Two Guys, Five Rings: Matt, Bowen & The OlympicsThe Closing Ceremony of the Paris Olympics happened Sunday as the torch is passed onto Los Angeles! Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang tally up the medals and look at some of the final performances of these Olympics. Will we see Simone Biles in 2028? What sports could be added by the time the Games reopen in LA? Find out in the latest episode of the Two Guys, Five Rings Podcast!
R ring ring ring Ring. I still laugh when we do it. I love ring ring ring ring ring.
And you know what, there's nothing specific to Paris about them, Like, we're going to do this for Milan for twenty twenty six, assuming they'll have us back. We're going to do this for Los Angeles in twenty twenty eight. We're going to do this in Salt Lake City in twenty thirty. The list goes on. Can I say not me having La Pride right now? Okay? So are we are we chaining our two now? On the LA Olympics of it all A little.
Bit like I don't know, like the the so I've been kind of on the fence about the Olympics in LA and twenty twenty eight of it all because I live here and I'm telling you it's not necessarily infrastructure wise tenable to have more people here. But I will say the cultural you know moment that was the handoff. It was a lot of fun, and I was like, you know, it is fun to have the Olympics in LA. I mean like in terms of the way that they little did our words. Maybe I just like Words of a Feather by Billie Eilish that much.
Maybe you just that I got emotional seeing Doctor Dre up there tbh.
It was cool. It was cool.
That was cool. Yeah, you know, we're getting so ahead of ourselves. Let's get to the two guys stuff first. I mean, maybe this all kind of this.
Feels like two guys. I mean, essentially making it about a pop girlly immediately, and even even Doctor Drey and I haven't even started on Anthony Keatis And how how do he is? So that we're in two guysland.
I knew you were going to talk about Anthony. I mean to say nothing of the long Beach of it all. That was a long beach show and the y was very spring break can kun. But we're in La. Oh right, we're in La. But yeah, oh my gosh, Matt, how do you feel now that we've closed out the twenty twenty four Olympic Games? And I just want to correct myself. Twenty thirty is going to be in the French Alps. We're going to be back in France in twenty thirty. Twenty thirty four is maybe Salt Lake City.
So I was like kind of surprised that there were turning to Salt Lake City so soon, because I feel like we were just there because we were.
Two thousand and two. It was thirty two years ago. I mean, I mean it is twenty two years ago from today, but it will be thirty two years from the last Salt Lake City Games in twenty thirty four. Does that make sense?
Yeah? Wow, old, we're gonna be old.
Or we're going to be old.
But I feel great. I think this was an amazing Olympics. I think, you know, holistically, not only were they largely and roundly triumphant for the people that we were rooting for, with notable exceptions which we'll get into, but I have to command the presentation of the Olympics themselves by NBC Peacock, I mean the multiview and I Heeart Radio and I Heart Radio. I mean, just like overall, like this was easy to watch. You never felt like you were really missing anything, and I thought everything was executed really well. And in terms of Paris as the host, I thought they did an amazing job. And it feel it felt really seamless. It felt like a real celebration of their culture. Like at moments it felt like very specific in niche but also global in that weird French way. The humor was there, the vibes were there, I mean, you know, the like uh it just it felt like a real success to me.
And they did it.
What about that song? Is so New York coded to me? That to close it out.
With my asi o funny? So she's she's amazing, incredible, incredible, airy good. So okay, I must agree with you. I could not have put better myself. I won't even attempt to.
Shot.
Okay, well, I'm going to make another retraction right now.
Okay.
I remember saying after the opening ceremony, I wish it was in a stadium. I like that there was a balance, because otherwise it would have felt redundant if both closing and opening were going to be Instead de France, I like either. I like one stadium, either in the opening and I like the closing. I think one. It should be one of each, one in a stadium, one incorporating some processional aspect or some spatially distinct thing of the host city Paris. I think reinvigorated the Olympics for the World Tokyo. It was never going to really pop off, of course with COVID. I don't even I don't remember getting into Rio that much as much as I did with this.
You know, I would agree. I think this was the most successful. You felt like there was like some international pride to be had whatever that means. Like it felt like positive, you know what I'm saying. It felt largely positive. And I look back on that opening ceremony finally as well, I agree with you.
Me too, So I take that back. But I will say, let's send up another Voyager spaceship and let's put in the Simone Biles Jordan Childs bowing to Rebecca Androgy moment. Again, I'm still not over this. That is that I maintain that is the best of what humanity has to offer in that moment, sportsmanship, triumph, support, international relations, peace, and we'll get into Jordan Chiles later, but overall, an incredible, incredible two weeks. I'm very sad that it's over, and I cannot say that about an Olympics since Beijing.
Yeah, this was great. I mean I will also say, just and they did it. Like I said, we touched on it briefly, but why not touch on it more because this is technically like we're supposed to be recapping the closing ceremony here, but like I was really surprised. I had heard about the Tom Cruise of it all, and then I was surprised to really enjoy it, you know what I mean. Like I was like, hey, when they showed him on top of that stadium and he looked back over his shoulder and then jumped off of it, I'm like, yeah, I mean, this is the sort of maximalist La Hollywood Olympics that if we're going to go for it, if we're gonna have the Olympics in La, Tom Cruise should be jumping off, you know what I mean. Like he should be we should have see his LA plastic surgery. This should be that we should be unapologetic about it. Pulled tight, but literally watching Tom, I was like, Okay, this is warped in several different ways. But he is definitely good at holding that frame, babe. I mean, he is the movie star he is. He's looking good, he's wearing the hell out of those pants. Loved that he was running up the ramp and didn't want to run like the five steps more to clear the ramp. He hopped up off the ramp. Hello to Karen Bass and Karen Bass, I mean that's my mayor right there. And to know that she was on the global stage. Loved that, loved that they had Simone doing the handoff. I mean, Simone is the superstar of the Olympics. I think there's no dispute there. And then when he sped off and made it to Hollywood so fast on that little bike, and you know, the rings were up on the Hollywood sign, and I said, this could be fun. This could be a lot of fun. And then I loved everything that happened in Long Beach, including the beach volleyball players that were just their chillin' while Billy was performing. I love it, just continued their game.
I love that, and Billy was. Billy was really into it. I think one of the amazing live performances of Birds of a Feather. Yeah, I mean there was a lipsyng track definitely, Yeah, yeah, yeah. But she's that's just a production thing.
Her live vocal is so good. And of course, I mean, I'm telling you, what is this lost cult. I was at Coachella when she came out for Lana del Rey and Billy's voice live. It's very special, very special girl. And you know it from SNL.
Of course, we all know it from Oscars twice over Yeah, I'm just saying being in the room is cool. So to have been on that beach, I mean, shame on those beach volleyball players for continuing to bump and set because a legend was singing. A legend was singing. But that's okay. Volleyball stops for no one. We will see that in four years. I want them to do fencing in front of pot.
Oh that would be amazing. Wow, that would be hard. It's very hilly over there.
Yeah, but you know we open the flight, how about that?
Like, you know, we need to first of all. This is why I say, like New York came back after the pandemic in LA never did because as long as the arc light in Las closed, LA is not working. We don't have a working city until that arc light is open again, and we need to do it.
What are your thoughts on speaking of Karen Bass? Ambitious, ambitious. I think this is impossible, but I love to be proven wrong. No Car Olympics in twenty twenty eight. She wants this is the Los Angeles. Wants everyone the influx of hundreds of thousands of tourists coming in. She wants everyone to be able to access every Olympic venue through public transit. Right now, public transit and Los Angeles not in a good place. I think we can all agree. Unhouse population, terrible place. It's going to be tough. But look, I really I pray we at the end of the day, we love Los Angeles onto you guys five rings.
I mean, what's going to have to happen is they're going to have to change almost every and I think that they are. I think I think that that public transit is about to like they're really going to make a go for it here in the next couple of years. In terms of how.
Tod it's four years is not a long time for this, for this kind of infrastructure stuff.
I mean literally, it's they're going to have to change a lot because I'm like, you can't even drive on a Tuesday in the afternoon.
Love la love what it can be.
And yes, I have lots to say about this, as you can tell as I'm sure you do as well. So everyone, including Karen Bass can just wait. We have lots of ideas and feelings. I sousing ceremonies were great. I loved watching all the athletes vibe. It's a party that's like like the shoulders are dropped.
It's done. The count is over. By the way, congratulations to the United States of America for most golds or I'm sorry for most metals and tied with golds with China. I mean, this is the thing I'll miss most about the Olympics, the only moment of acceptable nationalism that we as Americans can experience.
Well, let's hope not.
For now. This is I do feel refreshed. I miss this feeling of loving country and I have not had this feeling in a while, and I certainly felt that way the entire time during these Olympic Games.
Speaking of national privates, so let's talk about these medals. So forty Olympic gold medals for the United States of America forty four silver, forty two bronze, one hundred twenty six total, followed by China with ninety one total medals and forty gold medals. Then we have Great Britain with sixty five total medals, and you know France at sixty four. They hung in there. But really it was about the US. It was about us. I mean, listen, hey, this because they ain't US.
Main character syndrome has never been more apparent, has.
The main character syndrome in such a way.
And if this was our other podcast, this would be a rule of culture. But we can't. We just can't. Let's see, uh, I was just I really quickly, just want to go back to the closing ceremonies though a lot of gags besides the La handoff Phoenix. Loved seeing Phoenix sing their hits from nineteen ninety nine or from two thousand, it's their first album. That hanging piano, that vertical piano. Did you clock that?
I sure did.
Miss Mama playing the piano while being dragged up, and the Golden Voyager running around and his little circu to Soley Ass. I know, I know that's French Canada. But in his circ to Soley Ass, get up with all those hot little statuesque dancers. I think some of those were some of the breakers from from I think I think ray Gun in there somewhere.
Wait can talk about the breaking.
Let's talk about the breaking. We're just jumping all around. Let's talk about breaking.
Come on, that was flopped to me.
Oh brother, and now he said it. I don't need breaking. I get that be the only time we see it. But I'm happy. I'm Look, this is the thing about the Olympics. They try new things. Okay, everyone thinks it's a stead institutional thing, which it is in a lot of ways. But this was the first Olympics to have full gender parody. It was a younger, more inclusive, more sustainable Olympics. It is forward thinking in this way and it has room for something like breaking even though mixed results, but a viral, Internet worthy sticky you know, in the Internet sense, sticky stories. Out of that, Reygun will forever be a legend. And she has I think a beautiful attitude about this.
I mean, she couldn't help that it was an event and that she qualified for it, you know what I mean. It's like, here's the thing. If you never try, sure you'll never fail, but you'll never succeed. And she is an Olympian. That is something that she had and I just want to say, let's just get into it. So for those of you who may be on living under a rock in terms of the breaking of it all, we're talking about Australian breakdancer Rachel Gunn aka ray Gun Iconic, has caused quite a stir on social media after her performance at the twenty twenty four Paris Olympics, Breaking, more commonly noticed breakdancing made its debut as we all know, and Gun went viral online after her performance on Friday in the round robin stage of the women's breaking competition, she was swept out without earning a single point. Gun defended her dance moves she is she tried to wow the audience with a kangaroo dance, among other moves, but she has no qualms about the performance, being quoted as saying, I was never gonna beat these girls on what they do best, their power moves. What I bring is creativity.
We all have a kangaroo dance in our hearts period.
It goes like this, Oh my god, that's wait. The Apple dance sort.
Of is giving kangaroo I think she was inspired by the Apple Dance.
Maybe she was. Had she come out there and done the Apple Dance, maybe she would have gotten a point.
What if the Apple dance When Charlie XCX says, I think the Apple's rotten right to the core. What if the Apple is an Internet culture?
I think she was talking about the judges, the gymnastics judges.
Oh my god, what a perfect segue.
That sucks and can I say, like Jordan Chiles, they could never make you not my bronze medalist.
These Romanian girls, bless them, would not have bowed to Rebecca. And that is still the thing that I think is the most important thing to come out of these games, the medals, lebron Steph Curry, we love Shack. Here, we'll talk about all these things. That is the moment for me of this entire olymp Jordan Chiles was a huge part of that. This is we're talking about a four second window. Let's let's just summarize what's happening for people who don't know. Yes, so the US is appealing a ruling that has forced Jordan Childs to return her bronze medal. Basically, a US coach to Seal Landy sent in an appeal. What people are saying, four seconds after the one minute time limit for scoring inquiry, She's sent in an inquiry a minute and four seconds after Jordan left the floor. Cis Court of Arbitration for Sport, which handles these inquiries and these appeals, has now got ahead and said that Jordan has to return her medal. I think I think they have the last word on it. Jordan is taking a big break from social media. It's so devastating and this process is maybe months years long. We really hope this does not demoralize Jordan to say a level that would discourage her from competing again. She has such a bright feud, she has such a well that just to her you know, but you know what, and not to like produce have produced her brain too much on this. But this is a this is an amazing story going into LA twenty twenty eight. Not an amazing story. We wish it didn't happen, but this is something that is another opportunity for triumph. Even though it is devastating right now, we are all feeling for Jordan. There are frankly some racist attacks going on on the internet against her from let's just say, like the corners of the internet internationally speaking. But yeah, it's really unfortunate. The International Gymnastics Federation FIG said on Saturday that would respect the court's decision and elevate Anna Barboso of Romania to third IOC confirmed the ruling on Sunday before the closing ceremony. It is reallocating the medal, so.
It feels like this is one of those moments where you give them both the bronze medal and like this just feels ugly and just to I don't know.
Everyone's Steve Harvey in this situation. And then and these are you know, all of these girls are the miss Universes. It's like, you can't do this.
And Jordan age Wise will definitely be back, right absolutely, because I guess I mean, we'll get into the athletes who are announcing retirements in a second. But you know, it's there's precedent for her to come back and slay it off again. You know, I would have I would love for her to come around, like work her mass off and come around and slay the all around Like I think this You're right, there is like a ready made narrative here for an amazing Olympic story. But wow, the pressure of that and the disappointment of this moment is probably a lot. I hope she does take care of herself, clearly she is, Yeah, but.
This is that thing.
Remember we said in the very first episode of this, like the pressure of this is so intense, and you know, I recently watched Simone Biles on the Call Her Daddy podcast with fellow Olympic podcaster Alex Cooper and She was going on at length about how when she had her sort of moment in Tokyo where she had to pull herself out, one of the first things she was thinking about in the midst of her sort of like downturn was what is Twitter saying? Like that is something that is really on the minds of these athletes now, Like these people are not only on the world stage, but they're on the world stage in the Year of Our Lord twenty twenty four, and they're young, and they're online. I mean, you see these girls after they get off, like when they stop finished their medals, they immediately flocked each to each other and talk about what tiktoks they're gonna do, you know, like they are not immune to the intense pressure of course that comes with any competition, especially on a global stage, but also the mind that is being talked about and dissected and you know, disrespected on social media regularly. So my thing with Jordan is she's got to go to great lengths to make sure that she has mental clarity because everyone's obviously got something to say about this, and they would anyway. So just hoping the best for her because she deserves it. I mean, how many times did we jump out of our chair watching her compete like she's a true superstar.
Yeah, and we love you, Jordan. If you're listening, we know you are. Other wonderful things that have happened since our last episode.
Sha, Carrie, I can take this should. Carrie Richardson secured her first Olympic Old Metal after a thundering anchor leg in the women's four by one relay on Friday. Oh, the anchor leg of a relay?
Bow?
You ever watched one live?
Never?
One day, I'll take you to a track meet. Oh. By the way, I have to update everyone I know. I said in the last episode of Two Guys Five Rings that I was going to find a track in LA and I was going to see what my mile time is now, because as we when it was in high school, it was blistering four minutes and thirty six seconds. Wow. It is incredibly hard to find a public four hundred meter track here in LA. I've even asked noted runner Pat Reagan about it and he said, it's like almost impossible. So this may have to be a storyline that gets followed over into Lost Culture. Is thus, So, if you are someone who just listens to two guys five rings. You're a two guys five rings head. Please join us on our.
Vics Lost culturists, the lost culture.
We would love to have your listenership, your readership even and it is there that I will close the loop, so to speak, on my mild time as of today.
Are you Tom Cruise because that handoff was excellent.
I mean call me Shakerry because she carried us to a gold medal in the four by one. So the Americans which are Shakar Richardson, Gabby Thomas, who by the way took the gold to the two hundred and amazing, amazing Melissa Jefferson and twenty Sha Teri braved a wet track and rainy conditions to win the team twelfth Olympic medal in the event. They did it in a time of forty one point seven eight seconds, a season best. Thomas ran the third leg and got her second gold medal in the Games. Like I said, her first go to wast gold medal was in the two hundred meters, which was amazing to watch. And when Thomas handed off to Richardson, the US was in third place. Richardson had to reel in Britain's Darryl Nita and Germany's Rebeccah Has and when she did, she flashed a look to her right and backward that said you ain't catching me. It marked a sweet clothes to the Olympics for Richardson, who came into the Olympics as a favorite but surprisingly felt to Julian Alfred of Saint Lucia in the one hundred meter race. So Shakrrie Richardson gets her well deserved gold medal and an iconic moment of looking over her shoulder at her competitor and saying, hmmm, so we love Shakari. You did it. Wish fulfillment, fulfilled, go off.
We hope you are getting the manicure of your life right now now. Women's basketball and men's basketball both winning both golds, going to the US beating France for both now really amazing stuff. I was kind of into the basketball this time in the Olympics, and uh love basketball. It's Steph Curry and Lebron James screaming an tweet into each other's faces. I said, kiss but y, that's just my fan fit.
Can you imagine that'll be amazing if they kissed? But wait, just together?
I mean I think that is Lebron's second most amorable moment in his life. The first will always be I can't believe this is my life, just smiling through it all. Can't believe this is my life, my life, just smiling through it all. Can we just flash that just on the on the instareel right now?
You know, I want to sound bored so bad I've wanted to son forever. Anyway, That's also a narrative that will carry over, so we mentioned it earlier. But several Olympians will retire after Paris, including the legendary Simon and Biles, who at twenty seven was the oldest woman to make an Olympics gymnastics team since the nineteen fifties, will be retiring. However, Biles did speak to Hodah, the legend Hoda, about her future in the sport and if she's considered in competing at the next Summer Games in la in twenty twenty eight, to which she said, you know, never say never. The next Olympics is on home turf, so you just never know. I'm just going to relax and see where life takes me. And she really should just relax, I mean, like she's dying.
So she's earned Dutch.
She's earned it. I would love to see her commentate.
Oh my gosh, are you kidding me? Yeah?
I love watching her top I said, I love that interview they call her daddy interview. That was great, like very telegenic. Oh incredibly so gosh, I'm really emotional.
But you know, there are some fun things to carry us over into the Paralympics. There are some fun things to carry over into Winter Olympics in Milan and also the Summer Olympic Games in Los Angeles, as you mentioned, all right, Matt, let's quickly give out our medals and close out this wonderful episode. As we cover the closing ceremonies, I'm gonna give bronze to I'm gonna give bronze to Sha Carry. What a moment, and.
That's a great moment. They're looking over the shoulder, the unbotheredness of it, the personality in there. We love it, we love it.
There's there's there's so much going on. That is a that is a sort of almost lab grown Olympic moment that I just love. And it's Sha Carry, who is such a perfect icon for this twenty twenty four Olympic games of like, you know, perfectly reflecting of the time that we're in.
What's your silver My silver metal goes to Anthony Ketis, who was performing in a boot. Something happened to his left foot, which doesn't surprise me at all. If Anthony Ketis of the Red hot Chelli Pepper strikes me as someone who often does something that hurts his left foot. And I have to say that, by the way, his autobiography Scar Tissue, one of the greats, one of the great Uh.
I love the Anthony Kiatis, you love Anthony Kilos.
I love anyone who's that hot, that's stupid, that talented, and that able to still get up there and do his thing in a boot. And if you don't think he took his mesh tank and put it over his head so he couldn't see, and showed his belly and torso and walked around that stage in a boot, putting himself at high risk to hurt his right foot, you'd be mistaken legend. And he wins my silver medal.
There's a there's a benevolent sort of masculinity there that's like reminiscent of like Jackass. Like it's like like I like I think there's that sort of world that I'm like, really really hopeful about. I'm like, no, no, he's these should be the men who lead us forward. And our gold is gonna I think we're going to break this tie between the US and China for most golds, and we're gonna give the gold to the United States of America.
The gold medal is won by the US.
And when her sang the Star straangled banner, I said acceptable nationalism. I said, I am proud to be an American, where at least I think I'm free.
Yep.
Well I changed the word no to think because sometimes the illusion of freedom is better than nothing.
Wow. Yeah, her really shreds on that guitar.
Too good for her because gosh, still very early in her career. Oscar Winner, Grammy Winner, got to perform with the Olympics at Dell, introduced her at SNL and.
She was bell in the live action Beauty and the Beast. So that's part of that you got. I'm sure.
I think if you arrange the letters of that, you get you good.
Yeah, Beauty and the Beast.
T any other thought.
I hope it's not. I hope it's not the last time we see breaking. I want I want everyone still just you took it back. No, I'm taking it back. I want everyone to see what happened in the breaking competition, and I think that people should feel inspired. And I do still think we should add singing, which brings me to Selene, and I think Selene should be an Olympic Gold Medalist for singing. And That's where I'll keep it.
Absolutely Now, I just want to say the thing we're not putting out about Reagan is that this entire situation is like a two thousand and seven comedy movie starring Chris Lily. Yeah, like someone who qualifies to be the Australian breaking representative and it's someone doing Chris Lily moves. Yeah, it's a mister g in Summer Heights High. This would have been like a Vince Vaughn film in two thousand and four, you know, like it's amazing, Like let's just let's just appreciate this moment, like it's really it's kind of fun and like God, thank goodness that she has the right attitude about it. I'm sure she's like I'm sure there's a level of embarrassment, but like internationally, I mean, this is the other thing about the Olympics this year. This is our first genuine monoculture in a long time, and I think this is a very good moment for monoculture. And this makes a case that sports is culture and we should probably talk about sports more on LA's culture.
Maybe I think the Olympics had I think the Olympics had a brat summer. Let's just let's just say that. Let's just say that it's so funny that you mentioned Vince Vaughn because I was just walking back from Barry's and Vince Vaughn is getting a Hollywood star in the walk off ame today and it was they were set up, and so it's like that was such an LA thing, and that is so LA twenty twenty Olympics coded, like the hollywoodness of it.
All, like Barry's boot campus. So I hope Barry's has a huge moment at the opening ceremony.
Oh yeah, I want Kyle k to light the torch. Kyle Kay is my favorite Bears and start fish shout out.
Okay, I want me mc andrew, who's my favorite Berris?
And sorry, no, that's that's that's too New York.
We love you and though.
Okay, so You guys can follow two Guys five Rings on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or your favorite podcast platform, and be sure to watch the twenty twenty four Paris Paralympic Games August twenty eighth to September eighth on NBC n Peacock
And Let's close out with the song
