Should we be making our children apologise when they do the wrong thing? What does a sincere apology look like?

In this episode:
Parental Guidance (S1): “Forcing children to apologise is teaching children to lie”
Victim mentality
People pleasing
Ruptured relationships
The Parenting Revolution, by Dr Justin Coulson
Motivation Continuum - extrinsic, introjected, identified, integrated, intrinsic
Is It Wrong to Tell Kids to Apologize? | The Atlantic
Theory of Mind
Why do children apologise under coercion?
Feeling seen, heard, and valued
Repairing relationships
Why don't kids want to apologise?
4 components of a sincere apology

Related links: 
Should we Force our Children to Say 'Sorry'
Carrots & Sticks: How Rewards and Punishments Hurt Our Kids, and What to do Instead [Webinar]

Doors are now open to the Happy Families Membership 

NEW weekly kids’ ‘Print & Play’ subscription FELT (Fostering Emotional Learning Together)

Find us on Facebook or TikTok

Subscribe to the Happy Families newsletter

Should we be making our children apologise when they do the wrong thing? What does a sincere apology look like?
In this episode:
<ul>
<li><a href="https://www.9now.com.au/parental-guidance/season-1">Parental Guidance (S1)</a>: &ldquo;Forcing children to apologise is teaching children to lie&rdquo;</li>
<li>Victim mentality</li>
<li>People pleasing</li>
<li>Ruptured relationships</li>
<li><a href="https://happyfamilies.com.au/shop/product/the-parenting-revolution">The Parenting Revolution</a>, by Dr Justin Coulson</li>
<li>Motivation Continuum - extrinsic, introjected, identified, integrated, intrinsic</li>
<li><a href="https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2024/05/should-kids-apologize-parenting-debate/678294/">Is It Wrong to Tell Kids to Apologize? | The Atlantic</a></li>
<li><a href="https://happyfamilies.com.au/articles/developmental-milestones-part-3-preschool">Theory of Mind</a></li>
<li>Why do children apologise under coercion?</li>
<li>Feeling seen, heard, and valued</li>
<li>Repairing relationships</li>
<li>Why don't kids want to apologise?</li>
<li>4 components of a sincere apology</li>
</ul>
Related links:&nbsp;
<ul>
<li><a href="https://happyfamilies.com.au/articles/should-we-force-our-children-to-say-sorry">Should we Force our Children to Say 'Sorry'</a></li>
<li><a href="https://happyfamilies.com.au/shop/product/carrots-sticks">Carrots &amp; Sticks: How Rewards and Punishments Hurt Our Kids, and What to do Instead [Webinar]</a></li>
</ul>
Doors are now open to the <a href="https://happyfamilies.com.au/membership">Happy Families Membership</a>&nbsp;
NEW weekly kids&rsquo; &lsquo;Print &amp; Play&rsquo; subscription <a href="https://happyfamilies.com.au/shop/product/felt-subscription">FELT</a> (Fostering Emotional Learning Together)
Find us on<a href="https://www.facebook.com/happyfamilies.au/"> Facebook</a> or <a href="https://www.tiktok.com/@happyfamiliesau">TikTok</a>
Subscribe to the Happy Families&nbsp;<a href="https://happyfamiliesfamilyeducation.activehosted.com/f/40">newsletter</a>

The Happy Families Podcast with Dr. Justin Coulson is designed for the time poor parent who just wants answers now. Every day Justin and his wife Kylie provide practical tips and a common sense approach to parenting that Mums and Dads all over the world are connecting with. Justin and Kylie have 6 daughters and they regularly share their experiences of managing a busy household filled with lots of challenges and plenty of happiness. For real and practicable advice from people who understand and appreciate the challenges of a time poor parent, listen to Justin and Kylie and help make your family happier.

The Happy Families Podcast with Dr. Justin Coulson is designed for the time poor parent who just wants answers now. Every day Justin and his wife Kylie provide practical tips and a common sense approach to parenting that Mums and Dads all over the world are connecting with. Justin and Kylie have 6 daughters and they regularly share their experiences of managing a busy household filled with lots of challenges and plenty of happiness. For real and practicable advice from people who understand and appreciate the challenges of a time poor parent, listen to Justin and Kylie and help make your family happier.

The Happy families podcast with Dr. Justin Coulson is designed for the time poor parent who just wants answers now.

Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

#1226 - Forcing Kids To Apologise (R)

https://api.omny.fm/orgs/fa326977-3de5-4283-9b8b-af3500c58607/clips/e9c0e719-1b44-45ae-8264-b2b8008d584a/transcript

The new year brings a reality check: what actually changed for parents last year - and what didn’t? In this high-energy episode, Justin and Kylie review last year’s big parenting predictions (AI, social media, homeschooling, boys, cost of living, and more), celebrate the surprising hits, admit the misses, and tee up what’s coming next. Fast, fun, insightful - and wildly relevant for every parent stepping into 2026.

KEY POINTS
Which predictions landed in 2025 (and why they mattered for families)
Where Justin was hilariously wrong (TikTok + travel = oops)
The AI-powered parenting revolution - now real, mainstream, and everywhere
Homeschooling’s massive surge and what’s driving it
The global social media crackdown led by Australia - and why the rollout is bumpy
Why boys still need more support - and the culture shift that hasn’t arrived yet
YouTube’s silent dominance and what it means for kids and screens
Cost of living, family strain, and the myth of intergenerational living

QUOTE OF THE EPISODE

“I was one hundred percent correct—AI has become a mainstream parenting assistant.”

RESOURCES MENTIONED
Skylight Calendar (meal planning + calendar tool)
8 Game-Changing Predictions for 2025 [Article]
Today Show segment on homeschooling statistics
Government announcements surrounding the under-16 social media ban

ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS
Audit your family’s tech habits, screen time, and parental controls
Explore AI as a support tool (homework, routines, meal planning)
Stay informed on school and homeschooling trends - more families are switching
Watch for changes in social media regulations and platform age limits
Prioritise conversations about boys’ wellbeing - academic, emotional, social

The new year brings a reality check: what actually changed for parents last year - and what didn&rsquo;t? In this high-energy episode, Justin and Kylie review last year&rsquo;s big parenting predictions (AI, social media, homeschooling, boys, cost of living, and more), celebrate the surprising hits, admit the misses, and tee up what&rsquo;s coming next. Fast, fun, insightful - and wildly relevant for every parent stepping into 2026.
KEY POINTS
<ul>
<li aria-level="1">Which predictions landed in 2025 (and why they mattered for families)</li>
<li aria-level="1">Where Justin was hilariously wrong (TikTok + travel = oops)</li>
<li aria-level="1">The AI-powered parenting revolution - now real, mainstream, and everywhere</li>
<li aria-level="1">Homeschooling&rsquo;s massive surge and what&rsquo;s driving it</li>
<li aria-level="1">The global social media crackdown led by Australia - and why the rollout is bumpy</li>
<li aria-level="1">Why boys still need more support - and the culture shift that hasn&rsquo;t arrived yet</li>
<li aria-level="1">YouTube&rsquo;s silent dominance and what it means for kids and screens</li>
<li aria-level="1">Cost of living, family strain, and the myth of intergenerational living</li>
</ul>
QUOTE OF THE EPISODE
&ldquo;I was one hundred percent correct&mdash;AI has become a mainstream parenting assistant.&rdquo;
RESOURCES MENTIONED
<ul>
<li aria-level="1">Skylight Calendar (meal planning + calendar tool)</li>
<li aria-level="1">8 Game-Changing Predictions for 2025 [Article]</li>
<li aria-level="1">Today Show segment on homeschooling statistics</li>
<li aria-level="1">Government announcements surrounding the under-16 social media ban</li>
</ul>
ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS
<ol>
<li aria-level="1">Audit your family&rsquo;s tech habits, screen time, and parental controls</li>
<li aria-level="1">Explore AI as a support tool (homework, routines, meal planning)</li>
<li aria-level="1">Stay informed on school and homeschooling trends - more families are switching</li>
<li aria-level="1">Watch for changes in social media regulations and platform age limits</li>
<li aria-level="1">Prioritise conversations about boys&rsquo; wellbeing - academic, emotional, social</li>
</ol>

A Year of Big Shifts, Big Lessons, and Big Surprises

https://api.omny.fm/orgs/fa326977-3de5-4283-9b8b-af3500c58607/clips/651bee79-afcc-4a16-a29a-b3cf000e5c7e/transcript

If the idea of playing Barbies or dragons makes you groan… you’re not alone.

In this episode, Justin and Kylie tackle a parenting confession that many are afraid to admit: “I don’t like playing with my kids.” Drawing from emotional intelligence research and real-life experience, they unpack why play matters (even if it’s not your favourite), how to make it meaningful and manageable, and why it’s one of the simplest ways to build connection, confidence, and emotional regulation in your child.

KEY POINTS
Play is not a luxury—it’s essential.
Play builds emotional intelligence, connection, and social skills better than almost anything else.
It’s not about doing it ‘right’.
Play works best when it’s spontaneous, simple, and mutually enjoyable—not when it’s forced or scripted.
The emotional impact is profound.
Play regulates emotions, reduces tension, strengthens relationships, and helps kids feel seen, heard, and valued.
The secret is in the interaction.
What makes play powerful is the back-and-forth: the jokes, the giggles, the shared creativity—not the activity itself.
A little goes a long way.
Just 5–10 minutes of intentional play can fill your child’s emotional cup and help them play independently afterwards.

QUOTE OF THE EPISODE

“Play is not about perfection—it’s about connection and presence.”

RESOURCES MENTIONED
Happy Families Membership – parenting tools & webinars
happyfamilies.com.au – resources for raising emotionally intelligent kids
Shift by Ethan Kross

ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS
Find a 5–10 minute window each day
You don’t need hours. Commit to short, fully present bursts of play—no phones, no multitasking.
Gamify the mundane
Turn routines into playful challenges: “Can you hop to the bathroom on one foot?” or “Let’s race to tidy up.”
Let your child lead
Ask: “How could we make this more fun?” Give them a sense of autonomy and watch their creativity bloom.
Prioritise connection over performance
You’re not there to entertain—you’re there to engage. Drop the pressure, enjoy the moment.
Repeat. Consistency is the win.
Over time, this builds emotional strength, stronger relationships, and memories that last.

If the idea of playing Barbies or dragons makes you groan&hellip; you&rsquo;re not alone.
In this episode, Justin and Kylie tackle a parenting confession that many are afraid to admit:&nbsp;&ldquo;I don&rsquo;t like playing with my kids.&rdquo; Drawing from emotional intelligence research and real-life experience, they unpack why play matters (even if it&rsquo;s not your favourite), how to make it meaningful and manageable, and why it&rsquo;s one of the simplest ways to build connection, confidence, and emotional regulation in your child.
KEY POINTS
<ul>
<li aria-level="1">Play is not a luxury&mdash;it&rsquo;s essential. Play builds emotional intelligence, connection, and social skills better than almost anything else.</li>
<li aria-level="1">It&rsquo;s not about doing it &lsquo;right&rsquo;. Play works best when it&rsquo;s spontaneous, simple, and mutually enjoyable&mdash;not when it&rsquo;s forced or scripted.</li>
<li aria-level="1">The emotional impact is profound. Play regulates emotions, reduces tension, strengthens relationships, and helps kids feel seen, heard, and valued.</li>
<li aria-level="1">The secret is in the interaction. What makes play powerful is the back-and-forth: the jokes, the giggles, the shared creativity&mdash;not the activity itself.</li>
<li aria-level="1">A little goes a long way. Just 5&ndash;10 minutes of intentional play can fill your child&rsquo;s emotional cup and help them play independently afterwards.</li>
</ul>
QUOTE OF THE EPISODE
&ldquo;Play is not about perfection&mdash;it&rsquo;s about connection and presence.&rdquo;
RESOURCES MENTIONED
<ul>
<li aria-level="1"><a href="https://happyfamilies.com.au/membership">Happy Families Membership</a> &ndash; parenting tools &amp; webinars</li>
<li aria-level="1"><a href="https://happyfamilies.com.au">happyfamilies.com.au</a> &ndash; resources for raising emotionally intelligent kids</li>
<li aria-level="1"><a href="https://www.penguin.com.au/books/shift-9781785044618">Shift</a> by Ethan Kross</li>
</ul>
ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS
<ol>
<li aria-level="1">Find a 5&ndash;10 minute window each day You don&rsquo;t need hours. Commit to short, fully present bursts of play&mdash;no phones, no multitasking.</li>
<li aria-level="1">Gamify the mundane Turn routines into playful challenges: &ldquo;Can you hop to the bathroom on one foot?&rdquo; or &ldquo;Let&rsquo;s race to tidy up.&rdquo;</li>
<li aria-level="1">Let your child lead Ask: &ldquo;How could we make this more fun?&rdquo; Give them a sense of autonomy and watch their creativity bloom.</li>
<li aria-level="1">Prioritise connection over performance You&rsquo;re not there to entertain&mdash;you&rsquo;re there to engage. Drop the pressure, enjoy the moment.</li>
<li aria-level="1">Repeat. Consistency is the win. Over time, this builds emotional strength, stronger relationships, and memories that last.</li>
</ol>

How Burnt-Out Parents Can Still Build Connection

https://api.omny.fm/orgs/fa326977-3de5-4283-9b8b-af3500c58607/clips/91bd0ebd-160c-4b71-b671-b3b300adef4d/transcript

Are your phone habits impacting your child’s growth?
 We all know kids and screens don’t mix well—but what about parents and screens? A compelling new study has uncovered a strong link between a mother’s screen time and her child’s developmental outcomes. In this Doctor’s Desk episode, Dr Justin and Kylie Coulson unpack the latest research on "technoference" and what happens to our children when our eyes are glued to our devices. The results may just change the way you use your phone—especially around your kids.

KEY POINTS:
Study Summary: Japanese research of ~4,000 mother-child pairs found that more than one hour of screen use by mums in front of their children correlates with lower language and social development.
Two Hours or More: Greater than two hours was associated with lower global development outcomes.
Technoference: The distraction of devices interrupts “serve and return” interactions—vital for healthy child development.
Modelling Matters: Kids mimic their parents—mums who use screens more are more likely to have kids who use them too.
TV vs. Devices: Passive screen time (TV) is less harmful than interactive, overstimulating device use—but still not ideal.
Screen Time ≠ Quality Learning: Despite nostalgic memories of “learning” from Sesame Street, research shows TV is a poor teacher compared to real-world engagement.

QUOTE OF THE EPISODE:

"Screens are a hollow imitation of real life... real development happens in person-to-person, face-to-face interactions."

RESOURCES:
The study published in Nature Scientific Reports (March 2025)
Unplugged Parenthood: Reducing Screen Time to Strengthen Family Connections [Article]
Happy Families website: happyfamilies.com.au

ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS:
Be Present: Put down your phone when you're with your child—especially in those early years.
Set Boundaries: Limit both your own and your child’s screen time with simple routines (e.g., no phones at the table or during playtime).
Model Mindful Use: Show kids what healthy tech habits look like—because they’re watching.
Prioritise Engagement: Make time for face-to-face chats, shared play, and reading together—real-life interactions build real brains.
Use Screens Intentionally: If you need a break, opt for TV over devices, and choose age-appropriate, narrative-driven content.

Are your phone habits impacting your child&rsquo;s growth? We all know kids and screens don&rsquo;t mix well&mdash;but what about parents and screens? A compelling new study has uncovered a strong link between a mother&rsquo;s screen time and her child&rsquo;s developmental outcomes. In this Doctor&rsquo;s Desk episode, Dr Justin and Kylie Coulson unpack the latest research on "technoference" and what happens to our children when our eyes are glued to our devices. The results may just change the way you use your phone&mdash;especially around your kids.
KEY POINTS:
<ul>
<li aria-level="1">Study Summary: Japanese research of ~4,000 mother-child pairs found that more than one hour of screen use by mums in front of their children correlates with lower language and social development.</li>
<li aria-level="1">Two Hours or More: Greater than two hours was associated with lower global development outcomes.</li>
<li aria-level="1">Technoference: The distraction of devices interrupts &ldquo;serve and return&rdquo; interactions&mdash;vital for healthy child development.</li>
<li aria-level="1">Modelling Matters: Kids mimic their parents&mdash;mums who use screens more are more likely to have kids who use them too.</li>
<li aria-level="1">TV vs. Devices: Passive screen time (TV) is less harmful than interactive, overstimulating device use&mdash;but still not ideal.</li>
<li aria-level="1">Screen Time &ne; Quality Learning: Despite nostalgic memories of &ldquo;learning&rdquo; from Sesame Street, research shows TV is a poor teacher compared to real-world engagement.</li>
</ul>
QUOTE OF THE EPISODE:
"Screens are a hollow imitation of real life... real development happens in person-to-person, face-to-face interactions."
RESOURCES:
<ul>
<li aria-level="1">The study published in Nature Scientific Reports (March 2025)</li>
<li aria-level="1"><a href="https://happyfamilies.com.au/articles/unplugging-parenthood">Unplugged Parenthood: Reducing Screen Time to Strengthen Family Connections</a> [Article]</li>
<li aria-level="1">Happy Families website: <a href="https://happyfamilies.com.au">happyfamilies.com.au</a></li>
</ul>
ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS:
<ol>
<li aria-level="1">Be Present: Put down your phone when you're with your child&mdash;especially in those early years.</li>
<li aria-level="1">Set Boundaries: Limit both your own and your child&rsquo;s screen time with simple routines (e.g., no phones at the table or during playtime).</li>
<li aria-level="1">Model Mindful Use: Show kids what healthy tech habits look like&mdash;because they&rsquo;re watching.</li>
<li aria-level="1">Prioritise Engagement: Make time for face-to-face chats, shared play, and reading together&mdash;real-life interactions build real brains.</li>
<li aria-level="1">Use Screens Intentionally: If you need a break, opt for TV over devices, and choose age-appropriate, narrative-driven content.</li>
</ol>

Mum’s Screen Time: What It’s Really Doing to Your Child’s Development

https://api.omny.fm/orgs/fa326977-3de5-4283-9b8b-af3500c58607/clips/a95a8bcb-85a4-490a-a9f0-b3b300ad7f20/transcript

#1226 - Forcing Kids To Apologise (R)

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