What if the biggest barrier to better sex isn’t your body, your partner, or your libido, but the shame and silence surrounding it?

In this episode, Dr Mariam sits down with Australia’s go-to sexologist, Chantelle Otten, for a candid, practical and deeply reassuring conversation about sex, intimacy and why so many of us are still too embarrassed to talk about what’s happening in the bedroom.

From mismatched libidos and postpartum desire dips to painful sex, vaginismus and the mental load that can kill the mood before anyone even makes it to bed, Chantelle explains why great sex isn’t about performance, it’s about curiosity, communication and giving yourself permission to change the rules.

Plus, she answers your anonymous listener questions: Why can you orgasm alone but not with a partner? Is it normal to lose all desire after kids? And what should you know before going to your first sex party?

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CREDITS

Hosts: Claire Murphy and Dr Mariam

Guest: Chantelle Otten

Senior Producer: Tahli Blackman

Executive Producer: Grace Rouvray

Group Executive Producer: Ilaria Brophy

Audio Producer: Scott Stronach

Social Producer: Elly Moore

Mamamia acknowledges the Traditional Owners of the Land we have recorded this podcast on, the Gadigal people of the Eora Nation. We pay our respects to their Elders past and present, and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures.

Information discussed in Well. is for educational purposes only and is not intended to provide professional medical advice. Listeners should seek their own medical advice, specific to their circumstances, from their treating doctor or health care professional.

What if the biggest barrier to better sex isn&rsquo;t your body, your partner, or your libido, but the shame and silence surrounding it?
In this episode, Dr Mariam sits down with Australia&rsquo;s go-to sexologist, Chantelle Otten, for a candid, practical and deeply reassuring conversation about sex, intimacy and why so many of us are still too embarrassed to talk about what&rsquo;s happening in the bedroom.
From mismatched libidos and postpartum desire dips to painful sex, vaginismus and the mental load that can kill the mood before anyone even makes it to bed, Chantelle explains why great sex isn&rsquo;t about performance, it&rsquo;s about curiosity, communication and giving yourself permission to change the rules.
Plus, she answers your anonymous listener questions: Why can you orgasm alone but not with a partner? Is it normal to lose all desire after kids? And what should you know before going to your first sex party?
GET IN TOUCH
Sign up to the&nbsp;<a href="https://www.mamamia.com.au/newsletter/well/">Well Newsletter</a> to receive your weekly dose of trusted health expertise without the medical jargon.
Ask a question of our experts or share your story, feedback, or dilemma - you can send it anonymously <a href="https://jlmf9165xmv.typeform.com/waiting-room?typeform-source=www.mamamia.com.au">here</a>, email here or leave us a voice note <a href="https://help.mamamia.com.au/en-US/send-a-podcast-voice-note-467960">here</a>.
Ask The Doc: Ask us a question in <a href="https://jlmf9165xmv.typeform.com/waiting-room?typeform-source=www.mamamia.com.au">The Waiting Room</a>.
Follow us on <a href="https://www.instagram.com/wellbymamamia/?hl=en">Instagram</a> and <a href="https://www.tiktok.com/@wellbymamamia">Tiktok</a>.
<a href="https://www.mamamia.com.au/subscribe">Support independent women&rsquo;s media by becoming a Mamamia subscriber</a>
New Mamamia subscribers get $40 off &mdash; $20 off an annual membership and $20 off your TWOOBS order. <a href="https://www.mamamia.com.au/twoobs-discount-code/?utm_source=shownotes&amp;utm_medium=podcast&amp;utm_campaign=discounts&amp;utm_content=twoobs-ron">Click here to subscribe</a>. Already a subscriber? <a href="https://www.mamamia.com.au/subscriber-hub/exclusive-offers/">Click here for your $20 TWOOBS discount code</a>. T&amp;C's apply.
CREDITS
Hosts: <a href="https://www.instagram.com/clairemurphyyukich/?hl=en">Claire Murphy</a> and <a href="https://www.instagram.com/ask.the.dr/?hl=en">Dr Mariam</a>
Guest: Chantelle Otten
Senior Producer: Tahli Blackman
Executive Producer: Grace Rouvray
Group Executive Producer: Ilaria Brophy
Audio Producer: Scott Stronach
Social Producer: Elly Moore
Mamamia acknowledges the Traditional Owners of the Land we have recorded this podcast on, the Gadigal people of the Eora Nation. We pay our respects to their Elders past and present, and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures. Information discussed in Well. is for educational purposes only and is not intended to provide professional medical advice. Listeners should seek their own medical advice, specific to their circumstances, from their treating doctor or health care professional.

Well is a podcast about the taboo, the annoying, the embarrassing and the scary. We cover the concerns you’re probably considering seeing a doctor about, from insomnia to weird periods to how to prevent dementia. 

The full body health check for the Australian woman, hosted by Claire Murphy and Dr Mariam.

Well. The podcast for every woman with a body. 

Well is a podcast about the taboo, the annoying, the embarrassing and the scary.&nbsp;We cover the concerns you&rsquo;re probably considering seeing a doctor about, from insomnia to weird periods to how to prevent dementia.&nbsp;
The full body health check for the Australian woman, hosted by Claire Murphy&nbsp;and Dr Mariam.
Well. The podcast for every woman with a body.&nbsp;

Well.

Why Sexologist Chantelle Otten Wants You To Start Pashing Again

https://api.omny.fm/orgs/3ea926be-9be7-482a-8ac3-a44f016e43d1/clips/c91ab018-249a-44fd-83f5-b45500437fbb/transcript