Kyle Dunningan (Inside Amy Schumer) joins Arden and Erin to discuss a vanilla horndog's tour through Tuscany! Ugly champagne flutes! Mascara Tears! I love that! - Arden wants to run away with Guilio the Truffle Hunter for a life of pasta, puppies and making sweet amore!
- Erin thinks "That's So Italian." made her want to jump off of a bridge!
- Kyle is busy- he is talking to Mother.
All that plus....... TWEET OF THE WEEK!!!!!!!!
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I'm sure we can learn Alex the Hot Rush and or somebody to come climb like a Reese's money. So go to bio clarity dot com so you can be shiny and glory when you meet him. Rose. That's for the first month. Okay, bye, no entering Stockholm. Oh yeah, so good? Oh my god, this is an exciting reson. Don't turn it down, Erra, It's gonna be louder. I missed you guys, and I will. I'd like your chet this climmdia to your in there. I want to feel uncomfortable. I can't wait to take Katie to Cobbos. Come lookin bad You're so good. Welcome you guys will be listening. Hello lovers, Happy Valentine's Day, Lovers, habby v D Jay Lovers. My name is Arden Marine. I am back in the comic book store where I belong. I'm out of the Atlanta I know my hair, did you guys? Okay? I feel so beach. I don't know what to do. Tie it up to my right is um. I wasn't sure. Thank you so much because I wanted to. I wanted I was like I was gonna say Julie, I was gonna say Vanessa. I was gonna say Lauren z U A lady that I adore, that I have traveled the world with that I have forced to spoon with me in a hotel in Nashville. Miss Aaron, Yaron, I missed you in person. You missed Debbie Ryan. Debbie Ryan we had for the first time last week and she was a real fan favorite. I googled. I googled her, and you're right, I'm not gonna be able to sit directly across from So I just did very in Atlanta with this like former Disney star who also happens to be a rascal, and she'd never watched The Batslor and she agreed to watch it, and she was tardy, and I had warned Anna had to go get her. And I'm like, look for the prettiest human, Like, she's so much better looking than any person you've ever met. Rob Benedict was thrown talking. I warned Aaron that she wouldn't. It's like looking into the sun, like it started complicated when pageants paget st across. I have, like like Kyle pretty theory, Yeah, because you look at yourself and you're like, I'm alright, looky, that's the thing. Calibrate. But then when you see the actual gorgeous person, you recalibrate. I was on a plane and Thour walked in, you know, with this Thor hair and like flipped it back and like Chris Hemsworth one of those. Is he the one that's marrying Mighty? His wife walked into she's a model, and I was kind of staring at them, and I recalibrate. I went in the bathroom and kill yourself. Did you put your face in the toilet? Hit blush? Um? You might this the man to my left? Who you here? Who just got shamed by Thor? We love him so much, We save him. This was like a special episode. He's such a personal favorite of ours. He's an Emmy winner for being on the program with Amy Schumer. And then you've been writing for Sarah Silverman show Haven't You? Mr? Kyle dot Again? Is my favorite podcast? We love you. We were texting Kyle and Aaron have have obsessions with sinkholes, and I was texting Kyle and Aaron over the holidays about the crocodiles in Asia that we're coming out of people's toilets and eating people's assholes. Whoops? Do you remember that? Maybe I just was tacking ayowas and I didn't text anybody. I was like, I've heard of that. I'm not sure I received a text. You did. I texted you. I saw when when I was when I was giving you guys the time for today. The last thing we had at our group text it was all about. It was all about somebody like something like a like a crocodile coming out of a toilet and like stan up or something and like and like a girl happens. We did, it did and we have with us, not only Scout, who we love so much, a woman that we learned that her hair highlights so naturally so often that she can't she used to calibrate how often she goes into the sun. My little beach Bob, my bunny, Miss Katie Levin Katie, is it fucked up that I want to take you to Cobbos Don Lucas with a crape full of lemons and I want to just squeeze lemons in your hair and just like make it develop and just like do it like an Instagram post a day about you. No, No, I think that's a great idea. I'm think in that tonet, But overall, I we don't care. I'll just die right back, and I hate it's like four tickets to Comba. Oh my god, I'm we're gonna go right to Cobba. I love Sammy Hagar, I love a Kabba wabb about Turks and Cakos, but it sounds I feel like I feel like in the nineties people would go there and like fuck it club men. Yeah, now it's a little bit more cobo. I drove in behind somebody that I thought was you, that was flat brimmed hat and at a giant prism cross hacking from his mirror, and I was like, look at Kyle's giant prism cross. That is cool, Like that's just that's what he just sucking rolls with the giant prism cross. You don't have a giant glass cross from and I wouldn't wear that kind of hat. The whole thing I was like is so uncont I felt like a Kyle driving in and his in his Honda Civic with you a little bit of a mysterious that's gonna have you could have a prism you get pictured Kyle with a giant Prism cross in his car, all aggressively non religiou. Yeah, yeah, but I picked her. You somebody giving it to you and you like, yeah that you're driving around this giant like like Crystal Cross. Let's get one for Kyle. Do you guys have anything to promote Alexa? Get order a prison cross? Yes, motoring? Do you have anything you want to promote? Aaron? In one week February seventh, Ory, I'll be doing a long, long, fun show at the Hollywood Improv Lab. You can't go eron. She's the best stand up going. You'd be fucking lucky to see her. I just went sorry the other night. Kills it every time, Kyle, do you have anything you want to promote? I'll be in Baltimore next week. This week what is hanging out so this weekend? Thursday? Stand up competent kills me? Yes? Is it? Mgoobies? Yes? Will not book to me. I do not get booked on the insane. But here's what I have. I'm going back on tour, guys. I'm going to be at Hiena's Dallas six and seven. I'm not going to be in Alaska at Fairbanks and Anchorage. Let me warn you about Alaska because I've done three tours there and they act like, oh, go here, then hop over here. Not the case I did. I did a show and Jerry no, just like just a show. And my age was like, Hey, onto this other show. It's in this other city, and how far is It's like nice money? I was like, I got on an airplane. I was on the airplane for three and a half hours. In between in between gigs, like to another gig. It's like three times as big as Texas. I don't like that they make it small on the map when you do the work you know I'm doing. I'm doing one night in Fairbanks and one night in Anchorage. It's and they all dropped drive, which I respect, but it scares me because it's I used to be and dark. Yeah, you're gonna be fine. I don't think you're in the same place. But it's like I have a show and I had to and in Alabama, okay. And then we're gonna be at Moontower April twenty one. We don't know a day yet. The tickets are not on sale for our podcast, but we will be doing stand up there as well. It's gonna be so far a right, guys, guys, I want to be involved. Do you want to come? I mean I can't, but like I want to be involved. Okay, you'll be involved. Speak like you guys are doing stand up together and everything. Yeah, and then we're doing Yeah you want to come? Yeah? Can you come? Let's get to a moontower. It's the weekend of April TWENTI want to come. Let's get you on there. We'd love to have It's really fun. Where's my favorite of all? Austin Awesome Texas. We have so much fun doing the pod live. Then we do Barbara on, we go, we go down. We fucking kill Moontower. We kill it. You should calm. Why don't you come. Let's see if we can get We'll reach out to Colleen. Tell Colleen it was she runs Moontower. She would love you. I love that you. I imagine you're sitting watching The Bachelor with your notepad. Look at that and she gives away her her notes. Here's what I want to talk about before we get going. Um, we just talked briefly about it last week. Overall, before we get going, Becca, I'm missing on a pop farm thoughts. I was, and then then all the memes of her on the milk carton it was. It was, it was so intriguing. I had so many questions, what did you guys? We all loved it. We loved second because at the time it seemed like she was still in the running. I'm like, why would why Like I thought she was gonna be fucking Ari and Scottsdale. Why why did she come up with the lie that I was a weed farm? But it got so much more exciting. Wait, I'm beachey but smart right now, just put glasses on. She's already very smart. But she went I think you got she went from Beachy to Princeton. Wait, let me ask you this. Yeah, we did. She disappear on the pop farm right after leaving the batch before after November. They were done before that, all right about this? She went missing in Humboldt County. Her mom. Her mom called the police. She told her mom she was gonna be working on a weed farm and that she was going to be like not available. But but they couldn't get in touch with her find her. And she didn't even look like herself. Her nose was wider and she was wearing peacock earrings in it. But that's why I thought it was before the tapic. No, it was after from because Laurie our Bachelor history but then wait, that's a current picture of her. That was her driver's license number. Two. People have been emailing in. I asked them last week to tell me what arts tattoos are. Get ready for the most vanilla thing you've ever heard. I don't know what the drawing is on his ribs, nobody could figure it out. But the numbers on his arm, he has a Jean Belle Jean lame is tattoo. No what the number John val Jean? He said he won't say why, but he says Jean Belle Jean is very personal to him as a real her in Scott's Dale. What do you name? Trying to make I'm trying to make the connections? Wait, but what are the I don't know what the prison numbers is? John bel Jean's prison number. Jean Jean known for like he wasn't La Misses, I wasn't he even he was like a revolution guy. Didn't he fuck any rock? Or like he fucked what's her? Uh? The Anne Hathaway, that's what he's No, Yeah, I don't I don't know. Maybe are Hathaway and that's what he's known for. Jean the he's the lead guy. But he but he hatedly. Miss I slept through it. You know what, I long ago. I don't even remember the feat. No, it's no Jesus Christ super sorrow. There's no joy and there's no Judas. If I die and I don't play, tell me what's happened? You want to know, don't you? Mom? About of you? John? I love? We should do an evening at your house recently kind of play Judas. Yeah you're doing that live on TV. I saw it on Broadway. I played Munches pilot in high school. I'm tone deaf, but I like him. All who did you play? I didn't do that musical, but I did in high school? We did The Whiz. Yes, I played the Scarecrow. Wasn't an all white cast of the Whiz. We're like, come on and come on Connecticut, Connecticut. And they cast her as a as a as a dwarf. We had one black girl in Olish school during this gray superstar and they cast her was like the sexy dancer for King Herod and I was like that made me uncomfortables. For Crystal, we did a flower drum song was all Asian play, and we did another play that was all Jewish. We did all these plays that were not white people. Oh my god, wow, did you participating all of them? Yes? Okay, Kyle, how are you liking this sea? Okay? Side note, here's one more thing. I asked why. I asked the fans where Crystal was screaming in the van. Apparently people went digging, but they didn't show her freak gut in the van, she kept screaming. Hashtag not Peter is what she was screaming. That's good, Oh my god, check out. She thought everyone thought I was gonna be Peter from Rachel's season and then he wouldn't do it. So apparently she was screaming ari in the van. Hashtag not theater? Are fans are the best? Our fans are like Jessica Fletchers. How about that? That's right, Jessica Fleta, Jessica from Chebot Cove, Maine. Hey kiss, That's that is some good digging. John Valjean and hashtag not Peter, which one's better? They're both great. Jean Valjean is very surprising. Jean Valjean is very surprising. Hashtag not theater is a great insult. And we will be covering the Bachelor Winter Games. It'll be up The podcast will be up Thursday. It starts tonight. I could not be more excited. If I played Jean Valjean in high school. That explained when you saw him at at the Have you even watched the whole season? Have you? Do you remember him last week in the top hat with the blue live he seemed to really joy that. Maybe Jean in high school he has a flair for the theatric. That was the whitest thing I've ever seen with him in that top hat. And he picked the pot girl. He picked Becca Becca m a m. She looks like like Emma Page if Emma Page was like a tiny boy. Who's em A Page? Is that her name? Emma Page? Emmaston? No, Pa, yes, Ellen Page. I know she was going to win. I thought he was going to just really even though watching him comfort her crying last night was like watching a child and a father. What's happened? We have to read this, okay, Jean Valjean. Yeah, because you get confused. We've seen a lot of musical and it's not I don't know how to love him from Jesus Christ Superstar Jean Valjean. Yeah, protected, but I could remember his character. It's it's Hugo, Victor Hugo. Obviously. The writer picks the character's nineteen year long struggle to lead a normal life after serving a prison sentence for stealing bread, defeat his sister's children during a time of economic depression, and various attempts to escape from prison. Though is known as the blah blah um Okay. So then he fights with the police guy um and oh yeah, and he attempts to return him to prison. Ah yes, yes, yes, interesting in tet like maybe Emily Maynard was his prison and he stole the bread crumbs by leaving his like notebook for her that she didn't read. And then he went and did like a theater production of Lanz with Jordan Rodgers, and he was doing damn a little bit of a stretch, but anything's possible. It is interesting though this this character is literally the epitome of like French aristocracy verse common man for economic depression in the French Revolution. And how how does he connect to that whatsoever? He's like a privileged car driver slash from Scott's Tale. But I think he was in it in high school. I think that's a good cast. That. Yeah, Lourie a new tattoo. Do the Okay, we have to have our fans go back and look and find out because I don't have to that the other day was right here on giant is a giant interest, say Jean Valjean is his numbers, his numbers. Okay, guys. Overall this season, which was so boring, is now was so good. Over give me. I really couldn't believe. I know, I'm jumping to the end. I couldn't believe Becca got cut. I couldn't believe. I couldn't believe it. I couldn't believe I thought he wanted to suck her in fantasy suite. Yeah, it's a very disturbing, you know you're saying. When she comes crying to him, it was very father disgustingepy, just take a don't give up on me. If she had said, like Marcia took my dollar, would have felt more like yeah. And then it was like she was showing her youth because someone was like, I don't think you're ready. Let's do like what an adult would dough say, like I'm not ready Ferrari in marriage? Wait, am I the lady? Yeah? Okay, because it's always suspect, this is just what an adult. Would we don't. I don't know. I don't know if I'm ready. No no, No, No, Kyle No, Kyle, Kyle, Kyle. Okay, Becca Becca, I just feel like I take this really seriously. I'm from Arkansas, my name's to you, and I just feel like, you know, as an older sister, I don't think that you're in it to win it. You're not ready for marriage. Okay, Well I feel like I am, but you know you're in your opinion? Okay, does anybody want to pet my fake possum on my shoulder? I was playing Kendall. You were so real. Kendall's not in that scene, Kenda. She's from the couch, a crazy person. Okay, they're a crazy person. Kendall is so grounded. Okay, here we go, let's let get started. Here we go. So they're Antuscany. The preview of the episode, there's so many tears. They have the knockoff version, like an ABC cheap version of the opera, Like, oh no, Gold Gold, Like that's a girlfriend who sang that song endlessly? Go ahead? She did. Yeah, it's a very famous It was in a room with a view. Did you make love? She sang it? Yes, endlessly, endlessly, and he goes, I love it. He's so fucking do I love Italy? I mean, what's not to love? It's beautiful here, That's what he said. It's the most generic sentences. He can only produce greatest hits. Them show into like a movie script and he like read it. You would think there were pages missing because it goes from like the dialogue, like exterior Florence whatever. This is beautiful. Oh yeah, I like it. This flowers nice. Next scene, I've never been more in love in my life. You'd be like, wait, it's something I missed. We've all missed it. We've all missed it the proof because nothing happens. It's very Italian. Oh my god. So they walked up to there in pizza the lady Tower beats Italy. Lauren goes, why do you think it's leaning? She's even more boring than I don't. It's literally like tagg in for who wants to like make Aaron throw herself off the balcony. First, I'm they're perfect together. I literally, I literally was like, they are magic. So then when Chris Harrison walks up in his corduroy blazer, he's fully giving up He's like, you guys, hometown dates or next there's gonna be no road ceremony. Three one on ones undergrowth up. His soul is so dead. They could just do the hologram thing like a Tupac but like the voice of Chris Harrison Spader Genser with the voice of Chris Harrison, and there's a row. I mean, but he's been voting it in since the seventies, I mean he is. He has just lost it. So then the three weirdest one on one. The first one is Becka Kay who he rolls up in an MG at the Renaissance Hotel after the girls. It was like, I've been a Tuscany. It's magic. There's all these old magical castles that are sort of falling down and they stay at like the Ramada of and they have to jump on beds and be like, wow, Tuscany, I said. And then Jacqueline goes, it's like a Jersey hotel in text and she goes, it's Jacqueline is like actually said this phrase, I'm on the precipice, which was a big word for the Bachelor. I feel like I'm deciding to fall in love, but am I just falling in love to fall in love that's coming up that. I think that was a moment of clarity. Yeah, somewhere in it was like, I just I really like being on vacation, but I don't know this person. Yeah, I thought that was like a good she logic. She forgot she was on a reality show. She forgot temporarily forgot the rules of the reality. You should go, I love you. It's been twenty four hours. I feel like people like Peter was the first one who like, like you really kind of wait a minute. So then he picks up Becka k and An mg Orn Alfa Romeo to remind us that he's a race car driver and they'd take her to Bonga, a cute city, and he goes on diamo, which means, let's go. I can't. I can't. He's just here. I'm gonna say one redeeming thing at the end of the episode. I'm not talking about the end of it. I'm just saying the four women and he picked I thought this, this, this makes me like him, because those four women were fantastic, not Lauren. Three out of the four, he's got three great choices. At least, you know, I got he didn't pick Crystal for four Crystal Chelsea and the Tea, you know what I mean, Like it could have been so bad. So I thought, well, that's a redeeming struggling. He's happy, he's super appable, but there's no there there. He's I truly think you could say ex addict. He is really Yeah, I like because I feel like he only is interested in making out. He loves to hear the women say to them, I love you, like it's all about him. He doesn't ask any questions of anyone. He has no curiosity about anyone, and he has no look at this that's excited. He wants to be prison tough. I'm going to get that. That is gonna it's But once I realized that it's like John like lame is and not like an actual prison head. So they're like, wait, you've got a lame is interested. So then he drives up and as if someone she's like failed him, He's like I missed that romantic connection. It didn't really stick with like Becka k So we're gonna walk the city with no plan, and I thought, oh, she doesn't stand a chance, Like he doesn't have any plan. And at first there was no person in the city. It was like an abandoned city. Um. I was like, did they clear the streets of Italy just to like film? That was the weirdest thing. And then they found like the man that was going to give him the piccolo bread and then and then sall in it. Yeah, and then and then he's like, so, I fun, I go to hometown. See what I meant? So you go to San Diego, you know, I'd be really And he's like, I like that. I'd like that. Like everything he says is I like that. Like that. It's like he's got five sentences to use throughout the like that. It's like Anchorman. I like lamp the setup. It doesn't matter who they put and I'd like, I think I can improve the show. Talk to him an idea, because you put all these women in one house that you can only talk about one guy the whole time. They rely on him to they can leave if he comes and says they can leave, you know what I mean. So it's almost like Stockholm syndrome. You have to fall in love with this guy. I think they should put in there someone that that would be repulsive to women on a visual sense, you know what I'm saying. And at first they come out of the mean the bachelor's repulsive. Yeah, he's disgusted, he's funny, like, do you have a good personality? So he's gross, but he's got a good personal casually cool. They come out of the limo, they're like, oh my god, no, I can't do this, and da da, and then the guy's like, I know, like your type, but let's just hang out a good time. But a week two, like he's funny, Like I like him. Guy like, I'm not kissing him. No, no, no, week through three Tuscany, it's suddenly like I like I'm having I like him. They would, And then by the end you have this disgusting man just sending these gorgeous women home like get the funky get and they're crying and it's disgusting. Yes, loves, get the funk out of here. I take you know what, actually take that? People. I always to think we're close to that. I actually think that women are competitive enough that like someone would that disgusting dude. Yeah, we're heavy petting to be crying for him. After four weeks, I think I remember there was like like there was like a hot kind of cool like promiscuous girl in high school that like fucked kind of like some gross dude, you know, and then like all the girls are like oh he like girls are like packing out. You guys need one alpha hot chick to lead the way. You could hire her one planets like, yeah, you're right, it's gonna be somebody. It's almost like now Evan wasn't gross, but at first Carly was not feeling it. And then eventually if Paradise she gave in. And now they're having baby. My dame, I have a baby. Yeah, I'm really I'm really trying. I'm trying with Ari, dude. But wow, well you know again he looked at the transcript. You'd go, well, this is the most boring people on the plant. There's nothing happening. But like, is he more boring than Ben Higgins or Nick? They were so fucking boring. I don't know they were, but Nick. Nick brought something to the table that Ari wasn't. The last season he was like five agomes Peter was last season. He wouldn't do it. The thing about I don't know, I mean, he's exactly Nick was boring, but he wasn't there. There was thing he was great on Caitlin season, but as the Bachelor, he was so boring because he was bored, he was checked out Ari. To me, at least I found Nick more interesting than Ari. This is a better season. This is a better season. He actually feels like, do you want to do you? I I've always liked Nick. You have always like if I could hang out, hang out with I talked to him on the phone, I know, and I got so nervous, there's something, there's something interesting to me about I had to call n I had to call Nick on the phone because I was trying to get him to do sketch for us or I had to call him on the phone, like I like hunted him down on Twitter. So he like dem me his message. He was like call and it was literally like I had asked him like six weeks before. He never replied to me. And then like two days out he was like, I might go call me. So I'm like in texts, I mean in Atlanta working, So I was like, all right, So I didn't have much time, so I called him. Was like that was fast. I was like, I'm on a different time. I'm just trying to get shipped done. This is two days like, are you coming or not not not coming? I'm not saying these are things we do, we do, we get them, but he played hard to get okay anyway, So then they started kissing and he's like, I don't want you to give up on me, and he goes and she goes, I care about you, and he's like, passion is fleeting. Um, we found that passion ages ago, but isn't enough. And then they went dancing, and then he's like, to not today. You want to make sure we don't slide back from today. I mean, like, how could you slide back? My dick doesn't slide back in my parents like you've had a good afternoon, how bad could be five to seven? You question all your life choices and slide back into And then he like and then he did then and then he did the leg behind the next sexy like wall kiss, and then he like kissed against the wall, which is his move. Are you creeped out by his other move, which is like the hand that sort of like the Frankenstein hand on the shoulders. I'm so grossed out by him. Such a hard approach, like if he was like landing hand so caresses the shoulder and then everybody's shoulder goes. It's hard entry because it's also like it's like it's aggressive, but it's like too soft. It's like, if you're gonna be aggressive, just be aggressive, like if you're gonna like give her, like if you're gonna do that. The girl's given me the all yes signs, like just give her kids. There's something a little to like he just laughing yeah, and then the soft pine like sweaty, long fingered palm. I could just see there's a big batchel thing. They licked their lips. Then the kids is disgusted. He does. Katie's nodding her head. Katie, tell me everything, Katie, my mom noticed, tell me. She like texted me and she goes, have you noticed how he licks his lips before he kiss you? It's so gross? Really, I did not notice that. Your mom like if my mom likes him? Does your mom like him? You know? I told her that I didn't like him. I told her that, like Anthony watched port Hman was like this is within two seconds. He was like, he's the most boring human ever. She's like, oh, I don't think he's so bad. Mom's like him. Mom like him, but She's like, he could be worse. My mom like him. She thinks he's very indifferent to him, you know he what I what I do like about him is like he feels like and also based on his choices, like he's not a dick. No, you know what I mean. I think he's he's sure. I think he wants to he wants to phone. Alright, God, you do you want that? Do you want that dead hand through his silver? By right? I was watching you on stage and I said to Lisa de Larius, I was like, Aaron is such a fucking fox, like you must kill it on the road with the ladies. Oh, Aaron, there got you. I really want a three way with our Oh my god, I feel like I feel like Aaron is a limis test like you know, like I feel like everybody has some gay in them and Aaron is a lim. I've seen so many straight ladies be like, wouldn't I can't hurt called lady dance into like some fucking win and they bring my heart and I'm still single and I am now you are in a way you are. I can hook your heads, you can find a lady for you. Oh my god, I want a lover of the lady. You need a lady with a job, with lady with a job. You need a lady with later with the job. You need a later the job. You need a later the job, your lady with the job, later with the job. And I don't want to have this conversation. So then they go back to the hotel. Nothing. I don't want nothing. But I'm the one that's doing nothing. You gotta go to work. I'm the one that sits around doing nothing. So then what is that, Oh, dear lord, this is to stop. Okay. So then the hotel. Rob Ryness is my buddy that was at my home. He's such a dick. I love him so much. He's such a rascal. He's probably calling about the beast like fighting. Okay, So then they go back to the hotel. Jacqueline's having swirling doubts. I'm worried I'm gonna end up, you know, And this is a legitimate, a legitimate fear. I'm weird. I'm gonna end up married in Scottsdale. To you, I don't know what we have is real. I don't know how to stay if that's the case. And then he goes, are you scared of me. She was like, no, why would I be scared at the possibility of marrying you in Scottsdale. And then she goes, I really like you, and he goes, oh, this stork, I'm going to miss you. And then he's like, I'm blindsided. And then he goes, if you have any regret, you can come back to me if you're the girl that he picks, like the woman that he picks, like you don't want to like the open door of like if Jacqueline comes back, are you gonna go funk? Jacqueline. I thought that exchange was like so well, it was a good it was because I agreed with her, But then it felt like then she was like I put that on? Who just that belonged to? Can I wear that? Yeah? I left my sweater in the car. But then it was like a legitimate like what she was feeling, what she was saying was like strong, good choice, totally legitimate. Then she's like crying and going I'm gonna I'm gonna change my idea in three minutes, and You're like, no, don't just stand in the truth. You don't want to meet, you don't want to marry Mick fu toast in Scott's sale because her vibe she felt when she was like, I'm going to med school for six years, stand by that, and I want to schedule. I need you to be unemployed. And my friend Brendan Smith pointed out that I'd just give me a shout because I think he was is that that he just wants a baseball wife, like a hot blonde baseball wife, which is basically emily meaner. And I want to be that baseball wife, but not too arid. I'm done working, you guys, anybody else done working? Yes? Oh my god, I actually though I would be. Do I feel good? I feel it's like, oh my god, am I with okay? What is sorry? But like the why do they immediately break up When she's like in six years, I'll be free, It seemed like, yeah, we're gonna be a long distance for six years. No, it didn't make sense. I just wanted her to be like standing her choice and not going to hypnosis of the show. And then she was like weeping in the hallway and she goes, I came here open love. I didn't expect it. He was so unbelievably lovable. Hi, Ari, You're perfect in every way, and I still don't think I can marry you. And then Kendall starts weeping, and then she Jacqueline says, I kind of suck at being happy. It's like I feel like Kendall and Jacqueline fell more in love than Jacqueline. You got do you guys suck up being happy? And opened that question up so I can torture myself. Sometimes you seem happy, don't. I'm crazy enjoyed being Why did I like being happy? I do a twenty pound weighted blanket for my anxiety. I'm pinned under it. I'm like a smooth, cool cue cover. I do think though, if I if I need activities, yeah, I need something that I'm working on. I need some focus. I need if I'm doing something or if I have something that I'm engrossed in that I'm excited about, that I'm happy. Yeah. The mind is pathological, trying to destroy us if we give it any idle time. I know I like a little downtime, and I need a little downtime every day, like I need a little retreat, quite quiet. But I need some structure I need. I don't do well with nose struck. I have a routine that I do. Star First, I get up and I make a shake, the same shake every morning. I have one piece of raisin cinnamon toast. It's got spinach, strawberries, peanut butter powder and banana. A peanut butter you always have. I love peanut butter. I love a nut butter. Then I take my bicycle and I go down to Starbucks with my backpack and computer, and I jerked off a bell on the bike. You jerk off for your library in your back It's all downhill by the time I get to the bottom of my climax. I first started and I try to write something funny. Usually my my computer is on two percent battery and it dies in three minutes. What kind of stuff do you write? What do you rate? Comedy? Hand up scripts or stand up both? What are you working on now? I actually write, like I spent some time writing like Instagram videos? Actually you do? You do? You have a good Instagram feed? I just like I like to do it. I'm like, let me just like spend a little time trying to write stuff, and then I go to the gym and I get fucking huge. It doesn't happen naturally, but that's a desert. That's a full day. What do you pay for? And then and then it's like six pm. Yeah, it's pretty late. Okay. So then I talked to a mother, of course for a couple of hours. Ye, you talked to mother for a couple of hours. And you've got a dog, don't you? Yes, named Olive? And does where does all have fit into that? Next to mother? She's my best friend. Okay, how's mother doing? Wonder his mother still married? No, my father died. Don't feel bad as a long time. My father died in August. I just completed my first book. Guys, I read a book. I couldn't concentrate after he died. I did actually write a book. Three years I read. I read a first I've actually never read two books. My attention span got shot when he did. If anybody we talked about it was the only podcast about grief from the Bachelor. I literally had. I just kept up the schedule. So I did it. I did it. I did it. It's been the only podcast about grief in the Bachelor. So here's how I checking off anybody's grieving. So I'm six months out, I'm doing much better. My attention span was really shot. I started a bunch of books I like to read, and I haven't the first book I read. Somebody gave me the Joan Didion Grief books. I read, but that was good. That was good. Again, it was short and it was like, oh, you can't concentrate. It was like, I can't what's the highlight of that book. I'm just curious. She lost her husband and then her daughter. It was terrible. How to get through grief? Did it give you? No? But it was more like it was short enough that I was like it made me feel not crazy, of like, oh, I'm a little crazy right now. And and this is like this too shell like it was like, oh, it's almost like a symptom. Yes, you're magical thinking. And then I got through my grief by bachelor podcast. I'm watching The Great British Breakup and karaoke, and then I then to the No the Narrative book. I am like one chapter left, but I'm almost done. It's a big victory for me. He remember, it's really good. It's like it's like a thousand tiny fires or something. It's really good. I can't remember the name. I'll I'll tell you the name next time. It's really good. But I've almost finished a book. I can't believe I'm back in the game. After my father died, my mother called me like a month later and she goes, you're not going to believe this. Your father left a hot dog in my microwave. And she just thought my ghost came down from heaven. Was like, I know what I'll do. How did he die? How did he die? How did he die? That's awful, It's terrible. Don't recommend it. I wouldn't recommend death in general. It's not especially a long painful one. I had a long painful one. I actually thought death. He died for very long period. It took like three years ultimately, even it was a variety of things, who know, probably probably cross of the lever coupled with like and then ded dementia, diabetes. It was not how I would recommend some but it wouldn't say it was my favorite hot dog. He actually would age like he would age like Russell Stover's, like chocolate Santa's, Like how do you say there was like a collection of like chocolate Santa. He would age his food. He had, he had all sorts of things. But anyway, yeah, I wouldn't recommend. It wasn't. But I will say having a bachelor podcast, and it was actually like start a bachelor podcast when you have a family member past, everybody's everyone, it's a good outlet. You know. My mother, mother, mother, she was making a hot dog and forgot. The next morning, woke up and open the micro and it was like, oh my god, imagine hot dog from heaven. Go ahead, Oh my god. So she you think she left it for herself? Of course she put the hot dog in there. And she's still has she dated. No, But there was like my mother, maybe she likes attention from men. Like she was all dressed up to church and she sparkled like, let's like at Christmas tree. And one day she came and she goes, well, all the men at church look at your mother like she's one bag of lollipop. Yeah, she likes the attention from it, but she doesn't want to like date. That's so good. I'll show you the best. Okay, okay. I like the idea of Grief Island, Grief Island show, and just about where she put her she put herself. I put myself on Greef Island like a bunch of singles on that have just gone through something off, so you're like, so you're liking to make some bad decisions and you get like our free pass as you've got nothing to lose. I found on Grief my Grief Island. I decided I didn't I could have just show up for the bare minimum of my life and I was allowed to cancel anything. And I only did what I wanted to do for a month, and I and you extended that. I just extend. I did extend it. So then I was like, I'm not ready to go back to the mainland because I actually had a good time on Grief Island. So then I was like, I'm gonna be just tubing from like I just living life, So he's gonna be like me and a quarky dog with like a beer sphere and a tube, but just fucking tubing. Because actually the lessons from Greef Island, all this ship that I eliminated, I actually didn't put a lot of it back in. I was like, stuff, I don't need to do interesting. I don't need to do that. People I don't want to see. If I don't want to see you, I'm not seeing you. Know, you only have so much energy that's our the biggest commodity right energy teams. And you know, it's a new perspective. I've got some people off this year as well. Aaron and I ship, He's get a text from Kyle you. I said I had I had a friend, like twice a year, she'd be really mad at me for no one. I don't like to have a friend. I have a friend, and she gets over right whatever, and then last time she got man, I was like, I'm not gonna make up with this person over again. I'm so sorry. I get mad at your rationally the podcast and then I talk, I've only known you since something insane. Oh my god, that lady who did our review. And then she wasn't mad that we I think she reviewed our Kyle podcast and she was man that you were talking about we knew Kyle for too long. She could eat a bag of which she was mad. We knew each other things besides the Bachelor that we discussed about. How yeah, anyway, whatever, Okay, So then okay, so then so then we go first America leaving you a hot dog, and you get a hot dog, and you get a hot dog and I'm like, yeah, So then date number two Luren. I thought Laura was going to be gone because whenever somebody wheels the suitcase, I think they're out. So Lauren Bee gets picked after their riveting date in Paris, which made me when it as a person who's uncomfortable with awkward silence. I don't mind silence, but like silence where there's no one knows what to talk about, why would you go back for more? That was the worst. That's why I can't watch. She can't watch for your enthusiasm because awkward moments make me so uncomfortable. But I have to say, can we just go right? Well, first of all, when she was like, this place is very okay. So then then up she jumps on him. She's got a great body, let's just like she is Emily she had so then so then she's she's like, we're on an old wall. And then she's like the bike riding and then she goes, you lead the way, and then he jumps up on the bike. And then they walked to the city and she goes, this is very Italian and he goes, yeah, weird. Right. That's when I took a spoon and try to carve out my eyeball. And then He's like, why am I watching the goes pray go, I think that you're welcome or you have the whole podcast about it. God that God. So then they go have you asked him like, um, has she ever made you laugh? Like no, did you ever tell you something you didn't already know? And go no, she challenge you, Well, she doesn't really talk. Um, that's a challenge oratory challenge. So then he goes, Um, she goes, she's amazing. I'm like, what did I write? Big of dumb glass? That's because she was holding the world's largest champagne glass. And I was like, why did you so big? I'm glad she had a tumbler. I was like, oh yeah, aber glass toasted breaking down our walls. And he goes because I love that, and I love that you wrote that, because I was like, why the group date the worst? She had paid lesson that? Just like Kyle's cross and like just like Kyle's So then she goes, you know, I have to understand you, but I have to get to know you. You know. That's what he says, Um, how are you feeling? And then she's like, it's hard for me to put myself in a blade where I could feel hurting at and then she says and then she says, I feel like I'm starting to fall in love with you, and he goes, I'm gonna be right back to my pause and in my mind, but he wanted something from her so bad. Then he gets it and he's like, oh pass, he like runs into the woods like John val John, that's what it is, Okatie. What did you think when he was like right back, I'll be right back, John. I was just so confused. I was like, is he going to like pee like the time to pee? I would think, is he going to talk to a producer? That's what I thought. He was going to talk to a peruce and be like, can I say I love? It was so weird. It was so that I know is right? Um. I think he was freaked out and I think that got him up. And I think when he walked away, he convinced himself he was totally in love and then he was fine. So he was like not into it. First, I think he like too much. No, I disagree. It looked like I think he he something like how you guys Robert's rules of conduct? No, I know what you mean, but I think this guy has been looking at Lauren the entire time, wanting this, not getting it, not getting it. Finally she goes, I'm falling in love with you, and he just is like, I don't even I can't like he like burst into flames. Then I think he's got part of his brain that's like bachelor, you can't reveal. I don't know, and that stunted emotional not like happy, goes out jerks by the drowns, sings himself a little lame is he holds himself like real kind of close. It was cut out. It was cut out. His lame is that car he sings because that's of breath. Why sits back down and he's like yes, so then sit on my dick. And then she goes back with you don't want to make the person feel like she thinks she was shocked. She think he was shocked, and he has no emotional response to shock is to leave you know how vulnerable. If you just said I am falling in love with you and it was like he could have said said something to be like, don't take this from my second he didn't. He was just like no, because he goes, I'm gonna be right back so it comes back. She's crying. He goes, sorry about that. I was just nervous as hell. I feel vulnerable with you, Emily Maynard. I'm falling. So doesn't he know you're not supposed to do this, supposed to do I feel so deeply in love with you. It's great, and I grow Why why? Why? God, I'm falling in love with that girl? Why what do you want? Why? She was great in pants, She's got a great body. Is she's tiny, tiny bond that he can hold real close. Please remember these girls poop every day And it sounds like a yeah, but like these are everyone's animals, and you're gonna this is gonna fade. This flower. A crocodile is going to come up and buy her on the ahole and then he's going to have to wipe her because she'll be she'll be damaged, and then take care of her. She looked. I actually took her down to Cobo with a cradle lemons. She was she had. She's super precious. Yeah, she's she's so bored, but I think they're absolutely perfect together. I want I want to aber and tell her I love her, like, well you did, you just did. I'm excited to me, Lauren's family think could be my family. I mean, is she the winner? She's she's the winner, She's surprising us. I thought, Katie, is she the winner? Do you think Lauren B's the winner? Katie? Is he gonna surprise us again? Is gonna be the winner? Well? I guess Lauren B. Can I picked that other girl? I get them all confused, and Kendall's good editing. Who's the other one who's like Becky and Lauren? It's Tia and Lauren and we're going to get that southern boyfriend back whose busy eyes, blonde, busy eyes. What do you mean by Kendall? She's my pick for Do you think Lauren B looks exactly Yes, she's interesting. Yes, they win, They win exactly the same. She looks like Lauren that Ben Higgins show, like exactly Okay. So then I go to see Enne Sienne shows up. She said the leg wrap around up. She's like, I have to feel these emotions with her. What he says later on, he says, and I don't know exactly where, but he says, I'm trying to be logic. Twice in this episode, he says the frank I'm trying to be logic time. Why go with the right word when it's so easy to go okay? So then so Cianne rops her legs around up and it's so beautiful, the beautiful, beautiful black woman who went to Yale. They meet Julio. Julio the truffle hunter. This is our trouffle dog. Let's go hunting the trouple under. I did it. I dig it up. And then Sienna is like, but can I do? And he goes with Jenne can I dig deep enough? And then they make pasta and he goes, I love it. You use your hands. And then the family is like, so are you in love? Are you love? She's like, I don't talk about love, but maybe this morning. I just wrote a five page treatment called the truffle Hunter. And I would love to see Julio and the Vikings from when they went to remember. But made a really good point. Seen made a really sorry to ve. Just please take it. I just said she made a really good point because she's she went saw this family. Yes, there they truffle hunt. They all eat together, and she's like, this family lives right. And I did have a potential moment where I'm like, I don't get wrong, I wanted I almost wanted to go make it. I've never should try to make I look for truffles in my backyard. Never I find. I just eat up when I find in my backyard in Los Angeles. I don't have a yard. I live in ak I gotta tell you, guys, just trying to just dig up. I just whatever. I just shave it over something like Trader through your Trader Joe's pasta. Guys, I've never had truffle isn't good? What does it taste like? Trouble makes everything amazing, like peanut butter. It's it's a unique taste, but I think it's the most delicious taste on What does taste like of the greatest mushroom oil you've ever It's that pasta? Anything good shape of that pasta, like the yolk pozza. I'm going to find the best truffle oil in l A and we're going to go eat it. It's I love flavor flavors. I'd love to eat. I like the most quality people can't be successful on the show, because I think that girl is very quality. She was like, you know not she's acting like a normal person d him. It seems like she's not in love with me, Like what's her day? You know, she's not effusively being sane. Not a good match because she's wonderful. Um, Rebecca the first one from Minneapolis that he chose, not a good match because she's fantastic. Like these women aren't good for him, And he's like, I don't know if I have that connection, meaning I like, because they're smart and interesting. I don't want to seeze or boobies as much. He needs someone to go. It's Italy, so Italian perfect, Yeah, the bell So then they're like j J Kiss kiss maybe something like that, and then he's like, um so then he just kind of was like it was like in front of the whole film and he was like she's like oh and he's like no, uh and win more for good luck. I've gotta cut. I didn't like that, and I know it was supposed to be from The Globowski, but it was like, really, it was really gross. I didn't like it. I wanted him to like drip truffle all over his space and then start licking his own face. So then she says love. I saw it as a weakness but today I saw his strength the way they view love and talk about love. And then he goes, I love that. I can't. I can't I love that is a weakness and then she and then she says family is so important, and then the bill starts tolding for whom the bill told. She's like, you're making me nervous, and she's like, and want this to be the end of our relationships? Is like God. And then Ernest Hemingways comes out from underneath the table. Do you think they added that? Yes? So then so then so then she's she's out. So then Tia says something needs to be said tomorrow about Becca m and her seriousness at this, and I'm like, wait, what why, Wait, Tia, don't that. Don't don't be a tattle tale. You don't be the one that tattles to the baths. I never thought i'd see that at a love Ta t You're cooler than that, You're from Wiener. At least she's owned up to it, though she went right to back. It was like I told that, which which I thought was a good qual Like why are you talking? Why is her name in your mouth? What's her name in the mouth? Then? What am I tasting your name in my mouth. Then the villa. They go to the villa, and I kept rewinding it, and I don't know what he was like, this is the villa that was owned by a something, and then he goes this villa. It's crazy cool, he said, the villa Napoleon's sister. Napoleon's sister's villa is that I couldn't understand Napoleon's sister when design it. She said, I wanted to be crazy, and that's why I said that. John L. John, Oh my god. I was rewinding a bunch of times the next week on when I'm blonde hair, busy eyes, sister look identical, yes, and sounds identical. She said something that like I run it like five times, like I couldn't get it. I should have recorded I Love, I loved to his mom and the upcoming sent us, Oh my god, Yeah, it's so good. Here we go here, Okay, wait, just give it one second, guys, let's see what's happening. Here we go, let's move this for it all. Oh so good. What's happening? Sorry, guys, let's do the scene. You're coming up to the cast. Okay, here I go and I'm like, oh, this is crazy cool. This is what do you think? It's crazy cool? I'm on a Jenny fuck all the girls in the garden tonight. Do you love me? I kiss your face? I like a balling ball, a race cars. I am rich. You cannot face smart or two amberha logic, logic, logic, it's so good. Okay, hellf of bread for my love up. My apologies to my mother for just hearing me say the first day. Ok sorry mom. Okay. So then so then we go out and it's a triple date and Kendall is she's the first. He just grabs Kendall immediately and they are like because she's dirt as she's g t ap, she is like grinding him, and she goes, I'm extremely close to my family. And he goes, I love that. Oh my god, We've got to do that the next live show. I love That's got to be the drinking. Yeah, you know, some people were saying that they kept drinking and that they just switched to wine because they were getting too hammered. That, yeah, they do it. I love that. And so then and then he goes, I don't She goes, I don't plan on being in a long distance relationship. I want to be around you until I feel you, and he was like yeah, and then she's like, I want to bring you to my house and my family and friends. And then so then next up is Tia and she's ratting out beccat M and how I feel about you, and I feel about that my constant feelings for you, and he goes, I love that we are And let me ask you this, what do you think happened? Do you feel like I thought Tia was like on fired this whole season, but then in the last couple episodes, it just feels like Tea is now out of it, I mean, to get back. I don't know, because sometimes the editing makes this think, oh, they're out, and then it's like the we are because they're really doing a good job and are shocked each time. Yeah, yeah, I mean, but the fact that he kept blonde hair, busy eyes gave her the rose right away that I like her more than you. But I also think that the producers how they needed. The producers knew that maybe he'd agreed to let Becca go because he looked like statutory rain, so that maybe they were like, it's more, everyone knows you would pick her over Kendall or whatever, like it's more interesting if t has rat it out it out back and now it's more like a two two on one. Let's make it more. They would tell her like, hey, we made him pick her first because we like the tension, probably like to make her feel better or something. I don't know. Yeah, I just was really thought it was awful. I guess I just wanted it's gonna I don't know. You think the producers were like, you gotta get rid of back m Yeah, she's five. Some people that I some people think she's actually like eighteen or nineteen. But I feel like it would have come out. I feel like it would have come out if her if her being a missing person's report came out, if she graduated in high school in like, I feel like it would come out. Yeah, But in the Mulan rouge, I think you spoke about this like she she looks older right with all her makeup on, and she You're just like, okay, it's gonna happen. But she looked so young in this, so then okay. So then Tia comes back and she was like, I told her, you're not ready as an older sister, as an older sister. I just don't fail. You're ready, and then she used her leslie Konnacht acting training. She had at her best non waterproof mess Gara and there was a moment where she said the phrase she goes, I think of saying that I hurt and this understood. She's a really cute crier. I will say. She was a I'm not seeing for who I am and she was like a really successful mess scaratte Chunk and then she goes, I mean I she did the best no one thought, so she's just crying. And then she had a moment of we realized she is completely lying. She goes, I think I really am starting to fall for him, and I really have a lot of hope for our relationship. I was like, I just want on a liar liar. She was touching her face, which this is for life when people are lying, a lot of times they touched their face. It was a physiological reason for it that you literally get a little itch in the face because I blood leaves because you're lying. I'm a pilot. I'm a pilot. Yes, sexual feelings for I'm a pilot. I'm a pilot. I didn't just eat the garbage from my touching your face and she was talking like this. She was like, that's interesting, Kyle. How do you know that poker to watch people are lying to me? Are you good poker player? Sometimes sometimes I have one. Look, I don't want to brag. When Harris poker tournament forgot a poker tournament. You play tournaments ballots, tournament ballots, that's right, And did you win? Not that made four thousand dollars. It's a lot. I was bargata and I did a poker tournament city right, and I won. I had and then I started playing crazy high limit stuff and I ended up with I had seven thousand. I was in cash, but I didn't want to put it all my suitcase. I had like strapped your body, like five thousand dollars in cash. And then I missed my plane. I slept in the airport like big I was with the Oh my god, I just didn't. I just have been so I'm just a potty mouth today. I just I tried to have seven thousand dollars strip to his taint, like passed out of the lip dropping some tea balls. So sorry, I don't know what I've been acting out. I've been doing a lot of online shopping. I'm acting out. I'm acting out. I bought a bunch of a heels on Eldo and I returned them. All I was like, these are tragedy. Why did I buy? I bought red stiletto pointy sock boots and I was like, I look like I'm in the future and I'm like ready to go on the back, Like they're going back, They're going back to Box Brothers. Yeah, but I ordered a bunch. I got to make up pallets I got. I got a new bras on its way. It's not good. It's all late at night in the Atlanta hotel. So I'm like, I'm a lone land. I don't know about on sound. I'm like, I'm gonna buy that. And then I like I got like not normally, but I put out a little bit of a chair retail therapy, that's you know what. I tried on a pair of boots for the show like and then I was like, these are cute and they're like girl, they're Justica Simpson from DSW And I was like, what so if something is kind of affordable, and I was like, I need to order them so that I and then that just started all slippery. It's a slippery sli. I bought two pairs of Jessica Simpson ds, but those aren't going back. Those are staying. Man. I was just debating last night if I should wear my Wisconsin ice hockey jersey during the USA Finland game. You should? You g you should? You should? You should beccacause popped in my head. I don't know if it's very strange. Maybe you guys real late. Imagine to me, she looks like this is very strange. But like in the depression, you those very poor boys with the hat selling like extra extrass. Yeah, yeah, news, Well you just described now why he thought she was so attractive. Because he's been in a prison in France a little earlier. Depression really gets his boot. Oh I love economic depression. I can't find bread. So then okay, so then Kendall, Kendall, He goes, there's one person I'm really confident in the first one who gives it to his Kendall, I'm really excited to meet your family. What meanwhile, Beca is being I think he likes me fingers crossed. I hope so, I hope so, and then would be great we skipped over and she's just like jump broke back, Oh my god, and she went she wept to him and she's like crying and he's like breathe just relaxed, and she's like and she's like, I went here and you out. And then she's like news that I was serious about here. I didn't want to be seen for my heart and then cut she's eating girl scal so, oh my god, Sider the best, there was, the best, there is the best news story. Last week, there are these girls Scouts that opened up a cookie stand outside of a pot dispensary in Oakland and like seven thou dollars of the and like like the other troops were mad. It's like it's so desparious. And apparently in San Diego there was a troop that did it outside of a pot dispensary and but they're like getting upset about it. Okay, the girls, it's so smart. So then Tia so then so then it's two on one and we've got Tia and we got Becca and Tias like I am I'm here to be open and honest, interact and to find and love the end and he goes, I love that And then she goes, I just watching it out to be directed to it, right. I do feel like I'm falling in love with you, and I want you to protect my heart, to take care of it. And then and then he goes, and then he goes, I'm trying to be logic, and he goes, I love that. I just picture your family. It's all crowded. And then and then Becca comes up and and then she's like, I don't know what Becca could say to get it. And then Beca's all curled up like a like a lap cat and it's sexy, slinky dress. And then she goes, I do feel like you see me, and she's like, have a little faith in my twenty Tin emailed self after the Grays, I'm getting gray hair. And he's like, oh you're an old lady. Oh oh yeah, that was their right before very teeth. I'm gonna stick my tongue so far down into your denture you. So then so then she goes, I do feel like I'm falling in love with you, and it's scary, and I wish you had a little more faith in us. And then I noticed he had a man manicure. I wrote down and she was like shiny fingernails as he was making out with her, and then he said, beck home, and I wrote what And then she goes, are is coming in Arkansas? And then um, I don't know gonna eat so sorry, it's okay. Oh. Then she's weeping in the Scion. Becca got stuck into that like like like cube bake Van and then she's like, it's hard for me to accept that this is over. And then my mom watched her and Kimmel and apparently she said she went on because she wanted to meet Peter. I circle. That's pretty good right there. And then Ari's crying, you know that he made her like the producers made him get rid of her, and he goes, she made this fun and she captured my heart. This just sucks. And then we see coming up, We see Taxidermy, We see TIA's mom, which is amazing, and then we see previews for tonight's Winter Games with the meat Ball making out with some dude that the Canadian bats Ben Higgins. She's going to get her heartbroken again. And then Bibian is the Meatball, sweet little Italian. Oh my god, this is so good. So Dad's look so angry. Oh my god. The Dad's definitely gonna you're right, Tea is going to be in the final two and that dude's gonna show up my girl. Yeah, and he's gonna be like what and then he's going to be like oh, thank god because he wants Lauren all along. Yeah. What do you think? The dad was scary because I'll find you fat good trying to find me, but like every very easy to find. I'm the white guy. I'm the white guy. Dude, dude, what do you think this has gotten to be a good season? I thought it was so boring, very angry, which means it's good to the last episode was good. Shocked when Chelsea got cut. I've been shocked by the because I felt like, with like Jojo, it was so clear she was going to pick Jordan's and even with like ding Dong Nick, it was so clear he was going to pick Vanessa. Like I feel like this is like wait, what this is some twist and turn? I did? I do like his? The four ladies that are left, I think not. But the thing is it's like I always say, not Lauren B. But it's just it's it's not Lauren B for me, you know what I mean? So I, Lauren b and Ari are a good match of like if you know of like two people that are taking naps while they're talking and walking around and looking at Italian things in Italy, they're kind of perfect. You said that, would you die if I called my mom for twenty seconds? I'll tell we only have twenty seconds just to hear her my fav Okay, let's just see she's she's so I'm gonna warner get ready. She's the best. She she's for all your little company, she's a little contro from little comter real estate, for all your summer rental nieds, but by a house. Don't rent, don't rent from her, don't be an idiot. Maybe she's playing Mittens. Mittens is on fire. Janet is going to Morocco on Friday. My mom is a catney mitten again. And then she walks on a late Oh my god, let's try around. Um, yeah, she's going to Morocco and let me leave your mom a really weird message. Jane's kind. Do you accept loose room and let's try I'm looking for a one bedroom underneath the ground. Just call. I don't want any light, no light, no windows. Janna is your daughter art and you're on the podcast. Oh my gosh, okay, you're on with Aaron and Kyle and Katie. It's only we only have like one minute, but you're the only one that watched beccat m on Kimmel. Will you give us a little review of her? Because I didn't see it yet, you can see it on YouTube. Basically, she was of They asked her about the fact that she was missing and her mother reported her missing. Apparently she was up on the mountains with a friends sort of after the whole after she got kicked off. And so why did she why did she say she but why did she say pot farm? Why did she say she was going to a weed farm? Well, her mother misunderstood. According to her, was not at a weed farm. Okay, um, but but she is very friendly with the miss Taxi Jeremy and that he hangs out with and um yeah. And then when he said, well, why did you go on the Battery, she said, I've always loved the Bachelor Nations and I always thought it would be fun to be on, and then she did it. I was hoping it would be Peter Burn. Did you just liking her? On Kimmel, I liked. I've always liked her. I liked her just as much. She's you know, they kept referring to us with nanny. She's no. Nanny's about she wanted to be on TV. Um he did your Oscar predictions? Who do you think it's gonna win? Best Actor? Mum? Um? Who's gold be the girl? The peach fucker? What are we talking about? Can't you tell me that you thought you thought that peach fucker was gonna win from the Oscars? Didn't you say Oscars? Oscars? Oh? Definitely, Yeah, the peach guy, I mean he, I mean who else could do it like that? She goes, She goes, I think the kid from Call Me by Your Name is gonna win because the peach bucker. It was her review. You think Jordan's gonna we screenplay and peachers know everybody enjoy the best crazy screenplay? I think is going to be Jordan's. Yeah, and then and then peach fucker went the Best Actor, Yes, and then best Actress. I don't know, that's sort of up the grap I think Frances McDorman. Maybe where are the girl from Lady Byrd? Yeah? Alright, MoMA the girl from Scrape of Water they're coming up kind of store handed up that. There you go, he might win director. All right, mama, bear overall, were you shocked last night watching The Bachelor? I was shocked. I was happily shocked. Well, Jimmy Kimmel made fun of the fact that when Becca cried, her tear came out black because it was hers, and he thought maybe it was the devil in her coming out very cute, it was there. She's very cute, but she's too young for him the beginning beginning definitely. Do you still like Ari? I like, all right, I think, well, here's what's interesting to me. I think he's still attracted to the blonde girl who has no personality whatsoever. Thank you for each other. I said, They're terrifect to each other. It's like two pairs of He's floating in the wind. It's going to come down to the blonde girl and the good Christian girl from I think she's from Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think it's coming down to those two, and I think she's gonna go with the blonde. There you go, all, mama, I'll call you later. Okay, okay, I guess you should cut out that she's going to be in Moroccos. Nobody robs her. No one's gonna rob her. There's nothing there, there's nothing to nobody incast, don't nobody in Rue Island. Please don't rob my mom. Don't rub my mom. Just just leave my mom. She didn't. Yeah, don't rob my mom. I thought our listeners in Morocco. I did too, Robert and nobody robed Janet. You know, if she's so sad, but now that I put it out, she's so awesome. She's, well, you're awesome, so you obviously, No, she's hilarious. She's you know, we're tight. We're want your mom to meet my mom. They would have Does she play bridge? She likes cards. I don't know if she can know what's how to play, but yeah she would. I want my women have friends. Oh my god, my mom is a blasts and they should be friends. I was like young, but like all her friends are dying. Yeah, what is your She's like young and healthy. And then she's in Westport, Connecticut. I did a play there at the west Park Country Playhouse. Shut up. My mother used to work there. It's really cute. It's a good it's a good like it's like Broadway. Almost. I have a legit theater career. I have a weird side legit theater career. You're a good singer? Or is it like, was it acting? It's all acting? Did you go to Juilliard? I did not say you got that vibe? Thank you? It's it like last is it paren Shacks? It's it's podcast, Barbie. All right, we're going to before we Before we go, I'm gonna do a tweet of the week, and uh, guys, what fun? Thank Kyle, thank you so much. Are you gonna be watching Batchelory Runner games? I can't get that in. I got a bit of my t vo. I gotta go home and put my Beta Max in. My dad invested hard in Beta Max when it first came out. He bought. He went really hard on Beta Max. Alright, like us on iTunes and Facebook that we have here. Here's a review five stars from Jesse Sims. I have to say I love this podcast with long time Batch fan. I can't read longtime Batch fan. Arden loved one shameless thanks um, and when a co worker suggested this podcast, I immediately become obsessed with this season. The podcast is better than the show. Although it's gotten good. I listened while I work and die laughing. Looking forward to all the upcoming episodes with the hinted ending of the season as well as the Winter Game into Paradise. Keep up with the great work. Thank you for tweeting in. And here's another one. This one is there are five stars from Ways and Means Sandals Resorts Incorporated. I wish this podcast was seventy five hours long. Well, we sure appreciate it, and I will just read one email. Here we go, uh, Madeline Sykes are tattoo, Aren't and friends? First off of the podcast Girlfriend's Night. Listen every week and enjoy it more than the show itself. Mike, okay, um okay the subject of our tattoo? Um okay, uh okay. Anyway, there we go. There we go, all sorts of things that you get the gist. We're gonna do tweet of the weeks that I didn't do her justice. Oh my god. Okay, so I'm gonna just do randomly. Here's five tweets you guys. We're gonna narrow downe to two. This is from s Valentine at dead pan Dolores quote. I just end up in Scottsdale wondering how I got here, literally how everyone in Scottsdale every day? That's where are in fooling? Specifically for me? This is from Lazy Joe at Lacey and Scored. Joe already sends Becca home in a minivan after he buckles her into her Booster Sea. Yes yes, um, Jackie at Sweet six girl, oh five three one. Let's not be dramatic. Grandpa already just walking. Let's not be dramatic. Grandpa already just walked away to let out of far god too much gluten. Um. Ryan Patrick Green at r RP Green Machine for said Lauren be in Their date was so boring. They literally had to pay Italian children to throw a ball at her and make her get up and be active and play like an old cat. That was amazing, all right, and that's exactly what they did. Um. And then the last one Cassandra Strode at Nails and Knits. I'm drinking a light beer tonight so I don't get a ship face paying the I like that drinking game. I'm gonna narrow that down to although here's the one more. Jessica at I Am Semisweet? Does Ari lose his trust fund if he leaves Scottsdale. What the fuck? I'm gonna narrow it down to do you wish scotts Stale one? Do you like better that one? Or the first Scottsdale one? The first saw Stale one? Is I just end up in Scottsdale wondering how I got here? Literally, how everyone in Scottsdale feels every day? Or do you like the minivan? Okay, so we're gonna go. We're gonna narrow down to the final two. Are Steve Valentine a dead Pandelora's I just end up in Scottsdale wondering how I got here? Literally, how everyone is Scottsdale feels every day? And although I do, I'm gonna do two more. Let's not be dramatic. Grandpa already just walked away to let out of fart? Okay, seven, narrow down to fart. Okay, so it's either fart or Ryan Patrick Green Lauren b In. Their date was so boring they literally had to pay a towleeen children to throw a ball at her and make her get up and be active and play like an old cat. Fart ear old cat, I mean old cat. It's got Katie, Okay, So Ryan Patrick green a r P Green Machine for Thank you so much, guys. Awesome, awesome tweets, really good ones though like yeah, maybe he did have some gas. They're just getting Yeah, it'd be like and her being like did I say something wrong? Oh boy? Oh Kyle, are you a free the weekend of April twenties, should we see if we can get you a moon tower? You know what I'll do the next one. You guys have your moon tower, but I like, I would like to go on the road with you. Guys, can stand up and do a pod come do it? We have so much fun. It's so much fun. Are you sure? Because moontower is really fun. Moontower is really it's so fun. It's like it's like and then I'm going to raise you fun and we go dancing you guys? Maybe I mean well, in conclusion, what this has been a joy? Thank you so much? Um, Katie Levine? Any final thoughts? Alright, guys, that's why we pay um guys, what did joy? Will you please come back and I love it here okay and be watching what Bachelor Winter Games? We also need to have Jasmine and Alexei had so much fun with those girls. We got to hang out with them in San Francisco, the Dolphin Girl and Jasmine, who is choke chokey. They're like San Francisco. We love them, but they live here. We should have to come in. Maybe they could talk about batch Winter Games. Um, Aaron, see you tomorrow, Valentinized, Will you guys be my Valentine? Yes? Wow, we really did it. We really did it. We're back in the fold. Oh I'm just trying to hit play and it's not happening. This podcast is so podcasting. My glasses starts of my glasses and your boasts because of my dat hair. Lauren, Oh my god. I like that. I love that, guys. I love that so close to like being a road I love that. I love that. I love that so cratch it's amazing. I love that. I love that it's amazing, amazing. I love that. I love that. I can't wait to take cater to Mexico with a cradle love. I love that beautiful. I love that. HASHTA tell you it's so. It's a hashtag not Peter now leading Noticed dot com