Finger Valve Yourself

Published Aug 12, 2024, 6:00 PM

In today's podcast:

  • No-one in Australia can nail a quiz
  • Will decides what's porn
  • How many crushes the boys have
  • Lads Lingo
  • Hiding your poops
  • OnlyFans star Renee Gracie
  • Woody's Gold Medal Tattoo

The Will and Woody Podcast.

Hey guys, welcome to the Will and Woody Podcast. It's once a week deal now if you're fresh to it, where we're recapping the best bits of the week and then you guys get to get all the inside behind the scenes chat given that we're talking about the stuff retrospectively, if you want to get into the science of it.

I'm about science.

That's science, mate, That's that's that's pure science. We're going to be talking about a girl used her finger to keep her fart silent.

Now that's science.

Try and tell me that's not science. That we're going to be talking about. What is porn and what's not porn. That's science as far as I'm concerned, and that's going to be ratified by a scientist and Australia's best and largest only fans.

Grosser, I'm going to say grosser.

I mean no, I mean grosser because.

She grosses, she grows, gets a gross feet.

I made like eighty thousand US dollars within the first couple of hours hours.

Yeah, that's that's that's good gross that's good grossing, that's hot grossing.

And she's grossing for grossing In some instances. I'm not saying we grosie.

Oh cool.

Well she's gonna join a bit later on amazing chat with her. If you don't know anything about her as well, sorry, just before, just before we go into that, is there anyone else that you think that grosses for gross better than a porn star or an only fans stuff.

I don't quite understand the question.

Well, like doing something gross to get gross cash.

No, there's people.

Who combers gross for gross, no doubt.

There's people who also eat like amounts of dog competition. They're called feeders. They gross for gross.

No feeders.

Something else, dude? Is it? Have you looked up like videos online? Like people get paid a lot of money. So I'm just gonna eat fourteen kilos of ham and they sit there for hours eating ham and they get paid a lot of money. There was a woman who died recently because she ate too many ramen noodles. Yes, so she would have been grossing gross? How many noodles? Heaps?

Oh?

Got of it?

Doesn't it? If you were like about ten?

Well, if it killed her, it must be a lot of Rahmen, if it killed her, it's got to be I mean, how many? How many ramen. Do you think would be life life threatening?

Hey, quizzes have been really funny this week.

Didn't answer my raman.

Been some amazing quiz moments this week on the podcast. Woulds a blunders from listeners. Obviously we've got astray as easy as quiz kicks off the show every day at five o'clock for the five o'clock hour, and some amazing misses from some of our lovely listeners. Six times seven, oh say six?

Please someone who knows?

Forty three?

Seven times six.

Forty three.

The name of vegetable? Study with bee banana? Oh?

B tree?

Oh?

What's the capital of India at?

Sorry?

No ah?

Now a faux paa on an India trivia question takes me.

Backwards, It really does, so I think I mean still a bigger faux pa, only because the other faux pa around the geography of India that happened on this show went viral in India. If you haven't heard this, just sit back and enjoy yourself, because before I play this audio, we were doing like a fake who wants to be a millionaire thing in the studio. Yeah, it was just we're having a been a fun with it, I said, can I phone a friend you did, and I called Dad. Now you'll hear in this audio when I called Dad, I think he has this moment where he's like shit.

I didn't know, but I think what he is actually on.

Who wants to be a millionaire? And you can hear how seriously he takes the question.

Enjoy his panic? Is the Great Wall of China?

Great Walls China?

Options are China?

Yeah, South Korea? Yeah right, India or Japan?

Yeah right?

Do you want to use a lifeline or anything?

Can I call Dad?

Absolutely again?

Are you ready? Yeah?

Okay, here we go go.

Okay that I've got to be really quick here ione who wants to be a millionaire? Dad? Yep? Okay? So where is the Great Wall of China? Is it a China, B, South Korea, C India or d Japan?

Well not South Korea, not Japan.

Could be bordering on India.

Could be a trick question.

Okay, good Dad, this is good.

India or China the obvious hands of China.

Yeah, probably bordered on India.

I was going to cheek, but the phone the white more boys take this seriously?

Do you think at know you're.

The last thing that said was China is the obvious answer, but he thinks it borders on India. Yes, and given the controversy that this question has stirred, Eddie, Yep, I'm gonna lock in India. Final answer, yea, yeah, yea, I'm gonna lock it India.

Okay. So with the question of where is the Great Wall of China?

That's it India?

What?

Well, Dad was? Dad? Let me there. You don't think it will be so.

Obvious because nobody could believe.

That it's brought down two generations of white walls. I love.

I love that.

Confidently Dad knocked out. Well, it's not Southre it's so yeah that it's been seen by millions, like millions of people.

In tens of millions.

It was.

It was a global sensation.

Yeah, best video I've ever done.

I think he got stopped in the street in India.

He does. Yeah, he can't go there anymore him. I can't c a blanket.

Over all of them anyway. It wasn't just the quiz players who are having a little bit of an offweek here on willer Wood. It was also the quiz writers. So we were doing this thing for door Dash, one of thousand dollars if you could beat us in the quiz topic of your choosing. So these people are coming on saying I'm an expert in this topic. So we started writing something. Well, let's just call us BAT. It's Bat LJ our producer LJ. The Jordi from northern England. She was writing the quizzes and they became increasingly confusing.

I won't just need to check is there a typo?

Yeah?

Yeah, there is a typo wherez you can't have typeos?

Now, second last question, maybe don't say anything. Yep, that doesn't make any sense. So not only was it hard to understand LJ.

I didn't realize until this moment that she writes the way she talks phonetically, yeah, which is not the way accents work. And somehow she's got through her life thinking all right, words the way that I say them, it doesn't matter about the spelling. Yeah.

So it was very, very confusing. I mean, LJ will never write a quiz again in her life. Let's you know that job. We'll go back to Italy's obviously. But while she had the conch at this stage writing quizzes, another girl called up. When I say girl, she was twenty years old. She said that her pet subject or her experts topic was anatomy. Right, so she's twenty she obviously did biology. In year twelve, LJ wrote the quiz or just copy and pasted the quiz from the seventh year medical examination. When you're applying to specialize, Hi, Alex, what would you like to take us on.

In another of the human body?

How many organs are there in the human body?

Oh my god, I've got no idea. How many of the seventy eight organs in the body start with the letter A? This is really hard, sorry, mate, tell me what section of the spine is missing here? Yes, cervical, thoracic, lumbar, sacrum, and Jesus Christ, could I vertebrate? So so neither you nor the person whose expertise was anatomy could answer any of those questions. And to prove just how hard that quiz was, we said to LJ, get us a doctor, like, organize a doctor to come on the show, And we don't think even a doctor would be able to answer these questions. So here is doctor Georgina Baker having a crack. How many organs are there in the human body? Doctor? Quite you, you're gonna have to be a little bit more specific.

Than that, talking by the organs brand couple.

Everything do everything right? All organs chust take out seventy eight By the way, who knows that up? So it's a bit of a continuation from the first. How many of the seventy eight organs in our body start with the letter A?

Oh?

Now that's just getting chilly, isn't it?

Can I say, Georgie, I know your specialty. You should know one of.

Them starts it amous.

Yeahs an organ that's a.

Place of marsal.

But okay, what section of the spine is missing here? Cervical, thoracic, lumber, sacrum and uh.

It's you pelvic.

I'm the oh god, that long that goes up to your skull, and then is it down bottom that goes into towers?

Yeah, I give that.

I just don't think we give it to you gent business don't know?

And then you have it seems like a relatively unfair competition, which is wild given that you know this is behind the scenes. The terms and conditions for those competitions are often quite stringent, and for a client as big as door Dash, you'd think we would have figured that out.

It's also weird that we're identifying that now publicly.

I said at the start, this is scientific woods and you know it's transparent, which's got a bear all. So that's what we're gonna do. Speaking of bearing all, you spoke to me about a guy in the games, and listeners of this show will know that we can't call them what they're actually called, starting with the O word, because of licensing reasons. But you spoke to me about a guy in the games who's about to get paid to bear it all.

Nice, Let's go to ads. I'll tell you about it up next. Now I'm not going to adds words. I love the ads. Sorry, guys, I've gone I do that. It happens on the live radio show as well. I will. It's been mid chat and I'll just go buddy, Hell, you guys are becausly want to hear some ads. Just go to him. I don't care they're not here, Just go to him. Spawny ads, spat ad no, okay, no ad, yeah, pole vaulter. Now his name escapes me, but come to me. Amaradiadi, Yes, Italian guy, Amaradi. He's doing the pole vault. I'm sure you guys have seen it. If you haven't seen it, Like, go and look it up, because it truly is hilarious. Amaradi's doing the pole vault and he hits his doodle on the pole and that's what that's what brings him down, Like he cleared the pole but didn't clear his dick. So anyway, I was telling you on the show that he'd received an extraordinary offer. Because of that, I'd love to offer you up to four hundred thousand dollars Australian in exchange for a sixty minute webcam show in which you show off your goods minus the crossbar of course.

Oh my god, so is an Australian that wants to give him that money?

No, it's two hundred thousand.

Is he going to take the money? Has responded, And what is showing off mean? Is he just doing a tally whacker?

I do it.

No, he's not doing a nude PolVol that's not porn. He's doing he's going to be doing that. He's doing the.

World. So I never realized this will but apparently you are the authority on what is and isn't porn.

That's not porn, Yeah, I mean that's all moonlight as a porn aficionado or PO, as we call ourselves.

Okay, well, let's test your pus by playing a little game that I like to call. Is it Pornonado? I think so.

Anisionado? It could be, It could be, it could be. You might need to look that up.

And that's a good thing to bring up. Fish.

It's an, it's a it's a PA.

So there you go.

I am a p A, which also sounds like personal assistant.

Nice or brought yourself right down, Prince Albert.

Or a Prince Albert. Yeah, I'm not a PO.

Yeah, no, you could be just a porn official.

Want to get the PO acronym? Yeah?

Yeah, I like PA. You know, I like PA because you know it's confusing. It's like, oh, you know, is he Is he a personal assistant? Or is he a porn efficient? Of course, like nobody's watching that for like that's I don't think that humans doing anything that is physically exerting athletically is appealing to look at in a sexual way.

Okay, well let's play is it poor? I think we all agree with that.

I can't think of anything worse.

Okay, you've had it went there, But apparently you are.

Something that flies everywhere in the wrong ways, and.

It's just going to it. Let's not go into it, all right, it's sick, but this is a very it's a great game. I've decided here. There are so many ways to go here as to how to test your ability to tell if something is porn or isn't porn. And the way that I've actually done it is I'm just naming you films. Ye is it? His names of films?

Yeah?

Okay, you tell me if it's an actual adult film or if maybe I've been a bit cheeky and just put it together myself.

Sure, I'm ready for the I'm the porn Police.

Baby, here we go.

Number one.

I've got five, okay, and I'm getting through all five because I love them. Okay. Number one, Saturday Night Beaver?

Is it?

Or is it?

Saturday Night Beaver?

Just a good name.

That's a really good name.

Is it or isn't it?

Disco themed porn?

Stop saying the P word?

Sorry, I reckon, that's porn Saturday Night Beaver? Good?

Wow, Yes, pp the porn Police has started.

Police.

We struck well done. One. Number number two screws that one? Number two? Yeah, Buffy the Vampire Layer.

That's not porn. That's not porn.

I'm going to call that that is that's a real film. The steak does not go through the heart though, my friend that it's all about.

Okay, next one here, shocking here, that's a shocking game as a shocking name for it, that's shocking.

I think no time for that. Next one? How to lose a guy in ten Gays? Is it or isn't it? Is it real? I can't. I want it to be.

So I'm going to say that's porn. Yes, yes, these have all been porn.

So they've all been born so far I have okay.

Next one, Robin Hood, that's porn.

Too much confidence. You've seen that is that is well done? Clearly seen that final one here you've shown your guards there a bit of a fan of made Marian. Are we okay? Here we go? Final one here. You might want to make it look a little bit more difficult if you can will And this is my favorite Edward penis hands. I will say that if this is, if this is a real movie, there is actually a scene where Edward tries.

To eat spaghetti. It's a scientific hot podcast. But now we come to that moment that you've been dying for since the show started.

Yes, as bloody lutely ads. Enjoy them. Enjoy them everyone.

On the other side, we're gonna be talking to an expert about how often people have crushes that are in relationships.

See on the other side, crush crush crushes.

Oh hello everyone, welcome back to the Will and Woody Podcast. What you got there was just a little bit of our yet to be released single. Yes, if you think it sounds like the melody from the very famous song Jackie, slightly different, It is slightly different, slightly different, just for licensing reasons now, Woods. One of the chats we had on the show this week is a question that I think is very interesting, which is how often, as an adult, particularly in a relationship, do you have a crush? So it's obviously something that we don't talk about very often because, yeah, don't want to make your partner feel bad about it, it might be embarrassing. Whatever that is. We had a chat about it. You copped out big time, and then I brought junior producer Analsi in Who's Desperately Single for a little bit of flavor.

Have a listen. I can relate to this more through a television show or like a celebrity or something that I would define as like more out of my realm or out of my world. So, for example, I am currently experiencing a little bit of a crush on Shakri Richardson, who is the sprinter sprinter who just won a silver medal, Right, and I want so I watched the documentary Sprint, and I had to I had to say to mem I was like, this is really weird. I think I have this crush on Shakiri Shakira. Yeah.

Interesting, So no real world crushes for you.

I died that.

I don't say answer.

All right, now we've got I asked you question.

Hang on, can I probably have one or two a month?

Okay, yeah, there you go, Analise, you want to step up, you want to step up to the plate, or you want to stick with the SHAKERI fairy answer now, Analise.

Abe obviously two men in relationships here, so we've both been conservative with our answers. He hasn't even give me an answer.

Where do you do a name?

Yes, I mean sure, sure, I'm sure. I had a crush on Nier in the House of Dragon. I watched it. We all have TV crushes. I'm talking day to day. Is there people that you're like? And I think this is the thing that people experience, and that's why thing. It's a good thing to talk about because we don't talk about it. We're not honest about that with each other. But we all have moments where we bump into people and we go, wow, yeah, you know, if I wasn't in a relationship, that would have been a cool thing. Anyway, analyse, I.

Reckon my crushes. It varies on a month to month basis. I would say on average maybe two, but like that's and that's a small number, but that's only because for me, a crush is someone I connect with so I find them attractive, but yes.

I also in some personality way.

But if we're just talking attractiveness, probably like a hundred, one hundred. Well, yeah, there's so many like and that's in the realm of like you know, see and football and soccer.

And it just starting Formula one B, a supercar, the badminton, volleyball.

So it goes from like only two crushes but one hundred people. If I'm physically a traded yeah, probably, but like one hundreds like a guest sim it could be one hundred and fifty. How many today? Today?

Maybe I've seen three?

Can you remember? Can you tell me that one of them? Yeah, one was Glen Powell. It just reignited my love to him.

I saw a tiptop headed from his new movie Twisters.

He's a good Okay, do you know that's a remake. I did know that was a remake. Who's in the first one? Definitely not Glenn I'll tell you that right now. Oh my god. Actually the original is also quite sexy. Oh yeah, Helen hunts amazing also, But who's Who's he.

The remake Twister? He's doing Twister? Helen Hunt was in Twister?

Yes, yeah, she was in the original.

Oh so they are just remaking Twister.

Just sexier.

It's Twisters.

The new one is twisted. But I mean it's about tornadoes.

Is the same thing, and they chase, they chase Tornado, chose Tornado.

It's the same bit. It's like going, oh, it's not Jaws, it's Jaw, but it's about a shark. It's like it's it's the same film.

And Bill Paxton is Helen Hunt's love interest. Paxton, I don't know if he's hot, but I like Paxton, I'd get in his pants, but I wouldn't call him harsh.

What about Paxton in Twister?

He's very six in a tornado, he chases, Oh you mean it's sexy. I mean, I'll tell you. I'll tell you. What was one of the great scenes of all time was when they tied themselves to those poles that went a long way underground in the final tornado. In the final scene of Twister, Yes, and when the tornado clears, they're making out in the grass. That that that was Champagne's in him, unbelove, that was Shampa and the whole there's leather straps around them, so that's a little bit rawncher.

Right. Does Glenn Powell strap himself to a pole in the new one?

I haven't seen it. I've just seen the really sexy fan edits of him, like walking with a wet white shirt was really nice.

A wet white I watched it over the weekend though, very good.

Now, Woods, yes, now that I think we've covered that up. Yes, after we spoke about the crushes with Analyse on air and you had that cop out.

Sorry, there's a lot of knives being thrown in my direction.

No knives, just scientific. That's just the fact. Well, the scientific knife that's currently in my back I would like to quickly remove.

I keep every time I go back to you, because all you've given us so far as I wanted to do a month. Then you move on very quickly. Yeah, I haven't moved on quickly. You you do. You're very clever, You're quick, and all of a sudden, that's gone. Who are your crushes? Give me specifics?

I think the point of this, hence why yours was a cop out is a cop out. It's a cop out. It's fine, you just Skerri Richardson, I gave you a name. Yeah, I know, but I sat here and said Bill Paxton, like it's a cop out.

I don't mind, Bilbo. I know that, I know that we've we've covered that.

But I think to name a person in the real world, there's a chance they might know that, and then that kind of ruins the whole thing.

Like, oh they might listen to this. Maybe Holy Molly, Well, I don't know.

In a circle what I think is completely innocent about the whole crush thing. Samantha Jay in the relationship Expert, She clarified this as soon as you start talking intention or naming them and stuff. You don't need to tell them that because I think if you're telling them that there's some intention there, which I think makes it not a crush anymore. I think that goes well, do you want to hook up with them or not? I don't think that's nice to sam or, more importantly, for the relationship that I currently enjoy with them, which telling them I have a crush on them would make it fucking weird.

Very good point, pol worker.

So we had Samantha on this relationship expert. I wanted to talk to her about this, and I wanted her to kind of effectively come into bat for my team and be like, this is totally cool, don't worry about it. But the weirdest thing happened, and she obviously wishes you know, we're speaking to Renee Gracie. A little bit later on Australia's Highest grossing only Fans. She clearly wished that you had an early fans would because all she did every time you said anything was just, oh my god, Woodie, I mean, you're just obviously such a great man, which ruined the whole chat.

Amazingly not exaggerating have listened to this. I feel like I would be hurting my partner if I was also going out there and intentionally boosting my ego by willingly flirting with people and hoping to get flirted too back.

That's really because you're a great man. You have a good intentions, you have good values, and that is so important to consider.

I was watching live theater and there was a naked female on stage. In my head, I was like, I'm I'm going to have to pretend like I'm not interested, trying to send the message to my partner, Hey, don't be threatened by that. I'm I'm not even looking at that.

Nice. You're such a protect her protecting her, which I think is just really divine. More men should be doing that.

So the woman we were meant to talk to about crushes had a crush on you. It was hard for all of us to do.

No one else think there's a world where maybe I was just making good points.

No one thought that I meant such a shame.

No one thought because overwhelmed with it, Like I was like, hang on, I might have been an interview with a relationship expert, and the whole team was like, well, she was clearly interviewed, I was like, hang on, guys, I might I might have made some good points.

Well. Speaking about making great points, wos I feel like you made a wonderful point earlier in the week as well, when it came to the lengths that people will go to to hide the fact that they're going to the toilet from their partner.

One.

When you are early in a relationship, how have you hidden the fact that you were doing a book?

Holidays is a tough time. Yes, early in a relationship and you're on a holiday and all of a sudden, you're in a hotel room and you're like, oh my god, this thing away from the bed I'm not using that. There's no way exactly Here's what I would do. Yeah, guys, feel free to steal it.

Yeah.

When I would check into a hotel and we're on holiday, I would after the check in, slip my credit card into my back pocket, not in my wallet. I then go to the room. When the feeling struck me that I need to do a number two, I would go I.

Think I've got a feeling that I left my credit card at the front desk, and I would then get my wallet out and go. I'd go through them all in front of her. I can't over the top. And then I had an excuse, you just believe you that your card was I had to I haven't finished down, Georgina.

This was your partner, so probably been seeing each other for six months, so we're just getting a special at this point. And I'd be like sleeping it till like sleeping it over it years and it would be like some random times in the morning he would just disappear. Probaly did it about a couple of times, and then I asked him on the third time. I was like, you just disappeared? Where did you go at three in the morning? Thinking it was really weird, and he told me he was like, oh, I just went to my shooting spot. And I was like, what do you mean? And I probably asked him a couple of months later. I was like, where was that shooting spot? He was like, Oh, it's just the server around the corner.

So brilliant. He's an hour though at three am he's an eight ale. He'd have a great relationship with the night worker, even no doubt Casey's called Casey, how do you go about hiding it?

So we've been dating for about a year and a half now, and of was only just recently been admitting that I do go to the bathroom, and I would always blame the facts that I need to go, say high and buy the mom and dad checking in at home. So I'd leave his house and I'd go.

How far away is his house? Case?

Oh like ten minute drive, not far at all.

Seems like a long way to go to take like a long way to go, but quite good. I don't on that. Imagine mom and dad. Okay, what are you toilet?

Again?

Very good? Let's go to Taylor. Now, Taylor, this is your boyfriend a message he would use to hide the fact that he was doing a number two.

Well, we've been together for three years and every morning he stays in my house.

He still goes to woolworst for a crap. Well, I don't even know toilet like a public toilet in the shopping center.

Still goes in So in the.

Mall there's a shopping Yeah, Sarah, you have toilets. That obviously been all too Sarah, Thanks you very much. Six five Sarah, what did you.

Do to hide the fact that you're doing it too?

Hi?

So it wasn't really a pooing story.

But whenever my boyfriend and I were first together and I needed to do a fart and I didn't want to tell him, I would just sneak into the bathroom and then just kind of put my finger like on my bum hole and it would just kind of like.

Out of like make.

Okay, So the last call you heard there?

The last cork, the last Corgie?

What happened in there?

What happened to there?

Where are you?

And popped my eard you're talking about last corgies? You're talking?

What did I say? Corgy? You did?

I thought? I said, You've also like been hitting a sniffstick very hard, so I put a hole in the I'm a little bit worried about you. The last corgie? Though there's a dock o there.

Well, I meant to say call is I meant to say call? We were heard there was a woman who puts her finger over her bottom.

Right, she finger valves her anus.

Unbelievable. She's a genius. I think we need to give her a call, right, you want to call?

You want to you want a cold call?

I need to know more details.

She's off Sarah Sarah, Sarah, Okay, I remember to call Sarah, and she I don't want to learn it the finger velves finger alve Yeah, because you're a because you thought you think it's a bit over the top. I have other methods of silencing.

Yes, Hi, let me a message and i'll call you back.

Was that wrong number?

No, I'm getting told that that's the right number. Hello, this is Will and Woody.

Why are you using a fake name? Well no, I think, Oh you're embarrassed about this. Okay, I'm putting two and two together. I be proud of this, Sarah. Yeah, yeah, I thought you'd be proud of this. This this talent, MM talent. It's a great way to describe it, and I just wanted some further clarification on how to do it because I wanted to learn that it is.

Did we say that it was us?

Oh? Cool? Did that all you wanted to say to it? Well, I mean I wanted to talk to her in person, obviously, but this is not what I intended. But anyway, Sarah, give us a call back if you can, because I'd love to hear more about how you finger v out of yourself. That definitely came out wrong. Sorry, Sarah, I meant how you silence your farts is probably a better way to say it far out. I had no idea what would sound like that. It was only until it was out. So she's just going to get that. How do we delete that? Someone has to steal her phone. That's technically that is what she does. Sound a very bad thing.

That is the best thing that happened on record.

Damn it. No, someone needs to steal her phone. Hey, babe, where does she live?

I'm not your ab heard that? Did you hear that? Analys? Did you hear that?

I missed it?

Okay, okay, I'll let you know. So we just called Sarah and it turns out her name is not Sarah.

A woman who uses her finger to silence her farts.

Wood. He's been trying to get onto her, and then we obviously asked her the question that we wanted to ask her, But the way that came out was, Hey, I've just been wanting.

To know how you think of out of yourself. I know it's bad, it's really bad. No, I know it's bad. I didn't realize. I didn't realize as I went for it. I didn't realize. But what I'm thinking is, how do you surely we can delete that or it's a voice maybe in undated with a voicemail. I'm gonna call her all night and then she's gonna think she's got a virus and delete her phone. Yeah, we have to bury the voicemail. Okay, call her again. Well, guys, I apologize. I apologize. I apologized.

Yeah, you gotta apologize. Absolutely, call it back.

It's call it back.

There might be I really hope she picks up.

I'd love to apologize. I would you. She'll get this voicemail.

Before, let me message and I'll call you back.

Hey, Sarah, are you going? I just left? Do you have a voice power before? It's of utmost importance. Just don't don't listen to that, Just to likeate that immediately if that is okay, And I hope that doesn't rouse your curiosity because there's absolutely no reason for it to do such a thing anyway. It's also will, by the way, not perfect.

It's also.

Oh that was really really fun, very very good fun to the ads.

Woods is going to uh, I don't know, to steal her fun and dug bit of just fair on the other side, joins us, and you guys get the full update on where these tattoos are at what you now it is three tattoos. You might need to get a fourth. How do you think about your Who's the highest highest grossing only fans actress, content creator in Australia. She joined us earlier in the week for what is just an incredible story, truly former V.

Eight supercar driver. She goes into all of this in the chat.

Now she does, and we're going to play that for you in four guys because you can learn how much money she makes her stance on pawn I thought was I did not expect. The only thing that I think you need to know about her behind the scenes is that we would never have had her in the studio. And now he's not here because he's at a wedding in Bali. But Captain Poopants booked her, and weirdly he booked her. He's the only one that books her. So, like Analyse, you normally book the guests, right usually, but pooh Pants just comes in every two years and go those guys, Rene, Renee, Gracie, let's get her in.

He does send some suggestions. Yes this wasn't a suggestion though, because that would come through you. This was like Captain's call. He just walked in here and goes, guys, renee Gracie tomorrow three pm.

It was.

It was Tony Abbott giving Prince Philip the Knighthood of Australia. Yeah.

Absolutely. The previous one he did was Rob Sneider. He was like, yeah, we just came in one day and he was like, hey, guys, we've got Schneider tomorrow and we're like Rob Schneider, the guy from the nineties. You've got to sit down with Rob Schneider. Twenty minutes sit down.

Yeah, and then we had to convince him that Rob Schneider was canceled effectively and that all of his content had at aged given that it was all, you know, largely misogynistic humor. Yeah, and then he wheeled out Gracie a little bit later. So can you confirm or deny he booked Gracie for a discount on her only fans.

I can neither confirm nor deny, but I can definitely confirm he booked the guests. Yeah right, Okay, okay, I'm reading between the lines there. I'm here and we all are.

Because she wasn't even to say he just recently got his corporate card canceled.

I didn't know that, did he Actually? Oh yeah, wow, that might have been us. Anyway, here is Herne Gracie. So we've spoken on the phone before. But I suppose for everyone playing at home, you have a very very interesting professional life for most people. Can you explain the dichotomy between the two jobs that I suppose you operate in.

Well, I guess the first one would have been a racing car driver. That was my first career, or attempt at a career, and I did that for a little while. I was prim proper, made to look a certain way, made to act a certain way. Then I disappeared into the distance, fell out of love with the sport COVID, hit desperate times, just moved back from Melbourne, actually back to Queensland, living with my dad. Needed some money, failed racing career, My life was over. My plan a and only plan in life was to race cars and it didn't work out.

And I just needed a bit of extra money in my.

Back pocket and discovered OnlyFans and then I became an online content creator and a very successful OnlyFans creator.

So when you say a little bit of extra money in your back pocket, how much did that turn out to be.

Well, the aim was maybe a couple hundred bucks, five hundred bucks. Maybe, I'm like, surely I've got enough fans.

Someone's going to give me something if I ask for it.

But yeah, I made like eighty thousand US dollars within the first couple.

Of hours hours.

Yeah, yeah, Like I started it, I think at like seven o'clock at nighttime, and then by midnight it was like at eighty thousand US dollars.

I'm not super familiar with only fans, but.

That's what they all say.

Only what if I had a dollar for every time I had a witcher?

But is the eighty thousand US dollars is that people that are subscribing to follow your content?

Yeah, so it.

Actually wasn't from the subscription. The money came from people actually going, Oh, my god, I'm your biggest fan. Here's one hundred dollars. I met you when you were thirteen at Disco cart track.

I love you.

Here's a hundred bucks. It was like support. It was people, and then you had people going, oh, can you show me this.

I'll give you this, and then they'd send me five hundred bucks in the hope that they could see something that I wasn't willing to provide at the time, but people just gave me money for existing, which was like the coolest thing ever.

That is extraordinary.

People can see this. Renee Gracie Fireproof is now streaming only on Standing and no, we've all got stand now because of the games, so you can go and see how Renee.

Got into this.

So can I ask, like, obviously, one of the big buzzwords is you know, porn, addiction and all that sort of stuff. At the moment, particularly, there's loads of mums and kids and stuff that listened to us.

You aware of that.

Where's the boundary for you within that? I know you said before there are things that people were asking you to do that you didn't feel comfortable doing. How do you kind of maintain a sense of like ethics around doing what you're doing whilst being aware of how potentially damaged things like porn can be for young boys or just younger people in general.

Obviously, I have morals.

I sort of have a rule that I won't do anything that's actually illegal, or if I have to pretend to do something on a video that is still illegal, I won't do it. That's sort of like where I draw the line. But I think from my personal experience, I have saved lives. I have saved lives with men who have been broken up. They are depressed, they are lonely, their wife just left them, they haven't seen their kids in five years.

I see the opposite side.

And I understand that there is a really negative side, but I have no doubt in my mind that I have probably talked to people of potentially being in a really deep dark place. I also know that my sight and what us girls and females and creators can provide on this page is something that a lot of people can't get, which is potentially where those addictive personalities develop, wanting more, more, more, more and more, where all of a sudden they don't have to watch hours and hours and hours and hours of porn because they've got this really person connection with somebody. So while there are negatives, and there's always going to be people who take things too far, of course, anything you do in life, it's not just porn, obviously, but I really feel like this industry, which is why it is a billion dollar industry and one of the longer standing industries ever, is it provides something and I think only fans is the new wave of providing something that has never been provided before.

Well, I think that's an amazing answer because I know that psychologically if anyone that has read Johann Hari's Lost Connections, his thesis is that connection is the opposite of addiction. So you have porn addiction down one end, which is more and more. You're saying, if you create an only fans connection with one what do you call it, models, creator creators, then that will supplant the porn addiction that they've created.

Yeah, and it stops people.

That's interesting looking for things that all of a sudden they're not attainable because they're watching these crazy things or just consuming so much content where they take away they go only fans. They might still subscribe to several girls, but they're having connections and relationships that porn wasn't able to give them. But that's what they're actually chasing in the long run.

Wow, well said can I ask you? And I you said before, so you one of your lines is I won't do anything illegal or even make it seem like I'm faking to do something illegal. What are these illegal things that people are requesting?

Incest stuff that's a that's a common that's yeah, that's that's been asked for.

Definitely.

I do have people like pretending that they wish that I was, you know, acting with both father and son and and things like that.

So yeah, incest is one thing. So that's that's a that's a no for me unfortunately.

And you you won't even fake that you're seen.

I won't do it in.

Real life, and I and I won't fake to do something that's illegal like that. That's where I draw the line anything in a relationship. No, I sort of I find people that come on in feature and I try to for a little while. Yeah, I have jet like relationships, but it's quite hard to have a serious relationship unfortunately.

Is that hard?

Yeah, to the point where you're like, I really like you.

But yeah, I kind of need to draw the line because that's when feelings and stuff get in the way and I can't. I've got it's a bigger picture unfortunately, and I'm not really in the position I don't want to get married or have children, so it's kind of like what I'm hanging on for, you know what I mean. So I kind of it's hard because I would I've always grown up never mixed business with pleasure, but unfortunately now that's my job.

So it's very difficult. It's very difficult to do that line. So it is difficult.

But I'm lucky that I'm in a position where I sort of my future doesn't put me in a position where I'm really desperate to hang on to someone and find my person as of now, so it's easier for me to make less emotional decisions.

What's given you a sense of freedom? I'm hearing as you say that.

Yeah.

I think the other interesting relationship to look at with this is you started by saying that when you began your Only Fans, Paige, you were living with your dad. That conversation, yeah, did you speak to him before you started? It was that first night, discreet and secret away from him or no.

I'm very fortunate to have a dad who, well, he supported me in motorsport, so I would say that I have a dad that's quite open minded and doesn't really mind as long. Dad's sort of thing with me growing up is as long as you're committed to it, as long as you commit one hundred percent and you give it, you're all He's all in and he doesn't really care what it is. I just went up to him because I had so much money that was coming through. I'm like, oh, far out, Like I need to figure out what's if this is real, and I need to obviously set myself up and make sure I manage this properly. And I'm like, I'm living with dad. He's going to be the first person to know when I start making money because I'm going to start buying all these things and I'm not going to be able to get away with it money from So I'm like, he's gonna be the first question person to question me. So and then he was just like, oh, well, see if it's real, come back to me in a week and see if the money hits your bank account.

We can go from there.

So he kind of didn't really really care. He sort of wanted to see that it was legit. There were some times in the beginning where it got really hard. I got a lot of hate for in the beginning not doing everything on my platform.

So I've got a lot of a lot of right So if you don't do what people ask you to do, they get angry.

Yeah, people were getting frustrated with me, and it wasn't quite comfortable and I was like, I can't do this and maybe you know, this wasn't something that I should have done.

And he's like, don't stop now, money is too good.

Don't you just stop?

And I was like, okay, keep going. Here's supportive.

Yeah, great message.

Here's a huge star on the documentary. Actually, everyone everyone keeps coming up to me.

I love your day.

And he gets recognized in public now he told me he was all a little ale chuffed about it.

So yeah, well, you can check out the documentary Renee Gracie Fireproof only on stand Renee, thanks so much for coming in if you want to go and see. Renee has got a brand new podcast as well. It's called in the back Seat Talking to People That Unconventional Roads to Success, which I suppose is your story as well.

Yeah, so people can get that wherever they stream their podcast.

If whar more Ever, Nay, it's been loving to meet you.

Thank you so much.

What a great, amazing.

Story to finally come in.

There you go, that's Rene Grazie.

Unbelievable chat, unbelievable woman.

It's one of the great stories truly.

I think the interesting thing about listening to that is if you don't know what she looks like, the way that she talks, you don't expect, do you know what I mean? Like she's kind of defies stereotypes.

And she's very like for something that there's obviously a level of shame and judgment around only fans content creators. I think the way that she holds herself talking about it and no questions are of flemus Like we were asking as you just heard, I was asking.

About does dad know about it? You're like, you know, partners, do they know about it?

And she just she's so comfortable and at ease within the industry that she's working in. I thought it was awesome one hundred cent it was here. She was great. Now Woods before we get out of here.

Obviously, everyone listening to this, given that we're not doing a daily show podcast anymore, wants to know the update on the tattoos. So here's a little montage of where we left you guys last time.

Montag gold paris twenty three plus one. Just a simple line through Shane, I'm doubling down.

Will I want to be a legend. I've always wanted to be a legend, and I can only become a legend by backing people before they've won gold medals.

Have you spelled your name right?

Absolutely?

I have.

I'm not an idiot. Spell it for me j A M I M A montag No, No are you guys?

No?

No, Oh my god.

That's your fault because I was in a rush. Saw what do I thought? You don't spelled Jemima j A M I am GEMI. I think there are gem Imers out there. That's the guy. Guy didn't speak English. I didn't speak a word of English. It was really quite hard to translate. Anyway, that's fine. No one will notice that. You guys didn't notice it.

I hadn't seen it. I ain't seen her close.

Old Joe's the first person that saw it.

I'm close. Or you've spelt it like Jemima puddle duck.

Wow, no one will notice that.

And that's wow.

That's easy anyway.

You've spelt it jam i'ma like strawberry jam Ima.

It's fine. Oh man.

We minded to cross out the A and put a little above it.

If she wins. So the first step after all of that was to speak to Jemima's mum. So this is the day after her twenty kilometer individual event, and well, I wanted to know from her, did you mama win golf? No, I'm doing obviously still unbelievable efforts to compete at the Games. How did she go, Amanda?

Look, she had really an amazing race and she's still got to medal.

But it was bronze.

Wow, still amazing. No, so no, And there's a really hard line for us to tread in all of this, particularly you, because obviously her winning a bronze medal at the at the Games is phenomenal, extraordinary, Like it really is just the epitome of success. You're at the Olympics, so let's start that is successful. Getting any sort of metal you are that is successful. But she didn't wish it's cold, So it's a failure in through the lens of the tattoo that you have on your legs. So you and I constantly are having these chats with the producers every time that we touch base with Jemima's mum, And you're going to hear it again when Jemima actually joined us, where the producers have to come in here and say to us, guys, just reminder, she did well. She she won a bronze medal. Okay, so let's just make sure we celebrate her before we get into the BacT that you put a line through her name. So we're going to get to that very very shortly, and just where the Jemima stuff continues to go, because we did ever on the show.

But before we get there, what are you? Went and got another tat women's fifteen hundred meters. Yep, there is an Australian woman by the name of Jessica Hull yeap. Three to four weeks ago she broke the world record for two kilometers. I say, yep, we make these tats right, and we both add Jessica Hull to our bodies celebrating her gold.

I think you're getting it by yourself.

I cannot believe you. You are going to be a groomsman at my winning and you are letting me Are you kidding? Well, yes, I just I feel like So this was I guess now half a week ago. There's not much time of the games left, so I had to go again. Incredibly disappointing that you didn't join me. I extended an olive branch.

There, and that's just that's just, that's just you know, I wanted to you didn't I wanted to you did not wanted to. That's just my content brain thinking though, because you know they say people find it hard to differentiate us. I was like, this is this is this is great character growth for you. You know what is the crazy guy that gets tattoos? Will's the conservative guy? And it pains me, but that was the that was the muscle that I was using in that instant well way to play a role mate.

And I will continue to play my role as moron. So speaking of that too. Like literally twenty four hours after I got the tattoo of Jessica Hall, who is still very much alive in the fifteen hundred meters, you informed me live on the radio show that jess Montag was actually competing in a second event. It was the twenty or the forty kilometer mixed relay. By the way, Jess Montagma Montaigl j very good or is it? Or is it Jam? I'm no, whis gem? I definitely not Jess Yeah yeah, yeah, I mean this is problem. I'm not really a big details guy. Anyway, this is this is now live on the radio show, as you're informing me that Jemima Montag is still a chance to win a goal.

She's racing again, mixed a walk. They're in the last five case.

Oh my god.

For licensing reasons, had to do guttural noises to describe what's happening, and you've had to interpret it.

My interpretation, going well.

Going really well, hit the wall, bugger. Not amazing, but improvement. She's unbelievable if she.

Wins a gold Jemima montag twice on your legs, you've crossed out jam Eimer's name. She's running for another goal. The tattoo could be live again. Your leg is just looking more and more like a year four's piece of homework that's been corrected with scratches, corrections and lines that will be there permanently. And the great new was after all of this, after Jemima's race, she was the one that came on and we got to talk to her about the fact that, unfortunately for you woulds, she did not win another gold medal. That was he You know, you've got to have one foot on the ground at all times. Are you conscious of that, Like when you're just walking along the beach, like, oh, that would have been a fowl. Oh that would have been a fowl. Like is that going off?

And you end it.

Yeah, when I'm walking just casually, I am thinking about it.

You know, when you're at the supermarket and they announced that, like you know, lane four is now open, and everyone rushes over. Do you just go into a power walk and dominate everyone?

Definitely?

Yeah.

If you have to get to a tram across a plane, oh my god.

Yeah yeah, chasing a tram, power walking would be unbelievable.

Absolutely, Or even just in places where you can't run, so like you know, meeting rooms university and can run.

Yeah, anytime the lifeguard's liked no running, then I just race walk a little faster than run and run. They feel silly, really great.

Stumbled across an article Jemima about you a year ago second in the World Change. So I was like, here we go, here we bloody go, Joan Montag. And then I saw this amazing video that you did about the nutrition changes that you were making to your diet as well, and I was like, if she's eaten right and she's coming second in World Championships, this is my girl.

Well I'm flattered.

You know.

Most Olympians get the Olympic Rings tattoo, and I'm even agonizing over that decision because it's so permanent. So if you've got my name's felt wrong, right, let's.

Just focus on that actually, because you've said wrong, but I'm still not one hundred percent sure. So you you definitely spell your name j E M not not j A M.

Well for now, but mum's considering changing it after your little chat with her.

What's this face?

We did speak to your mama after your first twenty K walk, So Jemima or jam Iima as we call you on this show. The next installment is that after the twenty k walk, amazing that you won the bronze, but because wood is tattoo says gold Paris twenty three plus one. He then gets tattooed a line through your name so it's Jemima Montag and then crossed out Jemima Montag. And then yesterday on the show, we found out that you were racing again. He didn't realize that you were doing the forty k mixed relay walk as well, so there.

Was as Jemima said, that's a new event, you know, So there was this absolute panic here in the studio as he's talking about how he is going to get the tattoo the line through your name erased so that the tattoo will be reinstated.

So there was all sorts of emotions going on and you were reeling them in at the end of the forty k yesterday as well, so he was looking at some severe tattoo correction surgery if you guys had have come through with the gold. But either way, I wanted to get you up to speed there. I mean, we've been obviously admirers of yours from afar as Has Australia, but you have meant so much to this radio show and everybody who has listened we've followed your journey, so congratulations.

Thanks so much. I mean you should have got Mena Kennedy on you, either of the.

Fox sisters, that's right. I mean we can go through the Ariana Tipmus would have been a good while.

I preferred you. I referred to you Jamimah. Maybe I can cross that Paris and write La as well.

Very nice.

I think your Remia is suitably freaked out that a guy in Australia is getting her name tattooed on you. That's fair enough, Remimah.

When did you, Jemima, when did you find out that I had tattooed your name on my body the.

Night the night after I'd competed, we were out on an Italian restaurant to celebrate and my sister, Yeah, pulled out her phone and you sing, this must have been on social media. And then I was being senter by school friends. Everyone was eating it up, loved it.

That's amazing.

Have you ever had anyone else tattoo your name on them?

No?

I've told my boyfriend many times he's welcome to tattooed across his heart, and he's laughed at that.

So so he is the only man. So what is the only man on the planet with your name tattooed on him? That's right, sort of my name, sort of your name and.

Then crossed out as well. So it's just just a final throw the stump. See, Jemima, would you be open at all to changing your name to jam Maima? Sure, that's massive. I'm taking that as gospel. I'll do the paperwork, Jemima amazing talking to Jemima obviously a legend. Two bronze medals is an extraordinary, extraordinary effort. So I'm so happy she had come on the show and have a laugh about that. Yeah, And I think also I mean, she was laughing about it, but there was that moment at the end there where she was like, it is totally bizarre that another a man who isn't my boyfriend has my name tattooed on his body. Yees, will always be the case, even if there is a line through it. That is the case.

Well, as I said to you a number of times, you know, before we do, you want me to just do the interview by myself because at the end of the day, you're a guy who's fourteen years older than her that's got her name tattoo on your body nine years.

But yes, that that is super strange. The other woman on my leg is Jessica Hull who got through the heats on Tuesday Night. That's all I know at this point of the recording of this podcast. That's all that I know. But we did decide to speak to Georgie Tunney, who is a bit of an expert on the games.

At the moment, she's got her own games podcasts. Yeah two Good Sports. Yes, well it's a sport podcast, but at the moment they specialized day to day on the goings on all the games, so we wanted to get Tunny off. They did gold medal predictions.

We found out really should have listened to that pod, but I wanted to ask Georgie specifically, is Jessica Hull a good chance?

So we needed to become in as consultant going forward because I can crossing out jess Hull, I know, and I say that as a jeffs Whule lover. I think she'll podium. I don't think she'll win goal.

Who's beating her?

Faith kipp Yogan.

Yeah, it's an incredible runner, so I think that she will be out for blood in this race. Now, jess Woodie, the good thing for you is that only recently she's recorded the fifth fastest time ever in this event, so in a fifteen ever. Wow, she's informed she's also broken a world record for the two thousand meters.

That's what I saw and then impulsively went to the tattoo parlor and was like, I'm inking that girl up right now. She's broken around.

Yeah, this is where you need to call Jelmy and I and we could have told you that the two thousand meters actually isn't a game's event, it's not.

Part of the program, so she may as well have broken the world record.

For Tetris is what you're telling me.

So there you go, guys. I mean by the time we come back to this woods, you will know whether one of the tatters on your leg is actually relevant and means something well, and the question.

I mean this.

The next podcast comes out in a week. A lot can have it in a week. I could put someone else on my leg. I really, I don't know. I don't know what the future will need to be. It needs to be an event in Paris so the Paralympics start. I think next week we need to put it down. I don't think I can do it best to put it I refuse to put it down.

That's fine, but I think that might be something in your own time.

I can't say it on the radio anymore.

I think you should get finger velve No, don't. Yeah, I think finger Vel is going to go in there one of the great moments on the podcast.

Hope you guys have enjoyed it. We will see you next week.

You'

Will and Woody

Raw and unsalted, Will & Woody have made a vow: to make a 'genuine attempt' at being less crap and m 
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