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On this episode of Beach Cops, Ryan reveals that his goofy wife won’t stop doing prairie dog noises, and it’s driving him insane. There‘s some kidney selling talk, and then Andy reveals an industry secret that a big time producer and friend of Ari Shaffir‘s is very concerned about Ari's out of control hemorrhoids. Andy pleads for more writing assignments, and they roast the Penn State dog professor (he's a man, not a dog...just listen to eliminate any confusion).

Helix is offering 20% off all mattress orders AND two free pillows for our listeners! Go to HelixSleep.com/BEACHCOPS. This is their best offer yet, and it won't last long! With Helix, better sleep starts now.
To listen to this full episode and get other bonus content, go to our PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/beachcops
On this episode of Beach Cops, Ryan reveals that his goofy wife won’t stop doing prairie dog noises, and it’s driving him insane. There‘s some kidney selling talk, and then Andy reveals an industry secret that a big time producer and friend of Ari Shaffir‘s is very concerned about Ari's out of control hemorrhoids. Andy pleads for more writing assignments, and they roast the Penn State dog professor (he's a man, not a dog...just listen to eliminate any confusion).

Welcome to Slop Quest! A show so ridiculous it'll feel like your brain got kicked in the nutz. Hosted by Ryan O'Neill and Andrew DeWitt.

Welcome to Slop Quest! A show so ridiculous it'll feel like your brain got kicked in the nutz. Hosted by Ryan O'Neill and Andrew DeWitt.

Slop Quest

Welcome to Beach Cops! A show so ridiculous it'll feel like your brain got kicked in the nutz.

Welcome to Beach Cops! A show so ridiculous it'll feel like your brain got kicked in the nutz.

Beach Cops

Beach Cops Episode 202: Prairie Dog Noises

Full episodes and much more available on Patreon.com/slopquest

Andy and Ryan panic as the stream gets choppy then Andy gets a weird HR style email from some corporate dinguses. Ryan thinks there should be upper limit age restrictions to prevent old people losing their marbles. The boys talk about missionaries and why roasting LDS missionaries might be part of a larger plan. They then talk about church scams and boring services. Then they reminisce about door to door salesmen and losing money to Columbia House. Then Andy’s best friend sneaks a subscription to Playboy in order to get a keychain and gets busted by his parents. Then they talk about getting in massive trouble in school and the hell they put their parents through. Andrew falls down in front of his entire class wasted.  Ryan fantasizes about being a woman and worries about what he said in another person’s podcast.  Andy finds out about a dad’s pipe dream : a terrible Grinch 2 screenplay.  O’Neill’s buddy tries to make “bathtub energy drinks” and a few of them go bad. Then they reminisce about the Jolt Cola days and soda brands testing out products on the student population.  Ryan forces Andy to try Durian Ice cream live on the show and the results are hilarious. Andy and his family try weird Japanese chips and they do a deep dive on strange food flavors.

Full episodes and much more available on Patreon.com/slopquest
Andy and Ryan panic as the stream gets choppy then Andy gets a weird HR style email from some corporate dinguses. Ryan thinks there should be upper limit age restrictions to prevent old people losing their marbles. The boys talk about missionaries and why roasting LDS missionaries might be part of a larger plan. They then talk about church scams and boring services. Then they reminisce about door to door salesmen and losing money to Columbia House. Then Andy&rsquo;s best friend sneaks a subscription to Playboy in order to get a keychain and gets busted by his parents. Then they talk about getting in massive trouble in school and the hell they put their parents through. Andrew falls down in front of his entire class wasted.&nbsp; Ryan fantasizes about being a woman and worries about what he said in another person&rsquo;s podcast.&nbsp; Andy finds out about a dad&rsquo;s pipe dream : a terrible Grinch 2 screenplay.&nbsp; O&rsquo;Neill&rsquo;s buddy tries to make &ldquo;bathtub energy drinks&rdquo; and a few of them go bad. Then they reminisce about the Jolt Cola days and soda brands testing out products on the student population.&nbsp; Ryan forces Andy to try Durian Ice cream live on the show and the results are hilarious. Andy and his family try weird Japanese chips and they do a deep dive on strange food flavors.

Slop Quest 133 Durian Ice Cream 

 Full episodes and much more available on Patreon.com/slopquest

Andy’s going through it but Ryan tries to cheer him up by telling him to start “bone smashing” for better “looks maxing” then out of nowhere Ryan brings up the Cinnamon Challenge which delights Andy because he just found a trap remix of a British man choking on cinnamon. Andy stays at “Hotel Crapula” in Texas and wears the skin off his toes snorkeling. The boys come up with governor water fountains for food and then realize what unmedicated schizophrenic people would do to them. The boys talk about the rising class of homeless millionaires once they figure out how many precious metals are sitting in data centers.  Andy washes his hema gear with vodka and Ryan is convinced he’s just using it as an excuse to drink super cheap vodka. Ryan and Andy find waste management services to be highly suspect. Colorado gets rid of recycling to Ryan’s delight. Then Andy falls asleep listening to the fan reading of “Michael’s By The Sea” and wakes up and immediately writes a new scene for it leading to a potential sequel?

&nbsp;Full episodes and much more available on Patreon.com/slopquest
Andy&rsquo;s going through it but Ryan tries to cheer him up by telling him to start &ldquo;bone smashing&rdquo; for better &ldquo;looks maxing&rdquo; then out of nowhere Ryan brings up the Cinnamon Challenge which delights Andy because he just found a trap remix of a British man choking on cinnamon. Andy stays at &ldquo;Hotel Crapula&rdquo; in Texas and wears the skin off his toes snorkeling. The boys come up with governor water fountains for food and then realize what unmedicated schizophrenic people would do to them. The boys talk about the rising class of homeless millionaires once they figure out how many precious metals are sitting in data centers.&nbsp; Andy washes his hema gear with vodka and Ryan is convinced he&rsquo;s just using it as an excuse to drink super cheap vodka. Ryan and Andy find waste management services to be highly suspect. Colorado gets rid of recycling to Ryan&rsquo;s delight. Then Andy falls asleep listening to the fan reading of &ldquo;Michael&rsquo;s By The Sea&rdquo; and wakes up and immediately writes a new scene for it leading to a potential sequel?

Slop Quest 132 Looks Maxing

Full episodes and much more available on Patreon.com/slopquest

Ryan verbally attacks voter registration workers then Andy gets cornered by hilt Mormons this leads to a “scientific discussion” by Ryan on religious inbreeding. Then Andy’s ex does some gross cousin stuff. Ryan then heavily censors a similar story mid sentence. The boys reminisce about trying to bang while full of thanksgiving dinner. Then Ryan forces Andy to tell him what kind of underwear he wears before telling him about a new robot suit fighting league. Then Andy updates Ryan on Lana Del Ray’s husband and new blue collar life. This delights Ryan to no end. Even more so when he finds out that their marriage infuriated Reddit Users. Ryan tells an inspirational story about a man within arms or legs that will warm your heart. Then the boys talk about 3d printing novelty doodie piles. Ryan shocks Andy with his love of libraries. Andy shares horror stories of library shenanigans.  Then they come up with an insane way to get away with criminal tom foolery. Then Andy finds out the medical reason for his fetishes.

Full episodes and much more available on Patreon.com/slopquest
Ryan verbally attacks voter registration workers then Andy gets cornered by hilt Mormons this leads to a &ldquo;scientific discussion&rdquo; by Ryan on religious inbreeding. Then Andy&rsquo;s ex does some gross cousin stuff. Ryan then heavily censors a similar story mid sentence. The boys reminisce about trying to bang while full of thanksgiving dinner. Then Ryan forces Andy to tell him what kind of underwear he wears before telling him about a new robot suit fighting league. Then Andy updates Ryan on Lana Del Ray&rsquo;s husband and new blue collar life. This delights Ryan to no end. Even more so when he finds out that their marriage infuriated Reddit Users. Ryan tells an inspirational story about a man within arms or legs that will warm your heart. Then the boys talk about 3d printing novelty doodie piles. Ryan shocks Andy with his love of libraries. Andy shares horror stories of library shenanigans.&nbsp; Then they come up with an insane way to get away with criminal tom foolery. Then Andy finds out the medical reason for his fetishes.

Beach Cops Episode 202: Prairie Dog Noises

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