I Said No Gifts! A comedy interview podcast with Bridger WinegarBridger isn't at all horrified when Eliot Glazer (You're Making It Worse, Broad City) makes the mistake of arriving with a gift. The two discuss home decor, sleepless nights, and religion at Entertainment Tonight.
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Well, I invited you. Hear, I thought I made myself perfectly clear. But you're a guess, Tom. You gotta come to me empty And I said, no guests. Your presences presents enough. I already had too much stuff, So how did you dare to surbey me?
Welcome to? I said, no gifts. I'm Bridgard Wineger. We're in the backyard. It's absolutely beautiful. The birds are chirping. Tomorrow it'll be ninety nine degrees, so we're just enjoying the last moment of mild temperatures. I refilled the windshield wipe or fluid in my car, just mostly to stop the beeping. My entire life is just kind of about lowering the amount of beeping going on. And so that's nice and I'm able to see through the windshield. Now what else is going on? I saw an hour of Megalopolis last night. That was enough. And now here we are ready to go. I'm so so excited about today's guest. It's Elliott Glazer. Elliott hey Man, Welcome to. I said, no gifts.
What is Megalopolis?
Oh my, are you not familiar with Megalopolis?
I don't know what this is.
This is Francis Ford Coppola's new movie that he sold his entire wine business, I believe, to finance or his half of the wine business, to finance a movie, to finance a movie that is is maybe the worst film I've ever seen. Oh no, yeah, it feels tough.
Wait, he's he financed by selling his wine company. Yes, and his wine company is very profitable and apparently people like the wine. Yeah, I've heard it's made more. It made him more money than his films.
Well, it's going to make him more money than this one will wow.
Yeah.
I think he's been wanting to make it for decades. Right, he had this idea. Maybe he heard the word megalopolis and thought someone's got to make that movie, and has been trying and trying and failing and finally said, well, let's just sell my children's inheritance and make a movie out of it. And what better way to spend like one hundred and fifty million dollars than on a movie of course, with a limited release.
Who's in it?
Adam Driver, Aubrey Plaza, John Voight, Jason Schwartzman. When I left the movie, he had had one line.
Is it so? It's a long one it's about.
It's not as long as you would think. It's two hours and twenty minutes. Okay, but it does. I started to feel a little sleepy.
And you were in it was USA in the theater, yes, oh wow.
And you know I saw people walking out that were clearly like, we didn't know what this was. We've got to get out of here.
It was that bad.
It's crazy.
Oh no.
I mean, Adam Driver can control time or you can stop time, but it doesn't really play into the movie. Aubrey Plaza plays a character named Wow Platinum, who is a news reporter for the money Bunny.
How does a movie I mean, I know it's cliche at this point, but how is it possible that one of the greatest filmmakers of the of our era, of the of the medium itself could make something so poor and not get financed, Like like nothing makes sense.
I mean I imagine if this script was all that people were going on, that would be.
The answer, right, and that so it speaks for itself.
Yeah, I mean the whole time I was thinking that theme of this movie is very much this is very important to your grandfather. I see, just essentially like Grandpa wants to make a movie and.
So well, John Voyd is the first sign. Yeah. I mean, listen, he's an amazing actor, but his politics at this point supersede his talent. He's such a he's such a coup.
He's crazy, he's such a coop. I mean they've kind of driven his driven Angelina away right, Oh yeah.
Far away. I mean he's there, No, they're no nowhere near each other. I feel like he speaks to her through like entertainment tonight. I think that's how they communicate.
That's the only way to gate to a child. Yeah, John Tesh is the middleman.
John Tesh. I still remember seeing a clip as a kid, or maybe I don't know how young I was, but of John Tesh, this is maniacal of him. I guess backstage at entertainment tonight or maybe on the road touring, but either way, he was backstage and he had a bowl of syria and he filled it with water instead of milk.
By necessity or because that's what he prefers.
That's what he prefers. Yeah, crazy, that's just that's psycholog that's psychologically deficient.
When does that begin? I mean, was his mother serving him cereal covered in water who knows.
I don't know. I mean you mix that with his like new age jazz and his religion. You know, wait, what's his really?
I wasn't aware there was a religious aspect.
I think he's evangelical Christian.
Oh interesting, I believe, yeah, like hardcore hardcore.
I had no idea, I think so unless I made that up. I mean, I know he's No, I believe that's that's true.
Wow, all of these et reporters, Mary Heart's real conservative conservative?
Yeah you want to. I mean all those that that line of thinking is already fascinating that somebody like Mary Hart, you know, is like aligned with just like celebrity gossip and la and then happens turns into like a Trumper.
I thought these people had integrity.
It's just so, I don't know. It's like you imagine somebody surrounded by, like I'm gonna say it, like gay makeup artists, you know, and hairstylists, and then they're like at Trump rallies. I don't know if she's is she a Trumper? Just because she is? Yeah? I think so too.
You know, I don't think her name would really be in the news other.
No, no, No, it's it's no, it's like her Shazam and uh Chachizam. Who is the guy who played Shazam just came out for Trump.
I have no idea who played Shazam.
His name is Zachary Levi. He was on the RFK cruise. There was fundraising cruise out of Marina del Rey with dread Matteo Shazam. Sheryl Hines like, how did that not end in a mass suicide? That is so crazy? Isn't that crazy? And the poster for it was like barely done on Canva, like barely canva, like genuinely, like what program did you even use?
You know?
But now Zachary Levi or Shazam is like he's going to Trump. He's out for Trump because he was an RFK stan Wow.
On these cruises, do you think each of them is like everyone's a loser here but me?
Who for RFK?
Yeah, for any of these weird cruises. They're like I'm sure the rest of them suck and the bus or their careers failed. But I'm okay, I.
Think that's I mean, I mean there's got to be a mass illusion going on there anyway, right, there has to be right, so you know, of course it takes. That's the next level of it.
Yeah. Cheryl Hines, for me is the most disappointing.
I think disappointing.
She plays such a common sense character on Curb and you're always like, I'm on Cheryl's.
Correct, and then you're just like, oh him. I guess I think maybe when I thought a Kennedy, you know, if i'd learned about it maybe a year or two ago, it was like, Okay, I guess Kennedy, Sure, but this one, this guy, I mean, he's just so bizarre. Are He's so he's so bizarre.
The thing about Kennedy's is I don't associate Kennedy's with sun damage.
No you don't.
You kind of of course they're out on the beach, you know, but I feel like they're always taking care of themselves or they have good routine, nighttime routine. Yes, he is leather.
Yeah, he's like they're they're very like, you know, Cape Cod, Yes, and he's very like Boca Modesto. Yeah, forget, forget, forget Boca. It's like, yeah, Tampa Baker's face. He's very Baker's Field. Yeah, it's rough.
Is a is a rough go So yeah, this cruise, Drea Damas. I mean, it's just interesting. You just watched the collision of a person's career falling apart in them joining these loser purposes like, oh no, now I've got some big ideas and this is the reason my I mean, the rest of you are the reason my career failed. And I'm a smart one.
I really don't. I don't know, I don't really understand it, but I do. It's just so bizarre to live in a time where we've watched social media, you know, becomes so all consuming so quickly, but you can look at somebody's feed, or you can just look at their sort of like their their aesthetic. If you see skulls and crossbones, or you see red, white and blue, or you see flags, and you're like like you know what's coming, and you know, like Instagram, I think, I don't know how I even stumble on it. But Drea de Matteo, who I wouldn't think about in a million years of but she a clip of her floated up in through my algorithm of her on Megan Kelly's podcast. But it's just a clip where she's saying, I'm She's like, I'm from New York, so I've always loved Trump, And it's like, that's as a New Yorker. It's like, that's not how that sentence ends for anybody else ever, It's just like, I'm from New York and Trump was always a joke. And she's like, I'm from New York and I've always loved Trump. So I've always loved Trump. So but do you mean so as a joke? Not as a joke. It makes no but it's it's but that's the world we live in. Dread Matteo is like stumping for RFK and Trump and.
And building buzz for her brand, building buzz her brand she does only fans like, Okay, it's all but it's all.
This sort of circuitous. It's just a strange journey that's happening right for so many it feels very binary too. Oh of course, that's what's bizarre.
And it feels like, Yeah, as soon as the career shows any signs of cracking, it's like, okay, we're rebranding, I'm revealing that I can't read right right and moving forward.
Something there's a new, there's something is new in the narrative. Yeah, something is popping.
Out or something's always been simmering.
Yeah, you can. That's the thing too. It's like I never thought twice about Shazam, you know, but he's said a couple of things that have been like questionable, and then it's like and then it like you're saying it, then it spills, and then it just fully you know, it's like he's at c with RFK and now he's just full on trump like okay, you know, like it it just but you're right, it's just like it's a it's sort of it comes out slowly and then it's a.
Just a torrent a torrent. What Wasuzam before Shazam?
What was Shazam before Shazam?
Yeah?
But did he was he? I think he was in maybe like a sitcom or something. Okay, I think he was in like some like two thousand sitcom. I'm not really sure he.
Was in Chuck. He was then he was also like the male voice lead Entangled, which is what my brain goes to a rough Yeah, okay, interesting, Okay, So now I'm also saying a bit of a crossover with James L. Wood's playing Hades and Hercules. Oh yeah, so I wonder if there's a you know, he's getting need to.
But that's the thing, Like, do you need to know Shazam's politics.
I do.
I'm not voting until I hear from Shazam.
It's so weird. Even the whole thing was like Chapel Roane. Oh, I love Chapel Roone, but I am not looking to her for advice on who to vote for.
A lot of people are, I mean, And she seems to be making a lot of good points and very good points. Uh yeah, I'm like basically on her side. But it's like she shouldn't have to deal with this in any way.
It's so weird. It's just like leave her alone. Like I don't. I'm sort of baffled by it. Yet, I guess to me, is like, Okay, that's the That might be one of a handful of people whose I think, whose voices are so you know, have such broad appeal that they could really affect things.
Affecting local economies. Yes, exactly, I think that that's the.
T there's college courses being taught about you somewhere. Yes, absolutely, yes, But I mean I don't just like leave her, leave Chapel alone, Like, leave her alone. She's great. Yeah, she's asked for that she's asked to be left alone.
Leave her alone to make so, I mean, and for that feeling for her to have already started.
Already it's been like three months, right.
But this early in her career. Oh, it's not going to get any better.
But I think that's reflective of where we are where. It's like her assent has been so quick, genuinely so fast, and the sort of parasocial element of social media, and like it's just you know, people are so into her and they yet so quickly seem to demand answers about her politics, and that when they disagree with her, they want to like tear her to It's just so weird. It's so weird.
You wonder where these people were three months ago, three months what was happening in their brain politically, literally three months ready to be activated.
It's so nuts, it's so nuts. I hope she's well.
I think she will. I mean, she's at least making the moves to be to protect herself. Yes, I'm sure there are a lot of people in her life that are like, stop doing that.
Yes, I'm sure that too of that too. I love her, I'm really I'm very happy for her success. Yeah, of course she's exciting.
She's exciting, she's saying whatever she wants.
She's got a great voice, great voice. People like forget that. I think when they get excited about musicians or they get they have some sort of they develop that sort of parasocial or obsessive relationship the fandom of it all. But it's like she has a really unique voice. Like I'm a singer and I can recognize in her voice that she does like yodels. She has yodeling in her voice.
Interesting cracks at the top of.
Her tone when she hits these high notes and there's a little yodel at the top, And I'm like, that is awesome. We haven't heard that since like Alanis Morris.
Wow, what an interesting Yeah, Lenea.
She she can sing at the top of a register where it cracks, but she uses it to her benefit. It's part of her technique. And I'm like, that is so it's so special and new.
And do you think that's on purpose?
Oh yeah, definitely, yeah, No, definitely on purpose. It's just her. It's just her style of like there's I feel like because of in this sort of twee Zoe dationell era of it all, like that the sort of like how would you describe it, the like whisper saying that like sort of like Caucasian Billie Holiday, you.
Know that sound like a bike corn, what a bike horn bike corn?
But that became like that sort of led into the ether a little bit and like became quirky, right, and then we've sort of I don't know, there's always been like there's always been melisma, which is riffing.
Oh I've never heard the word melisma.
Yeah, it's like you know, you know, like Mariah Whitney, Aretha, Like there's always been that. But the sort of patterns of what is popular in pop music sort of ebbs and flows, but that always stays the same or at least since like the eighties, I would say, you know, like that's been persistent. But with someone like Chapel, she has a distinctive vocal technique that.
I just find so exciting because it's different, right, and probably because it's difficult to do it can't become.
Popular, definitely difficult. Definitely, Well you can do it easily and just be like h O T. You know, you can just do that. But she's just got a distinct technique when she sings like good Luck Babe. It's just like that's a hard song to sing, right.
So hard. I do want to hear that version of Hot to Go, which one kind of joddo it sound like a like a personal injury jingle.
There's a guy on Instagram. This is a terrible to say, just like on a podcast when I don't even know his name. Oh, I shouldn't even say it. There's a guy on Instagram who's found a niche in singing pop songs like b Arthur, Oh my God, and it's glory. It brings me so much joy. It's glorious.
But see, this actually will probably benefit him because there'll be a bunch of listeners being like, it's this guy. Then they're going to be lighting up the comments. Oh, I think he's gonna be getting more buzz. I hope building buzz for this guy.
I mean it's and it's not just like he's doing b Arthur. He's doing like Darthy's born a like talk singing about it's so it's so like, it's so for me, you know, it's.
So for me.
I'm so happy about it.
I saw a Vanity play the other day that said D's bornac really it's great, which is great, but also a little I'm like, I'm not quite sure what we're communicating somebody that I love that.
Yeah, I'm like such a Golden Girls, you know, fanatic that I have b Arthur on my.
Arm, be on my arm. That's oh wow, that's beautiful Arthur there.
But yeah, she's it's a big part of my life. I would say, do.
You play Connections? Oh yeah, this morning, You've got to play this morning?
Oh wow, Oh I'm excited.
There's a real uh I guess maybe a red herring. Oh the Golden Girls.
Okay, so just be prepared. Okay, I'm gonna look out because it's gonna it's gonna say Dorothy Blanche.
That is what I'll say, Okay, and.
Its lie.
It can be very, very sneaky.
They're very sneaky on connection.
Sometimes I feel like you should be able to make your case.
Yes, you'd be like, well, but.
This actually does connect, and unfortunately you have to let me have it.
I agree. It's sometimes they're but that's you know, they're they're playing close to the vest, extremely close. It's a little it's a little rude, but I guess I wouldn't expect otherwise from the New York Times. It's a little snooty, a little tricky.
You never quite know where it stands. It might surprise you in bad ways.
What do you feel? How do you feel about the news? I don't know what you call it? What it's called squiggle it's not called squiggles.
I don't know this one, but I like that could be in the next game.
It's like kind of like word banky oh man, I forget wait.
Is kind of almost like a word search. Yes, I've played this one. Anything that comes close to a word search, I'm out.
I'm into it. Okay, I'm into it.
There's a there's that element of just uh, finding a word among letters that write bugs men.
But there's a there's an element in encouraging you to make words, and then when you get when you find enough words that are actual words, that's a hint to help solve the rest of the puzzle, which are thematically themed span gram that's what it's called.
Do you get kind of like coins almost that you can use.
To essentially, Yeah, essentially I could.
Give it another shot. Yeah, I'm doing connections, I'm doing the mini crossword and.
What's your order? In all four hours, and what do you do? Which ones do you do? And what's the order?
I do connections first. Okay, connections. You really don't know how much time it's going to do.
That's why I do it last.
Oh interesting, Yeah, I spend almost all of my mental energy on connections, gotcha. And then I get into the mini crossword, which is essentially like a Highlights magazine level difficulty, and try to beat that out as quickly as possible. Sure, and then I'm on with my day, which is just doing nothing right.
So you don't touch letterbox or whatever it's called.
Now letterbox reds the movie review webs.
Actually I'm forgetting on the red one.
The red one.
I'm not familiar with that one where you like connect letters and you have to make a word, but that word has to only have one of each essentially one of each letter in it.
Is that like spelling B?
No a yellow one? I know colors?
Oh yeah, it's spelling B. Of course they want it to be kind of honey. And yes, the red one I'm not even familiar with.
Yeah, it's like kind of like you're kind of a connecting it actually is letterboxed letterbox.
Wow. But what is the app? There is a D, but there's no E. It's Letterboxed without the E, and New York Times is with an E.
Yes, there's got to be a suit.
I'm happy class action. I don't know what it is.
There's legally is waiting to be This is an unfurled here.
You're seeing the effects immediately, of course. Yes, I'm getting my games and my reviews by straight men mixed up. It's very difficult to keep track up. Yeah, okay, so I'll have to look into letterbox I've looked.
I love it.
I love letterboxed all just guessing words.
I love Letterboxed. I've never used the app letter Boxed. I've never used that app. But I play the game.
I've browsed the apps and never played the game.
Yeah, play the game. Got to get I don't touch the crossword puzzle really, not even the mini. The mini I can kind of. It just makes me feel so stupid when I don't figure out the mini too quickly. Oh okay, the big ones, I'm just like, I'm an idiot. I'm out of here. I need like letters and colors.
Well, the big one is a project. It's not a object. It is a project. It's hours long, yes, and I just don't. I mean, I absolutely have the time. Yeah, and well maybe not the energy, right, but I'm not getting into that.
Yeah, that's fair.
Well, there is something we should get into that's probably a little bit more important and probably equally is confusing. And the podcast is called I said no gifts. I was naturally looking forward to having you here today. I thought, Ellie, it'll come by. He'll bring the dog. I haven't even mentioned to the listener yet that your dog most is glorious dog. So that's a fun surprise for everybody's They probably felt his presence.
Oh yeah, for sure.
I was really excited to have you here, and so I was a little bit Yeah, I don't even know what the word is at this point. I had to tamp down some feelings.
Yeah.
When I saw you walk into my backyard holding a beautiful gift bag that I immediately assumed was for me, I didn't want to, you know, I try not to assume too often. Sure, I thought, why would anyone give on a Lisa gift? Okay, And so I thought, of course.
It's for me.
I mean, do you have anything to say about this?
Or it is for you? Okay, do you want to know what it is?
I mean, do you want me to open it? Here on the podcast, you can open it. Okay, okay, we're getting into the beautiful gift bag.
I will say.
Yeah, it's got these little tasteful penguins wearing party hats, little party hats. I draw a lot of parts when I'm doodling. Anytime I doodle a character, there's like a nine out of ten chance that I'm going to draw a party hat on top.
Oh.
Really, it's a little secret to doodlers. Oh interesting, I had a unique element to your day.
Yeah. I love that.
It's an easy thing to draw.
Yeah, I only draw faces.
Well, the face can have a party had.
I'm going to put a party had on a face.
Okay, I'm opening.
Oh in the ribbon's part of the bagh.
Okay, we're pulling this out.
Oh late.
It's the book Ladies Who Punch The explosive inside story of the View. Yes, I will eat this up.
Yes, it's by Ramen Situta, and it is uh quite a read.
Why did you bring this here today?
Because it's the it's a great book, and you deserve a great book. You need a good read. I'm assuming.
Oh, I've actually been in the I've been in the market for a non fiction easy to read, you know, to page Turner.
An expose and exposed. I love this will do it, This will do it. There's a lot of Rosy, which is Rosie. Then I think subsequently said that she was the biggest mistake of her like like the biggest book. Whoopy said nothing because she's not involved. Oh yeah, because they watched the show every day, every single day.
They put on the cover and Whoop is on the cover.
Yeah, well, what could you do? I mean, whoop be, Barbara Walters and Rosie are on the cover and who else?
I mean did they talk to I mean they've talked to Liz Hasselback.
They talked to Liz Hasselback. There's Debbie, Matt Napolis. I think, oh, definitely is this I mean Star Jones.
Of course, does Barbara Walters?
I God, I don't remember.
Well, if they didn't get Barb I forgot what was I think it might have been written after she passed. Okay, I think let's say I'm saying quotes from her.
Yeah, I mean, if not, then she definitely had some you know, had to be part of it right, you got it. You know you can't not talk to Barbara. But Whoopee certainly Whoodby. I'm a huge you know, view fan and like one of the most I think it's it's baffling parts of the show is how Whoopee is there but seems to hate the job okay, and when she's asked about it sort of off the air, like in press or whatever, or in interviews, she literally is like, it's just my job. I show up and I do my job. But she really seems to not just do the job but have like but resent the.
Show, public contempt for this.
She's so interesting to me, it's so weird.
Helicopter has been there for a while. I think that the criminal is in the backyard and she's probably been there.
She's been there for very so long. She's been there for so long. I think twenty years.
Is after Barbara Walters. Is she the longest?
Oh?
I would what? I is that right? Maybe joy might be heavy since I think she was fired briefly, but but yeah, who no, No, I think Joey's probably been there a little bit longer.
Do we know the shortest tenure, the.
Shortest tenure, I would guess would be Abby. Uh, I forget her last name, Bobby. She's the daughter of a politician, Abby Huntsman.
Abbie Huntsman. Now, is she the daughter of John Huntsman? Yes, the Utah politicians.
Yes, that's right.
How was that?
That's right?
I grew up in Salike and that family's name is all over everything.
She's a Huntsman.
They donated to all kinds of things, I'm sure, and they're Mormon, but I think they were kind. I mean, I think, by nature of being ultra wealthy and kind of of the world, was probably a little more moderate or something maybe.
I mean, she's she's very she was very like TV friendly, but kind of kind of cold. And they tried to make her sort of like the softer antidote to Megan McCain. Okay, and it just didn't. She just wasn't particularly interesting, I would say, right, you know, she tried to be I think a little more moderate, but right, it wasn't really interesting.
And the view there's not that m for my behavior.
Yeah, although they're Republican now is fantastic.
What's this person's name?
Her name is Alissa Alyssa. Oh, Okay, she's great, she's like she's a Republican, but she's like very intelligent. She worked for Trump, which is wild. She worked in that White House and speaks so poorly of it, okay, but not in a way where you feel like she's like thirsty.
Interesting.
She left because of you know, January sixth, right, which is in my opinion, a little too late, But okay, you know, I mean, of course, there's always that underlying question of like why were you there? How could you be there in the first place if you have like functioning brain cells, you know, or like as long as you were, But she does seem like a very decent person, okay. And I don't know, I just I like her vibe.
She's got some skeletons in her closet.
Maybe, but she's also just like she she has the sort of Republican answer to everything in a sort of in a in a benefit of the benefit of the doubt in her way or not even not even Devil's advocate. Like. She tries to be pretty fair minded, and I appreciate it.
Tries to make you understand how someone could believe these I think, so, yes, which I well, I assume is valueable.
I mean, I guess, but it's also like the reason that I'm obsessed with the show, and I've only been watched it obsessively since our do you know Michelle Collins? Oh course, I love Michelle, Love Michelle, and she when she went back on When she went on the show is when I started watching.
Oh this so it's a pretty recent thing. It's not like you started watching in middle school.
No no, no, no no, that's pretty recent. But when I started watching with Michelle, I was baffled by a that her joke, her incredible lightning fast humor was like lost on the audience.
Tough place to be.
But that's where I got so baffled because it was like, how is that happening in New York? Like I just didn't get it. And subsequently I realized that the show with and without Michelle is like a it's like always always, always on the verge of utter chaos, always always in the verge of utter chaos, if not fully there.
That they've been able to keep it on for this long I know, And it's interesting.
It has a really interesting take on politics because they they all have different interests, but they're good at like digesting politics in a way or dissecting politics in a way that is broad. But yet again it's always in the verge of chaos because the audience seems completely like not there. They're like baffled or clueless. It's so weird, that's my question. And the leader of the you know, the sort of MC whoopee who is like insistent upon being the moderator and like, you know, really hurting the crew, I guess you would say, is again, like you said, contemptuous for being there and her often her job there is breaks the fourth wall.
Oh, she's speaking to the viewer at home.
It's not that, it's that she talks about what's going on on the production. Oh, while the show is on. Who so she like gets mad at the producer for telling her to rap. She talks to the control room without explaining that she's talking to the control room. She's like mad at the teleprompter. It is baffling. It is truly like and what's I mean. That's what's so interesting is that it's a successful morning show in a world where every other like the formula of a morning show is that sort of like squeaky, squeaky clean, right, you know, shiny happy exactly like a very like contained vibe and this show is on the verge of chaos at all times times. I don't know, you should watch it.
Have you seen any big fights?
It's not even that, that's the thing. It's not even the like Megan and Megan would have fights with Joy or Megan would have fights with Whoopee. And during COVID there's Zoo. The show on Zoom was off the like just off the rails, truly off the rails. But back in the studio there's not really fights per se. But that's what's interesting. When it gets heated, it feels very real and awkward, which is like, again, very different from any political round table show anything, Right, So that's what that it's it sort of has that electric electricity to it. And then I genuinely like lose interest when they veer into like guests or pop culture. It's like the more they talk about politics or themselves, the more interested I am.
What time does it air.
The LA It's eleven, Okay, I mean I watch you at night? Oh interesting, yeah, yeah, I watch your hour. Yeah, certainly after hours. It's actually your former your former guest HLN Scott, my dear friend. I'll send him like you know, like ten or eleven at night. I'll be like, what is what be you talking about? Because he watches too, and I'm like, what is she Because she'll say things. She will literally say things in gobblygook word cell that refer to things that you don't I don't even know what she's talking about, you know, like she's trying to make a point but referencing things that we aren't aware that she's referencing zero context, zero context, and so it's and it gets very like ambiguous. So it's just so confusing. When she's like, I have to make a point. She gets mad too because she needs she's a moderator, so she gives the question or the topic exactly, and she gets really mad when they don't get back to her in time, which is when she gets indignant with the producers in the control room at the camera. So weird. It's so weird. It's like, but you're on a live TV show and you've been doing this for so long. I'm figure it out?
Have you?
How have you not figured it out yet? It's so and again I only say that knowing that that is just her on she was on broad City, right, she did a walk on on Broad City and I went there on I wasn't on or writing or anything that day, but I had to go meet her and she was so like. Meeting her was like, oh, this is why she's It's not just that she's, you know, a great actress. It was like she exudes the kind of charm and warmth that like you don't you don't find every day, and I didn't I had. I mean, I met her so briefly and then I was in here and makeup and just saying goodbye to my sister and Abby and just you know, leaving and I was like nice and Whoopy was there and I was like nice to me, and she's like because I gave a Lon and Abby hugs as I do, right, And She's like, I don't get a hug.
And I was like, oh my god, for a celebrity to ask for the hug for whoopee wow.
Oh whoopy yes wow. No I get a hug. Like if we're hugging, I get the hug.
Of course.
I get to embrace you like she is. She is, that is her where you're just like, oh you are her charm and warmth and likability as a person is so contagious.
That.
I think that's probably that can't have not you know, attributed to her success.
You know.
Yeah, But again, that's what's so interesting is like watching her on the view, you can see her connect with people in that way, but then at the same time she seems like she you know, like hell, hath no fury or whatever when it comes to her being wrapped. You know, I'm trying to go to a break and she's like, no, no, I'm going to say this. She gets mad when they play the music over her. It's like, it's so funny. It's like every day is day one. It's hilarious.
Do you have any good things to share from this book, any nice little gems about the don't?
I mean, honestly, it's just about it is about like Elizabeth Hasselback and Barbara Sparring. Oh, that's the most interesting part of it.
I'm, of course on Elizabeth's side in every situation.
Well, I think you'll be even more so on her side when you read What Happened Back?
Wait, is that actually true? Oh yeah, Oh, I mean I'm not on her side in any situation.
I mean me either, But like when you read the book and you see the way that she was sort of I don't know the way that I hate to say I'm manipulated, but Okay, despite having zero in common with her as a person or her politics, I can understand why she would be so upset, right and feel so maligned when you read the context about what was going on, because Barbara was a shark, and like as much as she seemed like a you know, she was like the real gold standard of journalism, she's also a shark and like the producer in her is so real. And that's what you'll get from the book.
Oh, I loved it.
So interesting.
Oh, I'm very excited.
Yeah, I loved it.
I mean, as far as Rosie goes, I feel like Rosie history is finally correcting itself about Rosio dom you think, so, I feel like she's coming back out on top.
How so.
I feel like there were some years in the wilderness where people were like, you know, she's difficult, blah blah blah, and now I feel like the public is like, no, Rosie's right almost all the time. She says what she wants. Yes, and we also loved her in the nineties. I think that's correct, and it's nice to see kind of a correction.
I think that's correct. I think it's like her wisdom and her sort of like relatability has returned right on TikTok. I mean, I don't use TikTok, but she I see stuff she reposts on Instagram. Right, it's very boomer sure, not sure how to use technology. But I love her. I love her poetry. I loved her blog when she had a Paiku blog.
I didn't know she had a blog.
She had a Rosie had a Haiku blog. Love that. I love her. She grew up a town, a town next to me. I'm the Island, So I just it's my experience with her as a kid, and watching the show pretty religiously was interesting because it felt so close, right because of her accent, because it was in New York, because this yeah, and it was like, I'm I was like a closeted kid who was like into theater, and they she had theater on the show. It was just all very coated, you know, she wasn't out. But and of course I'm like a gay kid, and I'm like, yeah, she loves Tom Cruise, you know, loves Tom Cruise.
She loves that guy.
He's so hot, he's so sexual and hot. He's so sexual, exudes sexual. It's like what you know. But I think time has has worked on her side. Where you're right, there was like a valley and now she's like returning to a peece of some kind.
Right, I'm very happy for her.
She could be. She could honestly do anything she wants.
She really could. And she honestly is a great actor, great actor, excellent actor.
She does Howard Stern's show occasionally because they were Howard was relentless to her in the nineties, very mean. Oh I didn't know this, yeah, and they and so she was scared of him m because he was a scary man, right, And then I became a huge Howard fan once he started doing like psychotherapy and became very, very, very evolved. And people don't know that because right, because this reputation proceeds. Yes, absolutely, but he's so evolved. He's so a huge advocate for queer LGBT, like he's on the right side of things. You never know if you didn't listen. But he has rose on because they're now friends. She is such an interesting guest because she's so smart.
Oh, she's incredibly intelligent, incredibly intelligent and yeah.
I guess so is he so smart?
I mean, whenever he would be on Letterman or at least like later years, I'd always be like, oh, these are such fast interviews.
Oh. I mean he's he's a brilliant guy, you know, and he can play you know, he can play it off as being like, well, I'm into like toilet humor and stuff. But he's also an incredible interviewer and the show is has levels that levels of depth that I can't even describe in words that you can. He can do toilet humor, really raunchy toilet sex humor, and then in the next breath be interviewing Bruce Springsteen and it's like a transcendent interview.
How long does that show go on each day? Is three hours?
He does three days a week and it's usually four hours.
Do you listen to the whole thing?
I have to break it up.
That's a lot of.
If I'm like a in a writer's room, like I really get behind right of course. But if I'm not and I'm like doing my own thing, you know, I can I listen. I mean I also listen to like repeats and old episodes constantly. I've done the wrap up show for stern a Bunch and I just I'm so into it. Wow.
Yeah, And he used to be five days a week? Is that true?
God, I don't know.
Is there a period where people or listening to twenty hours of him a week?
I think probably when he was on terrestrial radio okay, when he went to Sirius in the like mid two thousands. He I think that's when he switched to three days a week. Oh okay, because he could could do whatever he wants.
Honestly, yeah, of course he can. I mean, he's why do anything exactly, So do whatever you wants.
Of course.
Do you have any interest in being in the live audience of the view.
Not particularly. I don't know, I really don't. It's really like, honestly, it's like it's better observed from behind the TV screen. That being said, Just to sort of dovetail this conversation together, there is an amazing clip of that somebody took in the audience at the view when Rosie was on, and she's she can't help but engage with the audience, like standing and talking to them, and she starts talking about her nine to eleven conspiracy theories. It's like in a commercial break people are like making her up, you know, and she's like, you know, faya can't melt steal that just can't happen or whatever, you know, metal, whatever the conspiracy is. Yeah, she's like, she's she's in deep her and of all people in the world. Character actress Christine Ebersol, I know that name. She's let me look, she's an actress. I don't know how else to describe her. She's like a you'd know her face. Yeah, I'm pretty sure her actress. She's on I think she was on SM only eighties briefly.
Of course, she's a huge imagine her. I mean I can this is one thing I'll say. I can see her rapidly clicking a mouse at a computer. Yes, exactly, and that makes sense.
Of course. What kind of computer though, you think a laptop or.
This is a I mean it's not even a flat screen coming out exactly.
It's a massive it's a massive desktop computer.
And she was looking like this.
I love it. She doesn't know she's like on FaceTime. I'm I'm I love it. Boomer boomers and computers are It's my favorite thing in the world.
Fascinating combination of worlds.
I'm obsessed my mom, My mom. I'm like, I'm like, she got the iPhone sixteen and I'm like, what are you doing? What are you doing? She has literally ruined relationships by texting diatribes that are misspelled and like unwanted. She has ruined relationships. And I've said, I'm like, if I had one wish, it would be that her iPhone every time she touched it turned into a Nokia a flip phone. That it was basic, basic, basic, basic, you know, qualities, just calls, maybe some T nine but that's it, right, right.
Was there ever a period when she was signing her texts Mom.
Oh yeah, it was there. You mean yes? My dad does that still, which we've said, like, Dad, you don't need to do this, and he's like, I know, he knows better. I think it's so cute. But he also hasn't he doesn't have the same relationship with technology that my mom does. For my mom's is like I can see her anxiety spilt, you know, spern not spurn spiral out right, the way she has many so many apps open, She's on so many websites. She has a ton that are on her home screen on her phone. Even though they're just links to Facebook.
She opens a new one every time she wants to get into.
Facebook correct and puts on her home screen instead of like bookmarking, it's it's it's wild and like, I don't Facebook scares the Jesus out of me. It's so scary. But I will go on every now and then to just make sure that she hasn't posted anything. You know, it's all like you know, it's all far left, sure, the liberal boomer stuff, but sometimes you just want to.
Be like, no, not this, not this, this one's wrong, not this untrue.
I think also because of Facebook, she says to us, now love you to the moon and back, and my sister and I are like, you never said this? Come back? Like where did you? She's not she's not a home goods you know.
She saw that on a pillow on Facebook's.
But that's what I mean. It's like, she's not a she doesn't have anything in the house, has like kissed the cook or like always kiss me good night. But because of Facebook, I think she's seen enough that she's like, love you to the moon and back.
We've got to find out where that came from.
I I well, I also don't want to know. Part of me wants to know, but part of me is like, just let that be a mystery.
Wow, somebody's got to write a book on the beginning of love you to the moon and back, because whoever that is is a fascinating place.
So, I mean, I still remember a friend of mine when we were younger, her parents, her mom had all those platitudes or like on like drift fake drift food or whatever, and she hung a sign over the toilet that said always kiss me good night, and we were like, here, here.
That's the only place that right, here's the toilet, the toilet, get in bed.
Awful. I those spook me out.
They're very odd, very odd, meaningless.
But that's what's so spooky at them is that people adopt them as like meaning and they're meaningless. Yes, they're meaningless. Oh what is it?
Oh?
My favorite one that I saw was like in Nana's house, you can.
We've got to set some boundaries.
For disaster.
I mean, I feel like those are kind of belong to boomers, and I think for millennials it's the pink neon sign, which is just.
Like the podcast background now right, wild drugs or whateverage, Right, savager, get it, get it, yeah, girl boss so odd.
I'm trying to figure out if gen Z if there are any signs of their future humiliation, and.
They're like, it's your fault. You're wrong, you're right, you are wrong about this, and this is why, this is why you're canceled. It's so weird. Yeah, that that that you're right, that neon pink sign is petrifying. It's absolutely really, you're right. It's like the millennial version of like boomer rustic driftwood, inspirational driftwood.
You want to feel like you're at the ace, you know, when you're like eighty years old.
It's why my first like writing drop that was hard comedy was on New Girl. Oh sure, and in my office as like a bit, I bought so many of those pieces of shitty driftwood and hung them. It was I guess you could say it's like art. I hung, like no joke, like twenty five of them because I think it's so funny that the chaos of all these empty platitudes coming together, where it's like they're already meaningless on their own, but seeing you know, live, laugh, love, you know, dance like no one's watching. Always kiss me good night. Seeing that all in one place is like exhausting.
I imagine they start to fight each other. They do. They're like, how can I piece of life together? You don't know what?
How to find a personality from all of this. It's too much.
It's whiplash, a fractured person. Yes, wow, credible, Well I think we should. It's time to play a game. Okay today I think it's a gift Master on releas. Oh, I'm good. I need a number between one and ten from.
You, Okay, so I can say it. Yes, Okay, I'll say six.
Okay. I need to do some like calculating with your number right now to get our game pieces. Okay, so you can promote, recommend, do whatever you want with the microphone.
I'll be right. Okay, I'm here. The shows that I would would be promoting will have happened prior to this airing. They will have been in Cleveland, Indianapolis, and Chicago. But if you go to my website or my Instagram or my link tree, you'll find dates for future shows once those are made available. Also here in the backyard today is Moses, my dog, who is a perfect boy, the perfect boy, and You're also welcome to go to my Instagram to see pictures of him and now Bridges back on the mic.
Beautiful Moses was not booked on the podcast, so for the promotion here, it's kind of gross.
He's the best.
No, we'll have to take a picture with him. Are going to be furious.
I know he's he's honestly, he is. I'm obsessed with him. It's not good.
He's beautiful. What kind of dog is he?
Well, he's a rescue, so I don't know for sure. But every animal that every breed that I've looked at called low chen. Oh and I've never heard of low chen. That is him. Okay, he is a low Chen to the max to the max lo Chin to the max and uh, not to brag, but he is a volunteer at the Children's hospital. Now my heart, he is perfection.
Oh that's so sweet.
He's a perfect boy.
I always feel a twinge of guilt when I ask somebody what kind of dog their dog is, because I obviously am rescue only. Oh I mean, but I always feel like, do they think that I'm I run a puppy meal? Like there's a brief second where I'm like, oh, they're gonna assume that I'm like some sort.
Of no not although do I have time to tell you a little a little anecdote. Of course. I ran into a guy who I went out with a couple of times. It was two was too many, one was too many, and he was like, and I was at how his dog was. His dog was named Prada, which I should have you know, I should have known, biggest possible, should have known. And he said, well, Prada died because vets. Prada was a French bulldog. Prada died because vets see French bulldogs and they see cash. And he said a vet killed the dog and now he's suing the vet. What And I felt immense remorse for that. I don't know what to say. And then before I could even really offer condolences, he said, but my next dog is going to be a furry frenchie. And I was like, what's a furry frenchie. He's like, they're French bulldogs, but they're furry, and he said it's either that or a new car. And I had to restrain, I mean genuinely, like I had to restrain all my inner like like pan sexual. I'm not pan sexual, but like my pan sexual vibeness, you know, the sort of pan rescue only, adoption only, uh crunchy vibes and just just bite my tongue and nod without like choking him. Oh what are you doing? What are you doing? Those dogs can't breathe.
Man, he's going to get a furry French you name it g wagon. Oh, just be prepared world.
Can you imagine Prada?
Awful?
Those are your values?
Oh that makes me sick to my stomach.
Meanwhile, I have, like I poured so much over what I was going to name Moses, because when you're a writer comedian, like, you're gonna want to be very careful, and to be very careful, there's you could go too quirky, you could go to banal, you get caught up in a trend. You can get caught up in a trend. And for me, it was either I think it was gonna be Figaro, Yeah I love Figaro or fig Tait. But he was rescued in Palm Springs, So I say he was Moses because he was wandering in the desert.
Yeah, of course you found him in a basket.
He's very biblical, very sweet.
Well, let's play the game. Here, I'm gonna name three celebrities, and I'm gonna name three gifts, and you're gonna tell me which gift you would give which celebrity, and what does that make perfect sense?
Okay?
The celebrities today are Number one Marissa Tomey okay, who I saw friends and Family a couple of years ago. It was very exciting.
She's beautiful, gorgeous, gorgeous.
Excellent actor too, and they've got her playing Spider Man's aunt.
I don't get it, just like what fest Okay, the world we live in?
Number two Cynthia Arrivo.
Oh yes.
Number three Scarlet Johansson. Okay, we've got an all ladies brunch today. The gifts you're giving away our number one a job at the mall. It's a nice job, and it could be kind of any job at the mall. True, they've got all kinds of jobs there. Number two sleepless Nights could be turned into a productive gift. And number three official merch.
Yes, oh wow, Well, I mean I feel like the natural inclination would be to give Scarlett Johanson official merch because she's like a superhero whatever.
Oh interesting, she's part of the Marvel universe.
Yeah, but I think Marissa Tomey is just under the radar enough. She's not under the radar, but just left of center enough and underappreciated enough that she needs merch. I would.
Like her.
I can imagine there being bootleg Marissa merchres, which I wouldn't want. No, she was selling things with her name and face on it. Yeah, do you think it would be incredible cool or like, like, how do you think her the merch would be tastefully i'd be would I think I would want it to be slightly not tasteful enough?
Yes, I like some mistakes for that's what I think. Like the font would be just a little too predictable, not comic sands, not curly cues or whatever, but something where you're just like, eh, copper played gothic. Come on, you know you can do it something a little, you know.
With a free font pack or something exactly.
You could have you could have splurged. But so I would give official merch to to Mursy tome perfect and then a drop of them all on sleepless nights. Honestly, like Cynthia or Evo is so she always is like so good at fashion, and I know nothing about fashion, but I know that she like she serves as as they say. Of course it sounds homophobic coming out of my mouth. She's serving, But she would thrive in any job at any store in the mall. I could see her at Talbots, for God's sake, she would.
She'd just be approached by Cynthia.
Talbots, what with the nose with the septum ring in Point me to the dressing room and I want something in a I want something floral in a missy, a duster, a floral length duster. And then I guess sleepless nights, I would say to Scarlet Johansson. Not because I wish ill on her. I don't wish sleepless nights and anybody. But I hate to admit it, but I think Colin Joe's is so handsome that I would be okay with, like just like looking for eight hours.
Wow, he's a fascinating pick, Colin. Yes, I know, a free font packs. I feel like someone for.
Her, you know, a demo of a man for her. Him, But you're saying it's a I mean.
As a good looking person. I feel like he's the demo of a good looking man.
Yeah, I don't know his teeth.
He's got a great yeah, and I don't want to say anything. He's a very just kind of everything's right. Yes, everything right can work in certain situations, work against a person.
Yeah, I think it could work against him too. I don't. I don't really get like why he's on TV. And I don't. I don't mean that because he's bad. He like, she's totally good at what he does.
He's not actively bad or anything, no, no.
But I'm just like he's just there. I don't know, he's just kind of like there again, I say it as in like he is totally good in service, completely completely, but he's I think he's so handsome. Guess that's why he's on TV. So handsy.
Yeah, just like if you were to flipping through the channels, you'd be like, of course there's a newscaster.
Yes, right, just just clean. He's so clean.
He seems he takes nine showers a day up, yeah, cleaned up.
Maybe a bath.
I can't see Colin jos in a bathroom getting there, no bath for no level of oil. Now you know there's a very clean shower. Jel scent that's sharp, yeah, not even woodsy.
You know, it's he's one of these guys who like he's from like Staten Island, and that's so analogous to he is so analogous to Staten Island that that is what fascinates me.
And I guess I don't know Staten Island enough to associate those two together. Doesn't make sense in my mind.
There is sort of like a I mean, I've encountered like a little bit of like waspy like intellectuals on Staten Island, but it's such such a small pocket interesting that you would never think it.
No, because for to me, it feels working class and very very variable what you assume of New York.
Yes, it is very removed even though it's there. It's like I'm from Long Island. It's the same, the same politics, the same like blue collar you know, intellect and anger at other people, like right, So it's so intense and it does not seem like Colin, you know, would come from that ilk.
He's running from something something. Well that was excellently played.
Yeah, thanks beautiful gifts.
Scarlett's just kind of not even blinking. She's just lying in bed staring at.
I'm like, and I'll do a body swap happily.
That's a great freaky Friday.
That's me and Scarlett Johansson.
She's possessed by a man who can't sleep and is obsessed with her husband. Okay, well it's uh. This is the final segment of the podcast is called I Said No Emails. People write into I Said No Gifts at gmail dot com. Every one of them has a nearly unsolvable problem complement their life, and they finally turning to the right source. Yes, we help me answer a question, of course, all right, this says hello, Bridger and guest. My apartment building has a habit of packages disappearing, and somewhere along the line, my neighbors started bringing up packages for me anytime they see them and setting them outside my door, likely rescuing them from thievery in the process. I try to return the favor as often as I can, but there is definitely an imbalance. I'm going to be moving out in a few months, and I'd like to thank them for their good deeds with a gift. There's a man, a woman, a child, and two cats in their apartment, but I know very little about them other than running into the woman once at Target as she was looking for Snickers ice cream bars. Please help me properly, thank them for being good neighbors. Thanks, And that's from Warren. Okay, what we know about Warren is that he has been getting the packages delivered him and assuming that no other that this neighbor's doing this for everyone else. Yeah, he also knows some alarming details about who's living in this apartment. Right, maybe he has too much of a role call. I would say maybe. And then he just happens to be at Target knowing exactly what this woman's buying.
I don't think that's crazy. Tomato, Tomato, you think that's crazy.
I'm just going to say it's bordering on Warren, How did you find out about the Snickers?
Because he probably spoke to her prying. Okay, Okay, there could be prying.
And I mean he barely sees these people. How do you even recognize her?
That's true, Well, you recognize your neighbors every now and then.
No, I don't know. It feels like the neighbor's trying to keep away from him. They're dropping the gift and like avoiding except for oh god, I had to go buy Snickers and now I'm running into.
War and the neighbor could knock on his door and deliver the right. But I don't know. I think this is like very polite and considerate of the neighbors. Okay, Okay, and Warren.
And interesting, right, so you're on everyone else's side, but me, I mean there's an immediate no.
I think. I think I'm on the neighbor's side. I do think, you know, if Warren could, I don't know. I don't know what the inmbound. I don't really understand the imbalance. Okay. Are there times where he chooses not to bring their gift to them?
Like maybe they're not ordering, they're not. That's the other thing we're learning here is Warren is deeply materialistic. He's ordering things NonStop, right, probably from a problematic retailer.
Right.
And these people, meanwhile, I live a very minimal life.
Right.
Their packages they get are probably homemade, yes, and probably you know, they're trying everything they can to keep their footprint as small as possible.
That's true.
He's blasting the ac in his apartment alone, definitely, windows probably open.
Oh god, I mean that's just he's.
Living this life that's out of control, right, and his neighbors are trying to Warren is on the verge. But I mean all of this, with all of this in mind, what to Sworren get these people?
Well, my first instinct was to say, a lovely handwritten card and a Target gift card. Oh, but when you made it so like it was creepy, it changed my thoughts about the Target gift card because it's like, this is how I know you from Target. Now you're my target now exactly, and now that creeping out. With that being said, I always think like a gift card to a restaurant, and if they have a kid, a gift card to a nice kid friendly restaurant. Perhaps a chain is a good way to you can't can't hurt to get to let people go to outback for one hundred.
Bucks, you know you can get all kinds of things that all kinds of stuffs.
Yeah, get a brownie Sunday, get a bloomin onion, a bloomin onion. I think that's a nice gesture. Even if it was just like fifty dollars. I still think a card with a thank you for being so considerate, right is the is the real gift there.
Now I will say about you have to be very careful with restaurant amounts on gift cards. If you give too little, you now put them in a trap where why if they want to go to that restaurant but they feel they need to correct and are going to be spending more.
That's right, but it's a family of three.
Family of three, so assume thirty three dollars for each person one hundred I think one hundred dollars. That's a nice night out at outpack and listen.
If they are on the frugal side, they can go twice.
They could go hundreds of times.
They could go for five onions and are right, although that might then kill them from heart attacks, and then it would be Warren's fault.
But at that point he might be looking for a vacant apartment.
He's moving well, he might be a back. Warren's back.
Warren's on the merge, warns and.
Takes their apartment, knocks down the wall he's got.
He expands, he rips the ceiling out, all in the plans, all along. Snickers ice cream bars are delicious.
No, I'm honest, I'm not a fan of caramel or milk chocolate.
This is a rough place for you to be.
Love, dark chocolate.
They should make a dark one, not a n ice cream. I don't think they make a dark Snickers.
Oh I could do that. I just don't like caramel. I'm not a huge candy bar person.
Okay, well, then this is not the cream bar for you.
I'm also like very annoying about ice cream. Oh, how so I'm over hard ice cream? I'm over it. I just want I just want soft.
Where are you getting soft ice cream?
Foster's Freeze?
Okay? Sure?
And then ultimately there's literally one place in El Segundo, and my friends will tell you I'm a absolute lunatic because I will travel quite a distance to get dessert, a good dessert. Sure, because it's important to me. Of course, there's a place called Dipped ice Cream, Oh el Segundo, Okay, where they have delicious soft serve that they dunk in shells.
Oh yeah, I'm very familiar.
I mean it is. You've been to this place?
No, I'm familiar with the dip because mister softy dip.
Of course.
In you Tah, there's a restaurant chain called Arctic Circle. And what they call this product when they dip it in chocolate is a brown topper.
Oh. Which that's not the right they do. Wow, that's a very innocent.
Wow, that's just an interesting fact. I like to from outside of Utah.
Sad whoa brown topper. That's a mistake that they could never have seen coming. I guess.
Yeah.
Wow tough.
Uh.
I don't know if they've changed it, but it's an interesting Uh.
Well, well, dipped ice cream is a huge brown topper.
And wait, what's theme of the place in El Segundo dipped dipped ice cream, kipped cone or something? Have you been to heavy Handed? This is also a drive. It's in Studio City.
Heavy Handed.
Now, it's the best soft service cream I've ever Oh my god, tell me everything. They only have three flavors I believe, chocolate, vanilla, and actually maybe just swirl. But it's so well made. I've never had soft served like this before. I'm like this, the care put into this product, I mean, it so unnecessary. They'll do a dip, they do multiple dips.
Okay, this is important to me.
Heavy handed, Yeah, heavy handed, delicious, absolutely wonderful ice cream cut that's on my rate are now it feels like soft serve is kind of making a swing back.
I feel like it is. I don't know. I don't know at what point I just lost interest in hard ice cream, but I just did. I just did, and I love because you know what it is, quite honestly, the ice cream is less about the ice cream and more about the dip, the brown topper, or I want, genuinely, I want an obscene amount of sprinkles, to the point that I can't even see the ice.
Cream colored sprinkles or chocolate sprinkle colored. Oh I love a chocolate sprinkle over an ice cream soft serve.
Give me both, but I want I don't want to see the ice cream. I don't want to see ice cream. I want to see sprinkles. And then I want extras to dip this, dip the ice cream into as you eat. Yes, I love the texture. The texture marriage there.
You really don't find a texture like sprinkles anywhere else in nature.
No, And you know, at these sort of bespoke places, even like Magpies, which is say, it's good, but they do that sort of like Whole Foods sprinkles that are not bright enough and they just kind of like dirizzaletle couple on and it's like no, no, no, this isn't a garnish. This is half the meal for me.
This is a protective shell from the ice This.
Is a protective shell. Give me the I don't want to see the ice cream, but they have those, like you know, lay mass sprinkles.
Right justice the toppings bar. There leaves a lot to be desired.
It's fun, It's like, oh, honeycomb, that's fun. But then it's like all right, all right, I get it. I'm going to Foster's Freeze, which we don't really have that like in New York. Like I feel like mister Softy out of the truck, which is perfection, but also like comes in exhaust like you comes in exhaust. There used to be tcby, which I was obsessed with it as a kid, But we don't really like New York, but especially like the northeastern region, even like New England. Hard ice cream is the stuff.
That's all you get.
That's all you get.
It's excellent made, but.
You hate it. I don't hate it. I'm just like don't like it. I could take it or leave it. Yeah, I could take it or leave it. Yeah, could take it or leave it. Give me I need That's why I mean, we never had like dairy what's it called dairy Freeze, Dairy Freeze, dairy Queen. We had actually on Long Island, we had someone called dairy Barn, which is like a drive through.
Oh.
I like it's so rustic sounding for the least rustic place on Earth. But they didn't have like ice cream or anything. It was just groceries that someone gave to you. Yeah, it's so weird.
I hope you could at least buy milk.
You could. That's what kind of what it was for.
That's what it started with. Unless you were John Tesh right by water and Flakes. Well, yeah, you support your soft serve journey.
Thank you.
I'm just kind of getting into it now. But I'm going to go to DiPT.
Yes, It's it's worth the trip. I'm a big fan.
I'm very excited about this, and I'm excited. I think you've kind of converted me to the View.
I think you're gonna like it.
This is the exact type of television I'm looking to.
What if, like in a week, you're like watching the View, listening to Howard Stern wearing your clothes. My clothes, by the way, I wore my short shorts because Alan h Allen my friend was talking about short shorts on this podcast, right and decrying them because he likes to wear his long sort of Billie Eilish, you know angle length capri, Yeah, Capri, pant Janko short shorts, and I wear mine with pride.
You've got to wear a short short.
I wear them with pride.
Everybody's got to get their legs out there.
I love that guy's show legs now. Oh of course the in seems you're getting higher and higher straight guys too, and I love it.
I think it's fight against the basketball short.
Fight against it. Paul Meskill like lead the.
Doing an incredible job.
He's doing a service, short service, all men, all men, Yes, I love it.
Fantastic. Everybody put on your short shorts. Watch the view that's eat brown topper.
I think nothing of it, like nothing is more to me, like when if I if you were to ask me about myself, to describe myself, like I never ever ever gave a shit about astrology, sign horoscopes, but the more you know, obviously I'm in la. All of course, my friends people are always into horoscopes. So I understand the idea that as a Gemini I have I could have two personalities. Oh sure, whatever, it is like just you know, twin personalities. And I used to like kind of like, you know, sort of wave it away as nonsense, and then in recent years it's like God, I listened to I worship like Howard Stern and like the view like this is these are my things that I'm oh, I can't miss, and it's like they couldn't be you know, further.
Apart, you're essentially two face.
I'm two face, So I guess that's it. I'm a Gemini. I'm a double Gemini, owned the Gemini. I'm owning it.
I support that. I'm a Libra and apparently it's the source of almost every one of my problems.
Okay, I mean at this point, I just it's you're in la. So what can you do except throw your hands up and go, okay, sure got me, you got me.
Well, thank you for the book. I'm going to be diving into this, maybe reading, then watching and then watching and then reading.
Oh yeah, very different from the book. The show is very different from the book that you're gonna that you're gonna read. In the Boo Book, Michelle, you're reading the book, but it's still delightful and chaotic, truly, truly late, it's chaotic.
I cannot wait. Well, thank you for being here, thank you for having me. I've had a delightful time. And listener, the podcast is over. We've heard so many helicopters today, and I hope you were keeping count at least seven. Well I was obviously wasn't keeping count. But the podcast is over. Get moving, do whatever you need to do. I love you, goodbye, I said, No Gifts is an exactly right production. It's produced by our dear friend Analise Nelson, and it's beautifully mixed by Ben Holliday. And we couldn't do it without our guest booker, Patrick Kottner. The theme song, of course, could only come from miracle worker Amy Man. You must follow the show on Instagram. At I said no Gifts, I don't want to hear any excuses. That's where you get to see pictures of all these gorgeous gifts I'm getting. And don't you want to see pictures of the gifts.
But I invited you here, thought I made myself perfectly clear.
But you're a guess to my home.
You gotta come to me empty, And I said, no, guess, you're own presences, presents enough that I already had too much stuff. So how did you dare to surbey me?
