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How Can We Trade Online Time for In-Person Relationships?

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The King of Kings loved the world enough to perform demeaning tasks during His earthly ministry, serve a meal to impart spiritual truths, and ultimately sacrifice Himself. At the very least, can we not offer someone a cup of coffee or a glass of tea? Opened doors and shared meals will open hearts, lift burdens, and forge lasting friendships. 

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Trading Online for In-Person Relationships

By: Laura Bailey 

“The LORD God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.’ "  Genesis 2:18 NIV

I recently listened to a talk by Sherry Turkle called Connected, But Alone, which made me think: Why do we hide behind our phones, texting instead of calling? Why do we meet people at Starbucks or Panera Bread instead of inviting them to our house? Why do we freely share opinions through our Facebook statuses but can barely manage a face-to-face conversation for more than five minutes? 

 We are more connected than ever, but study after study shows that we are the loneliest generation. Why is this? People lack meaningful relationships, which they desperately need. People need a personal relationship with God for ultimate wholeness, but humans also need relationships, real connections, with other human beings.

So if we know that God designed us to commune with others, especially to fellowship with other Believers, why do we neglect to open our hearts and homes to one another?

Admittedly, I  suffer from the “Martha complex.”   When the hostess wants everything to be perfect for guests, she fails to enjoy the guests themselves.  Time after time, I’ve told myself that one day, when I have a bigger house, more excellent furniture, or even something as silly as a good-smelling hand soap (sadly, that is a true story, but for another day),  I will then invite more people over. 

 Images of homes in magazines make me feel like my house is not “up to par,” not quite “guest-ready,” which is just a lie Satan uses to prevent us from practicing hospitality, one of the best ways to show God’s love to the lost and broken world all around us.   For you, it may not be your home exactly; perhaps you are unsure about what to cook, or you fear no one will accept your invitation, or maybe you simply feel too tired to tidy up. But, friends, we have to stop making excuses because  God’s Word is replete with verses that command us to be hospitable.

Being in sales for nine years, almost every day, I heard the mantra, “Relationships matter.”  It is vital to build trust and to connect with clients from the very first meeting.  One of the best ways to do this is by eating meals together.  My manager told us “to break bread”  with our clients. Often. That term reminded me of Jesus breaking loaves of bread with His hands to feed the thousands gathered around Him.  He understood the importance of feeding His followers both spiritually and physically.  His disciples wanted to send them away, but Jesus replied, “They do not need to go away. You give them something to eat.”  Matthew 14:16 Jesus wanted to show his disciples two truths: first, He was in control of the situation, and second, feeding the crowd under those extraordinary circumstances would make a lasting impression. 

Reaching out to join someone for lunch or to invite someone into your home for a meal takes time, energy, and money. It’s much easier to order take-out, stream Netflix, and scroll through Facebook in your pajamas. Taking time to listen to others and be open with them reveals God's compassionate character. People see how much we care about them when we extend our arms to draw them close, ultimately demonstrating how much God values them and desires an intimate relationship with them.

 Our enemy wants us to put off inviting that coworker to dinner or starting a Bible study in our homes because he knows that through the Holy Spirit working in us, lost souls will come to Jesus, and hurt hearts will be healed. 

  So, I encourage you to meet a friend for a cup of coffee, invite that new family at church over for lunch, or simply sit on your front porch (or back) with a neighbor, soaking in some rays and drinking iced tea while in good conversation.  You may miss a few updates, but the time spent in one-on-one fellowship is well spent and will make you forget all about your #fomo (fear of missing out).

Intersecting Faith and Life:

Think for a minute. The King of Kings loved the world enough to perform demeaning tasks during His earthly ministry, serve a meal to impart spiritual truths, and ultimately sacrifice Himself. At the very least, can we not offer someone a cup of coffee or a glass of tea? Opened doors and shared meals will open hearts, lift burdens, and forge lasting friendships. Who can you invite to feel the love of Christ today?

For Further Reading:

6 Ways to Rethink Biblical Hospitality in a Busy World

1 Peter 4:7-11

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