Hello and welcome to another episode of the Perception Podcast with me your host Caroline Partridge. In today's episode I'm joined once again by relationship expert and trauma specialist Sally Baker. Sally breaks down the not so obvious downside of online dating, the red, amber and beige flags to be aware of, exactly how the phenomena of ghosting, cuffing, breadcrumbing and firedooring diminish our self esteem and ultimately mental health, and the ramifications of the Covid pandemic on dating trends. She shares why you shouldn't start dating in autumn or winter months, and discloses the dating trend that is throwing online dating sites into mass panic. So please join me as we look a life through a different lens. 

KEY TAKEAWAYS

• Online dating platforms are seeing a downturn in subscribers due to user dissatisfaction with behaviours like "breadcrumbing" and "ghosting," which negatively impact self-esteem and mental health.
• There's a growing trend towards meeting people in real life through shared interests and activities, providing more authentic connections and context.
• The COVID-19 pandemic has significantly impacted dating trends, relationship dynamics, and people's overall approach to socialising.
• "Cuffing season" occurs in autumn and winter, when people lower their standards for companionship during colder months, often leading to spring breakups.
• Slow dating, which gained popularity during the pandemic, involves taking more time to get to know potential partners before meeting in person.
• Meeting people out of context through online dating can be risky; using intuition and being aware of red flags is crucial for safety.
• Doing personal growth work and developing self-worth before dating can lead to healthier relationships and better partner choices.
• Shifting focus from internal to external landscapes by engaging in volunteer work or group activities can improve overall well being and increase chances of meeting like-minded individuals.

BEST MOMENTS

"What's happening in the world of online dating is that all of the dating platforms are seeing a downturn in the number of subscribers. So their business model isn't growing exponentially as it was. It's diminishing."

"My first word of advice is never do it in autumn and winter. It's too cold, it's too dark. Wait till spring."

"It's about having, having a big life, and having a big life. And you're right, lots of people are, their, their friendships. Groups are established and those people are often in couples and I would actually encourage my friends to pimp for me."

"We've become very fearful and we've made our lives much smaller."

"When you shift focus to the external landscape, and that's the world around you, that's connection, that's when you thrive."

ABOUT THE GUEST

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Sally Baker APAQAM

Sally is a highly experienced licensed and accredited award winning therapist, writer and speaker. She sees adults and young people face to face in London and worldwide via Zoom. She is trained to an advanced or master practitioner level in many of the latest therapeutic approaches all of which work rapidly and powerfully to resolve a wide range of presenting issues, and she leads workshops on resilience, achieving peak performance and how to recover from trauma and PTSD. Through her therapy work she is often in demand for her expert opinion on human behaviour and is frequently quoted in the international press, magazines, BBC Radio and influential on-line media platforms. 

Sally has written several books on key aspects of therapy: ‘7 Simple Steps to Stop Emotional Eating', ‘How to Feel Differently About Food', ‘The Getting of Resilience From The Inside Out' : https://amzn.eu/d/2ArYDFU 

Socials & Contact

sally@workingonthebody.com 

www.workingonthebody.com

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