Show and TellThis week, Mel shares some horrendous minor inconvenience curses and Monty tells us about her laundry fails. There's also text mistakes, dogs and cats, why we love Julia Morris and the pain of time blindness. Enjoy!
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Hi, Hi, it's Monty. It is Mal. This is your podcast, Joanne tell.
I was just thinking about how there are so many songs that you could go with Hello by Lionel Richie, Hello by Adele?
Oh yeah? Or do you want to take over?
No, I'm not doing that.
You don't give an artist to feedback unless they request it. So it's Mel and Monty. Hi. Everyone back by popular demand. Is Mel's random fact to kick off the podcast.
Okay, did you know that cats can get pregnant by multiple fathers at once? No, And this is why sometimes in a litter of kittens they can all like they can look so different. Oh no, way, isn't that unbelievable. Look, I'm if I go a bit deep into this, I could be wrong, so I shouldn't. But I think it has something to do with cats ovulate when they have sex. It's not like us. And sometimes there's some mechanism that's triggered where the sperm is caught up there for a certain amount of time, and they might release multiple eggs during that time as well.
Wow, I fascinating. I had a cat called PC pussy Cat. Oh no, I know, And there was always a there was a Tom cat who lived down the road. We would always hear PC squealing because she would get raped by this tom cat, like it happens a lot, because they don't there's no other animals besides dolphins. Apparently that mate for pleasure. So this poor, my poor cat who we got spade. I don't know if that's what you call it for a cat, but anyway, it would get raped all the time. And a cat's penis is a it's like a rated knife, so it's painful.
I shared that fact. You said that on a podcast once, and I googled it and I told everybody I knew for I reckon the next three weeks about that because I could not believe it. It looks like it has little spikes on it. It's the fucking sound that comes like that sound of cats squealing.
It's so awful. I also remember when I was a kid, I would have been four because I wasn't in school yet. I got two stories with this. We had like a thing underneath our stairs, like storage, I guess, but it was empty, so my sister and I would play in it, and we had a cat, and the cat ran into the storage area to have its babies and they just kept coming and coming, and you know how they eat, like the fucking placenta off them and stuff. I remember being like, this is so hectic, and then the runt of the liver came out. There's always a runt, and this runt was so mangled, like its eye was all big and every thing like that. And I just remember like being torn between going we should keep this one and this is disgusting. I can't hold it. I was like four, and then it ended up passing away. I'm sad. Yeah, that is sad.
What a core memory that is.
I know from four there's always random things like that. My other core memory is in the same cubby house. Friends came over and they had two daughters similar age to me, and we went in the cubby and for some reason I made them get naked, but I was fully closed. You were that kid. You were, oh my god, naughty naughties. We'd play naughty naughties all the time anyway, And I remember my mom coming in and then when they left, she's like, why did you why were they naked? And I remember I was.
Four.
I were just curious, so curious, always so curious.
It's important not to let that die. Curiosity. That's a really big sign of intelligence, you know, being curious.
Do you reckon?
Yeah, no, I know it is. It's one of the one of the main signs of a truly intelligent person. Curiosity.
Oh wow, well yeah, I am very curious, So they are super intelligent.
There you go. Well speaking of something not so intelligent, but I am so into Do you remember I think it was last year we did a little I'm not going to say the word segment, but it was about mining inconvenience curses. So someone who's pissed you off and you can inconvenience curse them in a way that's not going to hurt them, but just fuck with them enough to be so annoying. Oh my god, I found a whole other list of incredible ones. These are so bad. They're so bad. Okay, imagine every time you put on a pair of shoes and start walking, they make that squeaky doun everywhere. Imagine you're running late, you have to walk into somewhere like church where it's dead silent, and that it's your shoes make that.
Sweet no matter what shoes you wear, you know what, A pair of mine do that. And I went on a school tour to try and get to school, just with the principal anyway. One of them was squeaking so bad that then I just started to walk on one toe. Yes, because I'm like, I can't have this squeak is so embarrassing.
And it's like, do you acknowledge it?
No? I know you can't, because who cares? My shoes are squeaky.
Yeah, but see that's where the discomfort would come in, because I'd have to acknowledge it. One. These shoes are pretty squeaky, aren't they. These are the shoes I just bought them the other day.
Okay.
Imagine you always felt like you had a hair on your back. You know, sometimes there's like you feel like, oh god, my back'sit che.
You meant a hair in your back that you could pluck, but not just a loose hair. The itchiness that's too horrible inconvenience, that is like actual torture.
Oh no, the next one's worse. The next one is your worst. The waistband of your pants are always too tight. It doesn't matter if you eat, don't eat. Every pair of pants, they're always that little bit too tight.
No, that makes me so as I sit here now, my pants are that teeny bit too tight, and it's all I can focus on. There's nothing more uncomfortable than it's horrib tight.
It's horrible. It's also the feeling of oh feel you can feel that little bit of roll coming over. Yes, I don't like that.
Nah.
Okay, Every condiment that you use for the rest of your life spurts out that bit of water first tomato sauce. The water does it go on to your food, onto your food, and then it's food over for me. I could not eat.
I couldn't eat. That happened the other day. But with ice magic? How good is ice magic? We got Alo's like, can I get ice magic? So we've got magic.
I think it's the same.
I still really appreciate it. But if you don't shake it to start with, the oil just comes out so poor Aarlo squirted like a bucket load of oil onto his ice cream.
It's like pre com magic. Addition, that's so true, okay. Both sides of the pillow are always warm, you.
Know when you turn your pillow, refreshing freshness, especially in summer.
Every time you pull your sheets out of the dryer, they're still slightly dead.
Sometimes I risk it when mate, because if I put my sheets in the dryer, they all tumble together, even if I put it on sheet on the sheep program drives me mad. So whenever the cleaner comes she changes my bed sheets as well. And so I love it. But it's a double edged sword because I've got bucket loads of sheets to wash and then I have to hang them over. I don't have a line, so I have to hang them over the dining chairs. I hang them everywhere in the house. It makes my brain so clutted, and then I get frustrated they're taking so long that often I'll fold them damp and I feel like a bit of a rebel, like just a tiny bit. And I always am like, you're risking a pong here, You're risking frisking a palm.
Yeah, that's very reckless of you. It's funny. I've also got I'm in the same situation. I've always got sheets hanging off my staircase. I hate it always. I hate it too.
Same when people have a pool and towels go over the pool fans.
Yeah, it's annoying.
Or a balcony.
You know what else is a really great? Like I do this a lot with fitted sheets, I put them because we've all got fans in our bedrooms. I'll put the sheet, hang the sheet sort of over the door and not fans there. Yeah, and then that you know that usually drives.
I've just quick started, which is surprising after years of doing it, to hang them over doors. I'll hang them over all the boys' doors with fan. Yes.
And also dryer balls.
Oh what do you know?
Yeah, they're balls that you can buy that literally you put them in the dryer and they as the dryer is moving, they're moving and keeping it separate, so it's not bunching up.
Do you reckon it works? Yeah?
I think it does.
You all have more strength than a wet sheet, though.
But it's just the movement like it's almost well, imagine tennis. They're like tennis balls. I guess as a tennis ball. Yeah, yeah, maybe don't just in case it catches fire. Don't use tennis is.
The tennis ball. But I'm going to try that. I just cannot see how that works at all.
Yeah, well, well.
They do, so they must, but I don't know if it would work with sheets. Maybe clothes, maybe delicates.
Yeah, maybe who's putting delicates in the dryer.
Every a dryer, oh everything?
Oh no. The only things I put in the dryer are towels, socks, and undies. And even then some undies I don't put in.
Are you joking? Why?
Because I don't want them like, I like the shape they are and everything. I don't want them to you know, like stuff shrinks in the dryer.
Yeah, all my tops have shrunk. Yeah, but I don't care enough to hang them out. I know most people don't even have a dryer. Ours goes nearly twenty four to seven. I don't give a fuck. You got to pick your battles, and drying clothes is not one of my battles. So don't hassle me about the environment, because I'll use a recycled garbage bit when I am using my dryer because it's good. The washing that happens in my house is a NonStop. It's ridiculous because Odie is a four year old can't get two wears out of anything. Now boys don't because I sweat in their stuff. So I'm constantly washing. But I will dry everything everything. My BRA's not in a bag, my undies. My sister doesn't dry a single thing. She doesn't even she never turns on her dryer, so whenever she's here, I'll hang out her dresses and stuff. But I'm like, yeah, everything goes in the dryer. And sometimes I bought a new T shirt the other day, a mother T shirt. Good God, that brand's expensive.
It is so even heard of it my mother.
They do incredible jeans and they do really good like vintagey T shirts.
Yes, okay, And I was like, how much is a T shirt?
Tell me a T shirt? Was like two fifty two sixty. They're insane. But I am like, I haven't bought anything in so long and all I wear is T shirts, So I'm gonna buy one. And I bought it, and in my head, I was like, don't ever put this in the dryer. First time I washed it, whacked it in the dryer, and it's I don't know again, it's reckless. Let's blame the ADHD. No, I'm a thrill seeker.
No, you're lazy. Yeah that sorry, that's true. I'm so lazy like that. I'm so I feel like so upset for you that you ruined.
That T shirt ruined. And I handed down Odie's baby clothes when he'd finished to a friend and she said, I can tell you always every time I put them on, because they're gray when they're meant to be white.
Yeah, because you don't separate your stuff.
You never separate. Never. I feel like you don't have to separate on a cold.
Wash though, Yeah you have, of course you do.
No, what if you need something and you put a white load on and you need the colored top? No, why that's so annoying? MS differently, don't we we do? Okay, go, let's go back to your ines.
Okay. Every time you go to sneeze and then you lose it, is there nothing worse? Do you look up at the sun as a kid, always look up at the sun and the.
It will make your sneeze?
Yeah? Yes, God, every time you get into bed, you forgot if you lock the door. Oh yeah, you'd be like I.
Wouldn't do the door. The only reason we started to lock the doors is because there was a big like robbing spree going on, so we started to lock the doors. Before that, we didn't lock a door. That is I again reckless. Yeah, I mean Sam would check the most nights, but sometimes we wouldn't. I think we've locked the main door clearly, I never do it. Sam checks them every night. But like the backsliding doors, and we had a laundry door, we wouldn't lock that.
Yeah, I remember you always when we come to your place in Elstonwick. Yes, used to leave that fucking side door open all the time. If I was there early and you weren't there, you'd be like just going.
Yeah, I don't know why we do. I think I'm more trusting of humans than you. Very very extreme and unlucky thing to have your house robbed, Like the odds of you getting your house robbed a slim and so I'll just test fate.
Listen. I think that's just a lovely that's a lovely attitude for you to have.
But yeah, I know, well when that's the robbery started here and they were all teens and they were literally nearly going house to house and they wore baler clavers and they had a knife, and I'm like, okay, let's lock the doors. And then Sam's like, let's lock the doors during the day too, So I started that. I've got a bit lucky seah that too. They've eased off, they've gone to another town.
Now it's the violence. I don't want it like it's the I'd be like, take whatever the fuck you want, it's the Viact. And then how much is that going to mess your kids up?
Oh my god, that's I just said we cannot have them in our house, purely because the kids will be scarred forever. But they weren't breaking and entering. They were purely checking what houses were open. And then they were just getting the car keys and trying to take people's cars. I'm like, no one's gonna want my mas to see X And I'm good luck to you if you get into that thing.
I mean, yeah, you know you don't want you don't want your stuff to get stolen, but also you don't want to be hurt like that. Okay, you get a severely itchy asshole every thirty minutes, you know, like you just have to you have to scratch. We've all been there. We've been there.
Ross, isn't it? It is the It doesn't happen very often.
I can't know it does.
Last time I had an itchy bum but it's uncomfortable.
I think you the feeling that you get of remembering it was when you were a kid.
Yes, I would have scratched from the bum hole as well. Yeah, for sure, and you would have sniffed your fingers after time. Okay, every day a new key on your keyboard doesn't work properly and you have to press it five or six times to make it work. Imagine.
Nah, that would That's the worst of this whole list for me. I type so much and I type so fast. Yes, that would kill me.
It's like when you're on your phone and you're typing a text or something and it's not registering it properly, do you know what I mean? And sometimes there's a bit of a glitch on the keyboard. Might want to press you know, S, and it keeps doing A instead of S, and I'm like, oh, this is driving me mad.
That happens to me a lot. When I'm writing the word for it comes up as fur as in f I R like a tree.
Yes.
Also, this is something I'll ask you because I'm actually getting scared of this. I find when I'm like texting someone or even if I'm typing something out for work, I read it back and I'm like, what the fuck is this that I wrote? It's like every word is like.
Wrong, Yeah, what is happening? Yeah, That's always been me though, yeah, but don't.
You don't check. You've just got to decipher what you mean.
Yeah, you to do Sometimes I'm like, good luck deciphering that. But I do check it if I'm not really comfortable with the person. Yes, you know what I mean. But so often I'll then reread it and have to send a text with the right word in it, Like it might be a word in the middle like garden, and I'll spell that wrong, so then the next text will just come through garden.
You know what we have to do. Someone has to invent, always about the inventions, something that stops people being able to see that ellipsus of when someone's typing too much pressure on you.
I was walking along each other day. We were on our WhatsApp and I kept it open because I could see you were typing. I'm like, I won't close it because she's sending something. Took you a long time?
Though it does, I put a lot of thought into it because I always think, oh God, what to be careful with how I word things whatever. It's just okay, that's so funny.
Hey, this is so random. But the other day I was at out the waiting for a pilates class, and I was sitting out the front of a shop and there was a dog shit there, just in the middle of the doorway, a dog shit sitting there. And I was like, no one's going to go into that shop. The dogs just shit there. The owner would have seen that the dog. It was on like not grass or anything. It was on the pavement literally like on like right out front of the shop. And I'm like, that's so awful. Now that shop assistant who's going to be inside busy, he's going to wait. If somebody's gonna go up and go the dog's shit on your front like step there, you're gonna have to go and clean it. And then they would have had to clean it up. I was like, that is so rude. But it was so gross because you see dog shit in the wild, but not out the front of a like a shop door.
I know. I feel like that must have been like an unsupervised stray dog.
Well, it's not an area where stray dogs are. It definitely belonged to somebody.
But there's always somewhere that where there's a dog that's not on a leash that's warm. Yeah.
True, But remember when I went to Aubrey and I did my stinting aubry of breakfast radio, which was like my apprenticeship kind of to get into radio. And I lived out the back of Squirt and Rachelle's house in basically a shed. Squirt was a pig boner. They were sold to the earth. They were beautiful.
It sounds like wolf creak.
Yeah, it was a bit, but I just for some reason felt comfortable being at the back of somebody's house. But it literally was a shed converted with a bathroom and everything. And they had two labradors, these black labradors, the big fat things. Anyway, I am so not a dog person. Don't say to me you'll love my dog. I won't love your dog. I'm not interested in dogs at all. These dogs sensed so much that I was not interested in them, because I'd open the door and they'd run up to me and be like backup, back up, back up. Like just couldn't even pat them when I came in, and I would have to leave for work at five in the morning. Anyway, one day I opened the door and there's a big hot steamer just sitting on the mat at my front door. One of the dogs has basically turned around and done a big finger up to me like, fuck you bitch, cop this and I've I nearly applauded it. I was like, that's one way to get back at me.
Imagine you hadn't realized stepped in it.
When you're running late too, like oh.
Which is always?
Always?
Which is always?
How's the time blindness with ADHD?
You know, I listened. You should listen to this. Everyone should listen to this. But Julia Morris was just on Mark Morris.
I saw a clip. Was it good?
It was such a great podcast.
She's so she is one of my favorite humans.
She is so honest, but so she has this honesty that you relate to, but this inner sort of confidence in herself. Yes, that is so like for someone who might be challenged in she's recently she was talking about a recent ADHD diagnosis, but she taught she acknowledges the shit part of it because regardless of what everyone says, she can make your life shit in some ways. Right, But she was also like, I don't know, Like he asked her something like you able to look back and reflect and you know, be proud of yourself whatever, and she's like, yeah, I give myself a pat on the back. Constantly that crip, Yeah what alleged you should?
Yeah, so you should. Because her career was really interesting because she was a comedian, worked her ass off, then went over to the UK I think it was, and she didn't really have a career here, and it wasn't until she came back and she was older, Yeah, where she went on that singing show and I remember that singing b or whatever it was where they were partnered up with a professional singer, celebrities to get partnered up, and she was so funny on that. I remember going, you're a fucking legend. And I feel like from that her career really grew and now she's one of the hottest things on Australian TV. She's the most genuine beautiful woman that you could meet, like so gorgeous. There is no ego about her, no bullshit about her. She will not put another pair of high heels on again. That's why when you see her now, she's always got sneakers on. She'll have a beautiful dress and sneakers on. She's like, fuck that, I'm not being uncomfortable anymore. I just hear loved well.
The thing that made me think about her was she was talking about starting medication for the first time, and she said, I just wanted to live my life without that constant sense of urgency. And when she said that, I thought, God, that is so perfectly she.
Said, so perfectly said.
You feel like everything is you feel like you're being chased all the time.
And you can't decide differ from what is actually urgent and what isn't. And I need to trial medication again. I trialed it and I couldn't find the right dose and I just gave up. And I'm like, I've got to try it again because I have chronic fatigue. I'm really nervous to do it because I just don't want to feel strung out and exhausted. I just would just go to feel exhausted.
For some people, it just doesn't work, I know.
And it's just I just don't respond meant to medication that well. But I am going to give it another go because I just am sick of the business in my head. And that's right, the urgency. And like, even as we're sitting here, I'm like, as soon as we're done, I've got to go and empty the sink because there's a bit of food has accumulated in the sink and I fucking hate that. So I'm like, got to do that, got to do this, Like I have a checklist of things that I've got to do after we record. Not urgent at all, but the intensity feels like it's got to be done.
Yeah, I get that.
The time blindness for me is the biggest thing because I will be like, Okay, I've got to be here in ten minutes and the amount of things that I will try and do before that, and then I run so late, like even if it's a few minutes late, I don't like being late for people. And no, it will be like, Okay, I need a coffee before I get somewhere somewhere, and I'll have five minutes to get to the place, but I still think I can go past the coffee shop get a coffee, and then I don't enjoy the coffee because I'm so stressed that I'm running late. But for me not to get the coffee wouldn't even register.
It's so funny, you know what it's like. It's like you know people who have which I'm also a bit that weight, like really bad spatial awareness, Like if I'm driving, I find it hard to gauge, have I got enough room to get through these in between these two cars? It's like that, like you can never quite gauge how long you need for something, yes, and then you're always running late and then you look like a flake, or you don't give a shit about other people's time, or you're fucking always scattered. Yes, you know, yeah, it's yeah, and the decision is see, I don't have indecision. Oh my god, I have the impulsiveness of that when I'm like, bang, just get it done. Yeah.
Yeah, it's full, isn't it odd? Yeah? I don't know everyone's But the other day my friend started seeing a psych and he's like, everyone's a bit adhd And I said, you stop seeing him. That is so fucked up. It's so gas lighting when people say that, And it's just like, of course, there is a bucketload of us, like all of our brains are different. Of course they are, do you know what I mean. It's like it's not just everyone getting diagnosed. I get it. The people on Instagram just going this is this is this? Like that's dangerous. I get that, but so many of us are late, like diagnosed late in life. Because it was just like well, no, you're not a naughty little boy. And it's like, of course, bucket loads of us are getting diagnosed out because we know so much more about it. But I'm like, not every typical person's brain's wide the same either, Like not every neurodivergence brain like you and I ADHD, but our ADHD is very different, so different.
Yeah, I know.
So that's why it's like you go ADHD. But it's like there's so many different.
It's like different symptoms of the of the one thing. Yeah, so there might be some core pillars that you've got to check, yes, but then how they.
So different? Yeah, it's the same as autism. Like everyone thinks of autism as this line, this spectrum, and it's not And that's why everyone goes and well, not that's person's not autistic because you know they're very low on the spectrum. It's so not correct. And the way we need to think of autism is like a circle full of all different colors. And you might have some blue, some green, some pink, some yellow. Somebody else might have more blue and a bit more green, or they might have purple like you've but doesn't because you have maybe less of the colors mean that you're less autism. Stick. It's just drives me wild how little is known about neurodivergence and how people are so quick to go, oh, he's not autistic or she's not autistic.
It's because in what it's not what they think in their moment.
No, because they're not possibly visibly autistic where you can look and go, Okay, I can see that person's autistic has higher needs than somebody else. But it's also like, if you don't appear autistic, it doesn't mean that your needs don't fluctuate from minute to minute.
Yeah, that's right. It's so funny when you put it in that way when you were talk when you just gave that is analogy the word I think it is. You gave that analogy of different colors sort of in a circle or whatever. If it could just be that we're all different, neurotypical, neurodiverse, whatever, we're all different, but we somehow those colors we connect with each other and make up for each other's So maybe you and I together, You've got more blue and I've got more pink, but I compensate for your lack of lack of white. And do you know what I mean like that, Maybe what it should be is we're all working together to fit in together to make the perfect rainbow.
Yes, the perfect circle. Bravo mal instead of going, oh, you didn't have enough blue, you're not autistic, so gas lighting. Also, just to correct you, it's not neurodiverse. I know. I'm never going to get it's my bought and brought. It's so because I hate when people correct. But all of us in neuro diverse, because we're all different, not all of us in neuro divergent. That's the difference. Okay, you don't bitch. I'm going to say it wrong every time. I know it. All right, let's get out of here. Thank you so much for listening. Jeez, we cover so much shit. We have a list of things. Okay, what have you got to talk about? What have you got to talk about? We write the list, we get to one thing because we just tangent so much. But thank you for listening. Please get in touch with the Show and Tell podcast. Best place to get us on Instagram. If you want to grab a Patreon chip, go to patreon dot com. Forward slash Shontel online. We should change that to Seantel Podcasts to just brainstorming stuff that really should be done off air anyway, and they start about five dollars a month. Just helped to go with the just help run the podcast, and you get an extra party every couple of weeks anyway, not for now, Love you,
