I Said No Gifts! A comedy interview podcast with Bridger WinegarBridger's blood doesn't come close to boiling when Reggie Watts (The Late Late Show, Comedy Bang! Bang!) blindsides him with a gift. The two discuss colonoscopies, high school reunions, and bogs.
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Well, I invited you, hear, I thought I made myself perfectly clear.
But you're I.
Guess to my home. You gotta come to me empty, And I said, no, guess, your own presence is presence enough. And I already had too much stuff. So how do you dare to surbey me?
Hello, it's me Bridger. I'm back in the kitchen. It's one hundred and six degrees outside. If the air conditioning you know, starts cranking, don't let that noise startle you. Just remain calm. It's me trying to stay cool in these blazing temperatures. I need to tell you that this is a big announcement. By popular demand, Yes, by popular demand, we will be doing a live stream of the upcoming live show in Brooklyn at the Bellhouse on October thirteenth. What does this mean for you, Well, first of all, it means that I will absolutely cave under pressure. If enough people scream something at me or demand something of me, I will do it. So that's something to keep in mind in case you want to manipulate me in the future. If a mob is after me, I will definitely crumble. I'll do whatever it takes to survive and make the mob happy. What else does this mean. It means that let's say you're in Australia and you want to watch the live show and you don't have time to get on that ninety hour flight to New York. Well, you can buy the live stream and watch the live show in your Australian home on your Australian electronic.
Very easy.
The same goes for let's say you're an Omaha and you just can't be bothered to come to New York. Well again, you buy the lives and you watch it in your Omaha home.
Very simple.
Maybe you're my mom in Salt Lake City, Mom, you can get the live stream. This is a thing you can do, so it really you know, wherever you are in the world, you can watch the show via internet with this live stream, and you get it at veeps dot events. Slash I said, no gifts, that's v e e ps dot events. Slash I said, no gifts. We'll put this link into the show notes. Analis, I'm advocating for the listener right now. Will you put that in the show notes as well as a link to the tickets for the in person live show. Those tickets have been marked as going fast, which is very stressful. So if you want to see the show in person, you definitely need to jump on that asap. But all that information will be in the show notes. Or you can always go to the Instagram. You're always safe at the I said no gifts, Instagram. We provide all of this information. There is there anything else I need to say? No, you go to veeeps dot event slash. I said, no gift. I'll see you at the show or I'll feel your presence over the internet. Both are magical. But now it's up to you. You've got to go buy the live stream or get your ticket. You know, we're a team, and I need you to put in some effort, an honest effort, in order for us to feel like we're still kind of a team. So do your part and let's all enjoy the live show together. And now let's get into the podcast. Welcome to I said, no gifts. I'm Bridger Wineger. We are in the studio. We're not in the backyard. We're here and what's going on. I took two freeways here, shouldn't be on either of them. I'm not the person who's built for freeway driving. I use the restroom here at the studio, we are out of paper towels. I don't know if this is the correct channel to get that information out, but my hands were not as dry as I would have liked exiting the bathroom. So that's just a little piece of information for you and for whoever is refilling the paper towels. I think we should get into the podcast. I adore today's guest. I just think he's wonderful. It's Reggie Wants Reggie. Welcome to said no gifts, Thank you very much. It's so nice to see you. And my hands are now completely dry.
Oh that's so cool. Yeah they look dry.
Just take a peek and yeah, yeah, you're extremely dry. The skin is falling off.
Yeah, it's like, oh my gosh, I'm seeing bone. Now that's a problem.
I parch absolutely, wow, parched. How's your day going so far?
It's going. Yeah, it was pretty successful. Yeah. I got up at a decent hour.
I was supposed to feel a call about an upcoming colonoscopy.
Oh my god, my first one, first one, first one.
Oh.
Yeah, how are you feeling about that?
Well?
I feel well. I know I've got to do it.
A thing of course, there's like the fear of like, oh no, what if, like there's something wrong. But I think in general, I'm I'm kind of just I know it needs to be done, and so I have a good game face on about it. And you missed the call they they were supposed to call me and they didn't call me. Oh no, it was really weird. And then they send you a text that says like, if you have any problems, contact us, and there's no number in the text. So I'm like, what do I contact? What am I contacted?
Yeah?
Text back?
Maybe, I guess, Oh yeah, I guess I could try that. I could try that.
Do you have it scheduled?
I don't know. Actually I think that that's what the call was about. I think the call was about talking about it, right and then uh, and then scheduling it.
I think, okay, well we could I mean, we could just get it done here. We could get I can hop online. It's so true. Do you have done that?
Oh? I forgot to put this on hang glider mode?
Had glider mode? The studio is haunted.
I know, I know. Okay, Okay, it's in a hang glider.
You've got Wow.
So a colonoscopy and I mean I don't know that much about them. How long does it take?
You know, I don't know.
I have a feeling it probably takes probably like half an hour or something like that, or maybe like forty minutes, forty five minutes, I'm guessing, and they put you out completely. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you do the fall, the propo fall. Oh yeah, so take the fall. Yeah, and so yeah you propofol it and then you know it's like, hey, guys, hey, what's going on?
No, it's done? What like that vibe?
Do you like that feeling?
I've only had it once.
I had a had all of my intestines removed and then replaced with just like really absorbent material.
Tells oh, yes, we all know that. Of course that was kind of all over the news.
Yeah, telescopy, but I know I that's not true. Just so the listeners out there don't do that. No, it was for a lipoma. So it's like a like a like fatty it's like a fatty deposit like a tumor kind of but it's benign, right, It's just fatty tissue that kind of like it just like grows and like sometimes I can people get them in their forearms or like even on their head and there's just like these like kind of weird lumps in there. So I had one under my shoulder blade, like under my right shoulder blade, and it was when I would lay down on my back, I could feel like a little rolling thing and and it just felt gross and I didn't like it.
Kind of sounds nice, actually.
Well, I mean if it was even if I had one on the other side, maybe that would be better. But I didn't want to cause like spinal non alignment or everybody putting un necessary pressure.
But yeah, so I went for the profile.
But the funny thing is like the table that they put you on to operate on, it's like it looks like a torture table, I mean, because your arms are like this and they strap your arms down and then above you is all those hexagonal operation lights you know that you've seen in a million movies. Twilight Zone.
Yeah, I was like, oh my god, this is what this is like, you know.
And then I just remember joking, as I always am constantly joking up until I was out, and then when I got up, I.
Started waking up.
I was just on a gurney off to the side, and it had been like I don't know, like an hour or something like that, but I was still joking, so I acted like I was in a sleep, and then I started beatboxing, and then.
They were like looking over at me.
Oh my god. I know. I was like, I was like, isn't that weird someone wakes up and they're just beatboxing.
I don't know what I was thinking, anyways, weird experience.
Very very odd experience. It's like there's something kind of mystical about it or something to me where you just vanish from everything.
Yeah, it's well, it's just weird to have a missing It's like, you know, alien abductions, like when people talk about missing time.
Right, That's that's what it is.
Yeah, that's exactly what's It's.
Like, there's no wasn't. And the weird thing about anesthetics that I've heard that I've learned about. I had a friend who was becoming an anesdesiologist. They said they don't actually understand the mechanism why it makes people unconscious fully.
That feels like something somebody should get into.
I would, I agree, but it is a weird thing. It just works right and they're able to find tune it. But the actual mechanism. Why the brain just shut saw for at least the cognitive elements, the conscious elements shut off.
They don't fully understand.
There are things about like with dreams and stuff where we just haven't nailed it down, and it just feels like, I guess we'll never know.
Well are we supposed to know?
Yeah?
Maybe we're not supposed to know. That's the last mystery that we can have.
Yeah, let's just have one. Yeah, let's have one. Guys.
So when they when you had your shoulder operated on the you this is I just I'm curious about the mechanics of this. You lay down on your back, then do they flip you over?
Uh? Yeah, I guess they would. Yeah, I guess they would. Is so weird, Like why they.
Wouldn't start you on?
I've imagined just get like a massage table where your face is going through the little hole.
Yeah.
Interesting, Actually, good, good question. Now I'm going to contact my doctor. What were you doing with I don't yes, Like, what did you guys do? Exactly?
Like?
Uh, what she did? Actually the doctor she was very wacky. Is the first person I went to that consulted about life. One was like really dry and I just didn't like his vibe. Right, this this woman that I went to see, she was incredible, Like she was just like wacky zany and just like, nah, this will be easy, blah blah blah blah, you know, like nonchalant, was highly rated and all that stuff. And and I just like after the operation, she sent me she texted me a picture of the lipoma. Was it large? It was large? But the weird thing is like it's perfectly round. Oh yeah, it was like it was like maybe about like that man Nature's miracle. Yeah, about like that thing.
It was weird.
It's like a perfectly round like a coin, like a thick click, a thick coin.
It was weird.
What color was it?
Just white? Because it's fat. It's fatty, Yeah, it's fatty tissue. Yeah. Wow.
I wonder what they did with it. Probably gave it away a necklace or something.
Yeah, but definitely a necklace for sure. Medallion yeah, because it's too medallion looking.
Or belt buckle.
It's not quite big enough a belt buckle, so I think, yeah, medallion, right, Maybe an earring or a gauge.
Oh, an earring. Oh, a gauge would be fantastic. Once gauges come back in that will. Somebody's gonna get.
That cannot wait.
So are you prone to growing these things or was it just like a random occurrence.
I think you can just get one and then that's it. I have no idea why I surprise. It was a special little surprise, but I'm glad. I was trying to go my entire life without ever being operated on, so that was my first operation.
You haven't had your wisdom teeth out?
I have not? Okay, you well yeah you know? Yeah? Well am I I don't know, no, I mean I feel wise.
Of course, of course there's an aura.
Yeah. Absolutely, you get your wisdom teeth out, you get a little dumber.
Have your d Has your dentist said anything about them?
Yes, they're always like, well we should take out those wisdom you can get in visi line. But they're also just trying to upset.
Oh yeah, I mean, God bless the dental industry, but there is I've been to dentists before run like, oh, none of this is necessary.
No, not at all.
But they're just like, you might want to do you know what, your teethill look better if you need and we can do this proceding.
And you're like what what what?
And then then you look at the bill and you're like, you've just tacked on nine hundred dollars or more.
My friends just telling me this morning. He was earlier that Sari went to a new dentist and they said you have to have five teeth out, and he's like, okay, so and they gave him the bill it was like four thousand dollars. It's like, well, okay, I can deal with this. But then what they didn't tell him was there's the other part where like his teeth had to be replaced, which is now going to cost him seventeen thousand dollars. Well, he had already agreed to this other prize, so now he's stuck paying seventeen grand to get teeth put like fake teeth put in this.
And wow, why, I mean, it seems like you could. I guess maybe it's his fall for not reading the fine.
And I blame him. I blame him.
Well, I guess if you get your teeth out, you'd expect something to go back in there, depending on the teeth.
Right, But it feels like these teeth were in the back, So I guess I guess in my mind, I would just assume like I guess you ever.
Meet him that, Yeah, but you need to you know, chewing chew, Yeah, you got Chewing's good.
If someone gave me a seventeen thousand dollars bill, though, I would just be sipping, Oh my god, just go to Mexico, get me a stroke. Go to Turkey.
Yeah, go to.
Turkey or Mexico and get the same procedure done for three hundred.
Dollars exactly seventeen. Yeah, you've got to keep your eye on the bill.
At the dentist, man, I'm telling you because I go to one that's in I guess it's Beverly Hills, Ish or whatever, and you know, it's like Dentists to the Stars or whatever, and there I do like the way it's all. It's all women that run the place, and I really like that. And the dentist is she's really cool. But you can tell that during like work meetings or whatever, they're just about like how much up selling did you do? How much upselling did you do? Because my girlfriend recently went to my dentist because she needs to get a tooth through place, and I was like, well, you might as well go to you know, someone that's really great at the cosmetic part of it, because it's something that you deal with every day. Blah blah blah. And she went there and she I went out to go get something. I came back and go visited her in the chair while the doctor was like away for a second.
She was just chilling there and she's like.
They want me to like get this and this and this, and I just kind of declined because I just don't. And I'm like, yeah, I forgot to tell you. They are really hardcore on up selling.
It's crazy.
It's very mechanic energy.
Yeah, it is.
It really is where you're like, oh, I don't know what's happening, and you may be completely correct and this may ruin my life, but I also don't want to spend any more money, So just give me the bare minimum. Yeah, just change my oil.
Yeah, just just do that. You have to.
You have to hold the line. Yeah, I'm just here to do this. That's really nice. I'm just here to do it the whole time. And they're like, okay, fine, just I guess I'll just do this. Yeah, it's okay to just do that, guys.
Right, hold the line until your car's on fire or your mouth is bleeding, ye, then go back.
Yeah totally.
I mean if you notice you don't stop so well after refusing getting your great beds changed, Like that's when you change.
Them, right exactly. Do you know? What I do love about a not so much mechanic, but like a tire place is just being able to go in and get your tires filled for free. Have you ever done this? Oh, they can just fill up your air for free. It feels like the people at these tire places live to do this. They are always so unbelievably friendly about just filling up your tires. You know.
That's that's weird. That's a dream of mine.
I wanted to start a service that would just fill tires and they just be like a you know, you can pull off the road and they feel your tires and then you just leave. It's crazy, you know what I mean? Because like even though I have like, you know, I have a compressor. It's in my car, you know, and and it's battery powered and it works fine, but you can only do one tire at a time, right, and it's like and.
It's pretty slow.
And so these these you know, the tire places, they have these double compressor or whatever things, and there's like you know and you're done and you're done. You know, I want to I want to have that Formula one feeling like you.
Go into the pis like go go go work like.
I want that you pull it after going like thirty five miles the hour slowly.
D Yeah, now I'm stopping, do it guys.
I feel like people would be into that novelty. That really does feel like a business that could take off.
Yeah, Because I mean there's two things that people do in LA that I noticed those pet pup of mind. It's like, one, tire pressure is always off, which affects your fuel economy and the way the car handles and the way rides.
Secondly, driving position.
I see so many people who are shorter who are looking up when they're driving, and I'm like, what are you doing. That's a modern car just raised the sea level. It's so weird to me that people just like they have these weird driving positions and they just they're like, that's good.
I wonder if, with speaking as a short person, if there's like an insecurity thing where some short people are getting in the car and they're like, I'm not lifting the seat, I'm not being aided by the seat. I'm tall enough.
God, I hope not. I really, I hope not. I think you could be right in some cases.
I mean, I will speak for the short community. A lot of more bad, bad shorties.
Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, So the stereotype.
It is true.
Meanwhile, I'm riding as high as possible. I am flying in my seat. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, as I should be.
I mean you should be.
I mean it's like, you know, feel like feel like you're a part of the like you are the machine and I've become the machine.
This is kind of a mech that I'm yeah, exactly rating that guy.
Four worled mech percent.
I should have a bird bird's eye view at all times.
Yeah, I think so. And I think you know, and people be like, oh, who's that who's that tall? And you know, like you might as well get that vibe too.
Yeah, then throw people off. When I step out of the car, they're like, oh no, it's like, oh.
We're gonna get not as tall as I thought. I think that that's going to be more of the reaction. I don't think they're gonna say that persons short. They're just gonna be like, oh, just not quite as tall as I thought.
It's somewhere in between surprise and disupport. It's kind of about nothing. It doesn't alter their day or anything.
Okay, and then moving on. I better get that liquorice or whatever.
Someone on the wind the licorice kind of watching me the entire time. It's callowing me to get out of the car. When was the last time you had licorice?
Chris, I don't know.
I don't I want to know.
I don't like.
I don't like liquorice, none of them.
We're going to be well.
Red vines is not really licorice, right, and there's I know, but they call it, well do they it?
Maybe they don't.
Maybe they call it like licorice product.
Licorice inspired, Yeah, liquorish ness.
Uh, they're liquorice, nois.
I don't know, I mean no, last time I had liquorice probably a long time ago, A long time because I'm not a treacle. I love, No, just kidding, I don't know. I don't know what any of that is liquorice.
I haven't anymal But you're not so you're but you are counting red Vines as a non liquorice thing that you may have more recently.
I don't think I've had a red vine recently either.
I think redvine's disgusting.
They are disgusting.
As a kid, they taste good, I think because I remember having them as a kid and I was like, oh, these tastes weird, and you know how like those addictive products like diet coke or something like that.
It tastes like shit.
But then like people are still like doing it around you, and you're like, ah, maybe I'll give another chance, and then like it hooks then get into you. Yeah, and then it's like, okay, no, this is delicious. Like no, like Starbucks coffee. It's like Starbucks coffee. It tastes like shit.
Oh it's a bad drink.
It's a terrible drink. But people are like, no, I love it. I just love it. I'm like, I can't be friends with you.
I think.
I mean, the real uh deal breaker for me with a redvine is how soft it is?
You like you'd rather be like I like it, just absolutely no.
I like, you know, like a twizzler is kind of hard. I prefer that texture to like the weird, like your teeth just sinking. To weird. What is that texture even interesting?
Yeah, that is true. I'd never even thought about.
It because to the finger it's not that soft, but once it gets in your mouth, it's just dissolving.
And I like that, you know, you have it's nice to have a little bit of work. Yeah, with certain foods a little bit right, Yeah, because you already know it's like non nutritional food, but you might as well get some mastication energy good for your muscles and whatever.
That's a thing I feel like online where like I read that like young like teen boys are chewing gum a lot in order to like make their jaws better looking.
Yeah, that looks maxing whatever thing that they're doing.
What's this look?
I think it's called looks maxing. It's it's a it's a home like like a beauty trend for I think it's for kind of more towards the masculinish side or whatever like things where it's mainly like young boys going on.
I'm look max looks.
Looks maxing maximizing your low Yeah, and like working on the jaw line with the mastication they or like there's like a tool like this rubber puck thing that you chew on. Oh yes, contour lines and like subtle accentuation.
There's no way that's working. I don't imagine.
I don't people.
I don't know if people swear it is they chew on stuff just to give them that nice, firm jaw.
I don't know.
But like we're all chewing constantly, I know, But but are we chewing the work out?
You know?
It's like I'm lifting boxes all day or I'm lifting my keys that I've dropped on the floor for the fifth time.
In one day. But am I lifting two hundred pounds?
Right? No?
So got to get the hockey puck? Yes, where do you even buy that? Is that like an Amazon product?
I think I guarantee you if you did an Amazon search for like, why don't you call it like jawline Improvement max or maximizer, Like I guarantee there'll be a million products.
This feels I mean, speaking of up selling it the dentists. That feels like a product they should be selling at the front desk.
Oh yeah, you mean of the dentist. Yeah, yeah, you're right, Yeah, you're right. Well, let's put it this way. I have a I have a mouth guard that's a sleep guard. That's like to help sleep apnea.
Oh sure, sure.
And it's a custom scan of your mouth, you know, so it's very very precise. However, it really kind of cranks on your teeth. So in the morning when I get up the next day, it's just like if I bite down on something, it feels like my teeth are loose. Oh and I'm not really liking that vibe. But and I told my dentist. They're like, no, you just need to get used to it. And I'm like, is that true? Or am I fucking up my teeth and you guys wanting me to fuck up my.
Oh interesting, they're setting a trap.
Yeah, I'm gonna have to go down an AI worm hole.
Let a robot tell you about the dentist.
I let them my robot tell me about everything. Today, I was like, I was having trouble with my camp with my Polaroid, and I just was like having a casual conversation with it. It's like, oh, no, I meant to say this model. It's like, oh my bad, No, no, hold down the flash button for two seconds. You'll see the line uppear b.
I was like, this is a are you using just GPT four? Oh? Oh oh. Four oh, four, oh is the one?
Is that one you have to sign up for? I think you do have to sign up for it. Maybe I'm not totally sure, but I know I'm subscribed to chat GPT oh, just because I wanted to figure out.
But four, I was like insane.
Anytime, like my girlfriend or a friend will have questions and they're always like looking in manuals or they're doing a Google search, and then I just go to the AI and I immediately get the answer.
Wow, and you trust it every time.
I mean sometimes you have to like wonder and that I'll just cross reference with a web search or I'll rephrase the question to the AI and see if it yields the that's a great right to write.
Yeah, just test the waters.
Yeah, but it, I mean, it's incredibly accurate for things. It's it's really insane.
And it's on your phone.
It's just on the phone. Yeah. Wow, it's just a GPT app.
I feel ancient talking about this. I've used the text one basically is a thesaurus.
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure, for sure to get it on my phone. Interesting, Yeah, it's really nice on the phone. Also, Apple Intelligence is coming out. Oh, in a couple of weeks, right, Yeah, either a couple of weeks. I think they will launch it then, or maybe I think that they are going to launch it then, or it'll be a couple months after that. Yeah, okay, because they've been I have the developer, Oh beta, how's it going?
I like it?
I mean it's I mean, I don't know. They say that series better on it. I don't know if I've noticed that, because I don't really use Siri a ton, but supposedly it's better and it understands contexts and nuance and these types of things, which you would hope at this point, because man, I tell you it's searching and using serious like I come so close to throwing my frone phone every.
Day, completely worthless, sectivity.
Completely worthless. But you fall for it. Every time. You're like, not, maybe it's better.
Maybe she's changed.
Nope, not at all. She has not changed. Not a bit.
One thing that changed that I noticed. There was a short period where they were trying where I'd be like, I would say, hey, Siri, I'm trying not to activate my phone here, and then I'd be like text whoever, and then I would say, would you like me to message the person because it was like trying to keep it within the brand, and I was like, what, you don't try to.
Force me to use your vocabulary.
You know exactly what I'm talking about.
It's terrible.
So that was just another infuriating thing to deal with. I mean, speaking of infuriating things to deal with. Yeah, I was really looking forward to having your here on the podcast.
Yeaday.
I thought, Regg, you'll come by, we'll have a nice chat. Who knows what we'll talk about, but it'll it'll end and everything will be fine. So I was a little surprised. The podcast is a called I said no gifts, and you came kind of wandering into the studio holding what's clearly a gift for me. Is there any explanation for this?
Well, in all fairness, this was intended as a gift for you before you started this podcast. Oh okay, yeah, and so I feel like it's kind of grandfathered. So I guess this is okay, right, because I just didn't get the time to get it to you.
This makes perfect sense.
And it wasn't finished at the time, but my intention was there before the podcast, so well.
The podcast launched March twelfth, twenty twenty, and so obviously like the pandemic got in the way.
You're right, I guess that is what it was.
You were all hold up and you weren't able to stop.
By and they couldn't manufacture it. So yeah, yeah, that's totally true. I just I always forget about the pandemic.
But yeah, well should I open it here on the podcast?
Yeah? Yeah, give it it, give it, give it a whirl.
Okay, here we go.
It's a cute little like white bag. It's almost like a piece of China. Yes, you know, blue print on it.
It is, well, it doesn't feel like China.
But oh that's a nice crispy crunch m.
Yeah that's nice. Oh good.
Oh I actually, okay, so this is I have absolutely no Oh so it's Huckleberry Watts something cannabis and fuse. Are these gummies?
Yeah? Oh incredible?
Yeah, tell me why you brought these?
I brought it because I was thinking of a gift that I was like, well, I haven't been I haven't given I was given an extra box of them, you know, and I just haven't been giving them out. And I was like, well that counts as a gift and it's my you know, and it's something I made and it's the first time I've gotten to make something like that, and I like it, and I think that you'd like it if, I mean, if your brand of gummies, this is my brand of gummies.
Unbelievable.
Yeah, yeah, I think this is like the last one too.
When did you start making these?
I think it was last year?
Oh yeah, like me or not even that long ago, like maybe six months ago, seven months ago that came out.
Yeah, how did did this all come about?
Well, so Rose Delights is the company that makes this, and they I was a fan of theirs, and they reached out and asked about a collaboration and I was like, yeah, sure, that'd be great. And I'm from Montana, so our state is known for huckleberries.
Oh, I wasn't aware of this.
Yeah, it's very huckleberry centric and so I was like, I want to make a huckleberry flavored rose to Light. I think that would be really good. And so yeah, we just went in on that and I was trying to make it like lower sugar. It turns out they couldn't. But it's only like three grams of sugar per.
Right, unless you're eating a handful of these, which you probably.
Should should not do that because they're each ten milligrams. So I will say that. So people generally half it or a little quarter it. I eat a whole one because I just love it. Yeah, but people that I know who are sensitivec have taken one whole one, which I'm very surprised about.
H and they reported that they've had great times.
Interesting.
Yeah, I feel like with gummies, people are all over the map as far as their reaction to it. Totally, no one I think you do. That's why you need to start half just in case, do half.
If you're feeling good, then try a little bit more and then you're like, okay, this is my dose.
Right, that's the best way.
And with the development of this where you like trying different gummies, they were sending you new flavors or where they're just like, this is as close as we can get to Huckleberry.
Deal with it. I think they sent me maybe or no, actually I don't think that they sent me any of the test patches.
I don't think so.
But that's okay because when I made this video for it, you can check it in some my Instagram, like if you can scroll way back you'll see like that. I guess it's an ad but not really. It's it's me performing and just riffing on huckleberries.
Okay, sure.
And it's just it's too long, which I love about it.
It just keeps going and going.
My sweet spot is something. It just goes too fast.
It's just like you're like, okay, that feels okay, No a little bit more but no, wow.
No, okay, I give up. I give up. I'm just gonna chill now.
But yeah, yeah, anyways, it was fun to make the video and it was really it was just absurd, but the whole idea of thinking of the product, having it made, then doing this like ridiculous video where they didn't because the guys were like cool, they just let me do my thing.
There was no agenda. They're like, just do what you do.
I did that, and they just handled the lighting and had like cool camera and they were like such cool people, like the whole Rose Delight's crew.
They're very cool, and so I trusted them on it.
And then when they finally came and I got like a I guess a sample, but I think it would have been too late to change anything at that point.
I was like, this is really good, this real delicious.
Well, I mean you trusted the brand before.
Yes, so why not now? But yeah, it was fun and I've never done that before. And I just love the idea of like, oh, I have something and then having a thing, you know, a physical object right available in the world.
Cool.
Now, what is probably the only huckleberry flavored gummy?
Probably? Actually that's good to think about it.
What does a huckleberry taste like? I don't even I feel like you can't buy them at grocery stores.
They they're seasonal. Okay, you can buy things that are huckleberry flavored, whether they use huckleberries or if it's synthetic thing whatever. They taste kind of like a more candy natural version of a blueberry. Oh. Interesting, So they're a little perfume okay, Like there's like kind of a floweriness to the sweetness. It's a really beautiful sweet flavor.
And texturally, is it more like a raspberry?
No, it's like a blueberry. They look like blueberry.
I've got to get my eyes on this.
Yeah, check them out.
I apparently just don't have any idea what a huckleberry is.
Yeah, they're so good and they grow in other places besides Montana, but Montana's really like gone deep into it. So whenever you go into Montana stores, it's like huckleberry chocolate, huckleberry jam, huckleberry syrup, huckleberry whatever.
Really riding this thing. Yeah yeah, yeah, it looks almost exactly like a blueberry. I I could not conceptualize what it looked like. I assume kind of like a BlackBerry.
Yeah.
Yeah, I went when I was I'm from Montana, and I spent some time with my friend John. We had like a little high school reunion. And my friend John, growing up, his grandmother had a cabin or at home on this resort like called Lake five on the edge of West Glacier National Park.
Okay, it's called Lake five.
Lake five, Yeah, the number, yeah lake.
They were like nah, fuck this, They're like this has to be turned in now.
It's like that the what lake is it?
It's the sixth, No, the fifth, Okay, fine, Lake five, done, hold it up.
Just give it to him. I don't get tired of him bitching.
That was it, you know, because that's what it was like in the eighteen hundreds. But yeah, it was just like it's just like this like little resort lake, but homesteaders in the early years established property there. So there's like two families, the ride Hours and the Bennetts. Oh, they're right next to each other, and they knew each other and they were friendly, but there have been like rivalries from their children. So and one is a like a resort that you can like stay at and like.
Blah blah blah.
And then the ride now is to have private property. So it's just so interesting their houses and then my friend's uncle's house, which is closer to the like. Anyways, we used to go there and it was awesome. And one summer when we had a reunion, we went Mount Mountain biking on mushrooms and we came up to the top of one are the trails that John makes. He makes these trails, and we stopped these like huggleberries and we just like ditched the bikes and like just started picking these things off the bush and just eating them.
And they were so good.
Oh that sounds good. To find a wild berry in any situation is really a magical thing. I would say, it's so great, especially on mushrooms, and.
Totally you're like, oh, I got everything is in your connecting and nature is the providence of whatever.
I just saw that what's her name, Alicia Silverstone was somewhere live streaming herself and she found a berry in a bush, and I think London was like asking her listeners should I eat this?
Then ate the berry?
And then it turned out of there was like a wildly poisonous berry. But it seems like she like as far as like believing in science and the sort of thing. She's kind of on the edge. I believe, so it's it felt like in line with what she's doing, But I don't. I didn't follow up with whether she died or not.
Yeah, she probably did.
Yeah, I think we should assume she did.
I think she did. You're right, we should assume that she did.
You're right.
I always forget that. That's how assumptions were when it comes to death.
It's rounding up.
It is, it's surrounding up. Yes, that's right, that is true.
She's dead. Our hearts go out to her family, Yes, all of our hearts do, right. But I guess I guess the difference here is that if you find a berry in the city, you probably shouldn't be eating a berry in the city.
No city berry is not not advice unless you absolutely know, if you're like a plant person and you really know and you've like read I'm sure there's an author you know that has written about berries in the city. You know, it's just like like you're my favorite barrier or whatever, and someone really knows. It's like printed in nineteen sixty three or something, and they're just using that as their guy, like, you.
Know, this color berry on this type of tree is safety. I don't know.
Scavenger's Guide to Berries in the City.
Yes, urban berries.
Do you know what I would love to do is go into a cranberry bog Ooh what's have you ever seen those the commercials, like the cranberry juice commercial commercials where they're standing in like a it's like a lake and they're just I don't understand and they're floating right, I don't understand. Why isn't that don't they do they do that to wash.
Them or something like that was the Yeah, you're right, I don't know, grow there. Maybe that's just a commercial thing, you know what I mean, Like like that's a that's a trope and they're like, no, people associate cranberries too, like just a large surface area of floating berries.
Like a flowing fluid. Yeah, yeah, I don't understand. They must they must have something to do with them growing.
Your Yeah, I would hope either that or it's just like, hey, these things float, let's just put them on water.
I mean it.
Could be that because we are talking about commer.
Yeah, so the world of commercials, anything can happen.
Yeah, And then I feel responsible, right, it's like, we don't need to educate people, just sell this product.
But I mean I feel like if those are just naturally occurring, why haven't I been in one already, just kind of wading through this lake of berries.
I think it's probably maybe a hygiene thing.
I would imagine, Oh, interesting, like one it probably like one one did three people Max can like you know, cruise through there before it gets contamplated.
Yeah, they can't chlorinate the fields or the water.
Go to Wisconsin, Massachusetts and New Jersey. You can go to keep cod What for a cranberry bog.
And what what's happening?
They grow?
They grow in bogs like marshy lands. Yeah, acidic bogs from the bottom of the land out.
So they are educating people. Wow, wow, Well.
They're leaving, they're letting people educate themselves, presenting this mystery, saying you figure it out.
Yeah, I think I think it's for those people that even notice it. I think like some people are like, yeah, that's cool cranberry stuff, you know, and that's it. And then some people are like, wait a minute, but that would be kind of cool to like wade in something. Wait a minute, wonder if that's true. And then they look and they're like, oh shit, they grow so that's cool. But when I hear a bog, I'm thinking of like maybe because it has ag in it, like fog, you know, Like I'm thinking like it's foggy, and.
Then there's like a creature and there's.
Like caling, you know, and it's like what was that?
My god? So is it like that?
Yes, exactly. There's like I imagine one of those trees with glowing eyes and the branches for arms and wrap around.
Of course, that's the first thing that you see. That's the very very as soon as you go into a bog like this, it's just immediately there that that tree with glowing eyes and branches that look like arms and branch yeah whatever.
Yeah, bog is not something you usually associate with like the sun shining, or like cranberry juice. You are imagining potion.
Yeah, I'm thinking potions. I'm thinking like something mysterious, foreboating, dangerous, cauldrons, cauldrons, Yeah, yeah, interesting, Yeah.
I don't know bayways. Yeah. So now I'm not gonna eat cranberries because that's gross.
Yeah.
Who would have thought? Interesting? I guess you just come upon these just giant lakes of red berries floating, and you say, let's turn this into a juice factory.
Yeah, I guess so, yeah, because I imagine it just looks like a cluster of like dark trees in the distance, and then you get close to it and you see kind of a trail that's going between like two really dark trees, and you're like, what is this and you like kind of go down I guess like at least probably sixty feet, and then then boom, You're like, oh shit, and there's like rays of sun coming through some of the branches, and you just see this red you know, berry floating liquid mass.
You've left like a trail of bread crumbs back to of course, back to the road.
We sixty feet.
I mean, you know how memory works, It's like every foot it's like diminishing your memory of where you started.
After ten feet, you have no idea you were five seconds.
Success, So sure ten feet is all it takes. So that's yeah, ten.
Feet is all it takes. Is the billboard let people.
Could you, hey, could you come here for a second?
Bring that water over your thanks a lot, Hey could you go back to where you were?
What?
Where was?
I don't know. It's like seep, I told you.
That's why I always stop at nine feet pause because it recess after two seconds and.
Then back to a little bit too. High school reunions. Do you go to every high school reunion?
Yes? No, No, I've not been to one. I feel bad about.
Oh so this was just like a reunion with the high school.
Yes, like high school like like friend group.
This makes more sense. Yeah, yeah, it felt out of character that you were like headed back to the high school reunion.
Yeah.
Like there's like four hundred kids or kids they're adults now, but like four hundred adults like on mountain bikes, just like to the forest.
Be guys Hunckleberry bush huncle By, Hey, Huckleber, Huckleberry, Hucklebert.
It's the graduating class of mountain bike high. Yeah, I I just don't have it's interest wise. High school reunion doesn't. Yeah you have, I've never been to one. Okay, it feels I mean, first of all, traveling back home for that feels.
Where's back home?
Utah? Utah, Utah. So it's a kind of Montana Jason, Yeah, it.
Is, Yeah, Colorado, Utah.
But we don't I don't believe we have huckleberries.
Utah doesn't sound like huckleberries.
I think it's a desert. I mean it's a desert, so too dry.
Yeah, yeah, it's definitely too dry. Huckleberries are like forests, like pine pine.
The bears are finding them. Yes, they're eating them with their honey.
Yeah, yeah, with their pots of honey. Let's honey on them.
Well, is there anything else we should say about these edibles? I mean, have have you had any experiences where you've had too much edible?
Any memorable?
Oh gosh, yeah, there was a I think they still exist.
There's a brand of brownie that is infused with tac and it's called I think Corova the name of the brand. And this is pre compliance days and I just remember someone saying like, yeah, this is like a lot of THC and I was like, oh, well, I'll be the judge of that.
And then I got a Coroova bar and.
It's like a like a brownie probably about that big, kind of about.
Like that thick.
The brownie is about brownie size.
About brownie size, but like a good size brownie. Yeah, not like small. Don't feel like you got ripped off now, like a medium sized brownie, medium to large. And I remember like seeing the dose. I can't remember what the dosage was. It was a thousand milligrams maybe or something like that for the whole bar, okay, And so I calculated, you know, how much of the bar I could have in order to have like forty miligrams or something like that, And I cut this really thin, like brownie brittle thin slice.
Off of it, right, and I ate that. And I don't think I've been higher off of an edible from that much. Yeah, Like I don't.
Know what happened, Like it was definitely I must have miscalculated or something.
Oh and it was hard.
Like because I got sick, you know, because I'm pretty Me and TCH like we're pretty good. We worked really well together. I really like the drug. But classic team, A classic team, not everybody. I have a lot of friends, including my girlfriend, They're just like, no, it gives me anxiety. And then I'm of course, my immediate thing is like, well you just haven't tried the right strain and the dosage, but not like, oh that sucks, you shouldn't do that, Like I'm just immediately like I think I can find a way for you to enjoy it is my immediate reaction always. But yeah, yeah, but that was so much that I was getting sick, like I was feeling like nauseous, wavy, like I was in a boat that was just constantly like being tossed around, and it just yeah, I just felt gross and sick. And it took me probably like an hour and a half to get out of that zone.
That was way too much.
Were you just at home?
I was at home, okay, thank god? Yeah, of course. Yeah. No, when I'm experimenting with high doses, I'm not going out. Wow.
So you're you just felt sick and then it was over. Did it last after the hour and a half, Yeah, like.
The stone feeling was there for sure, but you know, because like edibles can get in there and stay for pretty long time.
Yeah, of course, you.
Know how long did it take to kick in?
Ah, probably like forty five minutes, and.
Then you're just suddenly getting slammed with this not shoh yeah, like.
Well, like it's it.
First it feels like, oh I'm getting high and you know, and then like maybe fifteen twenty minutes goes by as it's climbing, and then you're like, Okay, this is that level that's comfortable.
Oh shit, I know we're going to keep going.
Okay, well, I think this will be oh my god, oh shit, you know, it just keeps going and going and going.
What did you do with the rest of the brownie?
I think I kept it in my freezer forever. It might still be in there. Yeah, it might still be in there. It might still be in there. Yeah, but I would never I don't like overdosing on THC edibles.
Why.
It's just not a fun feeling, and it can I don't know. I think sometimes it can turn people off because they have too much and then they kind of give.
Up on it.
Yeah, I don't want to go back there sort of.
Yeah, and I'm like, no, it's it's you can. You can do it because I believe in you.
Well, you now have kind of a stake in people trying it, So you've got to You've got to get as many people.
Yeah, I have to get people hooked on Huckleberry edibles. Like that's that's my because that's my market. That's how I exist, That's how I survived, that's where my ideas come from. Every time I sell one of these, I get better ideas. So so if you want better art, you all of you cameras.
Know Reggie is looking to all fifty cameras in the studio.
Fifty cameras.
Yeah, it's crazy how many cameras there are right here. And the cool thing is like I'm only playing to the cameras, like I'm assuming the camera is the audience at home kind of a VR experience. Yeah, yeah, it's just like I'm addressing the camera. So if people feel a little disconnected from the way I've been on this podcast, then then just know that that's why there's like an uncanny valley.
I'm focusing just on these cameras.
I'm now talking to the camera. I feel like we should just do the rest of the podcast talking to our individual camera.
Look at you.
It feels really comfortable.
A great looking camera.
Damn it looks like it can move on its own, and you can focus on it.
Does look like it can move or swivel.
Yeah, it's it's a robot. It's a robot camera.
And then there's this middle one, yeah, which is kind of our shared We'll have to fight over that in the divorce.
That's true.
Yeah, that's our child's camera. But I do hope that you win, like I do hope you win. I mean, I'll still go through the whole process, but.
You're secretly rooting for me in this divorce.
Yes, I want you to have that.
Okay, well, I think we should play a game.
Oh what do you lying to playing a game?
I need a number between one and ten from you and think this through. Be very careful.
It's turn into a werewolf.
Wow, that was the one question you could never be answered, just like the seven foot tall wolf figure. And I'm like nine, the most specific curse possible. Someday you'll be asked when just be wary.
Eight.
Okay.
I have to do some light calculating with your number to get our game pieces. So right now, you can recommend, you can promote, you can do whatever you want.
I'll be right.
Oh, okay, okay, yeah, and so I never thought it was going to work out. We sent four two more packages and they didn't really get in in time. But you know, it's still cool, like we still made it happen, and then we'll probably do it again, so we'll still use the stuff that we ordered.
Yeah, I don't know. We had a fun time.
It was kind of cool sometimes like not everything has to be perfect for something to be really fun. And I'm just glad that we did it. Oh and if you get a chance, say to Margaret, hey, don't forget about those pants. She'll get it. It's so good.
Are you talking about the huckleberry?
Yeah to the camera, okay, perfect.
Yeah, so you're not mate, there are no more of.
These now that's I think that's the last one you've got, the.
Last I got the berry.
Yeah, this is you can keep it in there and tell it like years from no for like sixteen dollars.
This is I'll finally retire using this box of gummy.
So I look what I got, an unopened last of the runt.
Whoa, and I know where his brownie is?
Yeah, yeah, yea, yeah yeah yeah maybe.
Perfect listener, I guess you're out of luck, but keep an eye on redch and you never know when something might pop up.
They're going to reissue, They're going to reissue.
There will be a reissue. There will be a retro throwback.
There will be a retro throwback.
Garanthe listener, don't forget the live show is coming up October thirteenth. Go to the Bellhouse and why dot Com or Google? I said, no gifts live. Do whatever you need to do in order to find information on the Internet. I can't babysit you. Okay, this is how we're going. We're playing a game called Gift or a Curse. Okay, I'm gonna name three things. You'll tell me if there're a gift or a curse and why, and then I'll tell you if you're right or wrong, because there are correct answers, so be very careful.
Okay, I'm gonna think extra all right.
This first one is from a listener named Stephanie, and she suggested gift or a curse. Open air cars that have two wheels in front and one wheel in the back.
Curse Why they look stupid as fuck?
Wrong?
Oh, it's a gift.
Oh it is.
I sawone on the freeway here today. I mean it was a very confusing site. I think the reason these things are a gift is I don't know who's buying them. I'm not sure what the point is. There's a lot of you know, it's giving me something new to think about.
Whenever I'm driving.
If I spot one of these, I think, what to what end? Where did this person come from? Where are they going? Is it a vehicle that's meant for a practical purpose or is this something you just zip around town in.
Yeah?
And I love that, Okay.
I love gives you something interesting.
Something interesting. It's a nice little spark in the world. You know. It's kind of the opposite end of the spectrum from the cyber truck, which I know what's going on, and I know everything involved is horrible. You know, I have too much information on that car. So these bizarre ones that are happening that Stephanie is obviously can't stop thinking about herself gift gift until I find out more.
I'll think, I'll think of I'll think about that.
That's a good that's a good way of like, you know, probably a more positive way of dealing with it from now on.
Yes, dealing with it is.
I think it is it is definitely.
Everyone is going through something when they see that, When they see a car like that in the Free You're like, huh huh hm hm eh.
It feels like something you build a home. I feel like, yeah, I don't know where you would buy that.
I don't know. I mean it's I think one of the brands is can Am.
Is that true?
Yeah? Canam Canam? Yeah?
Is that a point on PanAm?
It could be, and I hope it is. It's like his grandmother's name was pam Ann. He's like, well, in honor of my grandmother's can it It's like it's not spelled the same.
It's like, yeah, it was kind of close.
It's a subtle reference reference, tasteful re instagram.
My family will know. Okay it is. That's true.
Okay, so zero for one, zero out of one. So far, not bad at all. Flying high number two. This is from Somebody named Rebecca. Gift to a curse when an American actor plays a historical figure from another country but does not use an accent, even though everyone else in the film is using an accent.
What is it is a plus or a curse?
Gift?
This is a plus or minus?
No plus no blesses. I would say, I'd say a case why well, because once you're aware of it, and if you remain aware of it for the entire film, it's just torture. I think, uh yeah maybe. And also I'm the type of person that is very affected by things that I noticed that are not exactly like they're just a little off, and so I might that might drive me crazy towns right right, That.
Is correct.
We love to see somebody making a choice. We love the actor showing up on set and saying I have a new take on this person. They're American.
Fine, fine, it's a you know what.
A wonderful thing to go to a movie. Everybody else is kind of sticking to whatever's happening. Then we have one person that we never forget that we're in the movies. This person is there to remind us. Yes, they you know, otherwise we might think that we've traveled back in time.
Yes, right, orienting, Let's say hello, I'm Winston Churchill. Yes, let's not gave into those Germans. Let's do something Hello, yes missus pipswitch. No, the apothecary is still not here. And I was on the pavement earlier today in the lift I'm Winston Churchhill.
I would like to see that with a real strong Midwest accent. You know, somebody shows up and just that type of American accent.
Yeah, that would be interesting.
Actually, that's even more.
That would be a gift to me. That's a gift that's added value. The other one is more like what if they just they're like, okay, they're like, can you do this role?
Absolutely? Can you get the accent? Absolutely?
And they work with an accent coach for three months and they're like, how is it it's like.
And then the trainer's like, I don't think.
They're like, well, I guess just it's too late now, so I guess just don't use the accent.
People won't notice. They'll get used to it.
The thing is, if you keep doing something, people just get used to it, and you'll be supported by other people having the accent, so they'll just kind of fill it in in their imaginations.
Well, hopefully we can see that soon. It is a gift. You've missed two so far, and I say it again, not bad. This final one is from somebody named Trevor gift Or a curse Winter.
Well, I'm mean, hopefully I'll get this one wrong too, because I love symmetry. I no, I think I think it's a gift. Why, well, I pronounced a jiff shift. Yeah, it's a gift. The original creator of the word gift always intend something else in mind, something else.
In mind, and always intended to be gift. Uh.
Yeah, I think it's I think it's a gift because I love winter. I think it's it's good looking generally, even when it's miserable. There's like something about staying inside and staying warm and being cozy and you know, making a good meal, and you know, having the gear to feel comfortable outside when you are outside, and you know, knowing how to deal with it. I think it's a I think it's a nice gift. And it's good to have something to contrast spring in summer and fall too.
I'll throw that in.
It's a gift. You've got the point. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. I love winter.
I love a time that allows me to be cozy, to wear pants all the time, to wear more than two pieces of clothing.
So nice.
And it is nice looking in most places.
Yeah, I mean cities. It does get gross after traffics.
Right, get kind of the gray slush. But that's also something to think about and to appreciate when it goes away as a nice feeling. Yes, you know, it's just a whole thing that you get to kind of appreciate.
Yeah.
I love winter.
Yeah, me, winter love.
I think everyone secretly loves winter, as long as they're not scraping snow off of a wind shield.
Oh that is the worst.
That's but that's you know, that's not Winter's fault as much.
No, I mean, I guess it's good exercise.
Good exercise.
You're late.
Oh, then you're freaking out. Yeah, you're probably not even You've got a small hole that you're looking through.
Yes, you're like, that's good enough.
Going defrostrts to maximum constant constant chi wiper's constant with us slowly turn a slash. I'm starting to see a little bit more horrible feel.
Okay, we got one out of three. Hey, you know what they say, that's an A plus exactly. If I remember my school system, an A plus one out.
Of three one three is an A plus. Yeah that makes sense. Yeah, I was like, I think our school, Wittier School in Great Falls, was the first to adopt that grading system, and.
We all support that system, of course. All right, well this is very well played, and this is the final segment of the podcast. This is called I said no emails people right into I said no gifts at gmail dot com begging for answers, desperate pans. Wow, their lives are a mess.
Damn.
Will you help me answer a question?
Yes?
Okay, let me get into the doc here. Okay, this is simply Bridger. A lot of the time they'll also say Bridger and guests. So this person immediately has created an issue.
Attention.
That's fine, Okay, Bridger, I need help. My boyfriend is a big gamer. We have been together for about two and a half years and lived together. I have bought him many game related presents over the last two years, including a switch, a new computer monitor, a gaming chair, etc. He also loves coffee, so I bought him a latte maker for Christmas two years ago. I have also tried to buy him clothes slash shoes because he's very large six foot nine and size seventeen double wide and shoes, and those are typically very expensive. But those are not very exciting gifts to give. He's a funny guy who is just hard to shop for. Unfortunately, I feel like I'm running out of gifts to give him. For his last birthday, I gave him headphones for working out and gift cards to Steam so he can buy some games. Do you have any suggestions for gifts? I love him a lot, but I feel you can only give so many gift cards to Steam. Thanks for the help. And that's from Sarah from Chicago. Interesting. I mean, obviously the first answer, if you're running out of gifts to give someone, you have to leave it's a relationship.
Yeah, that is That is a kind of an easy indicator.
Yeah, very clear sign that things are over.
Yeah.
Yeah, because if you can't, if they are not inspiring you to get a gift for them, Right, how are you going to end of the road? Yeah, that's it, because it's just gonna it's going to collapse.
It's I mean, it's already collapsing. You're on the bridge and it's falling underneath you.
You have like seconds to jump so you can reach that ledge that isn't falling and pull yourself.
Up, prove your upper body strength.
Yes, so true.
True, But I mean assuming she stays in this kind of dark, bleak relationship, yeah, into the road style relationship.
For sure.
She's complaining about buying these huge shoes, saying that it's not a fun gift to give. I actually completely disagree. Oh yeah, when I'm at the Nordstrom rack, I love to take a peek at the huge shoe aisle. You can get into some very big footwear, and it's a it's a different world from the shoes I'm looking at. Yeah, so I feel like Sarah for herself, she can save herself a lot of grief by having a good time looking at huge shoes. She heads to any store and asks, just point me in the direction of the things that are seven sizes bigger than most people.
Right, right, I mean huge shoes. Yeah, what's your shoe size? Mine is super huge. It's like twelve or eleven a half.
Oh that's a that's a good sized shoe.
Eleven and a half to twelve.
It's not a seventeen.
It's not even close.
How big is a seventeen shoes?
Big as this table?
It's probably about four feet long?
Yes, four feeling for sure?
I mean, I mean, I think if we did the math, which we don't need to because we're definitely no.
One, please, no one do the math.
Don't do the.
Math, waste of time.
We're definitely right about this, but it's like three i'll say three and a half to four.
Feet long, right, right, and a shoe that's four feet long. What a novelty to look at.
I know, I really is. If you can even lift them inside of your car.
Right, you have to borrow a friend's truck. To borrow a truck, which is another fun little experience in and of itself. Call someone up, I'm buying Roger New shoes. Can I borrow the truck for the weekend? And you have to hire like a task grab it to help you get them out of the mall? Yes, which I think I mean the fact that fork lift. Of course you're renting the fork clift or one of what are those things that's like a forklift but it's small and you can push it.
Oh like a wheelbar No, no, a wheelbarrow, a hand truck.
Well, it has like the forkliff mechanism. Oh, it's like I guess it's a hand forklift.
Oh oh, yeah, I know we're talking about. Yeah, that's a.
Pallet, Yeah, like a pallet. Pallet, not a cleanser. Pallet, not cleanser pallet. Uh yeah, transport palette, transport pallet lift, pallet, pallet lift, pallet vehicle.
So yeah, either a forklift or the pallette lift to get out.
Of the mall.
To the forklift, yes, to the truck.
Yeah, well the pallet would totally work because it's not height specific to be able to carry it out.
Unless they have one of those little alarms on the wheel that you can't get that far.
Out of the mall shut down.
Yeah yeah, yeah, kind of like a shopping cart style.
Oh that way, that's pretty cool. But yeah, you just moved the vehicle closer. That's it.
Kind of park in a red zone for a minute, the.
Red zone hazard lights that protects you. It's a force field. Everybody knows that that will last you up to six hours. Yeah, that's a six hour force field. The law enforcement will be like, well, they.
Do have their flashes on, so let's just keep going.
Park the fire truck somewhere else.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's fine. No, that's fine.
I don't think there's gonna be a fire today, so let's just let them do that.
I'm sure it's going to be quick. It feels quick.
This feels like a four foot shoe buy.
Yeah, definitely four foot shoe buy for sure.
Well, the fact that she even rode in is kind of mysterious. When the answer has been here right in front of.
Her, they just get into the huge shoes thing, the.
Huge shoes thing. And I mean, I will say, you can't buy a person too many gift cards.
I don't think so. I mean, well I think you could.
So there's like a toxic toxicity level where the person will be poisoned.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, because they'll probably develop some kind of like an unhealthy psychological condition where they'd be like I have too many gift cards and I can't spend all of them, I can't use all of them, and they've been locked to my name, so I can't give them away either, you know, So that that would be like you're like spending all the time, You're just trying to spend, and you're like, get I mean that could make them, Yeah, that could make someone crazy.
So drive them insane with gift cards. Yeah, okay, so well maybe then maybe you're on Sarah's side here. I fully disagree, but maybe you know, push the gift cards as far as possible.
What about a massage?
Oh, you know, like a gift card to a massage.
Yeah, like like give him an.
Experience, such an underrated gift.
Yeah.
I feel like almost everyone loves to get them sage. And it's always no matter unless you have some injury. It feels like a splurge, no matter what. If you're buying it for yourself. Yes, so it's like someone buys it for you. They've really done some work, some emotional work that you don't have to go through on your way.
To the parlor. That is correct.
So you get the gift certificate. Interesting gift certificate. I love a gift certificate gift yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I love a piece of paper proving that that gift has been I.
Have by gift congratulations, new gift.
May you use it?
Well, they're wearing their cap and gown. No, we need to get back to the gift certificate.
Yeah.
I loved that kind of the oversized envelope that they would come in.
Yeah, that feels certified.
It was certified, and it was easily copied and could probably be duplicated by some sort of forger.
Yeah yeah, but you know it started certified.
It starts it and that's what's important.
Yeah, And I think that's cool, and yes, I agree. I think gift certificates would be the way to go.
Get gift certificates. Fill the shoes with gift certificates. Oh that's yeah, that's cool. Kind of like the tissue that keeps them. Yeah, except for crumpled certificates.
Yeah, the shape keeps the shoe shape. Shoe shape, Steffans, I.
Haven't seen that tissue in a shoe for a while.
I have you have? I recently had something because now they use the cardboard shapes. Oh, which or not? I don't like that at all.
I mean, I don't know.
I mean they look kind of cool when you pull them out, but yeah, the paper's kind of a little bit nicer of a feeling.
Right, like being able to pull that out, it feels like you're gutting the shoe.
Yeah, totally. It's like I caught you. Now, it's like, now I'll get to you as you I don't know, something like that.
Well, Sarah from Chicago, if the relationship isn't already over, we found a couple of ways to save it.
Yeah, at least for the time being. I think you have some great options and you should, really, you should really go for it.
I mean, look feels to me like she is looking at gift giving as entertainment for herself rather. Yeah, she's bored with giving gifts and that's not her boyfriend's fault.
That is potentially true. Yeah, she could be projecting onto where he's like, I don't need anything, I just love you, babe, you know something like.
That, and she's meanwhile bored at the mall looking for looking at big shoes.
Yeah, it's like I don't know what to get you.
It's like, ask you give me anything, babe, No, you need something, you know something I don't know.
This is relationship sabotage.
Yeah, I mean couples do this to each other all the.
Time, constantly. It's a classic case.
And that's kind of what you're supposed to do.
You know, sabotage the relationship.
So sorry, but yeah, sir, it's like gift based sabotage, you know, and a lot of like misunderstandings, like like manufactured misunderstandings. That feels like a description of this podcast. Yeah, manufactured misunderstandings. I mean the subtitle, well.
Beautiful Sarah, do not write back in, oh, Reggie, Well I've got this your own. I mean I would eat one right now, but I have to drive home two freeways, like I mentioned, two freeways that could be a dangerous activity for everybody. I mean, it's hard enough with me sober on the road. And I also could save these four two years and get my sixteen dollars cash out.
Yeah, that's it, guaranteed sixteen dollars.
So there's a lot that could possibly happen with these gummies, and I'm thrilled to have them.
I'm so glad that you were able to receive them.
Well, I've had a wonderful time with you here today. Thank you for being here, my absolute place listener. The podcast is over. I don't even know where to guide you from here. You have got to find your way out of the forest. I hope you have a wonderful day. The podcast is over. I love you, goodbye, I said, no gifts isn't exactly right production. It's produced by our dear friend Annalise Nelson and it's beautifully mixed by Ben Holliday. And we couldn't do it without our guest booker, Patrick Kottner. The theme song, of course, could only come from miracle worker Amy Mann. You must follow the show on Instagram at I said, no gifts. I don't want to hear any excuses. That's where you get to see pictures of all these gorgeous gifts I'm getting. And don't you want to see pictures of the gifts?
The lie in why did you hear?
Fun? A man myself perfectly clear? But you're a guess to me. You gotta come to me empty, And I said, no guests. You're our presences. Presence enough. I'm already too much stuff. So how do you dan disurvey me The
