In this episode of Untidy, Hannah and Matty speak to Melissa Banks, a team leader, early childhood educator, step-mum to two, and mum to 10-year-old, Lilly, who embarked on a gender identity journey at age seven. Melissa shares her touching and illuminating story of finding her way through parenting a gender-questioning child when there was no real roadmap to go by.

They discuss how their journey manifested and what steps they took to start moving forward, how they sought support from family, friends, the school, and other members of the rainbow community, how Melissa surrendered to an uncertain journey of open-ended exploration, the issues they faced, and the gift that it’s ultimately given them both along the way.

This episode is a beautiful example of respectful, responsive parenting and finding a way forward by allowing the child to be the master of their own experience. Happy listening!

The book mentioned in the podcast: 
The Gender Creative Child by Diane Ehrensaft 

If you want to hear more Untidy episodes about childhood and parenting journeys for LGBTQIA+ kids and parents, check out ‘Welcome to the good room with Chris Parker’, and, ‘Not like other dads with Sean Szeps’.

You can find Melissa on Instagram @picsbymu.

If you enjoy this episode of Untidy, please support the show by subscribing in your podcast app and tapping the ‘+ follow’ button. That way, you’ll never miss an episode. Help us to keep building this supportive community – subscribe, share an episode with a mate, and chuck us a 5-star review. Thank you for listening and supporting our independent production! You’re the best!

Untidy is made for you – the people right at the heart of this steaming hot mess we call parenthood! Follow the show and DM us on Instagram @untidypodcast or email hello@untidypodcast.com. Your stories and ideas to help us shape the show! Find us online at Untidy podcast. Find Matilda at @matootles and get your copy of The Feel Good Guide. Find Hannah at @hannahedavison and her My Big Moments children’s books at @mybigmoments. Enter code UNTIDY at checkout for 10% off your order.

In this episode of Untidy, Hannah and Matty speak to Melissa Banks, a team leader, early childhood educator, step-mum to two, and mum to 10-year-old, Lilly, who embarked on a gender identity journey at age seven. Melissa shares her touching and illuminating story of finding her way through parenting a gender-questioning child when there was no real roadmap to go by.
They discuss how their journey manifested and what steps they took to start moving forward, how they sought support from family, friends, the school, and other members of the rainbow community, how Melissa surrendered to an uncertain journey of open-ended exploration, the issues they faced, and the gift that it’s ultimately given them both along the way.
This episode is a beautiful example of respectful, responsive parenting and finding a way forward by allowing the child to be the master of their own experience. Happy listening!
The book mentioned in the podcast:  <a href="https://www.thenile.co.nz/books/diane-ehrensaft/gender-creative-child/9781615193066?gad_source=1&amp;gclid=Cj0KCQjwjNS3BhChARIsAOxBM6oiXoj4qtksaFT1RVbL-38NyIY5joE7HERqV1DOBH1m2RSFmrJc-p4aAh5GEALw_wcB">The Gender Creative Child by Diane Ehrensaft </a>
If you want to hear more Untidy episodes about childhood and parenting journeys for LGBTQIA+ kids and parents, check out <a href="https://open.spotify.com/episode/5Dkn3KkeuC999tOYfJXlXM?si=31a6962c70f64af9">‘Welcome to the good room with Chris Parker’</a>, and, <a href="https://open.spotify.com/episode/6JPAgCugyjY0RJfXdm7s52?si=b24d9af9d77041d3">‘Not like other dads with Sean Szeps’</a>.
You can find Melissa on Instagram <a href="https://www.instagram.com/picsbymu/">@picsbymu</a>.
If you enjoy this episode of Untidy, please support the show by subscribing in your podcast app and tapping the ‘+ follow’ button. That way, you’ll never miss an episode. Help us to keep building this supportive community – subscribe, share an episode with a mate, and chuck us a 5-star review. Thank you for listening and supporting our independent production! You’re the best!
Untidy is made for you – the people right at the heart of this steaming hot mess we call parenthood! Follow the show and DM us on Instagram <a href="https://www.instagram.com/untidypodcast/">@untidypodcast</a> or email hello@untidypodcast.com. Your stories and ideas to help us shape the show! Find us online at<a href="https://www.untidypodcast.com/"> Untidy podcast</a>. Find Matilda at <a href="https://www.instagram.com/matootles/">@matootles</a> and get your copy of <a href="https://www.whitcoulls.co.nz/the-feel-good-guide-6481627">The Feel Good Guide</a>. Find Hannah at <a href="https://www.instagram.com/hannahedavison/">@hannahedavison</a> and her <a href="https://mybigmoments.com/">My Big Moments</a> children’s books at <a href="https://www.instagram.com/mybigmoments/">@mybigmoments</a>. Enter code UNTIDY at checkout for 10% off your order.

Untidy podcast honours the person within the parent. Hosts, Matilda Green and Hannah Davison dive into the undergrowth of sex and relationships, mental health, healing, body issues, identity questions, and more with a range of guests. Connect, laugh, learn, and keep moving forward. 

Follow the show and get in touch on Instagram @untidypodcast. Follow Matilda at @matootles and Hannah’s work at My Big Moments and @mybigmoments.

Untidy podcast honours the person within the parent. Hosts, Matilda Green and Hannah Davison dive into the undergrowth of sex and relationships, mental health, healing, body issues, identity questions, and more with a range of guests. Connect, laugh, learn, and keep moving forward. Follow the show and get in touch on Instagram @untidypodcast. Follow Matilda at @matootles and Hannah’s work at My Big Moments and @mybigmoments.

Untidy

Made for you, the people right at the heart of this steaming hot mess! Untidy podcast honours the person within the parent. Hosts Matilda Green and Hannah Davison dive into the undergrowth of sex and relationships, mental health, healing, body issues, identity questions, parenting, and much more with a range of incredible guests. Come along to connect, laugh, learn, and keep moving forward. 

Follow the show and get in touch on Instagram @untidypodcast, watch us on YouTube, and TikTok. Follow Matilda at @matootles, Hannah at @hannahedavison, and My Big Moments kids' books at @mybigmoments. Check out the website at Untidy podcast. Get in touch!

Made for you, the people right at the heart of this steaming hot mess! Untidy podcast honours the person within the parent. Hosts Matilda Green and Hannah Davison dive into the undergrowth of sex and relationships, mental health, healing, body issues, identity questions, parenting, and much more with a range of incredible guests. Come along to connect, laugh, learn, and keep moving forward.&nbsp; Follow the show and get in touch on Instagram <a href="https://www.instagram.com/untidypodcast/">@untidypodcast</a>, watch us on&nbsp;<a href="https://www.youtube.com/@Untidypodcast">YouTube</a>, and <a href="https://www.tiktok.com/@untidypodcast">TikTok</a>. Follow Matilda at <a href="https://www.instagram.com/matootles">@matootles</a>, Hannah at <a href="https://www.instagram.com/hannahedavison">@hannahedavison</a>, and My Big Moments kids' books at <a href="https://www.instagram.com/mybigmoments">@mybigmoments</a>. Check out the website at <a href="https://www.untidypodcast.com/">Untidy podcast</a>. Get in touch!