Sauce On The Side With GandhiSauce On The Side With Gandhi

What's Wrong with Andrew?

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Published Mar 26, 2025, 7:00 AM

Sauce On The Side With Gandhi

Choppin' it up about life, science, entertainment, and everything in between, Gandhi (Elvis Duran Morning Show) is bringing audiences a no holds barre… 
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In this episode, Gandhi, Diamond, and Josh, try to help our listeners get to know Andrew a little better. Turns out, he's a monster.

Hey, guess what. Guys, Hey guess I said?

What what?

It's episode sixty?

Oh oh wow, we're almost two retirement. I call it a ARP. When someone turns sixty you can get a benefit, I know, but it's first of all, everyone can get a ARP.

I literally just said that. More off and running.

Hey, it's off on the side. I'm GONDI with my two favorite people, Diamond and Andrew, who I think are already about to fight each other. What's going on?

I love you, bessos.

So you know what I realized and Andrew as a producer of this show. A shame on you for never bringing this up. We were talking about from the time we started recording this podcast. I was going to interview everybody who was part of the show that didn't have a microphone. Yeah. I haven't done abby yet. Fine, Uh, you slipped right under the radar.

I feel like you've gotten to know me enough from doing enough episodes. I've spoken about enough things.

There's so much more to Andrew than people know.

Okay, here we go. It's going to be making a murderer pretty much. Do the Netflix documentary. Basically, here we go.

Well, I mean, where should we begin? What do you think that people want to know Do they want to know about the stickers? Do they want to know about the dog?

The dog?

We can get to all of these things. Great, well wait, let's start here. Andrew, what what would little attitude? I also find it funny that people Andre's so sweet.

He's not. No, he's not.

The Only people who see it are Diamond and me and Josh. Josh sees it.

Too, and every group chat that you've annoyed everybody to see it that way. And then I just sit in the group cho I don't even say a word, and it's like it's not responding.

I can't help that all the group chests that we're in together pick on you. That's not my fault because you turn it against it.

I do agree.

Not your little friend Nick. Your little friend Nick started that, and I just sat back and was like, Wow, everybody hates Andrew.

It's turd twirlers.

I don't even know what that means.

It's just an insult.

Nailed it. I'll never recover, Andrew, how do you want people to know you? What do you want people to know about you?

That I'm not evil? Yeah, okay, this is my episode, so I will reinforce that I would like people to know I'm not evil. I'm actually very nice and I think helpful.

I think nice.

People don't have to play there nice. If somebody's nice, don't other people just say, oh my god, they're so nice.

They do? And then what happens is you squawk in, Yeah, fly on in, he's mean. Squaw you don't know him.

Squawk Wait, who am I squawking for in that one?

You parrot her? You parrot Josh, You parrot Nick. Oh, I have no original thought.

I thought I was a ringleader of the people who hated you.

Yes, all lies.

It is my So back on track. So, yeah, nice and helpful.

In the grand scheme of like characteristics and qualities, what you want people to say about you is that you're nice and helpful, and.

Then I have a good heart. I look out for people.

It's not kind of the same thing.

Yeah, okay, Yeah.

Interesting, Andrew, we were having this conversation not too long ago. I would never want someone to describe me as nice, not because I'm not nice. I just think that's one of the most boring adjectives out there.

He's a nice story, he's a loser.

I don't think it's boring.

It's incredibly boring. It's just like you would say that about it, like literally, people walk by in the hall and how you doing?

Mmm?

Do I mean it?

Though?

No? I could say someone's nice, but I may not mean it, but genuinely think that I am an. I come with good intentions.

But that's a better way to say it than isn't it. He's a well intentioned No, he's a well intentioned person. He's a kind person, he's a generous person.

Great. I like all three of those as that from now.

On, those are just better adjectives than nice. Nice is so boring.

So you edit this thing. Cut where I said that, and I'll start over.

You know what, people, how boring you are?

Can you? Okay? So what was the question again?

Nice? Try You're not getting to this. He's gonna try and slide in there.

I forgot what the questions ask?

Can you?

Can you try it again?

No?

We asked, it was asked an I'm well intentioned?

That was a great question. I think I'm well intentioned, generous? What was the last? Do the whole thing?

Diamond? How would you want people to think of you?

Why are you asking her? It's my episode. Oh wait, I could respond to that, I'm.

Diamond and we laughed through the whole thing. Diamond Cooper, only la la la la, go ahead and answer the question.

I would like people to think that I almost said nice.

Well, if that's what you guys feel, use the word nice. It's like vanilla cool to be around that.

I'm a good time, you know. Fuck off?

Man?

Oh my god, Now it's my turn. Now it's my turn.

Maybe your turn, but it's my episode.

Oh do you want?

Okay?

So do you want to spend time talking about since he's so nice and helpful? Do you remember the time that he tried to help us while we were off the grid and then he went off and ran off with some girl.

Oh that girl that you had sex with on our trip?

Oh, yeah, here we go.

What was her name? With the smoker's voice?

I was scared of her. I'm being honest and.

So scared that you volunteered.

People say that I have a voice for radio.

She took you right to name. I don't remember, man, what was your girlfriend's name? Andrew? Why are you playing so innocently?

You don't know her name?

Into the woods and have sex with a lady.

Yep, she drove the r V to the spot.

Yeah, to the spot and he got it on.

Andrew seemed like he was driving to the spot.

Wow.

A lot of touching, a lot of All we know is Andrew was supposed to try and find us some sort of place to broadcast from, and then he vanished with this woman for quite a long time, came back looking disheveled, ravaged, out of breath.

It was crazy, stand porters. I was just walking and it was the altitude.

Convenient excuse, Andrew, altitude convenient excuse. I do Wait, So yours is that you're fun to be around?

Yeah, and that I mean well by people. Okay, you know okay, yeah, uh. I could be a little bitch sometimes too, So yes, know that. But that's it.

I think both of you are so far off on yourselves. But if that's how you want to be remembered, I guess I can't really Well, what.

Do you Okay, I don't even want to know. I don't want to know.

I would say, okay, So I would say Andrew is a very kind person for the most part. I would say he's devious.

Yes, I would.

Say he's he's like a multi tool He's like a pocket knife. You could plug him into a lot of different scenarios and he'd probably be very helpful in these scenarios. Also, not sure you really want to travel with him? You know, yes, yes, my poka, Wow, I love that.

That makes so much sense.

I agree, you traveled with me twice.

Why do you think I'm saying this?

Oh? So, I guess I'm not going to be on the next off the grid trip.

Of course you are. I love you. You know what I would say about you. I think you're a good sport for the most part until he gets into his little dark place and then he just starts. You can tell when Andrew's flustered because he just mimics you. So if you say, Andrew, shut up, Inky, get it, Andrew, what are you doing? What are you doing?

That's how you know he's at the end of his road.

He is itching to do it right now, He's itching.

Nope, I got nothing. But I will say Diamond was pet parroting squad do it, squawk.

I think you are actually a very fabulous person, and I would recommend people hanging out with you. If there was someone that I would say, who are you gonna have a good time with you. Definitely have a good time. And he's terrible in an escape room, but that's a different story.

I'm not going to get into it because you're trying it. You're trying it, and I'm not going.

To do it.

He's always like, I'd be so good on Survivor, I'd be so good an escape room. There's an escape room. Everybody, wake up. We're going to an escape room. Andrew's ass would have had us die in that escape room.

Absolutely not. He was breaking things. Yeah, that's a part of an escape room for me. A part of it is you test it to see if it's supposed to be on the wall.

And you were breaking thing.

He literally went in there and just immediately moved a bunch of starfish that the people had to like come in and be like you need to put the starfus back on the wall or else.

You're going on?

Was it on bel Crow? Why was it on bell Crow? I'm asking the.

Question put them back. You haven't reached that point yet. He walked in, ripped the trident out of this mermaid's hands.

Pretty sure he broke it again. I'm asking the obvious questions.

Solved, not one question. Those are the things I would say about Andrew Diamond. I would say, is loyal, agreed, fun, agreed, is stubborn?

Oh okay, you know you are.

You don't think your subburn?

No?

Oh, I didn't ask for you. White men don't get to speak on black women during Women's History Month, thank you.

Wow. Oh, this is probably what someone's of a racist.

And on Greek Independence Day, damn.

Wow.

So for people who don't know what that means. Andrew for the longest time thought that he was Italian since his last name is poulieres Am, I saying.

That my dad tries to see that at restaurants. I love my dad so much. In the like past couple of years, he's developed an accent when he'll say certain words, and one time he was like trying it at a restaurant and he's like, I'll take the brush and I was like, he said, like he was choking. They he meant for judo, but the way he said it was like we ula and the person brought out brushetto, which is just the tomato toast, and it was like, I'm talking a platter of just brushetto and he was like, oh, no, I meant brush, it's like, just say it like that. Then. My biggest pet peeve is when people put accents on things.

When they try to pronounce words correctly, you get mad. This is so colonizing of you.

Yes, I know, I'm terrible with accents. So I'm not going to go to a restaurant that has a casadia and go I'll take that gave whatnot? It's a casadia. I'm not going to butcher your language. I'm not going to attempt it. I will either point at the casa wow or the faida. I'm not gonna goa that's not me. I am not hilarious. It's a silent ja.

I'm not going to do it is not silent. It's actually pronounced like an age. All you have to do is say faia.

Okay, so I'll say fahida.

Great.

Tell me where you went to vacation without putting an accent on it. Load, Oh, I went to Milan. You went to Milan. Babes went to Milan.

But wait, isn't that respectful to show people that you're trying.

I think it could go two ways, and for me, it goes the second way. It's great that you're trying to immerse yourself.

I know you didn't care about other people's cultures. I do learning about Andrew.

Wow, if I went to India and said and tried to be like, I'll take I don't even know how to say like sag pannier, but I tried it with it. Whatever you just said was god awful. How should I say it, soganeer, I'll take the sog pannier.

I didn't say panier. He said zog sag is wild. I so much rather somebody says so at the restaurant.

I'm not going to butcher it.

You are crazy. This is crazy. All this to say our Italian friend here, Andrew Puglici, recently found out he's not, in fact really Italian. He is mostly Greek and Albanian. And today March twenty fifth, which you'll probably hear this on the twenty sixth if you're listening on the day it comes out today is Greek Independence Day OPA, and he's really making a lot of demands today. Us So I thought you weren't pronouncing things of accent.

Now that's the asss, it's cheers, it's hi, le's goodbye, it's universal.

I mean, this guy is comedy.

He is, he's funny. I would say that about you. I would say you're funny.

Thanks.

But back to Diamond, Oh, we really got away from it because it started out with I said I would say you're stubborn, and you were like, I don't think I'm stubborn.

Then Andrew scoffed, I don't think I'm stubborn.

Not at all.

No, not at all.

Sorry I had to fall again. Oh, he's carrying himself over with Then.

I think I think it's I think it's a quality of I know you're not gonna like this, but like some my only children, I say semi only child children because you didn't grow up with your sister in your household, right, so it's like you and your parents, so you got to be the center of everything. Nobody ever beat you up when you were little, stole toys from you, kicked your ass around, Yes.

Yes they did. My cousins will come over every.

Week every weekend. Live with it.

You have to live with it.

We like fear that you might wake up to someone holding a pillow over your face.

Yeah no, that wasn't happening. Okay, But like, how does that make me stubborn?

I think. When you have an idea in your head, you will not stray from that idea.

Also, someone crosses you, they will never get back in. The door is firmly closed. On the podcast before Glue Concrete, I never even knew there was a door there.

Fort knocks, baby locked.

No, you won't let somebody come back ever, because that would then be stubborn, wouldn't it?

Okay? So maybe yeah, no, no, you can't come back.

My mom is the same way sign as you too, virgo not to make it harder, scopey, but it is weird.

Yeah, like no, you know, yeah, I wish I could. I can't do it. I can't do it.

What So you don't believe in second chances?

Not anymore? I used to do.

You think you deserve a second chance?

Ever it depends on what I do wrong to someone?

So never you don't think you've ever deserved a second chance, Or there's never been a time where maybe you've crossed somebody or done something wrong to somebody and thought, shit, I wish I could go back and fix that, if they give me a chance, I would like to. You've never had that feeling stuff.

Maybe, but I think that I I overthink things before I do like a lot of things, so like I consider people's feelings a lot more so, like I go out of my way to make sure, like I don't like hurting people's feelings and stuff like that.

I think that's a good way to describe you too. I would say you're definitely considerate, Oh, thank you, fun, loyal, I think you're interested, okay, and things. I think I think you are, and I think that's good. Like curiosity is a really to me, such a green flag in people. I think you're curious.

I didn't say anything. I'm sending your mind in my own business.

Cool, are you? That's another thing? He doesn't know how to mind his own business? Yeah, he jumps in explain, Well, maybe it's because I'm a gossiper. Oh, you always know that you can get the gossip out of me, or you think you can. So you're like, what happened? What's going on? So you're walking down the hall talking to that person. What were they saying?

Yeah, speaking of I got something to talk about you after this, So I want to get the gossip on it.

I can't wait. This is excited.

I hope I haven't.

I would genuinely like all messing around the side. I don't really have any bad things to say about either of you. I think you're both really good people, which is why I'm happy that you're part of the podcast, and hopefully in some capacity I can keep you guys. So you have to be every part of every episode. I got it with him, yeah, or we can work on that. We can take him out if we want. He's barely here anyway. Shows up for like, let's talk about your March. How many days did you actually work in the month of March.

I work every day. It just may not be here.

Yeah, maybe he's in Disney. It was just sad.

But guess what, I still did all my work in the morning.

That's fine. I'm just saying, how many days did you report to work?

So it's interesting that you said I was Elon.

Musky and tell me five things you did this month.

I did. Oh my god, that's funny you made.

That was good.

That was a flip. I did all my stuff in the morning. I don't understand. It's your job and my job is here. Do you know what it is? It's to sit out there so you could come run by my desk and then go fuck you.

Yeah, and were you here for that?

No, so I missed work because I didn't get that, not one time.

Okay, I don't like you being gone.

Oh thanks, No, I have no one to take things out one hey, Diamond.

Well you're the rageous building.

And oh absolutely, as soon as you got back, I kicked that box I.

Fire desk you did. Actually, that was your welcome back. It was a middle finger and a kick.

And that's how you know. I love you.

Thanks.

I just want you to know that. He says he gets all of his work done in the morning, but yet he loves to talk about the fact that he's here until three pm. So what are you doing going to get after we're going to get macha.

No, not going to matcha.

Damon Hi five from across the room, ma'am. But if you got all your stuff done in the morning, but you stay until the evening to get all your podcast stuff done, who's been doing your podcast stuff while you're gone?

I still was doing it.

So you didn't get your stuff done in the morning, So you lie, So you're a liar.

I don't need to give a time sheet.

If you can pull out your phone right now and tell me what's on your for You page, Diamond. You two, well, okay, let's see my for you page is Oh god. The first thing that pops up is Kim and Kanye. The second thing that pops up is the difference between a rich person's thumb and a poor person's thumb. What yep? Then I have some girl dancing in a locker room. Then I have you guys remember prison Bay, Yes, yeah, I have him. You know why he's on there. I've got Scott Peterson and slowly rotting in prison through the years.

Oh my god, mine is the problems with Amelia Perez.

Oh I remember specifically when you were sitting at your but you're at your actual desktop typing in things looking.

For mine is what's real OCD versus not OCD?

Where are you seeing this?

Just like here go to the little medical Yes, okay.

People going to Disney, which actually super bothered me because I think it knew I was in Disney. I got to shut off my location services.

It's definitely knows you're in Disney.

I hate Disney bloggers. I've decided I hate Bean Park bloggers. I can't do it.

Is it your best friend coaster boy Josh?

He's not a blogger.

But he got his name because he would review roller coasters.

I get that, but I'm talking about jos in here. I'm talking about new age people that sit there and they are like, cur are five things that you need to try the next time you're at Walt Disney World, like, shut up, can do it?

Inane?

It just bothers me. Yeah, that's I don't really have. Oh in doxins, A lot of doxins.

I feel like you've skipped over a lot of things that are probably on that page, because you can't only have five things on your page.

I got white lotus, A millennial mole. I don't know what a millennial mole is. Let's see, do I have it? I do what? Wait, they're saying millennials on the inside of their wrist have the millennial mole.

Inside of a Oh I have I have one?

This I don't have any more.

Let me see. You don't have anythingn't see that's the inside of yours, that's literally outside. Come be serious, millennial.

I'm not good.

I don't think I have it.

I have something right here. You can't see it, but like like a TV test. Oh my god, wait no, but it looks like it a little bit.

I think my uh, this thing the male Yeah, the alopecia patch. I think it's spreading to my arms.

Your alopecia is spreading.

Yes, because I've noticed on my arm there's several spots that just stopped growing. Here.

Oh, here we go.

Interesting. What do you do about it?

If I go bald, I will legit, probably lose my mind.

I cannot.

There's a chance that you will.

Thankfully. My dad has a rich head of hair.

It comes through your mom's side. What does your mom's dad look like?

Well, he passed away, okay, at a very young age, so I don't know. Oh boy, what it could How old are you? Thirty three?

I feel like you would have already had little shades of bald Yeah, of losing your hair?

Yeah, how bad for so many people that are balding at this age, because yeah, that's that's intense.

Don't hair shame people. He comes in here and he flips the little curls around. I'm so excited about there he goes there, he goes good Lord, but you know, with hair plugs and stuff, now, it's really not that serious.

True to Turkey.

By the way, Andrew, trust me as someone who pretty much went bald. It does suck, so thank you for telling me that you would have killed yourself my life O Diamond, Wow.

Damn it, Diamond.

What's on your free page?

Someone drinking macha, a girl getting her hair done, somewhat what I eat in a day. I get a lot of those. I don't know why I'm interested. Some love Island news. What else? Someone with dandriff on their scalp. They're getting a treatment.

Don't you think the's like?

Really?

Sum us up though? Like that we are looking?

Yeah, my Facebook one is different. My Facebook one is like you ever see those yucky toe videos where they're getting their toes downe? No, what do you here?

Whenever I go on Facebook, which is not as often as I think I would like it to be, I feel like Facebook has sort of made a comeback.

Yeah.

I know Andrew's rolling his eyes, but I'm telling you.

Facebook is it?

Yeah?

Facebook is it?

Facebook is there?

Especially especially for the ethnics. I'm just saying, but mine a always shark videos, like stupid, unbelievable shark videos. Yeah.

I'm also afraid that half of the content that you see now is just AI stuff. It's so scary it's.

Gonna be the death of me because so much of it is people playing with animals that they would never be able to play with. Like I don't know if you guys saw the video of the polar bear that hopped onto the side of the boat to be rescued and then they invited it on and they were like rubbing its face.

It wasn't real.

It was completely fake. And you can tell because they've got like seven fingers when they're betting it. That's crazy, that's scary crazy.

What are you?

What is that you get that toe jam out of there?

ToeJam?

To get the toe jam, it's a lot of ingrown toenails.

And just touching it with their beer fingers.

Yeah, they're sick. It's either this or cake decorating videos. So I'm just back and forth.

That is not like look so good.

You see the ones where they're like, why is it choosing gloves?

Do you know what we never see by the way, Diamond's feet.

Yeah, no, they're disgusting.

When have you seen Diamond's feet?

Never?

Never, He's here. It comes to down, Josh grab it might take this one hold on, how would you describe Andrew.

To who to anyone about what time me out what.

I said, Tell me about your friend Andrew, how would you describe him? Because I asked Andrew how he wants people to think of him, Like, what does he want people to know about him? He said, I want them to think I'm nice and helpful?

Right, right, right?

Okay, I said, I think he's fairly he's a pretty kind person, but he's devious.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, but sometimes I feel someone who has that makeup goes above and beyond that to the point that it's kind of phony. Sometimes. Oh yes, it's just not reality, but it's like what he wants people to think, right.

Like performative. Yes, well, you're trying to cleanse your soul because you've done something like run over a marmot on our off the grid trip.

Oh yeah, I remember that thud.

I remember the thud, and I remember him not even stopping for a second. He just kept going.

Because you made the story up and then all convinced yourselves it was collective amnesia.

You've said before that and I won't say the situation, but that someone was being mean to you in life and you were going to take the higher road and be nice out of spite.

Yeah, I'll just say it. It was my aunt. I don't care and I still do it.

Yes, Yeah, that might be a good way to describe Andrew.

Yeah he rolled again, not doing it.

You're not getting any nice drive you also have. I'd say this like sassy meanness that I see in some other people sometimes like that. I know it's in there. I know deep down you have the cynicism and it comes out in some of your comments when you're roasting people, and it's like, I know it's in there, but he like presents like he doesn't have that.

But we know that is devious.

Mm hmm. So that's what it falls under. That's where you're categorizing it. And the devious folder got it?

Where would you put it?

I mean, I guess that's the folder for it.

Do you deny it?

No, Like, if I know somebody that I trust, I can do that, Like I like all of you. Therefore you know that part fair enough. I really connected with the Leslie Bibb comment on White Lotus this week, when Carrie Kon's character is sitting there being like, I'm just gonna say how I feel and she's like no, no, don't like, don't make this awkward, and she's saying, like, mind your managers, and she's like, one person's manners is another person's like respect to a certain way, or just kind of like.

You nailed it.

So much.

So he relates to that mega character.

Yeah, here we go myself.

He has the mega face. Remember that was like the most hurtful comment anyone ever left him.

Yeah, it was. I'm surprised Andrew support.

I don't think you have a mega face.

No, but somebody else did. They said, Oh, he totally looks like a maga.

Yeah.

They were like, I'm surprising Andrew was a Democrat.

Yeah, it's because this family owns you.

Again, wouldn't be working here, would not be working.

Here, he would because it's performative.

Nice Okay, Yeah, I could go perform somewhere else, on a different island, in a whole different country.

Josh, did you know that on our first trip off the grid, Andrew escaped into the woods with some lady with a very raspy voice. Came back looking disheveled and sweaty.

And I said it was the altitude sickness.

And he said it was altitude sickness.

Cat Cat.

It was cat cat with the deep raspy voice who muscled him into the woods. It was crazy.

Yeah, why would you do that?

You know why?

I could find a broadcast location.

Oh there was some broadcasting going on. I don't even know.

Good one.

They laughed, don't say the parrot thing, I'll kill you. Dad is a parrot.

Then oh the squawk? Yes, I love the squawk?

Thank you?

Oh you sold it from Josh?

No I did it.

No, it's his, No, it's his. But yeah, he uses it in a group chat regularly.

Yeah, I'll take what you say. In the minute. Somebody's like, I.

Feel that way too.

I'm like squawk, I feel that way to squawk.

So people aren't allowed to disagree with someone else's opinion.

No, because I could see the butt kissing. Don't try me.

Are two friends that are real crush on each other, so they just defend everything.

The other person says, yeah, so is it Tommy and Nick?

Maybe?

So we're trying to get to know Andrew in this episode because we've gotten in a lot of other people. What would you what would you think? Oh, by the way, really quickly, he said, people who like and review theme parks are freaks.

Okay, he what do you mean?

I meant, I was like someone about your best friend, coaster boy Josh, who used to review roller coasters and talk about them and loves a get theme park. I meant, Josh, that's what he said.

That is not what I said. And you're gonna tape Yeah, you're gonna play it with disjointed words put together. Hm, I said Disney influencers specifically, from when I was there this past weekend, all my feed kept showing me where people being like, I got Pixie dusted at Disney, your room got upgraded. Call it that, call it that. Please, for the love of Jesus, I can't. It annoyed me.

This is the cynicism that I'm talking about, right.

It was gonna take a while, but we got.

There at the same time. This guy, this is the guy that goes like four times a year.

I love it. It brings me so much joy.

Didn't you just skip like two weeks of work to take your mom there?

But also doesn't buy an annual pass, which would be like one thousand dollars cheaper than I.

Would like to say. I did ask for one for Christmas, and that was the one thing they'd be just skipped over that the gift.

Well, I mean, you've probably spent over two thousand dollars in tickets and they cost like half.

That And for sure, that's why I asked for one this year. And then when it came to Christmas, I was thinking, oh man, I'm gonna get it, not gonna have to pay for tickets this year. It's my nice Okay.

So then after you don't get it for Christmas, then you purchase it because it's the smarter financial decision.

But I didn't want to spend.

He doesn't care about decisions because his family almost yachts yep.

I mean, I I do have theories, like with how many movies he buys on Voodoo that there's got to be some sort of money coming in because he'll buy like five movies a week, add like twenty five bucks a pop, and it's like, I know what you make? Where is coming from? Andrew is a true gossip like that is a part of his personality. Like look at.

The time we got a.

Go on Josh, I just know he. I mean, that's why he has millions of group chats, Like did we notice about Andrew too? He has so he'll have like a main group chat. But then he'll have a side group chats based on that group chat, and then like go to the side chat of the group chat.

I was just like, everybody says this, but who started the last fourteen group chats? It wasn't me. I did start when yesterday though, but that was because I had an announcement I had to make to specific people.

What was the announcement?

I'm not going to say that here anyway.

Diamond, did you get the announcement?

You both were?

Oh wait, why was I in the group chat?

You are business?

Get that hell out of here?

Yeah?

Interesting? Okay, Josh, what else do you want us to know about Andrew?

Um?

Well, let me think about it for a second. I mean, I feel like we're only saying bad things, right.

No, I said a lot of good things about him. Okay, don't worry.

He's a very generous guy.

I said that. That was one of the words I use about him.

He's very he's very thoughtful. He is a supportive friend.

Thank you. Those are nice.

He's always there to listen.

Thanks.

That's probably part of this.

Is my moment. Let me have my moments.

How come we haven't done that to Josh yet?

This is my episode. See nice things.

Don't worry. I'll clean this up to make you look really good.

Yeah, I so believe.

I don't worry a lot of editing.

I said this. I said Andrew comes off as like the greatest two people who don't really know him, the nicest, sweetest, Oh how could you beat me? And Andrew? Oh my god, he's so lovely and amazing, when in reality he's a devious little bitch, which is how I told him he needs to do his his Survivor audition tape. Just act that way, be yourself, don't try to be the nice guy, be Andrew. It's important.

Yeah. Again, I think that'll probably I just would be a little worried. You know what. I wouldn't be worried that if I had to watch it back on TV and all the bad things i'd say about people, because honestly, they're probably all gonna be lame. Anyway.

Oh there we go.

See that should be in your audition tape.

Yeah. I mean I feel like the minute there's a camp counselor, I'd be out. I'd be like, oh god, they're trying to organize things or trying to make everybody like Kumbaya. I hate a Kumbaya moment. Hate it, hate them, I hate ough just annoy you hate.

Yeah, let's dissect this.

I don't like that. It just feels so just like culty to me, I just can't do it.

People share and joy.

It feels camp orientation leader. I don't like camp. I don't like that. Creeps me out, like hippie ishugh, like all living under the same commune. Mm hmmm mm hmmmmmm.

I feel like deep down inside of you have a lot of hippie like tendencies for sure.

But I'm not going to organize everyone. Well, as I've told Josh before, there's no such thing as an Italian hippie. But I guess you could also apply it to Greek and Albanian. You're not Italian, but yeah, there's no such thing as those does not exist, because I know somebody who's fundament like really tries to portray that image. No, No, that's not a thing.

All right, Yeah, I would say that's probably true.

No Italian hippies, well, like if.

Like maybe like Northeast Italians, Yeah, because like you're just raised around trains, so like, how can you be peaceful? Ever? Likes there's too many bombs there's too many con men, there's too many trains, like you're never gonna be peaceful, like it's it's wired into you by like five years old, properly.

I'm trying to think of the peaceful Italian person I know, don't.

You don't know what?

I'm not really caught up with any Yeah.

There's peaceful Italians. I think my mom is a peaceful Italian.

She used to scratch the glass at the zoo.

Did you know that about his mother?

What?

She's a glass tapper really at the zoo. He was like, this is how he posed it. Okay, he said, let me tell you something about Donna. Donna is basically like a big cat whisperer. We said, what tell us more? He said, she just goes up to the glass and she does this little scratch thing. And they all approached. We said, Andrew, your mother taps on the glass at the zoo and stresses the animals out.

Are you kidding?

And what did he say? Don't you dare talk about Donna. Don't you say a word about my mother.

Talk about my fucking mother? Yes, that is I mean, I feel bad, I see it.

I understand something about that family and what they do to animals. That's all I'm gonna leave in.

Oh yeah, Diamond wanted to share that about Does Josh know that story?

I don't know. Do you know that Andrew inappropriately touched a dog?

Do you know Diamond took a picture of a dog's inner leg and goes, that's the penis. No, there was no penis to be found. No.

See, you see how people try to twist stories. I know that I did what the women do, but no, no, no, no, that's not what happened.

And now every single person, when I see a dog, you go, he touches animals inappropriate.

H I'm like, keeping the dog away, save your dog.

So diamond story is that there was a dog laying on his back. Yes, and Andrew jerked it off.

Yes, yes, And she tells people this when I see a dog, do you know he touches him inappropriately? Meanwow? Miss I would take a dog if it yelled at me. Miss I'd keep the dog at home all day and walk it on a treadmill. Please.

Then there's the hamster story.

Oh yes, yeah, I don't.

Fully believe that, but the family did have a bunch of guinea pigs that did.

We had one guinea pig. It was Herman and it was Jackie's pet.

Is this the wing your dad ran over?

Oh no, that was a that was a hermit creb god Herman, our guinea pig. Jackie was the primary caretaker of Herman.

I was very explode.

No, he did not explode. Well, so what happened. What happened was Jackie did not realize that you can't just feed an animal. You also have to give it water too, So she literally just kept feeding it and it died of dehydration. Yeah, yeah, Herman.

And that was just one.

That we only had one guinea pig. I think that was the test to get a dog, and Jackie failed for us, then.

There was essentially guinea pig.

Want to look at that.

He was the guinea pig.

Of the My dad would do that intentionally too, like we go to guinea pig, it's the guinea pig and you failed. That's so something my dad would do.

And then you killed Nix hamster.

I never killed Nick's hamster. That is the biggest why.

We could call Nick right now and he would tell us one on nine eleven. Then he ran over the marmot.

I never ran over a marmot.

And then he jacked off a dog here we yes, I'm sorry, Andrew. There's a lot of smoke here. Usually where there's smoke, there's fire. We've got four separate stories of four different animal abuses coming from a mother who scratches the glass.

Yep, don't talk about my fucking mother.

I love doll She's great. She makes really good chicken parm she does Lapasta is amazing.

Raby olies are always good.

But it seems like animal mutation kind of runs in the DNA. Something weird. Disrespect of the animals.

They do have. The family does have a dog that has survived, Luna.

Yeah, yeah, she's a good girl.

But also Andrew knows that he can't get too close to really cute animals because he'll squish them to death.

I do have I call them Lenny hands.

Yeah yeah, and that phrase has truly taken off.

They're so big, they're uncoordinated.

Yeah, just crushing.

Things out here. Yeah, that's fine. Should we Does Josh know this story about the stickers? Does Diamond know the story about the stickers?

I have no clue.

Have you heard this go on? Andrew?

So we were really young. I was really young.

And thirty one.

We had a family that lived up the street and they were like a year or two older than me, and we went over their house and we went upstairs to their room and they were like, hey, like, do you like these stickers? And I was like, yeah, I like these stickers. And they were twins, and so then of course like it's me with two twin girls. And so then they're like, hey, do you want any of these stickers? And I was like, yeah, I want the stickers. And they were like, I'm real bad. If you like, take off your pants, you can get the stickers. And so I was like, duh, I'll get the stickers. You know when you're four or five years old? Yeah? Done? You were four or.

Five, Andrew the first time he told us this story, you were like nine.

No, I was four or five.

Mode it down for some stickers.

I did, and then I went downstairs. My mom was like, look at all these wonderful stickers. And I was like, do you know what I did? Toget them? And then my mom was like what We left very shortly after that. It wasn't I think that real? Uh, that was a hard.

So you went downstairs. You told your mom did you say it out loud for everyone to hear?

Yeah, it was really exciting. I'm talking These were the stickers that were like kind of puffy. You know which ones I'm talking about, Yes, oh, yeah, yes. And this was in the nineties when that was like the sticker heyday, because that was like at Leasta Frank stickers with the dolphins, the polar bears everything.

He could really jazz up a binder.

You really could.

What did the twins like parents say?

What was like? What?

I do not know because they learned this technique from Yeah, so true.

There's so many things to unpack with this story.

Yeah.

Also, it wasn't stick He didn't just pull his pants down, He pulled it all down.

Yeah, Andrew, you showed them your little dingle I did.

I didn't have been literally got a lot of stickers.

And to this day, Andrew loves a good sticker. So if you see him in the street, you can easily bribe him to take his pants off.

It's like a pavlog dog response stickers and oops.

Do you talk about how you like almost moved to Pittsburgh?

What I think he might was it around the time that you showed up for your interview here with a.

Suit on, and I almost moved there instead or something. Yeah, I would have been like a PR person for the bank.

That's insane. Sounds like, oh, well, PR for a bank that's.

Yea, and Pittsburgh.

We have listeners in Pittsburgh, Andrew, I met some very nice people from Pittsburgh, Samond she ran away from us. Ye.

I'm sure Pittsburgh is a wonderful city, but I don't think that would be good for me to move all the way there to do PR for a bank. That just sounds not great.

Andrew said he's dropped a lot of gems today. He said if he lost his hair, he would kill himself. I never said that he did, and I was like, oh, that happened to me. I'm still alive.

Not me.

I didn't say that.

Would you say, you're.

Going to try it? You're going to take what I said there, and then inserted, I'm not saying.

That I'm not in the business.

Cronkite in this interview. You nice try, Josh.

I do like the fact that as soon as you showed up, Andrew really became a monster. He was trying to hold up. He was trying to keep up the facade. Josh Watson, you know you can lie anymore. You need to be part of this more often.

I have a lot of Andrew stuff.

More go, Barbara Walters, it's your trance to tell us all Walter cronkite.

Barbara Walters, when's the last time you watched the news?

While?

He stopped watching after Nora O'Donnell.

I did. I the CBS Evening News. I really love the CBS News. I love it. I watch it at five. I go until seven because then inside Edition comes out and I like inside Edition? Is that Deborah Norville?

No, yeah, I think it's that edition is I don't mind it because I was an effect from not long ago and you were very specifically in all caps.

I don't love Devord Norville.

I like her. Sometimes the show uses weird sound effects that I dislike. It's not great. I don't like that one. But six point thirty that's my jam. But Nora o'donald retired makes.

Me so you just stop watching the news?

No, I still watch it between five and seven. That's my time. That's my news time for local news into the CBS Evening News.

Other stories.

Barbara Walters, he does need a haircut. Right now.

I do today.

Not too much though, because he'll kill himself.

Did he tell you about his barber that he drives an hour four Andrew?

I do.

Your family has yachts.

You keep saying that.

Drives an hour for a barber, unless it's.

How much he thinks they like needs his charge every two months.

So I'm like, it's all riding on him, and I feel bad. And he does do a good job with the haircut.

He has multiple barbers within walking distance of his apartment.

Oh, I know, I understand, but I feel bad, so I still go.

You drive an hour and a half. How much is the haircut?

It's an hour?

How much? Okay, how much is the.

How much does the hair fifty bucks?

Fifty bucks?

Fifty bucks?

And this is what you come back with after two months.

It's an electric car too, so you have to like stop and charge it at a mall. You'll like, I'll open up my find my friend and see Andrews just at like a mall, sitting still for like an hour.

It's like, oh, yeah, we all have each other's locations. How often do you check everybody else's I don't check.

Oh that's what he claims.

This is prejection from everyone else. I genuinely do not care.

I see you check people's locations before before a concert. We were at a restaurant. You checked to where Nick was exactly. I was looking to see where he was because you check it. So you check it.

But I don't sit there by myself and just open it up to be like, oh, where are my sims?

Did you not just say prove when I check it and I just gave you a point was coming there?

That makes sense to me. I don't sit there and just randomly check locations.

Never on the weekend. You've never been like, I wonder where Josh is doing location?

Because that's your privacy. I don't.

He's a liar if it.

If we want a privacy, we wouldn't share a location with you.

Yes, but I know it's not an app you fire up just to check it. It's like, oh, where's Andrew. I'm thinking about inviting him to something? What's he doing right now?

I think that way. I genuinely don't.

I promise the lady doth protest too much.

Because you're making me doth protest? Have you thought of that? Cool?

Do you check people's locations?

I do for I call people. I want to call someone, If they're not home, then I'm like, okay, I'll leave.

Them alone all Sometimes if I'm just like texting someone, I'm like, oh, where are they right now? When I'm texting, I just assume that they're probably at home, because if they're out doing things and be texting me. But a lot of times I'll be pick where you want.

I'll be like, I want to go to dinner. Is Andrew still at work? So I'll check his location?

But instead you'll see me at the mall charging my car. Got it?

Are you gonna get rid of that car anytime soon?

I mean it's a three year lease and I'm on year two.

Is that the car that you crashed Josh in.

Yeah, as I was incredibly vulnerable post surgery, I.

Picked you up and then crashed him. The lies and slander going in this story?

Wait, what about okay, Andrew? What about that story? Is untrue? You picked him up? He got lasick? Right?

Yes, So he's.

Blind in the car, trying to sleep because he's not allowed to see sunlight or open his eyes. He's just at your mercy.

I got Ray Charles in the seat next to me, sitting diamond.

Did you not know this?

Yes, but just the thought of Josh lay him back in the chair.

He's got his eyes with the glasses. Afterwards, he was just sitting there like this. I'm telling you, Ray Charles.

In this.

Just like that. Literally that, Yes, what's crazy?

He was.

I get out of the car. I'm like, oh my god, someone just hit me. I'm like, I don't know what to do, and there's Josh. Okay, the person gets out of the car. I think I probably looked in the car at one point and just saw some guy with glasses on, not moving.

This guy's got a dead body, No big deal.

Yes, it was crazy.

Is it true or false that before you crashed Josh at his most vulnerable moment, he told you to slow down because you're driving like a crazy person.

Yes, what say you?

Andrew?

Yes?

And then when I was paying attention and stopped driving recklessly, I got hit. Someone hit me.

So it's just people off like a jack ass to get hit.

I did not. I was, if anything, I was riding in the right lane, going nice and slow for the rest of it because I'm like, okay, you're right.

Is you get hit changing lanes?

No? The other person just I was getting off at the exit and somebody decided.

Your left bumper okay.

Yeah, and someone rammed into my car.

Also, though, that mountain that you hit did not.

Move at all, I did feel really bad because you were doing something nice like that is like an example of you being nice. You you were there for me when I needed it. So there you go, until you weren't.

I would like everything in that story to be cut except for that heart and also the end of that.

Okay, okay, cool, if you could do that. Wait, so the mountain part I have to take out.

Yeah, I would like that.

Did you the mountain a mountain?

I don't care.

Yeah, I don't care.

That was a thirty foot RV. I did not sign up for that. I was put into that position. And you too, could not drive that for at all.

I drove that thing. You looked like a child, what I looked like? Floor that you were in with your feet above the pedals like wait, I was standing out a booster seat. I was standing up save at all.

That can't help if you fell safe or not. I didn't car to do a mountain, That's all I know.

And when crashed I clipped it. I clipped the mountain clipped whatever it was. That's exaggerating.

All I remember hearing and feeling was a that was it.

Yeah, and guess what, you're still here to tell the tale.

So you're right, we did not die. Go ahead, go ahead, diamond?

Yeah, reach still.

Was he use guy?

I don't know?

Okay, nope, I almost said something that would have gotten me canceled. So absolutely not.

You think that there are things that can get people canceled in the year twenty.

Twenty five, I don't know.

Just in case, have you seen our politicians, Well they're group texting about war.

You think I could get in on that group text? I love a group text.

Andrew Wood's side chat that group text? Can you believe he's the American flagmag more plans?

That's a little it's not great.

I have a question about that.

If you were accidentally put in a group chat, would you let them know that you were in it that one?

Yeah, absolutely not.

No.

I would just ride it out and I would be breaking stories left and right. Hey, they're planning on doing this, motherfuckers, like you.

Know, because now it's never gonna happen again. Now before they make that group chat, they're gonna be extra careful about it. Yeah, yeah, I wouldn't have told you there.

Like why would you tell?

What would you tell?

Because he was like, ha ha, I have a story. Now everybody knows this guy's name.

True not smart not smart home.

Isn't he a journalist?

Yeah?

Well the news just came to him, right, But he didn't.

He didn't put like they were talking about it in the group chat, and he said nothing and did nothing until hours later when the news broke that they were doing stuff out in Yemen. So it's like, you sat on it.

You might as well sit on it, wait until the next time. Now that you know you're actually in this chat, then.

Break the story yourself.

And as a journalist, you don't have to reveal your sources, right, You're not supposed to. If you don't, you don't want to. So he could have just said sources told me and protected him out and never ever acknowledged like I am my source. Easy what I was in aught. I've told you this before. I was in a group chat once with a guy that I was dating's friends, like all of his friends, because we were throwing a surprise party for him, and they went to talk to each other about me because I posted a picture with Bernie Sanders and they were all like crazy people and they're like, oh she's a socialist, Oh my god, shed with Bernie? What the fuck is going on? They were talking all kinds of shit. I let it go for the whole day with them going back and forth, and I just slid in at the very end with a black moonface silence. There was not a word. I should text that group chat now, ok Hey, what do you guys doing?

You should send a sunrise EMOCHI.

I should send a hay, are you really happy about Trump?

Yeah?

You can't be right now, you can't be.

Okay.

I feel like you have to go get your haircut two hours away.

It's forty five minutes.

Started an hour and a half. Then you said it was an hour, and now you're saying it's forty five.

It's mine And this isn't an easy area to drive around.

It were just.

New Jersey has a million highways. Like it's stressed. That's not necessary when literally I go to a great barbera block from you, like you could just walk there, get your hair cut and walk home.

I want to support a local business owner.

This is not performative it's not even local for you, So you're driving to Allentown.

Meanwhile, all the Jersey City barbers are starving to death. Have you ever thought about that?

Yeah, starving to death?

To death?

Oh wow?

Okay, Jersey City is very impoverished. Wow, especially where you live.

Okay, yeah, put that one out there. Devora in norm Viille. But you liked her, I do. I don't. It's like Walter Kronkite. I mean, I yeah, I mean, I don't think I have any real feelings towards Walter Cronkite.

But are you just filled them?

Great host who wants to be a millionaire? Right?

Anyway, we need to get out of here, because Josh was nice enough to join us, and I wish you would join us more, Josh. Yeah, because you bring out quite the side of Andrew that is enjoyable. And I hope our listeners have gotten to know you nicely today.

Yeah, they think I have a weird thing with animals.

You do.

I'm performative, nice in the best like great episode guys.

They are also generous and you're fun and you're funny, and you're a good friend and a good listener and you have really pretty curly hair.

Shoot say that again.

You make fun of people really well, but never do their face.

Oh but.

Devious, I think I do. If it's asked for, then I will do Diamond. I don't really have one of Diamond.

See that's what people say when they do a really meant impression of you behind.

No, it's actually they're both hilarious.

And I genuinely don't have one for any of you. Three.

You don't have one for Josh.

You did Josh like three times. He wasn't even in here.

Yeah, but that's like, I don't think that's mean yours. I would.

Oh, so you do have some.

I don't know if I do like Josh. I feel like it's the one that everybody goes for. Wh's just like.

Josh's scream is my favorite thing. Okay, where can they find you online? Josh? If somebody wants to find you.

Don't find me online? Please.

You don't want people to follow you.

Andrew really pushed to become an influencer.

Oh well he is, and now I'm.

Going to Disney Parks yeah, and talking about my favorite places to go. Just kidding. I'm not hate that.

Continue do you won't want people to find you?

Well?

They don't have to social media.

Coaster Boy, Josh, coaster Boy, Josh, Andrew, Andrew Pug. Did you are you still at your ten thousand followers.

Ten point four?

Baby?

Oh wow? I guess you could say like that blue check marks come in soon.

I don't think I've gained a follower in like a year and a half. I know, I'm pretty sure I'm shadow band everywhere. What can you do? Diamond? Where can they find you at?

Diamond? Sincere on Instagram and add an underscore on Twitter?

And I'm at Baby Hot Sauce. But if you're listening to this, you've already decided if you're going to follow me or not follow me. But I'll take it if you're not following, Okay, say bye everybody until next time. Bye. No, don't say by yet, like follow, subscribe.

And read review to you.

Yes, unless you're the guy that thinks a racist that one person who left us a one star.

Don't do that, please don't. But I mean, but that does I feel like if you have like a four point three rating that's like controversial, Like why do people dislike it? Like I'd click on something that like that because they'd be like whoo why is it happening. Don't anyway, I'm not saying to give us sorry.

Yeah, okay, now say bye everybody.

Bye,

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Sauce On The Side With Gandhi

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