The Bright SideHow to Throw a Perfect Holiday Party with Lizzy Mathis
This episode originally aired on Dec. 2, 2024. How do you throw a great holiday party? Do you pick a theme? Keep the invite list short, or invite everyone you know? What makes a good tradition? Lizzy Mathis is the founder and editor-in-chief of The Cool Mom Co., and co-host and executive producer of “Honest Renovations,” Roku’s home improvement series. She joins the show today to talk about hosting holiday parties, entertaining tricks, and more!
Hey fam, Hello Sunshine, and Happy New Year's Eve. Today, on the bright Side, we're going back to our recent conversation with the cool mom herself, Lizzie Mathis. From hosting to decor to Delicious Dishes, Lizzie's here to give us the recipe on how to host the most memorable gathering. It's Tuesday, December thirty. First, I'm Danielle Robe and.
I'm Simone Voice, And this is the bright Side from Hello Sunshine, a daily show where we come together to share women's stories, laugh, learn, and brighten your day. Well, as the clock ticks down tonight, I wonder if any of you are like me right now, running around last minute trying to gather all the perfect ingredients for a memorable New Year's Eve party. But beyond fancy cocktails and orators and all that, what does it really take to create an experience that guests will remember long after they leave. Well that's where Lizzie Mathis comes in. She's our guest today and a woman who knows all about turning spaces and moments into something truly special. Lizzie's the co host and executive producer of Honest Renovations, a show that brings real, beautiful change to homes and families alongside her bestie Jessica Alba.
Plus, Lizzie's also the star.
Of Dinner Party People, where she helps hosts transform their dream dinner parties into unforgettable experiences.
So, in addition to hosting incredible gatherings, Lizzie is also the founder and editor in chief of the Cool Mom co and the host of the Cool Mom Code podcast.
Basically, Lizzie makes everything cool.
She is just the most fun person to be around and has incredible perspective on hosting and offers really simple yet effective ways to take your party from ho home to home run.
Yes, I said that and I mean it.
Lizzie Masses, Welcome to the bright Side.
Oh thank you for having me.
We're so happy to have you.
Look, I'm looking at two very bright, shiny faces today.
I was going to say the same thing about you, and it's not every day that we get to have a friend on the.
Yeah, that's sweet.
I love you girls. I'm so proud of you. I'm really happy that you guys are doing this and bringing sunshine to people on a daily basis. This is really cool.
Thank you well, we owe you a big congrats because we heard that you're getting renewed for season three of Honest Renovations.
Amazing. Congratulations on that show.
Well, you know, you know.
How you have like some of those quiet days. Yeah, I don't have those on the show.
You don't have those in general?
I do. I do. Actually, if you talk to my husband, I have very quiet days. See thinks that I am home like I'm just the most silent person ever, but out and about like when I'm around like energy and like you know, the show I do brings something out of me and I just have a good time. Season two is out. Our holiday episode dropped a couple weeks ago.
One quick question about the holiday episode. Yeah, because you guys have done so many seasons of Reno's, what's the difference between a reno and a holiday renovation.
Well, the holiday episode were geared a lot towards the holidays. Obviously, this specific Holiday family was just really special because they had seven kids, all of them brilliant like either musically or in science and the arts and mathematics, and three were away at college and so four in the house and they love the holidays. But within their home they would have like sixty people over something like wild right six zero six zero, and their space was like moderately spaced, And so our goal was to come in to try and figure out how do we won bring this family for their day to day lives. How do we make their house work more for them and for the kids that come back sometimes for the summer or come back in and out from college. But then also the four that are there all the time and going through their daily lives with mom and dad. How do we make mom and dad feel super special? How do we make their breakfast, to their dinner, to their holiday party all feel great and fit in this space? And so that's what makes it such a special holiday episode.
Okay, Simone, I have a question for you.
When you first saw Lizzie and her husband Lisa together, did you think how are two like? How are two beautiful people in this relationship creating three beautiful children?
They're like, it's a model family.
Oh yeah, oh yeah. The jeans are off the charts in this family.
But I will say no, I was not surprised because I knew that they.
Were both models. So when you know that, that makes a lot of sense.
That's the models entrepreneurs. Yes, lots of titles and.
The titles, all the titles, but you know, at the heart of it, to be honest with you, when I met Lisa, I was just so lucky to meet someone whose values literally coincided with mine almost every point. And that's what we've built a foundation on. To be honest with you, it just happens to me that he looks good in the making, Like that's that's.
All My dress is so cool?
Oh God, please, that's all me.
Girl back.
Okay, So you and your husband been moved from New York. You're originally from Michigan, but you moved from New York to LA and you have three kids, you have a new home. Like you guys are kind of starting over in some ways, but you're creating these new holiday traditions, and I'm curious how you're spending your Christmas.
Not really starting over. We've Easa and I've been together for almost what twenty years? This is what I will say. This is what I will say. No matter where you are, whether you're in a new home, whether in you'r a new space, a new city, no matter where you are, the beautiful thing about traditions is that they follow you. That that's what makes you feel like any place you are is home. So a lot of times we'll go back and we'll spend like if we get two weeks off for the holidays, the kids off swim school and things, that we'll spend a week in New York because New York does feel so much like home for us, and we will do a lot of like holiday traditions there. But even if we're in LA it doesn't matter. But one of the things I think is interesting is just me and Lisa bringing our traditions together and now doing it with right now with kids, it feels so much more rich and so much more festive, and everything through their eyes is so exciting. And holidays have become not have become I've been a mom for like twelve years ago by, but holidays are just they're at fun.
And you're spending Christmas with your co host, Jessica Albo.
This yere So jess and I we've spent Christmas together for like the last like four years or something crazy like that. It started obviously because jess and I were so close and our families are close, and so she has a huge family and I have a very small family. So I just always loved being around all this love and people and energy, and they turn it out. There's like different Christmas trees all over the place. There's like black Sanna's and brown Sanna's everywhere. I remember the first time I walked in, I said, is what's up of all these brown Santas? She said, well, how else do you see me? Like? How else do you want it to be?
Like?
It just comes natural, and so it's always just a really fun, festive time. And then when my mom passed, that was super hard because it felt like such a lack of family, Like she was like the nucleus on a lot of those holidays. And so Jess's family was a really sweet place to be because they were so rooted in family.
That's really sweet that you have that.
It's nice in la like when you're a transplant anywhere to feel like you have a home.
Yes, to feel like you have that support system and that love, and like you can still experience the holidays how they're meant to be experienced.
You We have to take a quick break, but don't go anywhere. We'll be right back with Lizzie Mathis. And we're back with Lizzie Mathis.
You talk about your mom, And I wonder if you had a similar experience to me growing up. Maybe not, but I watched my mom host these really magical gatherings around the holidays, and she just was known in our com unity as someone who made everyone feel welcome. And she had this warmth that immediately when you walked in the door, like he felt like you were home. What did you see modeled for you in terms of how gatherings were hosted in your home?
Just that I mean, it is exactly that same experience. My mom loved community. She was a single mom, three kids, and she just wanted people to come over all the time. My mom would always have a plate of food and cooking. And my mom would literally be like baking chicken or making fish or mac and cheese or greens or whatever, and she'd call people and be like, Hey, I'm cooking, come through. See that's how we got to play.
I miss that. I missed the spontaneous, like I'm going to come through and.
Chicago Everyone's and everybody's door.
I love that. I missed that.
I think that's and so that's how I grew up. And so the holidays felt extra special because she would have an apron on instead of just her her sweater. And she would be in there and there would be garland everywhere, and you know, things that remind you of Christmas trees and Doile's and all things, right and so, and she would bring out the fine china.
Right, it would be like.
These beautiful gold leafed platters and all these things. It felt, it felt special, and the holidays felt like something that you were like meant to remember. And I don't think I can piece together a negative experience during the holidays. That was her moment. Those were her moments to shine.
Do you try and host the way she did? Are you a different kind of host?
You know, I'm a different kind of host. I'm not so stuck on like the fine china and making sure that the you know, and the crystal is out and all these things.
All that that's also generational too, right, rational.
Right, But although these things have been passed down to me, but it's hard going back there into the shed to pull them out one time a year and all like, don't break it. Yeah, And then I'm like looking at my six year old and I'm like two hands, two hands, two hands.
It's this rough, grandma.
Yeah, these are come on now, Okay, this is unreplaceable. But I think that I the core of it, the excitement of having people come over and being able to feed them and show love through food and community, that feels the same, That feels rooted in what I was raised with, right, and so that I always get excited about.
It's interesting that you bring up the aesthetics versus the emotion of the gathering, and I think the emotion that your guests have when they leave your home that's the most important thing, right, It's not that they sip champagne out of fine china or they ate off of Grandma's plate. I know that you think about meaning too whenever you're planning a gathering. So what do you think is the difference between curating just a fun, spirited holiday party versus a holiday gathering that truly is imbued with meaning.
I think that depends on a lot. I think it depends on who is at the party too, right, Like, is this just a social gathering where it's just a couple of friends and you have them coming over and you guys do an activity or is it like something that is rooted in family and like tradition and like you know, So I think that kind of just depends on your guest list.
Where do you start with it? I think that you like, do you start with decor.
I think you have to start one with what you're doing? Right? So mom, like you have to start with what kind of event do I want to host? Is this going to be something where I'm just inviting some of my friends over and we're just going to catch up, or is this going to be something where I'm inviting like my family over and we are doing a holiday tradition that we do every single year. This is something that like it's clockwork right, like we know and we expect it. So I think you got to start with who the guest list looks, like, what are you trying to achieve? From there? I think you pick out a theme, right, It's all about like what your vibe, what energy you want to have at the event.
Like at the party, my friend Michelle taught me something that I thought was so brilliant because is one of my pet peeves at gatherings is when you invite a bunch of people somewhere who don't really know each other, and you want them to meet each other, but there's nothing to facilitate that interaction because people leave without ever really connecting. And then it was like, what's the point. So she said a friend of hers did this. She wrote note cards with a name on one side, on the other side it was like a fun fact about that person, and then she laid them all out on the table when you walked in, and you had to pick up a note card not your own, of somebody else and go find them at the party and read them the fun fact. And that way you got to meet each other, which I thought was absolutely brilliant.
It was so prea Parker. It's like a human scavenger hunt.
Yes, yeah, it was so great, And I was thinking, like, what are things like that that can help us break the ice? Like you have friends from so many different walks of life. When you bring them together, what do you do to make them connect?
I like that idea, though, just like at the time, Yeah, but didn't are you just drink with that person the entire dinner party?
Well, I think everybody like, comes, you're not at seven pm?
You're not it?
You're not it?
Who is Jenny?
Where is j.
I love that idea though, and I think my idea kind of falls along that same line is that you never sit someone who knows someone else next to each other at the party.
Oh no, no, no, I don't like that.
I know, And let me tell you why. I go to a ton of dinner parties and dinners like a ton, and whenever I sit next to anyone I know, the entire night, I see nothing else but you, and I zone in on you, and I'm like, okay, let's get into it, and then we just catch up. And before I know it, I haven't talked to the host, I haven't talked to the person you know across from me. And you don't get as stuck with people that you don't know, right, So I'm talking to the person to my left, to my right, across from me, diagonal from me, and now we're talking. Now we're in a group setting, and so now your ears are a little bit more open, and you're connecting with so many more people, which is also very terrifying, because if you're at a dinner party where you don't know a lot of people, it can push you out of a comfort zone.
I think it depends on, like where my social battery is as I'm heading into that event. If I'm drained and I don't have the energy to like hold a conversation.
That can be tough. But I agree with you. If you drain and you can have.
Then you got to stay home. But you have to know that about yourself though, right, because I'm the same way. Yeah, when I'm drained and I just can't take it, I'm like, nah, I'm good. I'm just gonna sit this one.
Out because you're like, I need to be with my comfort friends. I need to be with somebody that I know.
Right, Yeah, that's when you call it. That's all. Ditch it and go to difference. That's true.
Oh my god, that's I want to ask you about curating the guest list because I feel like this is a common debate when we talk about hosting. Do you invite everyone or do you maintain the sense of generous authority and be selective about having the right mix of people there.
Generous authority is a new term.
That's not my term. I can't take that any for it. No, it's just I can't remember authority. It's this idea of as the party planner, you are allowed to exercise a measure of authority that is generous because you're saying I'm creating this space for the evening, like this world for the evening, and I'm inviting you into it, and with part of that comes a responsibility on my end to curate the best experience for you.
This is the interesting part though, because normally, when you're creating a guest list, you only have a certain number of spots to fill rightly. Yeah, so this is always very difficult, especially for people who know a lot of people, yes, and who want to mix it up. For me, I think it is depending upon once again, let's go back to our theme or why we're even hosting the dinner party in the first place, and you tie into how you think different people from different walks of life, different careers, different viewpoints or whatever it is, how they can feed into the greater good of the entire conversation, right and the entire dinner party. So does it make sense for them to be there? That's one I think when you also are bringing different people together, you want people to have takeaways, you want people to mix and mingle and meet new people, You want people to connect, and so I think you have to constantly remember and keep that in mind. Does this make sense for them to be here? And if it does, then yes, go for it. But if it doesn't, then they got to get cut. But that's the hardest part though, because people feel very affected when they're not invited to things, and so that's a hard one too.
It's hard, but I think we have to give ourselves permission to do it and just know that, like you.
Got to give yourself generous authority, exactly know that not everybody is meant to be at every single event I have.
Like my mom was so big on like inclusion that when I was a kid, she would make me have play dates.
With all the kids in the class that nobody wanted to play with.
Oh, I love her.
So I think it's so deeply ingrained in me. I can't stand the idea of leaving somebody out. It gives me like such agidave.
So then you can't host anything because you know way too many people.
I can't host. I'm a really good guest.
Yes, if I were to host, though, I would like to host like you.
You are a chill host with authority.
I don't like to put pressure. My biggest thing I hate when you walk into something and people are like, yes, so we're gonna have everyone get up and speak and like introduce you, and I'm like, why, like one, do you know how long it makes the dinner even with food and things like that. People don't want to eat when everyone's talking. So now we're going to go through thirty people, introduce ourselves and tell them everything about.
Us and do affirmations and.
Some people are super long winded and you're like, oh, come on, your cutoff time was good four minutes ago.
It's time for another short break. We'll be right back with Lizzie Mappis. And back with Lizzy Mappis.
Okay, we've been talking about people, but what about price, because I want to know how you achieve a great party without spending a ton of money.
Oh, just don't spend the money.
But how do you?
Because why don't you see your Instagram make things look really nice?
And you how do you know I'm not spending a lot of money, Danielle? How do you know?
Because no, because I know you and you spend money on certain things, right, you're thoughtful about spending on other things.
I think there's a few things that you can do. Lighting is always the most inexpensive way to create a vibe. Candles are so inexpensive to create a vibe. You can light candles all throughout the dinner table and it looks gorgeous foliage, like for fall, we're going into fall. We're in fall, we're going into the holiday foliage. We have so much nature outside that literally, if you just took a walk and picked up a whole lot of little green leaves or whatever it is, put them in a vase or spread them across the table, yes forage, e yes for urban table. Honey, like, I'm not even playing it all. It's just a beautiful way. And then that was like beautiful lighting is just boom and music. Music is also a great way to create a vibe. You put together a cute little playlist that is on point with what you're doing and who your people are. That's three major things right there, done taking care of and you haven't spent any money. Those are easy ways to achieve a really great dinner party. Now, if you're hosting an event and it's like an event event, then we're talking something different and you probably don't have to cough up that case.
I've never heard people say that, And those are great ideas.
Very language. I love your dinner party tips.
So you are my Martha Stewart.
Oh wow, I love this.
I look at your.
Instagram and I'm like, hmm, maybe I could make guacamole I've never tried before.
Are you serious?
Yes?
Oh my gosh.
I don't know how to make anything, but you make me think it's possible.
You do it very simply and it looks cute.
And I'm curious if you have any, like, any simple recipes that you think look fancy and look great for a dinner party.
I was thinking about this and I'm like, what is the ultimate dinner party menu? And it can be so different. It can be so different. It kind of depends on how involved of a host you want to be, or do you want to be in the kitchen. Those are decisions you have to make too. Do you want to be mingling with your guests or do you kind of want to be making sure that the food is perfected. I personally love a fish, you know, for dinner. The reason why is because it's so fast to make and it comes out hot and warm right, So when everyone has arrived, when everyone is settling in, you can dip out for ten minutes, go make a platter of fish, and back and you're done, and it's like hot food, ready to go. But I also love chilis and stews and like one pot meals for that kind of idea too, because you can let that go, go do your thing, and it's still right there when you get back and ready to serve for everybody to eat. I don't like things to be too complicated and too layered, because I truly believe that being in the kitchen should be a joyous activity. I really like my time in the kitchen, and I enjoy mixing different flavors and herbs, and I just like to play. It's a creative outlet for me.
Yeah.
What about when it comes to the actual holidays, have you learned any hacks in terms of navigating the pressures of the holiday season as a host?
It's like know who you are, right, like, know your personality. And I will compare this to new motherhood. Let's use that as an example. New motherhood, they tell you, hey, it's okay to ask or help. That's it, that's it done, and dash it's okay if you know who you are are and you know you're the type of person that gets a little overwhelmed, and like, I'm not the best planner either. So I am the type to be like on a Friday being like, Okay, what are we coicking on Sunday? I shed probably start pressing. My mom used to hate that about me because she was such a planner about it. She's like two weeks out, She's like, Okay, I'm going to the grocer store. I'd be like, what, Mama, But I think that's a sign of a veteran.
Yes, she likes she's been through war, she has been back.
She's literally she's gone to the grocery store and saw that sweet potatoes were out.
Yes, she like, not again, not this, not again, not this your satan.
Yeah, not again. Me, I'm like her sweet potatoes are out, Well, I guess we're having pumpkin. Then like, I'm like, okay, I guess we're shifting to this side. And she like she knew her recipe, she was down for them. Me, I'm like, okay, well, I guess we're gonna pivot. I guess it's I guess it's not Brussels sprouts. I guess we're gonna have broccoli.
I don't know, you know what I'm saying.
So I'm a little bit more on the fly like that. But I think you have to know your personality and I think you have to reach out for help. And that's really the beauty about it, right. It is about community and family and friends and all this. We still go home for Thanksgiving to my husband's family and they have so many family members. I used to get so overwhelmed. But his mom used to cook everything, and I used to be like, oh, come on, like how can we help, And one year she was like, listen, you take mac and cheese, you take the dressing, you take this, and everyone has their own assignments. It feels so communal because we're all in the kitchen doing random things, prepping for each other, and it's just it's amazing. And so I think you know who you are right, know your stress level, and remember why you're doing it. This is cool, Calm, easy, baby. This is the fun stuff. This is where we actually get to have fun and like relax and enjoy our time. This is not the stressful part. This is the part where we are supposed to like breathe in, breathe out, and enjoy the people who we choose to be around. This is the holidays. That is what it's for.
That just giving chills.
Mathis this is the holidays and looking at me with that intensity.
Okay, it's the holidays.
Eye contact.
Okay, as you wrap up a party and you're getting tired, the yawns are coming out.
Time to go.
It's time to go. I can't gotta go home. But what is your go to tactic for getting people out the door? This is so funny. This is this is a silly one.
This is where my husband's looking at me like making a strong eye contact. I'm like, okay, what do you want me to do? I think you have to be upfront beforehand. That's first. It's almost like communication with a partner, right. You got to tell them what you want beforehand and expect people not to read your mind, because that's just what it is when you're sending out or when you're telling people come over for dinner. We're gonna wrap up, probably closer than nine because we have to get in bed and we have to get up early to do the kid thing. So just want to make sure we're all aware.
I love when people put like an end time on the dash, like yeah, from seven to nine.
But my problem is that sometimes people don't they don't follow that at all. That's the hard part. When you're out and about, people don't always follow the nine.
You're saying, like they at your parties.
Now just so no, no, no, I'm just talking about my parties. I think you say, hey, I'm good. I'd listen. All right, this was fun. Gotta go, like, hey, everybody love you, you are leftovers, we have anything you need something to take home with you. All right, I'll see you next weekend. Like That's where I'm at, gotta go. But I think at events sometimes it's so hard because I've been at so many things where it's like they say you're going to wrap up by nine, and dinner's just coming out, like the main course is just coming out at eight forty five. I'm like, there's no way I'm out of hood nine.
Yeah, you know, like why is? Why is goodbye awkward?
It's like, I got how would you do it in the least awkward way possible?
I just am really blunt about it?
So what are you like?
I'm always like, this was so fun, thank you for having me.
I have to wake up early, so I'm gonna head out bye.
I think that's great. That's revolutionary. Now, what if people were at your house.
Oh my god, thanks for coming, see you later.
It's no, I don't believe me.
There's no way she's at dinner. There's no way she's at dinner. People's plates are still on the table. What do you mean she's like kicking them out, She's like this, what's fun? Thanks everybody.
Bye.
No, it's no way.
No, that's not what I thought you guys said.
If you're hosting, you got to be prepared for people to stay late.
See see.
But this is the thing, this is we're trying to figure out the most sensitive way to get people to I think.
You have to be upfront. I think early on you have to be upfront. You have to be like, this is the end time. And once it starts hitting in that time, like say it's nine, once a nine ten hits, you're like, all right, hey, guys, this is oh my god.
You guys have those excuses. You have children, we do.
Children's a great excuse. Early call times work, that's a great excuse too. Are you kidding me?
Yeah?
People, I don't ever let people know that I actually don't have to be here till ten am.
I think I have a job where I'm up at five.
Well, your secrets now going out to the massive.
You know it's great, A great, great one. I have a guyo examine.
Gotta go exam eight.
Ao, Lizzie, this was the best. Thanks so much for hanging out on the bright Side with us.
Yeah, I'm so glad to be here. Guys, thanks for having me.
We'll be watching your instagram for all your holiday joy.
Thank you, thank you.
Lizzie Mathis is the founder and editor in chief of the Cool Mom co. She's also the co host and executive producer of Roku's home improvement series Honest Renovations.
That's it for today's show.
Tomorrow on the bride Side, we are throwing it back to our very first conversation with Cleiah Shearer and Joanna Teplin, of course, the masterminds behind the Home Edit and co host of the reboot of Extreme Makeover Home Edition. Join the conversation using hashtag the bright Side and connect with us on social media at Hello Sunshine on Instagram and at the bright Side Pod on TikTok Oh, and feel free to tag us at Simone Boyce and at Danielle Robe.
Listen and follow the bright Side on the iHeartRadio app Apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.
See you tomorrow, folks, keep looking on the bright side.
