Two Ts In A Pod with Teddi Mellencamp and Tamra JudgeTwo Ts Presents: Popping Off: The Valley + Vanderpump Villa
Teddi and Emily are recapping The Valley Ep 3 & 4 and Vanderpump Villa Ep 2 &3!
Hi guys.
This is Teddy Mellencamp and I'm joined by my friend Emily Simpson for our new spin off show Popping Off, where we are digging deep on this season of Banner Pump Rules. So here we are back another episode of Popping Off with myself, Teddy Mellencamp and.
Emily Simpson, and we are recapping episode two of the Valley. Or no, no, it's episode three. It's you know what?
Wake up, Emily.
I know, I'm sorry, Episode three of the Valley. This is why you don't get to do intros. I will shut up from now on. I will just sit here. I want you to sit there in front of your natural blue background. Why sit in front of my fancy pink one. It's really a lot.
I feel like I'm really coming around to the Valley, Like I really like it.
I like the Valley. There's a lot going on. I feel like it's really good. I feel like.
We get to see everybody's crazy, but it's like a natural crazy.
Like I don't think anybody's crazy is not.
A scripted crazy, not even scripted, but like this is just them being who they are, and yeah, they can't even help themselves. Like there's nothing even performative at this point.
I feel like we could we could fit right in, Like we should just buy houses right near them and just kind of wiggle our way in. I live kind of near them.
I don't. I mean, I mean, I need.
To start showing up at Farmers Marcus with your kids and stuff and to see what happens.
I mean, I could, like, I feel, I just don't. Who would I come in as like good friends with that? That's going to be the problem even if I'm do you have Brittany?
I feel like I love Brittany, but I don't know. I feel Brittany. You like fair food.
Listen, I like.
What's it called. What's the cheeseballs called cheeseballs?
Cheese?
No, Mama's cheese beer cheese.
Beer cheese.
Is beer cheese. Similar to Queso because I love Queso. I thought Queso is just cheese cheese. Is Queso is cheese in Spanish?
No, but like Queso, dip is like you get velveta and then you put in rotel and then you put it in the microwave and it's a little heavenly treat.
And I feel like, yeah, but I don't know if it's just called queso because that's like calling like jaso dip soda.
It's like oh Mama's beer cheese. It's a similar I guess according to Google, it's a similar consistency, but the cheese in this instance is made with beer. I would be open to trying it. I need to like beer. I like apple cider beer. I'm not like a logger drinker, but I could have like I think I could have a beer, Like if I'm at a sushi restaurant, I like to have soake and a beer.
Okay, that's it, Well, you know, okay, Okay, Emily, I think we should take a field trip to Jackson's. I think we should just show up instead at the bar. Would you rather go to Jax's or what are the shorts?
Is? Shorts and Sandy's.
I'd rather go to Jacks's. Yeah, I mean too, and that's closer to my house. I find Jax to be thoroughly entertaining. Who would you rather be married to Jack's or Jesse? Oh may, I would rather be married to Jacks. I'd take him all day long for that guy. They're both so bad. They're both so bad.
I mean, both options are just terrible. I mean even going back to like Jesse doing this to the face, But either way, it starts out Brittany Jackson Sherry. They're at the Farmer's market again. I don't even remember this, but Brittany and Jacks go over everything that happened at their Girls' night slash guys Night. Kristen told the entire group that Janet accused Michelle of being racist and a Republican. I would like a word with production as to why we're getting this fight told in flashbacks, like what I want to see it in real time? Why is this flashbacks?
Yeah, I don't know. I got confused about that too.
I thought maybe I.
Missed something and I try to rewind it. I was like, did I just miss the whole fight? And now they're flashing back? And then I realized that that's how they're showing this fight is just in flashbacks.
I think they're I mean they're saying. Zach said on Nick's podcast that there will be a ton of flashbacks this season. So my guess is these flashbacks are happening because either there had to be a lot of editing to not get somebody canceled.
Probably we're throwing around a lot of accusations, a lot of political stuff, a lot of heavy things.
With people that have actually been canceled already. So, like, I, did you get canceled twice?
I'm sure I could figure out a way to get canceled again. But if you got canceled once and then they let you come back, do you get canceled again?
Or is there a different word for it?
I think then you're just done, You're just dead, You're bare, but you're deleted, deleted. I like deleted, But this part was a little bit interesting to me. At Jesse and Michelle's house, Michelle decides to FaceTime Janet and ask about the whole thing. Janet denies it, and she's pissed that Kristin would say something like that. Janet thinks the stems from her putting up a boundary with Kristin a year ago. Kristin likely doesn't want Alex to tell the guys, especially Luke, about his side of the breakup either. Kristen isn't the saint she's painting herself out to be. It seemed like a reach for me. I like Janet, I don't believe Janet in this circle. I don't believe Janet either. I was so frustrated by this whole argument the whole time because clearly the source of that he said she said bullshit was Janet. Yet no one's asking Janet or talking to Janet.
Also, when the flashback shows Janet at the fight and like they're.
All talking and I know, I'm like, Janet is eating this up.
And then Kristen's like trying. You can tell Kristen's in a panic state. She's like, I can't go after the pregnant girl. So she's like, I'm not going to do this with you right now, Janet. And Janet's like, I haven't even said up my nursery yet.
I think, a shit, this is good work.
I'm not going back to being an assistant because I just caused all this shit on this show and thank me later.
And yes, but not only does she cause all the shit on the show now a single person is questioning her. No one, They're all I don't know.
But also at this point, like Zach, I wish Zach would have just been like, yeah, we were all talking shit, we were all saying this.
But the part that was interesting to me was that.
This was the first time that Jesse and Michelle were able to laugh together in over three years and were attracted to one another.
Were they well, he was attracted to her. I don't know if it was a.
Mutual Well, she said, this is the first time I've laughed with him in over three years. Yeah, I'm like, but it was because she felt, in my opinion, it was because she felt he was complimenting her, not as a means to like have sex with her at that, like I think she thinks.
And he was talking about how she stood up for herself at the party and like the chair fell over, like that was a big turn on, and they were like, it really was the happiest they ever seen. Well, clearly she just needs to be more aggressive. He likes cheers thrown and like yelling. Well, what about when.
He said when we first met, she was in a trench coat naked, and then I poured hot wax on her. And then her response in her confessional about how the situation she goes. I turned down our first date and the only reason that I hooked up with him again was because I thought it was going to be a booty call at the end of a girl's Now, but now he's a booty call that's lasted blah blah blah years and I was like, yeah.
Well he said, she said something to the effective He's the kind of guy I'd never want to be with and I knew that, so I called him just for a booty call and it's been the longest booty call of.
Like my life.
I'm like, you married this guy knowing that he was not someone that you would want to spend the rest of your life with nor appropriate with.
I mean, I can say that I married my booty call, and I'm grateful I did. Are you talking about Edwin? Yeah, we were each other's booty call for quite some time, so, like, I do think there's room for that, But it takes work.
Once you get past being each other's booty call.
You can't solely raise a family and kids and have businesses and work together and do all these things off just having good sex. It ain't gonna last. No, because they don't have sex, especially now, they haven't had sex since they had is it Isabelle?
Yeah, what is your take on them having adult conversation and passing in front of her?
Well, I would be lying if I never said a curse word, like I've been in the car before and somebody's like cut me off, and I've been like shit, yeah, but I don't have adult conversations about like disputes in front of my kids. Have I accidentally cursed? Yes, I would be lying if I was like, oh, no, I've never it's never clipped out of my mouth. And death Dove has never repeated anything after me.
But I'm not talking drama and in front of children, yeah, exactly.
Like I'm not going to be like so and so called me a racist and then we were fighting and this, and I haven't been sexually attracted to you in three years, Like I'm not saying those things in front of my kid, right, But I don't know. During all of this, I'm like, what did we actually sign up for? And how did you find somebody that's a bigger mess than Jack's? And how are they friends? Yeah?
They used some model together or something in New York? Right, isn't that how they knew each other? Didn't they share an apartment in New York or something? That's what they said. I don't know, but Chris, still, I don't know.
I need more.
I need more flashbacks of that time to really I need some modeling photos from that time period, if someone could throw those into the episode too.
And I also need to know, is this modeling like these are brnent like you're seeing it in a magazine, or is this like you're the person standing outside of Abercrombie passing out pamphlets asking people to come in.
Or you're the person standing outside a Matter's store with a fifty percent offline spinning it.
But it feels like both Michelle and Janet's reaction to you said that I'm a racist and a Republican. They both look like they've had this conversation multiple times and they're not willing to have it on camera. Am I wrong on thinking that? Well?
No, I agree. I feel like there's a lot of things that were said, and a lot of people said things, and I think everybody's being so careful about what they're saying that it doesn't make sense and it's making Kristin look And I feel badly for Kristen because I think her only guilt is the fact that she repeated something, but no one else is fessing up, and no one else wants to, you know, wants to fess up to anything, so she just keeps taking hits from everybody, and then she can't and then she can't even really defend herself. But like Luke is coming in strong trying to defend her. He is, But did you see it as confessional? He has like those round red circles on his cheeks, Like it looks like like someone put a little bit of rouge right here. Do you notice that? He could say, I didn't even notice that.
But do you think that they're going to make it those two? No?
Absolutely not. I mean they want to have a child together. And the conversation revolves around how he will never live in La and how she will never leave La.
Yeah, like that's how is that going to work? Well, then we get to Nia getting ready to leave for twenty four hours to do a brand dealing, Danny alone with all the kids. I feel like Nia and Danny are the strings that hold this like shit show together, but yet they're not necessarily We're not getting much other than relatability to them, right, Yeah.
Well it's because I mean it's Beaker saying I like Danny. I think he's very logical. I think he kind of takes the middle road and just he makes comments that makes sense, Like he makes sense to me. Nia, I think she took a left turn somewhere and ended up in a reality show, and she doesn't know what happened or where that wrong turn was, but she'd like to go back and maybe rethink that work in the road, maybe go right.
She actually, I think might be that kind of person that never watched any of the shows prior to signing up and then is like shit, yeah, like I thought I could really get through this. Then we get Jack's at his new bar interviewing potential employees with the three business partners.
I actually enjoyed him trying not to look at the girls boobs. I mean, the only thing Jackson is invested.
In is.
He likes you could like see him like not me. He's like, I'm not gonna look down, not going to look down.
Then Brittany and Kristen meet for coffee, and Brittany uses it's the opportunity to bring up girls night. Brittany says Janet is really upset with Kristin of all people, Kristen is upset the blame is being put on her and she was the only one there. I feel like the story is it's it is it's taking too long to get to and I feel like Zach may have all the secrets hidden under his hair, like one of the trolls.
Listen up, if we just parted a little bit like this, we would see it like, well, no, what actually happened?
How'd you feel about the life slash marriage coach at Michelle and Jesse's house.
I thought you got right to the point. He's like, y'all are done. Yeah, He's like, so tell me the last time that you were attracted to him? Never?
Okay. She's like, I'm not interested in answering that question. I was like, this is not looking. It's not good. Almost is. It's like gonna be how Janet's kid arrives and there's no nursery, not even one thing set up. It looks like the baby nursery looks like arian his bedroom.
So like.
Going well, but Janet shows him Kristen's Instagram story about feeling disrespected. She doesn't understand how CHRISTI can feel that way. When she's thrown everyone under the bus. I feel like Janet's the bus driver. I feel like Janet is the bus driver. But I do think no matter who is wrong or right in any situation, A vague passive aggressive social media story.
It is never the answer. No, it's not, because then you can people can interpret that in any way they see fit to fill their own narrative, and you're just gonna get yourself in trouble.
Yeah, Like either say exactly what it is that you want to say or say nothing.
See, I'm not one of those vague Instagram story kind of people, are you.
I think I'm pretty direct, Like I'm like, no, this, uh, this person pissed me off, or I'll repost something that bothered me. But I don't know. I'd have to ask other people. But I'm pretty sure I'm quite direct with being an asshole me too, Like.
I don't beat around the bush. I don't put I don't post like quotes like you know, so everybody can be like, what's wrong, what happened?
I'll never post I can't say this. I don't post quotes in hopes that people are going like every morning I post a quote, but it has nothing. They're set like months in advance. It has nothing to do with my general mindset that day I've got.
You're posting quotes with no meaning for your followers. That's that's really what I do. It's who I am.
But then Michelle and Jesse are planning out their Capri themed dinner party that we hosted at an eighteen point five million dollar home. They're listing.
Is it Capri or Capri?
I've always said Capri, but I think it's Capri Capri Capri.
Is that a sophisticated way to say it? Because it's a sophisticated party. Yeah, it's very sophisticated, very sophisticated. That's why we say Capri Capri. I've never been to Capri Capri. If you're from Ohio and you're not sophisticated, you say Capri.
Have you got to Capri? And then how are you going to go to Pasitano? But everyone arrives at this pre Capri capriy themed dinner party and luc is hoping for peace. It's not happening, Luke, There's never going to be peace, Luke, Hello, come on. Kristen apologizes to Michelle and ask to speak with her later. Michelle doesn't seem interested at the moment. Now that Michelle's speaking, I like her a lot more. I do too.
I didn't know that she had a voice for the first what is it the first couple episodes, but now she does good for her Yeah.
I thought she was like Ariel when Ursula stole her little voice, thing like, but then all of a sudden she hadn't. I like it. I'm interested in what she has to say. I think the reason she wasn't talking is because whatever she has to say is going to be that she hates her husband.
Yeah, so she just chows to take the fifth in life in general, She's afraid if someone says, how is your day going, instead of being like great, she'll be like I hate him, So she just says nothing.
Janet wasn't at the girls' night, so she doesn't know exactly what happened. I mean, there's a lot of stuff, but I think the thing that is lingering on is that they're completely ignoring the initial accusation that Michelle said, don't say gay was protecting the children, And I'm confused why this isn't the.
Crux of the conversation. That's what I didn't understand either, because I feel like that's where it all started, but no one went back to that, so.
I don't know.
I have a hard time understanding exactly what was said and the timeline and who said what all I know is Kristen's getting beat up at all she did was repeat something.
And also I'm not saying Michelle is anything that she's being accused of. She's dealt with her own shit. I mean, she married Jessee, she went for it. Yeah, and she's getting her punishment, whether whether or not it happened.
Her life is a daily punishment. But I do think that Jesse did his homework.
Because bringing up the reason that Kristin was fired from reality TV, Yeah, I was like he knew what he was doing. Yeah he did.
He was like, Jacks move over, Yeah, hold by Persecco, what is the jacket?
Hold my Picasso jacket? Yeah?
And my apall spars.
Lease.
I'm about to put this up.
Kristin. It was nice knowing you, but I'm going to end this situation, even though I'm the biggest douche lord on television. Apparently. Either way, then it ends on it to be continued and we get into The Valley Season one, episode four. All right, now we are back to talk about episode four of the Valley. We're back at Michelle and Jesse's party. Kristen tries to tell Michelle that she protects her, but everyone makes fun of that statement, which we know now by seeing the trailer, Kristen knows something that she hasn't shared yet, which is clearly what she's alluding to. But I have to say, judging by Zach's pikachuw face, he may be guilty of.
Sturing the pot heiku chew?
Is that what you said? I also wonder how Jax is the one who attempts to be the voice of reason on this show.
Well, I also want to know how during this dinner party that how is Jack's not involved in all of this drama, Like there is a dinner party with just things being hurled everywhere back and forth, and none of it had to do with Jacks or anything he said or did.
Because I think that Jacks may not always make the right choices clearly, but I think he knows that he was also canceled once and he's not.
Like, I'm not even He's like, I'm not saying shit. I am not saying shit on this. I'm gonna let my boy Jesse do the dirty work.
Yep, I am out of.
It, Like I just.
He's like, if anyone needs depants, I'm here. I am that guy, but I'm not getting involved in this.
If anyone wants to talk about not wanting to have sex with their wife, I'll chime in.
But that's really where I stand here.
Then we but also like the transition from like this kind of drama to then them being with their kids. It's also hard for me to like process like I'm like, I'm like Joe trying to process stuff, like I'm like, what is happening? Because then we were with Cruise a speech therapist. Yeah, which like kind of that every parent can relate to that.
I know, I I that stuff like that makes me sad because I know, as a parent, if your child isn't developing as quickly or they're a little different, or you know, I have twin boys, so I get it. One is like really great at math, the other one isn't. I worry about the one that isn't. So I totally understand.
And you can't help, but like there is always going to be that portion of like comparison, and especially I would say for your first child, you're even.
More aware of hyper aware.
You're hyper aware, Yeah, like you're hyper aware to anything because it's your first.
Then the third one comes along and you're I'm like, whatever does i'd still it's the bed and have some her She kisses for dinner.
Fine, Oh you don't want dinner, you want a food by the foot, Go for it. Eat ten.
Take him to bed with you. You should keep him in your room. Oh you want to?
Oh you want to bring your iPad to your room to watch it all night? No problem, don't care. I'll still be in at seven point thirty to wake you up for school.
You know what, brushing your teeth is option at all.
Listen, you brush your teeth in the morning, so you're good. Yeah. Then Kristin once again texting Michelle saying her secrets are safe.
What does that mean? I mean, have you ever texted someone and said your secrets are safe with me? And then Michelle reads it?
So I don't know.
If I actually had a secret, I wouldn't share the text message.
I don't know.
I just don't understand the whole secret safe with me thing.
I think Michelle read it because she clearly knows that her her secret is not safe with Kristin. Well, clearly not. But this but that's not the secret. The secret is still coming. Right, But we've we we as viewers already know the secret and that's that she hates her husband, that she's a Republican.
She's a I is the president.
I hate Jesse club.
They're like, yeah, I mean she.
Just hates him. She hates his gut gut, not just his one gut, his one gut. Yeah, but they kind of It's this episode, I feel like, is just more of the same thing over and over. More.
It's more of the same conversation going round and around that we don't know exactly who said what, but clearly we'll get to a finale with this conversation at some point.
Yeah, I feel like we're going to get through it and we're going to ruin a marriage soon, so then we're going to have wrapped right through whatever Janet did in this game of telephone, which Nia told us, guys, this is a game of telephone.
No shit, Nia, Welcome to reality TV.
Nia.
I'm not sure where you've been the last four episodes, but this is what reality TV is built on. But also.
Getting back to the kids stuff, because they all go that now they're taking the kids to the fair. There's a lot of fair content here. There is a lot of I was like, are there are always as many fairs? I actually like the guys taking the kids to the fairer. I like that.
I even like how they film it and slow o, like they're like walking through the fair with their sunglasses on, like pushing their strollers. Yeah, it would be cool.
Felt like a scene from the Hangover. But they actually have real kids with them, right? But is there something that biologically interferes with a man's ability to put a car seat into a car? Kristin and Luke are on a day conveniently at a place next to Sir. Kristin thinks her friends feel threatened that she is a hot thirty two year old boyfriend with a big penis and a Hi labino.
And Rosie red cheeks. That's how I would describe Luke Colorado.
I like that she's into her boyfriend. That's great, that's great news because it could be the father for children. But what I am confused about is when Brittany and Danny are at Kristen and Luke's apartment setting up a romantic night for the two of them. I thought it was going to be a proposal. What's happening in there? Well, I really I don't know if I knawed off or what happened, But like, it's.
Just a massage table in roses. But why, I don't know. Is luc a massage therapist?
No, I don't know.
I couldn't grasp why this was happening. And then and then I don't know. Something happened with the dog, Jill, like the big German shepherd. I think she ate some of the roses, and then shit everywhere is the way.
That's why?
Then well that's why. Then Luke couldn't come to the party.
Because he was cleaning up dog shit. Yeah, they Kristen said, it's because the dog has diarrhea, and I'm like, probably because he ate the like massage.
Oil or or all the candles or the massage table like that.
Who needs a massage table if no, Like, bring in a sex chair if you want, But why are you bringing in a massage table if you're not a massage therapist. I don't get. I cannot understand. I think it was solely a reason to show that other people were making an effort that Brittany had to participate in. When Jacks refuses to make an effort with Brittany, that's my guest.
And he stares at other people's boobs and openly talks about how he's not trying to his wife. When do you do you think? I don't know, I don't I think when do we think the last time.
That Jack's made Britney feel special or sexy or.
I don't know, I have no idea. It's been a long time.
Yeah. Then they're in the gala, Michelle walks in, I've never I don't know that I've seen a hotter female on reality television anytime recently.
And Jesse looks a hot, freaking mess. He looks like a jockey.
Now, a jockey would be a step up, like it would make it. I don't even understand. And then he's like he looks at all the other guys and he's like, this is a real coat, but also dinner jacket. This is a real dinner jacket. But I didn't really understand what Danny was talking about either. When he was like, I don't want to overshadow everybody with my look, I'm like, you're wearing a black suit.
Was he being facetious?
I don't think so. I think it's because he chose to wear a tie.
But where does one get a jacket like that?
I don't know. Maybe we should ask Ryan from Orange County, because I feel like he would have worn it.
Well, I don't know, because I feel like Jesse's jacket he was expensive. Yeah, So even though it was not a great look and he reminded me of a jockey, I still figure it was something bougie and expensive.
Yeah, I do think it was an expensive coat. Even though it was a mistake, it was expensive.
It was an expensive mistake.
It was like their marriage. Then Michelle tells the story. We kind of already got through this booty call stuff, but we get into another conversation where they all decide to walk outside. Kristin and Michelle and Jesse and Zach. They have a conversation, conversation. Luke's not there because he's cleaning up dog shit. I think Kristin may have been too drunk to have this conversation at this point in time.
Yeah, I didn't really understand. Well, first of all, I didn't understand why Jesse got so heated and had to go back inside and just you know, bang around inside by himself.
He he just went into like, tell production, I need another skinny mark or approll sprits or whatever it is that he wanted.
Yeah, and he just kind of huffs and puffs around and then he comes back.
Out and then they finish it up and then it's coming up on the valley. Michelle tells everyone she doesn't poop in front of Jesse, and Nia realizes she may have high functioning postpartum depression, which if I mean, at this point, I can't even imagine what she's going through with so many little kids filming and reality television like that's.
Twins is a whole nother game. And then she's, yeah, I've been in that position. Annabelle was two twenty four months old too when I had twins, so I had three that were two and under, so I don't even remember that time period. It was a blur, That's what I was going to say, Like.
I I can't really even imagine. And also I want you to think about where your life was at that point in time, Like were you living in like an apartment and like hustling, Like.
I was living in this big, large house I have right now, and I wasn't working, but I was not filming a TV show, So I know what it's like to film a TV show.
So if you add the.
TV show that, I know what that's like. To newborn twins plus a two year old. I don't know how she does it, and I think that's why she's not She's not like a main character. She just doesn't have the energy for it. She doesn't have main character energy because she's trying to survive, and I think she will. I think once she gets through like this.
I think having a babysitter come for your like small little children while you go to film and fight feels very different than like.
When they're toddlers. Then you feel much more comfortable straight. Yeah, I mean my children are older now, so I'm fine with it. Yeah, they're fine. They can understand these kind of conversations.
But I do need to know. Do you poop in front of Shane? No?
Never, And that's not because of me, that's because of Shane. He is like he likes a division between anything that has to do with the bathroom. He doesn't even like it when I pee with the door open, he gets really upset and he comes up and he shuts the door.
But do you have two toilets in your bathroom or do you go to a different one?
No, So we have a large main bathroom in the primary bedroom. And like he has his sink over here and mine's over here.
But then there's one.
Toilet, but it's in closed, like it's in its own room. It's not just like in the bedroom.
Does ultimately poop on the same toilet that your husband's does?
It does, but he just doesn't want to know about it. Hear it, see it, smell it like nothing ever.
See now I kind of wonder about me and I don't we talk about it.
I don't know, do you think it enhances your relationship or it's detrimental it doesn't.
We kind of like we kind of just I'll be like want either one of us will be like it's not going to be a great morning, I didn't get to go, or you know, like it's just a part of our life. But I've always talked about poop.
Always like how detailed are you? Like, man, that was a big one. You should have seen that one.
No, No, Like Dove will be like, mom, did you see it was a banana size? And I'm like, Dove, that's too much information. But like ever in my entire family, like my sister or my brothers, that whole portion of my family will be like are we going to I gotta go do my favorite thing.
And that's just like Commo's keyword.
I did a tough Munner run this weekend, and guys, up until the day I did it, I thought about backing out, but you know why I didn't accountability because I had others from my all in by Teddy community pushing me, supporting me, and ultimately completing the race with me. That is the power of what all in can do and what I know we can do for you. So if you're stuck, if you are afraid, if you don't know how to get your health and wellness on a path forward, we can help. And if you use code popping off popp I n g off, I am giving you fifty dollars off any program. So, whether it's strength training or weight loss, head to all invite Teddy dot com and use code popping off and let's get you and your goals in check. Let's get into vanderpum Villa Season one, episode two, recap and three. I had to get Matt and George to send me pictures of everybody so that I can remember everyone's name.
Oh so you have like que cards, I don't. I'm just gonna I'll just do the best I can Oh, I'm just gonna I'm just gonna wing it.
Because I didn't do this first episode pod with you. I need to know who you think is likable from this show. Who do I think is well, it depends on which episode we're at now. Just in general, this is a blanket statement.
Well, there's only a few that I actually like stick out in my mind so far. I mean, I like Telly a lot. I think she's very likable even when she's crazy, because she brings it back down and she's reasonable. And what's the one, the blonde Hannah? I like Hannah. Hannah's a lot. She's very extra, but I like her. And I like Priscilla. She's Brazilian.
I like her.
She's like the one with the spread eagle one.
Oh yeah, Well, they have their little like queue cards and this is what they say. Hannah says, serves the seduction, Marciano says, delivers the drama.
Eric, who just saw his police report.
Manages the chaos. Kelly shakes up trouble, Andre wars on the charm. Grace airs the dirty laundry. I want to know how Grace and Emily. Grace and Emily are.
The housekeepers and Grace is the youngest one, right, and her dad's a pastor.
And then she cries about the makeup. Yeah yeah, Priscilla dishes the dirt. Gabriella, who I like, I think she's likable, gets the party started. Anthony the chef, who I was sure was like my age, and then they panned up his age and he was very young.
I was like twenty five.
He turns up the heat and then Caroline stirs the pot, and then Steven spices up the swore as that's a swore, a sore as.
That's another sophisticated word. It's above you know, it's I mean, I don't know, it's another way to say party.
I don't even know that we need to fully break down all of these episodes because there's two first question, do you like it? I do like it.
It's still like the Valley better Yeah, I don't know, Like I feel like it's just the Saint. It's going to be the same formula every time, but maybe not.
I don't know. I know, I wonder until other people start hooking up other than Marciano and Hannah, I wonder how we're going to move forward, Like just being concerned on which girls cross their legs and which they don't. I have to say, I do not think that.
As a Priscilla. I don't think her legs were spread eagle. They weren't as she her knees were open, but I felt like hers were crossed, but her knees were open. But I feel like the camera, did you see the camera like they were making sure that they were showing Marciana like looking down.
But I don't even know, Like I don't know, but I mean even at the dinner where when Telly pushed Marciano, Gabrielle goes into like calm them down, and it's all about the guests having this nice dinner. It's a lot of like chaos about movement when ultimately it's three locations. You're either on the lawn, you're at the bar, or you're on the gravel. Like it's not brain surgery here. I'm pretty sure you're going to be in one of those three spots.
And how many times has Lisa said don't drink and they just all drink?
Well, they all, but also do they not realize they're being recorded? I really Oh there's the ballroom too, sorry the ballroom.
Yeah, there's another location. There are four.
Which group of couples have you I mean, which group to enter the villa? Do you like the most? As in the guests?
Yeah, well I don't know the first couple that did this price proposal. I don't really feel like you got to know them very well. That's the thing I feel like.
Well, also, I recognized one of the guys who's done my hair before, which gave me some many flags, Like I was like, how how organic is this show? Because you used to be Laura Righetti's assistant and now you're the guest to Vanderfump Villa.
Oh was he one of the guests that was with the couple that was getting engaged? Yesh? Was he her hair guy? I don't know.
I texted Laura and I said, I don't know if I'm losing my mind or not, but like, is your old assistant on Vanner Pump Villain. She's like, I haven't watched it yet.
But yes, But I was like, looks lack sound.
But he didn't say.
Any words, but I was like, it's all fun. Note when in the next episode where Harlan gets her hair done for her Butterfly ball and Patrick's doing her hair, that's who did Gina's hair makeup for our first reunion Season thirteen of Real Housewives of Orange County. That was not the air that she got the heat about that Hobly was, Oh shit, hold on is this Patrick that did that? Does Lisa's hair well?
He always uses a bumpet. I love him, but I've seen that bumpet so many times. He plugs it right in and ya. I'm like, no, no, I do they go on these outings. They wear matching outfits. Each day is a new matching outfit. If I wore that purple tight like her shirt, the boy that I would be pitting out would be unbelievable.
I like the little cute dresses, though I do too. I mean waitressy dresses. Those are fun.
I think that that I mean, I think there's parts that are really fun. Marciano trying to become Jack's Taylor is not sitting well with me.
You think he's trying too hard, Like you think he's just acting like he's not being himself. He's just trying to be the number one guy in the group. I think he's trying to be the number one guy in the group.
If he's not.
And Hannah is really in love with that guy.
I really want to have a conversation with Hannah and be like, please explain it to me, like he is the worst.
But now, but then she has proven that she is also the worst, so maybe it makes sense. It could make sense.
I want to know. I do love how Lisa like pops in and then she's like, you know what, I'm so busy running my other businesses. I have to come and go. So it's why I have to leave Eric thunder thunder Underpants.
Eric Thunderpants will be in charge.
Well, I think between Eric Thunderpants, who really has no style with planning or doing anything, and Marciano wanting to be Jack's but missing insight and even a sense of humor, it doesn't bode well for him.
No, well, here's my question about Eric Thunderpants. The entire episode, this last episode, all he talks about is how he has to do everyone's job. But what is it that he's doing that is actually everyone's job? Other than complaining that he's doing everyone's job? But do you think I mean agreed? But also do you think he's talking to himself or he's talking to production. I don't know who he's talking to, but he says it multiple times.
And also, do you think that Priscilla regrets that episode one she wanted to make out with him in the pool.
I definitely think so. She was, like I called that one wrong about Night one.
First impressions can be very wrong, exactly, Lisa, you know, having the conversations with Kelly and trying to really invest in the relationships, Like I do like some of it, but I also am like, I'm trying to remember the last trip that I went on where I hung out with like, where all all the people working at the house or the event or whatever it may be, hung out with the guest the entire time. It just doesn't happen.
No, it doesn't happen. But I this is the part I don't understand is that the formula of this show. Every time there's new guests that check in, there's like four guests, and then the staff hangs out with them the whole time.
And then I think there's gonna be makeouts with the guests as my guest, because there's not enough of them that seem that they could be interesting. I mean, I feel like the pastor's daughter is going to have a little bit of an issue because something's gonna happen. Then there's the other girl that's currently the housekeeper that wants to take Telly's job, So we're going to deal with that. There's to be some hierarchy type things, right, But I don't really know what else we're going to get. I mean, the only current relationship. I mean, I didn't personally care that the chef burnt her croissant because she forgot about it.
Yeah, and I didn't understand why Marciano got so mad about it and refused to help her take the croissant out of the oven. Like.
Also, it wasn't like she didn't have the recipe to make something. She just forgot something was in the upstairs staff oven.
Right, But I did think it was very mature that he put it in her bed. But also, why is he so offended by that.
The amount of times that I've burnt popcorn and everyone in my house just has to deal with me forgetting about it.
Oh, I guess it's because we don't know that because we all know you're not a chef.
Oh okay, So, but if I was a chef, if I accidentally forgot something and made a mistake with something like heating up a croissant or popping popcorn, you'd be offended.
No, yeah, not at all me neither. I might put it in your bed, though, I would do that. I mean, I'm just gonna be honest.
Do you think that at the end of this season we're gonna see Hannah and Marciano together or shit's gonna get really bad?
Well, if we see them together, the question is how long will it last before he screws somebody else?
Well, we already know and like scenes to come that he's gonna hook up with a guest. Oh yeah, absolutely, And why is he the only one that's gonna hook up with a guest?
What do you think is gonna happen with Andre? Because he's really nice? I think he's so sweet he deserves some nice girl like.
But he already said Priscilla is not his type. And then the other chick, the pastor's daughter, she's into him too. I feel like there's gonna be some.
I actually I actually cried a little bit when Andre talked about how he didn't have parents. I actually got a little teary eyed. I think I missed that part. What does that say about us? I didn't miss it.
I cried.
I know now I'm trying to remember when he went in Lisa's office because they filled out the guest card yes, yes, yes, and the guest said they liked Tally and Andre, and then Tally left and she and he started crying, and she's like, why are you so upset? And He's like, because I don't really have like parents to share that with.
And I felt I felt I felt that, yeah, and he said like I was.
I always want like the approval of others.
In the fact that I was chosen as the first pick, yes, I did feel emotional about that, but I didn't necessarily feel emotional about the fact that the relationships on Vanner Frump, Villa Mate, the Valley relationship seem aspirational.
Well, there's really no relationships so far other than Marciano and Hannah, So that's the basis for relationships on this show. Yeah.
I mean at the end of the third episode that we're recapping, Eric is talking to himself again. I wonder if he's you know, we've talked about it to production, or is he drinking or is he batshit crazy. I also want to know, like how this casting process works, because you have to remember they're all going to like a remote look, not a remote location, but they're all going to a location they're not in their setting of where they live.
So is this just it seems like there was a casting call in.
Vegas, right, That's what I was saying. But is Eric Thunderpants from Vegas?
He's like from Missouri or something.
I don't know. But the drama between Eric and Steven don't care, don't don't We can keep talking about it. I'm not worried about it, to be honest, I don't care if the table's on the gravel, the patio, the ballroom, none of that shit matters to me. But I also don't like plan parties. You do that well, I don't so like for me, I'm like.
Yeah, but I don't see. I don't understand. Why do you feel like Eric as a house as a manager, the chateau manager. I feel like the best way to get respect from your employees is by earning respect, and I don't think he acts like that. I think he demands respect, which makes everyone repelled by him.
I think he's like trying to pretend that he's Matthew McConaughey and he's not.
I also wonder if if there is a memo or something went around that said that they could only button their shirts up two but not three. Yeah, it's three buttons up way too much. No, like you have to see the man cleavage in order.
To work at Vanner from Villa.
I feel like that was probably the only criteria. Please put this shirt on and only button the first two buttons. Okay, you're hired.
I also want to know why everybody on this cast has an aversion to drinking from a glass. Like they're all drinking from a bottle all the time, whether it's wine booze, like they're just pouring it into their mouth. Even the episode one where Priscilla and Thunderpants are like, you know, having their swim, they're drinking wine from the bottle, and then the other ones are drinking like the other, like the bartenders and everybody else. They're taking shots from the bottle and like, are we.
What's wrong with cups? I guess because they're not to be doing it. So if you actually pour in a cup, that takes longer and.
Then there's a trusted Yeah, I guess that's a good idea. We'll decide if we're going to keep watching Vanner Pump Villa so far. I'm I liked it more before I heard from others how much they disliked it, because I just am fair weather like that.
You're just easily persuaded.
Yeah, I can't help but like that.
Yeah yeah, So should we continue to recap it or should we just stick to the Valley and making fun of Jesse?
Yeah, I mean the Valley and Vanner Pump rules. Do we stick with that or do we do we need to delve in to Vanner pump Villa further, That is the question. Let us know. Thanks you guys, Thank you
