What happens when your marriage ends in the exact season your parent needs you most? Katie Noonan knows, and this week, she tells us how you start again in the middle of everything.

Content note: this episode discusses separation and divorce, grief and the death of a parent. Be gentle with yourself while you listen. For support: Relationships Australia 1300 364 277 (relationships.org.au) — counselling and separation support. Family Relationship Advice Line 1800 050 321. Griefline 1300 845 745 (griefline.org.au). Lifeline 13 11 14, 24/7.

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SEND US YOUR QUESTION: hello@clubsandwich.community

In this episode:
The Conversation: Five-time ARIA Award winner Katie Noonan joins Sarah Macdonald for divorce in the sandwich years – learning her 26-year marriage was over from a lawyer's letter, seven months after losing her beloved dad; her 81-year-old mum, his full-time carer for 14 years, asking "who am I now?"; two suddenly single women caring for each other; the coven of girlfriends holding her up; getting sober; and turning all of it into her new album, Alone But All One.
This Week's Hack: Build your coven before you need it. Katie actively organises hers – ten women, monthly ladies dinners, book club, the cheap local cinema. Don't wait for community to find you in a crisis. Put the recurring date in the diary now.
Send this to: anyone navigating a separation while caring for ageing parents, or the friend quietly holding it all together.
A moment that stays: "I used to be one of four on a Medicare card, now I've got a solo Medicare card, and they ask me, 'Who's your next of kin?' And I'm like, 'Oh, I don't really have one anymore.'"

Meet the regular Clubbers:
Melissa Reader — CEO of Vera and expert on Australia's ageing crisis.
Jo Lamble — Clinical psychologist specialising in guilt and family dynamics.
Dr Ginni Mansberg — GP and women's health advocate.
Dr Stephanie Ward — Geriatrician helping you understand the ageing brain.
Kerry Milligan — Gogglebox star bringing humour and honesty.

About Katie Noonan: Five-time ARIA award-winning singer, songwriter and producer — the voice of george and Elixir, with 30 studio albums across 30 years. Her new album Alone But All One is out now, written in the wake of her father's death and the end of her 26-year marriage, and featuring her first songwriting collaboration with Trent Dalton. Tour dates at katienoonan.com.au.

Music from Katie Noonan's album Alone But All One appears in this episode, with her kind permission.

Put The Kettle On — Vera's free conversation guide: the five questions worth asking your ageing mum or dad, at putthekettleon.com.au

This episode was supported by Australian Unity, home health and care services — australianunity.com.au/clubsandwich. With thanks to NSW Trustee and Guardian — search NSW Trustee and Guardian, or call 1300 10 20 30.

Vera is your candid companion as you care for an ageing parent. Have a look at https://vera.guide.

Credits:
Sarah Macdonald – Host + Executive Producer
Melissa Reader – Commissioning Editor, Executive Producer + Clubber
Justin McArthur – Executive Producer + Editor, for P. Zinner Podcasts (https://pzinner.com.au)
Thanks and kudos to Sean Wayland for our theme music Club Sandwich — hear more at https://seanwayland.com