This is Teddy Teapod. Hi, guys, welcome to this week's Teddy Teapod, who I am co hosting with Bob Guinney. Most of you who know me at all know that I'm like a crazed Bachelor fan, like from the very beginning, and I couldn't think of sharing all of my personal information with anybody other than you because you were one of my favorites than so many incredible things post Bachelor, but I figured, you know what, I'm so grateful to have you here today because you know you've been through this reality world business back in then you know those of it. Well, thank first of all, thanks for having me. I really appreciate it. I'm excited to be on and uh yeah, you know if they if they were watching the show that far back, you were probably still in diaper. So I appreciate it how you're able to No, so white year were you on was in n No what? Oh my god, you actually just made me feel older than I am. No, it was two thousand and three, as on trist this season and then so it was the first bachelotte and then they made me the bachelor, so I was actually the fourth bachelor, and I was in two thousand and four, Okay, so I knew it was close to when I originally moved out. So I moved to California nine and we would have like viewing parties in my like little apartment that I shared with like eighties six other people. That has stuck with us. This will be the first year that I can't have my Bachelor viewing parties because of COVID. I know, man, COVID thing is just killing so many fun things. You know, it's just not the same one zoom, But at least this call, it feels the same. It feels like we're sitting in the same room together. It does. And so you know, I wanted to tell you. So my wife, who you've not met, um uh, we just moved from Seattle back to the Midwest, and my wife her best friend, uh, a lady in Cherish, is in Seattle, and so they would watch every episode of Real Housewives and they are the Teddy and Kyle relationship up there. And it was so funny because they'd always be like, I call my wife Kenyon, which is her maiden name, but Kanyon. I was always like, you know, he can Kanyon, you know what's going on? There, She's like, well everyone's just Teddy and Kyle and us yet again, So I'll just kiss uh. And so is she the teddy? She's the teddy. Yeah, and her friend cherishes the coum. Is she a little bit type A controlling, funny though loving way, Yes, yes she is. Actually, when we were getting married, I called her the Frugal Fiance because she I was like, you should have your own like pod series and it called the Frugal Fiance And she's like, what do you I go, Well, everything that comes up, You're like, wait a minute, I can go get that at Costco and make it myself. Now that's not a teddy thing. That's just a canyon to. But to give you an idea of her type A nous, it comes out. You know what, she's a girl after my own heart type AI till the end. But she's probably a straight shooter and that's you know why you fell in love with her, because it's it's it's a blessing and a curse for us straight shooter type A types. Yeah, this last week has been such craziness around here. Well I only imagine. I mean you're dealing with First of all, I said this last night in passing. But I know we have a lot of news to get to today, in particular what's going on with housewives and with you and uh and I mean, at the end of the day, it's just got to be such a I would imagine you said of blessing and a curse. I would imagine you're probably feeling a little bit of a blessing and a curse or a little bit of a relief, but also a little bit of like, you know, what the hell is going on here? I mean, so what is going on? The headlines are out right now about you know you. So the crazy thing, the craziest part about it was, I think it was last Monday. I woke up, I was on the Holton and my girlfriend started texting me my non television show girlfriends and they're like, hey, is everything cool? And I'm like why, and they're like, well, it's all over the Daily Mail that you're no longer a housewife. And I was like, oh, come on, you know, like whatever, you know, like you know, And then I went on Daily Mail and looked at it and then I like sent the message to my manager and agent publicist and I was like, hey, guys, what's up? And like maybe not three hours later, I get the phone call and they're like hey, and I'm like what and they're like, so, um, your contracts not getting renewed as a housewife, And I'm like, you are telling me that it's released to the Daily Mail before me, so that to me, you know, like you have to kind of go through a couple of different stages, which I'm sure you know, but like the first stage like your ego, like which we all hate to admit we have one, but it's like what what is happening? Like how did this happen? How did I have no idea? But then you start to kind of think about things and I started really like, of course my heart broke because I was like, how was I blindsided by this? How did this happen? And I wouldn't know, um, but I think for the last couple of months I had been preparing myself because we had like a really busy year last year with our family, Like I got pregnant naturally for the first time I had was able to tell the kids, like I filmed so many amazing things that were never shown on the show that I was like, it should have been the writing on the wall, you know, like, okay, all of the all the like things that make me a likable, redeeming human being, we're not shown on the season thing is the worst on the reality show, yeah, you know, And so if you only see a certain part of somebody, it's really hard to connect to them, I think. And I'm not blaming production or Bravo or whatever it is, but I was there too, you know, to do a certain part, and that part I did, but if you don't see the other part, it's hard to relate to the person. If you don't see me at work, if you don't see me with my kids, if you don't see me with my husband, and you just see me arguing, right, it's I mean to be fair. I mean you were you were a decent, like a kind arguer. I will say that like in the episodes that I've left, you were never like going for the juggler, which you know, you weren't really playing the game, so to speak. I guess in that regard where it's like scorees Earth and then you know that's how everyone stays getting renewed here here, right, they just don't really have h I think the biggest thing for me was like I always said, I was only gonna say things you know what, I can't stand when it comes to like listening to some few past housewives will come forward and they'll be like I was forced to do that or I was forced to that. We're not forced to do anything. We're adults. You make our own decisions. But I can say that, yes, I made mistakes throughout my time on Housewives, but I also I also did authentically what felt right to me in that moment. And yes, some things I had to apologize for and some things I still stand true to today. But I'm not going to be the type that you're gonna worried is like gonna punch somebody. Like everything I say comes from the heart. And maybe that's why you know you're not gonna see craziness from me, because like I'm doing it because it's how I'm feeling, not what I think. You know, Jennifer is going to think on blah blah blah watching it back. Sure, No, I get it, And that's if you If you were doing that, that's pretty transparent too, That's what they I say, right, you can see right down the lens. So if you were just putting on an act. Everyone would have been pissed about that. They would have been able to pick up on that and they would have been like, oh, she's totally acting this out. So you know, that's I think that people out there that love you are no. I know that you're a very genuine article and that's something that's important. You know, Thank you. I can imagine being the last to know had to just be so disheartened. I mean, well, I think, you know, there's also a big part of when something is such a huge part of your life for over three years and it takes you know, we're filming five six days a week with these same people, and it's not only just the other women that you film with, it's also the producers, the crew. Like you talk to these people more, almost more than you talk to anybody else in your life. So I remember and I still. I mean, I text, like I'm on a you know, a group text with Erica and Kyle and Renna, and like there are days where I'm like, why do I feel sad today? And They're like, You're gonna feel sad some days, like and then the next day you're not gonna feel sad, and then you're gonna feel sad, you know, like because it's a habit, it's something that created in your life, and like it really does feel like a breakup because like there're certain producers that I would talk to, you know, like I joked, but I joked with one of them. I was like, you're like my my second husband, or like you're like my sister wife. Like we talk so much that you know, it's always going to be different, even if I came back as a friend of or whatever happens, Like my life will forever be different. But in that same token, I feel like when I was all all in on Housewives, I was unable to do some things that I know I need to do in the rest of my life because the negativity and the positivity, all of those things consumes you. Oh yeah, for sure. Well you know you mentioned the friend of I mean, would you would you consider that, like if they came to do you and said, hey, we'd like you to come back, and you know, be kind of like a side a side player type of thing. You know. I think there's different types of friends. I think if if it came down into a situation where like it was to support one of my friends at an event, that I you know, I want to be there for and I care about. You know what, if it makes sense, then I you know, I'll never say never. But I wouldn't want to be in a situation just to like throw drama, you know, Like, yeah, so I never say never because I just don't know the circumstance. And some of these women I really love and care about. Yeah, well that's what I was thinking. I mean you just mentioned like Ranna and and Erica, I mean, and obviously Kyle. I mean those are real friends of yours now, like you guys, because and I mean I've met Na years ago. I've always loved her. You know, she's she's a wild card, but she's funny and crazy. But were there anyone else? Was there anyone else on the show that you feel like you walk away with a genuine friendship that will last, you know, while you're not on the show. You know, I reached out to dereit Um because deret and I've had some extreme highs and lows on the show. And I don't know if that's because the extra you know, just that extra pressure of like wanting to get your point of ross or whatever it may be. But I texted her as soon as I found out and just said, hey, I just wanted to let you know, like we've had good times and bad times on the show, but I want to let you know they're not renewing me as a housewife, and I just want to wish you the best, like regardless of I think that Derit has a good heart and our kids loved playing together. So I reached out to her, and then, like Sutton and I have message back and forth, but like I you know, I think that time will tell. Yeah, And I think it's crazy to put too much expectation on yourself or on other people, because also what starts to happen is you don't want the others to feel like like they can't share things with you or they need to share things with you, because this is a situation out of our control completely right. But I got ahead. I did hear from Andy, and you know what, Andy did something like I think it was on his podcast or on his serious um channel where he said that my post was the most like authentic departure post he had ever seen, because I was just straight for you know, every housewife, I think Prior always says, you know, it was a mutual decision to not go. And you know the biggest thing for me, I was like, I'm not gonna say that. Yeah, I'm not gonna say that. I'm not gonna do that because it's not true and if anything, I'd rather be honest. And then I got some heat because people are like, why did you turn off your commenting? Like why did you turn your commenting off on that post? If you're gonna be so authentic and be so honest, why are you turning off your commenting? And the truth is, sometimes you're okay, you're in a good mental state to take heat and to take the abuse or to take trolls, or to take people coming at your family. That wasn't the day for me now. And that's your choice to make too, you know. I I think about that, like I was. I was wondering, because I mean I used to when I was a pachelor. I remember I'd have like five nice things said about me in two bad things, and those two bad things would stick in my mind for like a month, you know, and I would second guess everything, and it was like these people don't realize you're a human being, you know, And so when you're going through something like that. I would imagine turning the comments off. You're like, look, I'm gonna be genuine and authentic, but I take it. I'm gonna take today off, you know which for me, I wanted to. I felt really good about the way that I shared it. It was like, I'm gonna be honest. I had. I think that was the second or third day after I found out, I was going in waves of crying and then laughing and then crying like I was. I didn't know how to reconcile my emotions, but I knew I had to be honest and I wanted to come forward and tell the truth because it was almost generating more hate by the speculation. I know they normally prefer to wait and do a big announcement at the end, but I was like, I, for me, I need, I need to say it because I needed to like put a stop to people speculating and I just want to kind of put it out there. But I also didn't want my emotion about you know, maybe grieving that the show's over or being excited for what's to come, to be affected by somebody else's opinions of me. Right, yeah, and there's gonna be you know, the hardest part about that is a lot of those people are fans and love you and support you, and then you'll have a few people who they don't dislike you. They just like to stir up the sauce, you know, for reaction, and they don't realize how I can really mess with you a little bit, you know, you know, And I think it just all comes with time. I mean when I first came to California when I was seventeen years old, I had these like big dreams, you know, like I was like, Okay, I want to be an actor, I want to be a singer. And I remember my first big rejection was the end for me, and I didn't do anything in regards to that world again for like fifteen years, Yeah, because like I didn't want to hear it. It hurt me too much and I didn't want to go back to that seventeen year old girl. Like I've done so much work myself to to grow and feel comfortable in my own skin and know who I am, and sometimes we revert back to old patterns when like things happen to us that are out of our control and I just I don't want to do this. It's not fair to me. It's not fair to my kids, right, I was gonna say that. See, I mean, how do you I mean, obviously you've had this discussion with your family, So how are they reacting to? Like what's your husband think? What does you know? What does everybody think? Um? My husband's like listen, I think I he's like I wish everybody got to see the amazing things about like like your first season, people got to see a lot of who you are, Like you're silly, you make fun of yourself, you don't take yourself too seriously, but like you're also such an amazing mom. Like we had a moment where and I remember saying to production, like I'd rather not film this because this is a really important thing for us. It was the day we told our kids that we were pregnant. We made this book and we read it and like it was like we are you know, this whole thing and and they were like, no, no, Teddy, we'll do it. It'll be in there. And like I thought that would be a memory that we would have forever, and it wasn't in there, you know. So it's like some of those things like gosh, you're like why did I why did I share that side of me? Or like things were asked about growing up and I'm like, why did I share that? You know, you put yourself on the table for not to be shown. But he was like, here's the beauty of it, Teddy, Like you came on. The people that watched the show and relate to they still love you. They still, you know, are motivated by what you're doing or inspired by what you're doing or how you've changed your life. Your business is in a good, healthy place, your kids are happy, like we're we're still married, you know, like all all of the things that can happen when you really put your life out there, Like it didn't happen. We we came out unscathed. I came out with some good friends. I just moved into a beautiful new house. Like you know, life is not I'm not in it's such a place. But you know, there's definitely Oh. But the only person that was really pissed was my son Cruz. He goes, Mom, what did you do? And I said, you know, I don't really know that I did anything, and he goes, I wanted to be famous. Now what You're like, we can work on that. You're gonna have to figure that out on yourself, buddy. Yeah, that's really fun. How are the kids? I mean, I know they're all going through a little you know what, I don't one of them had a little hand issue and the neurosurgery and everything. Are you okay to talk about that? Like? How how's everyone doing? Everybody's doing good. Um my daughter dev who had neurosurgery, she gets her helmet on Friday or her doc band and she's looking good, she's happy, she's you wouldn't have known that she's had neurosurgery. Uh. And then Slay and Cruise. I mean, they're doing as good as they possibly can be. Doing school at home. You know, there's highs and lows with that because they want to bet all their friends. And luckily we found a huge outlet which has been we've all been riding again. So we got to the barn and ride horses and like that's a safe, you know, sport for us to do. Yeah. Then, um, Luckily, because of everything that's going on and because they can do virtual school, my dad was like, hey, do you want to come visit us? And he's like, you know, we're figuring out a safe way to go visit my mom and my dad and my sister, so everybody can meet baby Dov and the kids, because it's been you know, my dad met baby Dov, but my mom and my sister haven't because you know, she's a pandemic baby. Right. Yeah, that's It's such a weird time for everything, isn't it. Yeah. You know, I I was gonna tell you I have the coolest memory of your dad. Uh. I was five years old and we just signed a record deal and I was playing the Bluebird in Bloomington's. I've been there. Yeah, Kenny Arnolf was playing with a band. They're like just having fun and playing and we were like the opener for his band, and your dad came out and got on stage and just started singing with his with case, you know, and I just sat there and oh my god. We closed the place down and we just hung out. And I mean, I'd be lying if I said I had like this great heart to heart with your dad, which I didn't, but I was in the same room with him, and I'm such a fan that it was just so cool to get there and his hang with him and his you know, he was telling stories and just being just you know, really just like a cool dude to be around. And Kenney are Enough was so like gracious to us, and you know, it's like one of those moments that you it sticks with you the rest of your life, you know, And so I wanted to share that way because it made a huge difference for me when I when I'm not in that night. Oh, I love that story, And I mean that's that's really who he is. And I think that's taught me a lot as well as like he's somebody who just really loves what he does. Yeah, and he doesn't for him and for you know, like he creates music that he loves, that he cares about. He paints because it's something he loves doing. And I think that that's been a big lesson for me, and in regards to doing the show and also having all in and also having my kids, Like the importance has got to remain on what do I love doing? What do I wake up in the morning and crave doing. And that's helping people, and that's working on myself. That's making sure that my family is taking care of themselves and having fun and we are doing things together and that I'm present and you know, like truthfully. Like my dad was like, listen, Teddy, when one door closes, another opens, as long as you keep showing up for yourself every day. And that's the truth. Like I've had paparazzi stalking me every day since it happened. They've got some real flattering shots, let me tell you. But like they stocked me on my runs because I think they're waiting for me to like be having this crying breakdown, you know what. I might have to them sometimes, but it's not gonna be outside on my run, all right. That's like, I guys, it's not gonna happen here. I do that in the bathtub when no one's I'm watching with a with a giant magnum of blind with my huge apperall sprints, and you're just pretending I'm having self care. Yeah, that's right. Accountability is your thing. So it's importantly you're accountable for how much wine you're drinking on on one of those nights too. You gotta, you know, keep your hands. I'm definitely accountable the next morning. Well, I think it's true too. It's like, you know, the adversity happens, right, I meanies been a garbage year for so I mean for all of us, so many people, you know, with COVID and everything, and it's been just awful. The debates were awful. If anybody watched it, you know, it's like it's like, you know, there's no there's no sense of calm and so much change happening. So it's like, you know, of course this happened this year, and it's just all the times is what happened. Of course it happened this year. But it does give you a chance to to really take the notoriety and the and the the you know, the name recognition and everything you got from the show and turn it into something great. I mean, I know it's I know it's quick, but if you already started kind of thinking about next steps or are you just sort of sitting back and you know, I think the biggest thing has been my My biggest focus has been like, all right, I'm really leaning in too, and I leaning in a such an over your work to stop leaning in. But I've really been focusing on like the morale of all of my employees and focusing on my clients and the things that I did prior to Housewives, because you know, when I when I'm filming Housewives. I can only keep on so many personal clients myself, so now I'm starting to grow that number again. I'm starting to also go back to the things that I love that have nothing to do with the television show, like going out to the barn riding horses, like making time to talk to the people in my life that are really important that I do love, you know that when you're busy and then they're like, Rush, how you doing? You know, like even my sister, like rush conversations were like she's one of my very best friends. I love her so much. Like I need to take that time to, you know, invest in those relationships that maybe I haven't been putting enough effort into. And also like watching the show back, there are some things that I've learned, you know, about myself that I want to work on, and like I'm glad that I, you know, was able to watch this season back and go, Okay, you know, this was an ideal this was an ideal rom and then also remember the good parts, but then go okay, in the future, yes, Teddy, you can still be straightforward. Yes you can say what's on your heart. Maybe your tone could been a little different, maybe you could you know, like that's part of you. Like my my version of Teddy here at home. I'm always like, it's not what you say, it's how you say it. I said, it's my wife all like you sound bad. She's like, it's just my voice, you know, Like you know, sometimes my intensity level is a little hot, you know. So and like the season before that, I've learned like gosh, I'm really nagging my husband a lot, you know, like or whatever. It made so just able to kind of take those things and say, like all right, I can grow and learn from this, and the friendships that matter from the show will continue on. Yeah, that doesn't end just because the contract then, you know. And to that point, like I mean you said you reached out to Dry, I mean, what what did Kyle say? Like, I mean, I know you guys are so close. What how does she read? I mean, I think there's always this moment. There's this thing that like we always kind of everybody knows that, like sometime after the reunion is when you get your pickup letters, right, so everybody just it's like that unknown thing that you don't really speak about. Yeah, that morning I got the text about the Daily Mail. I texted her and I was just like h and She's like no, and I was like, yeah, I think I think this is a yes, and she was like no, you know what. And then once she found out, it's like it all happens for a reason, like we love you. I can't imagine doing this without you. We love you, Like, but I I might even get emotional, so cheesy, but like, oh, but being able to create such an amazing friendship through reality television show, it's really unheard of. And my you know, I never would have thought, like when people are like our reality television shows fake, Like I never in my deepest like thoughts of doing Housewives sort of been gosh, I'm probably gonna find one of my very best friends doing this show. You wouldn't have guess that in a million years. Yeah, Like, and she has been a friend that's connected with my friends, Like we have integrated into each other's lives outside of the show. And it really is incredible that you can really form that strong of a relationship with cameras on you. It's amazing, isn't it. I mean, forget the cameras are there, right, and you're just being yourself, which I think is white people love you so much. But I think about that with Kyle te Like, I mean, you know, I watched the show as much as I could, and I would always I always like be to my wife and I was like, oh, you're watching that show again, then I do. I can't believe I would. Everyone makes fun of me for that, but I would say you brought out a different side of Kyle too, you know, Like, I mean, there's a side of Kyle that I think seemed a lot more relatable this past season in that, you know, she let her guard down a little bit. She's always kind of been, you know, battling out in the past with the ander pomp, you know, for the Queen Bee type of situation, and I think she's just you brought out a side of her that I think you really needed to see too, like a little more of a human side, you know. Well, I I think we really trust one another and it was a true authentic friendship. And I think that any show, whenever you're you know, watching a show, you can feel that and you can see that. And that's why I think at the beginning of the season, all the women were like, what's going on? What is this? What is it? And we're like, this is called an authentic friendship? You guys, what happens? I'm just kidding, idea. I actually I watched the finale again last night, the part three of the finale in UM. First of all, I love to pick hare and I was that was a nice touch. Um. But you know, Erica, You and Erica are like it seemingly very different people, but you guys seem to have like a nice understanding of one another. I thought, you know what, I love Erica and I. The thing that I learned so much is like Eric and I the first season didn't click. And the reason why it was we never did anything together the two of us. Every single thing was in the group. So how do you It's very hard to connect with a person in a large group when you don't get to know anything about that person and the only thing that you know about them is what's been told to you from somebody else, right, you know. So I got brought in and then you know, had these conversations with vander Pumper Dread or whomever we're having the current situation with her, and then I started feeling things that maybe I didn't necessary really feel or no, just because we never spoke, you know, it was other than hello, like there was no time for us to connect. And then once we both said, you know, at the reunion after my first season, like okay, you know, we're going to make a conscious effort to move forward and get to know each other. It was impossible not to like one another because like, she's a straight shooter, she's an you know, an honest person. I've said this before, but like if I were to get arrested tomorrow, Erica would be the person I would call because I know that she would never tell a soul, you know, like she is. She is that kind of that kind of person. And she's also funny and smart, and you know, I think it takes a big person for both of us to say, you know what, maybe we were wrong about each other that first season. I think it says a lot. Yeah, I mean, because it's hard to do. It's hard to look. I mean, well, you mentioned it a few times, you know, like looking back and watching the show, you decided maybe you were a little nagan too much, you know, maybe this or that. It's like it's hard to do that self evaluation because I know for me, I mean, god, I watched the first season on The Bachelorette back and saw my side profile, I'm like, Okay, I've got to do something. I'm not knocked cards and I'm doing some donkey kicks immediately. But that was just a visual thing, you know, and then you start realizing different things about yourself. But it's hard to do that because it's you know, you're doing it while still filming, are still in the public eye, and it's so good for you. I mean, I can't be easy. I mean, I think another big thing about the show is what I've learned is you have two options. You have the option to be the type of person that talks behind somebody's back and in their confessionals, or you have the option to always say it to somebody's face. And even though it was hard, it's hell for me to do it, I always chose to say it to somebody's face. Yeah, and you see that throughout all three of my seasons. Like, I mean, I was on the struggle bus trying to do it, and I mean, I said to myself, why do I say awkward so many times? Because anytime I'd have to do it, I'd like put my like man hands up and I'd be like, this is gonna be awkward, you know, but I had to go that route because the only way that sits well with me, you know, like and and that's the thing people do understand, like why would you say it to her face? Or why did you bring it up at a dinner because you think me saying it in a confessional behind her back and letting her find out six months later watching It's gonna be better. No, ma'am, that's gonna be a hot mess right there if you do that. I mean, you did the right thing. It's I couldn't imagine it being easy. Even last night when I rewatched uh the finale and you were like, you know, you say that you support women, but you didn't get on the plane and go, you know to Yeah. Yeah, it's one of those things where I was watching, I was like, oh wow, that's that took some that took some chance. Yeah that's nice. But I think, you know, for me, it wasn't like trying to get it at at Garcela. I mean, I like Garsela. I think garselves funny. I think she's a big personality. I think she's all those things. But I think that it's it's really challenging going through it and and always trying to say, like, you know, we all have to empower each other in every moment and this is who we are, and making these big accusation as women, but then not necessarily doing it or then kind of mocking the entire situation. We all know we're on a TV show. We all know that the TV show thrives on drama. So when you say things like that, you know that it's going to make other people look bad. You just it's you know, like you know clearly if you're like, wow, guys, why are you being so petty? You know what Real Housewives, Beverly Hills this, so like let's let's let's yeah, let's reel this. And it's not your first rodeo, so like that. That was mainly my point, like you can't say those kind of off the cuff comments if you're not gonna be there every single time, showing up to show some more, whether you're getting paid or not. That's right. That's another thing too. I mean, you come through this whole situation obviously a bunch of women. You almost become like a sisterhood, and there's certain friendships you have that you're gonna take away from it. But are there certain people that you're almost thankful that you aren't gonna have to see again? I mean, is it? I mean, I'm sure you'll still see them, You'll still be in certain circles. But are there certain people that you're glad you're not gonna have to, you know, sit at dinner with every night? You know what? I'm really excited not to be a part of Twitter. Oh yeah, Twitter, Like I want you to hold me accountable to this. Okay, So I'm gonna put it out there to all my Tea pod listeners and to you. I don't want to be the ex housewife that is tweeting on the show years after I have been on the show about other people's problems, right, I never want to be that person. I never want to be the person shading somebody years after. Like it has been something that has been crazy to me, Like Camille Grammar makes it her sole mission in life to try to put me down on Twitter, and I'm like, how does this even involve you? And what do you care? Like I just don't. That is my biggest goal, Like if I'm involved in something, if I do come back as a friend and it's something I'm involved in, Okay, that's fine. But if I am not on that show, I better not be commenting on Twitter. Yeah, like absolutely not, and especially if it's not and you know, and trying to be funny and when trying to be mean. Yeah, you know, I just don't. I don't want to become that. I don't want to be bitter. I don't want to be angry. I don't want to go after people that are on a show that I was once on, Like I just that negativity I am. I really want to be done with. Yeah. I think that's a smart movement. I mean, at the end of the day, it's like, you don't strike me as a type of person who's gonna be, you know, sitting there and like watching every episode and trying to figure out mean tweets. Like, you know, I may send a text to my girlfriends that are on the show and be like whoa hot mass express or like you really drunk? Or this really happened, you know, whatever happened. I may heckle them to their favorite But I really I think there's and I don't want Housewives to be something that defines me forever where I feel the need to justify things ten years later. Yeah, yeah, that's yeah. It's a it's a launching pad, right. I mean, it's a great opportunity for you to get out there and then obviously with all the other things you have going on in your life, it's it's it's not a bad thing that people know you as someone who is a straight shooter, who is going to lay their heart out there on the line and not be That was a big thing for me when I was the Bachelor guy too, or on the Best Route rather, I should say before the Bachelor, but I didn't want to be the guy in the I t m S. Was in the moment things with producers where I was like trashing the other guys. So I told them that because that was that was my That was like my badge of honor in my mind, because I'm like, I gotta go home after this, and the last thing I wanted my buddies just ragging on me because I'm super nice in this dude's face and then stabbing the them back, you know, when I'm not around them. So I think that that has always a nice thing that I've heard from other people that they respected from the show. So I I totally feel that and something that my um babysitter said to me. You know, after I found out about getting let go from the show, which I had totally kind of forgotten about. You know, you almost like black out the negatives when something happens, Like you're like, oh, I don't remember this side I said. I was like, gosh, you know, like I just can't believe this happened. Blah blah blah, and she goes, Teddy, I'm just so grateful this happened for you. And I said why and she goes, I remember so many nights throughout these last three years where you'd come home later than you wanted to come home, or whatever happened, and you'd be crying and you would be sad about what went down. And you know, even though I wasn't crying on the show, like, yes, I was sometimes believe me, everybody now it's called me or crying baby all you want, but I those car rides home from every single event, going through everything that may have happened to you or to your friend or between two friends, like it eats away at your soul, and like I would come home and I'd have tears in my eyes. You know, ripping off those fake eyelashes, like taking out my extensions. Like I say, my like driver that drove me to and from Housewives, and I'm like he was like my therapist. Like we'd sit in the car right home and I'd be like, I can't believe it's happened, and so and so I just feel sick, like and anxiety and like just consumes so much of your life. Sure, I mean some of those arguments are just I mean, I watched still and it's funny with my wife, She'll go, you know what, this relaxes me. I'm like, how does this relax you? Like it makes me insane, Like I'm like jumping out of my seat, like I'm you know, I was watching it. I can only imagine how it had to feel afterwards. And that's funny that you say that the drivers like a therapist, because that he's probably like, you know, he's probably the guy who really holds those where all the bodies are buried, so sure he knows the good like because if also there were times I was crying, There's also times I was pissed. You know, she's in the car, like I can't believe she at that I can't believe she said that to me. I can't you know whatever it maybe or like the drive home from this season when I cried. I think I only cried one time this season, which is a small miracle. On the way home, my husband's like, I had never seen it happen like any other time during Housewives. It wasn't like a group dinner, and I like broke down. So he was like casually eating a salad during it, and he's like, babe. And on the way home he's like, I can't believe you cried, Like why do you even care? Why would you even get upset? And my driver he goes edwin. Now it's not a good time. That's so funny. Now it's not a good time for her. She's processing. Let let it die down. She just had a dramatic experience. I know this, this is her process. She's gonna sit quiet, and then she'll start venting, and then she may cry again, give a few minutes. It's funny. I remind myself all the time. But like the things I'm supposed to do with my life's and at me and I'm like, okay, I probaish you just step away. Let her process and then come back in. So it's got to be hard when you're in those like pressure cooker moments. You know, it was funny, seem like this is totally off topic, but it's I've never seen anyone do it on any of the shows before until de Nice. But where like she, I think she just assumed that if she said certain things and that they wouldn't air it because it didn't seem like a TV show. I mean, she would tell her husband like, hey, stop, you know, stop saying stop seeing anything cameras on, you know, And the fact that they would leave that in I thought was kind of shrewd by Bravo, like a smart move by the producer. Well, this is the first year they broke the fourth wall in general, but it was because she kept breaking the fourth wall, so not that's not happening. Like we all know we're on camera. We don't need to like remind ourselves like so I think that's partially why. But also like even in the interviews they showed, like production talking to us asking interview questions and then us thinking about the answer, you know, like all of that. I actually thought it was good that they did that because I think sometimes it's hard to understand where we're coming from, or like you saw a producer talking to Garcella at the car one time, like they're just opening it up because oftentimes, you know, you are watching the show and you're like, how did that come up? You know, like how does this happen? And it's so many things stem from fourth wall stuff right now, Like and for those of you guys who don't know what fourth wall means, because I had no idea what fourth wall met my first season. When everyone's like, oh, that's for you know, you can't break the fourth wall or whatever it was, that is anything that makes what you're doing a TV show versus reality. So so when Denise would say Bravo, bravo, effing bravo, she was trying to break the fourth wall, which would mean that production stops what they're doing and then read does the scene. But the problem is we had never seen that. That wasn't something we were doing. So then that created a whole new issue with all of us. Yeah, no, no one was happy about it. You know, it was happy about it because we're all like, why can you do that? But we can. I would love to have done Bravo, Bravo, effing Bravo when I was crying at Kyle's dinner at the beginning of the season. But you signed up to do this, Yeah, yeah, exactly. It's your it's kind of your job right now, so you gotta stick with it and take the give in to that. Yeah. Yeah, that's interesting. I was wondering about that because I mean, I was thinking that to myself, Like we would do those I t M s where we would sit there and you know, and I'm not sure if this is how it works with the producers on on on the Housewives, but they would basically we would use what they would say to us in a question and we would repeat it back on camera to kind of give the context of what we were doing. So, for example, like if I was just not a group date, they'd say today I want a group date with Debbie, Brenda and Ronda, and I'd be like, today, I want a group date with DEBI, you know. And that's why I think they weren't amazing so much on The Bachelor, because the producers are like, today, today was just amazing. I wanted this great group date, and that's how I would start my sentence. You know, did did that ever play? In to those you would have on the show. The only time it happened was my first season when I I had I was upset about the situation with Erica that she wasn't agreeing with me, like even though she had already agreed with me, and I was venting to a producer and we had both like, I think that the pretend to amnesia comment, I don't know that that came from my own like I know that that was said and are venting back and forth. I just thow I came up with it because I did. I'm like, I don't know that I've ever thought like granted, I think maybe we were just like I was like, I can't believe she said that I remember this happening and we were walking up the stairs and I had the memory and they showed the memory later that did happened. But but I think the producer may have been like, I know, it's like pretend Amnizia. And then I remember three days later sitting down and being like, pretend Amnisia. And then I was like, Dann, why did I say that? You know, like, but it wasn't ever Teddy, you should say this. It's just talking to another human being. It's like if you hang out with somebody for a long time and they say the word y'all, all of a sudden you start saying y'all. It's not subliminally subliminally happening versus you know, you're being told to do something, not forcing the words down their mouth, but it's just out there in the atmosphere, and it's just in your head, you know, even even my you know, I got so much heat about talking with my hands, which you can see I do seven. I can't help it. My dad does it, and then my mom does it. She's Italian, like this is who we are. So I got so much heat about it that I tried for like a couple of episode, a couple of confessionals to sit on my hands. Like I was like, okay, I'm going to not use my hands in confessionals. This is my new thing. And I got a call and said, Teddy, I don't know what you've changed your confessionals, but you're like a zombie up there. You need because I couldn't. I don't know how to talk without my hands. So it's like if you try to change who you are, it just doesn't You can't do it. No, I totally agree. Well, I think it's gonna be huge for you. I think it's exciting. I know it. You know at the beginning, like you said, it had to suck the way it felt, and I think you're being so honest about it that it's going to really let people see, you know, why they fell in love with you in the first place. And so ultimately that's kind of the big big takeaway for me, you know, just getting to talk to you today on this, and I mean, I guess, like what what is I know you said what's next is like you're gonna focus on your business, focus on your family folks. On that are you're gonna take any time just for yourself and just kind of peel back, And you know, I think I kind of already have been. I think from that I let myself fully feel like more in the first couple of days. And then now for me, what makes me feel best is routine. Like I know it's working for my family. I know, like we get up, we have our morning breakfast, you know, we have that, like we put on music and then like I go for a walk or run and like I have to keep doing me And I know the ideas will keep coming. I know that the next steps will keep coming, and I know if I have a bad day, it will pass right. And like, that's that's how you have to be. If if you pretend that every day you're gonna wake up and feel happy or feel the same exact way you feel felt yesterday, you're gonna do damage. Yeah, especially during this time and everybody's life is like it's tough to wake up and even just put a smile on your face. So it's like to go through something like this on top of all this other bs and come out with a positive mental attitude, and especially because there's so many unhappy people on Instagram on social media right now, they're doing everything they can to try to, you know, hurt others. You know, I just keep trying to remember, like that's not who I want to be, right, That's gonna be my focus. And I think if we do that, then we're all gonna get through this. We're all in this together, and you know what good things are ahead. I can feel it. I can feel it too well. I love go today. Thanks for taking time with me and for letting me come on your show and hang out. Well, thank you so much. I hope to talk to you soon, and please tell your wife I said hello, and anytime she comes to l A and wants to hit up Home Goods or Costco, I'm her gal. Those are her two favorite spots, so I know she was. But thanks, Datty. I love talking to you man. Have a great rest of your day. Tell your family I said hello, and hopefully we'll get to hang out in l A sometime soon. Sounds good bye bye. Thanks for listening. Subscribe to to any Teapot on her radio or wherever you listen to podcasts.