The 7 Types Of School Parents

Published Aug 25, 2024, 7:45 PM

Ahh the School Drop Off. Every day, without fail, the parents converge upon the school gate, a ritual as old as time itself. Here, in this bustling microcosm, we observe a diverse array of species - each one unique, yet all playing a vital role in the ecosystem of school life.

This episode Tegan Natoli and Annaliese Todd have meticulously categorised the seven distinct types of school parents that roam the school grounds. Which ones will they identify themselves as? And why, you may ask, do we need all seven to maintain the delicate balance of this daily dance? Stay with us, as we uncover the answers. 

What type of school parent are you? Take the Quiz HERE

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CREDITS:

Host: Tegan Natoli, Annaliese Todd & Sarah Marie Fahd 

Producer: Grace Rouvray

Audio Producer: Lu Hill

Mamamia acknowledges the Traditional Owners of the Land we have recorded this podcast on, the Gadigal people of the Eora Nation. We pay our respects to their Elders past and present and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures.

You're listening to a MoMA Mia podcast.

Mama Mia acknowledges the traditional owners of land and waters that this podcast is recorded on.

Hello and welcome to this glorious mess. We're embracing the chaos together, ditching the judgment. I'm Annaly's todd. I've been a school parent for nearly seven years.

Oh wow, that sounds like you're a historian.

I am, and I am taking the tolly and guys, I'm officially thirty seven.

Oh happy there.

It was my birthday on Saturday, and you know, it's getting to the age where you actually start forgetting how old you are or how old you're turning.

I'm just going to stick at thirty seven.

I would too, because I'm in my forties and I don't want to talk about it. So today on the show, we're getting a little bit silly and if you're in school drop off and pick up mode or yet to reach that hurdle, well you're in for a bit of a laugh because we break down the different types of school parents for you. And we need to caveat this teags because this is not a judgment that's in our tagline. We ditch judgment. No, No, We're not about judgment. This is an observational piece.

Yes, it's a scientific experiment. And the great part is sometimes we may be these people. It's all about that twenty second interaction at the school gate. We have substantial evidence to support our research.

I've got seven years.

Yeah, yes you do.

Other historian, historical historian, and you know this is universal. These types of parents are at every single school across Australia.

You know what we are amongst them as well. So we're there and we're with you, and we can't wait to share what we've identified about.

These rare species as we live in.

Breath and as always we will hear from our friend Sarah Marie. But first, here's what's happening in my group chat. Well, you know what's not happening in my group chat? Just picking the Christmas date, you know, with family in the girlfriend chat. You know how every year you might do a Christmas lunch or a Christmas dinner or a Christmas and I swear to God, every year we say, right, we're doing the first weekend of December, or we're doing the last weekend of November, and this is what we say for next year. So we don't have to just carry on about it for twelve months.

But why would you think about a social function twelve months in advance? That's insane.

No, But at least because we've got girls into state, We've even got girls like overseas, so we lock in that date and already what are we in August? People are like, what date is our Christmas thing?

Now? And we're like, isn't it always the same date?

I'm not ready for Christmas?

Yeah, they're ready for Christmas, aren't they.

Here we are in a very not very rather unique situation. It occurs quite regularly, often five to ten times a week. There are many many different species conquer gate in the one area. Often it might be the car drop off and pickup line, but also could be known us the school gate. I will now bust it over to our historical historian to analyze the species that we have discovered in our very elaborate research.

Thank you, Tagan Atten rah So.

In our historical research today, we have found the seven archetypes of school parents. All right, the first archetype that I present to you the committee parent. Now, if you're a mama mer out loud listener, you'll know this archetype as the Nicole of the group. She organizes every event, fundraiser, social event. She's the class rep reminding everyone when Harmony Day is the single source of truth, of all knowledge, of all the things. Schools as we know them would crumble and collapse as an institution without them.

Yes, the mum that I am would crumble without Nicole's telling me what day it is.

And when all the things.

Yeah, when library day, newsday, dress us days, all the things.

Thank you Nicole.

Thank you Nicole for your active service.

You know what.

I am on the committee, but I'm not a Nicole. No, I'm all right to help plan an event, but I'm not reminding anyone about it, not doing anything at the forefront of people because they annoy me often. So I will leave all the interactions to Nicole. Like she's like a frontline worker.

She's in the trench.

She's in the drench, shutting her life at risk every.

Day, every day showing mums like us thank.

You, she's there, like we salute her so much.

We love Nicole. Committee mums. That's number one. What's number two?

Parent archetype Number two is active where sporty. So she looks fierce in her Lulu Lemon. She's straight to Larties after drop off. She's potentially making some bliss balls when she gets home after school snacks. She's a regular at the park book week and Easter Hat parade. Costume and accessories are definitely handmade.

You know what else I love about the active where parent is that they look better in their active where than I do in a ball gown, like they are done born to lycra.

Yeah.

See, I consider myself an active bear. In most days, I don't know what else to put on. I'm not quite sure what the weather's going to be. I've got my pajama shirt on. Oh, tights will go like this. But like the true active where sporty mums, they look chic and they exercise and see, I'm not actually active.

No at all.

She is troubling and concerning for your health. But yes, well, so welcome back to that on another day. I've definitely been active where mum at I would say the sort of beginning years of primary school parenting. Not that I was that active, but definitely wearing active where because I worked part time and freelance, so I was a lot more flexible with my time.

I was at school, drop off and pick up a lot more.

And I just loved that time, like it was such a simple, beautiful time where I felt very connected to the school community because I was able to be there.

I was able to do.

The reading lessons and volunteer. I had time Nicole, Nicole, No, not Nicole, but I was. I was volunteering the reading and doing the I had time, so I gave it.

And I'm glad that I was able to have that.

Time because I certainly don't now she's the single working, full time mum era.

Okay, that was number two. Number three is so this.

Is pajamas slash frazzled, this is she's a hot mess.

Well why don't we name this one.

I'm taking so slippers and ug boots.

Sometimes a two piece flannel set, possibly even a dressing gown might have been more on to drop off.

Not pick up. That would be a little bit troubling. And see three o'clock.

Sometimes I'll dabble and I'll do the active wet but with slippers. Yeah, so I'm like, whoop's clearly not going to the gym.

And I also me I do crocs and with the pajamas justly unhinged look really.

And the non brushed hair.

I've often been the frazzled mom, Like I've actually even had a dad walk past me while in pajama frazzled mum mode saying Tigan just breathe.

Oh wow, and I was gonna go not today, make you watch out. Look, we're very frazzled.

It's more about the mental load of the children, like did you get lunch?

Where's your library bag? Have you packed the home readers?

Oh?

Sugar? Do you have your sports shoes on? Okay?

Now where do we put this? Now we've got to get it out? Do you have you jumper? Where's your hat?

Yeah?

I mean it just never ending.

Yeah, And like it's like you're hearing her thoughts.

And because it's.

Nearing the moment where they all need to be it together, it gets a lot more frazzling. What else have you collated for us in your thesist today?

This archetype may sound very familiar, very close, really sort of get you in the fields because she is Nita Wine chatty Kathy.

Oh.

She was a party girl when she was at school and is now a party mum. She can be seen with a bottle of bubbles or cheeky seltzer at the park after school. She definitely has travel cups but for booths, and she makes school events fun and loves to have a goss and a chat. Oh look, and she is an elite.

Yeah.

I was gonna say that's a little bit of me too. Yes, especially in COVID, you know.

Oh yes, and we are saying she yeah, because she is me and we and we But this is not gendered.

No, no, no, this is hair rents, hair rents. Yeah.

We're just identifying ourselves in every character reference so far.

Correct.

Yeah, and we hope you are too, or maybe one more than the other. Anyway, continue next.

Archetype number five. Compare the parent.

Okay, I needed to explain this one to me.

Okay, So they feel no shame in asking what your kid's naplane result was and talking about what level reader their child is on and asking for yours. They would like to compare notes on reports, end of term reports, mess reports, and they would like to swap tricks and tips for online learning tools like mathletics, athletes and Prodigy.

I don't know any of the stuff you're talking about right now.

You're going to get to that stage. Okay, it's all about still here.

So there's no one actually gives a shit where their kids are because they're like, can they hold a pencil?

Like that's like a milestone.

I remember the readers level of readers was a bit of a compare the parents. Oh, I don't identify with this because I just I don't really care. But I don't feel offended if people do ask me.

When they're asking, I don't think it's always comparing. I think it's four in the moms like us that just think, oh, am I doing the right thing. Sometimes I would love to ask people in bet in Joe's class, because I'm like, I see, okay, it's what he's doing alright. But you'll never know unless you hear what other people's kids are doing.

Well.

Actually, with the Naplan results, because we just got some results the other day, they do the average level of the children in the entire state like a graph, and then they do the average of the children level at your school, and then where your child is at, so you.

Really can compare them to oh, oh way, but it doesn't. But it's not specific other students. You don't know other students.

And that's why compare the parent parents ask number six done this before?

Parents?

Oh yeah, likely has.

Several children at the school and you are in their last child's Kindy slash prep year. They don't have the same deer in headlights look as the other kindy parents. They didn't cry at the first KINDI or Prep drop off, no tissues required. They have a lays a fairness that as a first time school parent you can only dream of. And if you do happen to befriend them and you're lucky enough to you ask them all questions.

I am definitely that with Banjo. However, I did cry at the first day of Kinney because I was so happy, just relieved.

I was so happy.

All the mom's like, wow, she's really emotional, can you mom? I'm like, I'm just guys, like I can have my life back. This last cab off the rank that is good and I reckon. You can definitely sniff those one day relaxed. So they're like the opposite to frazzled Well, they can be a frazzled pajama the opposite to committee Nicole, Like don't you reckon, They're just like don't care, will show up, not interested, but will be there. But just so chill, so relaxed, so blase, like they don't even need the information because they just know it because they've done seven of them before, or if.

They don't know what they happen to care, they don't care.

They'll be there.

I amn't done this before, parent, because my eldest is about to finish primary school.

However, what does that mean?

The circle of life continues. Next year he'll be in high school and I will be the deer in headlights.

I'm going to go back.

You're like the new KINDI parent. I know high school. You're get you nervous.

It's like, will there be the same archetypes? Do they evolve in high school?

I don't know.

It's like you're starting a new school, the last and final archetype.

It's throws some money at it. Parent.

They're time poor but very happy to throw money at the problem, Like they would prefer to buy a whole book of raffle tickets rather than man Book Week parade costumes are definitely storeborn.

Oh yeah, I am throw some money at it, parent.

Yeah, as am.

I I'm quite frugal and thrifty, but I'm not going to make a book week costume. Literally on the way here, I was googling costumes for book week and then I was thinking to myself, Oh, I could do the iron on the T shirt things, and I could, but.

I'm not gonna. I'm just gonna order it.

I can't even say button, yeah neither. But I tell you who's worse than me. My husband. I'm a real like to get involved if I do have time, but He's like, sponsored the event, aligned they'll do it, And I'm like, no, why don't you come and help set up a table or do the barbecue or I don't know.

Moelorn or something. I'll pay for someone to do that.

But this is why we need all of these seven archetypes for the school community to function.

We can need them.

We need the people that do the things, the people that pay for the thing.

The people that tell you about the things.

And then as a whole we come together and we go back to we are one, but we are many, and we share the same dream and.

Sing with one voice, Ah, yeah you are. We are school pairents dropping off gart kids.

So tigs. In summary, the seven archetypes that we.

Have observed, YEP, I think we need to do a quiz.

I think people should be able to go online and take a survey, oh my gosh, and then discover which one they are, yeah, and which one is your high moon rising? You know, it's like the zodiac. All right, let's make these names snappier for them though. Yeah, so the committee parent, I'm comfortable with the Nicole yep, Nicole active, We're sporty. That's not snappy enough a name for a quiz at leisure achiever. Ath the leisure achiever pajamas and frazzled is obviously one that's very close to my heart. So I feel like as a tribute to me, Yeah, we should call her the hot Mess.

Yeah, and look I bought a line on this one.

Need a wine Schoolgate chatterbox Yeah sometimes, but we should probably just drop the wine for the quiz, all right, chatty Kathy, great compare the parent. You cannot compare that is that was already that was already snappy and quiz friendly.

That's great.

Done this before.

Oh they've done that. The been there, done that, Yeah, been there, done that, mum.

Not doing it tomorrow?

Not not interested? No, and throw money at it. It's not just about money and finance. No, they're just smart, because what are they doing? Outsourcing? Yes, they are, they're the outsaucer.

Yeah.

Okay, so you can head online and you can find the quiz. We're going to share the link in the show notes. Yep, what type of school parent are you? And then hop on Mama mea Facebook and tell us we want to hear. We want to hear from Nicole's hot messes.

Was it accurate?

Yeah?

Did we get it right?

Obviously you can probably relate to a few like us. We want to hear yours?

Yeah?

Sure, And coming up our friend Sarah Marie, what type of school mum.

Would you be?

I think she'd definitely be chatty Kathy. Maybe she's in she's never the hot mess No, definitely not.

Hi, it's Sarah Marie.

What type of school mum would you be? I talk to everybody. I don't make necessarily group chats, but I.

Talk to everyone, and I know what's going on with everyone's life, like that is me. I know what's happening. I know in it's someone's birthday. I'm the mom that like if you invite my son to your birthday, we're gonna go to.

Your kid's birthday like I do.

My best to get my kids interactive, and I do my best to put an effort in with the friends of my kids' parents. So that's me.

As a mom.

I try to put the effort in a little bit. I am one hundred percent of been there, done at MOUM with some things. I don't have three kids, so I'm not being there, done it with everything. But like when it comes to two kids, I've been there, done that. There's a lot of things. I don't stress about that my friends or you know, some parents at.

The school do stress about if.

We're doing book week, I am not making a costume because I don't have that kind of time in my life. I'm just gonna buy the costume. I'm gonna store it so you can play costumes and dress.

Ups another time with it.

Like my mom would hands so dance costumes, and I don't know how she had the time for that. She would like make all of our like Easter hat, parade hats, and she put in so much fet with making stuff, and I admire her for that because that's just not me.

I can't do that.

Get the tool what tool.

Let's get something from the toolkit in my toolkit.

This week you know, as I come to the end of my primary school journey with one of my children.

God, it's not ending soon. We're in any bloody August style, I.

Know, but I feel like it's just time is slipping away.

Who you were paying out me trying to organize my Christmas lunch And really you're already like grieving your primary because it's the year of last, it's the last first day of term three, it's the last book week.

Wow.

I love our different different stages of life because I'm like, this is my first year of freedom.

It's my first year of all my kids at school. Wow, different of the spectrums.

I hope you go in and be a full blown committee nicole mum at the high school.

I might I could transform.

Yeah, probably not. It's nice to have dreams and.

Goals, yeah, ambition.

But my talk is the Nicholes of my primary school journey. One friend in particular, Emma, she is the Nicole of also our friendship group. So she's the organiz of all the things and that translates to school and she has been class rep I think every year for seven years, telling everyone all of the things. If I don't know something, I just sent her a little sneaky message so everyone doesn't know that I don't don't know, yes, I And then often she'll send me just a little reminder of the morning separately, She'll already know that I don't know, because that's what Emma's and Nicholes do.

They know when you don't know. Stuff.

She has got me through the last six and a half years, and to all the other parents as well. Often I'll get photos sent to me from other parents who are at the athletics kind of when I'm at work, and I just feel like, as you go through primary school, you get this beautiful community, correct, and you all help each other out in different ways. And I've had such a wonderful school experience. I've still got a few years left for the younger ones, so hanging in there.

Wait, what was the toolkit part of that?

Just?

My toolkit is the Nicoles?

Oh so your toolkit literally the parent Okay, I love that. Well, I've got one in my toolkit. But this is for the throw the money out at parents. Oh that's me too, Okay, great. I think Nicole would like this as well because she's very organized. So I'm not usually an organized person, but recently we did a trip and because it was winter, we.

Needed a lot of big, big things.

And I thought to myself, if only I could vacuum seal stuff in the suitcase. And then I thought I could do that for the way there, but the way back. How so of course I jumped on that. I'm like, if I thought of it, it has to exist, like a portable vacuum seal sucky vacum thing like not so you don't need an actual vacuum. And yes they exist guys on Amazon. There's like a battery operated little vacuum so that it's like a travel vacuum seal bag thing here.

For the way home, even in summer. You need that because if you buy things on your tape, you've always got more things on the way.

So now I bought like this whole box of I think thirty six. Like there's jumbo bags and small bags.

That kid, you've got five people in my family.

That's I'm not even sure if it'll be enough, to be quite honest with you.

Who are going to take the kids skiing for the first time.

So there's like bloody four ski pants and five scars, so many bulky things. Anyway, Game changer you're welcome, Nicole, and you're welcome. Throw the money at a parent. Thank you for your service, Teak, and yes, look look at me being like a Nicole telling you about things.

Thank you for listening to this glorious mess.

We hope you enjoyed the episode and we'd love it if you left us a rating, all of you.

If you love the show.

Yes, and tell us which parent you are.

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Yes.

And if you have a dilemma you'd like Sarah Maritis of you can leave us a voice note by following the link in the show notes, or get in touch with us at TGM at mammamea dot com dot au. This episode was produced by Grace roof Ray with audio production by Lou Hill.

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