The first time Hilary saw Tony, she thought he was homeless. He was alone in the park at dusk, cooking on a barbecue, looking like a man with nowhere to be. He lived in the penthouse at the top of the hill, with a car collection, 2,000 bottles of wine, and thousands of rally maps in alphabetical order.

For 40 years Tony was a rally car navigator, the person who knew exactly where to go at speed, every single time. Then his wife Liz died before they moved into the home they'd worked their whole lives for, and the man who knew every road in the world had nowhere left to go.

This episode is about destination change. The kind that comes from grief, redundancy, retirement, an empty nest, divorce, even success. It's about why having every skill in the world doesn't help if you don't know where you're pointing them. And it's about five honest steps to find your way back when the map you've memorised stops working.

What you'll learn

• Why a destination change is more common than you think
• How to spot the difference between a motivation problem and a direction problem
• The five honest moves to find your way forward when you're lost
• Why routine becomes a handrail when nothing else feels stable
• The one question nobody thought to ask Tony, and you should ask yourself

Timestamped highlights

• [00:00] The man eating alone in the park who turned out to live in the penthouse
• [11:00] The five ways most people lose direction without realising it
• [21:00] The wrong funeral, and what it taught Hilary about navigating

Bestquote

"He had every skill he needed. Clarity, decision-making, the ability to call a sharp turn at speed. He just never pointed any of that at himself."

Reach out here: https://hilarysaxton.com/