If there's something I'll get if I'm a good friend. Hi, everybody, it's Jamie Lee Curtis. You're listening to the Good Friend Podcast, presented to you by I Heart Radio. It's a podcast about friendship, sort of the good, the bad, and the ugly, the triumphs of friendship, the immense connection and emotion of friendship, the laughter and occasionally the tears. We explore it all in an unscripted, very free form way with many, many different guests, some I'm very close friends with, some I've never met. And I hope that you will take away from it something that connects you to your friends, and that the ideas that we talk about can maybe be taken into your own friendships. So sit back, or take a walk, or however you listen. I hope you enjoy it and stay tuned a good Friend. We've started rolling on this podcast today, uh in an unexpected way, which is perfect for me. Um. My guest right now is Leah Michelle, and Leah was just discussing how her mother ended up living with her for the year basically from the moment she found out she was pregnant through the birth of her son. So I just thought it was because, by the way, there is no greater definition of the word good friend than a mother who suits up and shows up in partnership with their daughter. And I just thought that was. You know, here we are talking about good friends. But to me, that's the greatest, um sort of designation of a friend. Um, so just tell me more about what that was like to have your mom there with you the whole man. Well, I think it was. It was her greatest dream come true for sure. Um, it was unexpected. And my mother and my mother's my second to Jonathan, or not second to Jonathan equally, Jonathan and my mother are my best friends. My my mother is my best friend, and my mom and I have had a very interesting relationship throughout the years. I think that any mother and daughter relationship that sometimes can be a little too ameshed can have its complications, um, as you start to spread your wings as an as an adult. But any girlfriend that I'd spoken to who might have understood similar issues said, once you have a child or once you get pregnant, that relationship with your mother just amplifies more than you could even expect. And it did just that I sort of understood my mother in a way. I never had my whole life, and how she could be there for me. I had an incredibly high risk pregnancy. I was on um mandatory bed rest my entire first trimester, and I had a many scares in my second trimester, and how she rose to the occasion for me, it was just incredible. Is Jonathan here now? He just arrived. So so, Jonathan, you have now just entered the river. You've you've you've jumped into a running river. Because Leah was starting to discuss the pandemic and the isolation with her mom that her mom has been with her, and I realized that the best example of a good friend really is a mother who suits up, shows up, sticks by their child as they carry, deliver, and then care for a child. And so we started recording Well it just felt like such an organic, perfect way to talk about it. And then um, she explained that really her mother and you, Jonathan Groff, are her best friends. And now you're here. It's just it's the way the Good Friend Podcast. We just roll with it. Can you see me? Dad? Oh? Yeah, can you see can you see him? No? I saw him briefly, Um, yeah that and will tell you about that. So if I don't think he's ever called me Leah. And when he says Leah, but it feels like I'm being scolded or something. Okay, so what I'm sorry? What is your word for her? Jonathan? This is really funny because it's it's in tune with the mother. As I'm jumping into the river on the in the Mother discussion, Leah and I call each other mom and dad. It started. It started during spring weekening Remy's aching. One of the cast members started calling us mom and dad because we, I guess assumed the mother father figures in certain ways with the with the cast, with the company. And then now for fifteen years, we're calling each other mom and dad. Okay, well I'm I'm hey mom, Mommy. By the way, my people, if you ever see I will post something, I will say, well, mommy is very happy Mommy of the Mommy is talking to mom and dad. And by the way, this is another Obviously, when I conceived the idea of doing a podcast about friendship, um, something so crucial during this last very challenging time in all of our lives, I you know, obviously conceived it thinking Okay, I'll call it and I'll call up you know, you just start thinking of the friends that you have that you would call. And there were people I reached out to who turned me down. By the way, I'm just saying, here's my I'm going to do my radio voice for a minute. I I completely understand that people would turn me down. And honestly, somebody said me, well, why would they do it? Like who are you? Like? Really, who are you to why would they turn you down? That's no, no, no. The opposite, which is simply these are busy people. And you know, it's that thing where I'm so enthusiastic in my heart is so open that I'm just like a puppy. I'm like, yeah, I mean, Leon knows I'm I'm a bit of a cheerleader. So I'm like, come on, let's do it. Let's put on a show together. And you know, I got a couple of lovely, sort of respectful declines, and it was it was really ego centering for me to go, oh right, right. So anyway, the fact is there are some people that I have never met on this podcast, and you are my first stranger, and I'm and I love that our strange meeting happened in the way it has with Leah beginning to talk about being a new mom her mom, I'm thrilled that the two of you have joined me. Oh my gosh, I've said for so long because Jamie, you've texted me about Jonathan for a while, you know, when you watched Hamilton's and always like tell your friends were you in Hamilton's. Oh wow, Well we'll have to talk and we'll have to yeah briefly, yeah, but maybe memorably. Maybe we'll talk about that um or maybe not um. For the listener, Leah will be playing the part of mom and Jonathan will be playing the part of dad, and I will, I guess be mommy so super confused, sorry, Mom, continue. I just I felt for a very long time that wants you to meet. I know you will love each other, like I just have had such a strong feeling I have such a Jonathan for so long too, Like you just have to meet Ja l C. And when you do, um, I just know that you two will also become good friends. Well, hey, thank you by the way, for the For the person who's not watching, because this is a podcast, so you're listening. Leah, just I mean, mom, just did the mom just did the thing where you hold your hands up to your face in that kind of poesy way. Um, because she threw in the good friend, like, because she's a highly paid professional. Branding is everything. You've got a brand and brand. I'm grateful for your branding moment um. So Dad, I'm not gonna I'm not gonna get over. It's just gonna just get used to it, bab because mommy mommy, and you know, we'll discuss the mommy of it all. So is it true that you two did meet on the Spring Awakenings of it All? Or did you know each other before? No, we met at our audition first Spring Awakening. I had done previous workshops of the show prior to Jonathan joining the cast, and they were auditioning for you know, his part, And um, here comes this boy from Lancaster, Pennsylvania with more gel in should be legal one of those um books that my son plays with that like makes those I love, And you know how much I love that book. I've been playing with with him with that book right with the crinkly paper that makes crinkolicea And of course he had a gelled quaff and and I remember being in the audition with him and just taking a liking to Jonathan and I couldn't have the city mouse, he was the country mouse. And um, but I just it's also a book series, by the way, and I just refer saying to myself, like, oh, this poor sweet boy from Lancaster, Pennsylvania, like I'm going to help him and take him under my wing. And fast forward fifteen years and he's in like the Matrix series and he's been in every iconic hit for the past ten years now. And Jonathan is just has rose to such incredible stardom that he's so so deserves and you fell to such horrible depths and it's such you know what. Honestly, I felt like this was my way of kind of pulling you up from from the bottom of your talent pool and say come on, um, mom, you can do it too, you know. Yeah, And but just by the way, and um, for the listener, as you know, I am not We're not here to sell things. Um, I'm here to have a conversation. And you know, obviously people's work is going to come up in it. But I need to tell you something. I don't know how mom, I saw a clip or it must have been a YouTube thing or somebody sent me, so you know, how do we get these things into our phones? Things arrive on your phone, you go what and you click on it and it was you doing a monologue from Scream Queens. And for those who have not watched Scream Queens, which I guess is available on some platform, the comic snark that comes up this woman. It was so delightful to behold this just wickedly funny um kind of I'm not going to say, kind of totally deranged human um with this kind of weird just it was a great performance, but it it was so funny because I hadn't watched it. Obviously, I don't sit around, you know. Can you imagine Chris Guest with me going like, oh honey, I'm just watching screen. I just started if like was born, so I thought i'd watch my old mark. You can only imagine how that would go in my house. Anyway, I was reminded of that. I don't even know where I know, I know right, because you were the dregs of your career while Jonathan or while dad has risen um, so you met and made did did the bond? I'm hearing a theme. I wonder if you guys are going to add onto it that when you met, you knew did did it happen quickly or did it happen over a period of time. I have I really remember of that audition for Spring Awakening, and I remember Leah coming over and introducing herself, and I felt incredibly intimidated because Leah had done three Broadway shows I think at that point Lima's ragtime Fiddler, and I was very green and she was very experienced. And I remember, like we had to audition. We can get into in a minute to just how intense the relationship our relationship got because of the subject matter of Spring Awakening. But in this audition, we had to do a scene where we were I was beating her with a stick and she I remember her at the audition before going in, her saying, here's this pencil. Used this pencil as the prop, but don't actually hit me with it. But what we're doing the scene, you can. She was sort of like helping me, and even at that stage and are the very first day that we met, sort of saying, you know, the director is gonna want to see this, but he's not gonna want to see you hit me. But she kind of was taking me by the hand and sort of teaching me the ropes from the very first day we met. And then the other first memory I have is after our first day of rehearsal, on the way out, her saying to me, just so you know, we're gonna be lifelong friends. I could cry right now. I know you know what do cry? By the way, this is a crying site website. This is our podcast web this what is it? It's a podcast? I know with this. I'm a movie actress. So you know we're not on camera. Nobody else see you cry, but they'll hear you. She said that. She said, yeah, she took my hand and she was like, just so you know, like we're gonna be We're gonna be friends forever. And I remember feeling scared. This is how I felt. I was like, I was like, who is this person? Like how does she know? I felt very green, Like she said, it was a country mouse, city mouse. We were polar opposites. I was closeted, I was not out of the class. I was gay. I had a boyfriend who was my roommate. Leah was this very kind of extremely talented, extremely professional, extremely outgoing, experienced young person, and I was the total opposite. I had some raw ability, but I had no finesse, and I had no idea how things worked. Uh, and I was not comfortable even in a very sort of like important way, with who I was. And we spent the next two years doing this incredibly intimate, sexual, emotional, deep show that were like the the art of it, the acting of it was incredibly challenging and incredibly difficult and then professional We were nominated for awards and the show became really successful, and we we rode this wave of success together. So it was this work that was incredibly challenging and intimate combined with this sort of life changing experience. The show was for both of us, and so we were getting this creative back kind we did. We do scenes where we're like crying looking at each other and making out with each other with tongue and dry humping each other. And in my in my best man speech at Leah's wedding, I had done the math and he was like, I forget how many thousands of times we had simulated sex together. It's a lot of times. And and all those things combined created created this lifelong bond that that we then, like now has grown and development and evolved. But from that first day of rehearsal, Leah, as usual as she's known to do, saw it and called it. She's really good at doing that. Can I say something please, Although I'm going to tell you one thing, I think this will be the only podcast in history and we may win an award for it where my guests discuss simulating sex more than any other people in the history of show business. In the best man speech, I think I think in that very tiny category we have one. I would dust off your you know, fancy suit because I think we're going to that for most weird intimate share. We haven't even started yet. Okay, well, but I think we now know who the winner is, so I'm sorry, mom. Continue. He also included in that speech that then when we went on to work on Glee together, our characters got married and had a baby together. So the stimulated sex from Spring Awakening then grew into then actual baby and on Glee. But we'll get into that. But I have to say I have such a um, I have such a specific memory with Jonathan groff Um of us. It was very early into the rehearsal process of Spring awakening and and for my memory, our relationship, it went from zero to a million very quickly. I mean we were working on stage together intimately all night, and then we would go to each other's houses. I would go to his apartment the minute the show was over. He would take a long time at the stage door with signing autographs and stuff, and I would I would go faster and meet him at home and wait for him at his apartment and wait for him to just be with me after the show and sleep in his bed sometimes. But I have this memory of a little earlier, at just the beginning of our relationship. We went to the moment I think to see some Edward Monk exhibit that was there. And um, I have a very strong personality that I know. That's the other big board winning revelation. I got it out of her. Wow, I'm so excited. That is not true, mom, It's an acquired taste. UM. I remember early on, I knew that Jonathan was gay and was in the closet, and I knew that his roommate was not just his room. And I knew all these things. You know, I lived in New York my whole life, and um, and I remember asking him at this museum. I was like, so, do you have like a you know, girlfriend or boyfriend or something. And he was like, no, no, no, no no, know I I I don't have a girlfriend. I don't have a girlfriend. I'm single, you know. And and I was like, oh, you know. He's like, yeah, I'm I'm in love with Jennifer Gardner and I love her. He's the love of my life and that's like who I want to be with. And I was like, okay, and I know, and I knew in my mind. I was like, oh wow, this is um, this is deep. And I remember in that moment feeling like I needed to protect him from how I could be. And I felt in this immediate like I knew, I heard myself in my head just be like you have to be good right now, Leah. You can't be brass and you can't be hard. You know, you can't push, and you can't be like, oh, you don't like Jennifer Gartner like you know, of course, yeah, you just want to you want to be Jennifer Gardner. I just at that time, but I remember feeling this extreme, this in immediate protection to protect him, but also to check myself and and I never once asked him if he was gay. I just in that moment, I was like this, I just have to respect him in this moment and go along with him, and follow along with Jonathan and his comfort level, and and I'll just sleep fine. But honestly not to get weepy yet, although I have already cried, um, because of that moment of precious truth and respect that you knew not to betray with your natural enthusiasm and you're no bullshit way that you knew that he was figuring it out, and whether or not you knew it the old adages you don't know it until you know it, and that you had to give him that space and that level of trust and respect for somebody else's process is honestly the greatest good friend, um attribute because obviously people are going to listen to this and be like thinking about their friends. And I think recognizing something in someone and not forced feeding it into them and letting them loving them through it is really what happened, is you loved him through it and at whatever point, which is none of my business, um Um. It might be some other investigative journalists business who would be like dig and deep wanting to know what that moment was. I'm not that person, but restaurante on the corner ninth and he sat me down and appropriately, I guess and the um, my roomies are just my roommate. I'm gay, but I'm not going to go beyond like a gay Pride float or anything like that. And then literally six months later he was on an actual float. Yes, yes, five years later, but close. Yes. So it was so beautiful and we were actually going that night to see Spring Awakening together for the first time after seeing the show, and it was a simple moment and it didn't have some long, dramatic, deep thing. It was like someone just said, you know, it was I feel like at that point our friendship was so beyond what Jonathan's sexual preferences. It's it just at that point it was like, you know, um, I knew I know Jonathan and every cell, every bit of him, and you know, it's so it was just, um, you know, I was so happy that he just in his life was there. As far as telling me, um, and you're and jail c slash mommy, you're you're so right to say, like I want to, I want to back you up on that thing of Leah really gave me the greatest gift for because that moment did happen, but it was two years later. But that such a gift and we and we had we were doing this show where, you know, in the midst of myself trying to come to terms with who I was and and kind of compartmentalizing who I was in my apartment and being with my boyfriend but us being completely closeted, and then coming to the theater there it was. It was so complet lex to fall in love with Leah every night and and really feel love. I mean, and this is our this is this is like the complexity I think of relationships as well that I was also trying to kind of figure out and play out. And the show kind of gives any kid that ever does Spring Awakening the opportunity to play off these feelings and emotions. It's the great gift of that show being created is to give you know, young adults complex materials to work through what they're feeling. But I would you know, Leah and I had real love for each other, and because of what we got to do in that show, we fell in love and we we we bonded and we connected and sort of like what you were saying, Leah, that like, by the time I came out to you, you knew me so intimately that it was almost like I knew that you knew that I knew. But we had this thing that we were also experiencing with each other that was so profound and so deep and so meaningful and so unique to us that there was it was like the coming out wasn't like, um, and now I'm out and now we can be friends. It was like I came out, but it was an acknowledgement of the gift that she had given me for the last two years to explore and to be complicated and to not be defined by one thing, which is like the best, the best gift of friend can ever give you is to let you be whoever you are at whatever moment you are, and feel freedom to be multiple things at one time. Okay, just so you know, that's what we will call the poll quote for the like that will be just so you know, that will be on Instagram. What you just said, that distillation of what a friend is will be the poll quote. I'm saying you could leave now something I'll get if I'm a good friend We'll be right back with more good friend after this quick break. Don't have you guys ever gotten in a big fight? Oh yeah, that's separated, that gave you some distance from each other kind of fight or just a fight that needed to get worked out in the moment. Well, okay, I want to just say one thing very I want to talk about the fight. I want to say one thing to go really quickly. And you know the thing is that we were just what we were just talking about two And you know, Jonathan and I have had so many um lives together. We were in Spring Awakening together, and then because of Jonathan, they wrote Glee for Jonathan and I to play Finn and Rachel together, Jonathan and up coming back on later in the show and play another character. We did that show together. We've had lots of different lives together, and um, in my worst moment of life, Jonathan was by my side for months and he came to live with me. And it's interesting because I don't even think of him being there for me in that moment that was the biggest moment. As much as I think of these little moments that we had together, and these these little moments in time that could have changed so many different things, So the meaning of a friend I'm actually just trying to get the quote here. I'm trying, But what I'm saying is it's the big moment, but it's also those little things along the way in our friendship that even surpassed the the being there for each other in the in the biggest moments. Um. But back to the fights. I was just curious. I've loved it. I've not had you know, this experience. I well, I could tell you too of our the only two fights we've ever had. And by the way, I'm not looking to break you guys up and have you getten some big fight. These are strangers and they are taking from this, hopefully some insights about good friends. But you know, you can share in a general way. Maybe your fight I don't want to know. I think that they were always me being dramatic and ridiculous, you know. I I just if I could be more like Jonathan with his kindness and patience. Um I I mean, I'm sure a lot of people are like, how does he put up with you? And how does he deal with you? Because he's the most loving, kind, generous person who has more friends than you know the whole world. It's like, talk about the fights, talk about the fights. I. I actually thought she was going to break into song there for a minute, I I. And by the way, I did not invite you to on to sing. I' comrad to see you again. Yes, we had an argument because Jonathan was nominated for a Tony Award and I did not get a Tony Award combination. And I was very upset, and it's the eternal debate amongst the two of us that he didn't call me that morning, and he says he did call me, and UM, I was very upset because I just I just thought I would hear from him when I didn't get the nomination, even though UM a huge incredible moment and morning for him of being nominated for his first Tony Award, I was very upset that he didn't call me. Um. Although he says that he did call me. This is and see, I'm sorry, this is really going to break us up. Else I'm starting this, you're starting that now. I'm starting to feel it's starting to be like, wait a second, that's not what I said. I'm starting to get into that mode. And this really is. It's so funny because this comes up, I would say probably twice a year. This is the fight that will just always be the fight. Cool fight though. The date you were nominated for a Tony Leah, okay, the night before, I'm going to take it back a little bit to call me the night thank you, but the night before. But I think this is a cute detail. There was this there's the actors. Is it called the Actor's Chapel that's across the street from the Eugene O'Neill Theater. Yes, it's on forty nine between eighth and ninth. It's a beautiful church that is so wonderful and diverse and opens its stores to every It's just it's an amazing and they would play there's no business like show business every day at half hour, yeah before and so every day we would hear the chimes of this church. So yeah, so this is so this particular night. It's before the Tonys were what two years old, you're one years old, you might be twenty. Yet we're like, oh, you know, we want so badly to get nominated for the Tony's and you know, and we take um offerings in our costumes. So this quick little break during the show and when we were not on stage and in our costumes. We would leave the theater while the show was going on, and we would we ran across the street to this church and I was like, we have to pray to nominate for Tony's. I brought like five dollars and John brought fifty. And then I'm like, I'll never forgetting putting the money in the best and I was like, wait a second, and anyways, he gave a lot of money, and and Leah said to me that night, she was like, you know what, Because Leah loves to plan, and she loves especially when things are like very heightened, you know, and then it's a lot of emotions or whatever. The way that she deals with that is by being like, Okay, here's what's going to happen. If it goes this way, this is what I'm gonna do, and if it goes this way, this is what I'm gonna do. And she's sort of like creates a schedule of how she'll handle whatever outcome. Is that correct? I would say that's kind of correct, yes, And so that night she was like, if tomorrow morning when my mom and I wait, I said, your mom was staying at your house that night. My brother was staying at my apartment, me and Cody's apartment that night, and she was like, I'm gonna wake up, I'm gonna watch you with my mom. And if I don't get a nomination, I'm just going to turn off my phone and I'm gonna go shopping and just pretend like nothing happened. And is away we go. And I was like, okay, so when and and I what I remember. It's so funny that we're walking through the detest. This I remember, it's so funny. So I remember I was like, Okay, she doesn't get nominated. The que is this is also my sort of level of ignorance at that age of you know, the queue that I take is it doesn't happen. She wants to pretend like it doesn't exist. Great, got it, That's what I thought in my in my mind. The discrepancy that I don't remember, but Leah remembers is that she called me and left me a message to say, congratulations, you're nominated for Tony. That's so great. On my side, I don't recall the voice smell Leah is like I called the next night, is like I called you, and you didn't call me back, and I was like, I didn't get your voicemail. And that was where that is like the the discrepancy, like the thing that we'll never know in the lure of our friendship, make love in the show together multiple times, and here I am like, he's kissing me, and I'm like not looking at him. Oh, yes, I forgot about Oh my gosh, yes, that's the best part, having like a fight but still making love. But I wouldn't look at him. And it was a very short lived argument. And uh and but again I stand by the fact that as a uh, you know, an iconic theater couple, you know, performers, this is the most beautiful um fight to ever have. Based on Tony nominations, I I I forgot. That's the best part is that coming to the theater the next night and I was like Hiliah and she was like just like not not talking to me. And then an intermission I came into your dressing room and I burst into tears and I was like, why are you looking at me? This should be a celebratory moment. We did this together. And then you were like I called you and you never called me. And then we were lasted a day and was the show nominated. Also, we wont eight Tony Awards. Yes you did, but you didn't, Leah Ne Okay, that's what we call a good friend. See, I knew I needed to do this exactly. This is the moment. Wow, that's such a story. I just you know, it's funny because we all have our way. This is apropos of nothing, obviously and has nothing to do with friendship, but we all have our way of responding to stress and anger and feelings. And Leah and I think are very similar people. And it's funny because when I'm mad, I can't look at somebody, and for me, it's that pretending they don't exist, and that for me, not looking at you means you're invisible. Like I'm i am everything, I'm tactile, and i'm i'm hands and I'm but like all of my senses are like super attuned. But when I'm angry, because I can't use my words, what happens is I shut down. Shutting down is to say you don't exist. I will pretend, and it's a little it's it's I will pretend that I'm here alone, and you know, I'll reach by I mean, obviously we're talking about my husband. Am I in relationship with for thirties six years? Got you? Um? Yeah, I know, married six just not even have a moment of appreciation for Jamie Lee Curtis at the Golden Globes strutting in in that yellow dress. I think I saw, um someone posted something on Instagram and if I could have the confidence of Jamie Lee Curtis walking on the stage one minute in my life that things would be better. And I just I've never been more proud to be your friend or to just in that moment. I mean, I was staring at your breast the whole time. I wanted to lay my head on this. Okay, well the really good news is mommy there. Yeah, thank you. That's very sweet of you. Um. Yes, I was talking about my husband and obviously I you know, I just I don't do well with that. And that's why I asked about friend fights, because you know, when you're when you're on a podcast talking about good friendship, it it has to come up because people can't be like, oh, yeah, we've never had a disagreement and you just go will it? How is that possible? And so the older I get and the more sober I am, and all of a sudden, the feelings that used to scare the heck out of me and make me feel like if I ever had feelings that it would kill me, and I now know that isn't the case. So for me, it's just interesting because of of your friendship and wondering. That's just an amazing, amazing story. And I feel like one of the things that I learned to about Leah in that moment that that I hold on to is that this this quality of planning as the friend of the person that plans, understanding that the and the planning is a therapeutic way to deal with stress and to deal with emotion, and it's can be an incredibly healthy and productive way to handle whatever uncertainty is happening in the moment. It does not mean that these plans are the plans that will happen when the next day comes that but this was such a good lesson to learn of, Like, Okay, we're planning something out for ourselves right now, but this may not be the but when the moment actually comes, the moment itself may require exactly what the plan was, or it may require something completely different. And so having perspective and sort of malleability in that in that plan is something that I then always took with me in in in every relationship after that. But I think that also like the the the an interesting thing that happened in our friendship that I think was essential is we were together simulating sex so close, like sweating on each other like like we would we we like like if I can say, just to speak one more time about this period of spring awakening, we would like like like wrestle, we would bully like like we would like pin each other down and like physical with each other and were very confused by because it was I'm sorry to interrupt you, John, Uh, it was very physical like we were we were so um, I don't, I mean, you're You're way more eloquent than I. Please keeps no no. And I remember, like I remember Naya on what when we were like in rehearsal one day drink clee. She was like, there's no way the two of you are her asked or whatever. We just had this like but we weren't but we but we had. What we had. It was the most like incestuous close, like it was so raw that I really think that One of the one great moment of transition that happened sort of organically kind of um when I think back in retrospect, is we had some distance and it was sort of like being in college or something together and then being a part and we had this kind of moment where Leah moved to l A and I was staying in New York, and it was really in retrospect now, it wasn't even occurring to me in the moment, but it was so good for our friendship because we were so we were almost too close with the level of closeness couldn't sustain relationships. And so when we had this physical distance that sort of just happened because of your career and Lee and all of that, it created space that I think is really important in in all relationships. But in perspective, it helped us some. It helped our relationship mature a lot too, because you know, like Jonathan said, we we had this very college like experience in Spring Awakening where we were so so intertwined morning in and night, working together, going home with each other, spending the days together, our families became good friends. We would spend weekends together, days off everything, and then we had this distance, and we um grew up, and Jonathan's career, you know, blew up, and and and my career you know blew up, and it was like, uh, you know, but the distance forced us to maintain that level of friendship. And I think that that's also when you really know who is meant to stay in your life. It's like when life changes and when there's distance, do you keep you know, in contact with the part, do you do keep that level of we we did, and it helped us kind of sure, Um, but it also forced us to maintain the relationship with all these other things happening, you know, in in life. And then our relationship went from this. So I can kind of compare it when we were in Spring Awakening. It is like when two people are young people fall in love and it's like that lust, like just that like I am upset. It was deeper than lust, um, but it was like that so obsessive I love you. And then when we were on Glee together and then, you know, especially when like Corey passed, Um, our friendship became that grounded two soul mates, just that like a real beyond the wrestling and the you know, it just turned into something that is life long, not that it wasn't in Awakening, but it took on a level of maturity and deepness and just like I can now go you know, and see him when I see him or whatever, and it's like there is a connection to Jonathan that is Um, they will never go away. Now it just became like cemented. I know I'll get if I'm a good friend. We'll be right back with more good friend after this quick break, so stick around. I don't I know I'll get if I'm a good friend. I don't know. You know all of the planning that you and by the way, and I share, but I you know, that's part of in friendships. I'm not great at telling people what I feel about I'm I struggle, honestly with with words about it. I find writing letters very challenging. I have It's like a weird thing with my mother. My mother used to write letters, but I didn't believe them, and so it felt like words are cheap and actions speak louder. Actions speak louder, and so I am a woman of action. UM, and my hope is that my action speaks louder than the words that I could possibly put together. Um. And at the same time of all of that planning, Uh, life happens and Uh there's a book and I've mentioned it on this podcast before and but it's important to me. It's a book called Special Topics and Calamity Physics, which is a novel by Marichia Pessel. It's just a terrific novel, mystery novel if you're looking for a great book. But in the middle of it, she talks, the main character talks about, you know, life is supposed to be, Um, what you plan? You know, you where you go to school, what happens your first job, dead dead and the dead end? Then you meet eat and you do spring awake, and like that's how it's supposed to go. And she says it isn't you know? She says life hinges on a couple of seconds you never see coming, and what you decide and do in those seconds determines everything from then on. And you won't know what you're going to do until you're there. And I remember when I read that and then thought back to my life and the very hard things, really hard, horrible things that have happened that I never saw coming, but that transformed my life because of the way I responded to them, and that's kind of what you were just saying, Mom, was that moment for you of such grief and so, I mean, addicts, it's hard not to, you know, understand that they're on a on a dangerous path, let's say. But no matter what, you still don't see it coming. And you know, I knew you guys were friends, and obviously that takes it from as you said, the sort of wrestling kind of energy together and really becomes so human. It's just such a human experience to go through together. And you know, the way you spoke of Mom was really very moving. Um, that's why I popped in my head. Um. And then of course children, I love. I love the woman who's planning this and that. And I just kept sitting back here like, yeah, you just had a kid. Yeah, and I see everything is white. Okay, wait wait. I love all my friends who have children, and their palates are you know, kind of wide and crew and I love it. And I cannot wait for the day that they bring home a Fisher Price plastic box that's bright yellow, red green, and that they dragon and like, mommy, mommy, look I got I love I Minuto, I love manu JOI and you're just shaking because it's so not gonna work. No, I'm there already, I meanterly. My like I my pediatrition was like, you should just clean the baby at the beginning of the feeding and the end of the feeding. You don't have to clean through up the meal. Because I was like, Okay, when you have a fifteen year long friendship, now you go through um, breakups, lost success. Um. I got married. Jonathan was there for my wedding. Uh. I never thought I would have a pregnancy that he wasn't by my side for the entire time, but because of COVID we were separated. Um. But then you know, the minute that I was able to get to the East Coast and see Jonathan, the quarantined got multiple tests and we're able to see each other. And I hadn't seen john in probably a year. The last time I saw Jonathan was we had just filmed the Jimmy Fallon Show together. We went out for dinner that night, had many a cocktail together, and I woke up the next morning and took a pregnancy test and found out I was PREGNANTY. I hadn't seen him for an entire year and he walked in the door of the nursery and I was breastfeeding my son, and it was so weird because Jonathan has seen me without clothes on more of times maybe than my husband, um, and and like I just remember feeling like uncomfortable and like a little nervous um and also like like when did we grow up? And did it happen? And and it was it was we. I have these sort of like these moments that flash in front of my eyes with Jonathan and I, I would say, like the first time we met winning the Tony's first Spring Awakening and this you know, I ended up visiting him in Los Angeles, um, which is a wild story of fate, and that's how I met Ryan Murphy and that's how Glee was created. So I have these flashes of moments in time in our relationship, and then that moment of him walking in with the breast even though I was like, this is my son, and like, it was so intense. It was really intense, filled with a lot of emotions that I'm still just processed. Yeah, of course you are. And do you remember that, mom and Jonathan ord right, Yeah, I cried. I just walked in and felt overcome with emotion seeing her, and and then I sat on the floor at your feet and just it was like trying to compute. I felt simplearly. Only other time I felt the say he was with my brother when he had his first child. Feeling like, Okay, you're a parent, You're a parent, You're a parent. This is, on one hand, feels like the most natural. And and Leah is such a mom's mom. She's such a mom, has always been. I always knew that when she had a kid, and since the day I met you, has always talked about winning a child. Mama Who Bore Me was the first song she sings that spring away to ing. It was like, obviously always at the front of every conversation we had throughout the years, what it would be like this guy you're dating, but is he the father of your children? You know, there's always the conversation about the kids and the family and will this be the debt? Will this be the dad? You know, we're kind of looking for like the real dad, not even necessarily the husband, but like who's the dad because it's always been a means to an end for the kid, and now here is that is the child? And so it feels natural, and yet it feels so strange to compute, like everything is different, everything is different, like everything now is as it it makes so much sense, and you really feel like before this and after this, like as many things as we experience, ties and lows and grief and success, this to me is like even like wedding. Yes, but it's like boom, all of a sudden, there is a there is a human being in the room. And now to me, that's at least what I felt like. Now everything is different. It was of course many different evolutions, and this is now the whole beginning of an entirely new, an entirely new experience, and I feel like so excited to be the gay uncle ever. Well. And I spoke to my friend Naomi Phoner yesterday and she is the parent of Maggie and Jake jollen holl and I am the non gayther of um of her kids, even though it's not an official god parent position, but apparently it is according to the internet. UM. I believe, I believe everything that I read on the internet. UM. But the reason I bring it up is that the reason I brought that up is because I've become friends with Maggie and Jake separate, and so what I was thinking of possibility for you that you will actually be able to be a good friend to ever to ever in your own relationship, not just in the connect the dot back to to mom. And I hope for you that you get that because the friendships I have made now as an adult with the adult children of my friends separate from their parents has been really uh An added, is the whole idea spring awakening. We want to spring is about renewal and growth and change and death and life, and um, that is what you hope. I will tell you. It's such a wonderful way of looking at a friendship. And I am beyond grateful to the two of you, and I'm not and I do not want. But it's funny because, um, I you know this show was born from a song. I don't know if you had a chance to listen to the song it's on your email. Loved it so good. That is literally the birth of this show was me hearing that song, going, oh, um, I love I love her anyway. I've always um and you know I've been listening to you know, I do listen to show tunes, and I you know, there are so many songs about friendship, and I was listening. I don't know if you've heard it recently, and if you haven't, I'm going to urge everybody to listen to it. Easy to be hard from here, Lynn Kellogg Jonathan knows, Okay, I'm I'm obsessed with it, you know, because how can they ignore their friends? I mean, I just I sob and I've been listening to it on repeat, doing these podcasts and you know, at home, I'm just so it's funny because here I have two people and just so you know, I can't sing. Um. I can do many things. I could build a house. I if you want me to build a house, I could build a house. I can do almost anything. I never thought I would do any of the things I do, ever, and I do them all, and I do them well. And that's just my gift. I just sort of say, oh you need that, Okay, I can do that, and boom, we're doing it. We're doing this right now. Never in a billion years would I have thought of doing this, and now I'm doing it. But the one thing I cannot do is sing, and and I I'm telling you I can not sing. So the idea that I am talking to the two of you, two people who both I admire as friends, I admire for your art. Man, I mean, I just it's such a gift. Thank you so much for doing this. You've You've made a beautiful episode of the good Friend podcast, and anybody listening, stay safe, God bless you and whatever. Bye, Thank you for having guess. Good Friend is produced by Dylan Fagin and is a production of I Heart Radio. Our theme song, good Friend is written, produced, and performed by Emily King. Unlogative from a good Friend, Don't Already From a good Friend. For more podcasts from my heart Radio, visit the I heart Radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.