Hey, guys, welcome back to Just Jackie and I have a really special guest today. So you know, guys, this limited pod is only six episodes, my solo pod, and I wanted to make sure that someone really special to me was invited on before this ends, because I feel like people got to know very little about my husband Evan on the show, and a lot of people were intrigued by him because he's sort of like an outlier. He didn't really get involved the way that other husbands get involved on the show. He stayed by my side but sort of on the sidelines as much as possible.

Hey, guys, welcome back to Just Jackie and I have a really special guest today. So you know, guys, this limited pod is only six episodes, my solo pod, and I wanted to make sure that someone really special to me was invited on before this ends, because I feel like people got to know very little about my husband Evan on the show, and a lot of people were intrigued by him because he's sort of like an outlier. He didn't really get involved the way that other husbands get involved on the show. He stayed by my side but sort of on the sidelines as much as possible.

And I know that people loved him. He really behaved very well. He's very smart.

And I know that people loved him. He really behaved very well. He's very smart.

He didn't get in the mud, but people did not get to really know him personally. And he's so smart and funny and he has such interesting takes on life, and I thought I'd love for everyone to get to know him a little bit better. So today's guest is my husband Evan. We're going to talk about everything from reality fame, to parenting, to social media, what it was like for him when I was sick, and the keys to a good life.

He didn't get in the mud, but people did not get to really know him personally. And he's so smart and funny and he has such interesting takes on life, and I thought I'd love for everyone to get to know him a little bit better. So today's guest is my husband Evan. We're going to talk about everything from reality fame, to parenting, to social media, what it was like for him when I was sick, and the keys to a good life.

So, without further ado, welcome Evan. Golschneider.

So, without further ado, welcome Evan. Golschneider.

Hi, Jackie, Hi.

Hi, Jackie, Hi.

So a little bit about you, just for our listeners.

So a little bit about you, just for our listeners.

So, Evan grew up in Westchester and New York, and you were very sporty growing up. You were asked to go to a special tennis school in Florida.

So, Evan grew up in Westchester and New York, and you were very sporty growing up. You were asked to go to a special tennis school in Florida.

Why didn't you go?

Why didn't you go?

I didn't go because I didn't have parents that pushed me. Thanks for opening up another wound, but they should have pushed me. So I had an opportunity to go to avolitary camp. I don't know if I was good, I probably wouldn't have made it because I think mentally I wasn't really ready to be good at tennis. But I was supposed to live there right after sanm person Agacy. I was a shy kid, so I said no. My parents were like, oh, that's good, we'll keep you at home. In retrospect, what they should have done and said, get your ass down there, and you know, not follow your dreams, follow our dreams, which was they wanted me to be a great tennis player, but they didn't want to push me.

I didn't go because I didn't have parents that pushed me. Thanks for opening up another wound, but they should have pushed me. So I had an opportunity to go to avolitary camp. I don't know if I was good, I probably wouldn't have made it because I think mentally I wasn't really ready to be good at tennis. But I was supposed to live there right after sanm person Agacy. I was a shy kid, so I said no. My parents were like, oh, that's good, we'll keep you at home. In retrospect, what they should have done and said, get your ass down there, and you know, not follow your dreams, follow our dreams, which was they wanted me to be a great tennis player, but they didn't want to push me.

So, well, you're still a great tennis player, and I know that that's influenced how you parents are kids.

So, well, you're still a great tennis player, and I know that that's influenced how you parents are kids.

But we'll get to that later.

But we'll get to that later.

So you graduated from Michigan in ninety six, still a huge Michigan fan, and Georgetown Business School.

So you graduated from Michigan in ninety six, still a huge Michigan fan, and Georgetown Business School.

And now now you teach at Georgetown.

And now now you teach at Georgetown.

What do you teach, of course on hedge fund investing? Actually two courses, so I was just trying to go over something right now, trying to get speed. I get speakers for a lot of my classes, so I make it a little bit easier on me. I only have to lecture the first two classes, and then outside of that then the speakers do the hard job for me.

What do you teach, of course on hedge fund investing? Actually two courses, so I was just trying to go over something right now, trying to get speed. I get speakers for a lot of my classes, so I make it a little bit easier on me. I only have to lecture the first two classes, and then outside of that then the speakers do the hard job for me.

I think I love that you're professor. I like breaking about that.

I think I love that you're professor. I like breaking about that.

You are a very avid, very avid reader. You watch the same movies over and over again, very into politics. But let's start with something a lot more shallow. Let me ask you.

You are a very avid, very avid reader. You watch the same movies over and over again, very into politics. But let's start with something a lot more shallow. Let me ask you.

So you spent four years as a full.

So you spent four years as a full.

Time spouse on the Real Housewives of New Jersey, two years as a part time spouse, but you were never into fame and you're pretty much a private person. You're not on social media. What is it like without commenting on your feelings about the show. What is it like for a private person to suddenly be thrust into this spotlight, this public sphere.

Time spouse on the Real Housewives of New Jersey, two years as a part time spouse, but you were never into fame and you're pretty much a private person. You're not on social media. What is it like without commenting on your feelings about the show. What is it like for a private person to suddenly be thrust into this spotlight, this public sphere.

By the way after twenty one years. Thanks for getting my bio correct. That's really impressive. So being a private person, you know, it's the uncertainty of what you're going to That's what I didn't like. I didn't know, So there's anxiety about, like I don't want to be recognized. I mean, you know the stories I tell about my favorite dinner of all time, and no offense. It's not with you, it's not with the kids. My favorite dinner is by myself in nineteen ninety nine, sitting at Nobu in London a book. I had my two souporos and I was by myself. I was free, like nobody noticed me. It was just, you know, I was incognito. Same thing as I used to love sitting on a subway and reading my newspaper and just you know, being essentially invisible to the world and then visible when I need to be. So for that, for bringing somebody that likes that and then being recognized on the street, I mean, it's it's it's a change, definitely, But I actually, you know what I'd be living if I said I didn't embrace it. And you see, like everybody that comes to me and asks for a picture, says Hi, I'm like, I'm flattered that they would ever come to me for anything. I mean, who am I anyway? You know, I'm a kind of a husband and father first, So to judge me based on you know, seeing me on the shows, you know, I got used to it, but I wouldn't. I wouldn't be honest if I said there wasn't some anxiety going into it. But it's actually turned out a lot better than I thought.

By the way after twenty one years. Thanks for getting my bio correct. That's really impressive. So being a private person, you know, it's the uncertainty of what you're going to That's what I didn't like. I didn't know, So there's anxiety about, like I don't want to be recognized. I mean, you know the stories I tell about my favorite dinner of all time, and no offense. It's not with you, it's not with the kids. My favorite dinner is by myself in nineteen ninety nine, sitting at Nobu in London a book. I had my two souporos and I was by myself. I was free, like nobody noticed me. It was just, you know, I was incognito. Same thing as I used to love sitting on a subway and reading my newspaper and just you know, being essentially invisible to the world and then visible when I need to be. So for that, for bringing somebody that likes that and then being recognized on the street, I mean, it's it's it's a change, definitely, But I actually, you know what I'd be living if I said I didn't embrace it. And you see, like everybody that comes to me and asks for a picture, says Hi, I'm like, I'm flattered that they would ever come to me for anything. I mean, who am I anyway? You know, I'm a kind of a husband and father first, So to judge me based on you know, seeing me on the shows, you know, I got used to it, but I wouldn't. I wouldn't be honest if I said there wasn't some anxiety going into it. But it's actually turned out a lot better than I thought.

Right, there were good parts of fame, right, name one. Well, I mean it does open doors. Did it open any doors for you?

Right, there were good parts of fame, right, name one. Well, I mean it does open doors. Did it open any doors for you?

No?

No?

Shut of for you? But that's okay, No, really, I mean open it didn't open any doors?

Shut of for you? But that's okay, No, really, I mean open it didn't open any doors?

Really, I mean it opened a lot of doors for me.

Really, I mean it opened a lot of doors for me.

Well that's the most important, Like going into this, I think your happiness is my happiness, right, So to see you happy in being able to chase some of your dreams, like, that's fantastic as well, So fantastic.

Well that's the most important, Like going into this, I think your happiness is my happiness, right, So to see you happy in being able to chase some of your dreams, like, that's fantastic as well, So fantastic.

So without you know, talking about specifics or laying any blame or anything, there was you did have one very bad season where a lot of negative things are said about you. What was that like for you as a private person to see people in the public sphere of commenting on you, commenting on like.

So without you know, talking about specifics or laying any blame or anything, there was you did have one very bad season where a lot of negative things are said about you. What was that like for you as a private person to see people in the public sphere of commenting on you, commenting on like.

Untruths about you. Was it uncomfortable? Did it make you angry?

Untruths about you. Was it uncomfortable? Did it make you angry?

You know, I was more angry at the situation than anything because going into it, you know, we had or you had said, like, You're not going to be impacted at all. You're just gonna be there. You're probably gonna be doing a bunch of shots with the guys. You're gonna be eating a lot of lamp shops like you always do in the background. So to have like my reputation smeared in a way, yeah, I thought that was That was what bothered me more than anything. Yeah, just because going into it, like you know, I thought, look, it's it's gonna take some of my time. I'm gonna be doing some things I don't want to do, but but I'm gonna be protected reputation wise. And then when that reputation was sullied in a way like that, obviously that the whole situation annoyed me more than anything. That That's why I was angry, to be honest, Like, the whole situation is like why am I doing this? Not only am I a jet fan and I have to live through a misery, but now I have to live through this. I mean, not not making light of it, but still like it was. It was annoying just being in that situation.

You know, I was more angry at the situation than anything because going into it, you know, we had or you had said, like, You're not going to be impacted at all. You're just gonna be there. You're probably gonna be doing a bunch of shots with the guys. You're gonna be eating a lot of lamp shops like you always do in the background. So to have like my reputation smeared in a way, yeah, I thought that was That was what bothered me more than anything. Yeah, just because going into it, like you know, I thought, look, it's it's gonna take some of my time. I'm gonna be doing some things I don't want to do, but but I'm gonna be protected reputation wise. And then when that reputation was sullied in a way like that, obviously that the whole situation annoyed me more than anything. That That's why I was angry, to be honest, Like, the whole situation is like why am I doing this? Not only am I a jet fan and I have to live through a misery, but now I have to live through this. I mean, not not making light of it, but still like it was. It was annoying just being in that situation.

Yeah, I think that's the fear that most husbands would have going in, Like they want to support their wife, but they're afraid of getting dried into the drama when they don't want to be a part of the drama. But on our show, the men do want to be a part of the drama, and you kind of always stood outside of that. Are there any other husbands you feel like don't want to be involved in the drama.

Yeah, I think that's the fear that most husbands would have going in, Like they want to support their wife, but they're afraid of getting dried into the drama when they don't want to be a part of the drama. But on our show, the men do want to be a part of the drama, and you kind of always stood outside of that. Are there any other husbands you feel like don't want to be involved in the drama.

No, I think most of the husbands embraced it for some reason. That's just not my personality. I mean, there's a variety of reasons why I don't want to, Like I feel like there's more downside to my career than upside, and if I act like a fool or say what I want like there's then that opens me up to criticism from people online, which you know, I don't even read it anyway, but still I don't want that. You know, I did the show for you one hundred percent, Like there was no like, there is no what can I get out of this? That was not my motivation at all, and obviously because I got nothing out of it beside your happiness, but nothing personally for me. Like there's no business opportunities that were opened up, I can tell you, like in twenty twenty despite what happened in twenty twenty one, Like it was so boring being at home every day thing doing the same thing. I mean, you know, I didn't even go past the driveway for like the first two months. Yeah, so something that's a little bit different. That was great, Like the timing was fine. You know. I wish there wasn't a rumor that was started at my birthday party, which is why I'm always scared of my birthday now. But outside of that.

No, I think most of the husbands embraced it for some reason. That's just not my personality. I mean, there's a variety of reasons why I don't want to, Like I feel like there's more downside to my career than upside, and if I act like a fool or say what I want like there's then that opens me up to criticism from people online, which you know, I don't even read it anyway, but still I don't want that. You know, I did the show for you one hundred percent, Like there was no like, there is no what can I get out of this? That was not my motivation at all, and obviously because I got nothing out of it beside your happiness, but nothing personally for me. Like there's no business opportunities that were opened up, I can tell you, like in twenty twenty despite what happened in twenty twenty one, Like it was so boring being at home every day thing doing the same thing. I mean, you know, I didn't even go past the driveway for like the first two months. Yeah, so something that's a little bit different. That was great, Like the timing was fine. You know. I wish there wasn't a rumor that was started at my birthday party, which is why I'm always scared of my birthday now. But outside of that.

I'll never throw you a party again.

I'll never throw you a party again.

Well didn't I tell you before that? Please don't do.

Well didn't I tell you before that? Please don't do.

You keep in touch with any of the husbands.

You keep in touch with any of the husbands.

I did, but not anymore. No, I mean there's Louis is the only one that I talked to because you know, we go out to dinner with them outside of that, Like I don't, but you know how guys are, Like if if we wanted to talk, we would just get together, have a bunch of drinks and feel like nothing's changed over the last two years.

I did, but not anymore. No, I mean there's Louis is the only one that I talked to because you know, we go out to dinner with them outside of that, Like I don't, but you know how guys are, Like if if we wanted to talk, we would just get together, have a bunch of drinks and feel like nothing's changed over the last two years.

Yeah, okay, well that makes me happy.

Yeah, okay, well that makes me happy.

So here's my thing.

So here's my thing.

You talk a lot about one day running for political office. If you ran for political office, your name would get smeared a thousand times worse than anything that can happen on this show.

You talk a lot about one day running for political office. If you ran for political office, your name would get smeared a thousand times worse than anything that can happen on this show.

So why is that okay for you?

So why is that okay for you?

But not this because I'm running for political office, because I'm doing something that's good potentially not only for me, but more importantly, you have a change legacy, right Like, when you're running for political office, that's the best way to have a legacy to enact different legislation, to to be a voice on a pro Israel voice, on a low tax voice, on a socially liberal voice. So you know, I'm throwing all those things out there, so you can't even tell what uh what political party I am. But look, I think it's doing. It's it's a necessary evil. I don't love it, but it's it's a it's a means to an end. That that's it's part of the territory when you're running for political office, right like, they're going.

But not this because I'm running for political office, because I'm doing something that's good potentially not only for me, but more importantly, you have a change legacy, right Like, when you're running for political office, that's the best way to have a legacy to enact different legislation, to to be a voice on a pro Israel voice, on a low tax voice, on a socially liberal voice. So you know, I'm throwing all those things out there, so you can't even tell what uh what political party I am. But look, I think it's doing. It's it's a necessary evil. I don't love it, but it's it's a it's a means to an end. That that's it's part of the territory when you're running for political office, right like, they're going.

Well, I mean you'd be okay being attacked like all over the place.

Well, I mean you'd be okay being attacked like all over the place.

Yeah, of course, okay, I'll be fine.

Yeah, of course, okay, I'll be fine.

But look, one's a reality show, right, and then one is you're getting attacked for being on a reality show, and the other one you're attacked because you're you're trying to do good for people by being an office lot.

But look, one's a reality show, right, and then one is you're getting attacked for being on a reality show, and the other one you're attacked because you're you're trying to do good for people by being an office lot.

I know ninety nine point nine nine percent of politicians don't try to do good for society, but they try to do good for themselves. I would be running only for the whole purpose of hopefully making you know, my constituency, whatever district I am in, or the country as a whole better. That's it.

I know ninety nine point nine nine percent of politicians don't try to do good for society, but they try to do good for themselves. I would be running only for the whole purpose of hopefully making you know, my constituency, whatever district I am in, or the country as a whole better. That's it.

Do you think that being on the show would hurt you or help you?

Do you think that being on the show would hurt you or help you?

Hurt me?

Hurt me?

Why?

Why?

I mean, it didn't hurt Donald Trump, but I think, now, well that's a great one. How many other reality people have ever run for office has been successful? Like, it doesn't happen because there's I think, frankly, there's a negative connotation. People kind of look at you like, oh, you're that guy who was accused of something. You're that guy who's always in the back dooring shots with the other guys. Like you just don't look like a serious You don't look like a serious person at that point.

I mean, it didn't hurt Donald Trump, but I think, now, well that's a great one. How many other reality people have ever run for office has been successful? Like, it doesn't happen because there's I think, frankly, there's a negative connotation. People kind of look at you like, oh, you're that guy who was accused of something. You're that guy who's always in the back dooring shots with the other guys. Like you just don't look like a serious You don't look like a serious person at that point.

Okay, I understand that.

Okay, I understand that.

So let's shift and let's talk about social media, because you're not so active on social media, but you have witnessed the effect that it's definitely had on me. Also the effect that it's had on our kids, specifically our daughter, without going into specifics, she just did not have good reactions to social media.

So let's shift and let's talk about social media, because you're not so active on social media, but you have witnessed the effect that it's definitely had on me. Also the effect that it's had on our kids, specifically our daughter, without going into specifics, she just did not have good reactions to social media.

A lot of fighting on there.

A lot of fighting on there.

She's in middle school, a lot of dangerous algorithms, bullying. But I see it as a necessary evil because that's the way the kids socialize now, and it's here to stay.

She's in middle school, a lot of dangerous algorithms, bullying. But I see it as a necessary evil because that's the way the kids socialize now, and it's here to stay.

It's not going anywhere.

It's not going anywhere.

Tell me what your thoughts on are kids, kids in general today and social media and parenting, what you do with it all.

Tell me what your thoughts on are kids, kids in general today and social media and parenting, what you do with it all.

I think you can probably heard me in the car when we were going somewhere in Las Vegas. And I truly believe this. If you look at your kids' screen time, and I was looking at Hudson's and it was like seven hours a day, all right, seven hours a day, all right. Maybe he's listening to podcasts, you know, maybe he's doing research on you know, biomechanics or something that's good for you. And it was like three hours on TikTok, two hours on Instagram. So what I say is social media is here to stay and you said it's a necessary evil, but still an evil. Right, That's not good. If you spend ten to fifteen minutes a day just looking at some stories, et cetera, that's fine. If you're spending hours on it, that's hours that you can be doing homework to get better grades. Hours that if you say, like some of our kids like basketball, obviously they want to be good basketball players, those are hours that you could be practicing that you can be getting better at something. I also think that you have a lot of these anonymous trolls and fools on social media that can say whatever they want and they kind of on behind behind you know, a door that nobody ever sees behind that door, so you just remain anonymous. I think it's it's a cesspool of misinformation. It's a cesspool of people just trying to get a rise out of you. And like the people that usually say stuff that say mean stuff like I had people you know, who write to me and talk to me about like my jewno's and like stuff like that. I don't kind of laugh because I have fine, I got a jew nose. I don't care. But at the same time, the people that are writing it are like these disgusting low lives. And that's why, you know, when when I talk to you about like people saying stuff on social media to you, you have to consider who's writing it and who's saying it. Like most of the people, not all, but most of the people that are writing these mean things that are taking time out of their day to try to diminish you are the biggest losers in the world.

I think you can probably heard me in the car when we were going somewhere in Las Vegas. And I truly believe this. If you look at your kids' screen time, and I was looking at Hudson's and it was like seven hours a day, all right, seven hours a day, all right. Maybe he's listening to podcasts, you know, maybe he's doing research on you know, biomechanics or something that's good for you. And it was like three hours on TikTok, two hours on Instagram. So what I say is social media is here to stay and you said it's a necessary evil, but still an evil. Right, That's not good. If you spend ten to fifteen minutes a day just looking at some stories, et cetera, that's fine. If you're spending hours on it, that's hours that you can be doing homework to get better grades. Hours that if you say, like some of our kids like basketball, obviously they want to be good basketball players, those are hours that you could be practicing that you can be getting better at something. I also think that you have a lot of these anonymous trolls and fools on social media that can say whatever they want and they kind of on behind behind you know, a door that nobody ever sees behind that door, so you just remain anonymous. I think it's it's a cesspool of misinformation. It's a cesspool of people just trying to get a rise out of you. And like the people that usually say stuff that say mean stuff like I had people you know, who write to me and talk to me about like my jewno's and like stuff like that. I don't kind of laugh because I have fine, I got a jew nose. I don't care. But at the same time, the people that are writing it are like these disgusting low lives. And that's why, you know, when when I talk to you about like people saying stuff on social media to you, you have to consider who's writing it and who's saying it. Like most of the people, not all, but most of the people that are writing these mean things that are taking time out of their day to try to diminish you are the biggest losers in the world.

Be honest, like I know, and it's and you've got a very level head about it. I had a very hard time. I signed off of Instagram for almost a month, and I know that during that time there was just tons of mean comments about me. They've all gone away, but you're really good at reminding me who's writing them. And I have to say, like, I've never, as much as I've disliked certain people, I've never ever gone on someone's page who I disliked and wrote something mean to them, even like.

Be honest, like I know, and it's and you've got a very level head about it. I had a very hard time. I signed off of Instagram for almost a month, and I know that during that time there was just tons of mean comments about me. They've all gone away, but you're really good at reminding me who's writing them. And I have to say, like, I've never, as much as I've disliked certain people, I've never ever gone on someone's page who I disliked and wrote something mean to them, even like.

I would never even consider doing that.

I would never even consider doing that.

So it's just bizarre to me that people have the time and the inclination to do that kind of stuff.

So it's just bizarre to me that people have the time and the inclination to do that kind of stuff.

But you're very good at reminding me.

But you're very good at reminding me.

You know what I think you should do from now on if you ever get a message from somebody that is mean. I want you to visualize what that person looks like where they're sitting in their parents' basement probably or like a shirt up to hear the sooner, you're a little bit of pop or you like disgusting, Like you have to be a disgusting person to write these disgusting things, and you have to ask something like really unhappy with your own life? You think about it. If they're trying to make you unhappy, they're probably unhappy in their own life.

You know what I think you should do from now on if you ever get a message from somebody that is mean. I want you to visualize what that person looks like where they're sitting in their parents' basement probably or like a shirt up to hear the sooner, you're a little bit of pop or you like disgusting, Like you have to be a disgusting person to write these disgusting things, and you have to ask something like really unhappy with your own life? You think about it. If they're trying to make you unhappy, they're probably unhappy in their own life.

So that's your Is that how you process it when people say rude thanks to you?

So that's your Is that how you process it when people say rude thanks to you?

I probably do. I just didn't realize, but yeah, probably. I just know that they're all anybody who would take time out of their day to write something to me where I'm so insignificant in this.

I probably do. I just didn't realize, but yeah, probably. I just know that they're all anybody who would take time out of their day to write something to me where I'm so insignificant in this.

World right now, Like no, you are not stop it.

World right now, Like no, you are not stop it.

No, My world is you, guys, is you and the kids. But like from a reality TV show, I'm a husband on a reality TV show. That's why they're going to write mean things like that's it's just so stupid, like save your time for more important things.

No, My world is you, guys, is you and the kids. But like from a reality TV show, I'm a husband on a reality TV show. That's why they're going to write mean things like that's it's just so stupid, like save your time for more important things.

I agree. Let's shift to I want your take on this.

I agree. Let's shift to I want your take on this.

So in our area, northern New Jersey is very super competitive when it comes to getting into college. Right, So we've got two high schoolers now, and I see what goes on with the I mean, there are college advisors that people hire that are tens of thousands of people. Parents have their kids starting businesses for their college applications. I don't want to do any of that. What I would like to do is what I did. Work hard, try my best, apply to schools and see where I get in. Study hard for the for the SATs, you know, get a tutor of course, or go to a course. I went to Princeton Review, and then see where you get in. And then for me, the most important is that not that our kids are at an Ivyleague.

So in our area, northern New Jersey is very super competitive when it comes to getting into college. Right, So we've got two high schoolers now, and I see what goes on with the I mean, there are college advisors that people hire that are tens of thousands of people. Parents have their kids starting businesses for their college applications. I don't want to do any of that. What I would like to do is what I did. Work hard, try my best, apply to schools and see where I get in. Study hard for the for the SATs, you know, get a tutor of course, or go to a course. I went to Princeton Review, and then see where you get in. And then for me, the most important is that not that our kids are at an Ivyleague.

School, but that they're at that are a way.

School, but that they're at that are a way.

Somewhere where they can learn independence and have a good time and learn and then get out.

Somewhere where they can learn independence and have a good time and learn and then get out.

And hustle and work their ass off. What are your thoughts?

And hustle and work their ass off. What are your thoughts?

Yeah, I mostly agree with that. So I the more I do this, you know, teaching and meet a lot of people like there's there's not really a high correlation in my opinion, between where you go to school and intelligence or success. You could be successful going to like an average school sometimes people just mature later. You know, I was. I got into a pretty good undergrad and I just I wasn't ready. I'm matured really later. Uh you'd probably say I'm stolen the process of mature. No, oh really, I'm a good actor then. But I think for the kids, yeah, Like I want them to be kids, and I want them to work hard. They don't have to do all this extraneous stuff like, you know, be the head of the bait club, start a finance club, start a nonprofit you know, to help you know, uh, the seals in Norway. Like, it just doesn't it's just not necessary. It's super competitive, get good grades. Work hard. Look, I think the working hard, I think that's an important character to have because you know, once you have that characteristic, you work hard. Now you know what it means to work hard during your first job, your second job, because that's then you set your career on a good path. And look, maybe our kids want to be in sports, maybe they want to be lawyers like you, maybe they want to go on finance, but whatever it is, they have to work hard and they have to earn what they got. I mean, that's the main thing.

Yeah, I mostly agree with that. So I the more I do this, you know, teaching and meet a lot of people like there's there's not really a high correlation in my opinion, between where you go to school and intelligence or success. You could be successful going to like an average school sometimes people just mature later. You know, I was. I got into a pretty good undergrad and I just I wasn't ready. I'm matured really later. Uh you'd probably say I'm stolen the process of mature. No, oh really, I'm a good actor then. But I think for the kids, yeah, Like I want them to be kids, and I want them to work hard. They don't have to do all this extraneous stuff like, you know, be the head of the bait club, start a finance club, start a nonprofit you know, to help you know, uh, the seals in Norway. Like, it just doesn't it's just not necessary. It's super competitive, get good grades. Work hard. Look, I think the working hard, I think that's an important character to have because you know, once you have that characteristic, you work hard. Now you know what it means to work hard during your first job, your second job, because that's then you set your career on a good path. And look, maybe our kids want to be in sports, maybe they want to be lawyers like you, maybe they want to go on finance, but whatever it is, they have to work hard and they have to earn what they got. I mean, that's the main thing.

And you know, I've been toying with going back to law that we'll talk about that another time.

And you know, I've been toying with going back to law that we'll talk about that another time.

But I never took the New Jersey Bar exam, so i'd have to sit for that again.

But I never took the New Jersey Bar exam, so i'd have to sit for that again.

But to think about it, yeah, I don't mind studying, though I want to shift to something else because I get a lot of people asking me how to help a loved one who's struggling with an eating disorder. So I just want to know because you and I don't talk about this too much, but I never really considered when I was anorexic for twenty years, I didn't really consider the impact on you.

But to think about it, yeah, I don't mind studying, though I want to shift to something else because I get a lot of people asking me how to help a loved one who's struggling with an eating disorder. So I just want to know because you and I don't talk about this too much, but I never really considered when I was anorexic for twenty years, I didn't really consider the impact on you.

And the kids.

And the kids.

It was very much a lonely disease that I didn't talk to anybody about. But I know it did impact you, and I touch on it in my book. But you know, just for all the people listening who have a loved one who struggles with any kind of addiction or illness, what's it like to watch someone you love do something dangerous to themselves and not be able to help them.

It was very much a lonely disease that I didn't talk to anybody about. But I know it did impact you, and I touch on it in my book. But you know, just for all the people listening who have a loved one who struggles with any kind of addiction or illness, what's it like to watch someone you love do something dangerous to themselves and not be able to help them.

You feel pretty helpless to why. It's always good to get outside help. But you know, I never said, hey, you need some help. I was more, you know, hey, why don't we make this together? Or why don't we go to dinner here? Why don't we do this? And you know, once the notes started piling up, I kind of, you know, went into my own shell a little bit, and I wish I could have helped you.

You feel pretty helpless to why. It's always good to get outside help. But you know, I never said, hey, you need some help. I was more, you know, hey, why don't we make this together? Or why don't we go to dinner here? Why don't we do this? And you know, once the notes started piling up, I kind of, you know, went into my own shell a little bit, and I wish I could have helped you.

Yeah, I mean, you know, I say, like, there's no there's no guidebook, like nobody tells you when you get married, like what to do if your spouse is, you know, slowly killing themselves. You know, because people ask me, they're like, well, couldn't Evan help you? And it's a mental illness, so it's very hard to you know, crack that nut with an adult. With a kid, you could stick them into rehab, but with an adult, it's really hard. Did you worry about the impact on the kids?

Yeah, I mean, you know, I say, like, there's no there's no guidebook, like nobody tells you when you get married, like what to do if your spouse is, you know, slowly killing themselves. You know, because people ask me, they're like, well, couldn't Evan help you? And it's a mental illness, so it's very hard to you know, crack that nut with an adult. With a kid, you could stick them into rehab, but with an adult, it's really hard. Did you worry about the impact on the kids?

Yes, yes, so yeah, I mean I was worried about it. And I think one thing that really shook you more than anything was when I told you that they noticed it and they asked me about it, which they did, so I mean.

Yes, yes, so yeah, I mean I was worried about it. And I think one thing that really shook you more than anything was when I told you that they noticed it and they asked me about it, which they did, so I mean.

They didn't know that Yeah, yeah, no, Look they observed.

They didn't know that Yeah, yeah, no, Look they observed.

They're smart kids, and they knew that it was a little bit different. So look, they just knew that it was different. They didn't know that it was kind of a mental illness. They didn't know any of that stuff. Frankly, I knew it was a mental illness. But there's only so much you can try. The hard thing, like being part of it and being the spouse to somebody that has the disease, is that you try and try, and then all of a sudden, like the more you try, the less likely you're going to get a positive response, because there's only so many ways to say, Hey, you know, let's let's go share a pizza right now, or let's cook together, let's make steaks together. I knew, like the answer is definitely going to be no. There had to be some willingness on your part to say, you know, it's a problem and I want to take care of it, and to seek outside help, professional help, Like I mean, I don't I.

They're smart kids, and they knew that it was a little bit different. So look, they just knew that it was different. They didn't know that it was kind of a mental illness. They didn't know any of that stuff. Frankly, I knew it was a mental illness. But there's only so much you can try. The hard thing, like being part of it and being the spouse to somebody that has the disease, is that you try and try, and then all of a sudden, like the more you try, the less likely you're going to get a positive response, because there's only so many ways to say, Hey, you know, let's let's go share a pizza right now, or let's cook together, let's make steaks together. I knew, like the answer is definitely going to be no. There had to be some willingness on your part to say, you know, it's a problem and I want to take care of it, and to seek outside help, professional help, Like I mean, I don't I.

Can help because it's not it's not about the availability of the food or someone to eat it with. It's it's much deeper than that. So can I ask you how life has changed since I've recovered.

Can help because it's not it's not about the availability of the food or someone to eat it with. It's it's much deeper than that. So can I ask you how life has changed since I've recovered.

It's great, it's fantastic, Like, I just love number one that you're happier, because you know, having having an eating disorder makes you irritable a lot. I know it makes it. It's just you're not living your life to the fullest. And I've always said that, you know, at a certain age, and I joke that I'm on the back nine of life now that I'm fifty. You have to enjoy life because it's it's short and sweet, and eating is a big part of it. I hate to say it, you know you sometimes three meals, four meals, but I know, whatever it is, however many meals a day. It's not something you can avoid. You can't. You can't just say, you know, I'm not going to do it. It's a big part of your life. It's a big part of enjoyment. It's a big part of socializing, which I know you love to do. So I'm just happy that you're happy. I think you've made some amazing strides. I'm very proud of you because I know a lot of people don't have the will power or the desire to make that change. Or maybe they have the desire, but they just don't have the ability to walk in and say I need help. And maybe that's a positive for the show. To be honest too, is that since everything was kind of televised, that it held you to be accountable to follow through in a way. So absolutely, So I hate to be positive on.

It's great, it's fantastic, Like, I just love number one that you're happier, because you know, having having an eating disorder makes you irritable a lot. I know it makes it. It's just you're not living your life to the fullest. And I've always said that, you know, at a certain age, and I joke that I'm on the back nine of life now that I'm fifty. You have to enjoy life because it's it's short and sweet, and eating is a big part of it. I hate to say it, you know you sometimes three meals, four meals, but I know, whatever it is, however many meals a day. It's not something you can avoid. You can't. You can't just say, you know, I'm not going to do it. It's a big part of your life. It's a big part of enjoyment. It's a big part of socializing, which I know you love to do. So I'm just happy that you're happy. I think you've made some amazing strides. I'm very proud of you because I know a lot of people don't have the will power or the desire to make that change. Or maybe they have the desire, but they just don't have the ability to walk in and say I need help. And maybe that's a positive for the show. To be honest too, is that since everything was kind of televised, that it held you to be accountable to follow through in a way. So absolutely, So I hate to be positive on.

The show, but so we take longer vacations. I don't exercise on vacation. Yeah, I mean.

The show, but so we take longer vacations. I don't exercise on vacation. Yeah, I mean.

Dinner, reading pizza together in Rome.

Dinner, reading pizza together in Rome.

Do that again, yeah, I would love.

Do that again, yeah, I would love.

To do that.

To do that.

All right, So your perspectives on life, and then I have some rapid fire questions and then I'll let you get back to your finance job. Your father was a Holocaust survivor, My grandparents were Holocaust survivors.

All right, So your perspectives on life, and then I have some rapid fire questions and then I'll let you get back to your finance job. Your father was a Holocaust survivor, My grandparents were Holocaust survivors.

How how did that affect you?

How how did that affect you?

How does that affect your perspective on life or anything that you've been through?

How does that affect your perspective on life or anything that you've been through?

What's your what's your take on like how to live a good life?

What's your what's your take on like how to live a good life?

I mean, one, I'm very pro Israel, so that's been passed down. But it's also you know, it's come organically just by by reading and you know, learning about certain things. So you know, I read a lot, a lot of Middle East politics and history and stuff. The perspective is life is short. I mean of obviously you know me better than anybody. Is that you know, not not to get too angry, not to get too high, too low, but to really just enjoy every moment and realize that life is short. So I always say that you know you're judged by you know, when you're on your deathbed, you know who's going to be there. So the most important thing in life is not material goods. It's the relationships that you have. And also, you know, you want to enjoy life. That's why I keep talking to you about, like, you know, four years and ten months, not that I'm counting when the kids are all away in school. I want to see the world, travel and experience things. So you know, you know, I don't want to be this guy who's seventy five years old, and I'm like, yeah, you know, I've been in New Jersey for the last forty years, and you know what, I really love New Jersey. Like like, New Jersey's fine, But I'm a big believer in seeing the world and experiencing things and not having any regrets by the time that your life is done, because everybody's life's over. You look at an actual aerial table. I'm supposed to live to eighty two, so I got another thirty two years and I want to enjoy those years.

I mean, one, I'm very pro Israel, so that's been passed down. But it's also you know, it's come organically just by by reading and you know, learning about certain things. So you know, I read a lot, a lot of Middle East politics and history and stuff. The perspective is life is short. I mean of obviously you know me better than anybody. Is that you know, not not to get too angry, not to get too high, too low, but to really just enjoy every moment and realize that life is short. So I always say that you know you're judged by you know, when you're on your deathbed, you know who's going to be there. So the most important thing in life is not material goods. It's the relationships that you have. And also, you know, you want to enjoy life. That's why I keep talking to you about, like, you know, four years and ten months, not that I'm counting when the kids are all away in school. I want to see the world, travel and experience things. So you know, you know, I don't want to be this guy who's seventy five years old, and I'm like, yeah, you know, I've been in New Jersey for the last forty years, and you know what, I really love New Jersey. Like like, New Jersey's fine, But I'm a big believer in seeing the world and experiencing things and not having any regrets by the time that your life is done, because everybody's life's over. You look at an actual aerial table. I'm supposed to live to eighty two, so I got another thirty two years and I want to enjoy those years.

I hope you have more than that. Do you have it? Do you have anything on your buck list?

I hope you have more than that. Do you have it? Do you have anything on your buck list?

Uh?

Uh?

Yeah, I want to see every country. I mean, that's it.

Yeah, I want to see every country. I mean, that's it.

Uh.

Uh.

And I may want to skydive, oh no, and I want to sky alone. No, you got to go. I don't want to into a volcano with you too.

And I may want to skydive, oh no, and I want to sky alone. No, you got to go. I don't want to into a volcano with you too.

Yes, there's so many I never I never do you do you have an inner critic?

Yes, there's so many I never I never do you do you have an inner critic?

And how do you silence it?

And how do you silence it?

Yeah, all the time, and I don't silence it, so I should be better. Everybody has an inner critic, so it's I mean, I'm definitely not a perfectionist, but I always feel like I could do better. The only way to really silence it is and these it happens maybe like ten percent of the time. Yesterday, like I was downstairs working here till like six thirty non stop, and then I want to come up and read and eat. But I felt like I accomplished a lot yesterday, so my inner critic was happy. There are other days are life, you know what, I could have done a lot more. And the same thing with kids too, by the way, is like my inner with them is you know, I just had a conversation with one of the kids saying, hey, are you really serious about asketball? Because if you are, then I'm going to train you and we're going to give you all the resources to be successful, and if you're not then that's fine. Just be a kid, chase girls have fun like drink, have fun like geca grades do you everything? Well, well, it's the best way to.

Yeah, all the time, and I don't silence it, so I should be better. Everybody has an inner critic, so it's I mean, I'm definitely not a perfectionist, but I always feel like I could do better. The only way to really silence it is and these it happens maybe like ten percent of the time. Yesterday, like I was downstairs working here till like six thirty non stop, and then I want to come up and read and eat. But I felt like I accomplished a lot yesterday, so my inner critic was happy. There are other days are life, you know what, I could have done a lot more. And the same thing with kids too, by the way, is like my inner with them is you know, I just had a conversation with one of the kids saying, hey, are you really serious about asketball? Because if you are, then I'm going to train you and we're going to give you all the resources to be successful, and if you're not then that's fine. Just be a kid, chase girls have fun like drink, have fun like geca grades do you everything? Well, well, it's the best way to.

Give me drink at twenty one.

Give me drink at twenty one.

No, you know, I'm half Belgian, So in Belgium there's.

No, you know, I'm half Belgian, So in Belgium there's.

No drinking age, is there not? No, there is. It's European. It's eighteen right.

No drinking age, is there not? No, there is. It's European. It's eighteen right.

Like four. My dad was giving me wine when I was like three.

Like four. My dad was giving me wine when I was like three.

Really, yeah, ANSI drinking?

Really, yeah, ANSI drinking?

But see, I think you got a drink in moderation when you're young, so that you don't abuse it later.

But see, I think you got a drink in moderation when you're young, so that you don't abuse it later.

I agree with that. The kids had wine in Italy, they didn't really like it.

I agree with that. The kids had wine in Italy, they didn't really like it.

One of our kids had like three glasses and was still fun.

One of our kids had like three glasses and was still fun.

Yeah.

Yeah.

That concerns me. Do you believe in karma? Yes, Yeah, that's good to know.

That concerns me. Do you believe in karma? Yes, Yeah, that's good to know.

It's usually negative.

It's usually negative.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I think it's like if you if people have done bad things, do you let the universe handle them?

I think it's like if you if people have done bad things, do you let the universe handle them?

Well, what's the opposite of karma? Fate face?

Well, what's the opposite of karma? Fate face?

No, I think it's the same thing, same thing, yeah, or do you just believe? Do you believe, like in a higher power in the universe? I know we're not religious. We're part of the Jewish community, but we're not religious.

No, I think it's the same thing, same thing, yeah, or do you just believe? Do you believe, like in a higher power in the universe? I know we're not religious. We're part of the Jewish community, but we're not religious.

Yeah. Well, I believe that h plus of one success, like business wise, is based on luck. Really in my industry, it's like, at least I've seen so many dumb people make so much money.

Yeah. Well, I believe that h plus of one success, like business wise, is based on luck. Really in my industry, it's like, at least I've seen so many dumb people make so much money.

And I think the last thing I want to ask you is what what really brings you the most joy?

And I think the last thing I want to ask you is what what really brings you the most joy?

Just family relationships. That's it really is, like experiencing things together, you know what. Like one of the happiest moments was when we were at Arizona. I want to climbing those mountains, Like that was fantastic. Just being with all of you, nobody fighting, doing something active, being with just the core of five plus me. That's all I care about. I'm not like you know me, I haven't even gone shopping outside of what you bought me for my birthday, which was great. Like, I don't really care about material goods. I care about relationships. Love. That's really it.

Just family relationships. That's it really is, like experiencing things together, you know what. Like one of the happiest moments was when we were at Arizona. I want to climbing those mountains, Like that was fantastic. Just being with all of you, nobody fighting, doing something active, being with just the core of five plus me. That's all I care about. I'm not like you know me, I haven't even gone shopping outside of what you bought me for my birthday, which was great. Like, I don't really care about material goods. I care about relationships. Love. That's really it.

I love you, your great husband.

I love you, your great husband.

Thank you for standing by my side during my recovery. Thank you for being on this show with me. Begrudgingly. I know you did not want to do it when it started. I don't know where it's going from here.

Thank you for standing by my side during my recovery. Thank you for being on this show with me. Begrudgingly. I know you did not want to do it when it started. I don't know where it's going from here.

But we'll see.

But we'll see.

It's only going to great places because you're at the helme. That's it.

It's only going to great places because you're at the helme. That's it.

Ah, well, I'm not the helme of the show.

Ah, well, I'm not the helme of the show.

No, no, no, I'm not talking about my podcast talking about the Housewives.

No, no, no, I'm not talking about my podcast talking about the Housewives.

Oh yeah, all right, you don't want me to answer that.

Oh yeah, all right, you don't want me to answer that.

No, I mean listen. I don't know where it's going, but podcasting. I love. Thank you for being a part of it. Thank you, and uh, do you have any questions for me?

No, I mean listen. I don't know where it's going, but podcasting. I love. Thank you for being a part of it. Thank you, and uh, do you have any questions for me?

No? Can I come upstairs and make so munch?

No? Can I come upstairs and make so munch?

You should? Yeah, come upstairs. I'd love to see you.

You should? Yeah, come upstairs. I'd love to see you.

All right, everyone, that's our episode for today. Thank you for joining us, and thank you Evan for joining us. I love you, love you, and love all you guys, and I will see you next time.

All right, everyone, that's our episode for today. Thank you for joining us, and thank you Evan for joining us. I love you, love you, and love all you guys, and I will see you next time.