Happy PantsThis week Geraldine's happy pants are a bit baggy above the knees, and a bit tight below the knees... perhaps they're riding britches? Jo's happy pants also seem to be riding britches, in the kind of brown that reminds her of the taste when she was allowed to scrape out the bowl when Gran made a delicious cake.
Meanwhile, something has happened at Happy Pants Headquarters to make them very untidy indeed! And there's a special guest on her way, so they'd better clear up, and fast...
Meanwhile you'll go on a magical unicorn ride, hear a story and get to 'horse around' with the Happy Pants crew.
One, two, three. It's happy pants.
Good day. And welcome to Happy Pants, a show specially for kids and especially for you. My name is Geraldine and my name is Joe. And together we're your happy pants team for today. Are you wearing your happy pants today? We are today. Mine are a bit baggy above the knees and a bit tight below the knees. I think they might be riding breeches. They're brown, and this kind of brown reminds me of how wet sand feels when it squishes between my toes.
Mine are brown riding breeches, too. This kind of brown reminds me of the taste when I was allowed to scrape out the bowl when Grande made a cake. Um, just asking Geraldine, but what on earth have you done to our nice, tidy, Happy Pants headquarters?
Well, I thought I'd have a really good clean up ready for the new year. I planned to have it all cleaned up before you arrived, but I got distracted.
Big word alert. Distracted means thinking of something else. Not the task in hand.
Yeah. I kept thinking about all these clues. Happy pants put in our pockets during the last year. We put them in boxes, but we've run out of cupboard room. I thought if I repacked them, that would make some more space. A real mare's nest at the moment.
Why do you call that mess a mare's nest?
Well, horses don't make nests. nest. And if a mare tried to, it'd be an untidy mess. A mare's nest is an impossibly untidy mess, one that would be hard to clean up.
Cleaning up this lot will be a nightmare.
And that is a horse of a different color.
Oh, now I'm really, really confused. Why is this nightmare a horse of a different color? Well.
The word nightmare comes from a very ancient word, mare. A mare was a feeling of being trapped, as if there was something weighing you down. And if this feeling was in a dream at night, it was a nightmare. Over the centuries, mare was shortened to mare. And the two words became joined to mean a bad dream. Nightmare. That mare has nothing to do with real horses.
Neither does a horse of a different color. Allah. That just means something different from that which you expected. It's not a real horse.
We've been so busy trying to clean up this mare's nest that we've forgotten to look in our pockets this morning.
Oh, happy pants have lots of pockets. Okay. Let's check.
Woohoo! I have some sort of machine in mind.
Oh, it is a big box. Oh, what does it say on that label, Geraldine?
Um. Um. Happy pants. Clue converter. I wonder what that is. How about yours, Joe?
Oh, well. Oh, mine has an extension cord. And hang on a post bag. Oh, it's already stamped and addressed. It says return to HP clue factory. Third star from the left, the Milky Way.
Well, let's look at that machine. I think that plug goes in here. How about we plug it in, turn it on and put one of last year's clues in where it says in.
Okay. That'll be interesting. Here's a big toy truck. Geraldine.
Oh, that's much too big, Joe.
Well, it wasn't when it was in your pocket. It only grew big when you pulled it out. Like all happy pants clues.
True. Okay, here we go.
See? The truck shrank to the size of a pea and fell out into this tray. The one that says out.
Oh, great. We can shrink a whole year's worth of clues and post them back in the bag provided. And that'll leave plenty of space for new clues.
Oh, I've just found a new clue in my pocket. Oh, it's a cute toy unicorn.
Unicorns do look a lot like horses, don't they? That horn sort of gives them away, though.
Geraldine, I think I've worked out what we're supposed to do today.
Brilliant. Jo. What?
Well, that's after we've fed all the clues into the machine and tidy it up. Of course. Then we can look at today's new clues. You talked about mare's nest. Then nightmare popped into my head.
I see. Then there was a horse of a different colour. And now a unicorn. I see they're all horses that aren't really horses.
Yes, and a mare's nest isn't made by a horse. It's just a mess. A nightmare isn't a horse. It's a bad dream. A horse of a different colour is just something different. And a unicorn. Ah, well, I wish there were unicorns.
Just imagine a herd of unicorns galloping across a great plain white coats, gleaming silver horns glinting in the moonlight. Could you imagine riding a unicorn with the wind blowing your hair up hills and down valleys, hardly touching the ground, clearing whole rivers in long, smooth jumps? Find some clear space and let the music take you on a unicorn ride.
Ah, now I know why our happy pants are riding breeches today. Oh, that was fun.
Are we expecting visitors, Joe?
Oh, yes. Geraldine. Maddy said she might drop in, she said. Happy pants sent her a parcel yesterday, and she wants to show us.
Good morning. Maddy. Sorry about the mess. We're nearly finished feeding it into the converter, but there's still a few things to go.
Good morning Geraldine. Good morning Joe. I can give you a hand with that in a minute. But first I wanted to show you this. It arrived in yesterday's post.
Oh, what a strange looking thing. It has a human head and body down to the waistline, and the rest of the body looks like a horse.
Is it a horse with a human head and arms, or a human with the body and legs of a horse? Could it be a centaur?
I'll look it up in the Happy Pants encyclopedia.
Big word alert. Encyclopedia means all learning. So it is a collection of known facts about just about everything.
It says Centaur, a mythical creature. Half man, half horse.
Big word. Alert. Mythical. A myth is something which is not fact, but which some people believe.
Centaurs are a myth. Of course. There are no creatures which are half man, half horse. The myth may have started thousands of years ago when humans started to tame and ride the wild horses on the plains of Asia. If you had never seen a horse with a rider before, and you saw this creature with four legs, dressed in animal skins and waving a bow and arrow galloping towards you, you might have been scared out of your wits. Maybe centaurs were really men riding horses.
Well, the centaur myth may have started with something which was real, just misunderstood by those early people. But there is a flying horse, which is pure imagination.
Oh, do you mean Pegasus? Pegasus was supposed to be a horse with wings which could fly anywhere, even to visit the gods that were supposed to live on Mount Olympus.
That would be magical. Being carried wherever you wanted to go by a beautiful horse with feathery wings. I guess I'll have to have to be content with dreaming about it. It's not going to happen in the real world. It would make a lovely lullaby, though. Drifting off to sleep. Thinking about all the pretty little horses.
Ooh ooh. Ooh ah. Ah. Ooh ah. Ooh ah ah. Oh. Oh, oh.
Hi. My name is Mackenzie, and you're listening to Happy Pants on Vision Australia Radio. Fun fact horses and cows sleep standing up.
Can you think of any other horses that aren't really horses?
Um. Um. Oh. How about white horses at the beach?
There have never been any white horses when I've been at the beach.
Oh, you probably went on nice days when the water wasn't stirred up.
You know, in olden times, people used to believe that when the water was rough with lots of foam on the waves, it was because the sea God's horses were galloping around and churning things up. Now we know rough seas are made by winds and tides, but the white foam on the waves is still called white horses. Just because it because it sounds nice.
Someone said I was a dark horse the other day. I definitely wasn't eating carrots, galloping around the paddock or saying no to everything. I just got all the right answers in the maths test.
Do you always get everything right, Maddy?
No, I usually get a B score, but this time I got an A.
Oh, that's why they said you were a dark horse. They didn't expect you to win. You came from behind and they didn't see you coming.
Oh, so being a dark horse isn't such a bad thing?
I've thought of a famous horse that wasn't a real horse.
Oh, I thought we'd thought of them all. What's this one?
A Trojan horse.
Oh, that is a famous, not real horse.
I've heard of that one. I think it's about a sneaky trick. Some Greek warriors used to get into the walled city of Troy. Long, long ago.
Well, you're right, Maddie. The story goes that a Trojan prince called Paris visited a Greek king. The Greek king's wife was so beautiful that Paris sailed off back to Troy with her on board. Which upset the Greek king quite a bit. He gathered a huge army and sailed to Troy to get her back. But the city walls of Troy were so strong that the Greek soldiers couldn't break them down.
Then a clever little Greek fellow called Odysseus had a bright idea. He had the ships carpenters build a huge wooden horse on wheels. The sneaky bit was that the body with the horse was big enough to hide some of the Greek warriors. And when it was finished and the warriors were inside, the Greeks held a great ceremony in front of it. Then they all packed up and sailed away, leaving the great wooden horse on the beach.
Well, the Trojans were curious. And as soon as the coast was clear, they came out to see what the wooden horse was all about. And they soon found a dirty, ragged man hiding nearby. It was Odysseus in disguise. He said he was a slave who had escaped from a cruel master, and begged that if they would let him stay, he'd tell them the secret of the wooden horse. Well, the Trojans were so desperate to know about the horse, so they agreed.
Odysseus told them that the horse was an offering to the sea gods for a safe journey back to Greece, as long as the wooden horse remained near the sea. There would be calm weather. There would be no storms, so all the ships would get home safely. If the horse was taken away, all the good luck would go with it and the ships would sink. The The Trojans fell for the trick. They dragged the horse with the warriors still inside, through the gates and into the city, thinking all the luck from the sea gods would stay inside their own walls.
Then, when everyone was asleep, the warriors crept out and opened the city gates from the inside. The ships hadn't gone home. They'd just sailed out of sight and come back as soon as it was dark. The warriors poured into the city. Helen was rescued, and the story of the Trojan horse became a legend. Whether it was true or not, it was still a good story.
So a Trojan horse isn't a real horse. It's something which appears to be one thing but hides a secret inside. Or let's have some horsey music. This should set you galloping.
Okay. Find a clear space where you can tap your feet, clap your Clap your hands and go for a good gallop.
Oh, that was some gallop. Our story today is about a dream pony, one which takes its rider to all sorts of wonderful places. Yay!
It's story time.
A sparkly pony story written by Nicola Baxter. At night, the moon and stars shine down on hills and valleys, rivers and seas, villages and towns. And they shine down on cities too. But the lights from a million windows shine brighter still. From her bedroom window Ellie could look out across her city. It was beautiful in its way, but Ellie couldn't see that her dreams were not about people or buildings or moonlight. Ellie loved ponies. She loved the way they could be. Strong but gentle, wild but friendly, magical but warm and loving too. She longed for the day when she could move to the country where maybe, just maybe, she could have a pony of her own. But Ellie's mother said, my work is in the city. Sweetheart, I'm afraid that moving to the country can only be a dream. So Ellie went to bed each night and tried to dream a special dream. But nothing happened. Then one night, when she wasn't trying at all, a special dream found her. She dreamt she was walking in a magical world in the sky. The moon gleamed and stars glittered under her feet. Soft grass tickled her toes and the river lapped gently beside her. Suddenly something white and shimmering was coming towards her. Ellie hardly dared to breathe. It was a pony. Ellie walked towards the magical pony. Slowly she held out her hand even more slowly. The pony bent her head and nuzzled her warm nose into Ellie's palm. You're perfect. Ellie breathed. And the pony stamped one delicate hoof and tossed her glorious mane as though to agree. The pony looked at Ellie with her great dark eyes. Ellie knew what the beautiful animal was telling her. She shook her head. Oh, I can't, she said. I don't know how to ride. But the next moment she found herself sitting on the pony's back and they were flying. Ellie looked down and saw that the earth was far below. But she didn't feel frightened. Anything was possible now. After that, the dream found Ellie many times. And the pony carried her over the sea and to every land she had ever imagined. Then one night the pony carried her into a beautiful world of lights. Where a sparkling river ran between buildings that reached to the sky. And Ellie was carried right back to her own bedroom window and her warm bed waiting inside. In the morning, Ellie and her mother stood by the window together and watched as sparkling rain fell over the whole city. You know, said Ellie's mother, we will go one day. It will happen. Ellie, I promise. And Ellie said, I know.
That was a reading of a sparkly pony story Written by Nicola Baxter. The reader was Rebecca.
Happy parents is a special radio show just for kids like you and me.
Would you like a dream pony? One that carried you wherever your dreams led you? Hmm, I think I would too. Oh, now what have we done today?
We found out a lot about horses that aren't really horses.
Yeah, and there were four big words to add to our big words list. Distracted. Which means thinking about something else. Encyclopedia, a series of books in which all the known facts about most things are recorded. Centaur, a mythical creature which was half man, half horse and myth. Something which is not a fact, but which some people might have believed. and we had a story about a dream pony.
If there was anything in today's program about which you would like to know more, you can find us at Radiovision Australia.
Keep wearing those happy pants and we'll catch you next time.
Happy pants is.
Produced on the lands of the Whadjuk Noongar people. Vision Australia Radio acknowledges Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the first Australians, and the traditional owners of the land across our working area. We pay our respects to elders past, present and future in maintaining their cultures, countries and their spiritual connection to the lands and waters. Vision Australia Radio acknowledges and respects the genuine diversity and richness of Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples across Australia. Happy pants has been made possible with the support of the Community Broadcasting Foundation.
