Poog with Kate Berlant and Jacqueline NovakThe hags deliver you a morning Poog. Colonics are the primary concern. Jacqueline had one. Kate wants one. Can they get one together? Early surgery and the romance of dying on the table, any table. Being awake while under anesthesia. The importance of Astral Projection. Pre-biotics, pro-biotics, leaky gut and extinction events. Glyphosate and Round Up causing our cells to forget their identity. Lingering in the the hypnogogic phase for creative gains.
Hi, I'm kp er Lance, I'm Jacqueline Novak. And this is poog, an ongoing conversation about wellness between two obsessive, fresh.
Two untamable intellects. This is our hobby, This is our hell.
This is our naked desire for free products. This is poog. Today's topics, loosely speaking, got health death by bus Kubla Khan. Well, by the way, I know, not always going to say morning poog, but this is actually the earliest morning poog.
Well A true, a true, Yeah, this is probably the biggest morning poog experience for me. I did one of my classics of like, I had ten alarms set, you know, every eight minutes in the last hour.
To make sure.
And then I got into the shower, not in it, but on its edge. I sit there, runs on my feet, it burns my feet, the steam warms me, and I drink my coffee in there, huddled against the wall of the shower. Like it's this thing of enacting the horror of being awake and the feeling it helps me to wake up into the world as a cold, cold experience, even here in sunny La Wow.
Well, I woke up. Hey on, let me think care. I'm a little bit brain dead today. Oh, it'll be fine, it'll be fine. I haven't washed my hair in I guess I washed it on Saturday. Now it's Tuesday, it's Wednesday.
Oh no, that's nothing. That's totally like, don't you know?
Tell me? I know that. But my hair becomes you can't imagine the rats nest in the back, and it's so and I was somewhere people were smoking cigarettes, and so I have this like cigarettes rats nest. I mean, it's disgusting the fact that I got into my bed with that head.
But cigarettes in the hair is so specific and such a feeling of like it's a little glamorous to.
Like totally totally you know, have.
Cigarettes smoke trapped in your rat's nest.
No, absolutely glamour waking up a corne or whatever. Like a chorus girl in the nineteen twenties, I saw you just using your compact, your Westman Utilier, a compact, a bit of color.
And because I don't have a stitch on, and I like, I feel like I really look and feel particularly haggard this morning. And my plan was like, after we do this. I haven't done any physical exercise in a week at least, and so I was thinking I would do that after poog and then wash my hair. And this is when we get into how you know it takes four hours to work out. My entire day now focused around the hair, washing of the hair post workout. Also, I won't even sweat doing low impact floor pilates. Not a bead will form. Not a bead. And sweating, I'm now, you know, there's a lot of talk detox right, shedding the toxins right, and then I hear people say that's completely fake, it's bullshit. Your body does that like you're not doing you know, but the sweating thing is real, and I'm now, of course terrified. I think I'm finally ready to get a colonic. I think I've done the emotional work. Are you scared?
Not at all. I'm excited to have the conversation I've tons to out.
Okay, Okay, I thought I got scared. And so I've always been scared because I've inherited that fear for my mother among her other fears and her kind of being like yeah, yeah, I mean like it washes out the good bacteria are also just like it seems scary, and I've always been scared that if I were to get a klonic, it would like rupture my in testin I die on the table, right, I always go straight to death on the table. And so I'm trying.
To do so fabulous well, because.
I'm convinced I have like Thanksgiving dinner from two thousand and nine, I've lodged in my upper intestine, like it's all and you know, all this talk about the poison and the air and the water and the food. You know, even if you eat organic, even if you eat organic, even if you eat organic food, the toxins are in the water. That it's like it's over right, So.
You know, we'll talk about it during actually glad to say yeah.
But so I'm now like, okay, I need the klonic, you know, maybe once a year for the rest of my life. But it's okay. Thoughts so many one. I had a huge no no, no, go you got yeah one.
Dying on the table is so.
Fabulous.
Again, it's the only way.
To say, I mean, imagine dying during early surgery, like during experience, like when they were pioneers, such as The NICK, my favorite, my favorite program, Okay, The.
NICK was sensational.
The renegade surgeon, but just generally the concept of dying on a metal table in that way screaming while they you know, try to tie your you know, your intestine work together.
You're not even screaming. I think it's worse than not screaming. It's just being you're knocked out. You don't even know you're dying.
Well, the true, the true death on the table.
And we might have to return to this because because I'll forget, but but we should talk about near death experiences on the operating table because that's probably my favorite subject. But let's let's go there, because talk about not knowing you're dying, you're walking down the hallway of the room.
But wait, take me back, okay, are you ready?
One?
Yeah, your fear of rupturing is by virtue of what material like the chronic hose.
Yeah, just some fear. By the way, this is already so healing or helping me face the fear because it's like it's not gonna happen. But yeah, I fear me because I'm calm. I fear that the water will the water it's somehow shoot the Yeah, the sheer force of the water or there's something wrong with me. Where like, you know, some issue that I have lurking in there will become dislodged, right exposed.
Well, a couple of things. One, it's not a hose down. Oh yeah, okay, it's not a pressure wash.
It's not just my pronunciation today. Did you hear that? Oh yeah, maybe.
Maybe because you're so close to sleep and you were just dreaming of another lifetime okay where you had that accent.
Oh god, don't you wish to it wouldbe.
One of those people that gets knocked on ahead and wakes up speaking another language.
Imagine, imagine the indignity off the fact that I don't thought that's never happened to me when I want it so badly, much like a streak of traumatized white hair.
You know that, what's that?
You know there was a boy who got into an accident and couldn't come to school.
But when you know that song.
You're not you're not referencing anything.
I can pull it up to my head.
But anyway, it's it's the shock of you know, when they get the shock of white hair. Of course, trauma wake up in the morning the day after the birds flew through the window and okay, so anyways, just Ania di Franco.
I don't know.
Yeah, no, that was just me speaking. You thought I was working the lyrics again, Oh no, earlier it was. But I can't pull the name of that that song.
Maybe data can't. I just have to know now not of course you're not interested.
You're never interested.
If I bring up a song you don't know, of course you wouldn't be. It's fair.
My literacy with musicals is.
Once again, not a musical. This is hysterical.
Okay, it's merely a song from like ninety six. But it's a song that I will Sendulater and we'll discuss it ter on food because it's really it's interesting, all right.
So it's not a hose down right, okay, okay, right, got.
Pressure washing the walls like someone doing your roof, So that's not it's actually a slow filling.
Oh god, I'm gonna throw up. Really, okay, you saying slow filling, I mean that is enough to make me just talk about diet on the table. I just well, I mean bearing the lead. Sorry, skipping over a huge detail. Have you done it?
Yes?
More than once? No?
I mean classically, I got a three pack or whatever on life booker Okay, I'm not afraid to life go for a deal, even when when it's a minor surgery or whatever you want to call this. Okay, it's like literally life booker or whatever. You know what, what's that other one that whatever doesn't matter?
Thank you.
I think it was groupon in New York City. It was pretty sensational and exciting experience. My energy levels had plummeted, okay, and my abdomen was distended, you know, to regularly of course.
Being asked I from Praig and a constant story of my life. Remind me later maybe to tell you about the phone store man and what he said.
Okay.
So I opted to go to the woman's apartment, okay, because she had an option of like go downtown to the office, or she has a setup in her home, and the setup in her home was two blocks away. So I went to this high rise in the Upper West Side.
I went in.
The husband opens the door, he's saut teg back.
CHOI something being saute.
Probably about nine feet from the hallway bathroom. The hallway bathroom, okay, this was set up in the hallway bathroom. Okay.
So but it was cozy, okay, And I went in and I go like, yeah, my, you know, my stomach's really blowed in the season. I can't access that for some reason in my memory, it definitely wasn't the dead of winter, and I don't recall I'm picture maybe it was. I feel like it was summer. Feels like summer. So he's satan and he's kind of like cozy, and he's like she's the best, you know, like about like she's the best in the biz kind of thing about about his wife. And then I go into the little hall bathroom and there's like a folding table in the.
Yeah, and then there's.
Whatever is hooked up to the toilet, like a tank or something of the sink. And I get on the table and it's like you get in the fetal position.
Trow right.
I don't even remember dropping trout. It's interesting, but of course I was right. I mean, I have to be naked from the waist down.
I mean, I don't pulling the underwear aside situation.
To exactly.
Particularly like what the underwear is.
And I would argue it's like worse if like I feel like there's a certain type of woman that wears like, you know, the hanky pinky like like lace thong whatever.
Into the beauty treatments. And I'm like, I'm not that woman. You know. It's like a child's bagging a pair of Hanes or whatever occasionally. Yeah, So this is the key, okay.
And I talk about this in my book because it was partly and I just say that as the humiliation obviously of Jesus sorry in text.
But on the table, she's going up.
So I'm like ready for her to insert the tube, right, and she goes.
She goes, I'm push okay, she's a push.
Oh god, I'm gonna throw okay, push.
Push okay, And so I start flexing, I start bearing dice, are flexing my anus at her to open up the to open it up like a in my book, like a mute frog okay, and opening at her. And she's like push and I'm like, I I assume she means bear down to open it up for her, and so I'm just saying like I'm just croaking it at her, and she sees she's.
Looking at my butt.
Okay, she sees the movement and she's like, no, push it in. She has to grab my hand because she's trying to say, here, you insert it.
She's trying to hand me.
You have to do your own insertion. That seems.
Well, And so I was like, oh, it's like the humiliation of just croaking. My anis at her like a flower singing okay in silence. So something it was, I mean for someone to see that small movement, for someone to see that small.
Of a movement and there there, yeah, yeah, it was deeply in it.
So then you inserted. Wait a minute, you had you had to physically insert yourself. I went right there, what am I paying?
It's not going deep?
Well maybe no, it's it doesn't deep because again it's a filling move it up.
It must have been just picturing like a dry, dry plastic shoving into your asp. Well they opened the plastic of you know, oh this is your fresh tube Like yeah, yeah.
Believe.
You know what the problem is. You know what the problem is, Kate. We all now we all now have access to like home lamination or is this we all have systems now? They tell can put their vegetables in their own plastic wrap and seal the edges. Okay, so the technology it's no longer factory sealed. Yeah, we can no longer trust it. They rip open the plastic, scream excited. Yeah, factory sealed does not the promise you think it is. Okay, she goes down there.
I mean the amount of trace DNA from the Chump and Ade documentaries. Amount of trace DNA pair of the underpants from the factory.
Wait there, trace there's trace DNA is everywhere.
I think, Tracy is like impossible to not have.
Oh god, it's like inspected number four two six. It's like they're like they cough on your yes, oh my god, of course.
And you know, in some ways it's almost comforting. I always I was actually gonna say this, my nice about that artisan not full automation.
Yeah.
Like I saw toilet paper going by on a video about toilet paper production the other day, okay, and I saw it like literally couldn't remember the word I was gonna say, bales of toilet paper meaning the individuals not even and they're riding by and open air and the open air of the bactory.
Oh my god.
We're never protected like of course, like they're not sealed at every step.
It's not like the paper's created.
There's cough on there. Somebody coughs in the factory and open air. It's like there is something the erotics of capitalism. Even when we reached the heights of automation, the human human trace cannot be.
Flesh will not absolutely nature will find a way.
Yeah, labor inherently has sweat on it. Labor cannot be separated from the human body, right because what is what is?
Sorry?
Yeah, no, I'm really I'm.
Just following this because.
And also, I mean, you know, a huge question is despite you know, occasional factory visits of the school variety of Ben and Jerry's tour, Okay, I mean, can you imagine getting less, like less of a penetrating view of what factory work must be like then going to the Ben and Jerry's.
Factory, Yeah, exactly, and they're like they have like eight people grinning, like we get to make ice cream.
All day, yes, okay, and like giving you little samples and like whatever. There's just I guess what I'm saying is, who knows, uh, god, factory life. I've just realized I have a rich envisionment of factory life that is probably not accurate.
Oh yeah, we don't know what the hell is going on. So she puts it in.
She starts filling me up okay, okay, or I put it in. She's not a deep insertion, okay, okay, okay, anyway, it's just you know, okay, and then fill it starts start filling you. Okay.
So she flips the switch and the water starts flowing in. And it's not a pressure host feeling. Okay, it's just a.
You'll feel a bit of pressure, light pressure, fullness.
Yeah, yeah, truly woozy jack Nuts you're talking. I'm like gonna fall off my chair.
But I feel like this is the exposure you need for gonna go in.
No, I don't keep going because I'm surely getting dizzy. This is hysterical sliding down. It's not a favorite from frame.
I mean, I don't have to. I'm just keep going, keep going.
So it's filling up, and she goes, let me know when you need to release, okay, when the urge to expel comes on you, okay. And I'm like waiting and I'm wanting my money's worse. Do you understand? So I don't want pain is a classic. I don't want them to stop because I think I'm uncomfortable. Not I'm like last week with I was worried they're gonna pull off my lash gel early and I'm gonna have less good lash. So I'm like determined to grin and Barrett, but I'm actually feeling almost nothing. I mean it's slightly feeling, but I'm really not feeling anything. She's like waiting for me to be like, She's like, now, like, how you doing? Like, wow, oh you're good? Oh you know, because I'm letting it fill me up to the neck. Right the water's bubbling at my chin.
And shooting out your mouth and my shoulders are plumping okay, and I'm coughing it out and wine and red in the face, and she's just acting like I'm good.
So I'm like grinning and bearing it even further. And then I'm like, all right, it's getting a little tight here, balloon might burst and so yeah, yeah, so I release whatever and then it's just the water.
So what does she do? Pulls the hose out, so this is still what?
This is still via the hose, it shoots back in.
The shit goes through those Well it's.
Not just ship.
The water has to come out. I believe the water went back the other direction. God that sounds unsanitary.
But yeah, what right in when she hits release right into the reservoir, right.
Into the bock choy, literally the.
Bock choice, and honestly didn't even gross me out, Like it just didn't.
It was really honestly comforting.
The sounds of thee they're like, Okay, you know, the garlic, the onion in the pants, one of the greatest smells in the universe.
Yeah, that's all you need.
So God, I wonder if I'm misremembering this. But she flips the switch. You're still on the table, is my point? Right, Yeah, something has to come back out as far as I recall. And then and then I think she's like, get off, get on the toilet, okay.
And her home toilet, I mean Jesus. Yeah.
So I'm like, maybe it was like this, Maybe it was like do you need to go or something? And I was like not really, Like I was still fine. I hadn't triggered the peristalsis that are whatever?
And so it was like, by the way I'm intering acknowledged the thing, which is we're diving into the world of clomics without even once raising the question of what the benefit of doing it is. Do you know what I'm saying?
That's interesting like and I'm not even sure. I mean, there's a variety of promised benefits, but it's like it's not even about that. It's about like the experience for me, I wanted bloke to decrease. I want to digestion to improve. Okay, because the thing the idea, yeah, no, no, go, the idea to me was about because you talk about Thanksgiving dinner, you want to get you want to get even better detail. Sometimes you hear stories about like a cram from kindergarten coming out.
Now that's the ship that gets me hooked. Okay, that but yeah.
From the eighties, but from the eighties. Yeah, like my mother's jewelry just comes pouring out of me.
Yeah, that's the ship that gets me to sign up. Oh god, I think we got to go to break. There's so much on the horizon for us. Off you go.
Welcome home, boys, wellcome home home right now.
Hello. I'll wrap it up with the colonic. I'm trying to think, what is the key detail?
All right, I want to go more detail. I want to slow it down. All right, we'll pull from me what you want from me? What she goes what?
So there's something like do you need to get on the toil. I'm like, no, I'm still not.
Feeling anything really okay, And so then I think I go to the toilet and she leaves me to go chat with the husband while I go on and it's like nothing's really happening, or maybe a little bit whatever, but it's not like some major release. And so she comes back in. I'm like, all right, get back on the table. She's gonna fill me up again.
Okay. She fills me up again, and this time she sort of grabs this was what pressed.
Grabs her thighs, grabs my belly okay, like as if by the belly fat itself. Okay, but like a hard grip, like you're trying to get a basketball. And she starts shaking it, okay, shaking.
God, shake the stomach with the oh God.
Like I'm a jar of rows okay, to fill it up.
More, No, like jar rowse sauce. Okay, to clean it out, like there's a.
Little left in the thing sauce.
You fill it in the sink, you close it, you shake it up to get the loose or to loosen it.
So she's starts shaking my belly okay.
And then we start to get some you know, the cramps of parastalsis or whatever.
Okay, and.
No, I know what that that feels familiar. But what is that? Oh, you'll be reminded.
It's the it's the muscular the wave like muscular movements that draw food through the through the digestive track doub yeah, or rosophagush.
It massages it down. And so we got it going.
And what she said was you have a sluggish system, like if you shoot water up your ass, your body like should want to start booting it out, eject it, yeah, or start like paristalsis.
Mine just sat there like a bag.
Okay what happened to me?
And I'm like this is my issue, right, this is this is why I'm here. Okay. So it's almost like she gets it going.
It finally stimulates something. Okay, there's like the feelings and now it's like I'm like, go go whatever. I would never say that, it's I would never yell go go. But it's like it's more like me smiling like yeah, and her being like do you need to use the toilet? Me being like thank you, okay, you are leaving, and then me getting on the toilet and whatever release I guess, okay, but anyway, did it.
She's like, you know, come back. No.
What was devastating is I go, I'm here because I'm bloated. The guy at the phone store said I thought I was pregnant.
Whatever.
She's like, I could see.
You know, it's just the brutality of the practitioner or the esthetician or whatever acknowledging the problem that you're there to solve.
Like, oh, it's so scary. I got I had a facial and I was like, oh my god, my skin. Right, it's been over a year since I'm facial. It's really And she's like, yeah, you're really congested or something else, like bitch, yeah, how.
Do you feel about? Well you're here now. That's a big dentist like, I haven't been in a lot. Well you're here now, that's the important thing.
My dentist, I just want to quickly brag. Was like I can tell you've really been fossing. Wow, And I just want to say that I know. No, this is actually quick just to pivot to my dentist because I talked about him on poog and when I went I went into the office, receptionist goes, hi, Kate. She goes. We've been seeing a lot of your friends. Literally, Hi, k I'm a celebrity at the dentist office, Luccio Kim Here in Glendale, they meant poo listeners, Yes, the pooh listeners. And this dentist, Luccio, such a class act. If you refer ye someone to him, he sends you a five dollars Starbucks gift card. Honey, they're stacking up and I got and at first I got, I would get, I would get them in the mail. Oh, thanks for referring. You know, it would be the name of a friend who I remember referencing. But now I'm getting you know, thanks for referencing Sean, And I'm like, Sean, you know, I'm serious. Yeah yeah, so so me stows on me pooh yeah yeah, I know.
I cannot the leap.
Well, I'm shocked whenever you mentioned by name, because I'm like, you know, other people seeking appointments.
You know, that's the competition, right, They're gonna get your time slot. So it's very bold the way you share your practitioner names.
Oh wow, you have but a dentist you know, every six months ago, I want to I want to go three times a year to get the full cleaning. Yeah, well sorry, we went off. We went off. We have way more to go about clonic.
Right, so has my tell me everything?
Okay, so I'm now by the way, of course, as you can knowing me. My first thought, can we go together? Right immediately? I know what. We can't be side by side on the table, although I would, but I just want to I just I'm just gonna ask you straight. Don't you want to get one? Do you have interests?
Of course you do?
You want to get back on the table, Okay, I want to get I heard about somebody I was, I was somebody recommended. Somebody said she's really mean.
Which perfect, that's what I want.
They were like, she's really good, but she's really she's mean and like kind of angry.
That's a dream, that's the dream. That's what you want to see.
I kind of feel like I really want someone to like lovingly like scrape you out. That's now lovingly yeah, and put the hose.
In want like soft, gentle eyes looking at me like really, yeah, I don't want like someone bitting my hair, like.
No, it makes you brave. Maybe I need someone a little brusque. Yeah, who's gonna like make me brave. Who's gonna be like sit recently? Who's yeah, someone may be brave?
Oh I know what it was? Who?
No, it was just you talked about someone saying like, you know, you need to be with your language and that like that like booting you.
That's cool, I'm a brilliant therapist. Was it was like, I don't know what you're saying. You do more specific with your language. We have to have agreed upon meaning here, because a word that you say could mean something completely different. Like I was like, oh, you know, it's deep postmodern therapy, right, just like language, like it's language.
No, right, and she is trying to bring you back to modern language.
I guess right. Also, it is a brilliant thing of like so much guests lost in conversation because we don't have agreed upon meaning truly, like this idea that like we're all running around with like the words meaning the same thing. It's like ridiculous. Yeah, shared meaning since when?
Since when?
Good luck?
Sweet?
So it's like, good luck having a conversation in your goddamn life, let alone, let alone an emotional conversation or trying to express yourself or receive someone else's emotional reality. It's work, kids, It's work. Okay, So back to Kolonix. I'm now desperate for it, wanted now. And so my friend the thing that really got me excited is that my friend went and said that then for like months afterwards, she was excuse my French shitting like a rock star.
I remember that, just like you know, you shared that with me, and I was like, oh, you know what, I by the way, you're gonna love this.
Yeah, maybe you know I've been talking about since the eighties, you know, my constipation. Yeah, maybe I'm not constipated. Maybe what I'm striving for is like Mariah Carey level. I don't know, like like maybe I'm actually maybe I'm fine.
You know, you just mean rock star. You just you're trying to say, like.
I don't know Maria carry level shits. Yeah, yeah, I don't know. Continuing the sort of I just.
You realize maybe a false expectation I.
Want to excel shitting because I've heard, you know, people go, oh, well here's what you want. You want three times a day, twice a day to have soft serf, right, you want like the snake, you want the like smooth like twice a day, right, and I'm like, well, who's doing that? So are you telling you're having a soft served snake? Sorry?
When things are right? Yeah, and I hate talking about shit, but yeah, I me.
Too, and I feel immediately embarrassed. I'm like, oh my god, like there are hot people listening, but like I.
I don't know.
Well, the question is what's more attractive ultimately, right, because it's like the more monstrous, okay, the more more you know, the soft serve okay, the whatever winding whatever it is, right, the more monstrous and theory, like would be a grocer okay, But honestly, if you had to walk into a lover's toilet okay, and their shit didn't go down, right, would you rather see like a smooth pellets thing or would you see would you rather see like a bunch of pellet rocks, like smashed together, like in the Horrible Suitcase of.
Farious you know what I mean?
You know I'm talking about you. Ever, I'm so horrifying. I remember once accidentally seeing a lover's ball and it was like, actually, I was immediately fine, Yeah, I felt fine to hones, Why am I trying to? I'm trying to And I was never the same and I was like, it actually did nothing, like the dials didn't move. I'm an adult, okay, No, but I have I mean, oh my god, I find shit less offensive than gas.
And not just because you know, one one is sent into the toilet and one into the air.
Yeah, no, I haven't.
It's not just I happen to believe that gas should be sent into the toilet and that's the only perfect place for its release. I can't believe you should it should be shot into.
The bowl directly into the center land.
It's it's air, so it's not gonna I mean, if molecules must be denser and regular air, so in theory, it should sink toilet word, I really I hate talking ship but they just like so much.
But it's healing. It's healing to do it. It's healing to do it, I think. But I've I've in this situation and like a lover proximity to a lover situation, held it for days three days? Is my is my gas?
Uh? No?
Sweetheart? The full intila No.
Well, I know I've said this before you probably a thousand times because it's the most suffering image. But the disturbing concept that your body has to hydrate fecal matter, Okay, so it doesn't turn into a rock at your belly. So basically like shit is like dehydrating you because it's like your body keeps flooded, like flooding water, and to keep it soft, so like you're watering your shit. No, it's disgusting though, because it's like it's like you're carrying. It's like either get it out or care for it for the rest of your life internally, not care for a week.
Okay.
Part of your hydration is going to keep that thing soft.
What Yeah, and so you're doing.
Oh god, I just can't believe we're embodied and that it's just it's so shocking when you think about I mean blood, blood alone, right, and then the organs, the intent, all of it, and then on top of it shit. I mean, it's just I need a colonic. I'm going in June. Whether you like it or not, let's go in June.
I just now I have my dream for the colonic again, it just doesn't exist, but would be us lying in two chambers.
But there's a small I could do it drunk. Although I think that Tims, I think that's like a depressant to the system.
No, you don't want that. Alcohol is poison, but you don't want that.
If, if anything, you want caffeinated peristalsis. Do you see what I'm saying, caffeine Well, like you know, caffeine gets the paristalsis going.
Oh don't I know it all? Yeah?
Wait, wait what we were just saying?
Wait, Oh, my dream for the colodic is you and me in separate chambers. But there's a small window, a small door near just our faces. Again, you can open that door and so we can see each of these faces. We're obscured.
I want that so bad, a little door with a window. Yes, so just so I could just see. I just want your eyes, like your sweet little face poking through. And then but what's the audio though?
Shit, interesting question.
I think I think headphones so that we can just be we record a podcast, essentially the audio is in the headphones. Also, then I don't have to hear the sound of whatever the tube is making and all of that.
It was absolutely silent, as I recall, it was absolutely silent.
The imagery of the Colonic for me is in is it? Oh my god? What's the movie with Steve Martin and Sara Jisica Parker, she has she talks about getting a colonic and she's like her tiny little body and she's like, oh, it's wonderful, and she's like six her arms in the air and she's like this little well her.
Like ballet body.
Yeah, because she was, you know, famous for sort of keeping toned via ballet based workouts.
Really is that her secret always.
Always, that was always the thing, like it was always with her.
She has one of those bodies whom like she didn't even have to work for it. It just feels like, you know what I mean, It just feels like that just is her. She just is tendon.
Yeah, yeah, it's very tending.
She already just is that she has Like as you know, we're watching Sex in the City and I truly we're moving on. I just was gonna say, there's this one episode where she's wearing this dress and her ass is like so incredible that sent me into a depression permanently never to return yet, like it was she like dark gray dress. She's leaving, I'll tell you right now, episode shortcoming, season two. She's leaving. The famous thing of Justin Thurrow plays two different characters on the same show. He plays one character in season one and then return season two to play different character. So shocking they needed him that bad? We got, we got. It's Justin. It's Justin. I mean it's unimaginable. It's unimaginable bringing him in to play different characters. I mean, maybe it was is that not shocking?
Maybe someone fell out and he had to love that.
I love that.
Maybe they're like Justin, They're like, see that's like when I would be like, I mean, what is this? This is no different than if we were a theater troup of actors in the thirteen hundreds, you know, like we play all the characters.
I'd go there.
Sorry, I got distracted because I was thinking like if that was like I was imagining Sex and the City, but all the characters just play each other. Like that's useless. It's a useless you know idea.
I don't find it useless at all.
I thank you.
I appreciate that.
Whenever she's wearing this dress, she's the final scene of the episode, and her ass is insane, and it was like really captivated me.
Yeah, interesting, you're you really are consumed. It continues to come up with you.
I hear it in my head. All the time.
You going in my head, you going I want a new ass by Thursday or whatever. You're always like a new ass. It's like your callie accent or something. Oh wait, what was I gonna say about Colonix? Oh fuck, I don't know.
I lost it.
There was something about you in California. I don't know whatever it was there.
What do you think?
Are you impressed that I got a group on one? Because I am is impressed?
The word I would use.
Yeah, I was walking down the street. I was walking down the street and I saw this place I walked by and it was like Colonics. It was just like Coloonax, like as Good in Front and Chris and and I'm like, oh my god, look like right in the neighborhood, you know, like that kind of thing.
Yeah.
Why though, Like, why do I inherently fear the strip.
Mall Colonic shop?
Right?
Why Why do I believe I know that it's inherently dirty or bad?
I remember hearing once that the Chlonic you want is the gravity one that a lot of times it's kind of like fancy places. It's like the ship's like running horizontal, and that you actually want it to be the mark of like a truly good colonic or serious colonicists, or whatever the hell you call them is. It's like gravitational, so it's up. It's like the bag is up. Now you're laying down still, but the water is going is pouring downwards.
The water pouring out of you.
It's pouring downwards again. I have as usual. I just know that I was watching. I just know look for verticality. Okay, okay, speaking of verticality and the bowl, somebody has to peep.
All right, I think we can go to a break. We can go to a break on this Kick Us Intact three pretty soon.
Okay, Yeah, it's friends.
All right, welcome back, welcome back. We mentioned glco's fate. Okay, I was radically. I can't get it right.
What is it like liphos sate life, lipphostate?
But I was radical around it. It's a word glyphosate, glyphos. Yeah, okay, I find my way.
I'll just you know, Kate has been talking about it for years, okay, that she won't eat what was the food?
You wouldn't eat a piece of broccoli?
I think oats. Well, Glyphasate is very present in a lot of conventional oats. I don't care your organic oats. Gotta hell the glyphosate and them is through the roof and what is gate and so glyphos is uh okay, So so round up it's like the chemical used in round.
Up, I believe round up or whatever.
Exactly exactly, which is like a proven carcinogen and a super toxic and an absolute nightmare. And so yeah, you can test glyphosate levels and it's like a legal amount of glyphosate, but really don't want any of it. And it's going through.
The roof, kid, and save you organic ca Yeah, argonic can save you. And this week the glyphos sate really hit me because I watched this video. A big extinction event is coming because of it.
But don't worry, humanity.
We'll pick up again and adapt and stop with this bad farming practices. But it's like, yeah, we're we're we're all kind of fucked. But also it's this whole thing that I when I do this, when I don't get into it fully, it's it's even more boring than getting into a fully.
So I'm not gonna get into pulling out.
We'll talk about near the experiences on the table experiences on the table. Yeah, and I'm gonna tell you the phone the phone store thing. The guy who said the phone store. Now, okay, you ready, so so think about it. Go into the phone store. I'm wearing a classic pregnant tip off the Empire waste style dress, sleeveless summer denim, so it's kind of you know, bandoh top, and then it's flowing free down below. And and I go into the store to return the energy healer boss I was working for at the time that you've worked for as well, and Nita to return her phone and the guy, the guy, I was like, oh, sorry, yeah, I don't have that number, and he did something really gross and misogynist first of all, and he goes, he goes, oh, you can blame it. I'm being pregnant, like basically blame your fuzzy mind.
Oh my god, blame it.
I'm being pregnant, which is its own insult. First of all, He's like, and then and I just like, I am not pregnant, okay, And then oh no, no, no, are you ready what he said? So I'm not just say I'm gonna let's play out the scene for fun. Okay, Okay, Well, blame it. I'm being pregnant.
I guess I'm not pregnant.
It's not a bad thing.
Oh he was, he was. He was spiraling.
Spiraling is not not deranged.
He was spiraling almost like pregnant women are beautiful or like or like to carry a baby as an honor.
It makes no sense. He didn't know what to do. He didn't know what to do.
It's just I'd never understand if, like, why anyone comments on anyone's body ever on the cover, but why why who reacts out loud or allowed?
It's out loud to me, you know what I mean?
Sort of like buck naked or no butt naked as a kid like butt naked? Yah, yeah yeah, and then you like find out it's buck naked, which is a meaningless term like in modern society, and yet.
We're freaking to use it.
So anyway, that was something. Are you familiar with near death experiences?
Two things?
Oh, I actually don't want to tell you. Well, I don't want to tell you. I just realized something that'll terrify you. I'm sure you've heard of it, and it'll make you never want to get surgery.
And I'm so I'm actually wondering if I shouldn't tell you.
I mean, I'm going to just go go. We know it's coming.
You probably already know about this. Are you familiar with the thing, this horrifying thing I ever saw?
Oh no, okay, so there's a thing.
You've probably heard of it where they put you out for a surgery and you appear to be out, but you're not.
Stop. Okay, let's I'll stop you right there to say, I'll never forget this. I had once heard of an adult This is actually I'm glad this isn't memory coming up. I'm at a dinner party, orm at some party. I'm young, like you know, ten, and I'm listening to this woman talking recount her recent knee surgery. They put her out. She came to, felt nothing, but could feel her entire body quaking as they with a you know, with a hammer basically go to her knee, and she was just aware that the surgery was happening, and she was completely conscious.
Painless, painless, thank god, but painless.
But unable to speak, and felt her whole body ricocheting under the force of the hammer. It's never the same and as somebody who has had sleep paralysis, right It's like I've known what it feels like. I have been in a state where I'm completely unable to move, but I'm aware that I'm, you know, there in my body. But can't you know, trying to scream? Scream, scream, can't, trying to move, can't. So I've been there. Okay, it's hell, Well, it's truly hell.
Justes go even worse. I'm pretty sure that the particular syndrome I'm talking about, you feel the pain.
Oh Jesus Jack, so you're fully experiencing it.
You merely can't move, scream or alert them that that you're there.
So you're trapped in your body screaming to the heavens.
Now. The good news is, this is how I and I watched a movie about this. I'll have to find it figure out what it was. But the good news is, and this is what I take comfort in.
This is the reason I like to try to ask or project at night.
Okay, what I.
Want to learn how to leave my body so that in such a situation I want to pop out immediately. Okay, so the body is I'm experiencing, you know, massive trauma via surgery.
I want to leap amy, where.
Are you strolling down the hallway, listening in on the conversation area. I mean, this, this is this is almost like it couldn't be more.
Well, document good news, You're like, the good news is what you can ask you project out?
Is that? I think that in that level of pain, I think you'll slip out of your body.
Yeah, yeah, totally.
Essentially pass out inside of the prison of the past doubt.
But I'm like, can't want to the brainwaves people, Actually I can't remember if the brain waves are visibly firing. Yeah, like like no one's looking at it, like in the movie, like like the monitors behind and the brain waves are going crazy as they're screaming internally. Is that not the most hideous god thing you've ever met?
What is that? Botched? Anesthesia? What is it?
Botched? Always makes me laugh?
I hope Bosch is a great one.
I'm not sure. I mean it's it must be, because you know, aren't they sort of depressing different elements of the nervous system?
Also, what the fuck is anesthesia? No clue? Like, what is that? Have you ever gotten? I got it once for my wisdom teeth and I just remember getting into the chair. I started laughing manically really nervous because I was going under and I was like couldn't stop laughing, and they're like, oh, okay, you know, count down ten, nine out.
You know, Like this is that indignity that our bodies are capable, that our consciousness is capable of just being turned off like that.
I just I know, splip a switch and you're gone.
Yeah, I mean, I think it's weird that sleep even does that, Like, I like really embarrassing that the body, over the course of the day literally cannot maintain Like that's crazy that we can't survive without sleep, Like I know, like our body like will fall to the ground.
I remember one time, like I was on this school trip and I'd stayed up all night and like I'd like hide the fact that I had been up all night and I was so tired that we were walking along on my knees were buckling in the street, okay literally, and then.
We were in a warm museum with the other classmates. I was between two friends, Like my knees.
Get buckling going down.
It's cute and like the body can't you know what I mean, Like.
Oh, sleep is it is very sci fi. It's like sleep is and don't want to get me started on the fact that we dreamed during it. I mean, it's just absolutely insane. No one knows what the hell's going on.
I remember watching this video to Science Museum about like I was eight, and it was like it was like the brain's the final frontier and all that kind of stuff.
And it really just love language about it. I love when things are called the final frontier.
That excites you.
It excites me, like it's like or the last taboo is another one that excites me, Like someone being like.
Like, gut health is the last taboo? Yeah, well, gut health.
By the way, if we don't get serious about it now.
I'm joking, obviously, get health is I know.
If we don't get serious about gut health now we're not.
We won't get serious about it.
We have to care, and is it people don't care?
I care, and I'm scared. Hence the probibiotics.
Oh no, I get so well buying them, and I.
Took you know, I was on the Seed wave, you know when Seed came out eighteen thousand years ago. No, I was there. What's that It's like this expensive probiotic brand, oh Seed, And I was you know, did it, and then of course there were like no changes or like no noticeable difference, So I stopped, even though it's not the goal, Like noticeable difference isn't necessarily the goal, I guess, but I stopped, and probiotics were one of those things that me daily.
Well, probiotics, prebiotics. I saw some probiotics. You know, the whole question of Okay, now we got to load with pre. The ways you can go wrong, the ways you.
Can go wrong. Apparently an unripe banana loaded with it with what pre or both with pre, with pre, okay with pre, and then super ripe is pro.
Okay, So we follow up followed by yeah, one after the next. I mean, there's other ways to get prebiotics, which I think isn't probiotics, just like fiber or something.
I don't. It's a mess.
And but here's the reason that I'm motivated, because I see the digestive system I know, like or like keeping things running. I'm like, in my mind, we can come back from that. But the devastation about why we have to heal the gut microbirom, as far as I can tell, is has to.
Do like leaky gut, leaky gut syndrome.
Leaky gut syndrome is like minor perforations in the digesterois track and it leaks the talk like leaks your shit into your blood.
And then is that what it is?
Speaking with authority?
I don't think it's that you leak your shit in your Isn't it that nutrients s don't.
That's a different thing. That's not leaky gut.
That's the lining of the intestine is covered with crans from kindergarten, okay, and so it's like there's nothing it can't digest it.
But leaky gut is literally and this.
Is the thing that this week with the glyphos fate okay, glyphas state, is that these micro spaces in these structures the blood blain geez louise in the blood brain.
That wasn't even a fake one. The second one, you know, you know, it's a pet peeve of mine.
The whole like someone misspeaks and I'm like, I really prefer to just hear the little flip and the word. I don't need this performing.
I can't talk. Yeah, it's the worst. My god, buzz, people are so fraugulate. What are we talking about? Oh?
So blood brain barrier, gut leaky and then like some other ones, they're all everything's leaking, okay, and the chemical is coursing through us. And what this guy said and we'll find that, I'll find the source text is that our cells are forgetting their self identity.
Oh Christ, like it's actually rewiring.
Where autoimmune comes in.
It's it's oh, this isn't my body, This isn't not my body.
So scary. God, that's so that's so scary.
But what is the key? What is the thing? What? What is it?
I mean also die joyously, right, like, soak me in chemicals and take me out.
Who cares?
Right? I mean, wait, that's not true. I forgot about other people. I forgot about other people.
I was testing out the concept okay of who cares. I'm like, oh, right, right right, But these like globally fuck everyone. Not everyone wants to just die with a martini in their hands.
Not an option for all.
Yeah, this is when I get. When I spiral into you know, water, water, water, you know, it's like anything just the talk, no, no, just the toxin. It's like, oh, it's like the poisons in the water, the poisons in the air, the poisons in the rain, the porters, the poisons of them, like the song in the air, the poisons in the rain, the port is in the food, and the ports.
In the rain, the poasons in the rain.
And then like if we can't do anything about it, will all die Martinian hands.
Yeah, and they are personal narrative. Yeah, yeah, so do the goddamn shuffle because it's over soon anyway. Yeah, that's why it's like I'm not a survivalist, like right, Like, yes, I want to optimize, but not so much that I like waste, Like I don't want to waste my time optimizing them to get to die. Buy coconut to the head, right, It's like like that's the ultimate kind of horror, would be like over emphasis on health and food purity and then you get you're taken out by a bus. Right, So yeah, it's kind of like don't go too crazy because you're almost begging the universe to take you out the old fashion the gods.
You're tempting the gods with your hubris. Okay, you're probiotic hubris. You're just asking to have an anvil fall. But then you know that becomes it's some crazy superstition right where It's almost like when someone's like says they won't quit smoking or whatever because they could get And by the way, this is another pet peeve of mind.
It's always hit by a bus tomorrow, every time, right right, right, Okay, you get hit by a bus tomorrow, Oka keep smoking. It's always hit by a bus tomorrow.
And it's like, first of all, like they're acting like they're facing the reality of the fact they could die any time, but they still put it off to tomorrow. Do you see it's too harsh. They can't say I could.
Be hit by a bus, or they don't say I could have an.
Aneurysm right now, right right now.
It's always I could have an aneurysm tomorrow, you know, right right yeah. The bus is like really big for people. And then it's.
Almost like they're rooting for their own death by bus because that would legitimize the cigarette smoking. It's like they're hoping to die, not of the cigarettes. To make the point that it was a great choice all along.
So I was getting lost thinking about in aneurysms. Aneurysms, as you know, always top of the list for me, top of the list. Also an adult to let me know, I remember being on my friend's house and her parent being like, oh, so and so I had aneurysm out of nowhere, just died right there at the kitchen table or whatever. And I was like, Okay, well, I'll never recover from this, so thank you.
The fear, though, I'm like that to me is like kind of like being hit on the have with a coconut. Well, actually no, because I actually feel like you can avoid the coconut a little better if you keep your wits about you or wear a strong SPA advisor.
Okay, some saying no, you can protect coca to the head, though, to me is kind of romantic because in it I'm imagining, you know, oh, you're you're having a beautiful afternoon on the beach. Coconut hits you here, it's over.
How do you feel about afternoon? The sensation of afternoon?
Afternoon? Afternoon once again be obviously deeply depressing and terrifying. Thank you. The liminal space between sleeps, you know, like not yet asleep, you're fully awake.
The afternoon of the day, right, the hypnagogic the hypnogogic state of the day. Ooh, you know that's that place where he wrote Kubla Khan. Whoever wrote Kubla Khan, I always forget Coleridge, Coleridge, Coleridge in every I have no clue.
But in every book I read on creative practices referenced, they love to talk about him writing Kubla Khan in the dream state.
Oh wait, don't love this. This is another one.
I read some of these guys around this time. So they would try to get into the hypnagogic gauge it whatever state, and to write and to have visions and whatever. And so they what someone what they would do is they would like relax. They put they balance a spoon on their hand, okay, and beneath the spoon was a pot on the ground or something, and they dropped the spoon because they're actually truly falling asleep. The clatter would wake them up. So they keep themselves from falling into a true sleep.
Why the pot underneath so it clings, wouldn't just hit the floor make the same sound?
Not enough extra surely a wooden floor clang clang, clang, goes the trolley.
Wow, they had a god to stay in the hypnogogic. Isn't that very attractive to me? To me, it is to linger there.
I mean it sounds like a nightmare, but to not be able to slip into sleep.
Yeah, but that's here's here's what happens. Clang clang clang, goes to trolley.
Now you're right now you then you jot down Goopla Khan or whatever. Okay, you jot down your epic.
That's very real. That's real because then you can sleep, then you can listen, because don't you have that experience. There is that thing right before you fall asleep where you start having crazy ideas, sinence to start forming that makes no sense, or you start having I mean, that is incredible. That is so real.
I think that's the hypnogogic. Oh, it's the real sweet spot.
Because that's when narrative like collapses and you're able to just like words just start forming and ideas like I've had, I get like into these kind of emphatic monologues right in that space. Really, but I'm talking about like what I'm talking about makes no sense, much like poog. Yeah, but how dare I? How dare I? How dare How's that?
How dare I'm doing a good podcast?
How is that?
I thought I heard a little bit of your Irish.
When you do Irish, you know, I can't do it if it's requested. I mean, there's nothing worse, of course not.
I would never, I would never right after rap in a second, So we're gonna have to wrap it up.
Wait, but there was something in closing. What it was Kate just talking.
About probably asleep doing the Yeah, yeah, yeah.
The hypnagogia. Yeah yeah, yeah.
I want to explore that further, and I want to maybe one day we'll do we'll do the clanger on poog, like we'll go there, Yeah, we'll whisper the visions like we'll basically try to go to sleep on Poog.
I think the listeners would really enjoy that. Ooh, that's attempting a nap on poog. Could be revolutionary. All right, it's all I got. Revolutionary. Jesus, try a new word. I need six new words now, I need them yesterday.
I need like new words to enter because.
Because we are suffering under our own, our coats have become I haven't read.
For I can't read last couple of days. Can't do it, won't do it. Okay, Honestly, I thought this was a joy.
I want everyone to know for well, I don't think shit is funny, okay, I don't like bathroom humors.
We think it's very serious and we're very serious. And I'm going to listen to me colonic in June. It's happening. Sure, i'll go today. Don't even tep me, sweetie, because I know a place. Why.
Bye? All right, we got to wrap up.
I don't know when you passed, June. I'm scared still, I guess. Okay, I'll bring you, I'll deliver you. Okay, great, all right, I love you. I love you. That was pood. If you enjoyed poop, please subscribe, rate, and review. If not, we will press charges
