Barbara faces the Drama Queen’s 23 (and then some) intimate questions. She reveals her perfect happiness, greatest fear, the weirdest thing she keeps by her bed and what she has hidden on her body 24/7!
Plus, having just returned from a month long road trip with her girls, Barbara has plenty she needs to get off her chest!
First of all, you don't know me.
We all about that high school drama. Girl drama girl, all about them high school queens.
We'll take you for a ride, and our comic girl shared for the right teams.
Drama, queens, up girl fashion, but your tough girl, you could sit with us.
Girl Drama, Queens, Drama, Quise Drama, Queens Drama, Drama, Queens Drama Queens.
Okay, so we're gonna have kind of a chaotic show for you because I'm getting furniture delivered right well of this episode. I tried so hard to make sure that this furniture delivery didn't happen while we were recording, but sometimes the universe just wants to add a little spice to.
Which your things never quite work out. Plus, you've got people yelling outside your window. The tree drummers are mad at each other. You guys.
We I just got an office for the first time since I worked at MTV, like an adult office, and it has been nothing but chaos. So bear with us as I put this place together. Meanwhile, we also have a wild card with us today for twenty three questions.
I'm very excited, aren't you.
I'm so stoked. I always love when we get to talk to Barbara, Barbara Allan Woods ladies and gentlemen.
She's so good looking, Barbara with the good light, yes, and the green kitchen else.
The load is joy.
Love it your home. You never are home. You're always on vacation.
I just got here.
You are You're always off with your girls somewhere fabulous.
We just drove seventy two hundred miles.
What you're such a fun mom.
Well I did it for me too, Like you don't get a chance to do that. And so with as soon as we heard about the strike, we hit the road.
Was it all the girls in you? So?
So Emily would meet up with us from time to time, because that's what does she could fly there. Yes, and then Natalie and or her boyfriend did the same thing. But then we kind of like we would merge and then separate and then get back together. And Ali was with me the whole time.
Oh that's so fun.
He dro We saw everybody. It was a month and it was amazing.
What a great idea. What was your route? Where did you guys go?
And we didn't have a schedule, We just decided where we wanted to go. We would go and he ended up We were in Wilmington for a while and it was the first time I had been in Wilmington where I didn't have to be there, you know, mentioned there was you know, I was able to hang out with my friends. I wasn't busy, I didn't have a schedule and it was amazing.
Well, you stayed somewhere cool. You sent us the link for this awesome new place, right fuys have.
To know about this because she wants to put up all of us. I mean, if she could help the One Tree Hill connection. It was so great because it's right on the river and there are these like condos, these two bedroom condos that overlook the river and they're brand new.
This is their house boats, Babe, their house boats. Oh wait, you're thinking there's condos like on the downtown.
Because I mean, you don't. They don't move, but they rock a little bit.
Oh my gosh.
It's like Vancouver.
Yeah. I love to do that. That's so fun.
Please, if you're heading that way, let me know and I'll hook you up.
Oh my god, Listen for anybody that loves the River Court and just really wants to spend some time on the Cape Fear River that's the perfect place to hang out.
Yeah, it's amazing, and the views and their little patios and you can see fish flo it's just like unbelievable. I loved it. I love it.
So we've got twenty three questions that we've been asking everyone since we're all on strike and we standing in solidarity, and we don't want to talk about the job we necessarily did together, but we want to know everything about you. So I hope you're prepared to tell us all your secrets today.
Joy kick it off, okay, Barbara, what is your idea of perfect happiness?
Oh? Being perfect happiness for me is being in the same country, same state, same room, doing the same thing with all three of my girls at the same time. And that rarely happens, and right now my life, that's happening. So I am very very content.
I love that they want to hang out with you, Barbara, Like, that is such a goal to have your adult children.
Want to hang out with you if they just feel guilty and I guilty, feel guilty. No, no, but that's the big thing about kids getting older. And I was so afraid of that because I I had such a box with my kids when they were younger, but as they get older, it's just a whole different thing. They become your friend. And that sounds so cliche, but they really do, you know.
It's yeah, I don't know if it is cliche, Barbara, because I have so many people in my life who and I'm sure you encountered this too when the girls were young, or like, oh just wait until she's a teenager. It's all going to go in the pooper, And I got to say, it's not the truth. It's not always the case. And actually, watching you raise your daughters so far ahead of me raising Maria really gave me a lot of hope and inspiration that like, it's gonna be okay, Like I actually can still be friends with her. We're not destined to hate each other for the next ten years.
No, And not to say I didn't have a We did have a few teenage moments, of course, a few, but in general, and then it all just comes round. And seriously, when they get into their twenties, they become your best friend. And Ali has never gone through any teenage.
Moments, like way ally.
The most solid kid, like it's just yeah, it's okay, you can do some things. Once she doesn't. She's just a really good kid.
Are you trying to get her to rebel? At this point you're like, hey, I'm not paying attention right now. You could sneak out of the house.
I never rebelled, and she's a little bit of a mini me, so maybe that's why. So I don't know, but I'm a little it.
Later she'll get into like some weird stuff in her thirties and you'll be like, what is this about.
I'm so old by then I won't care. Yeah, she has entertainment.
Okay. So then that leads us to our second question, which is a total one eighty Uh what is your greatest fear?
Don't don't, dun't.
Okay, I want to say, you know, sharks, that's boring. My fear is to be isolated in a place where I know I can't get out without my chapstick.
What you do have sumptuously, I mean, I completely like.
And if I can't get my coffee in the morning, I know that, Like you know, we'll go camping Vulham. Am I gonna have my coffee?
Mar Wait, Barbara, You're like, you've done so many amazing projects. The last one one of the ones that you did was with like was a horror movie with like a doll, Like, what are you talking about? Chapstick?
No situational life moments like oh here, oh my god, she just pulled chapstick out of her boobs. I'm like, you just know that if they need chapstick and we're out in public somewhere, they'll just reach in my cleavage and get it, because they don't always there.
Barbara, I could not have scripted that better. That was a magical revelution right there.
That was my favorite barbera secret.
Ever, how long have you been doing that? How long has that been your little.
Chapstick pocket.
For a very long time?
And it's always kind of warm now it is.
It kind of like gets it kind of soft. It's perfect. Oh my god, listen, I'm doing it. You know how they say, you know, but don't start chapstick because you'll get addicted. Well, I'm there.
Do you have a brand? What's your brand?
Well, because I was using chapstick and my girl said, oh, don't use chapstick because that's really addicting. So I'm trying this little chapstick thing called love Okay, and it has an it's.
Most of all the vices in the world that one seems manageable.
Okay, that's good for you. That's my biggest fear.
All right, what about this? If you could be the best in the world that's something, anything, anything at all, what would it be.
Oh, I would love to be the best dancer in the world. And let me tell you, I am a little bit self conscious about suburban housewife dancing. And you know, I'm from Chicago, where actors are triple threats, and if you want an actor, you take voice and you take dance, and if you're not a triple threat, like, good luck. And I kept up with the voice, and I'm okay. But I always knew that I wasn't going to be the best at dancing, and so it was a little discouraging and I didn't keep up with it the way I should have. And I've always been a little self conscious, like I have little.
Stripper moves that I can do. But weren't you in the de me Moar movie? Were you movie?
I did? I can do my stripper moves. I mean, I was a cheerleader. I can do foreographed moves. But when it comes you're like, let's get on the dance floor and dance like, oh god, really, And so if I could be the best dancer in the world or not even have to worry about it, that would be amazing.
I feel like we've seen you dance, and I think it's great. You got our vote.
I concur thank you. I love it. Okay, hold on, what's our next question? It is?
Oh god, Barbara, come on. What is the weirdest item that you keep by your bed? I'm sorry I have I'm a very high maintenance sleeper.
Oh.
I have a lot of things by my bed. But probably the weirdest is most people have white noise machines. I have a brown noise machine.
What is that? Yeah, I've heard of this.
Ever heard of brown noise? Oh it's deeper, it's more base, and it feels like you're in the womb.
Yeah. What it's like a lulling, like to the mo Yeah.
And it's constant. It has to be constant, because some noise machines have a break and so like every so often you'll hear like a click. It has to be constant. And so I have a brown noise machine and it travels with me everywhere I go and and I have not found an app on my phone that is the same as this one machine that I have. How did you even learn about brown noise? I mean I was always into white noise. I like something about so I'm not distracted. I always like a white noise.
Okay.
I always wished it was lower in my head. I was like, oh, I just wish the tone was lower. I'm looking into it, and sure enough, there's pink noise and brown. What else? I don't know. I know pink and brown, but brown's the best. Check it out. Okay, I'm sold. I love this well, learning so much.
Totally, Like I'm going to be on Amazon all night and I'm just like, well, I guess I need the ten foot skeleton and I need the brown noise.
I'll tell you. I'll let you know which one you can get on Amazon for sure.
I don't know you were high made in sleeper. I am too. There's a lot of things I'm very particular about. It's yeah, when I sleep.
Like, what give me one?
Well, it has to be absolutely dark. I can't deal with things that are glowing, like a room with the blue you know, the plugs that glow blue, or you know, and the television can't have a little light up like nothing, it'll keep me awake. The temperature is a big deal. I really can't sleep if it's any warmer than sixty nine sixty eight sixty nine mine is me? Yeah, yeap, And and I mean you could go much colder. Let's do it. It'd be great. And also like people who want to sleep too close, I cannot get away from me and I need a pillow between my knees.
You do do interesting. This is also interesting to me because there's like a whole subculture I'm learning sleep culture.
Yeah, of like I don't want.
To say particular sleepers, but like sensitive sleepers. You could open up a whole hotel that caters just a sensitive sleepers.
Do it?
You know?
You know when people you know just are at a party and they say, well just stay over, you know, just say I can't do it because I have my stuff with me. Yeah, you need to think I'm it's really tough. And when we were on the road for those seventy two hundred miles, I had all of my stuff.
You brought in a bag with your brown noise and your knee pillow every night in potentials. Yes, I like that.
Well, we'll talk shop some more later. Right now, I want to know, Okay, what is what living person do you most admire?
My mom? That's awesome and once again a little cliche, but it's true. I mean she gave up her a whole life for her kids, and that's how I learned to be a mom, and that's how I learned about holidays and how to stay young. And I mean I owe my whole life to her. So I'm for sure.
Well that's it that you said she stayed young.
She taught you how to stay young as.
We grow up. Man, that is a whole skill that no one talks you about, just like staying young. And you've always stayed like very young, Barbara.
You're playful. I mean, it's up here for sure, and so is my mom.
All right, Next question, what is your current state of mind? Where's your head at right now?
Complete utter contentment talking to you guys.
Ah.
I always feels so happy and safe talking to you guys, and miss you so much, and I'm just really really always happy to be doing this with you.
You're so consistent, too, Barbara. I feel like every time I see you, you're just a steady, steady person.
Oh, on the on, side.
But what is so rare?
That's true. So then what in that case is your greatest extravagance?
Start, Oh, talk about high maintenance. My blonde ice vanilla latte every single morning, and if I don't have it, I know, if I know I can't get it in the morning, I will get it the night before and put it in the fridge and you just get it with no ice because then you can just add the ice in the morning. But seriously, when I'm looking for a hotel or an apartment when we're on location, I make sure that it's near a coffee shop. And it can't be the coffee that I make myself. It has to be, you know, going out and getting it. There's something about this that I need. It's so stupid because coffee is just cand of keep getting more expensive. Yes, it's I consider this an extravagance. I've been doing it a long time.
That's good. So chapstick noise and you're fancy Starbucks coffees.
I mean yeah, I mean three hundred and sixty five days a year. Times, that's extravagant.
That's pretty low maintenance. Hime maintenance, Barbra, Okay, good.
Well, okay, what do you most value in your friends.
What qualities I think the common denominator with all of my best friends are that they're very non judgmental people, accepting of everybody and especially accepting of me. Unconditional love and oh tear Duck's open to me and they just accept me for who I am, and that allows me to be who I am around them. And as I get older, I think easy goes a long way, and I don't want to have to work when I'm with people, and yeah, they're just I feel the uncondition and a love And I have a lot of friends. I have a few really good friends, and I would say that that's that's kind of like, yeah, the common denominator, they're just accepting human beings.
It's so nice, especially because, like I don't know, I was explained to somebody the other day that there's a difference between like Hillary Burton the person and Hillary Burton the product because there's very much like a thing that has been bought and sold since I was eighteen years old, since you guys started working.
And so when you have people that know the thing behind the.
Product and they're really kind of like sensitive to it, they're like, yeah, I get messy. You can go dark here.
You know, the people who can cut you don't care. If your house is a mess, you don't care. I've been taking hours three days like those people. You know, you know, if I've done something wrong, I want those people. I can come like, hey, I've done this terrible thing. Oh we love you anyway, you know.
Just they're going to grab a shovel. Where did we bury it?
Exactly? Yeah, exactly.
We're just gonna bury all the bodies together.
We need that. So all right, here we go. Well, then, on what occasion do you if you lie?
She does?
She lies? On what occasion do you lie?
Well, I'm so afraid to say this, like whisper. Every kid's growing up, every Christmas, every Easter, every time they lost a tooth, I lied, I see. Just in case anyone's watching.
This, yeah, yeah.
I hear about it. To this day.
They're mad about it.
Emily is traumatized by the fact lied to her. No, you could have just told me the truth. We tell, you know, we tell the truth about these things. And wow, yeah.
I see what you're saying. I am in that boat right now, Barbara.
Okay, then let's not talk about it.
And it's it's uh, you don't know whether you're being duped. I know, like I know if I'm being during by my thirteen year old.
Oh you do, because when it's gone, it's so sad. I know.
I listen, I'll hold on till they're forty and I don't care.
Yes, it's so much fun. And even to this day, Emily, especially for some reason, won't let me talk about it. Yeah, don't no, even now. Oh wow, I love that kid.
I love that she's holding your feet to the fire.
That's yeah, I'm calling for well when he hears this segment, Hillary, no one hears this part of.
The I'm not going to tell them, Okay, listen, I'm not telling them. This is between us and like a couple one hundred thousand people. But they are not going to tell the girls either. Okay, So we know you're going to continue doing that forever. But what is one thing you will never do again.
I will never sell my house your dishonest lawyer ever again. And if you ever have to sell a house, make sure you know this person's background before you do. Jeez, And I will fill you guys in. Yeah, but that's the best advice I could ever give you.
It's already such an emotional time when you sell a house, but it's just it's trauma no matter what you do, because moving is hard and the financial risks are scary. And so when you have someone that's been predatory in that situation, awful.
After the fact, after she bought the house, what yeah, wow.
Yeah, wait, this is the lawyer that you used to sell a house or the person that.
Bought happens to be a lawyer.
Oh oh my.
Gosh, boo has ooh bad karma her way scent, don't I'm uh yeah, I'll feel you.
It's a big deal, though it's hard to know. It's you go into business with people in various ways, and it's hard to know. It's just hard to know. I've had I've definitely run into situations where people just rip you off and they you think they're one thing and they turn to be something else. It's awful.
Never occurred to me, but it's a lesson learned, and I will teach that to everybody. Just you know, look into somebody's background before you, like you said, yeah.
I mean, if you want to know some like sneaky things you can do, like poor Salt in their front yard and grass won't grow. I will.
I'm looking for all of those ideas very much.
Find barbering a cat suit in the middle of the night in their yard, just like dumping a huge bag of rock salt.
Yeah, yeah, I like this plan.
Okay, it's so good. All right. What's the strangest purchase you've ever made or almost made?
Oh? Yeah, there we go, there we go.
You have to describe it for our listeners.
Can you see him?
And yes?
And I did not name him, my kids did. His name is Antoine.
She's got a big, old, big, old huge skeleton in the house.
His name is Antoine. And we tried to get him three years in a row. He's from Home Depot. But Natalie, who's my big Halloween fan, well we all are, but hers, especially three years ago he came out and we couldn't get him because he sold out immediately. I had to get him. The next year sold out, like I don't know, like Easter time was sold out. And then this year she said, and I'm getting him this year, and it was a big night. We drove her a little Toyota to see if we could get him, and then we couldn't fit him in the car, and we had to take body parts his body by piece, like the little trips home, piece by piece because we couldn't fit him in the car. He's big, twelve feet high.
Yeah, it's like Gulliver's travels, like you guys with a little what are they called the little Putians carrying this big, huge, giant body.
Hilarious.
I like that.
You might leave him there year round. I'm not sure, but where.
Are you going to put him the whole resident. You're gonna have to put Christmas decorations on him at some point to replace him.
But he comes apart, so we'll.
Everybody will just live with some bones.
Yeah, it's you and all the goth girls from my high school that have the twelve foot skeleton from home Stories. I'm so proud of you. You're part of a very elite squad of goth girls. Oh, I'm proud of you. You meet your goth girlfriends, not even a little bit surprised though. You always had the best costumes at our Halloween party like you would show.
Uh, yeah, we have so many. If you guys ever need to borrow costumes, please because.
I'm good to know.
Yes, Okay, Well, this question now we're gonna get fancy. Let's get serious, ladies. Who are your favorite writers?
Kay? So, I was a theater major and I was a bit of a theater snob in college. So when you say writers, I mean I think immediately I think authors, But I was I was a theater snob, So I was always into play rights, you know. I was really into Pinter Tennessee Williams, all the classical play rights. But I kind of feel like when you say writers, I want to shout out the amazing WGA writers who don't get enough recognition, yeah, and support and attention. And I know you guys, through this little project that we did together for nine years, some of these amazing writers, I feel like they didn't get enough attention. And I am binging this little project that we did right now with my sixteen year old daughter, and I am constantly crying and so amazed by one of my favorite episodes, Jennifer Cecil wrote, Yeah, super talented and also one of my favorite writers, Stacy Rukeiser Yeah, and Michelle Ferty Goodman. And I have to say this was not a project we did together, but David E. Kelly is one of my favorite writers. Oh my gosh, yeah, that worked years and years and years ago, and he's so loyal to his actors, and then Natalie ended up working with him. And he's so brilliant and he infuses humor into everything he writes, and he's a little bit off and I've always been a fan of his and I hope I get to work with him again. But he's amazing. So let's shout out these WGA amazing talented writers.
That's such a good answer. They literally are therapists for the entire country. Like they're the people who set our collective tone about, like, hey, what are we going to discuss in our national discourse?
What feels good? What feels bad? You know, they're important ends of course, and it begins up there with them, And so yes, one of them.
What's your greatest regret? You don't seem like someone who has regrets, but maybe you do.
I regret getting addicted to chapstick. Yeah, very slow to have listened to my mother. Speaking of my mother, I wish, Oh we're getting so deep, but I regret. I had a great grandmother who lived to be almost one hundred. She just missed one hundred. She was ninety nine, and I wish And I know I was really young, but I wish that I had spent more time just talking, having deep conversations with her and my grandmother, who I loved and saw all the time, and you know, she would give me money and I would hug her and we would spend time together. But I'm talking about deep, deep conversations the older generation, how much you can learn and trust from the older generation. I just wish I had spent more time with my relatives who could have taught me so much. Yeah, I am teaching that to my girls. Call grandma, talk to her. Don't just say hi, don't you know, don't have small talk. Ask her about Oh can I tell you what I just did? Yes, this is so exciting. So my dad is not arounding more. My mother is. But they spent their honeymoon in a hotel in Chicago twenty years ago. So it was nineteen thirty. I don't know. I think it would have been there like their sixty fifth anniversary or something. They just had their anniversary and we were going through Chicago, and so my girls and I spent the night at the Drake Hotel in Chicago, and I told the owners of the Drake that we were going to be doing this, and they were thrilled. So I asked my mom about it, and she took out her scrap books and in her scrap book she had her stay at the Drake Hotel, which included match books, a little bits you're like a shoe cleaner, and the receipt for the hotel fourteen dollars and forty cents high. Roland says their honeymoon. This is where they spent their honeymoon. And we went around and took pictures and it was just it was amazing.
That's cool.
It was amazing.
I saw one of your girls post all these like beautiful hotel pictures. It's like a beautiful classic hotel, right, yes.
And when I when I posted as well, and then I started getting you know a lot of people chiming in, like that's where my parents been their a honeymoon and I had my wedding there and it was so great. So that's what I'm talking about, knowing your parents, knowing your grandparents, knowing like really nothing to the past.
Yeah, it makes a difference.
Barbara, that is such a good answer. Okay, talk to me about something that you really dislike.
Okay, I have something called misophonia. Yes, so you don't have this joy.
I think Paul has it for sure. But I have a very I think I have a very small because there are moments that I'm like, I can't function.
But it starts small and it gets to be worse as you live life. But there are certain sounds. And I'm not talking about nails on a chalkboard whatever I can take that. I'm not talking about gum chewing. I can handle that. I'm talking about suits, little specific things that maybe nobody else would notice. And my kids know the look.
When, yeah, you're trapped in your body.
Anything plastic, like a plastic water bottle crunching. It's a neurological reaction that I have that I seriously could kill something. It's just so bad danger and self diagnosed. No one's ever told me I have this, but I looked it up and I definitely have this.
What did we do before the internet? This is why so many women thought they were crazy before the internet, because they felt like they were alone in these situations.
And now that we can connect, God blast, I love. What do you have? One trigger noise?
Joy, It's more in its repetitive sounds, so it's a major Like I could listen to a water bottle get crinkled. But if there's some small, repetitive whether it's a beep, I cannot have ticking clocks anywhere in the home.
Can you hear this?
Yes? Like I could manage that for about twenty seconds, and then it would start to irritate me. But then if it was continual and random, like if it's on a if it's on a meter, I can last longer. But random clicks. And the funny thing is I usually don't notice it until my body is reacting and I'm like, what is happening to me? And then all of a sudden, I can It's like a like a bat signal, and I just zero in on the sound and I'm like.
Get it. You have it? Oh?
I like, is it just your body producing ortisol or like adrenaline.
I don't know. I think it's therapy. I think you would have to, you know, I think they would probably immerse you in this sound until you got over it.
Oh no, that's a war crime, Barbara. You will maybe you guys are like deficient in your magnesium magnesium.
I went to a movie with Paul once and he was the person behind me was crinkling a candy wrapper and it took me a second. He was on it right away. He just kept looking over his shoulder and shuffling in his seat because I was like, well, it's your deal. He was like the candy wrapper. And as soon as he said it that, I was like, oh no.
I have the look down to like on an airplane. I have the look. I'll do that. Well, they get it, I'll get it. Yeah.
The pretty ladies getting agitated over there, settled down, folks.
Well, okay, So with Sophomia notwithstanding poor What is the greatest love of your life? Who accepts this? Avoue?
Natalie, Emily, Olivia, They're the love. But I do need to do a little shout out to the first love of my life, who was Paul Weeks my high school boyfriend. By Paul, he went away to college. He was two years older than me, which was, you know, pretty extreme back in the day. But we would write each other letters twice a day. Who and if we didn't receive two letters in the mail, and so like maybe on Tuesday we might not because there was no mail on Sunday, so you know you anyway, we had it figured out, but we would get two letters a day and I still have all of these letters in bags. Saved ours and he taught me about love and romance and respect and we're still good friends. Everything after that. I mean, he set the standard, and I think it's so important, especially as my daughters are dating, Like the first one is so important, and I find myself comparing with and I told him that, like this is take it as a compliment, like everyone was compared to you because it was really perfect in high school. It was perfect.
That does sound dreamy. I don't know if I ever liked anyone enough to write two letters a day, though, Barbara, Like, that's a big deal.
I was in love, man, And that's why I also take their relationships very seriously. When some people say, oh, they'll get it. You know, she's sixteen. No, it's real. It's so real. Real, Yeah, so real, because I know mine were, because at my age I can still look back and say, no, it was real.
Oh for sure. For sure, it's embar seen sometimes but very real. Oh all right, So then when and where were you happiest?
I think I might have been the happiest I ever was, And hopefully there will be more happiness in the future. I'm not saying I will never be this happy again. But when I was living in Wilmington, I had three little girls, two and then three, I had the best friends. I was working on a project that I loved so much, and I think it was the perfect yin and yang where I could be a mom, I could work, I could go back to being a mom, I could go back to work, I could bring my kids to my work, and it was just the perfect balance. And on top of that, I wasn't working five days a week. I was working maybe three days a week. And I love, you know, being a mom to little kids and living on the beach, and it was just it was perfect.
It's nice when you can know in the moment, like I always felt like you. You exuded that happiness in the moment, right, and you made parenting seem like a blast. Yeah, it was never like truly, Oh, I don't know my lines because I was off all night with the kids. You know, like you never ever played that card. You were just like everything is fun. But you, you guys are exactly like that girl.
Thanks. We learned from the best.
Oh well you trained us.
It was it was already in your blood.
So okay, here's the next question, which it's sort of like the earlier one, but it's slightly different. This one is which talent would you most like to have? So you might not be the best in the world at it, but it's just something that you really Yes, go.
I wish that I would have the nerve and be good at being a stand up comic.
Yes, Barbara, you could though. Oh, I.
Could totally see that.
I respect comedians so much. I respect improv actors. I could never. I would never. I couldn't be myself and be funny. I could be a character and be funny, but I couldn't be myself.
Maybe I could be in characters too, Like everyone when they're doing stand up is like playing a version of doing stand up.
You know. It's still like I would have to create a persona and go on the road as somebody else. I could never do it as myself.
I mean, that's also a sexy idea. It's a great person Oh.
My god, I love that. Yeah. You know, before I was married, before I had kids, I used to go to the Laugh Factory in the improv on Sensible by myself and just watch stand up I really respect it. And you know, some of those stand ups are not really happy people. It's kind of like when you actually meet them, they're very serious about their comedy. But I think if I could be really good at something and I could just like get the gene immediately, I wish I could be good at stand up.
I think that this is a feasible future for sure. I think if you start just keeping a notebook of the shit that you think is funny, having a comedian that comes at it from a lighthearted approach, and just like everything is fun Like deb is so funny, not because the words on the paper were funny, but because you're funny.
Agreed.
Okay, Well, if I can have a writer, if I can have somebody write the comedy for me, then maybe I need some like giving me a baseline and then I can go from there. I can add funny to.
It in a writing partner. Yeah, that's possible.
We're gonna this is happening done to dreams are happening here on drama Queen's. Okay, if you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
Don't even have to think twice about this. I would stop worrying about everything. I worry. I worry, I worry, I worry. I do keep a pad and pen next to my bed. In the middle of the night, I wake up, I have a thought. I can't just I just can't drop it. I have to write it down, get it out of my brain, like my worry notes. And if I don't have anything to worry about, I will worry about your problems and your problems, my kid's problems, and my mom's problems. Like I cannot stop caring so much. And my daughter Natalie always says, just don't care so much. Yeah, not easy for you to say, just don't care, don't care. You just can't turn it off, easy, turn it off.
I worry about this also might be a magnesium deficiency symptom.
Oh can you imagine if solved all of my problems? No one min Yeah, no for wrying.
Yes, my best friend gave me a like mushroom tea instead of coffee because she was like, you're worked up, and you don't need caffeine. You need like these other things. And like, to be honest, I did feel calmer unless worked up. Could It's just brain chemistry, right, yeah, A.
Lot of it? Yeah, all right, we're shipping you some magnesium.
Gumbies magnesium and yeah, drugs, We've got this.
Yeah, Barbara, what do you consider to be your greatest achievement?
Oh, my kids? Yeah, blah blah blah, like obviously.
And blah blah blah. That's legitimate for.
The answer to all my questions. But without a doubt, you know, it would be on my tombstone. This is my the thing that I will leave to the world my children. Nothing else even comes close.
That's awesome.
I love that they feel the same way about you, because you know, like I'm friendly with your daughters. I talk to them behind your back, and I, as a parent know like there's going to come a time where it's going to be probably pretty one sided where my kid cares more about their friends than they do about their dorky ol mom. The idea that you have raised these three kids in a brutal industry and they are as solid as they are and as talented and like well respected and well behaved and like you know, they're just they're so good, Barbara, in an environment that can oftentimes foster bad behavior. Yeah, and that is you, babe, And that you weren't so scary doing it that they still think you're like one, that's crazy.
I had tunnel vision when it came you know, to raising them, which is why it was great to be working at the same time because it's sort of forced me not to have tunnel vision. Yeah, you know, after a project that we worked on together was over, I had more tunnel vision, which sort of, you know, I didn't see my friends as often as I would have liked. I didn't pursue my career as much as I maybe should have. And I'm not positive the tunnel vision was the right way to go, But when I look at the way they are now, it's sort of, you know, gives me some sort of verification that, yeah, it's good. It's good the way it worked out.
How is dealing with other stage moms, Like, as my kids express interest in working, I'm like, oh.
No, and I will kill anybody who ever calls me that because I want to be the opposite of that.
Yeah, you're not a stage mom at all.
At the local little performing arts center, I'm a stage I'm in there just like what is this costume? I'll do the hair and makeup.
It's one thing because you know, I mean, you know better than everyone else. I just yeah, no, I've had I've had some experience with them, and I just stay away. We stay away as much as we can.
You have a code word, safe word, Antelope, Antelope at three o'clock. All right, if you were to die and come back as a person or thing, what would you want that to be?
I would come back as one of my girls. Dogs. Dogs get treated like royalty around here. They have home cooked meals, They sit on the couch, watch movies. We have like yoga time for them, and they listen to la seeing music. They you know, it's three of them, so they're all good friends. They always have their friends, you know, they go on vacations, they travel the world, and I really do believe they get treated better than I do. Come back, blasphemy, one of their dogs. That would be so amazing to die and come back as a dog that they own, and I could just like keep track of.
Still still be on top of it.
All. Oh my god, there's a movie in this for sure, for sure.
Yes, right it. I love that, all right, Barbara, Do you have something in your life that's just so easy that you know this is where I think I know the answer to this too. But you just know this is where I belong. I'm so good at this or this particular field or space or what.
I mean this space. I my daughters and I put a lot into this house and it was a very symbolic thing for me because when I was very young, I thought, Okay, I want to be an actress, and if I can ever buy a house from being an actress, like you know, with no other income, this would mean I'm done. That's what I you know, I can die now. And I'm not saying I want to die now, but this house is sort of that simple for me. But the fact that we put a lot of our heart and time and energy into renovating it, and we actually knocked down walls and you know, not just painted, but we did floors and countertops, and now it's just has our signature on it, and it just has our you know, blood and sweat and tears in it, and it just means so much more. And I've never done that with a house before, and it just I highly recommend it. You know, you can YouTube it and you can really do anything. Everywhere I go, there's just like a little reminder of this thing that we created together, and this is my place now I never want to leave.
Oh well, Barbara. That leads us like right into the next question, which is where would you most like to live?
Oh? Here, But if not here, and I'm not one of those East Coast people who you like, I hate living in CALIVRAI I love living in Los Angeles. I love living It's beautiful. I'm looking at a view right now, it's beautiful. I'm from Chicago. I miss it a lot, and I've just spent time there and for the first time I realized I could live in Chicago again. And I actually do miss the winters a little bit. Yeah, age of seasons. And I still call Wilmington my home because for me it really felt like home raising my kids there. So I would choose here because of my house Chicago if my kids are there, or Wilmington if my kids are there.
I mean, yeah, best of both worlds. Just get a vacation house in Wilmington that you can rent out.
Yeah, get one of those boats a little get a.
Boat house boat. Yeah, I'm all for it.
You're b and B and rented out to people like during conventions and yeah.
So then the last question, which instantly I think we should move these around a little. I think we should end on a different question because it's a little bit of an it's a little anti climactic. But what is your most treasured possession?
Oh?
This could be very climactic.
I guess that's true.
What is your most valued possession? Is it this?
Okay? I will try to make this lot anti climactic. Like the thing that you would grab in a fire, Yeah, the first thing I would grab. I'm a photo fanatic, and even these days where everyone has all their photos on their phone, I still print them and frame that and put them up. And I have an attic full of boxes and boxes and boxes and boxes of pictures, and you guys are actually hanging up in my closet. I have my photo it of all of us, and I would grab my photo albums. They're my most treasure possessions because it's like from my birth all the way to now, and everything is just sort of, you know, accumulated in these little books. And you know, like on shows soap operas where somebody has a memory and they'll go to the picture and they'll trace it with their hands and they'll think back, and all of a sudden there's a flashback and then you come back and they're crying. Well I do that.
Yeah, I'm like, oh I remember.
This time and I and then I'll just like flip the pages and my finger will go to one point to it and that's like I do that. So my photo albums. I would grab my photo albums. They're my most treasured possessions. When I was moving from house, I made sure that those were put like in a separate storage so they were kept safe. Was that anti climactic?
I don't know even No, it's so true.
You know, you want to see a picture, go to your phone, like, it's not the same as having it there all the time.
Well, and also, even though you could reprint things, there are a lot of photos that were taken before we had phones and there I have lots of books and bins of those two and you do, yeah, I do, absolutely. I don't have them all in frames, but yeah, there are times when I just want to go back and look and remember.
Yeah.
Best is when you find like writing on the back, oh, oh yeah, I forgot, I forgot I wrote this, that's right.
And my parents with their photo album it was my dad's handwriting, and he's not around anymore. And I know his handwriting, and just to see his handwriting makes you feel like he's really there.
That connection to your family again.
Yeah, Barbara, we have so many good memories with and so I'm so happy that you came on today. And yeah, thing now everyone knows all of your deepest, darkest secrets, including the brown noise machine.
You know, check with me because I'm going to talk of the magnesium with mushrooms when I get off the path, and I'm gonna let you know how it goes. Enjoy you do the same, because you will.
It can't hurt.
And if you travel together, you know that we can room together because we secret wife.
Absolutely, I love it. It's so great to see you always.
I just love you. Okay, I will.
She's having some wild adventure with her parents in Europe right now, and so she's doing the exact thing you've talked about all this episode, like really connecting with family and we value that.
Yeah.
Yeah, all right, baby, kiss those girls for us.
We love you and them.
Okay, bye bye, Barbara. Hey friends, thank you for joining us. Sorry we didn't get to bring in Sofa on this one, but we'll be here soon. And I'm so glad that you joined us with Barbara. She's such a class act and such an interesting person.
Queen Man, you love Queen Barb.
So we'll see you next time. Hey, thanks for listening. Don't forget to leave us a review. You can also follow us on Instagram at Drama Queen's ot.
H or email us at Drama Queens at iHeartRadio dot com.
See you next time.
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