Scrubbing In with Becca Tilly and Tanya rad and I Heart Radio and two time People's Choice Award winning podcast. Hello everybody, We're scrubbing in. Happy Monday, Happy Monday. I've got some I've got some energy today, some energy. Yeah. Why why why do you have? Then? Is it different than normal energy or is it you're just a little different? Yeah, yeah, I do have to say because I feel like I've been um, I've been like just kind of going out of town a little bit more. I haven't gone on a plane yet, but I've been trying to venture out a little bit more lately. And this weekend I went to um this place. I went with a couple of girlfriends to this hotel over the weekend, and I just realized that, like I miss community and connecting with people. Yeah, I feel like during quarantine and we've all like we're all a little like socially awkward, nobody wants to talk. And like we were out at this pool and obviously socially distance and we're outside of a pool and like nobody was there and this really like cute girl and this her like UM friend get in with us and they start talking. It was so funny. Because my girlfriends that I was with, she like kind of panic because we didn't have our masks. So she turned around, you know, like she like turned around, and it was like, I don't know what to do. But they were so far away. I was like, it's fine, we're you know, we're good. And so we started talking to them and they were just so fun. The girl is a dula and so you know, me and I like, I just love all this stuff. I've never even heard. I didn't know what a dula was. So she's explaining to me like how a baby is born and how it like torpedoes out of you and the benefits of standing up while you're giving birth. And I was just like, oh my gosh, I'm gonna stand and I give birth. And then and then I decided that I'm not going to get an epidural while I'm okay, but I like fully we got her number her Instagram, and I was like, I want you to be my dula when the time comes. Like she was just so cute and her friend that was there. We just all were just like talking about our lives and it just felt so Her name was Becca. That was the way that you do and I was like, oh my gosh, like my best friend is named Becca, Like this is so fun. It was just just I don't know, it just gave me this like I don't know how to explain this energy, you know, like I just miss connecting with people and they all are from l a m. Her fiance is just like so cool as a businessman from here, and we're all gonna like reconnect again and like have you know, socially distanced drinks at some point because we just got so invest in each other's lives. It was just like playing in your future birth, like that's a good thing, that's all sorted out, and now I crossed that one off the list. Never knew I never. I didn't know anything about childbirth truly, honestly, And I feel like and we bonded over pelvic floor and like menstrual cups and just a soul mate. We spent so much time with these people outside and it was just so fun. I think, I think, why no epidural? Well so because the baby. So I don't want to speak on it too much because I'm obviously not um an O R, you know, trained professional, but um she was saying that the baby torpedoes out of you. And there's a lot of benefit to like moving your hips a certain way or something, and when you get the epidural, like you can't you can't move it. And so there's just like there's benefits to not having it. Um, there's also benefits to having it, but to me, in my opinion, that the benefits of not having it seemed better. Quick story, my wife was given an epidural and by a trainee and it didn't take, and so she was feeling everything and they had to come in and do it again, which it's an unpleasant experience. And when we see how the older guy teaching the younger guy were to stick it into my wife's spine, I was pretty uncomfortable with that. And then it didn't take as we had feared, and then it happened again, and then it started to take, and then it was time and then took her to the delivery room and then it wasn't connected anymore anyway, and so she felt everything. So, um, I'm a proponent of epidurals because the second time went fine and it was a much easier experience. Oh really, yeah, But well, I think everyone's I mean, and I think everyone is different everyone has their own plan of how they wanted to go, and sometimes it doesn't go the way that you plan. And I think the whole thing with pregnancy. And obviously I'm also not a professional or someone who has experiences, but from what I follow a lot of moms on Instagram, and I've learned that, like, you can't plan how it's going to go, but you have an idea of how you wanted to go, but if it doesn't, you have to be prepared to embrace the Yeah, and that's what this this this Duela that that's kind of what she does. She kind of just like helps you plan with you and who knows. I mean I've honestly never given it any thoughts, So who knows when the time comes, like what I'm gonna want. But I've never really talked to somebody that's super knowledgeable in that space before. And you know, those people just have cool Like she just had cool energy, and I was just like, I want to be your friend. I need to be your friend. So I have a new friend. I'm just so funny. I mean, just like a lot of people don't talk about their birthplan before they're like pregnant, you know, I like in your mind, you're like, well, you know, that's the first time I've had the opportunity to talk to someone and get that knowledge as if you're on the custom of don't. Well, no, we've definitely got there because we were just talking because so her fiance was also divorced with um a child, and so we bonded on that because so and I told her I was like I'm not having it, you know, like I went their breakup or whatever. So we definitely got there. But um, yeah, it was so funny because it's just like total stranger and we got into just like everything under the sun, and like it was one of those things where I just missed. I just realized how much I I love meeting I love meeting new people, I love connecting with people. And like something about that weekend it was just like, um, I saw this couple that you know, um, I had run into before. They're like this old couple that I'd run into this same at the same hotel. Just everything felt very kismet and hopeful and just butterflies, just butterflies. Yeah. So I have like a good energy right now today. That's good. Can you seem refreshed? As if the weekend was a good, uh breath of fresh air. It was is it weird that she's found the new Becca? Is it weird for me bother you at all? No, you're gonna You're gonna love her. I feel like if you found a new Tanya that you thought was so cool and so awesome, it would bother Tanya. Oh, it would be like a full blown situation argument. And yeah, well as she as cool as me, Like no, no, no, I no, I was saying, that's yeah, no, I'm I'm like. The last time I felt like jealous over a friendship I think was in I think I was in fifth grade, my friend Sydney and Leslie and then they if they hung out about me. I felt like we betrayal. But yeah, it's the last time, So I'm happy for you. I'm I'm honored that her name's Becka. And she was so cool and effortless or whatever he says, cool, just cool. You know those girls that are just cool. I was like, you are. And then her friend they were, um, this gay couple who we actually have some friends in common, and they were just as awesome too and just like so in love and everything. I don't know. It was just everything about it was just awesome. I love that so happy. So did you watch the Super Bowl? Uh? Yeah, I mean I I mean I didn't really watch the plays and stuff. Yeah, the play, yeah, but the halftime show you watch? I watched it. It was but like, I don't say I didn't. I don't know who it was, this new Fest so I heard what do you think about the Weekend? Though, hmm, I liked it. The setup was cool, Like I thought the set up the production of it was really cool. And I thought how they utilized like the spaces, like the stands and stuff was cool. But I don't know. When I think about my favorite halftime performances, it's been like multiple people that come out, and I guess it's different with COVID, but like, do you remember the Steven Tyler Britney Spears one where she came out. Yeah, that was like epic, and I think all of even j Lo and Shakira last year. It was just cool because there was like two people feeding off their energy and then he was just kind of by himself, so like for what he had, I thought he was great in the sense of he was like entertaining for however long by himself, but I don't know, I was kind of indifferent. I guess. You know, it's funny. I think that was like the big debate of like it was kind of womp womp, a little like lackluster. Yeah, but you know what, you know what, Oh, okay, scraping. Oh she's adjusting in her seat. I get it. The super Bowl performances are like big and lavish and like fun and energy, and I get that. But if you're going to hire the Weekend, I don't really know how it works, but if you're gonna hire the Weekend to perform at your super Bowl halftime show, the Weekend has a brand, and his brand is exactly what he brought, you know what I mean, Like, that's exactly what he brought. And I respect the hell out of a man that goes down with his brand like that. Well, I mean it's like it's some I mean that what he has a great he's a great singer. The production was cool, but like, what else was he supposed to do? That's what I'm saying. But like people were saying, he could have brought other people, he could have done a cover and like done some aerobics or things like that. But It's like, that's not the that's not the weekend, and if you're going to hire the weekend, you're going to get the weekend. And I respect it. I was just upset that they didn't do like the TikTok dance to the blinding light. A number of people make that same complaint. Well, I'm just like, so, I don't know if there's legal reasons or something, but I'm thinking, you have all these dancers masked on the Super Bowl field and you're not just going to throw in a little routine for us. No, y'all know you know what I'm saying. You know what I was googling was did the Weekend get new teeth? See, that's not good if you're googling that. During the performance, it wasn't very compelling. It was compelling. I was just very curious. They looked a lot different. No, but I'm with you. He did. He did what he does. My test is I washed it with my daughters and halfway through my youngest was doing handstands and my oldest was staring at her phone. So that's my test. I think it was a snooze. Oh yeah, but I would hate to all I would also hate to be someone performing at the Super Bowl and have to hear the critics. So it's a thankless gig. It's like hosting the Oscars. You can't win exactly. I was gonna say, like, no matter who it is, there's always a group of people that are like, no, I feel like Shaqui and Jaylo got a pretty kidding The whole conservative like nation was like talking about how scandalous the dance dagas. I feel like Gaga's was pretty wildly wildly not wildly widely widely thank you widely raved? Who did she bring anyone else? All? But she's dance, I mean she's I mean she jumped off the Yeah, she's like sky skydived. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like from the straight beginning, it was entertainment, I know, but that's not what the weekend is. What I learned about the weekend with the memes. The memes afterwards were hysterical. Credit for that. Someone said when I'm trying to what, I'm trying to find a bathroom poop or something, and it's like him like frantically roaming the hallways and then like the close ups where it's like all distorted, and they were like it was like in quotes like hey the bers here, they're funny. I do. I will say when dog got did it? When she did jump off? Remember people were it was like the same thing like memes. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it was funny. So there you go. I have a question. Okay, so Tanya, you have decided you're not going to call the guy in the car. Last week's episode was called Sideswipe Right, very clever title at Eastern came up with, I thought, very funny, and the big debate was whether to call him or not. You've decided not to call him for now? For now? What does that mean? I don't want to call him? I just don't want. I think that I'm kind of leaning into this space of wanting to be somebody be intentional and thoughtful and pursue me. So I'm kind of wanting to take my hands off of the wheel right now. Well, we did pursue you. Yeah, that's that's I didn't mean to go down this road. But I agree with Becca, that is pursuit. Yeah, but it feels to me like I'm forcing it, whereas I'm just everything else that's going on just feels more natural. So I'm just kind of leaning into that. So next time if he do, he has to like run over you and then will film a little more day if he gets a toe next time and I have you know, yeah, I love that story because it escalated to like, oh my god, he didn't almost he didn't really almost him me. I just was like jumpy to like when he almost killed me, Like it was like escalated quickly. You know what's funny is the difference because I told the story on the Morning show. The difference in the response from scrubbing in listeners versus Morning show was drastic. It was scrubbing and listeners were this is fate. Think of the stories for your kids. It's so beautiful. Blah blah blah. The Morning show listeners were all like, this man's a stalker. He knows your run route dateline, like don't go there, stranger danger. And I was like, and it's very obvious because of the time, you know what I mean, Like the but we're reaching out was just different, completely different days, and it was just so funny to me. That is funny. Well, our scrubbers, like especially the ones who identify as Tanya is of course they saw like the romantic comedy aspect of it. Cute. It's interesting. You're not closing the door on him, though. No, I'm not closing the door on anything. I don't close doors anything. You said for now, so you might call him in a month. That's kind of weird, isn't it. It's already been over a week. Yeah, but guess what marked you know what Tanya is trying to do, um live an intentional life in the present, in the present for today. We're not calling him, got it? So that's why what I suggested we call him since you don't want to. I still got the look of death again, because you're keeping an option open. Yeah, all right. What if we called and we said, hey, we found this piece of paper on the ground with this number on it. What's your Instagram? Messing with my fate? Oh? Okay, okay, thank you very much. Okay, well you're not you're This is my thought, and I have one question and one question only, and you can answer it however you want. If he was immediately attractive to you but you didn't have to think about it, you turned and you're like, oh my, wow, would you call him? I don't know, right, it's dev Patel. Yeah, he had a little Dev Patel. It was like Dev Patel meets Adam Brodie meets Nasarie from Magic like it was. It was I'm not gonna lie, it was my type for sure. Yes, scrubber, she really did just reference the lead singer with a bad Magic. He's this is the most publicity he's gotten in a long time from the song rude from six years ago. He's actually a very well known songwriter in the industry. I'm sure he is. Well. I love that song, so like, no hate towards any of that. But but what I'm what I'm trying to get at is he was very much He was my type. I just was Tanya No, Mr Wilsher compared to what you have dated in a car situation? Could you see how I could have been? No, Okay, no, I felt like a reach. I like the idea of calling him and saying that you found it on the ground, because then it turns into like a Cinderella thing, because then you you judge his reaction. If he's like, hey, I found this snowe on the ground. I thought I'd give it a call. If he's like, hey, you want to meet up and like this man is just down. But if he says, this is my man and my number, and I had given it to any of you freaks, and that something is if he says, no, this is for a beautiful blond girl. Man, yeah he saw this is for the girl I almost ran over. You say like, yeah, oh that's so weird. I gave that to only one woman ever, Or if he said like, oh yeah, I give those out sometimes. Yeah, we were you venturer, And that's what another on air on air listener said that this seems like a move and he just hasn't like in his car and he just like does this That chicken scratch how it was written down was on the spot. I feel. I hope if he planned him out, he should do printer paper like printer letters or whatever, because that chicken scratch written all over it and not gonna lie. Have you found anything out in your research on him? Just where he just where he resides and yeah, city and potential job. That's pretty that's a lot from we know who he is. Yeah, we'll have to get down to this. Okay, So you had if you got a first name in a phone number and you use the internet to get his city and possibly his employer. Correct, pretty good pretty good. It's pretty good. I'm not gonna lie. I can't take the credit. It's not my sleuthing. I'm I'm a terrible sleuth, but I have people in my life that are sleuth, the Spurts. Sleuth the Spurts, but we have a title. Um, did his city and job make you less or more interested in him? More? She just said, she said, y'all missed it because she said a while east I was talking about she said, this is my man and my number on a piece of paper. She's claimed him. Can we get a clue of to like, what field, what general world of employment he's in? He's a businessman? Is a broad it's broad? Okay? I said general? That's general? Okay? Yeah, yeah, well no, it was interesting. So it was a coinci and said he happened to be over here? Yeah, or I don't know, you know? And yeah, because like, yeah, what's the area code by Coe. We're gonna narrow it down, bye area code. Can talk to my dula about it, okay, talked to her dula? Cool Becca, Um, talk to my dula about it. I'm going to bed a bumper sticker talk to about it. Wait, speaking of businessman, we have a businessman coming on the podcast. That's our guest today, and he is a real estate expert. He's written a book. He's just like got a lot going on. You may know him. He's on a million Dollar Listening New York, which is very popular show on Bravo. Yes, which is very popular show on Bravo. His name is Ryan Sirhan and I'm very excited. I because in the process of buying a house, I have a many many questions for him. So um, he will be coming on next And before we go on a break, I want to talk about our Galantine's Night in because we're doing a virtual night with our girls and love it or hate it, Tanya and I have your heart and you don't need a significant other for this party. This is a different type of party, not Galantine's Day. So it's Wednesday, which is like not today and tomorrow, but the next day, Um, February ten, and it's gonna be at five pm Pacific, which is eight o'clock Eastern. You can get your tickets at on location live dot com slash scrubbing in A portion of the proceeds will go UM from the live event. We'll go to save our stages and we have a really special treat you guys because we have a reunion of sorts and this is gonna be a reunion that I don't even know should we. So we have Sabrina Carpenter coming on, which she has been very relevant in the headlines lately. Yes, she's not only super relevant. But if you will recall our episode from Palm Springs, Rebecca passed out in the middle of an interview. Never before happened on scrubbing in in the time of this podcast. Um, we were doing interview with Serrenda Carpenter. Rebecca had too many spicy margaritis and passed out during the interview and just disappeared. And we never and so I kept going with Sabrina. We never mentioned it any I need to know what her team told her, like if she even knows what happened or if she has no clue. It was so embarrassing looking back, Um, but she was just a professional. She she got through it. If she saw me in distress, she never missed a beat in her interview with Tanya. It's like a little relid. Becca just falls out of frame in the middle of the interview and Serena doesn't scoop a beat, She just keeps on talking. It was so I didn't just fall. It was strategically leaning to throw up into an ice. But I want to show her the video for sure. We have to and then ask her like if she knew anything was going on or she just was like doing her thing. Well, I just imagine because I was during the time where she was to impress, so she was probably doing like back to back. She was just like, Okay, she's still there. But in the video, your eyes are cutting to Easton like looking at everyone panics. Both of y'all were absolute professionals though, so I'm very excited to talk to her for the first time since. So get your tickets. Um, you won't want to miss that. Yeah, so on location live dot com slash scrubbing in for your tickets. It's gonna be so fun, so fun. Um, Okay, we're gonna take a break. We'll be right back with Ryan sir hand. All right, you guys, we have someone um in the o R today that is honestly someone I specifically really need in my life right now. So this couldn't come in a better time. We have Ryan sir Hand in the O r scrubbing in you're our your our official first guest. Yeah, well not technically because you weren't here that week with Matthew Hassey on Oh okay, well with both of us together. Since I've been back, you're you're my first guest. That's awesome. Tania really reigned on the prede there. You know, I checked the facts on the fact checker over here. Where have you? Where have you been? He said? Since you been back? I just went. I went to Louisiana for Christmas. So when I came back, I got it. Yeah. So we had to adjust a few things, a few things. But um, I for those who don't know who you are, you're basically just a mogul in so many, um different areas. Where do you begin? Like when you introduce yourself and someone says, what do you do? Where do you start? Well? I start with real estate. Um, I'm a real estate broker and I run a real estate firm in New York. But most people know me from Millionaire Listing New York on Bravo or sell likes her ants. Uh. And then we can get deeper there if they've read the books or watch logs or social and you know, yeah, I like your book set up behind you. Behind you. There is that the big big money energy. How to rule at work, dominate at life and make millions on Amazon? Yes, yes, yeah you can. You can get it on Amazon now, how to make millions on Amazon? Yeah yeah, um, yes, it is stacked up behind me really good. Yeah. Because my first book that came out, I was I spent two weeks like traveling the country, you know, sales team, salesforces, book signings, Bravo stuff right everywhere. It was crazy. This time, I'm like stuck in this chair, which is I mean, it's fine. I don't know, it's it's it's good in some ways. It's but it's not as exciting in every other way. But it's kind of cool that I get to meet so many different people that otherwise would not be able to travel to. Yeah. I I've had that same thought of like when we've gotten to interview people, it's been cool because some of the people we wouldn't actually be able to have the chance to talk to just because schedules and being able to come into the studio. And so it's been nice having guests that, um, like a broader range of guests. I guess because everyone's at home or you know, they should be at home. Um. So I'm currently in the process of looking to buy a home for the first time in l A. Are you Yeah? And it is the most um, humbling, competitive, intimidating thing that I've done in my life. To be honest, Um, I've put in an offer on two homes and it's been like, there's been over twenty offers on each of them, and it just kind of feels where where are you trying to buy? I'm in Los Angeles, so in the Los Angeles area. It's crazy. Really, there's over twenty offers. That's wild. Uh. You know, I thought that that type of market was really only in low tax states. Um, but it is. Uh yeah, listen, it's COVID. Right, was a flight to land, a flight to homes. Nothing better than being stuck in your current house to realize how terrible it is if you want to go get a better one. That's that's all. That's what Quarantine did. It was a multi trillion dollar pr campaign for the value of a of a new house, right of a better house, especially like because it's oftentimes out of sight, out of mind. Right if you're working if you're running around all the time, you're like, I should move, but al right, it's such a pain in the ass you just don't do it. And then when you can't do anything and you're like, I should probably move, and then Zillo is so easy. I don't know if you saw that Saturday at Live skipped this weekend where like, uh, it's like Zilo porn. You should check it out. It's funny. I did see. I saw a lot of people talking about it, but I haven't seen it. Yeah, because everyone's at home, like late at night, you know, they're like scrolling through and then they quickly go over to Zillo and they start checking out houses that they can't afford hern on for people. Um, but yeah, that's it's an exciting process. It's awesome. You have are paying a mortgage or you're paying someone else's mortgage up to you. If you have to down payment, that's a decision you really have to make. Like you have a down payment, Are you going to pay your on mortgage and build equity and build a future or do you want to pay someone else's don't do I know? And that's what but it is, it's I I guess my question is how do you in this type of market when it's like this, and you know, a lot of people are saying in the next few months, more homes are gonna go on sale and there's going to be more options apparently, But then it's and then you go, like what if the interest rate raises? And there's all these questions of do I need to just do my best to do it now or do I wait so that I'm not over paying for something that? Yeah, you know, you you can never time the market. It's impossible. People have tried. Can't do it. Um. But if you feel the market is too frothy and tot then you shouldn't buy it off more than you can chew right, be careful about overpaying, um. But oftentimes you're not just overpaying. Right, there's a market for it. There's there's people who want to buy the houses for a reason. Don't be worried about interest rate's. Interest rates are going to be where they are, uh plus minus a few points like for the next couple of years. So yeah, so do not be worried about that. Just try to find an house that you love. I mean, that's that's that's the toughest thing to do. And if you can get a house that you like but you don't love it, you know that you can learn to love it. You can make it your wrong, you can learn to love it. The key to life right there. Yeah, like listen, I know you. You know, yes, I could go into there's you. You get what I'm talking about. So yeah, yeah, you could learn to love them. Uh. But buying a home is terrifying, totally scary, and insane amount of commitment. But it's also it's fun and it's that kind of important next step, right most people will like My life sort of changed mentally when I bought my first place because and it was like, damn, now I'm an adult. There's a lot of things that that make you feel like you're an adult, but nothing more than getting a mortgage. It feels very significant in my adulthood, this this step. And I'm you know, I'm in my head, I'm I'm looking at other markets in different cities, wondering if I should you know, move out of l A or where the value is. And I get overwhelmed because I start looking at what's available in other areas for you know, my budget, and it's a little discouraging seeing what what we pay for in the Los Angeles area versus elsewhere except for New York. Of course. I was about to say, like, I'm in a townhouse right now that's probably worth ten million dollars that has no bedrooms. Um uh. And the views are of brick. So right, it's all relative, right, But there is uh intellectual curiosity and excitement and energy and buzz and even now post COVID incredible networking opportunities in l A and New York that you just can't do by zoom anywhere else in the world, right, um uh so, and so you pay for it, right, Yeah, No, you're right. I mean I have these moments, and I've talked to Tony about it. Where I go. You know, I could get this if I moved to Nashville, or I could get this if I moved to Texas. And then I go somewhere, I go to the beach, here, go do something. I know. I know you is great, and you'd be like, yeah, all my friends are, all my friends are in l A. Like cool, I'll let me go like walk my dog for twenty four hours, I know. But then I have a beautiful home to sit in my misery in yeah, I don't know about that location. Location location, That's why they say that, right, you live in the neighborhood. That's that's honestly what's stopping me. I I was started starting the process of buying a home last year right before COVID hit, and then I was starting to like look around because this is I know, I wanted to live around here because I'm close to the studio, this is like where all my work is. And then and now I'm working from home, and I just was like, maybe I just table it for a minute because I don't know if necessarily this is where I want to buy my home, you know, So I just completely stopped the process because I just was like overwhelmed. Yeah, which is totally fine. I mean we when quarantine happened last year, every buyer dropped out in New York. Everyone waited because people just didn't know, why am I spending this amount of money to be an apartment if I don't have to go back to work for two years? Is that why you started? Is that when you started writing this new book? Because I feel like it's all about kind of shift, because all of our routines got shifted, and so it's kind of like starting to make new goals and how to figure out that is that when you started writing this book. Yeah, actually, um, I was speaking to so many people because we do a large online uh sales. We have a large online sales platform. We have a course that's got over We've been doing it for about a year. We have six one hundred agents and a hundred and ten countries, and they and everyone was going through the same thing. Right at first started in Italy and then it wrapped through Europe and then slowly it hit us. And I was talking to so many people that were having a hard time, who who are connecting their self worth to their income right and social media has a big role in that, Okay, Um, but people get so self conscious and so down on themselves if they're they think they're they're not making enough money and they're supposed to be doing this and they're supposed to be living this way. Um. When you cannot connect success to money, right, money is is energy. Right. Success is a state of mind. Um. And if you can and if you can project yourself to be the future you that you want to be, you can start being that person tomorrow. You do not have to wait um And as I was just talking to more and more people about that and the ways to do that, and how to start taking a note of kind of who you are today, what the perception people have of you is today, and how you can start leading a more confident, fulfilling life so that when you take control of the energy that you put out into the world, you can really change your life. The book just sort of came out that way and wrote it in like two months. That's wild. That's actually, that's one of the things that my mentor taught me from the very beginning. I met him when I was eighteen, and he always told me, he said, chase, chase your passion, not the paycheck. He's like, trust me, the paycheck will come if you are chasing your passion. And he was right, crazy, yeah, And you just have to put the work into the passion. Right. What we say around here is pretty similar. But it's like, you know, because there's so much that we can't control in life. There's so much that you know you can't. You think you're gonna book this and then you don't. God, and so much is up and so much is down. But if you just if you have a routine and you stick to it right, and you take care of the work every single day, the work will take care of you. So just take care of the work. The work will take care of you, and it removes a lot of the pressure that you put on yourselves. You go out and make something happen every day. And I got to do this and I got these goals. It's great to have goals. It's great to have visions. I think they're really really important. Um But at the same time, you just know that by default, like we live in a time where if you put the work in, the work will take care of you and you will make money. Um Uh, you know, if if you want it right. That's the hardest thing to teach us want do you do you think it's this year and the like? After what we've been through with the pandemic and people losing their jobs and people kind of spending so much time with themselves in their own homes. Like do you think starting up a business during this time? Is is financially smart? Or should people wait? Like? What would you advise that if someone is looking to start up their own business. The greatest businesses and inventions have come when people's backs were up against a wall. It's what produces the most creativity, the most ingenuity. Um. And if you just look like Isaac Newton discovered gravity during a pandemic because he was quarantined in his house. That's the whole reason he was sitting under that tree, right, Like the guitars. Electric guitar was created in a recession. Basketball was created during a quarantine. Like it's you know, um uh? And so I think. So I started my own real estate company. I've been a broker at another firm for twelve years and I left on July one and my own company and built it over the summer and announced it in November, sorry, in September, because I knew. As scary as this is, and as many people are leaving New York as they are, uh, everything is going to get better. The future is always brighter than the past, right, and no one else is going to do it, so might as well be me. Right, it's at the bar, and I said, love, you know, if you start a new business when everyone else is starting businesses and everyone's like, okay, cool man, good job, nice. But if you start a new business when everyone else is fleeing, scared, terrified, stuck inside, everyone was like, whoa, are you okay? That's awesome? Really wow? Like you sure, totally different reactions. Um, it's been great, you know, it's been great. So I think anyone with that entrepreneurial bug or or spirit probably I think gets gets gets a lot of adrenaline from times like these. It's uh, there's no better time than now. And like you, just like you just said, like why not me? When you when you first started in this industry? Did you? I mean, did you have instant success? Was there that you know? You didn't you weren't someone who was like an overnight sensation. No, no, no no, no, I uh it was slowly, but surely. Um. I mean I am incredibly persistent. I will follow up with you until you die, and then I'll come to your funeral and I'll sell your estate and I'll follow up with your kids, right like I am in this business until I die. Um, but I'm very persistent. Um, And I just knew that I don't know, like I listen, I grew up very nicely, like a good upbringing, great parents. You know, they were uh really not too excited that I decided to go to New York City without a job to be an actor. And then make no money and then get into real estate to pay the bills. They just sort of assumed I would go get a real job eventually. Um, and being a realtor they did not consider a real job. Uh you know thirteen years ago, um, and the world's different now. And uh you know. I started by just doing little rentals. I was just trying to pay rent. I didn't want to move home. That was it. Like the biggest fear of my life was moving home. It's like, if I move home, I will like it's that is failure to me. I can't come to New York and then move home, so I'll never come back. I'd have to go do something else. So I need to just make it work. Um, I just need to stick it out and make it work, and I'll figure it out. And so kind of I would just go month to month trying to figure out how to pay rent, rent departments for college kids, make some money, put a little bit of money away, make some rent, and keep going and going going. But I knew that with every deal that I did, as long as I talked about the next best deal, those are the types of clients I would get. Right. So, if I was doing a thousand to three thousand dollar a month leases. I would only ever talk about and promote the three thousand dollar a month deals because those people would get me the thirty a month referrals and friends because no matter how rich you are, you have problems, and rich misery loves company more than anything, so those people want to hang out with people who understand their problems, you know. So uh yeah, So I would just I kept kind of pushing myself up in the price category that way, and then I got my first building to sell, and then from that I got my next building. And then I randomly walked into a casting call for Millionaire Listing New York for Brava with three thousand agents, um, and they asked me why I was there, and I told him because I was the greatest in real estate broker in the history of the world. And they were from l A so they didn't know, so I uh and so they were like, really take it till you make it. It's sort of But I also if they asked me how many listenings I had, I would have said one. Like if they asked me how many deals, I doubt I would have said like four, Right, I think A lot of people fake it till they make it and they lie or they're disingenuous, and that's I don't I don't preach that. Um, I believe that. At that time on I looked around at this crew of three thousand agents that were trying to get onto the show, and I was like, dude, I I am way better than all these people, whether they know it or not. Eventually, one day I'm going to sell more than all of these people. That they're going to cast the best real estate agent under the age of thirty and I was twenty six at the time. Um, Uh, they should cast me. So when they asked me why I was there, I believed, even if I wasn't it today, I will be it shortly, Uh, that I was the best and you should have you should you should cast me. Um. And then I took them around and showed them what my life was like for six hours, which was just mass craziness. And I think they were just so confused, uh rolling around New York um getting car sickness in the back of the car. And I didn't really know how to drive in New York City. Uh. They were like, Okay, well we'll he'll, he'll do. Um. But that's kind of how I how I how I got onto the show, and that's how I've gotten most of the clients like I, um, you know a lot of the big deal I sold a place. I don't do deals in Florida. I met a guy client. He asked me if I did things in Florida. Said yeah, absolutely, Yeah. It's like, all right, well, I'd like to go find a place in Miami. No problem, okay. I learned the Miami market and one day sold him a place for thirty three million dollars two days later. Um. Because he believed in the energy right energy energy right. If you if you feel like you shouldn't be in the room, the people in the room are going to know that that's how you feel, and they're gonna treat you that way. What's like a like a typical like a typical work day for you, like rise, grind, like and I go through like I want the details of just like what you eat. I just feel like you're kind of one of the I don't know, you're one of those people that I feel like I can I'm like vibing with I just would like to know a little bit of your day to day. Um, so Monday, so Sunday through Friday when I'm in New York. Um, I wake up at four, I do email still for thirty. I go to the gym from five to six thirty. I get the baby at seven, put the baby to her mom with milk. Right around then, Um, a shower, get ready. I go to work around seven. Um, My day is booked kind of on the fifteen minute mark. From eight to eight. I intermitted fast. So I eat starting at twelve and I stopped eating at six. I use a service called food adders, and they come in little cartons this way, so this is my steak. I gotta finish eating here. Um uh. And I'm in appointments or calls or filming or creating content. My number one focus all day long is brand. I gotta push brand in any way, shape or form. If it's from a sale, I'm pushing brand. If it's from X, whatever, it is, pushing brand, brand, brand. Because real estate is my oak tree, right, that's the tree, Like that is it nothing I will never do. I mean I don't want to say never, but the oh, the tree and the roots are real estate sales. Everything else is my branch. And so I've always got to bring it back to the real estate. And then they do other things, have the sales, course of the books, of the different TV shows, the content studio. We put out tons of content across all platforms, and now I have the new brokerage, um uh and everything else that kind of comes with that. I'm like, I'm like kind of obsessed with you. Your hat has gratitude, Yeah, it does. Her own hats, my own hat. Yeah, that's awesome because my last name is rad you know, so it's like Tanya's gratitude. Get it. But I love when you say a routine. I think that was something that really, uh, you know, struck people when the pandemic happened, because a lot of people are shook from their routine. And I'm I'm such a creature of habit and I'm not gonna lie. I lost a little bit, even though I still have my routine, because you know, it's hard, it's really hard. And the fact that you wake up, I mean, you don't start your day job, I guess whatever until eight o'clock, but you're up at four to em Jim baby, like that you have given me. I I needed some of that right now, and you just gave it to me, so I really appreciate it because I needed that. Well. Thanks, Listen, I am the stame way. I have a lot of friends and all the clients who are way more successful than me, and no way ever what they wake up it for. So that doesn't work for them. But I know it worked for me. And what works for me is is kind of what you just said. Right. I'm a creature of habit I need that routine. So even quarantine, we left, right, We left New York because all the police in the city, Um, We're saying, and they were dead serious, We're locking down the bridges and tunnels, right, We're going to close down Manhattan, um. And that was what the word on the street was. Because if New York City is the epicenter, new York City is this big, why let it continue to spread and people are going to keep leaving, so let's lock it down. They didn't do that, right, they just did shelter in place and really advise you not to um. So we left that Wednesday before the city shut down. On Sunday, went to New Hampshire and the first thing that I've realized when I got to New Hampshire was weight. That's not vacation, uh crazy. I still have to deal with work clients like what do I do? I do this, and so I just kept with the routine. I did like FaceTime workouts. They sucked, like well, right, I ran around the lake in the snow. It was terrible. Still did it, um uh. And then the day was just the best part about it was I just didn't have to do dinner events or anything. Right, So my day is just sort of quote unquote ended early, which was kind of the nice part about it. But I think the routine is really important because it keeps you focused in the work. And I'm the type of person where if I don't have that routine and like, all Hell's gonna break loose. So I gotta like, I gotta keep myself in my lane. Yeah, That's what happened to me in the beginning of the pandemic because we would do so I do a morning show in the morning, so I'm up early, and then we did the podcast in the afternoon, and I was just kind of sitting around the house like doing nothing in between, and I would get into do the podcast and I would be so just like drained and sad and like had no energy, and I was like, I need to like shake up my routine because I can like this isn't me, Like I need to figure this out. So now I like put my runs in the middle so that I can go out and get air and energy, and like, yeah, it's figuring out what works for you for sure. Yeah, I'm I'm not committed to any sort of routine. I do best with no routine. I like get just like I get bored with routines. So like, even if I try to do it consistently, I'm like, I don't like it, and I think it's important now. And I did this a lot during UM and talk to a lot of people about it. I would spend during the day either thirty minutes or an hour, right, you call it kind of call it like your future hour, right if you have the time, or your future ten minutes or your future thirty whatever it is your future fifteen where you just sit by yourself and think about the future and what you want, right and just imagine it, just think about it. And I am telling you there is no better way to create your success than thinking about it every day, just a little bit, just forcing yourself to think about it like if you want that island vacation or that thing, and it can be material, I don't care, like it can be stuff like you want that tesla, you want that thing, you wanna, you want a million dollars, you want whatever it is, right, if you want your podcast to be talk, whatever it could be. Just think about it for ten minutes. However much time you have um and write down what comes to your head. You'll end up manifesting and brainstorming so many things that you hadn't even anticipated because you're actually going to ask your brain to wait, stop thinking about all the bullets for a second, and just think about the future, and it will change your life. I'm telling you this is so I'm literally gonna put future five I think future five five or fifteen minutes, which I give it. It's gonna take you five to get into it, and then the last you're gonna be thinking about getting out of it, so you'll have a good five in the middle. Okay, I'm gonna put future fifteen in my calendar every day for the next two weeks to get like, to get it in my retraine and then email me, Yeah, what's your Well, I guess I can I can figure you. I'm like, what's your email. I'll I'll get your email from our producer. But yeah, honestly, I'm so grateful. I'm sure you have other podcasts and other things to do because you have such a routine, but I'm really really grateful that you're on on the podcast. I know. I'm yeah, I have something to say. I need to say something before we let them go. I want to know, like, what are three things that someone needs to get the big money energy and like get kind of in that space of thinking and future thinking and success thinking. Sure, um, well so three things. Listen, There's there's a lot to do, Okay, Um, but if I had to break it down into three steps, uh, you First you have to remember, okay, that we all have the raw material needed to be the absolute best version of ourselves. We just most often than not, we keep it inside, right because rather embarrassed of what we think the best version is, we feel like we have imposter syndrome. We don't feel ready. I still want to wait to know I'm not there yet, whatever it might be. And oftentimes, right oftentimes maybe that best version of ourselves existed for a moment in time, but then someone took it away from you. Maybe it was a past boyfriend who was a dick. Maybe it was a teacher professor who was an asshole. Maybe it's your parents who told you weren't good enough. Whatever it might be, right, but there's three things to start doing kind of get that back right, because we all had it when we were babies. Like I have a two year old she's and she doesn't give it about anybody. Only later, once we start to understand social pressures and the habits of others, do we start to kind of keep that on the inside and kill it a little bit? Um So first, right, big one the energy is knowing about is knowing what you want and actually getting it and devising a plan to go and get it. Because nothing is out of reach, so why not you? So you write down, like literally right down to determine who is the future you and can be ten years out for you, It can be two years, it can be a year, it could be five years, it can be whatever you want for me. Right now, when I think about future Ryan, I think about that's a that's an easy date for me to think of, right that's ten years from last year, and ten years goes by like that, So I think about who is that guy? And what am I doing today? So that when I become him, which is going to happen before I know it, he's going to be so happy and whatever I went through today that he's gonna go back in time and shape my hand, Like what can I do for that? So figure out who that future you is? Right, then you need to do an energy audit. So an energy audit means you got to get comfortable with criticism and embrace self awareness, which a lot of us also shy away from. Right, we're all way too nice to each other because we don't want to hurt each other, right, we don't like confrontation, So everyone's always great and he's a do you, oh my god, you look so beautiful? You don't look beautiful? Right, today's an off day, But you don't want to say that to everybody, So when you're ready, you ask for it. Okay, Like I made one big deal when I was younger, when I first started, and I thought I was the man, but I absolutely was not. I had to get real about how I looked, how I communicated, and how knowledgeable I seemed. And so a way that you can do This is you can ask a friend who you honestly trust, or a family member or anybody and to say, hey, if you were to describe me to someone else without using my name, what would you say? Am I the funny one sentence to humor? Who's lazy? What? What? What? I could be honest with me, just be totally just let it rip. Be prepared though, because what they're going to say is now your definition to the world, how the world perceives you. And if what they say to you is okay, great, now listen. They might say things that you don't agree with. It all okay, ask somebody else. That's totally fine, right, but you need to be very well aware of how you're perceived to the world, how you look, how communicate, and how knowledgeable you've seen. Right, So that's a little exercise. And then third is you need to stop waiting for opportunity and start becoming an opportunist because you have the power to make your own magic. I mean, my career really took off and I realized I didn't need anyone else to provide me with opportunities because opportunities were everywhere. If you're comfortable with being uncomfortable, um, which means having that future right, Like, let's go and actually create things. You know, how many cold emails did you send today? You know you want to do interviews with crazy people, ask them, just reach out. What's the worst they're gonna do? Say now, okay, follow up in a week. In a week the best deal I ever did. And I guess we could we could end it here. Um uh. I met a wife who wanted to buy a place. She was from New Jersey on the Upper East Side, a budget up to around a million bucks yourself, um. And she never ended up buying anything, but I followed up with her and her husband. Um. And I followed up every other week for seven years. Seven years later, the husband wrote me back um and asked to reach out and talk. And so we talked and he said he had gotten divorced. He said he remembered when his wife was looking for a place and said that he was kind of looking for his own place. And two days later now I guess it was four days later Monday Thursday. Um, I saw him a place for sixteen million dollars and so um. But it took me seven years sending emails. But emails are free. It's free. Yeah, right, so what's to stop me? So what's to stop anybody else? Be opportunity what you want? Those are free ways to start. Those were really I am re listening to this podcast and taking notes once once we're done for today. So good. Um, Like on you said, I know that your schedule and what you said is booked back to back, but we so appreciate your time, like you were so informative and I feel like everyone listening will take something away. So thank you for your time and um scrubbing in today. Yeah, and I am going to email you, so look for that email. She'll email for seven years, so make sure line subject line gratitude, So I'll make sure to look for it. Okay, make sure your publicist tells our book. I don't even know how it happens, but make sure that they know that I'm cool. All right, Thanks Ryan, thank you so much. Bye bye bye. You're like, I'll find me. I will find you. That's crazy, though, sent an email for seven for seven years, and then he sold a sixteen million dollar home worth the efforts to say, so, I don't know that I have it in me to be that like persistent, Yeah, persistent and um hm confident, I guess because it takes like a certain level of just confidence that you're gonna wear that like you're gonna win. After seven. I was gonna ask him if he was an impatient person, but I feel like I feel like he's not. I think I could see him. Yeah, I was gonna say I could see like with long term goals he's patient, but with like everyday things, maybe he's like, I need it and I need it now. Oh my gosh, that was crazy. Yeah, that's really cool. I I think because I'm in this headspace and wanting to buy, which I had so many more questions for, it's like I could have I need to do, Like I might have to send an email to with a lit some questions. He's like, who gave her the email? But we should get somebody for a million dollar listening l A since they like probably know the l A market, you know. Yeah, I think just talking to someone though who's in the the space. Um, it's just interesting and I like that a lot of what he's done has been focused on your future and what you due to reshift your attitude about you know, or if you're in a mundane spot of just feeling like everything feels repetitive and you're wanting to feel boost of something new. I like that. That's kind of where his where he's spocused. Yeah, there is something about that because when you you always talk about imposter syndrome, and I think I have it too. I just have never identified it or no, but I think a lot of people have that feeling of like, oh, I'm not supposed to be here, like why am I here of other than someone else? And having like him going into that casting and being like, well, I'm the best agent there is while he's still very new to it. It's a powerful tool to have that. Wow. Yeah, it was really cool. He's got a new fan in me. All Right, we are going to take a break and we'll be right back with some emails. Okay, we are back, and we have some hard hitting emails. Mark. All right, this is from Alicia. She says, I'm thirty two. I live in Dallas. The last month or so has been the hardest of the pandemic. I'm feeling overwhelmingly lonely, and I'm finding it harder to be happy. I have great friends and family who I talk to you daily, but that can only replace in person interactions. For so long. What do you all do to fill your days, specifically the weekends. I mean, I think this is really good for you to take the lead on answering because you you live alone and I don't. On my sister lives with me, So I like, I actually constantly a people around. But it is it is related, believe. I mean, I've got a wife and two daughters. But I gets, you know, the week with the work week is over and like yeah, work weeks over in this Saturday afternoon, like so there's nothing to do, nothing to do? Who wants to play you for the fiftieth time? You know? Like yeah, you know, I do think and again it's just like, you know, very tanya of me. But I started doing festive Fridays and I would get dressed up. I'd pick a theme for the Friday and I'd get dressed up and I would order that specific food whatever is UM. And you can zoom with people if you want to FaceTime, do FaceTime with people. If you do have any friends that you have seen like a part of your quarantine, UM, you can do it with them too. I found that to be really like fun and something to look forward to. UM during the pandemic. So I suggest festive Fridays and then I don't I mean, I don't know. I don't want to encourage people traveling, but honestly, being away for the weekend, really it just brought me energy. You know, um, even if you can go somewhere where you're outside and just connecting with people, UM, I don't know necessarily like what's open around you and you can wear a mask, but I do think that there's something, um, really energizing about energy from other people. So whether it's through zoom and just like making a plan to do that and like setting a day being intentional about it and making it fun versus just like rogue face timing and like you know, doing just talking to people. UM, I found that to be really fun. So festive Fridays were like a big thing for me. I also think I know a lot of people who have been really really um like quarantine and not leaving their house or seeing anybody who live alone. And I think a few of them I know have done things where they have made plans with a friend and decided to quarantine for whatever the suggested time frame is, like ten days or whatever. State quarantine don't see anybody and then meet up and see each other so that there's like even if it's in a park or an outdoor location or um, but just knowing that you've both taken the time to quarantine, because I do think, like for mental health, I really think it's very important to see people and like have these interactions and if you're just alone and all day, like I think all of us here have at least some human interaction most days. And I think that getting that even if it's going socially distance outside, which I don't it's probably cold in Dallas, but making an effort to see people, even if it's in once a week, one personal week. It's just like we're not meant to be isolated like this. And I think there's a way of being careful and respecting you know, the pandemic and COVID restrictions and everything, but also taking care of yourself because you have I mean, this is it like you have to take care of your mental state and your emotional state. And it sounds like you're kind of on that decline of kind of at your wits end, which I'm sure a lot of people feel too. So I would say make a plan and talk to, you know, see someone outside and make an effort to have some sort of interaction because we're all going to go crazy at some point if we don't do that. It's true. And one other thing that's good is is getting together with one of those friends and just walk in someplace, just having a destination. You're not facing each other, you're wearing masks. You know, it's safe, you're outside. We've been doing that. Starbucks about two miles from here, and we walk there on a pretty regular basis, just because it's something to do. You know, it's a quick thing, but you can make it into an all afternoon thing if you want to. And then you're getting exercise and fresh air and it makes the day go by. And it's all about killing time these days. All right, let's see who's next. I'd say it's Dr Rachel. Rachel says, my best guy friend of three years is in a year long relationship with his girlfriend, but he still somehow keeps me as an option. He's flirty just enough to give me the attention I need or want. He tells me I love you often, but I never say it back. He's never crossed any major physical boundaries with me, but just enough that if I were in a monogamous relationship with him, it would upset me. I would love to still be his friend, and but I want to stop picturing him as a potential future partner. Is this possible or do I have to just cut him out of my life? I imagine we're all kind of on the same page here. I think, I don't know, you don't even want this guy's your future partners? If he's nah hard pass Like, if he's doing this to his girlfriend that he's been with for three years, he's going to do it to you too. That's just so much better than that, like wolff, Yeah, that's right, your first choice potential And he is not respectful of either of you. Really, he's not respectful of his girlfriend. He's not respectful to you as his friend or whatever. Y'all are okay? So you know what though, because I think it's a lot again, we say this all the time. It's easier when we're not in this situation, So I understand. And I think the reason why you're so attached to this is because he's familiar and you have a friendship, so you know he's not a scumbag. And I think and this is sad, but I think a lot of women just are fear dating or fear getting to know other people because they think that men are just going to be sleazy scumbags. And I'm just generalizing, but I really believe that to be true, and I'm here to tell you that that's not the case. And there's so fear is such a strong thing. It's like it's crippling in so many ways. And that is something that I think cripples relationships because you just don't think you think this is the only man that it's compatible with you, or has a good job or whatever the things that you like in him as a friend. You think that, like, there's not anybody else out there like that, And I'm here to tell you that's not the case. So step on the other side of fear. Don't you deserve better? You really, really honestly do. And you know it too. I think you're just letting the fear cripple you. And it's not a bad thing because everybody does it. But at the end of the day, what you want is you want to partner that is loyal to you, loyal and that's not asking too much. You want a partner that's a teammate and a partner to you, you don't want to that's playing checkmate with other people. And I think, I mean, I think those are the two biggest things. Loyalty, respect and trust. Yeah, And I also think that if you keep him in your life and don't keep having this friendship or whatever is going on when you if you are able to meet someone in your head, like if you're able to meet someone else and start a relationship, he's not going to want you have in this relationship with this guy who's larring with you and sending texts, So like you're limiting yourself from first of all, meeting someone amazing because you're settling for this guy, and second of all setting yourself up to make your future partner feel insecure with the relationship with this guy who's doesn't have boundaries. Boundaries are very important, and you need to set someone with this guy because you are a bad be and you are first choice and not side whatever fling. Boundaries are like the key to life. They're hard though, it's hard to set, and normally we have to set boundaries with the people that we love, like the people that we care about the most, Like those are the ones that we actually have to set boundaries for a lot of the times, and it's hard, Like I'm really working on learning to set boundaries with, but it's with people that I don't necessary. I don't want to have to set boundaries with. But it's tough because she likes that there's no boundaries here. She likes that he says I love you. She likes that he's a little flirty and a little physically flirty, but not too much. She likes that. So and that's the problem. Well, we all like that, we all like attention in that way, not from not from a guy with the girl, imagine a girlfriend. Yeah, it's just not good. No, I'd be like, don't touch me. What's your girlfriend's Instagram? Because I'm gonna let her know. Oh, there was this. There was a post in the Facebook group about uh. I don't know if any of y'all saw it, but basically, um one of this a girl that's a scrubber, her friend her the guy and the girl are both like good friends of hers, and she found out that the female is having a cheating on the fiance and they're supposed to get married, and she decided she's just going to go through with the wedding, and so the scrubber was asking, like, I don't know what to do because they're both my friends, Like do I just stay out of it? Do I take myself out of the wedding and hope that she, you know, eventually that forces her to tell him, because he asked, like, why are y'all not friends? You know? I was like, that is tough. There was a lot of mixed reviews on like people saying saying, stay out of it, it's not your relationship, and then people saying you should let him know so that his life isn't you know, ruined by this girl. She's friends with both of them, she's both of them. I would encourage my girlfriend to tell the guy that she's been I think she did. I think she's told her and she said, I don't care. I think she's just kind of she's pretty casual about her from what she said. I was in this very situation a number of years ago, um where the guy was cheating on the girl and they were in a very serious relationship, and I was friends with both of them, and I remember talking to someone else, come like, God, I feel like I should I should tell her because she thinks this is this great guy and he's acting like a piece of garbage and and I understood It's like this wasn't my place. I figured it will come out, like it will resolve itself, you know, because these things always do. And that that was almost a decade ago and they're still married, and it doesn't seem like it ever came out. And so maybe that secret dies with me. Who knows. God then that was in the pot. Did you like kind of remove yourself from the friendship or did everything just stay normal. I distanced myself definitely from the dude because I was like, I told him, I was like, this is this is horrible and uh, and you should tell Monica what you're doing and uh, but he he didn't want to hear it. And so I'm not his friend anymore and I don't talk to her very much. Uh, they seem very happy. If all him on Instagram. It seems like we're having a nice time. Wow. I know, it's weird. It's like you and I know we always have a kind of differing opinions on different relationship advice of like when to stay out and when to speak up. But I do think it's it would say a lot without you saying anything if you backed out of the wedding and said, like, I'm not going to be a part of it, I don't support it, And it almost would force her to answer the question that he would have of why that happened without you having to be the one to tell I don't know. It's one of those where I go, I'm not a professional, seek professional advice or listen to Easton it's essentially professional advice. Um. Well, on that note, I'm gonna go sit and think for fifteen minutes about what my future looks like. I wait to put that in my calendar every day, my future fifteen And you want to know what's crazy about that? And when he said this, I've actually started to do something with my neighbor Aaron. We both were just kind of talking about how we have a hard time like working in our homes. Now like we can get through the work that we need to do what we can't we're not like inspired to you know what I mean, like push the envelope a little bit. And so we're tag teaming and we're doing we're like like, um, you know, people do like future planning and they have like their like baby classes and stuff where they do lamas class and like future family planning or whatever like that. We're doing future planning and we're keeping each other accountable. We're gonna do it together, um somewhere outside like at like a park or something nearby where we just like carve out like once a week time together holding each other accountable to plan our future for doula classes and stuff. For doula classes and stuff. Rebecca, Rebecca cool Becca, Yeah, cool Becca, not to be not to be uh confused with me. No, it's very different than you. Yeah, because she's cool, because you're cool. That's great. Yeah, yeah, very different from you. Becca, you're my best friend. I obviously think you're the coolest person ever. But she has like a different like energy, Like she's very calming and just like cool, and there's like no way for her to dig herself out. So like we could just let this continue as she tries to explain, but my feelings might get hurt at that point. Um her, when you meet her, you'll understand the energy. Okay, can't wait beca the dola, the cool cool Beck of the doula. Um. Okay, on that note, we have to go, but I really hope that we see a lot of you this week for the Galantine to Day event. Um, we have some fun guests coming on. We have a best friend competition Tanya and a best friend of hers versus me and a best friend of mine competing for who knows each other best? Oh, that's what we're competing again. I don't know something I didn't know. I asked like the newly Wed game. I think O type thing I asked for Quel, and I was like, I don't really know what we're gonna be, like the Selina lyrics verse Taylor lyrics. Yeah, I don't know what we're gonna get so great, I'm feeling great about it. Um. Anyways, I hope you all have a wonderful Monday and Tuesday. We'll see you on Wednesday. We love you, guys, Love you. Or maybe I can aske Becca my new best friend, y'all. Probably. I mean, I don't know how much you told her. You might be able to. I don't know she might know enough to compete if I know you and I know col Becca. She naptily knows the size of my menstrual cup. Okay, well then she okay. On that note, we'll be back next week. Love you all, Love you bye.