We talk to the legend Brian Holtzman via Zoom from Austin, Texas.

We talk to the legend Brian Holtzman via Zoom from Austin, Texas.

Welcome to Slop Quest! A show so ridiculous it'll feel like your brain got kicked in the nutz. Hosted by Ryan O'Neill and Andrew DeWitt.

Welcome to Slop Quest! A show so ridiculous it'll feel like your brain got kicked in the nutz. Hosted by Ryan O'Neill and Andrew DeWitt.

Slop Quest

Welcome to Beach Cops! A show so ridiculous it'll feel like your brain got kicked in the nutz.

Welcome to Beach Cops! A show so ridiculous it'll feel like your brain got kicked in the nutz.

Beach Cops

Holtzman Bonus Ep (ZOOM AUDIO)

Full episodes and much more available on Patreon.com/slopquest

Andy has a dream that Ryan got his wife to marry him by taking D pics at the Grand Canyon. Ryan laments the loss of school busses while Andy has a rough morning taking his kid to school. Andy gets hit with a broom by his bus driver and learns an important life lesson. Ryan gets creeped out by his gym teacher and the boys talk about how insane middle school architecture is. Andy gets nervous about doodie stains so he uses a measuring cup in the bath. Ryan fantasizes about Andy’s parents killing him. Andy reveals a secret journal tracking certain changes and Ryan loses it. Andy is going to a puppet birthday party and Ryan is livid. Ryan wants to create a personification of Andy’s brain to watch what it would do. The boys talk about celebrities slumming it with gambling ads. Andy and Ryan do impressions of Morgan Freeman doing ads for ridiculous bullshit. The boys talk about how great they feel eating garbage. Ryan comes up with an idea for bj monkey meat that Andy does not approve. Ryan and Andy then discuss the Crusades with excellent historical detail.

Full episodes and much more available on Patreon.com/slopquest
Andy has a dream that Ryan got his wife to marry him by taking D pics at the Grand Canyon. Ryan laments the loss of school busses while Andy has a rough morning taking his kid to school. Andy gets hit with a broom by his bus driver and learns an important life lesson. Ryan gets creeped out by his gym teacher and the boys talk about how insane middle school architecture is. Andy gets nervous about doodie stains so he uses a measuring cup in the bath. Ryan fantasizes about Andy&rsquo;s parents killing him. Andy reveals a secret journal tracking certain changes and Ryan loses it. Andy is going to a puppet birthday party and Ryan is livid. Ryan wants to create a personification of Andy&rsquo;s brain to watch what it would do. The boys talk about celebrities slumming it with gambling ads. Andy and Ryan do impressions of Morgan Freeman doing ads for ridiculous bullshit. The boys talk about how great they feel eating garbage. Ryan comes up with an idea for bj monkey meat that Andy does not approve. Ryan and Andy then discuss the Crusades with excellent historical detail.

Slop Quest 150 Grand Canyon 

Full episodes and much more available on Patreon.com/slopquest

Ryan gets accosted by a lady hell bent on celebrity love. Then they rip on dues and ladies publicly hitting on people in replies on social media and the total lack of personal accountability by insane people. Andy and Ryan talk about how to build an egalitarian society where everyone’s a social loser. Their solution: tall muscular ladies who intimidate female stalkers and more roasting of reply guys. A lady tries to pay Andy for art in used panties but Andy likes being able to pay rent. Then they come up with a business idea for detectives who solve alcohol deaths. Then they talk about how bad Ryan would be as a police negotiator. The boys then talk about how bad of deal statistically reincarnation is. Andy plugs Gnostic Christianity to a surprisingly receptive Ryan. Andy introduces Ryan to a 90’s preacher who thinks Pokémon is satanic.  Then the boys rip on religious math nonsense. A schizophrenic guy gives Ryan a dire warning while he’s hiking.  Then they come up with grocery store dildo pranks. Ryan calls Bang Bus the “Blair Witch Project” of porn. Andy drinks magnesium before bed and it gives him crazy dreams then feels betrayed by Ryan who initially recommended it to him and is now gaslighting him. The. Andy has a harrowing experience on the Facebook Buy Nothing group and it’s so humiliating Ryan can hardly listen to it.

Full episodes and much more available on Patreon.com/slopquest
Ryan gets accosted by a lady hell bent on celebrity love. Then they rip on dues and ladies publicly hitting on people in replies on social media and the total lack of personal accountability by insane people. Andy and Ryan talk about how to build an egalitarian society where everyone&rsquo;s a social loser. Their solution: tall muscular ladies who intimidate female stalkers and more roasting of reply guys. A lady tries to pay Andy for art in used panties but Andy likes being able to pay rent. Then they come up with a business idea for detectives who solve alcohol deaths. Then they talk about how bad Ryan would be as a police negotiator. The boys then talk about how bad of deal statistically reincarnation is. Andy plugs Gnostic Christianity to a surprisingly receptive Ryan. Andy introduces Ryan to a 90&rsquo;s preacher who thinks Pok&eacute;mon is satanic.&nbsp; Then the boys rip on religious math nonsense. A schizophrenic guy gives Ryan a dire warning while he&rsquo;s hiking.&nbsp; Then they come up with grocery store dildo pranks. Ryan calls Bang Bus the &ldquo;Blair Witch Project&rdquo; of porn. Andy drinks magnesium before bed and it gives him crazy dreams then feels betrayed by Ryan who initially recommended it to him and is now gaslighting him. The. Andy has a harrowing experience on the Facebook Buy Nothing group and it&rsquo;s so humiliating Ryan can hardly listen to it.

Slop quest 149 Low Level Crazies

 

Full episodes and much more available on Patreon.com/slopquest

Andy starts eating eggs when he runs out of tofu and quickly realizes his stomach can no longer process it. Ryan muses on pumping meat sauce down his bathroom sink and wiping with aluminum foil. Andy figures out why tits are growing out of his ass then has a meltdown trying to paint titties on a pin up statuette. Ryan figures out a business idea for being a tit doctor that only works on strippers. The boys talk about the legal loopholes for bottom nudity in states that make it illegal. The boys then come up with an idea for “educational strip clubs” where you have to stay in the club until you answer anatomy questions. Andy recommends that Ryan respond to messages from his ex for the lols. Then they talk about the cyclical nature of idiotic relationships. Andy has a revelation about his relationship and Ryan forgets that he kissed Andy’s belly. Andy pitches a podcast where he does bits with his wife while they fuck and Ryan is behind a screen also doing bits. They talk about the robot lady who shocks Trump while he’s sleeping during a press conference. Ryan worries that using Chinese stars to defend his apartment. There’s some human hunting talk and wasting helicopter fuel watching ladies sunbathe naked on Los Angeles roofs. Then they fantasize about Andy being a race car driver who eats chicken wings and shits through a hole in the car floor during races.

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Full episodes and much more available on Patreon.com/slopquest
Andy starts eating eggs when he runs out of tofu and quickly realizes his stomach can no longer process it. Ryan muses on pumping meat sauce down his bathroom sink and wiping with aluminum foil. Andy figures out why tits are growing out of his ass then has a meltdown trying to paint titties on a pin up statuette. Ryan figures out a business idea for being a tit doctor that only works on strippers. The boys talk about the legal loopholes for bottom nudity in states that make it illegal. The boys then come up with an idea for &ldquo;educational strip clubs&rdquo; where you have to stay in the club until you answer anatomy questions. Andy recommends that Ryan respond to messages from his ex for the lols. Then they talk about the cyclical nature of idiotic relationships. Andy has a revelation about his relationship and Ryan forgets that he kissed Andy&rsquo;s belly. Andy pitches a podcast where he does bits with his wife while they fuck and Ryan is behind a screen also doing bits. They talk about the robot lady who shocks Trump while he&rsquo;s sleeping during a press conference. Ryan worries that using Chinese stars to defend his apartment. There&rsquo;s some human hunting talk and wasting helicopter fuel watching ladies sunbathe naked on Los Angeles roofs. Then they fantasize about Andy being a race car driver who eats chicken wings and shits through a hole in the car floor during races.

Holtzman Bonus Ep (ZOOM AUDIO)

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