Bare still on that summer break. We're just in the pool man, like, weren't even working. Dude, we're successful. Bright, Yeah, dude, you got to go on vacation, which is successful. You've got to stop it. Uh, this is an amazing episode Working on dating in l A with Justin Sylvester. This was like that, this fucking guy is just so great at iconic everything he does, and we could have talked. This was our longest episode, I think because we could have talked to him for a day. Every time. Every time I'm with Justin, I'm like, I want to talk to you all day long. You're the best and the funniest. And yeah, his story is wild. How we got to work Yeah, this was great. I never got to hang out with him like this where I'm like, Yo, what's your whole story? So you're about to hear something iconic and inspiring to hear. Just get ready to laugh, laugh a lot. We love you, Justin all enjoy the episode, guys it I'm working on it, working on working on friends and family. Welcome to another episode of working on it. We've got a fantastic guest that we've been trying to have them for a while because our r BFF, and I think my mom's our mom's favorite human. Oh she's gonna adopt be. She's literally go I almost got that change table out there and let her do it. Yeah almost. I was like, you know what, you look like you he's the greatest mom, the greatest mom. Let me get one of these diaper changes real quick. By the way, just so you know you've had how many Grammy nominations? Um too, When you walk into a Grammy double Grammy nominated artist's house and she is changing a diaper, it just hits different, you know what I mean? Like it just and then Riley like flipped on me. It was like I was like, come on, justin Justice Silbaston's here tonight. Where we go? There we go. He's waiting for it. You just never believe it, Like you know, Mariah Carey changing a typer. So I always thought like you had like secret people like hiding in the wings doing the dirty ship. People are like impressed you never had a night nurse. Isn't that I supposed to have a night learn any of that? Just because I simply don't know where to find one in COVID. I was like, I don't want anybody in my house right now. But after a year fifteen months old, we finally just got a nanny who I'm so excited. Well, it's weird. You know, most people that have two toilets next to each other automatically have night nurse. Yeah, it just comes with a home, you know what I mean, comes to the toilet and I have never you know, I Kathy Hilton is one of my favorite people ever, next to her sister Cale richards Um. And I remember one of the first times ever went to Cathy's house. It was like, you know, she and uncle Rick live in this huge mansion in bel Air, and it's weird because you never see people working in the house. But if you put like let's say, I put this can down and I turned to say hi to someone. When you turn back, it's just like a coaster right there, the glass of ice, like and there's just people in the walls, and you're like, what the hell is going on? Are you talking about Paris's mom to my parents' mom. Wow, I did go to that house. I know exactly what you're talking about. With the black and white checker floors. Yes, it's just a five start and there was like there was hosting. They were hosting an event there, so there were people working there. But oh my god, but you were just there like on a Tuesday. What was just popping into the sad Cathy. But have you been like you have to go there? You have to maneuver your way in Around Christmas time, I'd be Megan's dream. Actually it's like it turns into a gingerbread house. There's like a blue and white room with a blue and white tree, and then there's like a red tree, and then there's another tree on the staircase, and it's just like it's the wildest thing you've ever been. I'm not even like that into Christmas. Just got me hyped, like I I really yet the step Farland's Christmas Party all the time? That one? Have you done that one? No? But I heard it's a legendary if you love Christmas. It's like it's like you're watching a movie, but you're inside You're in the movie. Yeah, that is crazy. You know. It's so interesting that I wonder what his childhood was like, because you must have had a good Christmas. You must have had a great Christmas, because I have my mom got like was like done with Santa Claus. Once I became like ten, we fell on hard times and then like it was like, you know what I'm buying you some boxers like that Christmas present or like an art set or something you need. So I find myself not indulging that much at Christmas. I don't get a Christmas tree, I don't get to read what I know. But then I go to people's homes like Kyle's house, it's like Christmas han Kwanza, like she's like hardcore for all three, Kathy Hilton, same thing set, McFarland, like, I bet you they had such griswald family Christmas I had. We had a good Christmas. We were blessed. But my dad like decorated every year. He loves Christmas, loves Santa. He made it up. He's a little Santa to keep the fake in Santa alive forever. But was he one of those dudes who, like I remember my friend's dad used to do the same thing, and if you had one comment about the lights, you were done. Like if you were like, oh, herb, I think he missed that, and he'd be like what, like you know, it was like a thing. His was so good. He never Yeah, there was never like who the pulp? My mom? Mom? Oh my god? That literally my mom would be like, hi, you're have a baby. You're not pushing right, you know, Like my mom's like my stepmom is the same thing. Yeah, suck out, get out of here right now. She's like, you're not dying right. I'm like, I'm sorry, I can't read. She's like a man. That's I love and respect your mom. I love that, but let me actually this because your firsthand and yes, this is your sister, but you can tell the truth. We're in like a circle of trust. When your sister became a parent, was she more like your dad or like your mom? And what were the most surprising things that you thought she would never do as a parent that she does? Now? Did you like plan these questions? I saw her kind of immediately go into Kelly Trainer mode of yeah, just um, not quite a helicopter, but it just like into super mom form, Like it's she splipped from kind of this child that I always knew meganaz into like I'm an adult taking care of a time. Like she comes home and round and she just passes him off, and I'm like, hold funk, this this kid is so delicate, like busy. She's like, he's fine, Yeah, you're good. Hold him. I'm like, oh, you're a mom now. Yeah, I have seen like my when Lisa started having babies, my auntie. You see a switch. Yeah, there's a switch. But when she argues with Darryl, she goes, GT. My dad, you have the best of both worlds. Yes, I am the mix. Yeah. You know what's so funny. One of the first times I've ever met you, the first thing I clocked because you meet these people who are in very high stress scenarios. Like one of the first times I interviewed you, you were doing the four. They were like trailers next to one another, and if you went into one trailer, it was like people were running in and out, people were getting people scared. It was chaotic times I've ever done. I walked into your trailer and it was like someone went into a Functui garden, like it was calm. You were singing, talking to your hand makeup person like calm, and I was like, Wow, this is really calm. And then I saw your mother in the corner and I was like, she's the most calming force ever. So I guess she sets She's like the opposite of any mamager or like stage mom. You know what I mean. She's not like, sit up, talk to this person, go to the like. She's very chill and like what can I get to honey, and like feeding me blueberries and it's just like mom first, yeah, now you see my mom. On the other hand, if I went home and I told my mom I was having a problem, I was just scared that she was going to turn up on someone really Like my mom was like, let's get our hands dirty, let's figure this out. Then we're going to figure this out. So a lot of times I would self suthe I was a very My mom was a very like would let us self soothe, would let us solve the problem before we had to get to her with it, And it was It was an interesting way to grow up. But I find myself as an adult. My friends are always like, oh, you didn't complain during COVID. I was like, yeah, I've been kind of on lockdown for the last twenty two years in my life. You know. It was what I do I self suit wo like that, justin what'd you working on in life besides myself and trying to get someone to marry me that. Yeah, Um, I'm working on I do this weekly thing with the Today's Show, Scoop the school. I love how you said, Scoop, Scoop Scoop. I'm trying to get that trademarked and done. Um. And it's really fun. It's on the Holda in Jenna show. We do it on Mondays or Wednesdays. It just depends on what's going on that week. And it's been such a fun experience and it's crazy. Now they're letting me, which I don't know how. I have talked Today's Show people into letting me close the Today Show because I definitely am not qualified. I think you're absolutely qualified. You're You're a delight. I can survive, then you can do it like your energy is contagious. Like really, they threw me in there without just because I loved everyone at the Today's Show, like literally everyone behind the scenes too. They are my people. I love them. I love Holda. They threw me in and I was like, hold to what were doing? She was like, we're on in three to dude. I was throwing behind the scenes. I'm like, how the funk is she sitting there? Read it? Read it Today we'll have like they throw you in, they throw you in. But the craziest part about them throwing you in is normally like on a show, like if you come to my show, it's like, all right, I'm gonna guide you in and like just follow me. It'll be fine. You go on hold to show and she's like you, you have an hour to shine, drum solo, go for it. You're like, wait, hold on, wait, hold on. Like they're so giving, like they want you to have a moment, they want you to take it. And it's normally you're going to show and you're like, you know, you're the guy who likes the fluff. Are you watching Winning Time on Showtime? No? I just know you have to watch up is this? It's about the It's about Magic Johnson's era of the Lakers, Winning Time. I thought you said wedding time for something. Winning Time, Yes, phenomenal show. I love it. So when he comes in and the guy he's going to be an announcer, dream Body's going to be the announcer, and he's like, when you see this, shut up yeah, And normally they will give him like two words and then he'll be like shut up with hold are they're like, hey, hands over, just go right ahead, do your thing. We're following, and you need to like not only know how to read, which is tough for me, but opinions on immediately what you just said. And I didn't, like you don't read before, but they just go like, Megan, you know how like on the prompter, and then they're like Megan, I'm like um today, and then I'm last time I did it, there was like a bunch of these beautiful ladies in wedding dresses and the designer's name was on the prompter, had no idea how to say it, washed it and I was like huh. And she's sitting next to me, had no idea and she was like, oh, it's actually this and I was like, thank you, and now I'm going to wear you to say so sorry TV Live TV. Meanwhile, you're doing all of this and trying to compose yourself because you're sitting next to go to as I call it, next to go to copy, or you're sitting next to Jenna Bush, who is an American I like, she's in American history. She's American history. So you're trying to compose yourself. Reader prompt to keep your smile together. Don't look like you're flushed. Like it's like it's like with us, I feel like when we get flush, they're nervous, blood immediately to the face and we're just like bright. But you know what saves us, that's the Gary Trainer and us that's our father. Because my dad can like how you doing light up and like take over a room and survive in any situation like that. That's like showmanship. Yeah, and that's literally what we got that from him because he literally did the Nantucket TV Nantucket that was the same, and he would get people to call in and bid on the items, donate TV gass up random products like you see on Like so I just like go full g T and I pretend to have margins. Mine is from having to tap dance and I get my ass whipped when I was younger because no one wants to beat up the funny person, you know what I mean. So it's like the same. Yeah, it's like get the gay guy and I'm like, hey, like look over here, looks over here, a second, run over here. That's like where I know it's crazy, but that's where it comes from. Like you try being black and gay in South Luisia sounds impossible. Everything possible. It was like sixteen years of living in lost, Like imagine sixteen seasons of like um what says Joe Rogan year factor where it was wild. So for you guys who don't know out there, I'm from South Louisiana. I grew up in a tiny town called Browbridge, Louisiana, and I went back there literally last year. And there's still a train track that divides the white side from the black side. And that's how we grew up. There was like a white school and there's a black school, and they converge at high school. And it was and still is pretty like it's just evident how much governments are kind of set up to like set black people up for failure. It was just all the housing projects. I still like that all the housing projects are on one side. And it's just crazy because it's a railroad track. And when I was growing up, I ended up going to Catholic school, like in twenty five minutes away when I was in seventh grade, and my friend's parents used to drop me off right before the railroad track because they didn't want to turn into the neighborhood because there was this fear that was built up about the wrong side of the tracks. Um so it was like it's wild thing. It was like really crazy. I need to write a movie about it. And and the kids were self governing like back then, like nobody was gonna come and kidnapped me, like you gotta return me in twenty four hours and then like here taken back and hear some cash, sorry for taking in. So we just like the only rules that we had growing up was you can't be in the house all day. You had to go outside and play. Meanwhile, was a hundred and ten degrees on how to tell, and you had to be home before the street lights came on. So the minute the street lights to do this thing where it's like before they turn on and when you heard it, you had to get on your bike and chase the street lights home and they would come on one at a time. It was like a rolling thing. This is the opening scene. Oh no, And if your mother heard those street lights buzzing and she went on her like she went on the porch to make sure you were coming. If you didn't make it home before that one street light came on, you were fucked fu. You were screwed. It was the wildest experience. But you know, it's when you when you're that self governing, it just is like it's wild, it really is. It was crazy. And then at what age were you like, I like dudes? Oh, I knew immediately. I knew at five. I knew in kindergarten that I like dudes. And the funny part about it is and a lot of people ask me this question about transgender, like did I know? I was like, I knew I was different. I didn't know what the words were until I saw um a TV show. I saw a TV show on Lifetime and it was like the Matthew Shepherd's story, and I knew what gay meant at that point. I knew what I knew that you could be gay and be a teenager at that point. Now, Matthew Shepherd's story ended very terribly. It ended horribly, but it kind of gave me a little bit of faith because his parents never stopped fighting for him or for his legacy, and they wanted hate crimes. It was like one of the first major hate crimes in the US, and it was the first time like parents actually fought for it. And I always said, if I ever have a child, his middle name is going to be Shepherd, like, no matter what it is. Because that story, to me sat with me so hard, and it just it really made me want to get out there. Honestly, I was scared the same thing was gonna happen to me. What ays did you get out of there? Oh? I I kind of started. It was like a slow transition. Like I had a job when I was fourteen years old, and it was illegal to get a job, but I got a work permit. I got a fake license to get a work permit to say I was fifteen. I got a restaurant job at this place called Tsunami. It was the only sushi restaurant in Louisiana. So imagine this like sick ass restaurant and there's a black dude sling and sushi. Imagine there was like a sling in sushi, Like yeah, in Louisiana. And what I would do is Thursday nights were like the hottest nights. So I would reserve like tables for like my regulars that I knew were coming in on Thursdays, and then I would sell them the tables back. It would take me like a hundred bucks here hundred. So I was making like on a good night, like six hundred dollars a night, Like I was killing it. But I had like a little garage apartment. I got a car when I was seventeen. And it was interesting like through those people, Like meeting those people that I worked with and that I waited on college was like a it was like a rite of passage, like you went to college no matter what. So they were all figuring out where they were going to college. The kids that I grew up with, the only way you could go to college is if you played basketball or football. So the college experience, like my mom was like what are you gonna do whenever you like graduate. I was like, I'm going to go to college and she was like okay. But it wasn't It wasn't like a It wasn't like a thing like it was for you guys where it was like a like it was just known that people were going so growing up around them and being around that energy, it just was like all right, now I need to turn this on. Then I met Alie Landry as I was working on this. You know who Alie Landry is. Ali Landry was Miss Usa. She was married to Mario Lopez. She's an actress. She would come into the restaurant all the time and we had mutual friends. And I worked for a wedding planner on the side, so every other weekend I was doing a wedding and I was lady sitting all the bridal parties. So I would do my my restaurant job on Monday through Friday and then on Saturdays. Oh. I did this from fourteen to twenty two, every other weekend, and I would meet her and she would always be like, you need to come to l A, need to come to l A. And those moments were like planet. Those seeds were planet and my head and I went to visit one time and I was like, holy fuck. I saw two gay men walking too hot. Came in walking down the street on the ants changing and there was a club in l A. This is the craziest story. There's a club in l A called a Do. Back in the day, the Do was like it like if you can get into La Do, It was like the ship. So my friends brought me to LaDue. We were hanging out with like Hilarine Haley Duve at the time, cracking Hillary Alien Aj were cracking too. Remember alien Aj. I met them in Louisiana at the sushi restaurant that I worked at, the Magic It's crazy, It's magical. But they were filming Secretariat in Louisiana and I got to know them because they were coming the restaurant all the time, and we connected and we figured out that we were like a day apart in birthdays. And their mom was just like your mom, just so welcoming and amazing. So when I got to l A, I ended up hitting them up and we went to the do and for some reason, I maybe had one too sparoff ice. I was like eighteen or something, eight or nineteen. I got in a cab, this is before Uber's, and I got in the cabin, I said, take me to where the gay people live. I want to see where the game end go and the cab driver was gonna drop you over. He was like he ended up being gay randomly perfect. So he was like, that was your princess moment. It was like my cherito. It was right. He was like, where are you from. I'm like South Louisiana. He was like like pulled over on the side. He was like, all right, when you buy a drink, don't leave it, don't put it down, and if anybody asked you to do anything, don't take anything. Don't don't take any pills from anyone. And I was like multiple Guardian Angels looking at Guardian Angel multiple like you have no clue. I walked into this place called Cherry Pop and I would never forget this place is called Cherry Pop. Cherry Pop, and the song that was on was um Kelly Rowland made this like crazy, like yeah, I mean you Defender. It was like this crazy thing and there was literally hundreds of game in shirtless and I was like Paradise, I'm moving, moving, I'm moving, And I was at that moment I was like I'm done, Like I cannot live my life in the closet. I cannot keep this secret from people anymore. I can't make other people feel like comfortable with who I am. I'm coming to a place where I feel accepted and loved. And I moved to l A two years later, No brainer, And I feel like you were just made to like just flourish and run this town. Yeah, you think the best possible. I sometimes feel like I've been here for twelve years and I'm not gonna lie to you. When I look back on my life, I was just the luck of the draw that my first job in l A. I did an internship here for a year that I was supposed to be here for six months. I did an internship here from one with Remember when ed Hardy was the ship the cloth clothing right back in the day, Ed Hardy clothing brand was like I mean, it was crazy. Madonna used to call. But Donna used to jump on the phone and called my office to get clothes shipped to her from Christian I was a marketing intern. Then I moved up to like his assistant and stayed there for like eight months and had the best goddamn time. I met Michael Jackson, I met Kanye West and the double before his album hadn't come out. It was crazy, it was wild. I don't know. I don't know. Something happened in my past life yet fucked over in my past. I swear to I think that too. I'm like, yo, I was murdered at a very young age. I was, And I have someone who can help you with that. By the way, I know someone. By the way, you should get her on the shop lives. We're so into it. We're going to have someone alsam, but I think they go only do zoom. And this person, yes, she lives. She lives in Long Beach. Okay, your life have a combo. Her name is Gina Torres. Something happened to where your life is like petrified of death and my life is way too lucky and awesome and glamorous. Isn't you crazy? I'm like, I don't desert. That's what happened to me, right right? Do you ever have dreams about your past life? No? I WI? Do you ever have d do you? What were you? I don't. I don't know. Oh I knew exactly what I was. Sorry, everyone listening. Oh it could have been that could have been. It could have been my whole phone. Yeah, I put my whole phone on top of it. In your past life, you must know. Okay, So what do you say? I'm gonna aggression? Is okay? Regression? What happened? And she before you go, you write down on a sheet of paper what you think you were in your past life, and you seal the paper and you signed the back of the envelope on the crease, so that you know and that she knows that no one opened it but you in as much detail as you want. You can put down one thing, you can put down six things. Just throw out what you think you were in your past life, and you go on this like little weekend John. And it's at this place called Mirror Ball in um in Arizona. And I always thought I ran a brothel. I thought I back in the day, I was a madam because I worked well with women. All my bosses have been women. The two women who own the sushi restaurant are still two of my good friends. My boss that Ed Hardy, was a woman when I got here. My first like other job when I graduated college was with Kyle Richards and I've only worked for women since then. Women. Women cling to me, and I cling to them. I love it. I was raised by a single mother. I have two sisters and two step sisters. Like it just it just that's my life. I feel like I was a sex worker and you were. That's what I'm feeling because I a lot of great experiences with women, a lot of where you know, work with my sister. Women in my life empower me. It might it might be true. Could have I could have been a client, not a client the opposite. It could have been for sure, and I'm super protective by the women and just down I wrote that down. I went through the whole experience and your bolt and at the end I go to you go to a one on one with this passion life aggression is it's like a therapy session. At the end, she was like, I truly think that you were like you care for women. You were either a madam in like old town Texas. And I was like, yeah, you can. I was like, you can stop right there, She goes, why. I was like, I opened my envelope. I was like, here's the receipt. I did your job for you. I was like, tap tap tap on the on the sheet with my nail and she was like, how did you know? I was like, she goes, oh, you're a scorpio. You guys have that thing that you're intuitive. But in your past life, the more lives you live, the more honed and you are to your own ability to like relived your past life and to tap into it. So I was like, that's it. And it was funny because years later I met Gina Torres and she was like, the one thing you want you can't have because you sucked it up in your past life. I was like, yeah, I neglected my husband and children to be with the women and to protect the women, and I just let my own life go by the wayside. She was like, how did you know? I was like, I know, I can see it. I know you will love. I don't know you will You're too lovable, radiating love. I don't know you are love. I don't think it's I don't by the way, I don't think it's in my I'm gonna be an old mom. I thought I was going to be a team mom. Honestly, I thought it was gonna year old mom like, oh mom, he's like a kid, like, what did you do? Mom? Oh my god? Yes, yeah. We spoke to a lady and she didn't she give us some past life information. I've had zero gree you said you had dreams. She's no, no, no no, no, we remember we fucking had a terror reader like go through all of our ship. That was oh, yes, yes, is that her name? Now? She told me that, Okay, but she told me that I was a farmer in South America with a lot of children, and I took care of everybody. And she's like currently, She's like, you you worry about taking care of everyone else, but but yourself. Now, maybe she picked you up, maybe she picked up the wrong She didn't give me my past life. But I don't think that. I don't, I don't, I don't know. I don't know anything about past lives. But maybe in your past life, but maybe you were taking care of everybody, and maybe you were like so focused on X, Y and Z. And in this life, like you get to discover yourself. And that's why he raged so hard and now so much. Well, I had felt what I feel like, I would disregard my own feelings for everyone else's feelings, and now in this past year, unfortunately didn't do it during COVID, but in this past year I have focused on you know, my what what do I want? Saying no more often to like pretty much everything. I'm like, I don't want to do that, and I want to do that for you. I don't want to do that for you. Well, you can say no to this. When you were raging, did you have a span, did you have a good did you ever run multiple lifetime like the rock star that I was? Okay, I am retired. He loved all of our party drink Okay, oh you did because he couldn't. He could do it, and he was great at it. He was never an embarrassment. When I would send him out to like the label parties are the Grammy parties, I'd be like, Ryan will go and represent the trainers and loved him. They were like, where's your brother? And I never had to worry, Look is he gonna throw up everywhere? Is he going to cause a scene? So you never got em. That was like your cousin. I had people come up to me and said, where's my party guy, where's my where's your brother? And I was like, because it's never normally like that. Normally the sister are the brother of somebody and you're like, oh, I just don't know how, I'm sure, and you normally normally you hide your siblings. You're like, no, you didn't meant my brother. I'm like, have him, he's great. And a lot of times I'm just gonna I'm gonna be honest with you, guys. A lot of the times siblings who are famous put up with the lesser famous siblings are that I call them normies, put up with the normies because sometimes the normies are hot wires, and sometimes the normies get mad and they start talking and telling the secrets and spilling the tea. Well, yeah, I've heard some terrible stories of celebrity like siblings also like celebrated twins who pretend that they're them and like get money. I say, she looks like me, and I'd be like, you'll take that job to get that money to the club. By the way, could we do it one day? Could we put the wing in? Then you got to see it. You're saying, like, like put me out there to do like like an event appearance like me not not even that, Like you could if you wanted to pull up to an event and get paid for it or like represent something like you don't have to always sing. I mean maybe, but it'd be funny if it's like Megan training will be there and it's just me, Like they'd feel bad for me. They're like, oh, you lost weight and got tall and you can't walk in hell, okay, you're big you Oh my god. I heard horror stories. I've heard people like selling tickets for Thanksgiving, Like, well, have you read Mariah Carey's book yet? Haven't heard everybody do yourself as a favor And don't even get the book get the audio book. Get the audio book, because Mariah is talking to you, talking to you. Oh that's fire, and she breaks that into song and it's everything and she she relives things and like, so when people talk about their siblings, I'm always like, bitch, you don't have ship on Mariot carry Madonna had has a brother who sued the hell. I mean, look at don't I wake up every day in that like guesthouse situation. I'm like, thank you, Megan, this is great, Like anytime I'm nice and alone and like, you know, we got the dogs, like man that I'm finally being like, these are the good times. I'm fine, Like I funked up with all the other ship. I would just I was constantly drunk, and I feel like I forgot a lot of the good times where I missed or I was too hungover, and I'm like, I'm making this like not as awesome as it could be, Like I'd be hungover filling him like this fucking sucks. But when I go back, I'm like, dude, I was on stage for like a giant show. There's thousands of people, and I was just like I wasn't present. So now I'm finally present and I'm like, oh, this is a much better situation. But you're here for the best days, Like it's not like you missed your nephew walking. Yeah. I looked at Riley. I was like, funk, I can't be a drunk a drunk uncle all the time. Really young. He was still drinking, and he was towards the end, so he was really drinking. And it was tough having conversations with Darryl of like, hey, so when Ryan's drinking, I don't want him to hold Riley. Like it was tough having those Yeah, I would make sure to sit on the couch. I was like, I know you always were safe, but it was I'm not gonna go. I'm not gonna stand up, and like, yeah, how do we ask him to sit down? I'm like, yeah, you just tell me to sit down. I'm afraid of holding him anyways. But do you think if your sister hadn't had the baby and COVID hadn't happened, I would it would have prolonged, it would have gone because it was it was good like traveling, you can kind of disguise it just like out all the time. But COVID happened. I just still drank every day, and it's not because like I have addicted personality, So anything that feels good, I want it, and I want it all the fucking time. So now now I'm quitting zin because I was like, fucking it. I'll I used to like pack lips and Zinn is like the tobacco free version of that, but it's nicotine. And then I started waking up recently in the last couple of weeks being like, I can't start my day without popping one of these in Now it's a problem that now I'm in the process of getting off nicotine and I'm I fun. I'm in shambles. I do not feel I don't feel good at all, and I'm just I'm doing the best I can to be like everything. You guys, you know that. I hope you can see this. Remember that video where Snid O'Connor cries one tier when he said I'm in shambles. There was like one tier that came down, but he's smiling through. It's like, yeah, bulls on a two acre lots everything perspective. I'm like yeah, And also like I got I stopped doing everything else. What is this? You know this is not a big deal, but it's also great. The thing I love about what I'm hearing here and what I'm loving here is that the support first of all, the support next level, but self awareness in a dude, like what I tell you, I'm like, what do I talk? I can to date with dates with men who are like a forty plus man. I don't know why. I think. I'm just I'm gonna call my uncle. I'm into like a key together. Yeah yeah, I like to see you credit report. I want to see where you're going. So it's funny when you sit at these things and like you're having a date in the lack of self awareness from these people, but to hear it in someone as young as you. I understand you're working on it, but you also understand who you are, and like you know that one thing leaves another at least another, and you had to stop it. I profoundly am like, I'm like, oh, yeah, give me somebody. I'm like, damn right, yeah, no, I've never been me and Darry'll say that night ever and I like, isn't Ryan awesome now? Like you were always awesome? But we're like, oh I always knew I was, Like I could be better and I could be happier if there's something I'm missing, there's something right, and I could start to feel going out too. I was like, this is killing my fucking soul. Like my spirit inside was like stop doing this, but it's really hard to just stop. But then the COVID escalated. I guess without that, I don't know what is amazing, but what a tough position to be in. Like your brother is like the closest thing to you, and then your husband's like seemingly like you know, and that the fact that they we all live together. Yeah, Like it's like they would drag me to bed. I would just pass on the couch, like we don't want you to sleep in here, this is our bed, because they would sleep on the couch. They're just like carrying me. I've counted seven couches in here. Like if y'all couldn't find another l safe right for I've been working on working on it. I have the ultimate hack to defeat bloating and to get my digestion back on track, just thrive. Probiotic blow is something every girl struggles with. 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To get fifteen percent off their award winning probiotic, checkout just thrive dot com and use promo code trainer at checkout that's t R A I n O war Just Thrive. I've been working on it. I just like I imagine, like I remember, like you know, just living in a home where like you swept everything everything under the rug. That's how we grew up. And a lot of times, like whenever you're significant other has an issue or their siblings or whatever. You don't talk about it, like that's not the older generations. Why it's like my mom and her siblings and like my grandparents, they don't say anything. And I'm trying to break that and be like, hey, you're making me uncomfortable or like here's how I feel today, like and it's the best thing ever. She would call me out of my ship. I would I stuff everything down and keep it in a deep dark place explode. So now I've to not do that. I'm like, say, the therapy was definitely needed, but it was good that I waited a certain She wanted me to go right away, and I was like, funk off, let me just like trying sober up, just like six months. First episodes of the podcast, you can hear me going, please go to therapy and he's like, fun, you. I will never out because of you. It worked out because Dr Drew was like Dr Drew came on. He was like you Dr Drew the best. He was like, you should wait at least six months your brain could like come back. Yeah fucking yeah, and he said brains heal brains. Yeah, I'm years. But you were you were saying I liked what you were saying, because you did all that, I feel like, well, not all that, but your COVID experience. I feel like you said you were doing self love pandemic. My pandemic was so all my friends were having breakdowns during the pandemic. So like I would get through a breakdown with one friend and then after I was like, oh, now I can break down. It be like another friend was having a breakdown, and then that person that first person would come back for a second round of breakdown. So I felt myself trying to keep it together for my friends. But then Black Lives Matter was happening, so I was trying to keep it together for that. And what I was doing during the day was I would wake up, I would go on a two hour walk, like a power walk, come home, I would have a glass of wine, and I would I didn't smoke cigarettes ever, and then I like found a pack of ca Frieze that I kept in my house for when my friends came over, and that would like smoke a capri in the middle of after Yeah, like a long, skinny one, like the ones that don't count because they're long and skinny and they're lying yes. Then I would go to I would take a nap, wake up, going another two and a half hour walk, listen to an audio book. But if if I was by myself, I would do audiobook, but if not, I would take my friends on walks and that's where we would like hammer everything out. And towards the end of the pandemic, I was like, I'm fine, and my friend was like, you walked for five hours a day. I think that you're trying to work something up, to work out something. And I realized after like figuring it all out, I was by myself in a house, a little tiny track, and my walking was to like not focus on the fact that I was alone. And it was just interesting because like after the pandemic, it was like the first time I was like, I think I'm ready for a relationship because I had spent so much time alone focusing on myself. And I always have these ideas of like, oh, I can't be in a relationship now because my career is not here, or it can't be in a relationship now because I only have one sink. Like I would always come up with a with a dumb excuse, but it's like, sorry, you've been alone for two and a half years, it's time for you to start this engine. And it just really worked me to put myself out there a little bit more once the pandemics. You're afraid of dating, I'm not afraid of dating. I'm afraid of being rejected. I think people reject me by the way I Instagram kind of like fun dating up in the gay world. Why I haven't heard about this? Yeah, I feel like I wanted to tell us but didn't but couldn't tell us. Oh, because, let me put it this way, the Internet, I eat, Instagram and Spirit Goddamn airlines funked up the Internet because now like you would go out and meet people, you know, like back in the day you would go to a bar, you can meet people. And now everyone can date from their phones and you know, you know, there's like apps like Grinder and Scruff that people don't need that interaction anymore. They can talk about it in a hundred characters are less and a few photos and then it's like boom bambang. And back in the day, you know, like your boyfriends or the guys you were dating used to a go like guys from like you know, Facebook that lived in Idaho. Now with d m s and now with jump on a Spirit Airline, you just flying him out, and there's so many guys that are getting flown out. And what happens is you don't date inside your bubble anymore. What you're doing is you're looking for the next best thing, and your bubble is now the Internet. And anybody with the Internet is like I have friends who like flew guys out from like Brazil, and like, once the Brazilians come here, that's it. They're like termites, bitch, they will eat your lot. I know dating in l A is very fucking telling you, but gay dating is even worse because a lot of people also, like, you know, like your girl, you're like, oh my god, I'm going three dates from him before I let him see my nipple, Like you know, that's how dudes fu. Dudes want to like get I also didn't want waste time because even at a young age, I was like, I'm gonna get married and have babies. And so when I was dating, I met Darryl at like twenty two, and I was like, I'm going to hook up with you night one because if this is good, that has to be good too. Yeah, and then I'm not going to waste my time dating you. If that's horrible, for sure, for sure. He was a champion and was like to teach other every day. You're like, come on, come on, come on, come on. It's always a little red heads that surprised surprise. He was like, I'm more surprised than what I've seen. The dating apps affects all people, though, Like I have friends, we go to the we went to the bungalow, you know, pretty women are walking and he's like, dude, I would fucking I would marry her. She's the love of my life. I go go say hi. He's like, oh, I can't start a conversation, and then he's just swiping on hinge. I'm like, you're broken the old way, like through a front you were anytime the people, yes, anytime I meet somebody who And by the way, you're lucky that you met through a friend, because a lot of times friends don't want to hook up. People like really weird expect was it a girlfriend, Yeah, that's weird. Yeah, but she's she's cool. But you're completely right. People don't know how, including myself, they don't know how to initiate a conversation in person. And even if you initiate a conversation in person. That person didn't think you're flirting because they're not used to that. It has now all gone digital. It's weird. It's weird, and I'm avoiding the digital aspect as much as I can. Also, I figure, I mean, I've heard horror stories to my buddy just dealt with a stalker, and I'm like, I can only imagine the craziest that I might get just our other friend. Because this is a whole situation. It takes a lot for me to be like you can see where I live, yeah, because I get never I don't want to with my I have two Cinderellas in my house and I'm like, who have that fucking princess? Like Orever Cinderellas. It's gonna be hard, but they had to be approved by all of us. I have to know how to deal with celebrities and celebrity babies and like don't fucking no posting and like no, like we've had so many people come over and just like film the whole backyard and I get to go to cool experiences, you know, like Little Harry Styles after party, after coaching. I'm like, I don't fucking know. I know one who could, one woman who could, like who could hang, But I don't know a lot, Like it's that's a tough environment to be Like yeah, but you know what, the best thing I always say is throw people in the fire. Like for the longest time, I didn't ever want people to know what I did for a living. Yeah, you have the same boat. I'm the same boat. I never wanted people to know what I did for a living because mostly if you watch look at my Instagram, it's really funny. It's like the funniest sire of me. Like I'm just like ridiculous. It's comedy. Goal, it's comedy. It's like ridiculous. But nobody wants to ever funk the funny guy, you know what I mean? Like, like nobody everything. No, I'm telling you, in the gay world, everybody wants the bug give me a game here, know I'm telling you, Like it's like really weird and like find my off. Like if you look on my Instagram and you see me throw up a thirst trap, it's because I've looked at my Instagram and I have deemed that you gotta be less funny. You have to bet funny, and you gotta. Here's somebody who's like, who are you? And I'm like, oh, hold on, before I give you my Instagram, let me throw up the shirtless hoto. Real QUI throw this archive this because people judge you based on that. Now I feel like that too, with like new music coming out of an album coming out that I'm playing for you right now, and like someone has already mentioned on my team like your Instagram you look like mom, and I'm like, I am a mom, you know, but I'm like fun. I guess I gotta come back to being like pop star, like like I have to like find pictures and post. But that's the same thing for everybody. No, no, you gotta now that. I don't know if y'all know what she looks like right now, but I would be in a photo shoot every week. Yes I did. I gonna tell you I had abs. I was like, no, we need you. Everybody. Isn't true that no one wants to fun the funny guy in the gay community. Peppe is out here. We found working on coming out or something or dating in l A something along those lines. We've covered a lot of topics here. Pepe. I'm sorry I have to call you in I needed to get Mom's going to be so excited. It's funny, Peppe, how old are you? Peppe is the cutest. Okay, first of all, Peppe is cutest. But I was telling them, Peppe, how did you meet your how do you meet your your boyfriend? Um, he's like he teaches at Barry's boot camp and I took his class. Smart you paid twenty five dollars a day. No, no, no, I was just there for the workout. He spotted me in the crowd and found me on Instagram. Found you on Instagram? Found you on Instagram? Uh? In what way? I just feel like Instagram is back in the day when we were when we were like getting our grooves on, we were going out, we were like hanging out at bars, trying to meet guys in the bar, trying to talk, trying to like buy people drinks and out. I feel like Instagram is your dating profile. Wrong, l right, wrong, right, And you try to be a little bit thirstier because you know people are gonna look at your Instagram profile because they look at shirt list men all day. Yes, wrong, alright, it's your resume, it's your LinkedIn, it's your brand, especially for the gays, it's everything, and and guys will judge you solely on your Instagram. Who's liking it? Like how many shirtless photos? When I saw my now boyfriend's Instagram, I was like so relieved that he wasn't one of the like self consumed, like overly thirsty, like that kind of Instagram. So I think I missed the beginning part of this conversation, but I think like it's refreshing sometimes for some people to not see that, to find the diamond in the room Instagram. Yeah, but when you were dating other guys, were you like aware that your Instagram was your dating profile? Yeah, you see, like and I get it, like probably the girls do it too. But we're such in a small bubble where you at the Weiho berries in Venice. You in Venice, Oh you oh your west Side Gay, Oh ship, that's a whole different breathe. They have worked in my favorite, which is the only gay in the class, exactly, it worked in your favor you're the only gay in the class. But you know, west Side Gay is a whole different story. But we're gonna talk about that when you leave. Yeah, but you know, we're in a bubble, like you see the same West Side gays all the time. You guys are all like if someone says, oh I dated this guy that not, You're like, oh, you all need the first name. I can figure out who the guy is, even though l A is so damn big Sam. And it's like followed by your dirty mutual friends, like I gotta go, Like I know, it's so crazy. And another thing that happens in gay dating, which I think is always so interesting, and this has been for years and I've literally follow with my friends over It's like you'll go up to a guy and you'll be like, oh, your friend is like kind of hot, and the first thing out of their friend's mouth is mess And I'm like, no, you can't say that about your friend, Like you can't you can't know. No, I don't care if he has a two hundred credit score, You've ben tell me he's Kevin Hart, Like, dude, see, I think I don't know. We gass each other up. I'll straight wise be like that guy, he's a fucking stellar guy. That's like a straight man thing. Yeah, I don't know. Like gays are a little bit different savages. You don't exist in the gay world, which is you can't avoid it. But it's like this, The truth of it is that like it's the same gender dating the gender, so there's like jealousy mixed into like if you're looking at as well. Let me ask you this because I just got in a fight about this with someone. It's a big debate. Okay, here for it. You and I are friends. We I see a guy, Ryan is at a club and I go on a date with Ryan and I come back to you as my friend, and I'm like, oh, you know, I went on to date with Ryan. Is our third day baby to me? And let's say you made out with Ryan three years ago. Do you tell me that you made out with Ryan three years ago? Or do you yuck my yum? Or do you let me go about my business? This is a perfect question for you, Pepin. I dated a man that he fucking went out with. I dated him. What is your am? I mad? Is that the question? Do you tell me? Do you tell told me? But he took he took his time, He took his time, but you didn't tell her in the moment, Oh my god, I was broken. First of all, hold on, can I get hold? Can we get um? What's his name? Back in here. Dr drewe Dr Drew on the line. Oh man, it's you good, okay, Pep. So you wait, hold on, you dated the guy before, years ago, years ago, Peppe, you knew she dated the guy years ago when we were on the first date and he was like and then they tell him crazy story and then he got me drunk. There's an excuse. There's an excuse. The next thing also, west Side Gate a whole different breathe, bitch, I would have called you on the way home. I would have called you on the way home. That's too good. But yes, yeah, I know, I know, I just I forgot it until you were like, Peppe knows the thing that bitch, I need to see how the picture of this man. Oh, you can give the whole right here. Yeah, give me put the Lincoln. You're gonna put the Lincoln in the bio. So it is a little bit different than the situation you brought up, because like in your situation, you're talking about someone you're actively like you just actively were dating Ryan and I made out with him in the past. Yeah, and I think if we were with friends, I would tell you, like, hey, just just flagging for you that we have connudled in the past is the right, right, It's it's interesting because I go back and you want me to not say anything. Well, sometimes people say it in the tainting way, like oh, you shouldn't be with that person because I made out with him three years ago, and I'm like, you can't. This is a small community, Like I don't want to, like, I don't want to yuck your yum. I also don't want to shoot on your plate, like you go ahead and do your thing, and if it gets more serious, I will come to you and say, by the way, kiss this guy three years ago. I thought I would tell you now because you guys got serious. But yeah, I don't want to, like because I feel like as gay men, sometimes it's like, oh, I have a crush on Darryl and it's like, oh, you know, I hooked up with it. It's kind of like a dog marking at charge like that, yes, and it's like yeah, I'm like, it's there's no more bushes. You've peat on every goddamn bush. Really, I really appreciate that perspective. I would not have fun like that about that in actually, but because I've lived this life for seven years longer than you and I how old were you when you came out? You're eighteen, But I've I had a serious boy friend for five years, was broken up for six months, and then serious poyen again. So you're a quick you're a quick study. Yeah, good for you. So you haven't had the expert You did get to pee on a lot of bushes? Yeah, I didn't see too many bushes. Okay, I don't know. That's six months. You can get allowed months, right, Oh my god, I remember, um, I remember at twenty nine, I found myself like I felt confident at what I look like. I felt like I was like feeling myself. I grew into my ears, I found my haircut, my facial lady was on point. I started working out, and I went to this therapist and she was like, you know what, you need to have a whole year. Yeah, And I was like you know what. I was like, Jan what? Jan? Jan's like a white lady. She's like a like a Jewish white lady who's like super nice. And she's like, you need to have the whole year. You've been scared of everything. Now you need to like just relax and have a whole year. I was like, you know, what Jane, I'm gonna have a motherfucking whole year. He's like, come see me in a month, Come see me in two months, and tell me how it's going. So two months later I go to Jan's I'm like, hey, Jan found a boyfriend. As soon as I initiated my whole year, I started dating this guy from the Gunda Beach and I was like, damn, I was just about to get it cracking. Jan I was like no, no, no, no, no. I actually dated that guy for eight months. Funny story, broke up and then two months later he got married and I found out on Instagram. No you didn't. Yeah, okay the apple I'm picking the bad apples. Yeah, but now I'm good. I'm make the stallion. Yeah, I'm running through like I'm too rad, Like did you ever get your whole summer? I did get my whole summer. I had a really nice whole summer. But I'm a lesbian. I'm like once, I'm like, yeah, I've been called that. Can we look up for like yeah, it can be like if we're gonna hook up, can we just hook up every Thursday? And like so I can keep my numbers down, Like I'm trying to keep my trying to keep my quarterly report. Then I'm trying to keep my quarterly report theme. I think I knew that I was going to be like married with babies at a young age and didn't go to college. So I hold it out at the end of high school beginning of like in a tiny town. I hold it out for three years on a peninsula. Yeah, it wasn't like the awesomest guys, but I did that. So now I'm like, I found the one that I want to do that with forever, you know what. And that's kind of sort of my take on life is that if you know that there's an in date to something, go ahead and enjoy. I didn't enjoy many, but I felt like in my twenties because I was just not confident. I didn't have I can't butt you not confident. It was horrible. It was like so stunning. I'm sure you're a photo of me, my si. If you saw my sister, you would be like like my mom when she was like in her for He's like it just hot. She was like my mom was a brick house. Like my mom had like oh my god. They used to call her big booty Zina damn. Because my mom had the tiniest, tiniest top like flat chested would wear like you know, like when she would dress up like it was always low cut. But then she had because my ass like I had to say, guys, as my mom, you know, I get it from my mama. My sister didn't have a sad day in her life, like, never had a pimple, was like Gucci, even with braizes. She was cute, and my mom would always tell me like, You're gonna grow into what I'm telling you. I was like, you're stunning. Thank you, I'm sweating, you know what. I appreciate that coming from a rock star. See, I feel like, now that has sobered up, I'm looking for, um a woman who was also I've just been through life experiences, not like some ship but like I don't know. I've had conversations with the twenty one year old and I'm like, I can't do this. You know, I'm twenty nine, almost thirty, and I'm like not really hanging in there with this conversation. I'm like five and above. Tag this right here, Tag this moment right here. Because when he's forty and he's bringing home with my father did that. They're over there. My dad was oh period, by the way, though, But your mom, I feel like you were an old soul from jump, like you were twenty going on thirty five, and she was like, I hate these guys my age, and she wanted herself with daddy. But your mom was also born in the seventies, right she was, And he's so for them. Like, I feel like twenty one year old women back in the eighties and nineties and maybe early two thousand's were just built differently. They were like these twenty one year old girls now, I'm take anything really seriously. It's just it's just a whole different Twenty one is a whole different ballgame. At twenty one, I was like filling out. I was moving to Los Angeles in a car, trying to figure out my shirt with a thousand dollars under my mattress in case I had to come home. And how I see twenty one year olds. They're like, I think I'm gonna go to be you again and I'm gonna start a clothing one. I'm like, really, wow, can you do that? Like I tell all my friends and like put your feet on only fans and get that money, like, get money. If he fires me, I'm gonna be charge in a month. I'm gonna sit these Amazon car on there. You know, I want to do chips and nips right, Oh my god. And when I'm gonna explain this and then you're gonna bleep out the title because I want to keep the title. But I'm gonna tell you my concept. I want to do only fans where I invite people, and it's a residency. So like, Ryan, do you have good nipples? I do? Yeah, Okay, So I'm gonna have line calm with that chain and I'm gonna say, okay, every day for a week, you're gonna come and you're gonna eat different things and you're gonna like let it following your nipples. So like people want to see you like eat Dorito's, Like you're gonna and we're gonna we're gonna keep it right here because everybody has a finish and I don't want to show. I don't want to do anything nasty that's gonna come back to haunt me. The worst people can say it was, oh, you were eating dorita a Cheetos and they fell on your nipples. Like no, I'm good. It's not bad. You're not the perpets people watching and subscribing don't come out in pert. No, No, it's the same thing. Yeah, there's zero judgment. There's zero judgment. That's just what they like. That's like a lot of people love would pay a lot of money for feet And I'm like, I like this idea five days a week. You'll I went to college twice. There are people out there. I'm not knocking anyone's hustle. I probe I'm good for you. If you have only fans and you are making that cash and you are doing your thing, Who am I to judge? Okay? Because god know, if I was a girl and I needed to go to Harvard University, I would have been stripping in Boston at like, you know, O'Malley could have been O'Malley Stromp. You know what I mean. People need to do what they need to do. I just am so mad that I took this route and that one, Like what was going on. It's like one of the most impressive hustles I've seen. I've seen some serious money. I mean, now, there is only a small percentage that make like really good money on that platform. I don't know, man, I feel like anyone can make I'm upset, clearly make so much money. Seriously look into it. It depends, but I mean, I guess it. Also, it depends on what you consider big money. Maybe maybe maybe a bunch of a make they're paying rent, many they're paying rent. Save your money. I had a roommate in college who was so I went to college with do you watch your Bachelor Bachelorette? Andy Dorfman lived like four houses down from us. We all went to l s U. And my roommate was a med student and she would go to Las Vegas once a month and she would pay two thousand dollars to the speriment right now, and she would strip for a weekend and she would come home with bags experiment run was like, and she was a baddie. Like if you saw her, you would be like, oh my god, like, oh my God, like you're not. But she would go there, pay the two thousand dollars for the weekend, get her time slots, and come back with a bag of cash and pay her college tuition. And I was like, I'm not. Her mother would die if she heard this podcast and knew what she did. She would she wouldn't hear it. No, she would literally die. Watch Barbera's like Megan Trainer, but judge her. People used to judge her, not me. People used to judge her back then for doing it. But I think now it's a totally different time. I have zero judge me for anything that like. I've also, I'm a big fan. I was a big fan of strip clubs. Now it's a little you know, I'm kind of over it. But there was a moment where I was, you know, a frequent flyer, and I got a lot of stories from girls in there. They would give me their life story. I'm like, fucking good for you. It was a journalistic moment for you. You were going and digging in and having people love to tell me all their ships. Okay, hold on, how much money do you think? Like if we started the United the United Strippers College Fund and you were like the benefactor, how much money have you given to strippers over the last ten years? If you had to take a guest and then please don't give you just give me. Come on, I don't want to know. The real question is how much have I spend on Amazon? Is the real questions. But we're gonna go. We're first, we're gonna go strippers, and then come on, come on room absolutely because you don't know you and give me arranged. Here's my issue. Okay, I get drunk, terrible with money, terrible with money, terrible with money. He's very bad with money. Next, drinks are all on me. I pay for everybody. I pay for everyone else to strippers, I pay for I can't. I can't, I can't, I can't. I can't check the listen we are. The cameras are dying left and right. I still need to play Megan sing. Please. Yes, by the way, your mom is dodging question immediately, okay, before you get up, before you get up, all right, just blink fifty to seventy faking. I'm not blinking. No, no, no, no, nowhere near that, nowhere near that, nowhere near that, nowhere near that. That's my money. Now, you know what how much money a month are you given? Jeff Bass? So you think on average? Um, I don't know how much. Because that's my issue is I go put it in the car. It must be so cheap, it's baby shit, rack it up. But I definitely spent like two grands other day on like a bunch of toys for my kid to climb on. Okay, I might as well have a preschool because bottom of Jungle Gym. I'm my endgame goal when I have like four of my children out is to have my own TV show like Kelly Clarkson, but not saying that much because exhausting, um, and I need a co host. I'm in. By the way, if you want to go down that you can go ahead and do it. We can to you and Justin, we can. We can go ahead and like you can go on Maternate Leaven, hold it down and then you come back and I'll give you some let's do it. I'm in. I had a dream that you played me like Meg Meg the Trainer Stallion kind of music because you had a baby and now you're like, you know what, I'm a woman and it was like all like kind of dirty and raunch and I loved it. Okay, this is going to be opposite quite um this first one, why can you hear me? Okay, take them off? Okay, oh folk, it's playing. Okay, this first one is the first single. It's emotional, feel free to cry, So Justin's just vibe and dude, just one's looking up. He's such a model. I love a smile, pure joy m. First thoughts, thank you for serving me, choir, thank you for serving me. Quirlcome even the first time you heard um remember that song, dude, I'm a little drunken. I need, you know, automatically thought, who am I going to send this to? Like? Who am I? What friend is going through this that I can send it to? Everybody's going through it, And it's almost like it's at one song You're like, I'm gonna hold onto this and tell a friend met it. And then you're like, you need this song. Yeah, like you know what I mean, Like you need this song or like Kelly Clarkson moment, like you just need to write that. Let me go ahead and slide into Yeah. But then on the back in your feature, it's so good. It's so good, you know what I mean? Yeah, he's popping, He's okay. I like this very adult, very adult? Now is this about the man that Peppe also made up with behind your Back? No, it's not. It's a it's about you know, everyone has that one family member that is going through something. It's tough to watch them go through it, and you try everything you can to help it. At some point you're like, I have to step back because yes, it's not good for me. At this point, you know, are you getting ten percent from this song because it's obviously about you? Oh? I would love that. Haven't heard that? Actually I would love ten percent, even five percent. I will say, everyone's gonna say this about Ryan, and like, yes, some parts of it about Ryan, but there's we have a largely family. By the way, do you have a large messy family. There's some mess everyone's got mass everyone has that uncle, everyone has that one and that one. You're like, do we have to invite on trus I'll even take two, that's fair. Do you want to play the other? One can play? Okay, Bob, Okay, Bob, Okay Bob. I can't play as money because it's plenty music. It's fine. I'll tell him what he says. Okay, Justin feels sassy and fierce. Saw this one. He immediately says, okay, Bob, going back to the roots, going back to the roots, go back to the roots. There is duop on this album. Yes, he is knocking on the table. He definitely feels this one a lot. The first album, Megan Trainer first album, Megan Trainer, Big band, give it to me. I see his nipples. Well he's doing that. I forget the title of his company. But he will eventually be eating food. He is shimmying now, rolling around the room. He's loving this song. He really enjoys the song. This will be the second single, so he will not hear this for a couple of funds, maybe more. It's okay, you know, let him wait. Welcome home, Welcome home, Welcome home. That was the best reaction of welcome you know, do let me tell you what I'm happy m h. A lot of times artists put out their first project, and a lot of times it's so them, it's so real, it's so their sound. And then the label wants you to do something different and you feel the pressure because the girls are doing other things, and then you try to conform and then you're like, but I can't find it, I can't for it. And then all of a sudden, this thing happens where you're back where you started and you look around and you have this big sound, full band moment from the get go, and then music kind of went another direction and then you're back home. But you realize you look back, You're like, damn, Lizzle really is doing the big sound too, Like you're jumping like oh that bandwagon is coming back, or like you know, I'm back where I need to be and the sound has caught up Silk Sonic, same thing, Big Sound, Bruno Mars, Big Sound band live interaction. So I'm just so happy that you're back to the writing this album. And one of my co writers, Mozella, she's amazing. She did I came in like a wreck and bow and she said, you know, a's crazy. As I've been taking these sessions and everyone goes, I wanted I want to do that Megan Trainer sound and it was like, excuise me, I have a sound. This is going to be here, Lady Gaga club every single every single first session and it was just then sound We're gonna put all together. But that's that is what happened. That is what happened. And the title blow up on TikTok and I was like, the people have spoken no, not brought it back. And the album is called Leap. Let's put a bow on this episode before Megan just says any more spoilers or anything that has to do the album okay, but you're you're gay cousin over here. Mom, you're adopted me. Just so you know, your gay brother here is going to make you wear whenever you do the ballot on TV, You're gonna wear the bone straight parted down the middle. Extra weave is going to cut the bottom up, but he's gonna shatter it a little bit. And you're gonna wear that white moment that like white cat suit are You're gonna sing it out and good and you're gonna let the fan hit the We've just enough to where like it's like that like Hillary Duff back in the day moment. That's what you're gonna do. Okay, I will right come to fitting. I'm coming. I'm picking out everything it's happening. It's happening with like a little pair of sunglasses on just you can hide your grief, you know. Look, Christina Aguilera moment right here. Okay, I love you. Please do a TV show with me someday. Yeah, where can people find you? Socials and to judge your five years by the way, five years thinking for that video, by the way, I am. They think I'm so cool because I know you. I think I'm like, oh, no no that mad I was like, I love a no no, they love think like it's so cool that I know you. But everybody Daily Pop eleven t Central. You can find me on Instagram at Justin A. Sylvester. It looks like Justina Sylvester. I'll take it to and on TikTok at Justin Sevester TV and on hold it in general Weekly with the school. He about to move to New York lays now I'm trying to today, shall hire him the fresh give me the fresh? D you New York. They need it. They need to wake up to you. You know, I hope call someone. I mean, yeah, they're perfect. Okay, we love you. Thanks for watching listening. Sorry so long, mamma. Working on a Podoles Socials, Maga turners into figured Out Who Gives a Funk? It was a great episode. I've been working on again on it, working on workain on it, and I've been working on workain on it, working not working on trash