Ashley admitted to something involving insects and the sun that she learned WAY later in life than she probably should have. 

Minnesota Twins ambassador Dick Bremer joined the show for his weekly appearance and told an all-time great Gardy story. 

We learned that a member of the Half-Assed Morning Show was once a member of something called "The Safety Team" here at work. 

We were talking weed with 4/20 coming up this weekend and Ashley taught us an important lesson when it comes to weighing weed. 

There was a story in the news of a kid who saved the life of his teacher. Josh played some audio of the heroic youngster but had to cut him off before he got controversial. 

Twins ambassador Dick Bremer made his weekly appearance, and we all shared fond memories about the gum in old packs of baseball cards. 

Searches for eclipse-related porn were way up a week ago for the big eclipse. More Anxiety Than Hair Jesus texted in a brilliant explanation about what eclipse sex really is. 

Josh confessed he used to hang around the guys who installed car stereos at the Audio King and told us about a very ill-advised car stereo purchase he made. 

We got on the subject of gross things your significant other does that you still put up with, and the classic debate about eating in the bathroom came up. 

We have our last chat of the season with Wild winger Marcus Foligno and he gave us an update after going under the knife last week. 

We had our weekly chat with Twins Ambassador Dick Bremer and asked him about his big first pitch at the Home Opener last week. 

We were talking about imitating our favorite athletes growing up and it turns out that's how Nick started drinking beer. 

We were talking about exes from the past and Nick had a very solid theory on why Dana dated some crazy women and Josh never did. 

We were talking hockey and Wappel dropped some analysis so profound that we won't be surprised if he starts working for the Wild soon. 

Our buddy Zach Parise is in town to take on the Wild and we asked him if he might hang up the skates after the season. 

Brad had a "hard out" on Wednesday's show and some people were confused for a second exactly what that meant. 

We were talking about unique ballpark features with Dick Bremer and someone brought up the hotel they have out in center field in Toronto. 

A kid over at NC State sent a hilarious email to his professor after their team shocked everyone and made the Final Four. 

During Josh's News segment, we played some audio of a police officer making a stop and remarked about how unbelievably calm they are in those situations. 

During the Stupid News, there was a crazy report about insects being found fully intact inside people during colonoscopies. That lead Nick to remember the time his dog ate bees! 

Every year, the Saint Paul Saints like to have fun with their pigs who bring out baseballs to the umpires during innings. They have a contest where people can submit their favorite pig name and then they'll choose a winner. 

Twins legend Dick Bremer kicked off his fourth year of talking Twins baseball with us on HAMS by telling us about how he is starting his own playing career. 

We were talking about the Pixar movie "Inside Out" and Dana shared a pretty relatable reason why he has never seen it. 

A woman got fooled by a fake parking ticket and the cops had to point out to her she missed one very obvious sign it was fake. 

A listener texted in and said if you add the word "anal" in front of your car model it's always funny. We tested that theory and found out he was right! 

A woman in Oregon got herpes on her hands from a manicure gone wrong, and for the amount of money she might get, we're pretty jealous! 

We talked to Farmington Mayor Josh Hoyt about his charity wrestling match over the weekend, and he issued a challenge to Pat McAfee of ESPN/WWE. 

There is a report Wrestlemania is coming to Minneapolis. So, Dana told the story of a time he terrified an entire plane full of kids when he went to Wrestlemania in college. 

We were talking about skiing and Josh told the disastrous story of the first and last time he ever went to the ski slopes. 

We caught up with our pal Marcus Foligno and informed him the fight he got into on Sunday was the 100th of his NHL career. 

A soccer coach got really bombed and made a fool of himself in Nashville, but maybe he wasn't being as arrogant as we thought. 

National Napping Day always follows daylight savings time. Growing up, most of us hated sleeping. Now we just can't get enough!

Every other Monday, The Half-Assed Morning Show has their resident doctor, Doctor P Jesus, in to answer health questions. This Monday he was asked about contraceptives.

The Ass-Man Randy Shaver called us right at the end of the show to make a big announcement and tell us how it will impact the Half-Assed Morning Show going forward. 

We caught up with our broadcasting pal Clay 'The Clayboy' Matvick and he shared a great story about Minnesota hockey legend Lou Nanne as he prepares to call his final State Hockey Tournament. 

We got into a discussion about the things you do that your significant other refuses to take an interest in and, as always, the Brother/Sisterhood delivered with some great answers. 

We had a conversation about the interesting or weird things you might find when going through a dead loved one's possessions and there were some awesome finds. 

Charles Barkley finally broke down and started an Instagram page and he got his balls busted by his cohorts. Much like what we did to Brad when his Twitter account got brought up. 

We were chatting with our bud Marcus Foligno of the Minnesota Wild and we asked him about a recent survey all the players took that determined who on the team is least likely to pick up a check. 

An Oklahoma state trooper might have just set an unfortunate record for the amount of times his car has been hit. 

They recently had the inaugural Florida Man Games down in Florida, so we started picturing what a Minnesota Man Games would look like. 

We had a bit of technical difficulties during the show Friday. Thankfully, Wappel was quick to fix it before Nick pointed out he shouldn't have done that. 

Josh had the perfect answer when he was asked which of Sly Stallone's daughters he finds most attractive. 

The dating rule of thumb says that a 22-year old would be technically in Wappel's age-range, but he said he could never date a 22-year old. We had good news for him... 

A thief inadvertently stole a bunch of Corvettes. Not to be confused with the Chevette though. Those are very different. 

We got to talking about awful ways people have been dumped and we learned once again that kids can be the worst. 

Dictionary.com added a bunch of new words to the dictionary and Josh was VERY confident he knew some of them. 

The snow made for a rough commute Thursday morning, so we were sharing some of our favorite stories about spin-outs during snowstorms. 

Marcus Foligno of the Minnesota Wild joined us and we talked about the jerseys the team is auctioning off for charity. Marcus has a unique strategy to make sure his goes for a big pile of cash. 

Ashley blew us away today when she revealed what her church parking lot was used for back in the day.