Two Cool MomsGotta Piccata!: Episode 98 with Joe Gatto and Steve Byrne
This week on "Two Cool Moms," Joe and Steve serve up a hefty dose of humor alongside some mouthwatering chicken piccata! The real flavor comes in when Steve reveals his newfound passion for making chicken piccata, and Joe his way of getting groceries. Amidst the piccata, they tackle listener questions on topics like plane seat upgrades and laundry mishaps, and even a Drew Barrymore encounter! Tune in for an episode that's gonna have you saying “gotta piccata” at any convenience.
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Hey everybody, thanks watching this week's episode. We want to promote where you can see us.
For tickets, go to Joe gottoofficial dot com to see all my door dates. For Steve's go to punch up dot Live backslash Steve hyphen burn that's beat.
Why r I need? He makes it super easy to find him. And now onto the episode.
Wear a ticket money.
We're rolling.
Now, we're gonna ride our first commercial. We got our first commercial here. We do a sponsor, which is excellent. Do you like comfort? You should wear a vir.
I can't laugh at me.
I'm trying it to, trying to make us money.
That's what reading what.
They were so excited. I've never seen you as excited. Go for it?
Is it too much?
I love it?
Do you like comfort? My head? Do you like comfort?
Of course you dude, I didn't do anything.
Do you like comfort? I'll do it later? No, do it? Do it?
Do it?
Do you like comfort? Of course you do? We all do. That's why Steve and I wear We don't have a commercial, anyone, Are you serious? No, cool moms, I'm Joe Gatto.
We're never making money. I'm Steve Burne and we are here.
With a brand new episode of Two Cool Moms. Thank you, Stevie. You look great, pal. It's a nice comfortable shirt you got me.
Well, here's another time you got me. I wore that's what shirt. I loved it. I ordered it. It was pink, and it comes it's like an off purple, and you go, that's not a good color on you. I go, okay, and then you're like, I'll take it, and I said okay, and then I literally went out. That same day, he went to Todd Snyder down in, uh, you know, here in New York, and I got this new powder baby blue one. I'll wear this today. And look who's wearing my old sweatshirt, my old friend. I didn't even know you're gonna wear that. That's so funny that you were what. I will say this, It does look great on you.
I told you. It definitely looks better on me.
It definitely looks great.
Yeah, yeah, for sure. I'm just saying that the blue looks way better than this ard on you.
But you're that friend. You're that friend that will tell you just a straight shooter.
That's what we do here.
In the deep recesses of my subconscious I'm like I'm not really, this is not the color I wanted, and I don't think it looks good on me, and I never I never thought anything beyond that. And you're the one that will pry it out going, Yeah you don't look good at.
It, pride or just pounded in.
Well, you literally come out and say it. Yeah.
No, I think I think it's important to, you know, let your friends know, because there's nothing worse than that you see yourself in a picture and you're like, that doesn't look good on me, and you're with all your friends in a picture.
You ever had that happened?
Yeah, this podcast when we interviewed Colby, that's the heaviest I've ever been in my life. Really heaviest I've ever been in my life. Wow. And then I saw the one we did the Zoom Pittsburgh, and I was kind of getting together, but it was super early in the morning. I was to the LEUMUSX Fantasy Camp and since the Colby episode, I've lost ten eleven pounds.
Nice.
Yeah, we were calling you Kobe Beef for that one.
How was he? How was the thing?
Why do the Leviu Fantasy camp was an amazing experience?
Is that what you lost all the pounds because you were actually doing well.
I lost all the weight, but then I got regimented with my diet and stopped eating after seven o'clock, which is like, you know, it's a pitfall for any comic on the road, of course.
But I want to take a time out here talking me about this camp thing, because you were exercising and skating a lot, and you were able to do it without dying, which is very impressive.
Without dying. Yes, I did not die, no death.
You went straight from Nashville was a big fat bastard to that and you went right off the States.
They just put you on skating.
I am your friend.
They're like, oh my god, do you remember.
When you do you remember the video game NHL Hockey for for Nintendo when you could build your guy and you can make him bigger. I feel like that's what happened to you at the Limue camp. They're like, make him fatter, he'll be the who checks really well.
Feed him. And then you went there and they'd be, oh, no, let's slim him up, make him a faster stainer. Yeah that's great.
Yeah, it worked out. It was one of those things where you know the fantasy camp is basically Mario Lemieux. You know, I believe this is the greatest hockey player of all time. Stat's say he's second to Gretzky. You know, overcame cancer, et cetera, et cetera, and due to his cancer and him coming out the other end, thank God with it, he created the Maril Lumux Foundation, which raises money for cancer research and they put in wings in children's hospitals to make it make kids stays a little better while they're dealing with cancer. Right, So, over the years I've gotten to know them, I've become immersed in them. We do the comedy Jam every summer in Pittsburgh to raise money for them.
Which is coming. It was just tickets on sale now.
Actually tickets are on sale now and that is the data is July July eighteen eighteenth.
So I'm going to be there, is going to be there.
Q's going to be there, Yes, and then You're going to be there, and then you're gonna You're.
Gonna be there. And then we have some other friends that.
Are Frankie cynics. Yeah, people have done my favorite solo fit uh Lacelarabie a great comic. And then my good friend Brendan Wayne, who plays the Mandalorian, the day to day guy. He's gonna be doing a meet and greet, so if anybody has stuff they want signed or whatever like, he'll be in the lobby taking pictures for for people.
I don't know what I've planned yet for this one, but every year i've I've brought the thunder, so I.
Got you brought figure. I would say more than the thunder, but it's raining men, is how I describe you. You shocked me with an appearance of William Hung last year, which floored me. William Hung said, can you feel love tonight? From Ryan King.
I don't know wan to do this year. I'm gonna figure out.
And you orchestrated the encore. We had this Steelers drum line come out, and you came out to a full on, full gear drum drum gear. Uh Gwen Stefani's banana hallo back girl, that's right with with the drum, which.
Was like and I needed the baton. That was fantastic.
I mean with Walliam Hung, I fell to the ground laughing, and then this one I fell to the ground laughing even harder because you were you are like full on method actor. You commit to the bit and there's.
No necessarily fit me well either for the comedy. But it was great for comedy and also kind off my circulation.
I got lighted.
But it's weird, you said, Bessie loved it for your anniversary.
It was great. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I brought the beat, but we did that. It was a drum so.
Versus so Yes. Tickets on sale now Friday, July teenth, Rivers Casino, or you go to Punch Up Dot Live on my page and it's right there. But Rivers Casino, Pittsburgh. Tickets runs right now.
All proceeds go to charity.
All proceeds go to charity. And it's always sold out. It'll sell it this year again, and it's a it's a great comedy experience. As you've seen the show, I think most people don't know what the comedy Jam is. The comedy Jam is a show where comedians come out, you do fifteen minutes of material, then you sing a song of joyce with a live band. And what did you do the first first year?
I did forget you? I see low Green and you had Yes and.
I had kid Yes like party City right right, I got the big letters F and you, and I brought out the confetti canons and then I hired people to come out and start shooting and throwing confetti all over.
Well.
Then this year when William Hung sang can you fee the Loft and I you.
Had had a party city again, and I made them get blow up animal costumes and it was a giraffe, it was a lying in a zebra, and they were going around and saying yes in character.
Yeah, I mean you you fall on commit. I remember that first year too, when you did see Little Green. You had Jiggy out there dance and you're out there ans and you're singing, You're all in, You're fully committed. The whole audience is crazy. And because you commit so much and you had all these extra activities going on, Sal was after you and he was like, oh no, no, no, no, no no no, And Sal's just gonna sing yeah, which would be normally fine for anybody else.
Right then I think you're.
Saying you want to dance with somebody by Yeah he did, okay, he did great. Yeah, but it's it's a tough fact to follow. And then you're like, I think, what would you last this year.
I'm like, you should put me last, Like how William Hunk coming? You didn't know?
I had no idea, So yeah, so that we should guys come out as if you're in Pittsburgh area, it's fun, or if you want to make a trip out of it, it's a great weekend.
So yeah, we're gonna do it up. And then I did the Fantasy Camp and that's where Lemieux brings all these Hall of famers out, and then you have like me who's doing a stand up show, and then you have all these campers that are there to support the Lemoux Foundation. They pay a pretty penny to be there, but for five days you're you're treated like a professional athlete. You're playing a PPG arena where the Penguins play. You're given your own locker, you have laundry service, you have equipment managers, you have full on trainers. I was doing the cold plunge and hot plunge after games.
The hot plunges like.
A teapot, well, you you made a pop lunch, just not a thing.
A hot plunge is basically a jacuzzi you met.
It's a super hot AaTh I think it's like over it's like a hundred sum and you're sitting there for four minutes. Then you go in the cold plunge for two and you do that back and forth three times.
Oh my god, So I.
Did that and it accelerates your circulation.
There's care of inflammation. Guys, you have inflammation problems, Cold plunge is the way to go.
I've heard are you making this up?
No, I've heard that from people for real, for about cold plunge. Don't do it. I'm very inflamed. I'm Johnny. I'm Johnny Brow. I'm flaming on. That's I'm very inflanting.
I am. There's nothing can help this flame.
You. You hope to be right. You hope to be inflamed every pri parade, right like I, I'm flaming in some capacity.
I burned bright.
Let's just say there's no breaking down this inflammation, no amount of stopping the dis mission.
But we did that, and then because of that, I lost I lost a pretty nice chunk of weight.
I will say, it's fun to be able to see your jaw line, buddy.
Yeah, well this is it's the gizzard, that's.
When it comes out. It's nice. That's because you definitely have. You have a cheekbone, which we normally don't get to see that much. If you look at some of the clips, you get the cheekbone to the jaw line. You have a strong drawl. It's nice.
You should taking.
Apples coming back here you go.
Yeah, it just hides behind some Jersey mics and chicken. And you're a problem on the road. That's the thing.
That's what you're around me anymore. I've noticed. I've noticed you have been on the road me forever.
It's been a minute that people have talked. You surprised me in Vegas?
I did. You don't surprise me anyway, You never surprised me. I have to come to you. I well, oh, that's surprised Vegas fun.
I have to work. You have you you can leisurely just say nah myself like I'm out here working. I'm gonna do this for myself.
I was in Vegas for work and I popped in. But listen you, that was really fun. You wouldn't see me coming in Vegas.
That's right.
You. I'm in the middle of the show.
And J be Chemical Comedy Club where you could sketch Steve Burn twice a year twice a month.
Twice a month. Here's the great thing about Joe though anybody else, they'd sit in the back, they'd wait for a joke to end. They'd be like, well, I'm gonna wait to the punchline. Joe. Literally, you just see him storming up. You got a very distinct walk. Can you just walk right up? Doesn't matter what bit a miliment off, doesn't matter. You just walk right up, grab a microphone, and now you're part of the show and the audience. It's so funny because it takes the audience like maybe five seconds like hold on, wait, who is this? Whoa and then the place goes crazy.
Yeah, it's very fun. It's very fun. I have a good time with the pop and stuff. It's always so great. I actually just got to do Doctor.
Phil Live in Minneapolis with Adam Rant.
Adam is such a great show. If it's in your town, check it out. Yeah, he does such a such a good show. But it was just fun to like because he doesn't announce the guests, so the way you find it out is if you're in the room. Sure in the place a rupted, which is always good. It's nice to feel the love from people. But my fairy thing about that.
I didn't even look. I was watching you. I just like, watch your face realize it's me like, no.
Hold on, are you doing this? It's great because then it's like, you know, you're normally doing a show, which is always fun, but then it's like, oh, now I get to have fun. You know you're there to service the audience. But but let me ask you, when you do your show is obviously they're paying to see you. When you do something like Doctor Phil and you walk out and you hear that reception and you've done it a few other times and some other things you told me about, But what's that like to know that there's like the element of surprise. I love that, and you're still hearing that adoration.
I love that. I do well Adam.
Adam's got some crossover too, because like he was with South for a while. But like when I went and did Matt Rice's show, He's at De Lago up and i'll say New York, and he was like, hey, you should just come out whatever, and I was like, I don't know how big of you know?
So I when I went up.
There and everybody went to that, it's like, oh, that's really like you feel like, you know, people who like comedy know you, not just fans of the insider world. So it's nice to see like outside of your immediate world when you're just in the comedy, you know, shows and scenes, it's a different fun thing.
Even the love I get on different podcasts.
That we go on, you know, on the like I was just ad that's a long ago the Tiger Belly with Bobby Lee, which I had never done, so to sit down with him and then instead read all the comments of being like, oh, you know, I didn't know them this way, you know.
Before like people just get exposure and you read the show and stuff. So it's fun.
I really enjoy this part of this journey for me now because I never had that. It was always self created self I think, you know. We're recording this today on March fourth, and today, twenty five years ago was the first day I ever performed live with the boys. Five years ago March fourth, two thousand, we did a show at the Producers Club, an improv comedy show, the Ten to Loins Present Wow, and it was ours. The name of the first show I forget was Espionage, I think was the name of it. And we did a live show for the first time ever, and it's twenty five years and it's still doing it and it really I reflected today about it, and I was like, this is really cool that this journey is still burning bright for me.
So you remember that date specifically specifically? Yeah, and have you did you do a little text chain this morning?
Like, yeah, guys, MR started it off because somebody stole We lost the tape of it because we recorded all of our shows.
And somebody stole the campaign from the back.
Somebody came up it was a good show and walked down at the same moment we all realized it and it was a fifty person theater and it was both basically mainly friends and family. So sad was like somebody stole a camera and everybody ran out and hit the streets like trying to find it was.
All gone forever.
How was that show?
Oh, it was insanity. It was probably terrible. I don't remember.
It was an improv show, you know, we were doing as a family, But I remember a big last but I think what they were was just I remember enjoying the night very much.
It was unbelievable. Now with the two shows both sold out, fifty people each, Yeah, which is great. Where was it at again, it was at the Producers Club. We always rented.
Yeah, we always rented our own spaces and shows, and I think like a couple of times we ended up.
Like owing twenty bucks.
But those shows we crushed. It was two sold out nights. I think we made one hundred dollars each, which is really cool. And yeah, it was just it just like my whole journey has been starting today twenty five years before.
That's dude, well congratulations, thank you.
And then tonight I get to perform live with you. We're doing our live to cool Wops.
Yeah, we're gonna lose a hundred bucks, but dude, what what an amazing journey. And I think it's like, what do you think about when you go back in time? Because when I recollect, I always think those early years, my first four or five years are so romantic to me, of course, because it's like meeting a girl for the first time, and it's like it's like all the things you want to do, wouldn't it be nice that Brian Wilson, But what was it? What was that journey for you those first few years or like pie in the sky or dreams thoughts.
It was all hobby.
It wasn't really I didn't think I was gonna have a career in comedy at all. Even while we were doing those shows, I was always we did.
It on the weekend, you know.
It was kind of thing, you know, for years, just a side dish.
Yes, that was it, even like almost it was probably a decade almost right nineteen. Well, we started rehearsing in ninety nine and then we didn't get on air till two thousand. We did in two thousand and nine. Was like two thousand nine or basically a decade just for doing anything. But do you remember the date of your first stand up show?
September thirty, nineteen ninety seven. You know I was, I am, yeah, that's fantastic, Yeah, I yeah, because I had a journal that I wrote every show down my first probably like eight years of stand up that and I wrote everything down, and then it got to a point where it was just cataloging the nights and shows because it was like I know what I'm doing now, you know, but it just transcribe and kind of like notate all that stuff. It was. It was pretty wild to go back and look at that if you had to.
Guess how many shows have you done? I thought about how many spots have you done?
I mean, it's.
Gotta be in the hundreds of thousand, your oldest shit.
You got to be because I was doing I was doing seven or eight sets a night. Yeah, on a Monday. Yeah, I mean that that'd be great on a Saturday, but like on a Monday, I was doing that. And my first eight years, i'd say eight to ten years were in New York City. So I mean, you do the math on that, It's like, wow, it's it kind of adds up. And then all the road stuff and three shows a night on Saturdays in Atlanta.
You've got to be over one hundred thousand, Joes, I would.
I would assume it's got to be somewhere in there. And at some point you'd think I'd figure there's goddamn job bellt but yet to yet to.
You know, it's just good about you don't give up, even though you still suck. After one hundred thousand, You're like, I'm going to get this.
You don't give up. That's what I'm saying. That's what people admire about you at home about it all the time. It's like everybody all signs a pointing that he should give up, and he just won't. It's admirable, it's admirable. Kudos.
Well, you know, my wife always says to my son, She's just like, you know, do you want to grow up and be like daddy or do you want to be successful?
Funny?
No, it is a it's a hell of a journey. But I think especially like like for you to see like and and to go back for a second before we get into this, just to give you another compliment, I think, like you think of a show like Portlandia, right, yeah, a very kind of niche, very cult following or you know, Bobo, what was it, mister show? Like all those shows are so revered and so appreciated, right even the rest of development, Like that's a revered show, never had the viewership. That's why he got canceled, right, and then it was a reboot and it just didn't do anything right. And as much as like that hardcore community loves it, it's still kind of like a little niche thing. Whereas Jokers was, that's a show that everybody knows. It's one of the few, and I believe it's the last. It's the last kind of like cultural touchstone that this kind of had in terms of entertainment. And I think the last time I saw the country galvanized around something was like Tiger King, but we were forced to watch it because of COVID, right, But prior to it's like, my kids know the Impractical Jokers, right, and they watch YouTube. They don't watch traditional TV, but they know because the clips come up in the feed and stuff. So I think it really is like I think the Big Bang theories, like the last sitcom that everybody will have remembered. I think Impractical Jokers the last show that even if you never saw an episode, you know exactly who those four people are. But the issue is the great thing is that I think like at least eighty five percent of this country has seen at least one episode of that show. And then you think about the plethora of all those other people. So when you're talking about cross pollinating, you could show up at Kevin Hart show, the place would go crazy. You could show up at Matt Riiche, et cetera, et cetera. You go to Dolly Parton and she'd be like, I'm gonna bring out a friend. Like, the place would go nuts. It's like it's amazing using the the outreach.
The reach is crazy. Yeah, I feel that all the time because you talk about that all the time.
Like when we're on the road, I bring you know, when Mark and I will stop and like we're in between driving between Topeka, Kansas, and we're Omaha, Nebraska and we have to get gas in the middle of nowhere and we just pop in the store and you have the guy behind the kind and be like, hola shy, you know, you know, ever he takes out his flip Camera's like let me take a picture, you know, Like it's unbelievable, Like you have all these things where no matter where people see me driving, I'm like, how do you know? Like it's still not lost on me, Like the reach is crazy, but like people no matter where I go, somebody's gonna be like you you Joe Gator, you know that guy, which is which is so fun.
But I think it's like it was if there was a comparison, right, if I had to think about it, like Jackass, but the difference was like Jackass was pranking everybody else whereas you guys are so communal. I think that's why the hard the relatability of it is like, oh, that's me and my friends, right, yeah, I mean, I'm sure you've dissected the psychology of this thing to the end degree. But I think other than those two, I think that's kind of like those two cultural touchstones in the country. But man, what a what a ride to have been on it. I can't think of anything since that is coming to the ether, can you? I don't know, well not because nobody would know better than you.
Well, I think the the cable network's to the street. The American movement to streamers instantly dissected the audience, right because you either you had netflixure.
You didn't, you have Hulu, you don't, you have whatever?
You know, So if anytory you have Apple Plus or you don't? You know, So people if you're not on basic cable, you know. I mean, the only thing I will I'll honestly say, is like, like there's probably some of those HDTV shows or Real Housewives, you know, but where I think I don't know, the Housewive is still a little bit more sexual, but I think they do have a broad reach.
But that's those kinds of are the ones that are.
But even like the oscars the Oscars was the third ratest lowest Oscars in the history of the Oscars. And again just in terms of like communal entertainment, that one that won, I don't I don't think I've even still the trailer for it, right for Anora, I have no idea what what the movie's about. I don't know what the premise. I haven't heard anything about it, and it won. And the other one we were talking in the Zoe whatever, so I forget how do you say her last name? But yeah, you think about that, like, that's a girl that's in Avengers and and I don't even know her last name. I know it's Zoe. I think she's fantastic, but I don't even know her movie. I have no clue.
Yeah.
I saw Conclave and I walked, I will you watch? I watched Conclave because you know, I'm a I'm a Catholic. Yeah, and I was like, oh, this is Ray Fines is pretty cool. And then it's a it's a do you know what it's about?
No, well, but based on your it's not good.
Well I saw it in Nashville, mind you Okay, And it's a it's about a new pope and it's the process of garnering a new pope, and what you learn at the end of the film, the sixth sent twist, is that the pope is a trans and you're just sitting there like, come on in conclave, in conclave, yeah, Transphope, Transphope, yeah, trans Pope. And now look, I'm in Nashville and I heard a guy go oh, fuck no, and he got up and walked out.
They cry and gained the pope. The pope. Yeah.
And my wife and I really enjoyed the film up until that moment because there was so much suspense and it's just like that's you're just shoehorning that in to make a statement. And again, it's like Christianity, Catholicism, it's always been a punching bag in terms of the entertainment industry. You can make fun of it, you can do it. You you know you you never make fun of Mohammed. You never make fun There's never been a horror film inside a temple. But it's like, for some reason, this is the one sect of religion that can be made fun of over and over and over again. And it's like, look, I wouldn't have minded if it was a great if it was a payoff the path, right, but it just kind of like came out of nowhere, and it's like it's Hollywood. Oh, I get it. You did it because of X Y Z and it backs up your narrative and your mandate and it's gonna win awards, and it was nominated, right, but nobody went and saw it, and the few people that did see it, people like me, were fucking bamboozled. Yeah, and it was like, why I.
Didn't even know that about it?
Well, you should put we gotta put a spoiler layer on here because people don't know about the pope.
I mean, you've gotta let them know they're gonna be ruined. Conclave for tens of people.
Out for a six months. But even have you seen any of the Oscar films? I couldn't even I couldn't even name five.
I saw a real hurt, a real pain. I saw a real pain, which he won.
The award for Oh the Jesse Eisenbergsberg. I thought I like him.
I thought it was well done.
I didn't see that.
Yeah, I saw that one well done and it was good. Yeah.
Yeah, and uh, Kieran Colkan won the award, very well deserved I thought it was fantastic. He's one of my favorite movies back in the day. Speaking of a concluicte secret Live of Altar Boys. Do you know that one see Lives of Altar Boys.
Back in the day. There we go, another Catholic, one of her favorite movies. Well, I've won that. He might have won for that. I don't know. Take a look at that. He might have won. Who he was, He might have been nominated. I think he won for it.
The World, The World, And that's a film so good, that is so good. It was ahead of its time, and it had everything in it that a Hollywood film would want these days. You want diversity, you want uh, somebody that's gay or whatever. And it was all done to serve the story. Yeah, y a narrative and none of it was done to just shoehorn in a black person that has a strong or a gay person that it's just like it was hilarious. He was great in that movie.
He was so funny.
And that could be a toss away, a tossway roll by the way.
Yeah, but he made something well.
It's called The Dangerous Lives of Baltimore, Dangerous Lives Ultimate. Okay, I don't see it winning any awards.
Was kiaren Cochin he was in it? Was he not? I know? Fad Was he nominated? Was he nominated in any other ones? Uh?
It looks like they were up for Is he.
Ever nominated besides this one that he just won? I think he was. I thought it was that. I could be wrong. Well, maybe he won a Golden Globe or something.
Maybe maybe globe.
Yeah, all right, well that that's that's that's thanks for coming to two Cool Mom's review movies.
And let's get into doing what we do, right.
Could just bring up the list of the ten films that were nominated and and you read them and tell us if you even heard of it?
Got it? Okay? Okay, Well the we're gonna see if we Yeah.
I remember like always knowing the Oscars and always known every movie, like, oh I saw him and see and we watched.
I watched a lot of movies. I just don't know if I've seen a lot of this year's.
I just saw the Monkey in the movie theater.
Have you seen it? You love it?
Fucking one of the best films I've seen a long time. I loved it.
It's so good.
Okay.
Uh, these are the top ten. Well, these are the Academy Award for Best Picture nominee.
Yes, okay, okay for this year.
Yes, good one.
The Brutalist didn't say it. Heard of it architect something about Jewish. That's all I know, right that.
Something about right, he's he's a Jewish tagline.
Architects, something about Jewish. Comes see the Brutalist.
It's gonna win.
No, I didn't say. Wicked didn't say it. Dune Part two didn't say. I saw that it was nominated for that's crazy.
Wow, I saw that.
Okay, I didn't see what I would I will. I will see Wicked. I would have. I just haven't seen it yet. Wicked was one I wouldn't see. The Brutalist. I don't think I wouldn't see Doune two The Substance. Didn't see it.
I'm still here.
I'm still here as the one with the wait. I think I saw that. Who's I'm still here? What is still here? What's it?
It was in it? Uh?
He's caught off guard by Who's I have no idea.
I don't know. I'm still substance.
I saw you saw substance, Substance, give me more. What's her name one for it.
She won the Best Actress, not them, the other girl, Mickey Rooney, Mikey Marky McQuay.
That's her, Mikey Madison, Picky Vicky Markey Rooney won Best Apporting Actor for this Vicky Rooney mouse substance abuse.
Yeah, I'm still here.
Stars, Fernando Torres, Fernando Montenegroton mellow.
No, this is a trans one right? No? Is that the transport?
That's what's a trans one?
There's three trans ones.
That's the one with Jellie.
There's another trans Okay, I have nickel boys. What nickel boys, nickel back.
They're not the best picture. Nickel boys don't know it. Conclave, Conclave, that's when we talked about about the Pope.
A complete unknown.
That was the one with the.
Bob Dylan one.
I know that I haven't I know that I haven't seen it.
Amelia Perez.
That's the one about the transform, Okay, Zoe and Anora Anora there go and that's the one I won, right, aura A snor by.
The way, Bora, I would maybe I I've heard of five heard and that's fifty percent.
That's not bad though. That's passing in most states.
But how many of I think I've seen two?
Yeah, but how many of them have seen you?
Well, that's the name of my next specialist.
Complete Complete. Its gonna be a bora. Let's get in help here we go, let's do it. Mark. Do we have any questions from the people and the questions?
Questions?
Wonderful question Mark? Where do they submit their queries?
You can send it to us on two Cool Moms on the Instagram page or okay, the email it's too cool moms pot a Gmail.
Yes, well, buddy, you're also talking to us from the sh shadows. I don't know. I wouldn't like you.
I prefer to being complete dark.
You look like the banker on a Billionaire on what's that one? Who is the banker? What's show?
No dealer?
No no, no, no the banker like deal and no deal, no deal. Okay.
First question comes from Lauren. She says, I'm living on my own for the first time. What laundry settings do you use? So she she goes into and listen, I've been there. I think you guys have all been there. But she says hot, cold, warm, all these tumble settings tied? How many dryer sheets? I watch things online?
But I only trust my two cool moms.
I love you. I love you, I always have been.
Do you do your laundry?
Well I did for a while, but I don't do it anymore. Bessie won't let me do it.
She will not let you do this.
One of the things she does. She's just like she does a laundry. She's like, I got laundry. Like I try to wash the kids clothes sometimes, like you try, how about And she's like, no, that's nice, Yeah, well is it?
What do you have to do?
Though?
If she's doing that, if she's like I'm taking this, there's there's something she's got to be kicking.
I'm mostly on.
Dog duty when I'm home, making sure the dogs aren't tear in the house party list. When I'm downstairs with them, they are way calmer, they'll nap and when they won't get any trouble. As many accidents in the house. So she likes me to be down I think she just wants me to be away from her.
Another thing about she does all the upstairs.
No, I'm kidding, she like what I do a lot of that dog stuff I do, you know, the garbage stuff. You know, for the most part, I do that and then I'll move boxes a lot, like the Amazon packages come in. The Amazon packages come in, and get them from the outside.
Go oh good, something awesome again. Yeah, we get a box cutter. That's you're that's that you're.
Not it's not awesome, like it's like sometimes it's like it's dog food's you know, it's not what do you think is coming to the house.
It's not Christmas, you know, it's essentials. It's paper towels. When am I hoping it up? Don't you go grocery shopping?
No?
Never, who goes grocery instagart?
She have everything delivered, all delivered like a uh on, like a schedule.
No, No, they did. The in laws. They are in Georgia. Peaches.
I love grocery shop. I love it.
I love the supermarket. She hates them really. Yeah.
I love finding what we're gonna eat that week. To I'm like, oh, let's plant it out. Let me get my ingredients. Chicken pacada.
You made a pocada.
I know how to do it. It's now my favorite dish to make.
Nice.
Yeah, it's a lot of work, but I love making it.
Gotta make it a pokada. Gott a pocada.
That's what they say all the time when you're in you make out of chicken, you gotta vocada. Okay, But the name of the episode got a pakada.
Write it down, that's what it is. I will say this about dry, about laundry.
I'm I learned early on hot towels, cold everything else, what Mike drop No whites, whites get hot. Hey, listen, I want to bring color into this. I don't want to try to divide the country like you do all the time.
We get it, you're edgy.
Colors are not okay, Listen, I don't care what color you are. If your towel yat, you're a hot towel, and if you're not a towel, you cold.
That's it.
That's it.
I don't see anything else besides I.
Put my whites in, I put a dash of bleach. I put it on hot. Uh, coloreds cold, that's it. Colors, colors, colors, color colors, what colored clothing?
Color clothing is right, But the setting is colors. Coloreds. You said coloreds like you're like you're a grandfather in Georgia. Colors. This whole question, now, the whole question's gotta go.
I didn't pikatta. I gotta I gotta remember takata.
No, it's yeah, how about you have you ruined with wrong settings? I've ruined so many clothes. In the beginning, I washed a suit.
Hey, I had no idea.
I threw my suit was in the washing machine.
I had no idea.
You had to dry clean it. And then I dried it and it was like zinc And I go, oh, no, my father's like, you fucking it up. Of course, you absolute moron.
Yeah, I had no idea.
I had no idea.
I used to do laundry with the kid, me and Justin. We lived in uh, you know, La two thousand and three five. You know, so it's the first time I really used a laundry machine in a building. For the most part, most of the time, I would always have my laundry and in the in the unit or whatever. And I remember like going down there and I saw I was like loading him the clothes, and I saw this girl come down and she just had a It was just she clearly spilt like red wine or something all over like it was like an aerical rug.
Right, she was jamming the rug in a washing machine like Jimmy and I was like, and I was like, oh okay, and then she like put it on and left and I remember the machine going.
I was like, because all the weight got shifted, right, yeaheah with the tumbles. I just started smoking.
I was at your twenties right there, right, you don't know, Yeah, you can't do that.
You thrown suits in?
What have you ruined?
I am not very good on when it comes to the heat settings. I shrink a lot of stuff. I blame the dryer, but I think I also expand at the same time when I watched things, So I like, I just yelled at best because I.
Said best, Actually, you shrunk my favorite Yeah, you shrunk my favorite white. I have a long, sly white T shirt. I was like, I shrunk my favorite white. She goes, I hung dry that. She's like, you're just getting fat, Like Mike dropped and walked out.
And like, well, I remember this. I was dating this girl in Los Angeles when I was first kind of like working there before I moved there, spelled red one on a rug. Well she uh, she was a bit of a slob, right, So there was clothing all over a place, so I guess it all all the clothing up. I put it in two laundry bags. I brought it to a drop and wash, right, I said, I like to, you know, wash all this, all these clothing, all the clothing. And then it was like, you know, it was a big chunk of clothing. Sorry, I bring it back. Everything's folded, everything's sordid. And she was like, oh no, and I was like what, She's like, half the stuff you can't wash. Oh no, it's like, oh my god. I literally ruined have her fucking wardrobe. And I was like, I was like, great, now I got to take you shopping, like like like I'm not Richard Gear, but we'll go shopping. Yeah, oh my god.
That like you should try not just being a disgusting ping and leaving yourself everywhere.
I'm sorry, I should just picked it up and swept and dusted and instead the I think.
The dry sheets are bullshit. We dry sheet. I don't do dry sheets. I think that's I think that's marketing.
The snuggle Bonnie that had the snuggle Little how us just a little bear, so I'll snuggly your clothes so snugly bullshit, It doesn't work that way.
Fabric softener, Yeah, yeah, what is it what is it softening?
Is it fab Is it softening the fat fabrics? Well, it's in the title.
How how's it? How can you soften what's already made?
I know it's just chemicals. It's breaking down the dirt further to bring it back to its national natural form.
You know, I've always called you the closest I'll get to talk an elon musk.
Is you?
That's right? Because you break everything down? You know it all I do.
I'm able to answer with a lie. The wealth of knowledge that I make up all the time. I know it's not snugly. So I would tell her hot if it's a towel, cold if it's not.
Don't use the dry sheets bullshit, I say, white, hot colors very good? Uh cold? Don't put too much in?
Yeah, less is more, less is more, for sure.
A dash of bleach with the whites.
They listen to Katie Berry. You're hot in your cold?
You know.
D sheets could go down? All right, here we go, all right, give us another marking.
And people use dryer sheets to reduce static.
That's Oh.
Have you ever done laundry and you don't use dry street and you get the static actions or like the sweatshirt feels like.
I'm like this my body and I blame the sweatshirt. Okay.
Next question comes from Lynn Lynn is spending money?
Oh?
Is spending money on upgrading plane seats?
Worth it?
I have a long flight and am struggling with the extra money required to move up. Is the money better spent on experiences on my trip or the upgraded seat?
What you asked, dipshit right here went to Australia, wouldn't splurge?
Mark went to Australia from New.
Believable economy an economy mind on economy minus to Australia.
I will I will say that there is like that flight was so long that they treated me like economy plus. I will say I got there was some luxury features. I got a blanket, the meals were good.
But I think part of part of the trip on a long trip like that, the flight is part of it. It sets your tone for the whole trip, whether you choose to think it or not. And some of the best experiences that I've had, I've been in first class in those little cubicles, and I'll never forget. I flew like quantus uh to Malaysia and it was single handily. The flight was as good as the trip. I got my cubicle, i'd my blankie. I'm watching multiple movies. I ordered hummus. I ordered six rounds of hummus. I've never eaten that much hummus in my life. The Peeda pockets were so fresh and so soft.
I was like sinking, I'll do another fabric.
I bet you they used fabrics. Give me a robe, give me his slipsteps. I will say this, though I would splurge. I think it's more important to splurge on the way to vacation than on the way home. It'll set the tone. It'll be nice. You get there, you're all relaxed up. You know.
The only time that I don't is on the way home is if I'm doing cross country and the hours is like if I'm doing a red eye or whatever. I'll always try to get a live flat or something like that. That's always worth the money. But besides that, for me, on the way too is really important.
Domestic I don't care because domestic I'll fall asleep. Yeah, I'm always asleep on a play.
Having kids fucked me. Fuck the whole experience.
We used to fly Jet Blue Mint all the time, right up the top and I kid, get the four seats to me and Bessie's great. Now you're talking multiple grants. Get the fire having these kids now now I'm all the way in the back. Now we have to get a row all together. So it's always the bat. I'm on thirty six.
It's the worst.
Having kids ruined it off the air from.
Oh please your delta, I know.
You no, but jetpolue the Caribbean. I can't all the time. Mosaic if you need.
It, jep Blue, Drew, you have a TV. Now everybody's got.
To Now I got TV. That's what they did.
But they're they're hub bat JFK, which is nice. So but the thing about the Jet Blue experience is they call it the Jet Blue.
Experience and you're like, oh, what is this?
And mosaic is their thing instead of okay, I'm listening, Hello, tell me it's fancy.
I need a paintbrush. But I will say the mint cubicle is still is up there for me.
They have a cubicle on the Jet Blue seater.
I have to tell you a story about when Drew Berry warmed. I tell you the story.
No, I go, I'm flying Mint Home from playing Mint Home from l a Red Eye. I get into Mint thing it was sold out. I tried to change my seat because I didn't have Mint blue. Mint is Mint is the first class cabin, so it's the live flat. And the way they do it is two seats together, then a single seat, two seats, single seat, two seats. Okay, so it's like, oh, all right, five rows of greatness, you get a mini, you get the they call that the cubicle.
By yourself. They call it a solo. So I'm like, oh, I want to get a solo. I look, I can't change. It's all sold out.
I get out on the plane. I'm by myself in Mint, by myself, back right corner. I'm like, what's going on here? To move one of these seats? I look on the app again, can't change my seat. Three minutes before we take off, Drew Barrymore gets on with everybody else that's sitting in Mint as part of her entarage.
So it's Drew Barrymore and all her people and me and you. Drew Barrymore is in the scene in front of me. Okay, how long go is this? By the way, this is two thousand and.
Twelve eleven, she was just getting divorced. So this is pre jokers, no no, no, no, post jokers to Night two, seventeen eighteen. She was just getting divorced. Okay, okay, soever, yeah, I are, I could afford mint. So I get up to the front there and then I have to go potty. So the girls over here and I'm like, excuse me, Drew's in front of me.
I get up. I was excuse me, how to go potty?
I go and I Drew is sleeping and I one of my aarpods fall out into her nestled I thing.
And I'm like, oh fuck.
So I go to the bathroom. Now I'm going peepiece and I'm like, what am I gonna do here? I'm like, I can't not, so I go. I'm like, you know what, it's fine. I just won't watch. I'll try to fall asleep. I go fall back asleep. Okay.
I wake up to a full blown party meeting. Drew was in the corner, emotional about something. They're all talking, her friends are consoling her, and she's talking, and there's.
Just about the time when she was going through some stuff. So I guess it's that I'm not listening. I just woke up.
I still had the thing on, and I look and I'm like, oh, I'm like, now's the perfect time for me to look for.
My air pod.
And Drew Burron was empty mint seat, so I'm like looking over the thing, like trying to like find it, like what, but not go into her stuff because she has like a bag there. But she's kind of distracted at this point because they're all she's liking. She's like filled up and they're like petting her back, and I'm like, she's into it, so I don't want to.
Be like going to like stealing the wallet. So I'm like, there's no easy way to do this.
There's no easy way to do this.
So I'm just like you and they're like what, and I'm like, nah, sorry, I'm trying to get I dropped an air pod. And she's like, oh, yeah, of course gets You're super sweet. She's like, oh, of course get it. And I got it. I found it and got it, and I just and that was the last moment. Oh, no vibes, No vibes. She was super sweet, really nice.
Uh but they you know, when they got on, they were all very fun in public, but I was just like, oh, this is so weird, and I was like, oh, it's Drew Barrymore and all our friends.
No vibes though, huh, no vibes you guys.
Being good should be run up right in my alley. Very We're both focused on kindness, kindness. We're both touchy feely, like we levet to, you know, make sure everybody's okay, well, very positive, well, very positive people. Both could lose an air pod and then ass crack.
Anybody could do that. Anybody, anybody me me the Berry Moore, anybody, I love Jersky. All right, that's all the time we had.
Thanks so much for we did it, wedde it.
Thank you so much for listening to Too Cool Moms to Cool.
Moms pod at gmail dot com.
Please follow us like more importantly, just you know, tell people to listen, just say we got so much knowledge to give.
Yeah, it's all bad, but you know what, we're trying to do our best.
We are Jiggy. Where can people find you at Jiggy Comedy.
That's great. I'm on tour right now. Come out and see us. Always torn, Yeah, I'm always torn.
I'm I'm at Joe Gattowofficial dot com for my tour dates Stevie Byrne.
Punch Up dot Live. I am on my new tour this year called No More Mister Rice Guy.
Yeah, love it, come on out. And then also, don't forget Pittsburgh.
Pittsburgh July eighteenth.
You want all the two comambers in the house. Yeah, it's gonna be a lot of fun.
It's gonna be the last. Absolutely. Rivers Casino July eighteenth, Rivers Casino dot com. I believe Pittsburgh, so yeah, fantastic. Thank you, Joseph, thank you.
