Round the F*ck Up (with Dan Savage)

In this episode of Music Is Therapy, DJ Hesta Prynn sits down with Dan Savage — sex and relationship advice columnist, creator of the Savage Lovecast, and one of the most honest voices in love and relationships alive today — to talk about why "the one" is a myth, and what to do instead.

Hesta opens with the story of losing her entire CD collection on a plane. Every album. Gone. And instead of trying to rebuild what she had, she bought discount CDs, explored genres she'd never considered, and accidentally became a DJ.

The lesson? You don't find your taste. You build it. And relationships work exactly the same way.

But first, love.

In this episode, we dive into:

There Is No "The One": Why the search for a perfect partner is the thing that's actually keeping you from a great relationship — and what Dan means by "rounding up" instead
How to Revise Your Relationship Story Without Blowing It Up: The difference between editing a narrative and burning the whole thing down
What Dan Got Wrong: About straight guys. About bisexuality. About asexuality. About the location of the clitoris. (He's honest. It's a lot.)
A Good Long-Term Relationship Is a Myth Two People Create Together: Not something you stumble into — something you write, revise, and recommit to, daily
Practical Advice for Online Dating: What actually works, what's a waste of time, and why most people are doing it wrong
From Monogamous to Open to Poly: Dan's own relationship evolution — and what it taught him about what people actually need versus what they think they want
How to Keep Monogamy Interesting: The honest conversation about long-term desire, and why "staying together" is not the same as thriving together
The It Gets Better Project: What it's like to be Dan Savage — the weight of it, the reach of it, and what he's learned from two decades of being a lifeline
His Love of Musicals: Yes, the man who hates the electric guitar is deeply, unironically obsessed with musical theater. Hesta has thoughts.
The Electric Guitar Controversy: Dan hates it. Hesta will never forgive him. This is not resolved by the end of the episode.