Swifties will do just about anything to see their girl Taylor, and Camilla is no different! She shares her not-so glam travel experience to The Eras Tour. Jess educates us all on “Cuffing Season” and also lends a hand to some Call It Crew members who are missing their single life and dealing with an awkward family breakup.
Call It What It Is with Jessica Capshaw and Camille Luddington, an iHeartRadio podcast.
Hello, Hello, Hello, Hello, Call.
It Crew, and welcome to another episode of Call It.
What It Is, What It Is? What it Is. Jessica Capshop. We're filming in the We're recording this at nighttime, and I think there's a vibe ooh yeah, just like a more chill like do I want a glass of wine? Maybe I do. I don't know, Like I'm just like, wow, welcome Call It Crew.
Yeah, they're just getting a little more, a little relaxed us a little yeah, a little more like a little more a softer voice.
Yeah, get a little your DJ voice, yeah, my intimate voice.
Oh oh you're intimate, Yeah, because you've got moves. Do see what sweater I'm wearing. I do need to talk about.
This, because yes, we need to talk about this. Where did you go last week? That was very exciting?
Okay, So by the time this comes out, I think she'll be in Canada and it's I think it's the last stop of the tour. But I my Gray's Anatomy schedule switched very last minute, super super super last minute.
And I got to take Hayden. I mean it was so last minute that there was literally no flights left.
Basically, wait, how did you find you you got the call? And then how did you feel inside?
Well? I knew that we could potentially go on this Friday, and I was geeking out because first off, it's Taylor. Of course I want to go again, like I'm so excited, But also my kid, it's her first concert ever, and I think she was a little bit too little last year and she didn't know as many songs. Now she knew more songs.
Oh, I saw the video footage. She knew all the words. You know, we always you always joke that my daughter Eve is really yours. Hayden might actually be Taylor's.
Well, I mean she might, yeah, yeah, she was. Honestly, she's She's just a capsuaws. She was a full leo. She's not a leo, but it was like a full lea. It was her concert.
Oh my gosh, she was owning it in a way that was Leonine for sure, because.
It was a world So of course I'm like, great, the schedule switched, we can go. We can make this. I get online. Every single flight is taken. We basically we flew cargo like we had Taylor toilet. Yeah, the Taylor fact.
We flew into New Orleans. It was incredible.
The crowd was so amazing, everybody that I met there, you know, because the crossover you know this, the crossover grades anatomy fans are is so amazing. And then the next day New Orleans was just full of the streets are just full of people singing, and it was just it was a whole it was a whole vibe.
Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah.
I also flew.
Because it was the only flight left. And this is gonna sound snoppy or not, because I think this is just like a this is just pop culture, right. I did fly for the first time Spirit Airlines home. Hmmm have you ever flown Spirit? Because their reputation, I'm gonna be honest, isn't isn't the best. I didn't know what to.
There are some keywords that come up that I think you wouldn't want to come up when you're talking about air travel, like safety.
I did wonder listen if you were gonna live well, I mean I did.
I did google the safety record of Spirit.
And this is not is not I'm not being a paid I'm not paid.
Huh, just say this. We're gonna get you a Spirit deal after this.
It has a good Yeah. Seriously, I hope my face is on the side of those planes. My first huge endorsement mean Spirit. I can see it. The plane was it's great. I heard that they I heard that the problem comes that they cancel flights all the time. But when I got on the plane, I did examine it. It had windows, had wheels and wings. So I was like, check, check check, there's a pilot check the only thing. And I was warned by so many people because I asked, like the crew on a graze not I even like, who's flown Spirit? And they were like godspeed. They're like, if you make it home, that's good.
Do they have enough insurance on you?
They do?
The seats listen anything for Taylor? The seats are starlephione It. Well, no, they're kind of like that metal And I don't think they've invested in like a cozy, like a cozy, comfortable like cushion situation. It feels like they've just put like a pull over sweater over the metal.
That's like like a lawn chair, like a launcher, like you're sitting in a lawn chair for a while.
Listen, it got me homeside.
Relax and enjoy your lawnchair exactly.
And you know what, spirit, I don't know what all the hate is about.
Yeah, I got you there safe, all in one piece. You got to see Taylor and then you got to come home.
Listen anything for Taylor?
Oh yeah, yeah yeah. And did you see any interesting people there?
Was there?
Anyone that you knew there? I think it's always so weird when you see people you know but in a different place.
I don't like, I don't actually know them, but I there was Josh Hutchinson was there. Oh my gosh.
Poppy would have had you didn't tell me that.
Yes, Oh, Peter forever she would do.
Oh really, Oh my gosh, when you see her next week, if you tell her what, you tell her that in person. Peter was there, She's gonna die.
And he was there with his mom.
And they need Jake BURRELLI who plays you know, Lee By Schmidt on Green's Not and so they were instantly like so cute, so friendly. Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds were there. I've never met them, you know, Blake, we know both of them, yep, and very sweet, so funny, and their daughter adorable. They were exchanging friendship bracelets and then so much.
Love in the audiences. It's like, it's just insane.
You know what. It was a good vibe everyone there. It's just you can't go wrong until I just lie. And then I expected and then it ended, and I was like, oh, this is the moment where someone's gonna grab me and be like it's time for you to meet Taylor's a capsule.
And instead, do you know what actually happened? Like twenty minutes before the show we've been ended. They're like, some people are leaving now if you.
Want to leave.
I was like, the secret room is literally not happening, and in fact, and in fact, as I was leaving, right they take you through the back way and at one point the security guard turns to us like we're in like a war movie, right, like we're in saving Private Ryne. He goes stop, everyone pause, and I was like, oh my god, what's happening And he was like, we need to leave.
Let Taylor leave.
First she leaves and then you guys leave. So it wasn't just that I didn't get to go to the secret room. Is that I couldn't even be within one hundred feet of her, leaving in case we caught eyes. I was like, damn, this is like it was like a military operation.
I couldn't even walk near her.
So they didn't happen for me, Jessica, it did not happen for me.
Oh there's always another time, is there. Yes, the world's full of possibilities. The world is full of possibilities. I deeply believe in hope. You know what, poppy delusion? You know what same thing I was. Poppy's been having a hard time falling asleep lately, And I actually, as soon as I fall asleep, actually before my head hits the pillow, I have no problems with that. And and she said so sweetly and so vulnerably, She was like, but Mom, what do you do if you can't fall asleep, to which I replied, doesn't happen. But I do remember a time when it didn't. And I said to her, when I used to not be able to fall asleep, I remember I would lay there with my eyes closed, and I would think about all the things that I wanted to happen, all the things that I was hopeful for, all the things that I was excited for and I would just and I would fall asleep while thinking about all the things that I wanted and all that stuff. And I actually I remember it so clearly, And she did it last night and she said it actually worked for her too.
That's cute.
That's a little manifestation. So I'm gonna lie there tonight and I'm gonna imagine that no one's like cool, you know, and just that I'm actually getting escorted into the room.
It was so jarring, it was so stressful.
Oh my gosh, can you by the way, can you imagine all the things that like that they don't talk about that they happened to her from.
Oh yeah, there are.
Some fucking crazy people out there.
No, it's true.
I mean they may be crazy with love, but it's still crazy.
Oh no, I can't. I can't imagine that kind of intensity.
Yeah, it's a lot. That's a lot of Oh. I love that you went. I'm so glad, I know. Yeah, what are we going to talk about today?
I'm really excited to talk about this because I feel like everybody's experience is really different and I actually don't know the story this this these stories that belong to you, and you don't know the ones that belonged to me. We're talking about moving in with a partner.
M yeah, I don't. We never talked about this. We have never. It's such a far distant path.
It's such a crawling back there, multiple multi dick what eight? Okay, So I need to know what age were you when you first moved in with a boyfriend, because I'm assuming Christopher was not the first person.
I thought about this a lot because obviously we're talking about this. You know, I had a lot of mini move ins.
What's a mini move in?
I feel like it's almost the thing you do when it was like it was the non committal move in.
Did you have your own place? The other person kept a place?
Oh no, that doesn't count, jesss but like a room, like they make a room and like they had a roommate and it was just like but none of their stuff was in it. No, that doesn't count.
I don't think that counts.
I think we've got a cat. I think I think the.
Movie Moving Day boxes.
Yes, there's no I mean the quote unquote is there's no escape plan, right right right right right with that, there's an escape plan.
M m m m hmm.
I really, I really only prefer escape plan in my youth.
I know, by the way, everyone in their twenties could do with an escape plan.
Where's the hatch? For real? I do anything, I need to know where the hatches for Yeah?
Sure, Unfortunately, what about you? Wait now I'm wondering, like, hang on, hang on? Is Christopher the first person then that I moved in with with no escape plan?
With no escape yeah?
Wow?
How old were you?
You were?
Howled to.
Six?
So not engaged though?
No?
And no, we were not engaged. And I remember having like a two second no. My friends would probably call me a liar back then. I'm sure I thought about it. I don't remember thinking about it a lot. I don't remember it being like, oh, I have to be engaged in order to move in. Yeah, but it felt very much like that's where it was going. Like it didn't feel like maybe it felt like, yeah, we're gonna get me.
Yeah.
I do have to have a lot of friends, or had a lot of friends in my twenties who kind of threw that around, like I have to be engaged to move in. Yeah, and those girls were in in a week, do you know what I mean? Like it's like they went from the bar in an uber to the in a U haul.
Yeah yeah, yeah, you.
Know, and that didn't follow through.
But I was. I think there's there's a very specific reason why christopher'sly person that I lived with because I was not. I mean, now that you're telling me my movements don't count, that was my move, the mini move in. So it's like I found I could definitely feel like I had lived with people, but I guess I wasn't really.
I think the problem in Los Angeles, and this is this is hard here is if you're not living together, but you're spending all the time together, you're spending so much time in your car, like you're you're lugging your shit back and forth. You got the you know, you got the Duffel bag, and it just becomes an inconvenience as opposed to, wow, this is this is it for me, you know, like this is.
It's more, well, at least for me.
I was like, I'm tired of like living out of a bag and like, oh crap, I forgot my toothbrush. Like I was just done.
M hmm. I moved.
The first boy I moved in with was my high school sweetheart, that was rough. Whoa, yes, wait, so how old were you a really young twenty one, twenty two?
Wow? And we would just we would just you know.
Did you do it because you really wanted to live together? Because it was more convenient, money, all of it.
I think we had been together for a while, but like when you were in high school and you've been with somebody, you're not like, you don't really know the deal, right, and then you jump into living with them and you're like, wow, that we are very different people, and so it didn't last very long.
Yeah, because people are in your stuff and sorry, when you're that age, like, I don't think now, I'm not I'm just not. I don't know. I just I'm like a like, I like the boundaries. I like to like keep some mystery. But I think then you would definitely be sneaky sneaking into their stuff and like what did they have here when they weren't there? No?
Oh yeah, oh yeah yeah yeah, yeah for sure.
And I remember having a boyfriend sneaky sneak into my stuff and like coming home and asking me about something that was clearly not out and being like.
Uh uh nope, yeah, you can't help yourself when you're twenty one. You can't help can't help yourself.
I can do it to you, you can't do it to me. No, for sure.
I did have girlfriends also that were like very horrified, and I hate this and I think it's so gross.
This drives me crazy.
Like the boys they move in with and they just don't care and they're like whooping with the bathroom door open and talk yes, like wait, who's doing part? Like the boyfriends, it is like yes, and it's like it just kills it kills the sex drive, yes, the whole thing, like you're doing that.
I'm done.
I couldn't.
But there are people that are that think that's fine, like bathroom door open.
Yeah, no, no, yes, no, yes, they exist out there, yes, these sick individuals.
I don't want that now, I mean I.
Know, no, you never want that.
I was thinking about this the other day because now the kids are so far out of diapers. I almost can't even put myself back in the seat of like will Lingley, being in such close proximity to human poop, like you would get like you know, like when you're changing a diaper, like sometimes you get on your hands and like that didn't gross you out. You were just like it's just, you know, just changing a diaper. But if anyone put their poop on your hand in any other situation, Yeah.
Yeah, you're not. You're not excited about that. No, no one's no one's looking forward to that.
I'm on the floor and you should get someone to help me if if I had stranger poop on my hand.
Yeah, yeah, do you remember when you do? You remember when you were like giving birth? Shandra Wilson was the person that told me this. She was the first person to ever tell me that, like some people poop when they get birth.
Yeah, making hard and being like sorre what.
And just wondering how I could prevent that from happening, like you know, and how like I could keep the magic with Matt if that happened, Like, how can you turn that into a flirty moment?
Like oops?
Do you know what I mean?
Like, there's there's nothing you can do, and you're in so much pain that I don't give a shit about the ship.
You're not and you're just gonna rely on a really swift.
Swimmers nurse to just get that out of there so your sex life continues.
Okay, we digress.
We digress.
I don't want anyone pooping or farting or no, do anything on the toilet really with the door open.
I do think there's potential when people move into that they kind of just like the body functions are like they've been let loose right, like they.
Are farting, they're burping in front of each other.
Well, because sometimes they fart in their sleep.
I mean that's hard. I'm talking about like a like I'm talking about a fart that's that's on purpose. Do you know what I mean?
Like you could hold it, you're choosing to let it rip, And that to me, do you know what? I'm gonna be honest, That to me tells me I don't know if you really love me. I just want you to know.
Then, for as long as you and I have known each other, you don't know this about me.
I cannot so laughing when you talk hearts? Is there something I don't know about you?
And the fart.
Funniest thing in the whole world? Like I can't sell.
No on the subject of it.
They're so uncomfortable.
That's why listen, this is part of moving in.
I'm telling you.
Because people conceal the fart situation when you're not living together and then you moved in and then you realize you're actually kind of a disgusting human being and now I can't have sex with you anymore.
Yeah. Yeah, it's yeah, it's a heart breaker.
And heartbreaker, oh my god.
Okay, So.
The other thing is, you know, I just I didn't need a man.
I can do this.
We're gonna get back on track, you know, Okay, aside from the farting and the and the whole, you know, the pooping with the door open, I'm just I have to say what it is. Okay, people's esthetic you can bump into you've moved in and they're like, no, the good Fellaw's poster has to be above the bed, and you're like.
You're like, no, god, yeah, yeah, we yeah, we didn't run into a ton of that.
No, Christopher is a very chic man. Christopher is not a good Fellaw's poster. Oh he's not above the bed.
No. No.
I had an ex that was a little Oh really he was wonderful, very sweet. But you know, our aesthetic was a little bit different. You know. It was very college still in our like mid twenties, which is fine because we couldn't afford anything, but you can still like make it nice your thoughts.
Yeah, No, it's the affording thing because like you know, you're growing like you're when you're in your twenties. You're just you don't have any money. I don't, and you don't judge anyone for not having money. Like you're all in the same place. You're all like starting out and figuring it out.
Yeah, but it doesn't cost anything to take the poster down, you.
Know what I'm saying. No, no, no, no no.
And home goods you can get like a cute little something. You can get a little you know, picture frame, situation on the wall. There are ways to do it.
When I was completely broke, I made places really cute.
No, I know, which is why you know what that leads into. I had a boyfriend who we started hanging out more, and I was over at his place a little bit more and I went into the bathroom and I mean, listen, these things can happen. The handles had like the silver or the stainless steel had like corrupt corroded, and so they had like the enamel on the top of it that said like hot and cold had come off. So they were kind of like whatever result whatever. But he had got out a sharp eat and on the tile next to the tourney things written an H next to the hot one and at C next to the cold one, which, by the way, usually it's universal which side they're on. And I just thought, you know what that feels.
Did you feel?
Did it?
Did it give you a little bit of an eck?
It was, yes, it was an eck. It was It feels cology, it was, it felt collogy, and it felt a little bit like listen, I like a trip to home Depot, and I love at home depot with a task at hand, and like going in there and finding the aisle where I'm going to get the thing that's going to solve my problem. And it's usually not that expensive. Oh you're talking, you know what, We'll fix that. Let's get you an H and a C. I don't know.
I just think that. Listen if I when I was broke the H and the C, if they I'm not, I'm no, no, no not. I'm not doing a sharpie. But I'm not bothering to go to home depot. I'm like, it is what it is. I rent this. Well, he bothered to put the h and the C in the sharpie because that is okay, I'm not defending it, but it doesn't take anything to do it, but to go to home depot, like I wouldn't know where, like how do you get the thing on the thing in the in the sync? You know, But I wouldn't do the sharpie. I'd just be like, that's life, Like figure it out. It's like a little surprise. Is it hot or cold?
Dealer's Choice Dealers Joys?
When you and Matt moved in? Did you did it? Just like was it all just magic?
And you know when we moved in, we had we had been dating for a little over a year, but we've been friends for a long time and my lease was up with my female roommate and I.
It was just time.
And so there was actually a little period of time, maybe three months before his lease was done, where we could go find something together, and so I moved into his one bedroom that he was renting. It was small, we had gus gus and I swear my memories there were like some of my favorite memories. It was just so it was just so cute and cozy and I loved it and we would go get beer and make you know whatever, dinner and just sit and watch, you know.
Whatever it was. I love those days.
And then but but Matt and I have very similar styles, like you know, for just living and what we think is not disgusting and is disgusting. And then even like our aesthetic is like very similar. But I think that's how you find the person. Yeah, yeah, and you develop you develop together.
Yeah, you grow together for sure.
Have you heard of this thing? I mean it kind of it kind of folds into our conversation. Have you heard of this thing called cuffing season?
What is that?
So it's now it's cuffing season?
Coffing Is it where you move in together for like the holidays?
It's basically like in the in the past couple weeks, like people have their fun in the summer, and then September rolls around and they're like, oh wait, who of the people that I'm seeing do I actually really like? And then you get it down to like a couple of finalists if there's multiples, and then by like October definitely November, you're you're you're you're.
Picking the likely the the lucky person, candidate is the candidate.
Yes, you're put you're picking your finalist and you're and you're basically you're giving that rose over because you're like, Hey, we're gonna we're gonna get cuffed, because you're gonna winter together in places like you hybernate together. Yeah, you're going to be like, oh, you're my person that I meet for like that cozy dinner. You're the person that's coming over and we're making the cozy dinner and watching the movie. And then I guess, I mean, I don't know. I wasn't single during cuffing season, but lots of people talk about it now. I think then are right around, like a little cocoon, you emerge from your chrystalis. Yeah, probably in the springtime, and then you've sort of at that point decided whether or not you're gonna be with that person or not. But I'm guessing there's a move in, probably during the like that, or at least like a mini move in, a capsure on mini move in.
I mean, this is where I'm thinking also that there needs to be a version of renting that is just the cuffing rent, you.
Know what I mean, Like there should be because the.
Problem is you're stuck in a year or two year usually I know, and what happens if it goes wrong? Where do you go? A winter cuff that you can just you understand what it is. And so either you come out of it and you're like, let's continue. This is a this is a temporary lease. It's a temporary hibernation. Yeah, yeah, we're going to try this out. It's a limited term contract.
Yeah, it's kind of like actors on television shows. You're hired by season.
You're hired by season.
Yeah, am I going to renew your contract? I don't know.
No, you don't know. If you're on the bubble, maybe you know, well, if you're farting, you know where it's probably gonna go. It's a cancelation.
It's a cancelation. It is a bye, thank you for your service.
It's yeah, you're not even getting moved time slots. You're not moving from a Sunday to or whatever. No, you're it's done. No, it was gonna be a whole fifteen episode season and now it's two. No.
But yeah, maybe it's just a promo.
It's it never makes it to air.
I think we should probably, I mean, I gotta tell you, I really love these submissions we got some good ones. We always do. I really I can't believe how I mean. Also, by the way, I see you all, and I really love your sense of humor.
They're funny.
Yeah, no, there's no, there's no one takes themselves too seriously, even the ones that are like maybe yeah, and.
I have to say, Justin and I we are obviously we text each other all the time, but we also text about you guys. We're like, dude, Amanda so fucking funny. Yeah, yeah, y she is funny. I love that, you know, so we we you guys really are part of our friendship circle.
And you know, someone came up to me, someone I did not know, came up to me on this last Friday and said, I really want to write in, but I just I know that you you guys probably don't read them. And I was like, whoo woo woo woo woo woo woo woo. Yes we do, Yes we do, so you got please please please please don't hold back.
Yes we do.
We We have access to the account, you guys, and we we get in there. Yeah, yep, all right, Anonymous wrote, I moved in way too quickly with my now boyfriend. The first six months. I could only go number two when he was at work. It was awful.
I feel this. I do.
I understand this because I'm a girl that like, I don't need you to ever know that that even happens. Not that I think that I should feel this way because this is normal bodily functions.
But I've never pooped, is what I.
Need you to believe, nor have I actually don't even know what you're talking about exactly.
Yeah, that's stressful. Those are the things that are a little bit stressful.
Yeah. I know there's a lot of people who also, but there's also a lot of people who can't go when they're not at home, right, Like, when they're at work, they're not going. So this was like, your home is the one place you're meant to feel totally free to do that. This interrupted that for her.
Yeah, I'm sorry in situation, I know.
Yeah, I think a lot of there's a lot of people listening to this that are like, yep.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, maybe you have a sign and you're like, hey, can you go take the dog for a walk? I'm gonna go. Yeah, yeah, Okay. Angela wrote in and she said, I love my husband, but it's not easy living with someone. I wish society didn't think it was weird or frowned upon separate living situations as a married couple. Sometimes I want to drink champagne and my PGS until five PM, maybe not shower and just binge eleven hours of TV. And not that I can't do that, but it's just different when SELS live there. Maybe I want to leave my dirty dish and to sink for a few hours while I do something else, but I have to think of my husband, who's a clean freak. I probably sound selfish, but it's just so hard for me. I don't think that sounds selfish.
I love this day she has planning.
I know I love this day also. I mean I have never had champagne in my PGS until five pm, and now I'm considering that a loss.
Yeah, that is a loss.
I think.
I think you gotta okay, So in.
This situation, I almost feel like you got to advocate for yourself. So Matt is it is very much cleaner than I am. I can leave dirty dishes in the sink for some time, not like days, but like I can leave. You know, they don't bother me. He's someone that's like chiast to clean it up. But I think that you have a conversation where you're like, listen, I'm not going to leave them forever. However, this is just my vibe. I know what your vibe is. But I think there's a little conversation to be had there. Jessica, you can you leave dirty dishes in the sink?
Yeah? And Christopher cannot cannot?
Yeah?
Yeah, no, I guess you gotta do a little contracting around that. Yeah, you're gonna be like, how what are your thoughts on this? Like what's our what's our minimum? Okay here? Yeah? Yeah, I mean I think that I used to be more like the dishes have to get done, But I do think there's.
Like there's just a little balance I'm in life.
There little upgrades as you mature and sometimes, yeah, you know, what's what's more important in this moment? Like me being, you know, right there next to that little chickadee while she's doing her homework and like being there or meaning with my back to her cleaning the dish. Yeah, not being a I don't know. And by the way, these are things you'd call audibles on every single day of your life. So sometimes you're washing the dish and sometimes you're sitting next to the chickadee. But I'm much easier. I'm much better at leaving it than I used to be.
I think. I think in this situation, you declare a declaration of independence, and do you say, today, this is what I need. I need eleven hours in bed. I'm gonna drink champagne and I'm gonna leave the dishes. And that's that's what I need today. That's gonna be my self care and that's gonna make me feel good. And I'm just letting you know because I feel like if you give them the heads up, then it is what it is. Yeah, I agree, And maybe he needs a day where he's like, you know what, I need a.
Day to do this, okay.
Lucy said we had been together for one year and decided it was time to move in together. We lasted one week and I've never hated someone more in my life. After that, every single thing he did drove me insane. It says where a mini move in does work, because if you know, in a week, if you got to spend some nights there, nights and days.
She was testing the water, and you know what she found out those waters were not for her.
But she wasn't testing the water. She was in the boat.
Wait what you know I mean, yeah, yeah, she'd done the move.
Oh I'm moved in, I'm saying, and then she hated him after a week. I'm saying, you do a duffel bag. You gotta do a duffel bag. Yeah, kind of mini move in like Jessica did. And then because that way you're not stuck in a lease. And then you know it's a complicated situation. All right, next that would be very, very.
Red I missed that part, Sorry, okay. Mary Anne wrote in she said, I don't think we talk enough about the grief we experience as women when we get married, move in and have kids, grieving our old life, even though we were excited for the next chapter, mostly because I think people will look at you like you're on grateful or something. I always joke with my single girlfriends who live alone and tell them to cherish this time in their lives, because that is the time of my life that I look back on and smile. Not to say I don't adore my husband and kids in the life we've built, but being a single woman, not having to answer to anyone or be responsible for anyone. Having silence in my own home, being able to watch, do and say whatever I want when I want. It was a time in my life that was simple and I really loved it. Does this make sense what I'm saying? Anyways? I love the pod and thanks for always keeping it real. Thank you for keeping it real? Yeah? Do you know this? This, this makes me think of the two things can be true. You can miss that part of your life and really cherish it, and you can also be very very happy for what you have and how much it brings you.
Yeah, I missed. You know what I really miss about that time?
I miss being sick?
Right, you feel sick and you're like, I'm just gonna I can take care of myself instead of me like snotting everywhere and my kids being like can I get a snack? Like I miss like the or like meaning to sleep in.
I've been around you when you were sick, though, I think you would like for other people to also take care of you. You would like to take care of yourself and be taken care of you. Just don't't have to take care of anyone else. Yeah, No, I know you're right. No, sorry, I was just pretty.
Yeah that yeah, of course not too everyone taking care of me, but the point is me not taking care of anybody else.
That's right. Sorry, sorry, sorry, carry on, carry on, get.
With the program.
So I understand that, but I think this, I think this feeling is really common with everybody. Yeah, I agree, and I do think. I don't think that there should be any guilt with that. I think exactly what you said. It's just you know, that means that you're at that part of your life too. Was fantastic, Yeah, a great part of your life.
True. I always say, I say, I hope that I'll be there to say that for my girls, and I say it for anyone else who you know will listen to me.
Yeah.
Also, you know what I think, you know, I think helps with this girl trips. I think you make a priority to take a t with your girlfriends like we are next week?
What okay? Okay?
Dawn says typical lesbian story. I basically went home with my partner the second night we met each other and never left.
She had just.
Gotten out of a four year relationship and I had never had a serious girlfriend before. Everyone thought it was a disaster waiting to happen and we've been together for six years on November fifteenth. Oh well, congratulations.
That's not the typical lesbian story. That's a typical that's a success story.
Yeah, that's not a mini move in. There's no duffel bag.
That's a full box, an extra large move in.
That's a U haul. See, that's what you hope for. And sometimes I think it just does it. Literally, it just clicks. Yeah, and it doesn't feel like and I think.
There has so much to do. Okay, let's I mean, I think that the building block of a great move in story is comparedive ability, right, Like if you're a combatible, if you're a compatible couple, then your chances of moving success are going to be high.
Yeah, you were like this rocky.
Romance right where there's like sticks, fireworks and sex and all the things whatever. Like you've got no guarantee about no, no, no, no, a successful movement story. No, there's no guarantee. It's it's a yeah, it's a gamble. It's a gamble with that, yep, a little more of a gamble, okay. Uh Arianna wrote in she said, horror story. I moved out of state with my still current boyfriend. But we put a deposit on a home to rent, moved four hours away out of state, and he left his Apple Watch at home and it was going off. So I looked at it and there were multiple women he was trying to hook up with because he didn't know if I was actually going to move in with him. Since we only knew each other for two months.
I mean, we got to break this down a little bit. Okay, first off, move out of state when you only know someone for two months, gamble being keep it.
I'm calling it what it is. It's a gamble m right.
The co mingled money. They put a deposit on a deposit in Yeah, four hours away, out of state, and he's not very responsible with his belongings, leaving that Apple watching home. I'm on with other girls. Ew.
Gross, it's all gross.
I think I think that there's again. I think the move in because it's a financial well. First off, unfortunately this girl uprooted her life right now, there's a financial investment. I think you got to give a guy more than two months. I don't think you know someone very well after two months. If Hayden was doing this, I'd be like no, yeah, and then she would probably just do it anyway.
H no, no, no, yeah, well, it's a horror story. She starts, she starts the story of it's a horror story.
It's a horror story.
But you know what better that she knows now, I do rather know. I'd rather see that apple watch.
You don't know when you're gonna write him a thank you note, but you will be writing them a thank you note.
Yeah, you'd rather write it sooner than later. Okay, Roger wrote, My ex and I were waiting on our new apartment to be finished. In the interim, we moved in with her parents about two weeks. We are no longer together because I realized in those two weeks that if I had these people as in laws, I would go absolutely mad. Please do an episode about in laws.
We definitely need to.
I'm surprised we haven't done one yet. Here we can again, no better.
I want to know what Matt thinks about your dad?
Do you know what? Matt loves my dad and I. It's confusing because it is you know, it is annoying because he does he thinks because it's it's like, you know, he gets to he's not blood related, so he gets to just kind of sit on the outside and be amused hysterical. R let's go back to Roger.
Roger, you had a little trial period, and you're gonna send it back after that trial, you know.
What I want to follow up?
Okay, So, Roger, I think we need to.
I want you to write in again because we're going to do an episode on in laws now. We clearly need to do one. I want to know in the two weeks what it was that made you go absolutely no way, this relationship is done.
And it had to have been big, because it's not like you live with your in laws. You don't.
Well, that's not true. Some people do have in laws that tend to like hop in and listen. My dad is an eleven hour flight away, but if he was close by, Martin Lennington would be over a little bit too much, if you know what I'm saying. So some people really like it is kind of like a move in with the in laws.
Yeah, oh god, meet the Fockers. That's all time funny.
It's yes, I need to we need to know more.
Roger. Yep, Roger, give us give us a y give us the scoop.
Okay, okay.
So, lastly, Anonymous wrote in. We moved in together. Then I noticed he washes all his dishes with cold water. Grossed me out. Wow, that's it, that's all she wrote.
You know what this is.
This is the dick. This is what we're talking about when things get a little specific and they're odd. Does cold water gross me out? Because remember when we did that episode and we talked about the velcrow wallet and I decided after that is anck. I've never thought about it before, but the sound of the velcrow feels like you're teenager, okay or five? Cold water water?
I mean, I just wonder. I just wonder if Anonymous. I just wonder if Anonymous is ever gonna be happy.
I wish Anonymous that elaborated Listen, you're not in love with somebody if now you're like the cold water. And also that's a very simple conversation, like, hey, you know what, let's use let's warm it up a little bit.
Yeah, this isn't like a make or break.
There's some fire on this problem.
Let's just literally just turn the other one on a little bit.
Yeah, teat it up. I want to see some team. I want to see some seam. I think it's a little extreme to think that that's a gross up.
But I think you already kind of hated that person. That's why I think. I think that you were already like everything they were doing was already bugging you, and then the cold Water came on and you're like, it's fucking over.
Yeah, that's the last straw.
I don't think it was like Prince Charming, Oh my god, he's so amazing, like, I can't wait. I think with the cold Water on, she was like, wait, stop everything.
No, no, no, not at all, not at all.
It's cracking me out. The crew we have the best I swear, we have the best listeners.
And the best ride ends.
Okay, I love Yeah, it's I mean, well this isn't this is like you know, it's it's a it's a deep topic. There's so many different various there's various things that can happen on a move in and and you never know, you just never know. It's a gamble you see to yourself that you didn't even know were there. It's true, it's true. Yeah, And I like my space. You know, for a long time, I was an only child and I was I like to be alone. Sometimes everybody needs to leave me alone.
Yeah, you need it.
Yeah, and then you had four children I know, I know, and a horse and a horse and dogs.
And somebody and dogs and chickens. No, but I see that now happening with Eve. She needs a little bit more alone time. And at first I was like, wait, what's happening, and then I was like, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's a little more time.
I think what we've I think in conclusion to this episode, I think that we we we need more mini moving.
Yes, yes, but you know, most of the time the people do the full movement, especially in New York. I have to say, especially in New York City because rent so high, it rent so much, and it's so hard to move. It's so hard to move. If you've ever moved to New York City, you know you don't want to do it again. You're literally like, I'll just stay here. They will find my body here one day.
They're like not absolutely hate this person doing it the cold water, but I'm staying. I'm sticking it out. Yeah, I feel you, yeah, listen, I feel you, all right. And now we have to do an episode on in laws because I do one.
Oh my gosh, yes, please, I should.
Have not come on.
I should have not come on for just like ten minutes just to give the loadown about my family, because his family are great. It's my family. It's an issue, but he loves it.
It's only an issue for you.
Yeah, well, I don't know. Let's let's have let's have him call it what it is.
Yeah, yeahright, I love it. And oh my gosh, we have to tell our listeners that when next week we get to go away together or.
We're going to come back with stories. Guys, we are coming back with stories. We're going to be doing I'm doing a sleepover in New York with Jessica. We're going to be traveling to Florida.
And yeah, well we will.
We will do a deep dive into that trip.
You will document it, we'll put on the stories.
Absolutely all right, Well let's call it.
Let's call it. The end of the episode.