Trigger warning: Discussion and images of gun violence.

At 33, championship-level ultimate player and teacher Eileen Murray started coughing up blood—then spent a year being dismissed by doctors before hearing the word no one wants: lymphoma. Six months of chemo followed, buoyed by a community she’d spent years building on the field and in the classroom. Two decades later, driving to a friend’s wedding with her husband and kids, a sniper’s round blew out the back glass—missing her temple by a hair. No one died. It barely made the news. But the PTSD was louder than cancer.

In this blunt, compassionate conversation, Eileen unpacks the visions that foreshadowed her diagnosis, the rage and surrender of treatment, and why the shooting reshaped her parenting. She refuses to center the gunman—saving her anger for systems that fail and doubling down on connection: teaching her sons media literacy, checking their sense of belonging, writing them letters for the day she’s gone. It’s a story about cultivating community before you need it, and choosing grace over grievance.

Listener discretion advised: frank discussion of cancer, medical trauma, gun violence, and PTSD.

Eileen’s links:

Eileen’s ultimate frisbee team - https://www.nygridlockultimate.com/ 

Eileen also made a blog post about the shooting which you can check out here: https://www.nygridlockultimate.com/blog/wear-orange