The holidays can be super stressful for queers, which is why Gabe and Chris are back for a special episode full of tips for how to stay safe, sane, and sexually active over the season with the help of Sniffies! First up, RuPaul’s Drag Race icon Kandy Muse spills some very hot tea about her most outrageous Sniffies experiences while touring the globe. Then, for anyone thinking of throwing their own holiday party, the co-founder of NYC’s beloved Papi Juice nightlife and art collective, Oscar Nñ, shares the lessons he’s learned creating positive, uplifting spaces for QTPOC to come together over the past 11 years. Finally, Gabe heads over to Animal in Brooklyn on the wildest gay night of the year - Thanksgiving Eve - to hear hot and heartwarming home-for-the-holidays hookup stories.
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Guests featured in this episode:
Kandy Muse
Oscar Nn
instagram.com/papijuicebk
Animal
Hey, viewers.
Sniffy's Cruising Confessions is an explicit podcast about queer sex, filter dirty words, and unfiltered descriptions of sexual activities. If hearing about orgies, anonymous sex, kink, fetish, and more offends your sensibilities, you might want to skip this. Viewer discretion is advised. It's definitely not for kids.
So, Gabe, so Chris, we are so back. Oh? Is that what we're doing right now? Yeah? I had no idea.
I've just been living here since season one. Yeah. No, I'm really excited that we are back. I have missed you so much. I have missed you so much. Yeah, and we've certainly gotten a lot of feedback from our viewers.
Yes.
I do find that I get recognized in like very gay spaces, but always outside of New York.
Oh.
I was in LA and someone mentioned something I was traveling to like Atlanta for work, and someone also was like, do you.
Do the podcast?
I get recognized mostly in like sex spaces, and people sort of like, well interrupts and I'm like, I'm in the middle.
Of something, felt like maybe now is the time.
But it is sort of cool to like have people come up to me and be like, listen, the podcast has been really great.
I really loved it. I learned a lot, you know, which is kind of like what we set out to do, right, It is like teach folks, but I also have fun.
I've seen a couple of negative reviews on the podcast on like different streaming things, but they're all like this is so sexual, and I'm like, oh, yeah, it's.
Kind of the point, babes. It's Sniffy's sniffy. I don't know what to tell you. This is what we do here, so sorry.
It's our bread and butter. Itlled exactly how you think. So what have you been up to? I was in La for a little bit. I had a cute little comedy gig out there. Yeah, since I haven't seen you.
What have you been up to? God?
I may may offer of a debut this year, which is really exciting to be acting again and doing that. I had a show on Fire Island this summer. I started a relationship.
Yes, we actually got the boyfriend revealed two days ago, so this is very new for me.
I'm like, really, it's a lot of information, all right.
So before we ask our guests to share, it's our turn to do a cruising confession. So I'm curious, Chris, have you ever had to hook up while you've been traveling home for the holidays?
Emphatically yes, yeah, yeah.
I do have some folks that, like I've been hooking up with since I left twenty years ago, that I still hook up with, which is really cool. And so like, whenever I'm in town, I'm like, all right, girls, where the things?
Where are we going? You've got like you've got the home all right? Yeah, yeah, little Remian, Yeah exactly. How about you? Oh Florida? Oh god. Yeah.
So when I do go back to Florida, it's pretty bleak. It's pretty bleak, and I do like to try to find what I can. It's tough in Florida, though, because I don't drive and people are really spread apart. So in Florida, I'm very much a like, in person, eye contact kind of girl. Suffice it to say, we both find ways to keep ourselves enticed and adventurous when we're back home, but we do know that we are not the only ones.
Right.
Queers all over the world can have a really hard time navigating the holidays because being home sucks for some of us. Of course, though we are a creative and tenacious community, and we can find plenty of ways to keep ourselves entertained. Now, maybe that means working your relatives into watching a movie musical featuring two bisexual witches and the guy that sucked Matt Bomber's foot.
Or maybe it means exploring your local parks and taking in nature with the help.
Of Sniffy's Oh, I do love doing that.
In this episode, we want to explore holiday hookups and how to navigate what can be both an erotic and perilous time, especially if you're traveling this time of year.
Today, we're going to be covering it all the good, the bad, the ugly, the long, the short, the thin, the thick, and the downright outrages.
I want to hear all the stories the same. Welcome to Sniffy's Cruising Confessions, the Holiday Special.
Welcome to Sniffy's Cruising Confessions.
I am Gabe Gonsals, I'm Chris Patterson Rosso. Each week we explore the sublime world of queer sex, cruising and relationship.
Will be talking to queer folks of all kinds, ask them questions, swap sex stories, share intimate revelations.
A lot of us are discovering ourselves in cruising spaces. This happened to me at this toilet stall, in the library or the airport.
I feel like everybody's gonna fuck a little harder here.
Damn, so I have.
It's like the neighborhood slot. And I took pride in that. I was so afraid but yet so intrigued. And Lamar I gave to Lamore he could take.
If you're having sex on Sniffy's, you already have a moral deficit.
Our first guest today went from being a Brooklyn drag diva to being one of the world's most beloved drag icons following her time on Rupau's Drag Race and Drag Race All Stars. I'm talking about the one, the Only Candy Muse.
Candy is eternally booked and busy, and she's traveling all over the world, touring and performing for sold out crowds, while still making time to eviscerate her fellow contestants on EA's House of Villains Season two every week this fall. Miss Muse will next be racing our screens on the Crave Canada series Slaycation throughout early next year.
We will be seated.
Please Welcome to Sniffy's Cruising Confessions. One of our favorite Brooklyn divas, Candy Muse.
Wow what an.
So I have to ask, are you a Sniffy's girl?
Oh?
Yeah, oh yeah? Can we find it? Can we find you?
Ahead less profile? Nonetheless?
Okay, Sniffe's is quick and easy and let's get it done now.
Yeah, and I'm a now kind of girl in the moment immediate Yeah.
Yeah, Well because like you know, on Sniffee's is very like we're not talking about oh hey, hey, how are you good? And you good? Look girl, we know what we're here for.
Yeah, so we can.
We can find you on the map. You're gonna be there somewhere. We'll never know who until we've been graced.
With Yeah, just somewhere in the East Williamsburg location.
Okay, do you ever send like a face pick?
I do?
Okay, I do only because I always find you treat people the way you want to be treated, correct, So I would never meet up with anyone that does not have a head or a face. Rather, so I would want the other person to feel safe, right yeah?
Yeah, and how do you verify it to you?
Well, there are times where I have to send a voice memo because I think that my voice is very just thing.
People are always like, oh, okay, yeah, that's you. That's kind of genius. Yeah you really couldn't fake. Yeah, boy, no one, I love that exactly. Oh that's great.
Most people would be like, I send an insta, I send a picture with the new paper on it, exactly.
I just talked, Yeah, no, it's very that And then girl, it's all gone home from there?
Work what else that mouth do?
Yes, we're gonna figure it all out, all right, Okatie before we get you too much trouble, before we give away the whole prize before folks have worked for it.
I am curious. This is our holiday episode.
So you're from the Bronx, but do you still go back home to visit family during the holidays?
Do you ever travel?
Yeah?
So I'm from the Bronx, but my mom actually moved down to Orlando, So I go down to Orlando for the holidays. Not very fun, but the boys are very cute, although no one can host because everyone knows their family. Oh yeah, oh so then what CarPlay?
Oh, car play, carp Place has so much cuter than like fucking in my backseat.
Car play is great. I love that euphemism. I don't know. I feel like you have to have a certain sized car for car play.
Well, I'm a picky eater. Got it a little car, a big car, small car, The job will get done.
Nonetheless, have you ever hosted while traveling? Is it something that you're daring enough to do?
I do.
I practically live in hotels and airplanes, so I have a friend believer that I'm going to a new city or country, it is best to taste the delicacy. I'm not gonna go to Italy. Not Italian men, right, I always I prefer to hosts then travel. I'm a lazy bitch.
Yeah, I get that.
Yeah, although not here in Brooklyn.
I prefer to travel because I don't really like people coming into my apartment. And actually I don't need anyone knowing where I live.
That's real security risk. That is a security risk. Yeah.
I always adjust my location on some face, so I'm like three blocks away from my.
Should favorite feature. I'm like, you don't need to know what intersection I'm Matt.
We do know that some people you know have a hard time going back to their families because they might be homophobic or transphobic, but you actually have a queer parent, so I'm curious, how does that shape your experiences during the holidays or do you feel a little more open talking about your relationships or what you do in your free time.
Oh my god, I come from a queer family in general.
My sister dated a transman.
And I have two moms, so being gay and I'm very open. The way I am with the public is the way I am back at home and my mom were like best friends, so I'm always like, girl, there was this guy who obviously she doesn't want to hear about the stories.
But she gets it. But there's no judgment.
And also I'm I'm an open book and I'm my mom my friend. Whoever it is, I'm going to talk to this story in details.
Do you cruise like outside? Okay?
Now here's the thing.
Cruising kind of scares me, okay, in a way of like I'm always so afraid of like what if it'll be the one day I go to the park to cruise and then someone of authority is gonna show up and playing cuffs and I'm just like terrified because I don't need TMZ talking about canes, right, you know, cruising sounds hot in a wall bathroom work and you're know, you're like.
Both sides right.
But like public play cruising terrified. Yeah, so I don't know about that one.
Yeah, I can see how that could be really difficult, like as a as a known person.
Well, and then that's also that like because everyone wants to tea.
Everyone wants to be the person who's like, guess who I saw at the fucking Rambles the other.
Well, that's what I was gonna say. There was one time I went to Rambles and my girl I gotta go. Yeah, because everyone's like Donor Killer.
Oh there's been times like listen, I know this is not the time, but I love you.
I was like, girl, now you jerking alone in the VIP.
Work.
Sorry, I had to. I had to.
I had to special guest of honor giving shows after five people coming to Bush. But yeah, it must be kind of confusing, right, Are you looking because you're a fan?
Are you looking because you're interested? Yeah?
Well, and that's the thing.
Prior to me getting on television, I would I love going to the you know the bars, you know those but the bars, the dark.
Balls, the parties and parties. But after being on TV.
It stopped going. You know, well, the Dark Ones in Europe is different, but Dark Ones in New York. I stopped going to those because I don't know. It's always an interesting thing being in a room where again, I don't know if you were I want to hook up or if you want to just come up to me and tell me how much you love me, which either.
Way, I'm I'm down for balls.
Can we do bro? I done both? Okay, yes, I love you? But can you suck my deck?
Are?
Oh my god?
I love that?
So we don't know that your nudes leaked during your first time on drag Race, and this has happened to a lot of Drag Race contestants. It happens to a lot of reality show contestants when fans and people don't know how to respect other people's privacy or consent like that. Shit's not okay, that sucks and you should not do that to people.
But I am curious, how did you deal with that?
How did you sort of reply, What was your system of support and kind of what would you say after experiencing that.
I think at the time mine and Rose's nuds got.
Leaked at the same time, and it was kind of like, Okay, I'm not shy about something news maybe face at all, you know, but it's one of those things of like, Okay, I don't think the public needed to see my nudes, which is fine because I'm Dominicans, so you know, there's nothing to hide. However, it's kind of like again, it's like an a vision of privacy where you're just like, Okay, the world hasn't even gotten to know who I am yet they've seen me completely naked, and now it's been a few years since then, and everyone knows my decies is so great. It makes things much easier now. I started, oh, it's private. I don't post much on there because you know, again now being a product figure like I don't never really want to.
You know. Sometimes I'm like I'm on Twitter and all the games and book in our short.
Hole and they really are and I'm like, wait, I kind of want to do that too, and then I remember who I am. But you know, when that happened, I kind of just like, Okay, I'm just gonna deal with it.
It is what it is.
I mean, I can't again, I'm not ashamed it. There's nothing to take back, and I believe in sexual liberation. If you want to show your body, then go ahead and do that. But again, it's about like consent and you just can't post someone's news because you feel.
Like it because like why it's weird.
It's like such a weird behavior.
And you're rooting for all of us, you know what I mean.
It's like we should feel free to like send each other stuff consentually without like people screenshotting that and putting it online. They're actually like states where that is illegal, so keep that in mind. But the law aside, I don't think it's like it's not us showing up for each other as a community, right, It's like I want to be out here and feel safe, and like the one person that does that like ruins it down the line for a.
Yeah, it's like how can I who can I trust? If I can't trust y'all?
Right?
Well that's why when people ask me for videos, I'm like, oh, absolutely, not mind.
The gallery is full of them.
Right, yeah, disappearing videos, No, No, I've seen.
I've been in situations where people's record with another phone.
With another phone, that's how you do it. I haven't even thought about it. You know what screen recording. It tells you the screen recording. Yeah, but you do it with another phone.
Yeah, and I can't.
Oh, these girls are nefarious. Nefarious. That's a great word for the holiday season. Has anyone ever asked you to show up in full geche?
Okay?
So I answer.
I was like, I was in Paris a few weeks ago and I was doing my gig and I was like a real fisher, real womanly and there was this guy who I think he was security there and he like kept like poking me like all night. I was like, okay, I'm usually not onant to hook up and drag. I am not for that. Maybe that's my job and that's that. But this night I was fro a real, real loose So we went to the bathroom stall we were like making out and whatever and other things. But then after the gig, I went to an afters and I got out of drag, of course. And then after the afters he had messaged me. He was like, Hey, I want to come over to your hotel and I was like, so, I'm not as a woman anymore. I have a full five o'clock shadow coming in And he was like, oh, I mean that's fun if you just put on the wig and and lipstick, and I was like, okay, yeah I did.
It's a quick drag.
Oh, I have a selfie works a selfie? Yeah I have to. Oh my god, I literally threw on a wig and some lashes.
Are you a lash? She had time for the glue she has?
Damn. He was fine. He was so fine, And I was like, you know what, it's worth it one second.
I do hope you invoiced him for a meet and greet though, because that takes a lot of time. People.
Oh my god, it's just enough screaming.
Honestly. Yeah, that photo just.
Took me back to like this and that ten years ago. Like that photo just took me back to sugar Lands.
Like, okay, good for you. You know what that's for you.
I love that for you.
You should use that as your professional headshot. Yeah, special appearance, my kadie mute? Is this five o'clock shadow?
A little lash? Yeah?
He lived and.
I lived to Actually.
I'm crying right now. I cannot. Oh my god, that was amazing. You did great work.
So I also had an hour to leave before my flight, so it was very like, all right, girl, we're doing this.
We're doing this now?
Oh wow, were you already packed? Oh yeah, okay, I'm a professional. A flight would never be missed by me. I love that.
But a man will also bess show.
We've got time for both, Yeah, for sure. I am curious. So we've talked about a guy that was like very into your drag, and you were very accommodating and kind about it given the way he asked. But I'm curious if you ever experienced the sort of inverse if people will meet you in person and then they're like, oh, but you're a drag queen and they assume things about you or assume they might not be attracted to.
Here's the thing.
Drag became cool over the last two years. Right now, everyone of the fucking drag queen. But drag wasn't that a few years ago, and it was very like, if you do drag, you're not masculine, and I'm sorry, like I'm not into feminine.
That was bullshit.
After Drag Race, do I find that.
I mean, most people are starfuckers and they would want to fuck you just because you have a name, right, just for the story.
They watched it on TV.
They see you as a boy and they're like, Okay, well this is just a person and this is just their art. But as the recent years, there hasn't been anyone that's like, you do drag.
No. But prior to.
To drag Race, yeah, it was very like, well, you know, also it doesn't help that I have acrylics on.
We know we're not doing yeah right right, yeah.
But yeah, prior to drag Race, absolutely there were there were trans guys who are just like not into it at all, But now everyone.
I think it also comes with people kind of understand it or becoming more comfortable embracing their femininity.
Like this whole like no fats.
No femmes, shit is like so tired, and we've like talked about that, and I do feel like, I mean hopefully there's like a cultural shift happening.
Yeah.
I'm also like, I, although I do drag, I think outside of drag, I could I'm just a regular chill, lead back person and I'm into like feminine guys, right. So I never understood when people are like, which I get it's a preference of you know, you want your your mask for mask work. I love you a master mask sometimes too, but I just I never understate the whole like, oh, you're so feminine, so like my.
Girl, we have we both have dicks. Yeah, yeah, and that's what we're here for.
Is it not right? Is it not? If not that, then what are we doing?
No?
For sure, I don't know.
And I think it is also like these conversations around gender and like how it's all just a fucking construct and like as we sort of like break down what that means, right, Like I think people are a little bit more open minded to be like you can actually be a multitude of things and you can still get dick down.
So absolutely, and also there's nothing masculine about sucking the.
Dick, so be clear. Yeah, let's be clear.
I wanted to talk to you a little bit about what it's like when you're on tour, right, some of the big cities, some of the small city is what is it like cruising?
Like what are the apps?
Like?
Okay, you can ask Mistress or Vangie and they would they would tell you, Mama, if we are in the city and we have a hotel, is going down. We were in Boston one year on Halloween tour and then one day and also I'm a very open and sexual president Mitch Alex is what it is.
I woke up with twenty guys.
You know which that day, I think, right before rehearsals, like eight guys. And again it's one of those things off like well, I'm in a new city and all the men here fine, and I am feeling hot and bothered and I'm lina something about it.
Yeah you got a hotel room. Yeah.
And you know, on the last tour we did, we were all over Europe countries I had never been to before, and I was like, well, Sweden. There was one time we were me and Zandie were flying into I think Switzerland, and I had open sniffies and then there was a guy that was oready there. That's fine, a ginger man. Oh bitch, we let have in the bathroom. That's everything I mean here, yeah, my mom, I'm gonna have the European man.
That's why tour is so fun.
When they're like, oh, we went on tour, I'm not like, oh, yues I get to make all this money.
I'm like, oh, bitch, oh man.
You can get to be the new girl in town in every oh yeah town. There is nothing more fun than're traveling to a new place and opening up an app and being like hey, and everyone's.
Like a new person.
It's like the sick of you. Yet they haven't been looking at you for weeks and talking to you. It's like you are the bell of the ball for forty eight hours.
See what I was in has like five gay people, oh and five fine, okay, and you.
Had them all.
Eighty times. So do the math. How's that multiplication table?
Oh gosh, I'm curious. As I mentioned you, you've always been a fallist drag queen. Are there any performances from your early days in Brooklyn where you look back and you're like, that was a little crunchy.
That was a little crunchy.
There was one time at tn T rest.
In Peace, God bless so many, so many queens got their stuff stolen from that basement.
Oh, by the security guard.
He was the security guard.
The security guard. I never knew that he was stealing the phones and tips.
Mama, I got a jacket stolen there one time. Yeah, uh huh damn.
There was one time at TNT I was being a greedy little bitch and this time you at dractually.
You either split tips.
Or you don't cry, which needs to be discussed beforehand, right, well, this night I was feeling feeling my fantasy.
I have a brand new pair of tights and a brandy look at the thrist shop. Was everything right. And Dahlia, my sister, she was like, hey, do you want to split tips? And I was like, no, girl, let's do our own tips tonight. So I went on to perform Jennifer Lopez do it well, yes, and everything that could go wrong went wrong and I made exactly four dollars in tips.
Dahlia made ninety dollars in tips.
See, and that's what you get be a greedy little bits.
That night she had to buy my food at Bigla Smith.
So love that.
I'm so sorry. No, good for me. No, it taught me a lesson.
It's a learning lesson.
Yeah, you can be a capitalist, you can be a communist, but at the end of the day, when someone needs to share with you, Okay, So Katie, I think we're gonna we're gonna talk a little bit about for sure.
I'm so curious. I want to know. Yeah.
Yeah.
So's Lacation is a brand new TV show created by Wilder Thunder and Crave Canada where they take six rugirls from different franchises and put us in the house.
This one, we're in a winter cabin, like an hour out of Toronto. I was hoping for a house in Mexico.
But I get it. It's the pilot season. Maybe season two we'll get And it's fun. It's lighthearted, it's fun. There's drama, there's hot boys, we get drunk, we get wild, we do challenges. It it's a really fun show. It's something different that comes out of the Drag Race universe. But people for a while now have been asking for stuff like a Big Brother version of Drag Race and stuff, right, so this is your way of kind of testing things out, seeing how it works.
And I'm excited.
First of all'm excited to just be working and having another show, Thank you very much. But it's it's really it's so fun. I cannot wait for everyone to see it. Is it like a competition show?
So is it? We do have.
Competition in the show, but it's not necessarily a competition show. And it's it's so different from Drag Race, and it's so different from Houssi Villains.
So it's gonna be really fun. No one gets booted off.
No, although a few girls should have Okay.
Whose clothing gets thrown into the ice.
Yeah, you brought all your like House of Villains experience. You're several seasons watching back Girls Club right right right?
Yeah, no, And it's fun because we also get into some deep topics. We also get into sexual health. A few of the cast mates, you know, they talk about their experience.
And no, it's it's really it's gonna be really good.
I'm really excited for it. And hopefully we get picked up for season two. Yeah, and hopefully for season two they keep me on the cast.
Yes, work, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I love that.
I love it. Yeah, let's get them in the Caribbean. Maybe you can get them to a house in dr right time? Yeah yeah? Wait are you all in drag the whole time?
So we're ass boys, But we do at the end, we do a huge performance for the town and it's we that's cute.
It's super cute.
Okay, great, so you don't have to practic too much.
No, although I shout.
Up before two cases because we were doing boy looks every single just like House.
The Villains and that house really and how Civilians.
I had a whole closet for herself and they didn't show but I also have another entire closet where I would get ready.
Tried to take your I didn't want to give up the bed to l Yeah. Oh my god, Larsa, That's what it was.
Which, by the way, I had no idea who she was when I got there. I mean, how could you do it?
Oh right, I got it?
Yeah, yeah, I was just like, okay, work gro.
Well, Kendy, thank you so much for joining us. We can't wait to see you onlaycation. As of filming, how Civilians haven't hasn't finished yet, so I'm very excited to finish the season and see how that turns out.
Very We're halfway through the season now, and let me tell you, Ship, if you thought the fights were bad, then okay, it's time for the boys to start fighting now.
I want the boys to be dramatic. I'm like, why are your friends? And this is weird to me for long? This is about to get very survivor.
No, no, no, ship great excited? Wait, oh my god, me neither and there might be one more. Kennedy's right in there.
Where I'm expecting several. I'm expecting, my girl.
You've been very tame so far, like you've been very very polite, like you've been reminding them who you are. Yeah, but you haven't really gone off yet, and so I'm waiting for the explosion and just say that's a.
Little betrayal happening soon.
Thank you, Oh, thank you, thank you. Let me need some villainy and husi villains. Really, I love that amazing. Well, thank you again, Candy. When we come back, we'll be chatting with Oscar Enya from New York's Poppy Juice night life and art collective, and we'll be talking to him about cruising, party planning and the very high stakes of creating inclusive community in these tumultuous times.
So don't go anywhere, we'll be right back.
Our next guest is New York DJ artists and party organizer Oscar Ye. He started a highly celebrated party and art collective, Poppy Juice. Poppy Juice is a gender inclusive New York circuit party that's been centering queer POC folks since twenty thirteen.
Oscar is here to teach us what he's learning during his eleven years being a community organizer and heading a liberatory art collective. We're also going to talk about how folks who aren't in New York City can create their own core spaces. So welcome to Sniffy's Cruising Confessions, Oscar, and are you doing, Oscar?
I'm like so happy to be here. Thank you for having me so, Oscar.
I'm curious for viewers who have never heard of Bobby Juice, how would you describe it?
Bobby Juice is an art collective and you know, it's consisted of three members, me and Mohammad and Adam Muhammad is the resident illustrator and art director, and then Adam and I are resident DJs and the co founders, and we've been working together for the last eleven years. Our mission is to celebrate the lives of queer entrance people of color, and we do so by creating these like legendary kind of like night parties and different activations. We always try to make it feel joyful and celebratory.
Have you ever found a fling or romance at one of your own events? Who's this guest?
Yeah?
A lot?
Yeah, Okay, I'm actually like a little shy, but you know, I'm a sexy little DJ.
Yeah.
Yeah, There's definitely been moments where I'm like, oh, this boy's cute. It's usually like I'll follow them on Instagram. After the night is like it would be really sexy, but I'm working.
I know I'm working. But the next night though, that's when, yes, or at the afters.
After the after yeah, yeah.
The after's invite is such a great like flirtation icebreaker. It's like, hey, you're conveying that you want to see more of this person. You're inviting them to an event later. That's a cube move. I like, yeah, it's very good. I moved here in twenty twelve, so Poppy Juice from twenty thirteen months old now has obviously grown so much. I mean, what do you think accounts for that? Do you think it's a need for more spaces like that or I.
Think it's like a couple of things.
We're part of a long lineage of QTPoC centered spaces in New York City.
There's been a history.
Of that where queer people, queer people of color come together and make their chosen families, meet their friends, meet their lovers. I guess like I kind of accounted to the need for the spaces, but also people love consistency. In New York, everything changes so quickly and so rapidly. The fact that we've been able to hang on to each other at least with like my co members. People see that and like enjoy seeing that. Also it's a good party, you know, like.
I know when the music's good and the crowd is cute, and that also helps.
Yeah, right, it's like you're definitely meeting a need.
And you know, I don't I don't think there were a lot of collectives doing stuff like that when I first moved here, at least not in my memory. And so it is cool to see not just Poppy Juice grow, but you know, I think of other parties like body Hack and bubble Tea, like there really is such a broad assortment of different parties that help elevate different parts of the qtpot community.
And I don't know, it's exciting to see exciting.
Did you find a lot of folks were giving you push back when you started to create the space.
I remember we were based out of this like tiny bar in Bedstide. Somebody had said was like aspar as like racist. Somebody felt like really alienated from the night. Other Wise, like from different venue owners, people would be like, oh, I don't know, your party sounds super niche, you don't really belong in night life. I don't think you could fill out a space. It came from all sorts of different directions. People forget the importance of nightlight spaces. People love showing up and supporting these types of initiatives because it is a really important space for us to socialize, to meet others, to have sex, to you know, do like be inspired, create art, you.
Know, flirt in multiple languages. I was like, I've never been to a party before where someone's hit on me in Spanish.
I was like, and I did it right back. It's great, Yeah, but it does right. It helps.
It's like it feels different, the vibe is different, and you know, I don't think it's in an exclusive way, but right it's like, hey, we're here to elevate this, but all are welcome. And I feel like that's always kind of how it has been. I have a lot of my like white not Latino friends will be like can I go. I'm like, yeah, like, just don't be rude, right and understand who is four?
But like, yeah, of course, Like we get that question all the time.
It's like, oh, like my boyfriend's white, or like my best friend is white can they come, And I'm like up to you and up to them to decide. Don't place the burden of that conversation on black and brown folks, like have it with yourselves. Usually most of the time they do end up coming, and they do end up having a blast, and it's usually someone that you know, they understand how to navigate the space and the importance of the space to others. So there's like this sec intentionality and consciousness around how you're experiencing the space.
I think that's like our driving force.
Actually, like we kind of realized like we were immediately dubbed like a safe space, and then we immediately kind of realize like, oh, like interestingly, as much as we try, we cannot guarantee the safety of seventy people in a room, you know, and that's how big the parties were at the time. Then we were like, what is another way that we want to make people understand what our intentions are, What are we trying to create, how we trying to make people feel, what are we trying to have them experience, you know, And so then we kind of switched our framing of what we were working on and what we were doing as intentional rather than safe.
I know there's a lot of talk right now if people needing to find ways to take care of each other. Do you think that nightlife and throwing events can be a form of care within community?
Definitely.
Historically nightlife spaces have been the sort of havens for current trans people of color, and I think.
It will keep being that.
We might have to be a little bit more careful in some ways and making sure that you know, we're gathering in spaces that feel supportive and that feel like can support us as well. But that reminds me of this, like time Out probably just said it was right after the Traven Martin verdict.
We were all so sad.
We almost were like, should we cancel like our communities like deep in mourning right now. We thought about it and we were like, we'll have the space. If people want to show up and can show up, it'll be there for them. And then it ended up being for me one of like the most memorable and sort of grounding moments in our history where people came and we're so thankful of the space and we're so excited to be there, and we're like, you know what, thank you for holding this Like I didn't think that I would have it in me to be around people, but it ended up being that I needed to be around people and to like talk about it and to think about this and also strategize about what's coming next, you know, feel a little bit of joy, feel a little relief, release, So all of these like little things are important. As much as the fight is important, I think to have those moments of whether it is rest, release, community, what love, sex, whatever it is, it's important to also have those moments. We can't just be on a fight and then on the offensive for the next four years.
Right.
What advice do you have for folks who are thinking about creating their own spaces.
Like Poppy Chews, you know, thinking about scale, It could be really important depending on where you're at. So maybe at first it won't be like a big warehouse party. Maybe it's just like a gathering at a friend's living room, you know, and it's like the circle of friends that you know, invite them, tell them to invite one friend and then have them gathering there and then see what happens, how it goes. And then also just like there's probably something that's out there, you know, for you, it could be interesting to go check it out, support it, maybe like talk to the people that go there, the people that organize it, and see how they started, because they'll be definitely more knowledgeable, more knowledgeable than I am in the context of where you're living, you.
Know, now, ask her.
A lot of our viewers may also be worried about heading home for the holidays to see their families. I'm curious if you have any ideas for folks to be able to stay safe and sane during the holiday season.
I love my mom so much, and so it is so important for me to spend time with her, and so I prioritize that I know, so that in the mornings I can get to spend time with her alone and we make breakfast together, and she like tells me all like the stories that she wants to tell me.
And that's like what.
I want for my time at home for the holidays is to have these memories with my mom. There's like other things that are annoying and that are hard, But as long as I get those moments, like, I know that I'll be good and then just like whatever helps you like remain patient.
Like lately, I've been doing a lot of meditation. That shit rocks so good.
I also, you know, love a little drink, and so maybe like when my mom goes to bed, I'll have like a little bit of wine or something with my brother or like my siblings. You know, we've all had difficult moments at this point in our lives, and there are ways that we know that work for each of us. Right, we just got to like remember them and tune into them totally.
Yeah.
I like that.
What a wholesome response.
After me, Chris and Candy spent all of today be like, so how do you look for Dick while you're hanging out with mom? Now you're like, actually, I love my mom spending nobody.
That's a really good point, right, Like also, yeah, look for ye that.
Yeah, after my mom has watched her Turkish Showupes on Netflix and we've had a glass of wine, then I.
Go out, Yeah exactly.
Yeah, And I'm curious where can folks find you and Poppy Juice online and learn about the next party coming up?
The best place to follow anything Poppy related is on our instagram, so it's just Poppy Juice BK. And then my personal instagram is Oscar and.
All right, after the break Gabe's gonna be stepping out into the town to hear some hot and horrific holiday hookup story.
Oh I can't wait, ye, I can't wait to share it.
Welcome back to Sniffy's Cruising Confessions. Thanks for sticking around with us.
Now.
If you thought New York days were a mess during Pride, buckle the fuck up, because it is truly nothing compared to the night before Thanksgiving. All over the city I call home, horny homos have been flooding night spots looking for some fun.
So on November twenty seventh, the night before k pettit to our favorite Brooklyn hotspot, Animal, which is a place that we're all deeply thankful for this season, deeply deeply.
Let's take a look.
It is Thanksgiving Eve and we are camped out at Animal, a bar in Brooklyn, New York, where we're gonna be asking guests about their holiday hookup stories and how they navigate cruising while they're home for the holidays. Let's see these sluts are up to. I'm curious. As a bartender, I feel like you might have unique insight. What do you think makes the night before Thanksgiving particularly chaotic?
Everybody being home everyone anticipating eating good tomorrow one blue sennup before seeing their family the next day. If they're doing that or just straight up partying because they're not going home and they're just with their friends.
That's me.
I think that if people are like planning on going home and seeing family, there's probably a lot of stress that surrounds that subject. I think it's especially difficult to facer family, so people are probably trying to let loose a little bit.
Everyone's not doing anything for two days, like they have an extra you know, weekend whatever, and you know, gays in a weekend like and go. I also think that like some people have some demons and like that's fine, and then they kind of let it out and everyone kind of latches onto the energy and it's it's cute.
You know night when we can all be demon twinks. I'm so excited.
I find that Thanksgiving, even New York, it is never as chaotic as you would expect it to be.
Coming from the suburbs.
Like that's what the girls where they fucking pop off blackout Wednesday as everyone returning to their hometowns, anyone left over in New York, like they're gonna come out.
What has been your go to excuse for dipping out of family events to go hook up with someone else?
You know, you always have to run to get ice cream, like a mcflurry and some mcdag.
You know, Oh, I'm going to visit my old friends and going over to Alicia's house.
I'm going out to Tim Morton's and like stealing her car to like suck someone off in the back seats.
A friend of mine is like having a hard time with the holidays, kind of barrow the car.
Almost everyone we've interviewed tonight has said they use a friend as an excuse. But you're the first person to give me the emotional appeal, right You're like, not only do I have a friend I'm hanging out with, they're going through a hard time, so I've got to be there.
Yeah, what is my dad gonna say? I'm like, hey, like Carrie's really going through right now. Like I'm just gonna go Meeter at the restaurant reallyquick.
No, have you ever hooked up like in your family home? Is that something a ligne you would cross?
Yeah?
What do you mean a line I would cross? That's my home.
If I'm not crossing a line that's my home.
I woke up one morning guy messed mess and FIE's was like, my son's at school, you should come over, and I'm sort of like cool. Yeah. Uh So I ended up like going to his house, like there's like toys all over the place. He's like, my wife divorced me like three months ago, and I just want to get railed right now.
Snuck out, met him in a Walmart parking lot and I slammed him right there.
I mean I'll slam as something else. I mean, yeah, yeah, yeah, but yeah, yeah, yeah, I get it exactly. It's not a drug reference. It was a fucking reference. We're talking about penetration here, Okay. Which level of cousin is the most okay to hook up with? For second or third? Cousin? Second ones removed or third?
I from Texas, So cousin fucking is on the table, not that I've thought about it, but maybe second.
Okay.
I have a huge family, so I'm gonna say to third. Okay, Yeah, see me too.
As far removed as moss. Yeah, that's weird.
Before you go, what is one last piece of advice or message you would like to give to people watching during the holidays.
Put yourself verse, try not to hold on to everything.
Just remember the time keeps moving, and as long as you stay present in the moment and you let everything rush over you, you won't be so overwhelmed.
Find your inner demon, twink and let loose I.
Mean, embrace it all.
I mean, for a long time I thought that I was weird and didn't fit in this community. But it turns out everyone has place, so own that space and like live your life.
I think gratitude goes a long way, and we could all go to show each other and especially like in among queer spaces, we can go to be a little more grateful towards each other. We all kind of need to hear it.
Josh, that's really great advice. I thought you were gonna say, be grateful and spread your whole.
Okay, that was wild. What did you think today?
Do?
All?
Right?
Did you did?
Fantastic?
My largest takeaway I think from that segment is the amount of people that would sleep with their family.
So we were really gagged about our guests. Today we're so happy we want to thank them again. The legend Candy Muse and Poppy Juice's oscar Anya for being on the pot today as well as a team over at Animal in Brooklyn. They treated us so so nicely, they always do. I do love that space. It's so crowded and so worth it, and the.
Music is always phenomenal and as always we have been your host. I am gabeln.
Salez and you can follow me on socials using the handle gay Bones gy bna Z and.
I am Chris Patterson Rosso. You can follow me at CPR Gives You Life.
Thanks again for tuning in too, Snoffy's Cruising Confessions, See you soon. Sniffy's Cruising Confessions is co directed by Adam Barron and Brontest Pernel, produced by Cameron Femino, and executive produced by Eli Martin.
Cruising Confessions is ended by Snippies, the ultimate map based cruising platform were gay by intruitive people ready to cruise. Check out the map at snippies dot com and follow Snippies on socials at snippis app