Bonus: Dani's Listening, Episode 1

Published Jul 22, 2021, 1:00 PM

In this new bonus series, “Dani’s Listening”, Dani connects with listeners by responding to those who’ve called in to share their family secrets.

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Family Secrets is a production of I Heart Radio. Danny's Listening is a bonus series brought to you by Family Secrets. Hi, thanks for welcoming a place to share my family secret. In two thousand eighteen, when I was forty six years old, I completed a genetic test gifts from my father in law. What I learned from that test was mind blowing and at the same time not all that shocking because I grew up with an alcoholic mother. I learned that the dad who raised me was not my biological father. But with my parents were deceased at this time, so I couldn't ask them any questions. I quickly became an investigator, scouring the Internet for information for days weeks. Ultimately I succeeded, and I've learned the identity of my biological father and to half sisters, all alive still in a small town where I was born. My biological father, still married to his wife, denies the relationship with my other mother besides a one time thing, and he has no interest in knowing me. My stepmother, who's still alive, shared all that she knew with me. She shared that the dad who raised me knew I was not his child and stopped my mother from getting an abortion, telling her that he would raise me as his own and no one would have to know the truth. He only shared this with my stepmother before they were married, and told her and no one else. This process has been strange on a lot of individuals I never knew I was related to. Some embraced me and encouraged me on my journey, and many became angry, defensive, and protective of their truth. Ironically, for the last fifteen years I've worked as a marriage and family therapist, I've always been really interested in the pathic of other people's family stories and journeys. Now I and myself graveling with my own. I think I've always been searching for my true story and identity. Thanks again for a chance to share a bit about this journey. I gain a lot of comfort and confidence in my own emotions by listening to you and your listeners, So thank you. Right. Hi, it's Danny, and I'm very touched by what you shared, and you took the time to call in. Several things struck me about your story. First, as you said that you weren't entirely shocked, even though your mind was blown by what you discovered. I felt that way too, when I discovered the truth of my identity. It's like there was always something there, something not quite apprehendable, because how could it be, as kids were formed by what the adults around us tell us, and we have no reason to believe otherwise, and yet when something doesn't add up, we feel it. I wonder if this is what led you, unconsciously, of course, to become a marriage and family therapist. I mean, my god, that is just so perfect. When I'm most moved by is what you shared about your father, the man who raised you. He sounds like he was a very loving person, and he's the reason you're here. I feel much that way about my own dad, even though my story is different from yours. When these stories crash into our lives, the ones that have always been lurking there, the people involved behave in all sorts of ways. As you said, some are kind, some are angry, some are terrified, Some reach out of hand, and others slam the door. You say you've always been searching for your true identity. Now you know far more than you ever did, and that knowledge, though it is indeed strange, will lead you to even greater wholeness over time. I hope you can draw from your deep well of empathy and direct some of that empathy towards yourself. I'll be thinking of you, and I wish you joy and much peace. If you have a family secret story you'd like to share on Danny's Listening, please call eight eight eight Secret zero. That's eight eight S E C R E T and the number zero

Family Secrets

Family Secrets. We all have them. And while the discovery of family secrets can initially be terrify 
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