Nate hit rock bottom last night when he was shoveling icing from the can in his mouth.
Get your hairs together and we're going to start to party. In the start.
I'm ready to party.
The Elvis duran After Party.
Here we go, the fifteen minute morning show podcast. We got a house.
Not that it's not that.
Oh that's right. If you look at the neon behind me, it's the Elvis Duranz after Party. Hey, I stand corrected, Thank you, Nate. Let's see who OL's here. There's Scottie b in the Serial Killers podcast room.
Yes it is.
And of course I didn't know if they changed the name of their podcast as well.
Yeah.
And there's a Gandhi who's going through her purse looking for something and they're scary.
Hi.
Hello, And of course Garrett is here, and there's Danielle and there's a name. Hey. Can we talk about the cookies I brought in today? Yeah, thanks for our friends at Cookies for Kids Cancer. I received this incredible gift over the holidays, a gift of cookies, right, so I knew if I left them at home, I'd eat each and every one of them. So I brought them in so you could eat each and every one of them.
Well.
As you know, if you've been following along, Nate has been I've given up sugar. Nate gave up sugar, and which is a good thing to do? Sugar as poison, as they say, yes, But in giving up sugar, everyone here is looking out for Nate, and every time they see him with a cookie in their hand, they run up to him and slap his hand, physically attacking it.
He asks for it, he wants it, Yeah, he says.
I do because I can't control myself.
Well, encourage your sugar.
I'm sorry what.
I encourage your sugar? I'm not slapping anything out of your.
Hand, almost like a dealer.
Okay, I'm gonna encouraged sugar. I'm not encouraging sugar. But this morning I opened the cookie thing and he reaches in and grabs a cookie, and I'm thinking, should I slap his hand like everyone else does? No, No, he's a grown man. He can make his own decisions. Let me kill myself with sugar. So you think I should have slept your hair?
No, you were right. You were correct because you just let me make my own mistakes. Right. I had a problem. You know what I did last night?
What'd you do?
I didn't have any cookies or sweets or anything in the house.
So you just said a spoonful of sugar.
I did, because I was digging through the cabinet, you did. I found an old jar of frosting. Oh my god, and I dug the spoon in and I was eating frosting.
Been there, I've done it.
And wait, this was last night. This I'm giving up. I've given up sugar.
I don't think he's made it one day.
He's addicted.
I'm addicted.
I'm not even kidding someone addicted to sugar A little bit.
Sugar has addictive quality.
That is, it's physiological. It's not psychological. It really you.
Your body needs it and craves it. It has nothing to do with with your brain.
So honestly, it's hard to overcome sugar unless sugar has everything to do with your brain. What I'm saying is what you said, when sugar, When sugar vacates the body for like forty eight hours, that's when you don't crave it anymore.
I can't give forty eight minutes.
Do you remember that Clavn guy on Cheers that I always had? Yeah, you're the Cliff Craven of our morning.
That guys, where's his facts? Correcting agains some sugar Cliffs were mostly correct. Okay, but yeah, I am fully one. I literally was sucking the frosting out of this.
Temptation. Yeah, so I've got this cookie.
I got it really looked good.
I like the tin, I said, the penguins looked like earlier.
Yeah, you like that to look like. I haven't had that one.
What are you eating sugar cookies?
Look, he's leaning in his nose.
I've already had three of them and I haven't.
What How do you How could you have come in here five minutes ago and said, you know, I gave him sugar.
I did just that.
I had three cookies.
To sugar says the last time he had a cookie exactly.
The problem with his request is he did ask you, well, don't let me do it, guys, if you see it, don't let me do it. So then people took him seriously and said, I'm gonna be a good friend, and he will wrestle you. You try to take a cookie from him, he'll take you down.
We've all seen these these these movies of these people that have heroin addiction, and they literally have to be strapped down. And that's what needs to happen to me. I need to be in a padded room, strapped to a chair and left alone for three days.
He says to me. Also, because you know his birthday is coming up this week.
Sorry, heavy birthday, he says to me. He says to me, do me a favor. Don't get me any Krispy cremes or anything. I don't want to answer. Do you want fruit? No?
No, okay, okay, just give me one birthday Wait, one Krispy cream, I said, dude.
The rest of the people in this room want Krispy Creams as well. I'm like, so you're I'm gonna get a whole box.
Oh no, hold on. But for Garrett, who can't eat gluten or sugar sugar, I'm good. You're always you always. Nate can have my donuts, but.
I always get him an ice cream cake because Garrett always says, get me an ice cream cake. And we do that, and he eats around the little brown thing he's in the middle.
Make it work. This ginger snap cookie is great.
But I already had one of their breakers.
As we're listening to Nate's like sugar problems, I realized he would be the worst diabetic ever.
Yeah, I probably am pre diabetic at this Well.
Does it take something as dramatic as being a diabetic? Oh yeah, I make you stop eating sugar pretty much.
I mean to say that I don't eat any sugar. No, I mean that that's why I wear an insulin pump and take insulin every day. But overall, like I could only imagine what your blood glucas looks like.
It's like my uncle has diabetes and he will eat a thirty two ounce can of hot fudge over the course of three days.
How can you held?
Is he type water? Type two?
I think, what's the one that you get as you get older.
He's got type two, can have a new type, your type tight type.
And there's type three dementia.
Basically, oh my god. Yeah, Well it is a.
Huge they're saying, it's a huge contributor. Sugar is a huge contributor to every single thing that goes wrong with.
Your Is it permanent damage?
No, I think you can reverse. I think once you've got the start of the dementia. I'm not sure how reversible that would be.
But diabetes it's reversible.
Yeah.
Yeah, and that by going doing away with children, so never gonna so nate before you give it up.
I mean, would now be a good time to hit you up for girlf skull cookies because my daughter is selling them?
Right, damn it?
All right, Nate's a monster. By the way, I'm just saying.
Who's a monster. I'm the one that brought the cookie.
But you are?
You are, and he's a monster.
You're eating them?
Okay? If I was addicted eating he had three already.
No, he has had them since I.
Was addicted to heroin.
You'd be like, okay, let me just roll.
How difficult were you being before we gave it?
Let me rig you up.
Yeah, if it betters it's a betterment of the bit of the building in the room, I'll happily give you some rules.
If you like, you have a friend that's, you know, an alcoholic and they're giving up alcohol, do you drink in front of them? I mean, here's like, yes, sugar, if they.
Say it's okay.
I gave it as a gift once to somebody who's an alcoholic and I had no idea.
That's what I'm a bottle of whiskey. And if you're doing it's not your fault. It's not if you did nothing wrong.
And I.
Have friends who don't drink, and they get uncomfortable if you don't drink her Because I know you typically.
I do have a question. Did you know he was an alcoholic? Of course not well, because.
You know.
This is why sugar is different, because sugar is totally legal and something we've been eaten and we continue to defeed it to our kids every morning. It's not like alcohol, it's not like heroin.
Well think about this though, like Elvis when you were a kid, like the when you were born, the doctor that delivered you was probably smoking a cigarette as he was doing it.
I doubt it, but maybe.
Creaking a whiskeys.
Back then, they smoke cigarettes in hospitals.
In sixty years, that is totally forbot like people don't do that. So what do you think it sixty years? People like you can't touch that cookie?
Could.
We're not gonna be around in sixty years.
I know that's it's going to be on fire before then.
I know we've talked about this before. But when they look at the skulls of ancient people like some of the Aztecs and the Wines, their teeth are all intact. We have terrible teeth now because sugar has brought it out, but they all had all their teeth.
They didn't have fruity pebbles back then, even though the mascots for fruity pebbles are from the Stone Age. Not good. It's just saying observation.
So how can we help you?
I can't, you can't.
It's really kind of on me. It's just it's all on you.
But do you really want to physically slap a cookie out of I think that.
Just stopped this.
I will say that because they do that just because they love slapping people. It's kind of fun.
We've had this conversation. It's impossible here because literally cookies. Hey, everybody, check out these bagels and the Oreo cookie cream cheese.
Oh my gosh, the Oreo cream cheese. I could eat the whole palette of cream cheese. That's how good it is.
And there's always one person's like, just try it.
Try, just take a but try.
I did that today the Helvis, I go, you really got to try the Oreos?
Like fine, Well, you know, on the other end, if you are the one who wants to cut back, for instance, I know there was a time when I was I wait a lot more and I go to eat breakfast, and Danielle would say out loud, do you really want to eat that?
Because you told us you want to do It's the same thing with me.
But I was trying to help.
You because you gives me away from stuff.
I got that, bitch.
Yeah, don't ask us to do.
It year yesterday.
Wait, when you were eating the icing, were you in your underwear and like socks and I was in my sleep shirts?
Did you hit rock bottom?
I did know. I was literally I.
Think if Ebony's.
Hear the candle?
Yeah, where's where's my Betty crocodd? First?
Wait? Did you see how he was eating it?
You said the long how are you eating?
I was sucking it out? Yeah? No, I was in my sleep shirt. It was ten thirty at night. I kind of was just laying in bed. I'm like, I really kind of need something. That's how you know? You know what?
The cream cheese frosting in the can is so good. It's so good.
Okay, Okay, Danielle, he's gonna start. If you're gonna fuck up, do it with the cream cheese frosting. All right, Well, look, you know we love you, and maybe I'm gonna throw all these cookies out or something.
Someone will go through the matter.
Because you know, there's always with an arm's length, there's something with sugar in it.
Yeah, something else somewhere.
This place is magical.
Oh my god.
So I was on that note.
Danielle was a witness to this. Yesterday, there's been a massive box of Star Wars sitting on my desk forever. I don't even eat them. I was cleaning off my desk yesterday. The entire box is empty, and I was told it was Nate.
That wasn't all me. I would take one every other day or so, and I was the only one.
Just wait, you're also the one that stole the cookies off my deck.
That wasn't me. I ate the cookies off. It probably was, but I did ask you several months ago. I said, Hey, you're in these Starbucks. You're like, I'm not. I'm not eating them all. So then I felt them all.
You love the one.
You know how we know that you are frazzled. Look at his hair. Nate has great hair, by the way, but yeah, the hair, his hair will take the shape of wherever he puts it with his hand. He runs his hand up through his hair out of frustration.
When you had the long hair after pandemic the poor.
You know, a cookie would calm you down, Cookie will come you would.
Make you feel good for me.
We request that you put your beard back.
Beard and ponytails first.
Okay, Scotty's being very quiet today.
Well, I mean kind of on the flip side in this place. When I don't eat stuff, you guys.
Make fun of me.
So I can't win here no matter what I don't.
You're inconsistent, like I can't eat that crap, and then you'll just come scoop the icing only.
Off of something I've decided that I just I don't want to eat like pastries and stuff like that anymore.
Nothing wrong with that, But anytime I don't, everyone's like, I'm just.
Eating finger banging. Who gives you hell?
To anybody here?
I don't. I would never would have done.
It, Scott. He shows you why, and he picks his shirt up and he sticks.
Out of his Sure, everybody's gotty.
No, I'm trying to get rid of that.
But I'm assuming Gandhi is the leader of the definitely people giving you crap.
Because he sits there and he's like, oh God, get away from me. I can't eat that ship. And then he is literally finger banging a pastry to take all the frosting off the top and from the inside, and then leaves the carcass there.
I mean, the jelly is delicious. Yeah, you suck the jelly out of the side of the donut.
See you and I should be lovers because I I don't like to jell your stuff. I like I like to below.
Yeah.
All right, we've done enough.
I think we have.
Well, thank you for listening to the Elvis Duran After Party podcast. It's right there in Neon ask for it by name. Please do the Elvis Duran After Party