can you listen to the end? DJ? I do. I can show you no, but it's really lovely because whenever you say that, it makes you feel really happy because it's probably just your ejcause it doesn't even listen to My mom doesn't have time to listen to my past. No, I love you, mom, but thank you so much for listening. And we'll see you guys next time.