Summary: 

Boys and men are struggling—but this isn't a reason to lose hope. In this episode, Shaunti and Jeff unpack what's happening in today's culture, why so many boys and young men are falling behind, and the simple, powerful ways each of us can make a difference. Whether you're a parent, grandparent, mentor, teacher, or friend, you'll come away with practical encouragement and renewed hope for the boys and men you love. 

Resources and Links: 

Nancy Pearcy “The Toxic War on Masculinity” 

https://a.co/d/05CJjqrE 

Hannah Rosin, The End of Men essay in The Atlantic 

https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2010/07/the-end-of-men/308135/ 

“If We Were Ants” short film 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FX23DMyzvHE 

Pew Research -Public Views on Men and Masculinity 

https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2024/10/17/public-views-on-men-and-masculinity/ 

APA Guidelines on practice with boys and men 

https://www.apa.org/about/policy/boys-men-practice-guidelines.pdf 

Data tables: 

Reading scores of 4th, 8th and 12th grade students – see Figure 5, 6, 7 

https://nces.ed.gov/programs/coe/indicator/cnb/reading-performance 

College enrollment of men v women 

https://nces.ed.gov/programs/coe/pdf/2024/cpb_508c.pdf 

https://nces.ed.gov/programs/digest/d22/tables/dt22_303.10.asp 

Bureau of Labor Statistics about men and women in the workforce: 

https://www.bls.gov/charts/employment-situation/civilian-labor-force-participation-rate.htm 

Mortality data: 

https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/products/databriefs/db456.htm 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FX23DMyzvHE 

Summary: 
Boys and men are struggling&mdash;but this isn't a reason to lose hope. In this episode, Shaunti and Jeff unpack what's happening in today's culture, why so many boys and young men are falling behind, and the simple, powerful ways each of us can make a difference. Whether you're a parent, grandparent, mentor, teacher, or friend, you'll come away with practical encouragement and renewed hope for the boys and men you love.&nbsp;
Resources and Links:&nbsp;
Nancy Pearcy &ldquo;The Toxic War on Masculinity&rdquo;&nbsp;
<a href="https://a.co/d/05CJjqrE">https://a.co/d/05CJjqrE</a>&nbsp;
Hannah Rosin, The End of Men essay in The Atlantic&nbsp;
<a href="https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2010/07/the-end-of-men/308135/">https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2010/07/the-end-of-men/308135/</a>&nbsp;
&ldquo;If We Were Ants&rdquo; short film&nbsp;
<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FX23DMyzvHE">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FX23DMyzvHE</a>&nbsp;
Pew Research -Public Views on Men and Masculinity&nbsp;
<a href="https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2024/10/17/public-views-on-men-and-masculinity/">https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2024/10/17/public-views-on-men-and-masculinity/</a>&nbsp;
APA Guidelines on practice with boys and men&nbsp;
<a href="https://www.apa.org/about/policy/boys-men-practice-guidelines.pdf">https://www.apa.org/about/policy/boys-men-practice-guidelines.pdf</a>&nbsp;
Data tables:&nbsp;
Reading scores of&nbsp;4th, 8th&nbsp;and 12th&nbsp;grade students &ndash; see Figure 5, 6, 7&nbsp;
<a href="https://nces.ed.gov/programs/coe/indicator/cnb/reading-performance">https://nces.ed.gov/programs/coe/indicator/cnb/reading-performance</a>&nbsp;
College enrollment of men v women&nbsp;
<a href="https://nces.ed.gov/programs/coe/pdf/2024/cpb_508c.pdf">https://nces.ed.gov/programs/coe/pdf/2024/cpb_508c.pdf</a>&nbsp;
<a href="https://nces.ed.gov/programs/digest/d22/tables/dt22_303.10.asp">https://nces.ed.gov/programs/digest/d22/tables/dt22_303.10.asp</a>&nbsp;
Bureau of Labor Statistics about men and women in the workforce:&nbsp;
<a href="https://www.bls.gov/charts/employment-situation/civilian-labor-force-participation-rate.htm">https://www.bls.gov/charts/employment-situation/civilian-labor-force-participation-rate.htm</a>&nbsp;
Mortality data:&nbsp;
<a href="https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/products/databriefs/db456.htm">https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/products/databriefs/db456.htm</a>&nbsp;
<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FX23DMyzvHE">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FX23DMyzvHE</a>&nbsp;

Relationship tripwires. Mental health puzzles. Confusing work dynamics. You’re not the only one scratching your head. But now you have a secret decoder ring! Each episode of I Wish You Could Hear This is packed with proven, simple, and surprising secrets that help you thrive in life, faith, and relationships. Researchers Shaunti and Jeff Feldhahn have spent decades interviewing and surveying more than 40,000 people to identify the little things that make a big difference in our lives. They’re Harvard-educated, Christian authors and speakers who also happen to be happily married, analytically minded, and a whole lot of fun! Join them and their guests for real stories, real help, and real hope.

I Wish You Could Hear This

Relationship tripwires. Mental health puzzles. Confusing work dynamics. You&rsquo;re not the only one scratching your head. But now you have a secret decoder ring! Each episode of I Wish You Could Hear This is packed with proven, simple, and surprising secrets that help you thrive in life, faith, and relationships. Researchers Shaunti and Jeff Feldhahn have spent decades interviewing and surveying more than 40,000 people to identify the little things that make a big difference in our lives. They&rsquo;re Harvard-educated, Christian authors and speakers who also happen to be happily married, analytically minded, and a whole lot of fun! Join them and their guests for real stories, real help, and real hope.

What's Happening to Our Boys and How You Can Help, Episode 45 

https://api.omny.fm/orgs/5e27a451-e6e6-4c51-aa03-a7370003783c/clips/13ae9bff-49d4-4882-ba98-b478014e3307/transcript

Summary: 

In this episode, Shaunti and Jeff Feldhahn sit down with author, counselor, and father-daughter relationship expert Michelle Watson Canfield to explore one of the most challenging seasons of parenting: connecting with adolescent daughters. 

Many dads feel uncertain about how to respond when their daughters become more emotional, pull away, or seem resistant to their efforts. Michelle shares a powerful insight she has observed through years of counseling: many men would rather do nothing than risk doing it wrong—but when it comes to fathering daughters, stepping back often creates more distance. 

Together, Shaunti, Jeff, and Michelle unpack why dads often feel sidelined during the teenage years, how mothers can become caught in the middle, and practical ways fathers can stay engaged even when conversations feel awkward or difficult. 

You’ll learn: 
Why many dads instinctively pull back—and why that can be harmful 
How to stay calm and grounded when emotions run high 
Practical ways to pursue your daughter with intention and consistency 
Why your presence matters more than your perfection 
How to build trust and connection during the adolescent years 

If you've ever felt unsure how to connect with your daughter—or worried that you're getting it wrong—this conversation will equip and encourage you to keep showing up. 

Because your daughter doesn't need a perfect dad. She needs an engaged one. 

Links and Resources: 

Website: drmichellewatson.com 

Facebook: www.facebook.com/drmichellewatson 

Instagram: michellejwatson and thedadwhispererpodcast 

Twitter: @mwatsonphd 

LinkedIn: Dr. Michelle Watson Canfield 

The Dad Whisperer Podcast: Apple Podcasts + Spotify 

YouTube: @thedadwhisperer 

Summary:&nbsp;
In this episode, Shaunti and Jeff Feldhahn sit down with author, counselor, and father-daughter relationship expert Michelle Watson Canfield to explore one of the most challenging seasons of parenting: connecting with adolescent daughters.&nbsp;
Many dads feel uncertain about how to respond when their daughters become more emotional, pull away, or seem resistant to their efforts. Michelle shares a powerful insight she has&nbsp;observed&nbsp;through years of counseling: many men would rather do nothing than risk doing it wrong&mdash;but when it comes to fathering daughters, stepping back often creates more distance.&nbsp;
Together, Shaunti, Jeff, and Michelle unpack why dads often feel sidelined during the teenage years, how mothers can become caught in the middle, and practical ways fathers can stay engaged even when conversations feel awkward or difficult.&nbsp;
You&rsquo;ll&nbsp;learn:&nbsp;
<ul>
<li aria-setsize="-1" data-leveltext="" data-font="Symbol" data-listid="1" data-list-defn-props="{&quot;335552541&quot;:1,&quot;335559683&quot;:0,&quot;335559684&quot;:-2,&quot;335559685&quot;:720,&quot;335559991&quot;:360,&quot;469769226&quot;:&quot;Symbol&quot;,&quot;469769242&quot;:[8226],&quot;469777803&quot;:&quot;left&quot;,&quot;469777804&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;469777815&quot;:&quot;hybridMultilevel&quot;}" data-aria-posinset="1" data-aria-level="1">Why many dads instinctively pull back&mdash;and why that can be harmful&nbsp;</li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li aria-setsize="-1" data-leveltext="" data-font="Symbol" data-listid="1" data-list-defn-props="{&quot;335552541&quot;:1,&quot;335559683&quot;:0,&quot;335559684&quot;:-2,&quot;335559685&quot;:720,&quot;335559991&quot;:360,&quot;469769226&quot;:&quot;Symbol&quot;,&quot;469769242&quot;:[8226],&quot;469777803&quot;:&quot;left&quot;,&quot;469777804&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;469777815&quot;:&quot;hybridMultilevel&quot;}" data-aria-posinset="2" data-aria-level="1">How to stay calm and grounded when emotions run high&nbsp;</li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li aria-setsize="-1" data-leveltext="" data-font="Symbol" data-listid="1" data-list-defn-props="{&quot;335552541&quot;:1,&quot;335559683&quot;:0,&quot;335559684&quot;:-2,&quot;335559685&quot;:720,&quot;335559991&quot;:360,&quot;469769226&quot;:&quot;Symbol&quot;,&quot;469769242&quot;:[8226],&quot;469777803&quot;:&quot;left&quot;,&quot;469777804&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;469777815&quot;:&quot;hybridMultilevel&quot;}" data-aria-posinset="3" data-aria-level="1">Practical ways to pursue your daughter with intention and consistency&nbsp;</li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li aria-setsize="-1" data-leveltext="" data-font="Symbol" data-listid="1" data-list-defn-props="{&quot;335552541&quot;:1,&quot;335559683&quot;:0,&quot;335559684&quot;:-2,&quot;335559685&quot;:720,&quot;335559991&quot;:360,&quot;469769226&quot;:&quot;Symbol&quot;,&quot;469769242&quot;:[8226],&quot;469777803&quot;:&quot;left&quot;,&quot;469777804&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;469777815&quot;:&quot;hybridMultilevel&quot;}" data-aria-posinset="4" data-aria-level="1">Why your presence matters more than your perfection&nbsp;</li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li aria-setsize="-1" data-leveltext="" data-font="Symbol" data-listid="1" data-list-defn-props="{&quot;335552541&quot;:1,&quot;335559683&quot;:0,&quot;335559684&quot;:-2,&quot;335559685&quot;:720,&quot;335559991&quot;:360,&quot;469769226&quot;:&quot;Symbol&quot;,&quot;469769242&quot;:[8226],&quot;469777803&quot;:&quot;left&quot;,&quot;469777804&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;469777815&quot;:&quot;hybridMultilevel&quot;}" data-aria-posinset="5" data-aria-level="1">How to build trust and connection during the adolescent years&nbsp;</li>
</ul>
If&nbsp;you've&nbsp;ever felt unsure how to connect with your daughter&mdash;or worried that&nbsp;you're&nbsp;getting it wrong&mdash;this conversation will equip and encourage you to keep showing up.&nbsp;
Because your daughter&nbsp;doesn't&nbsp;need a perfect dad. She needs an engaged one.&nbsp;
Links and Resources:&nbsp;
Website: drmichellewatson.com&nbsp;
Facebook:&nbsp;<a href="https://www.facebook.com/drmichellewatson">www.facebook.com/drmichellewatson</a>&nbsp;
Instagram:&nbsp;michellejwatson&nbsp;and&nbsp;thedadwhispererpodcast&nbsp;
Twitter: @mwatsonphd&nbsp;
LinkedIn: Dr. Michelle Watson Canfield&nbsp;
The Dad Whisperer Podcast: Apple Podcasts + Spotify&nbsp;
YouTube: @thedadwhisperer&nbsp;

What Every Dad Needs to Know About Your Teenage Daughter, with Michelle Watson Canfield 

https://api.omny.fm/orgs/5e27a451-e6e6-4c51-aa03-a7370003783c/clips/55162c02-5ea4-4dcb-b6da-b46b01650927/transcript

SUMMARY: What happens when a marriage starts drifting apart — and one or both spouses wonder if it’s even possible to reconnect? 

In this honest and hope-filled conversation, and sit down with author, speaker, and podcast host to talk about the quiet disconnection many couples experience and the practical ways healing can begin — even when things feel broken.  

Drawing from Lindsey’s personal story and her new book Don’t Burn Down the House, this episode explores: 
Why many marriages slowly drift into “roommate mode”  
What often causes emotional disconnection beneath the surface  
How resentment and hopelessness quietly build  
Why change can begin even if only one spouse is willing  
The small shifts that can create major transformation  
How to prioritize your marriage without losing yourself  
What rebuilding trust and connection really looks like  

If you’ve ever felt discouraged, lonely, unseen, or unsure whether your marriage can recover, this conversation offers practical wisdom and genuine hope. 

LINKS AND RESOURCES: Book: Don't Burn Your Own House Down: Prioritizing Your Marriage, Your Spouse, and Yourself for a Deeper Connection: Maestas, Lindsey: 9780310369479: Amazon.com: Books 

Website: HOME - Sparrows + Lily 

SUMMARY:&nbsp;What happens when a marriage starts drifting apart &mdash; and one or both spouses wonder if&nbsp;it&rsquo;s&nbsp;even possible to reconnect?&nbsp;
In this honest and hope-filled conversation, and sit down with author, speaker, and podcast host to talk about the quiet disconnection many couples experience and the practical ways healing can begin &mdash; even when things feel broken.&nbsp;&nbsp;
Drawing from Lindsey&rsquo;s personal story and her new book&nbsp;Don&rsquo;t&nbsp;Burn Down the House, this episode explores:&nbsp;
<ul>
<li aria-setsize="-1" data-leveltext="" data-font="Symbol" data-listid="1" data-list-defn-props="{&quot;335552541&quot;:1,&quot;335559683&quot;:0,&quot;335559684&quot;:-2,&quot;335559685&quot;:720,&quot;335559991&quot;:360,&quot;469769226&quot;:&quot;Symbol&quot;,&quot;469769242&quot;:[8226],&quot;469777803&quot;:&quot;left&quot;,&quot;469777804&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;469777815&quot;:&quot;hybridMultilevel&quot;}" data-aria-posinset="1" data-aria-level="1">Why many marriages slowly drift into &ldquo;roommate mode&rdquo;&nbsp;&nbsp;</li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li aria-setsize="-1" data-leveltext="" data-font="Symbol" data-listid="1" data-list-defn-props="{&quot;335552541&quot;:1,&quot;335559683&quot;:0,&quot;335559684&quot;:-2,&quot;335559685&quot;:720,&quot;335559991&quot;:360,&quot;469769226&quot;:&quot;Symbol&quot;,&quot;469769242&quot;:[8226],&quot;469777803&quot;:&quot;left&quot;,&quot;469777804&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;469777815&quot;:&quot;hybridMultilevel&quot;}" data-aria-posinset="2" data-aria-level="1">What often causes emotional disconnection beneath the surface&nbsp;&nbsp;</li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li aria-setsize="-1" data-leveltext="" data-font="Symbol" data-listid="1" data-list-defn-props="{&quot;335552541&quot;:1,&quot;335559683&quot;:0,&quot;335559684&quot;:-2,&quot;335559685&quot;:720,&quot;335559991&quot;:360,&quot;469769226&quot;:&quot;Symbol&quot;,&quot;469769242&quot;:[8226],&quot;469777803&quot;:&quot;left&quot;,&quot;469777804&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;469777815&quot;:&quot;hybridMultilevel&quot;}" data-aria-posinset="3" data-aria-level="1">How resentment and hopelessness quietly build&nbsp;&nbsp;</li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li aria-setsize="-1" data-leveltext="" data-font="Symbol" data-listid="1" data-list-defn-props="{&quot;335552541&quot;:1,&quot;335559683&quot;:0,&quot;335559684&quot;:-2,&quot;335559685&quot;:720,&quot;335559991&quot;:360,&quot;469769226&quot;:&quot;Symbol&quot;,&quot;469769242&quot;:[8226],&quot;469777803&quot;:&quot;left&quot;,&quot;469777804&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;469777815&quot;:&quot;hybridMultilevel&quot;}" data-aria-posinset="4" data-aria-level="1">Why change can begin even if only one spouse is willing&nbsp;&nbsp;</li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li aria-setsize="-1" data-leveltext="" data-font="Symbol" data-listid="1" data-list-defn-props="{&quot;335552541&quot;:1,&quot;335559683&quot;:0,&quot;335559684&quot;:-2,&quot;335559685&quot;:720,&quot;335559991&quot;:360,&quot;469769226&quot;:&quot;Symbol&quot;,&quot;469769242&quot;:[8226],&quot;469777803&quot;:&quot;left&quot;,&quot;469777804&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;469777815&quot;:&quot;hybridMultilevel&quot;}" data-aria-posinset="5" data-aria-level="1">The small shifts that can create major transformation&nbsp;&nbsp;</li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li aria-setsize="-1" data-leveltext="" data-font="Symbol" data-listid="1" data-list-defn-props="{&quot;335552541&quot;:1,&quot;335559683&quot;:0,&quot;335559684&quot;:-2,&quot;335559685&quot;:720,&quot;335559991&quot;:360,&quot;469769226&quot;:&quot;Symbol&quot;,&quot;469769242&quot;:[8226],&quot;469777803&quot;:&quot;left&quot;,&quot;469777804&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;469777815&quot;:&quot;hybridMultilevel&quot;}" data-aria-posinset="6" data-aria-level="1">How to prioritize your marriage without losing yourself&nbsp;&nbsp;</li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li aria-setsize="-1" data-leveltext="" data-font="Symbol" data-listid="1" data-list-defn-props="{&quot;335552541&quot;:1,&quot;335559683&quot;:0,&quot;335559684&quot;:-2,&quot;335559685&quot;:720,&quot;335559991&quot;:360,&quot;469769226&quot;:&quot;Symbol&quot;,&quot;469769242&quot;:[8226],&quot;469777803&quot;:&quot;left&quot;,&quot;469777804&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;469777815&quot;:&quot;hybridMultilevel&quot;}" data-aria-posinset="7" data-aria-level="1">What rebuilding trust and connection really looks like&nbsp;&nbsp;</li>
</ul>
If&nbsp;you&rsquo;ve&nbsp;ever felt discouraged, lonely, unseen, or unsure whether your marriage can recover, this conversation offers practical wisdom and genuine hope.&nbsp;
LINKS AND RESOURCES:&nbsp;Book:&nbsp;<a href="https://www.amazon.com/dp/0310369479/?bestFormat=true&amp;k=don%27t%20burn%20your%20own%20house%20down&amp;ref_=nb_sb_ss_w_scx-ent-bk-v2_k2_1_20_de&amp;crid=2PKR3UOYU0M8U&amp;sprefix=Don%27t%20Burn%20The%20House">Don't Burn Your Own House Down: Prioritizing Your Marriage, Your Spouse, and Yourself for a Deeper Connection: Maestas, Lindsey: 9780310369479: Amazon.com: Books</a>&nbsp;
Website:&nbsp;<a href="https://sparrowsandlily.com/">HOME - Sparrows + Lily</a>&nbsp;

Why Couples Drift and How to Reverse It, with Lindsey Maestas – Episode 43

https://api.omny.fm/orgs/5e27a451-e6e6-4c51-aa03-a7370003783c/clips/e5aca097-bbec-4a06-ae88-b43600fd5e85/transcript

Summary: In this powerful episode of I Wish You Could Hear This, Shaunti and Jeff Feldhahn sit down with author, speaker, and ministry leader Willow Weston to explore what it means to truly heal from hurt instead of hiding from it. Together, they unpack how unresolved pain can surface in anxiety, broken relationships, unforgiveness, and emotional exhaustion—and why healing begins when we stop running from our wounds and bring them honestly before God.  

Willow shares her personal story, the heart behind her ministry Collide, and insights from her new book about embracing pain as part of the pathway to restoration and deeper connection. This conversation offers encouragement for anyone carrying hidden hurt, walking through disappointment, or longing to experience emotional and spiritual healing. 

You’ll hear: 
Why unprocessed pain often “comes out sideways”  
How honesty and vulnerability open the door to healing  
The role faith and community play in restoration  
Encouragement for those feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or emotionally exhausted  
Hope for healing not only for ourselves, but also for the people we love  

If you’ve ever wondered whether real healing is possible, this episode is a reminder that God meets us in our pain—and that hope and restoration are closer than we think. 

Links and Resources: 

Book: Collide 

Website: https://wecollide.net/staff/willow-weston/ 

Summary:&nbsp;In this powerful episode of&nbsp;I Wish You Could Hear This, Shaunti and Jeff Feldhahn sit down with author, speaker, and ministry leader Willow Weston to explore what it means to truly heal from hurt instead of hiding from it. Together, they unpack how unresolved pain can surface in anxiety, broken relationships, unforgiveness, and emotional exhaustion&mdash;and why healing begins when we stop running from our wounds and bring them honestly before God.&nbsp;&nbsp;
Willow shares her personal story, the heart behind her ministry&nbsp;Collide, and insights from her new book about embracing pain as part of the pathway to restoration and deeper connection.&nbsp;This conversation offers encouragement for anyone carrying hidden hurt, walking through disappointment, or longing to experience emotional and spiritual healing.&nbsp;
You&rsquo;ll&nbsp;hear:&nbsp;
<ul>
<li>Why unprocessed pain often &ldquo;comes out sideways&rdquo;&nbsp;&nbsp;</li>
<li>How honesty and vulnerability open the door to healing&nbsp;&nbsp;</li>
<li>The role faith and community play in restoration&nbsp;&nbsp;</li>
<li>Encouragement for those feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or emotionally exhausted&nbsp;&nbsp;</li>
<li>Hope for healing not only for ourselves, but also for the people we love&nbsp;&nbsp;</li>
</ul>
If&nbsp;you&rsquo;ve&nbsp;ever wondered whether real healing is possible, this episode is a reminder that God meets us in our pain&mdash;and that hope and restoration are closer than we think.&nbsp;
Links and Resources:&nbsp;
Book: <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Collide-Running-Into-Healing-Hands/dp/B0FD7PQ768">Collide</a>&nbsp;
Website:&nbsp;<a href="https://wecollide.net/staff/willow-weston/">https://wecollide.net/staff/willow-weston/</a>&nbsp;

Tired of Carrying Hidden Hurt? Finding Healing, with Willow Weston - Episode 42

https://api.omny.fm/orgs/5e27a451-e6e6-4c51-aa03-a7370003783c/clips/ec11c44a-0cba-4c44-a172-b44f00311de7/transcript

What's Happening to Our Boys and How You Can Help, Episode 45

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